Byler Theory - Tumblr Posts

He estado pensando, y tengo un detalle que nadie se había fijado por lo que he visto que refuerza la teoría del Flickergate.

El codigo ruso.

El puto código ruso.

He aquí mi interpretación:

"La semana es larga, el gato plateado come cuando el azul se encuentra con el amarillo en el oeste, un viaje a China suena bien, si pisas ligeramente."

Iré por partes

"La semana es larga": Al principio de S4 escuchamos a Once escribir una carta a Mike, diciendo que Joyce dice que el tiempo parece más corto o más largo dependiendo de nuestras emociones, esto porque ella dice que esas semanas se le han pasado volando.

Los Byers y Once llevaban 6 meses en California, pero cuando Mike y Will hablan del tiempo que llevan separados dicen que ha pasado un año.

—"Ha pasado un año, Mike."

—"Llevabas un año sabiéndolo y no me dijiste nada!"

Sin embargo, siguen siendo solo 6 meses.

Esto podría ser por lo que dijo Joyce, al estar Will y Mike separados, sintieron que paso mucho más tiempo, por eso lo de "la semana es larga" porque las semanas siempre duran lo mismo, por las emociones se puede sentir más larga, en este caso, por su separación, ambos sienten que ha sido largo.

"El gato plateado come cuando el azul se encuentra con el amarillo en el Oeste"

El gato plateado es Vecna, que mata a Chrissy.

Se "alimenta" de su vida, sus recuerdos y en si, Chrissy misma.

¿Y cuando pasa esto?

Cuando Will se encuentra con Mike en California.

Will llevaba ropa azul y Mike ropa amarilla

Que casualidad, no?

"Un viaje a China suena bien, si pisas ligeramente"

China es un lugar muy lejano a Estados Unidos, así que podemos interpretarlo como un sitio que está lejos, como el Upside Down.

Pisar ligeramente es pisar sin hacer ruido, con sigilo, es decir, andar con cuidado.

Por lo que:

"El tiempo separados es largo, Vecna mata a Chrissy cuando Will se encuentra con Mike en California, un viaje al Upside Down suena bien, si caminas con cuidado"

Quizá esto no signifique nada y solo este sobrepensando, pero podría significar algo, y en ese caso, darnos una pista de que Mike y Will estarán en el Upside Down, haciendo posible la teoría Flickergate :D

Tengo que hablar de algo muy importante. Si, paralelos de Byler con It.

Mucha gente lo compararía con Reddie (Eddie y Richie) pero narrativamente no encajan del todo, a pesar de sí tener similitudes.

Lo que quiero decir es que hay un triángulo amoroso en ambos universos.

Un triángulo amoroso en el que dos personas buscan el amor de ese interés romántico, el cual es bastante despistado al respecto. Uno de los personajes enamorados le hace un regalo al interés romántico, pero este piensa que el regalo es de parte del otro personaje, el que es más fácil de amar.

Por si no es obvio, me refiero al paralelo de Beverly siendo quién Bill y Ben quieren contra el de Mike siendo quién Once y Will quieren.

Ben/Will le daría un regalo hecho desde lo más profundo de su corazón a Beverly/Mike, quien piensa que el regalo es de Bill/Once, y prefieren no discutirlo a pesar de que no tenga mucho sentido porque es más fácil amarlos, en el caso de Beverly, es más fácil amar a Bill debido a que (si, seré cruel) es más atractivo. En el caso de Mike, es mucho más fácil amar a Once, porque ella es una chica.

Tienen que pasar 27 años para que Beverly por fin se dé cuenta de que ese regalo nunca fue de Bill y estuvo detrás de la persona incorrecta. (Y al final termina con Ben)

Si el paralelo es como yo pienso, Byler siendo endgame es más fácil que nunca.

En mi opinión byler es mejor que mileven por muchisisisisimos motivos, pero haré una lista.

1-Mike y Will se entienden entre sí mucho mejor de lo que lo hacen Once y Mike, esto se ve por ejemplo en la temporada 4 cuando Mike y Once pelean porque Mike no sabe decirle a Once que la ama y ella NECESITA que se lo diga pero él no puede explicarle que no puede, por otro lado, Mike y Will tienen una conversación acerca del distanciamiento de su amistad y podemos notar que es mucho más cercano, más íntimo, se entienden el uno al otro y no hace falta palabras de afirmación porque ya lo saben.

