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Whumptober Prompt Four- Human Shield

Hello all.  I’m trying here.  I’m very much trying to reach out to tumblr to stop the algorithm from targeting me but I am making very little success.  But I’m still trying.  Here’s day four- Human Shield.

AO3 link- https://archiveofourown.org/works/20899490

Lucifer was laughing at some joke Miss Lopez was telling after a successful case when he first felt it. Even though it had been centuries, he always sensed when his twin landed near him.  It had been one of the benefits of being Heaven’s only twinship.

He turned and saw Michael walking down the stairs into the precinct. It seemed she had learned from her siblings as she wore clothes that fit naturally into the human world, not her normal armor, though she looked more like Maze than he would be dumb enough to tell her.  Her golden hair shining in the sun, her fair skin almost glowing, her lifeless blue eyes narrowed onto him.  Had he not known his twin, he would’ve assumed she was a normal human being in a police precinct.

“Lucifer, you okay?  You went all quiet all of a sudden.”  Miss Lopez touched his arm, causing him to jump.

“Get behind me.”  Lucifer hissed.  “Now.”

“Lucifer, what’s going on?”  Chloe, dear sweet Chloe, asked.

“Get behind me and stay behind me.”  Lucifer repeated.

He put his arms out to shield his humans from his sister’s wrath.

Michael had reached them by that point, letting out a humorless laugh.

“Unlike one of us, I still follow our Father’s laws.”

“What do you want, Michael?”  Lucifer asked.

“Can’t I just visit my twin brother?”  Michael pouted, the false exaggeration convincing his humans.

“Dude, you have a twin?”  Miss Lopez asked, sounding excited.

“Has he not told you about me?”  Michael’s eyes gleamed.  “Brother I’m disappointed.  I’m Michael. Lucifer’s twin.”

Dan went to extend his hand but Lucifer kept him back.

Michael rolled her eyes, the natural look for her when the twins met.

“I told you I wasn’t going to do anything to your pets.”  She sneered, her annoyance at him clear.

“Pets?”  Dan said offended, pulling his hand back.

“Why are you here?”  Lucifer demanded.  “You haven’t visited me ever, why are you here?”

“Father, of course.”  Michael said, as if talking to a five-year-old.  “He wanted to thank you for getting rid of his punishment. On Cain.”

Chloe gasped, and reached for her gun instinctively.

“Come, human, you know that won’t work on our kind.”  Michael condescended.

“It’s all right, Chloe, I’ve got this.”  Lucifer tried to give her a hopeful smile.  If her face was anything to go by, he didn’t manage it.

“I thought you never lied, brother.”  Michael teased.

“I’ve received the message.”  Lucifer said.  “There’s no reason for you to stay.”

“Oh, I can think of a few.”  Michael purred, low in her throat.  He took a step back, instinctively,  his arms trying to protect his humans.  She advanced, like a predator stalking prey.  “Uriel, for one.  Mom.  Cutting off your wings.  Running away from your post.  The Rebellion.”

“Go home, Michael.”  Lucifer tried to portray a confidence he didn’t feel.  “Unless you want to reveal yourself to all of these wonderful people.”

“No, I don’t really want to be seen right now.”  Michael replied.

Lucifer cursed under his breath.  When Michael didn’t want to be seen, she wasn’t.

Michael laughed at him.  “Besides, two have already had the revelation, I’m just surprised the male hasn’t gotten it.  Then again, he doesn’t seem to be the brightest type.  After all, Mom liked him.

“Daniel is a bloody brilliant human.”  Lucifer hissed.  “He may be a douche at times, but he’s a good human at heart.  I won’t hear you insult him.”

He felt Dan’s hand on his shoulder, nearly making him jump out of his skin.  Dan squeezed in a way Lucifer recognized as humans trying to assist.  “Maybe you oughta leave.  Lucifer doesn’t want you here.”

Michael laughed her laugh, high-pitched and just as cruel as he remembered it.

“I don’t take orders from humans.”  Michael said, disgust written clearly on her face.  “Let alone a human like you.”

“Why are you here, Michael?”  Lucifer pressed.  “If He just wanted to give me a message, He would be sent Gabriel.  Why did you come?”

“I volunteered, brother.”  Michael rolled her eyes again.  “Gabriel was busier with… more important matters.”

Realization dawned on Lucifer.  “He didn’t send you.  You came here of your own volition.”

Michael sighed.  “Fine.  You caught me.  He didn’t explicitly tell me yes or no so I decided to interpret our Father’s word in my favor.  Just like the humans do.  Just like you did.”

“Well Father never explicitly said I couldn’t go after the Flaming Sword so I decided to interpret his words in my favor.”

Lucifer had said that to her as they fought over access to the Flaming Sword, during his Rebellion.  That fight, while always very fresh in his mind, seemed so long ago right now.

“Just go home, Michael.”  Lucifer pleaded.  He hated submitting power in their conversation but usually when he submitted, Michael left him alone.  Michael liked to play with her food rather than eat it.

“Mhm, don’t really want to, Luci.”  Michael took another step towards him.  “You see, I don’t mind being on Earth as much as our brothers and sisters do.  There’s a few things I’ve missed about you.”

Like watching a train wreck in slow motion, he couldn’t tear his eyes away, knowing exactly what his sister meant.  She cocked a fist back and swung.

He flinched back, hard.

She had stopped maybe an inch from his face.

“Luci, you’re such a coward.”  Michael scoffed.  “Why don’t you just go running to Mom like you always do?  Maybe I should throw you back in Hell myself, since Ammemadiel won’t do his job anymore.  Send you back to where you belong like I did the first time.”

Michael’s boot making contact with his chest, sending him flying across Heaven, falling, unable to stop himself, his wings limp and useless behind him as he fell down, down, down… 

“Lucifer is where he belongs!”  Miss Lopez shouted, surprising him.  She escaped his hold on his humans and threw herself in front of Lucifer.  Lucifer was too stunned to stop her.  “How dare you come in here and try to hurt him?  He’s your brother, your twin, for Chrissake!”

Michael stared at her, wide-eyed.  No one had ever challenged the Soldier