2-Ni Mike ni Once se sienten cómodos con el otro del todo. Cuando Once está con Mike, finge tener muchos amigos en California y que es genial aunque le hacen bullying ahí, por otro lado, Mike deja de jugar a DnD cuando está con Once, pero cuando ella se va, él vuelve a jugar. Además de que Mike mencionó en una conversación con Will que se siente inseguro en su relación porque siente es menos que Once o que vale menos. Sin embargo, Will y Mike se sienten cómodos el uno con el otro, se cuentan sus problemas y se apoyan, todo el tiempo. Pasan tiempo juntos haciendo cosas que a ambos les gustan.

3-Mileven es tóxico. Así es, suelto la bomba. Fingen ser quien no son con el otro, Mike deja de salir con sus amigos para estar con ella (cosa que puede ser entendible por la edad, pero sigue estando ahí) se mienten el uno al otro, no se sienten cómodos, cuando pelean no se disculpan. Por otro lado, byler es lo opuesto. Hacen cosas juntos, son su mejor versión con el otro, se dicen casi siempre la verdad (a excepción de sus crushes), se sienten cómodos con el otro y lo buscan, se cuidan y aseguran de estar cerca del otro tanto física como emocionalmente, y cuando pelean siempre se disculpan y arreglan las cosas (como dato que demuestra esto, tenemos en la temporada 3, cuando Mike y Once pelean porque Mike mintió, el después de la pelea es un momento feliz y agradable, Once con Max, descubriéndose a si misma, Mike tranquilo en su sótano comiendo papas fritas y quejándose. Sin embargo, ese mismo capitulo, cuando Mike y Will pelean es todo lo contrario. El momento es sombrío y triste, y el después de la pelea es devastador, con Will destruyendo el castillo Byers, su lugar seguro, y Mike corriendo en mitad de la lluvia para pedirle perdón)

4-Es lo mejor para los tres. Mike se siente insuficiente con Once. Once se siente encerrada con Mike. Will se siente miserable y que nadie lo puede amar por su orientación. Cuando Once está por si misma se empodera. Cuando Mike y Will están juntos están completos, felices, amados.

Escribí esto en la madrugada debatiendo con un mileven shipper empeñado en que no tiene sentido que shippee byler

So, this is my first original theory.

I say original because I’ve never seen someone else make this observation, and I spend an unhealthy amount of time crawling tumblr for new Byler content. But it’s completely possible that someone else has had this thought before. If so, feel free to link other blog posts in the comments. But I think I’m onto something here, and it’s all about Will Byers’ Neck Tingles™️.

One thing I’ve noticed in S3 & S4 is that almost every time Will gets his neck tingles, it occurs in conjunction to him reacting to an emotionally charged encounter with Mike. We’re made to think he gets this feeling when the mind flayer is doing something, but if that were the case his neck should be tingling every second of season 3, because in that season the Mind Flayer has a very physical presence in Hawkins and is working tirelessly to execute his plan. So why does Will only sense his activity at seemingly random times and not constantly? And if they’re *not* random, can we find a pattern? I think we can, and it actually has nothing to do with the Mind Flayer. It has everything to do with Mike.

I posit this question for your consideration: Could Will’s feelings for Mike be a doorway into his mind for the Mind Flayer / One to call out to him? Could he be reminding Will of his presence every time Will feels lonely or hurt or ashamed because of his feelings for Mike? Almost like an invitation for Will to join him, an offer to fill the void Mike is leaving in Will’s heart?

Moving forward let’s define what Will’s neck tingles actually are: extra sensory perception - meaning the ability to sense something through means other than sight, sound, taste, touch, or smell; think a “sixth sense.” This sense is presumably caused by the connection the Mind Flayer / One made with him when he possessed him, exposure to the upside down when he was kidnapped by the demogorgon, or a combination of both. Alternatively Will may have already had this “true sight” prior to the events of S1, and he was targeted for kidnapping and possessing because he had the power. Either way, by the time we get to S3, Will has the extra sensory ability to feel the Mind Flayer’s / One’s presence. But what triggers this feeling in the show is unclear.

The first time we see Will get this feeling he’s having his movie date with Mike. Now, it seems obvious that he felt the Mind Flayer / One’s (hereafter, just One) presence in this case because the gate re-opened at that precise moment. The key is activated, the power goes out across town, One’s connection to Hawkins is reestablished, and Will’s neck tingles. So it’s easy to assume that Mike had nothing to do with that feeling in this scene. Nevertheless, moments later they’re both bright red in the face blushing after Mike notices something off with Will and checks in and they end up locking eyes a bit longer than necessary (not to mention the mutual lip-looking). The scene is already highly suggestive of romance: they’re basically on a double date with lumax, they’re sitting together apart from the other couple, they both just stuck their hands in the same candy bag at the same time, etc.

(Another thing, what triggers Mike’s concern for Will here? Mike doesn’t see the look of fear growing on Will’s face. He doesn’t see Will touching the goose flesh on his neck. Will doesn’t say anything or really make a sound. Will does nothing that should get Mike’s attention except… start breathing differently? Like, Mike heard Will’s breathing change and got concerned? Oh my God that boy has it bad. That’s got nothing to do with my theory, I just think it’s sweet.)

Getting back on track, the gate opens and Will feels it, exactly at the moment he’s having a romantic evening with the boy he loves. I think we’re misdirected by the cut to the gate opening and the power outage to distract us from the romantic nature of their evening. And while it may have just been a coincidence that the gate opens while they’re having this romantic evening, many of the following neck tingles moments also coincide with important moments between Will and Mike, developing something of a pattern.

The next time we see it happen is when the gang is walking up the hill to assemble cerebro. We see that a bunch of possessed rats are scurrying by in the field near them. We’re led to believe this close proximity to One’s activity is what gives Will this neck-tingly feeling. But he is elsewhere in the season in close proximity with flayed beings and doesn’t get the neck tingles. What does happen right before he feels it, and before we see the rats, is that Mike ditches him to be with El and we see how sad this makes Will. Again, could sadness over losing Mike to El be the thing that lets One into Will’s mind?

The next moment occurs while Will is destroying castle Byers immediately after his friend-breakup with Mike. Now, if his tingles are about proximity, there is no explaining why he has this episode at this moment. It also appears to be the most intense feeling of One’s presence yet, as when Mike and Lucas find him his there is a determined look on his face and his eyes look nearly crazed. He is now certain that the Mind Flayer is back. But, why now? If my theory is right, this was the most emotionally intense moment he’s ever had with Mike, leading to a full blown emotional breakdown - sobbing, hyperventilating, outbursts of destructive behavior. So the most intense Mike-moment so far happens just before his most intense feeling of One’s presence. Coincidence?

The next time Will feel it is during the sauna test and, before we begin, I just need to ask…How tf does Mike know the exact layout of the men’s locker room and gym? Is Mike a secret athlete who pumps iron and sweats in the sauna on weekends? Doubtful. Obviously all of the kids would have come to this pool on summer days growing up, but it seems like only Mike has done any exploring in the gym. I wonder what would motivate that little guy to explore the layout of the mens gym and locker room 🤔

Mooooooving on. This one is interesting, because no major Mike-and-Will moment happens in this episode; rather, the whole episode is one giant Mike-and-Will moment. For one, the two are in near constant physical proximity, even after having just gone through an unresolved fight. Like, they’re glued to each other. If this is how they fight, god help us when they’re a couple and having a good day together. For two, both Will and Mike undergo some important character building moments through the episode. Mike attempts to apologize to El but is rebuffed and discovers that El spied on him, causing a serious rift in trust for Mike. Will is on the other end of an apology, this time from Lucas, but he rebuffs Lucas saying that he didn’t care anymore and that there were more important matters at hand. I suspect the former statement is a lie even if the latter statement is true. Will is running from his heartache by jumping into action. And jumping into action just so happens to put him back in the mix with Mike in a way that is comfortable and familiar. Hence how close they stick to each other despite still technically “fighting.” For Mike’s side of that equation, he clearly feels horrible for how he treated Will, and is compensating for that by being even more attentive to him than usual. Notice how close they’re standing to each other, specifically when they’re conducting the sauna test itself.

And so we get to the neck tingle moment. We as the audience already know Billy is possessed, and the kids have more or less figured it out. So we don’t need Will’s neck to tell us what we already know. Nevertheless, it happens, and it is Mike and Mike alone who notices Will getting the feeling. Mike alone who understands what Will is trying to communicate and warns max to get away from the door just in the nick of time. (And it’s Mike who can’t tear his eyes off of Will even while trying to warn max). The neck tingle here is the catalyst into an intimate moment between the two of them, further solidifying for each other and for the audience just how close their bond is, how in tune they actually are with each other, and how that bond is critical for the survival of the group.

Also, consider how homoerotic this whole episode is. Two gay (if I’m right) teen boys in the throes of puberty in a men’s locker room, surrounded by half naked men, laying plans to capture a man in the sauna, all culminating in established teen heartthrob Billy Hartgrove nearly naked, trapped in the sauna… the whole goddamn thing is just so queer. So Will has another episode of neck tingles during what is arguably the most homoerotic sequence in the show? Lol

Next, the party is at the hospital with Nancy and Jonathan as they seek to check on Mrs. Driscoll. Now, multiple flayed beings are in this hospital at this moment, but Will doesn’t sense them until they die and merge into one. This is further evidence that proximity doesn’t seem to be the trigger for Will’s extra sensory perception. The first thing that tips off Will that something paranormal is afoot before anyone else notices isn’t his neck. It’s the lights. They start to flicker and Will notices first, and then everyone else. The neck tingle only come when the creature in the hospital is fully formed, but by then everyone already knows nancy and Jonathan are in danger. But what do we see right before the neck tingles, and right before the lights start to flicker? Will sitting at the end of the row of chairs, third wheeling hard and not feeling good about it.

While again we are led to believe that the monster’s formation is the sole reason Will gets his neck tingles, once again the tingles “coincidentally” happen right after Will has been clearly upset by Mike and his relationship with El. Mike has just initialed the “make-up” phase of his totally straight relationship with El, and literally shooed Will away to have that moment (even though Mike does a full hate-to-see-you-go-but-love-to-watch-you-leave body scan of Will as he’s walking away). And then we see Will sitting miserably as the ultimate third wheel - all of his other friends (including his best friend/love of his life) are coupled up and he’s by himself. Fuckin rough, kid.

The next tingle event happens at Hopper’s cabin. Interestingly enough, despite the Monster initiating its final phase, assimilating all of its sleeper cells in the community, and charging full speed to the cabin, Will doesn’t feel anything. Not until Nancy, Mike, and Lucas piece it together: the mindflayer knows where they are. Even as they’re piecing it together, slowly, it’s only when Mike has his “ah-hah…oh-no” moment that Will feels his presence coming. Up until this point, the neck tingles have been a plot device to alert our characters (and us) to imminent danger. But here the characters (and we) figure it out before Will feels anything. It serves no real narrative purpose (unless it’s to say he has the worlds most useless superpower) except to link this ability to his relationship with Mike. Will sees Mike having his realization, and *then* he feels the monster’s imminent presence.

Two more observations about this episode: First, Will did not sense the piece of the monster inside of El the whole time between when she gets “bit” at the cabin, and when she feels it squirming inside of her at the mall. He didn’t feel it’s presence inside of her in the grocery store, even though the very blood El left on the floor was teeming with mind flayer particles. (Also, bruh. Why were Will and Mike basically in each other’s laps in that “new coke” scene? Like, there was plenty of space on the edge of that {fruit section} cooler. They didn’t have to be on top of each other. Keep in mind they’re still this close *after* a fight they have yet to resolve).

Second, Mike is the one who rips off the piece of the creature attached to El’s leg, causing obvious physical trauma to her in the process, also possibly causing that piece to be ripped off and left inside of her. A more careful approach of removal might have spared her the loss of her powers and prevented One’s absorption of her ability to open portals. Or maybe it would have just hurt her less. Who knows. Either way, nice going Mike.

The battle of Starcourt. Finally, his last tingle of the season happens right before the monsters crashes through the mall ceiling, but immediately after Mike goes to check on El. Earlier in the episode, the og party shares a group hug as they’re now all reunited. Will places his hand on the small of Mike’s back. Mike doesn’t seem to mind. They were already standing very close together. I think this moment, for Will, feels like the repair of a breach. For a moment, they’re the old party again. And Mike is the heart of that party for Will, the thing which keeps them together, but also the thing that’s been letting them fall apart lately. Interesting that once Mike walks away from the party and toward El, Will feels the tingle. Mike is very preoccupied with El during most of the battle. Understandably. He knows the monster is there for her, not for Will (for once). But when the dust settles and El is holding Max to comfort her after Billy’s death, you’d think Mike would be trying to comfort El, who is also clearly distraught. But instead, once the danger is neutralized, we see Mike looking not at El, but up at the balcony where Will is, presumably making sure he’s okay.

We see Will’s neck tingle one more time in the S4 finale, with Will now back in range of One’s psychic influence. Will tells Mike that he’s been able to feel One since getting back to Hawkins earlier that day, but we don’t see him get the tingles. Now, nothing happens to Will in S4 that isn’t directly related to Mike. They obviously share some deeply painful moments and some beautiful, healing moments. At the start the rift between them is bigger than we’ve ever seen it, and both boys seem to think it’s the other one who is pulling away. In reality they’re both pulling away because they’re afraid of their feelings for each other. They don’t want to get to close because they might get hurt. But well before the end we see them once again standing shoulder to shoulder every chance they get, being vulnerable with each other and leaning on each other emotionally. Despite El being objectively in more danger than Will is, Mike’s attention seems to be mostly on Will. Even after reunited with El, Mike chooses to stand nearer to Will, more often than not. We’re well on our way to getting S2 Byler back. So, after such an intense season-long emotional roller coaster with Mike, Will starts to feel One again, and apparently feels him most intensely when the spores begin pouring out of the upside down into Hawkins. Again, we’re led to believe there is a one-to-one correlation here. The rift starts belching out spores, Will feels the tingle. But what’s going on right in front of Will when he gets the tingles? We only see the back of his head so we can’t confirm what he was looking at, but we can see Jonathan and the direction of his gaze: Mike, hugging Hopper. I’m certain this is what Will was starting at the moment he gets the final tingle of the show so far. The shot even transitions from Mike’s face, looking very contented resting on Hopper’s shoulder, to the back of Will’s head, connecting those two moments in the audience’s mind.

Now, Mike sees Hopper as a father figure by merit of his relationship with El, and due to the fact that Hopper has many times been Mike’s (and Will’s) literal defender from mortal danger. He has been under the belief that Hopper has been dead for 9 months. Of course Mike is going to hug him after finding out he’s alive. But it’s interesting that this season is bookended with Mike hugging people - Dustin at the end of episode 1, after they win their DnD campaign, and now Hopper at the end of episode 9. Between these first and last hugs are two hugs with El (the first of which Mike actively breaks in order to… protect the flowers he picked for her?), one with his mother, and one almost-hug with Will. Mike hugs Hopper for roughly that 15-20 seconds. That’s a long time to hug someone. Don’t believe me? Go try it.

So, Will sees this and must be thinking “what the hell?” right? After Mike flatly refuses to hug Will at the airport Will probably went on a whole ass emotional odyssey trying to figure out why Mike was behaving so strangely toward him. Last time they saw each other they hugged (and a very intimate, not-so-platonic-looking hug at that) and now that half a year has gone by without seeing each other, Mike doesn’t hug him? Maybe Mike has changed. Maybe he doesn’t feel comfortable with hugs anymore. Maybe it’s another thing he’s “outgrown.” That’s fairly typical of teenage boys, right? But here Will sees just how comfortable Mike actually is with physical affection… just not with him. I can only imagine seeing that must have felt like reliving the moment in the airport all over again - what’s wrong with me? Why won’t he hug me? Etc. and then - boom, neck tingles. Jonathan sees all of this too - he gave Mike dagger eyes after rejecting Will’s hug at the airport, and here we see him again looking at Mike with a rather disapproving expression. He is also wondering wtf is wrong with Mike. Obviously, Byler shippers know the answer. He’s afraid to hug Will at the beginning of S4 because he’s resisting his feelings for him. But Will doesn’t know that. Jonathan may be on his way to figuring it out, but still resents Mike for sending so many confusing signals to Will. Anyway all of this leads to the final shot of the season where Mike chooses to stand next to Will rather than follow El into the field, and we see the end game couples paired up behind her on the hill.

So, what is the point of all this? Correlation does not prove causation. And I’m not arguing that Will gets his neck tingles *because* of Mike. Clearly the tingles demonstrate a connection between Will and One. But I do think it’s interesting that it only ever happens when Mike is around, and almost always after an emotionally charged moment with him. This could mean two things. First, that One senses when Will is having feelings regarding Mike and chooses those moments to reach out and make contact; and/or the show runners want us to subconsciously connect Will’s extra sensory perception with his relationship with Mike. Why would they want us connecting Will’s relationship with Mike to his extra sensory connection to One? Perhaps because it will ultimately be Mike’s love that breaks One’s connection with Will.

Well, that’s it. That’s my theory. Sorry for the weird spacing. I copied and pasted this from my notes on my phone. If you made it through this long rambling post, thank you and I’m sorry lol.

What Letter to Willy tells us…

Two scenes. One song. How both scenes tell us a lot in hidden details…

Letter to Willy… interesting title, no? Not “letter to Billy”, no, the “W” needed to be added to clue us in on how this is about Will.

Not just about Will, but about November 6, 1983.

To begin, let’s talk about both of these scenes. The first one is of Max in the episode Dear Billy. She’s seen at his grave reading her letter to a deceased William. She reads out her feelings and regrets.

The second scene is in the next episode The Nina Project. The song begins playing when Mike and Will catch each others’ eyes while digging and have a heart to heart on top of a car. During the heart to heart, Mike expresses frustration and regret.

Both scenes feature someone who has passed away and their headstone.

Both scenes feature characters dwell on the “what if”s.

Here’s where things get interesting…

Mike referencing someone giving a number… notice how both scenes here involve a car? In fact, it’s almost like we’re viewing the scene on the left from a different perspective (through the car) on the scene on the left. Don’t believe the callback here? Well…

Look at what Mike is holding. 7up. Yup. This is absolutely intentional.

It seems like to me that they’re showing us Mike’s guilt over what happened to Will that night. He has regrets. Possibly because Will actually did die. At least in some timeline.

A little hint to that here too. Associating the “last day of life” with “Mike Wheeler’s basement”…. Can’t really get more on the nose than that. Mike Wheeler’s basement… aka the last place Will was before he “vanished”?

As a writer, he likely wished he could explain himself through writing… in a letter… to Will. Perhaps hoping that an explanation could somehow prevent a tragedy from occurring?

This line makes me suspicious that there’s some sort of time loop 🔁 on the day of Will’s disappearance.

And of course… this all leads back to…

And of course, another possible Back to the Future reference.

For those unaware, Marty saves Doc’s life by writing him a letter and giving it to him in 1955… preventing his death in 1985

What I’m getting at is this: this letter is more significant than you might think. Yes, it is a love letter, but it also is what likely ends up saving Will’s life.

"el will be heartbroken if mileven breaks up!" this, "el loves mike and mike would never hurt her!" that.

have we considered that mike already hurt el with all of his letters and distance and absence whilst she was in california (he doesn't need her, after all, and i think that maybe he just isn't accustomed to her being around in the first place, never really having time to, not properly, and instead.. *checks notes* spends all of that time missing will and participating in things that would have reminded him of will and realising that hawkins wasn’t the same without him and that he was spending too much time with el and lost will or something?), and el was already under the impression that he didn't love her anymore, (even calling him out for it, almost phrasing it like she wanted confirmation, not like she was asking a question- see “but you don’t.. you don’t love me anymore?” except the question mark is also more “but you don’t.. you don’t love me anymore.”,) and that el thought that it was "over" already?

she hurt, she mourned the loss of a boyfriend, and cried like the people in the movies she used to watch during the "break up period", but she took some time away from mike - and everyone else - , came into herself just a little bit more, and got over it, mostly. she isn't shown as thinking about mike once during their time apart post-argument. the only part of the hurt that we see having remained in the aftermath is the anger and avoidance of mike, like he avoided her (and will?).

..at this point trying to hold onto milkvan’s relationship is just hurting both of them (and el isn't even the one trying to cling to the concept. *flashbacks to her describing mike as her first boyfriend 👀*).

with the above in mind, i am headcanoning that el had been accepting of the situation by the time they all reunited and would have been able to move past it until a later date, maybe until after the world stopped ending and they (mike and el) could both talk, until the ily monologue happened, and mike saying he loved her then just felt like bullets on skin because she'd already moved on and began her independence arc... maybe even realised that she didn't love him (anymore) either. he was just too late.

but picture it. el, finally getting time to herself without mike, and for some strange reason coming to the conclusion that he might not be in love with her, when she starts paying more attention to his actions without the distraction of him all over her all the time, and with each letter "from mike" growing more suspicious and realising/thinking he doesn't love her, getting continuously more worried, and then getting enough confirmation from the one day she spent with him to feel justified in her concerns and call him out for it.

almost immediately after said argument she then left a *badass* goodbye note to mike, in which i just wanted to point out the usage of "superhero", because i think that's interesting to me. if she was saying it like "so you could love me again", first of all that's heart-breaking and unhealthy, and secondly then why would she sign it "from el" rather than "love", making an obvious callback to how mike was hurting her and making her think he didn’t love her, mike then not giving any good explanations for mentioned behaviour.

mike bringing up el being a superhero repeatedly afterwards, and highlighting it again in his monologue almost makes me think that her being a "superhero" is more personal to her then mike - her powers should not be there so that mike can love her, and him saying "you're my superhero" in the monologue was only salt in the wound for her, reinstituting that he thought that was the most awesome part about her and what made her loveable or “out of his league” or whatever. (another reason why i love byler- mike doesn’t see will as a superhero, but as a best friend first and foremost, and therefore the love he feels for him is pure, and not an emotional attachment to a glorified ideology in his mind, whereas mileven were barely friends, barely acquaintances, before they kissed.)

the "you're my superhero" thing is also interesting, because finn has stated that this was improv, the duffers having told him to do whatever he wanted during the monologue (😭✋) and that he was "very proud" of this line. meaning he's either unaware of the toxidity of mileven, or he's proud of this line because it adds something more, another detail/relevant callback. and i would be surprised if he doesn't know about mileven's issues, seeing as when asked about byler he stated that he thinks will's love for mike is "beautiful", and i don't feel like you would say that without giving it time and consideration and actually thinking about the situation.

but anyways, back to the point i was making. i feel like it showed mike was yet to realise what he was doing, and that he was going around in circles, not making any obvious developments in his thought processes and unable to tell el anything new, apart from rewording their argument (and mixing in some of eddie's speech about recruiting new dnd players from earlier on in the season, not that el would know) but adding in that he loves her, because she had plainly told him that was what she had wanted. he probably wouldn't have even realised or thought to say so otherwise.

now, lets just stop for a moment. if eddie's "i love you, man" to dustin was meant platonically (which it almost certainly was, because urm obviously,) then who's to say that this one any different? mike is often shown as mirroring eddie throughout this season, even in this speech (as mentioned above).

even by itself, the point still stands that this “i love you” could/can be taken in a platonic way, and despite what else you can say, will was IN the shot of mike's first 'i love you' that he’s said to el's face (although realistically it still wasn't very properly to her face,), and had a literal hand on his back, saying to him that "you have to keep going, you're the heart, mike!" when mike.. looked at him for reassurance halfway through, god. (and el probably heard it.)

(also quickly acknowledging the concept of "you have to keep going, i need to hear you say it so i have confirmation that you will always love her and never me and therefore can force myself to try to move on" from wills pov here.)

and alright, so, in conclusion to this point, i think that el was driven to fight back against vecna by mike's 'i love you' in this scene, but out of strong feelings of sadness and anger rather than love and reassurance (neither of which the monologue truly offered, when taken into further consideration. it's just a very desperate, grasping-at-straws sort of confession. and not even like an emotional, angsty, clinging to her, "you've GOT to hold on, el !!!!" + sobbing into her chest, holding her in his arms, inconsolable desperate that we see with lumax. just a desperate last-ditch attempt of communicating his apparent "feelings").

anyways. just some ily monologue thoughts.. (not sure if this makes any sense at all, it’s sort of everywhere, but. idk. thought i might as well share.. <33) remember: mileven is unhealthy, will is not a homewrecker, but the actual reason the "i love you monologue" is a monologue and includes and "i love you" in it, and byler endgame most hopefully. please duffers. istg.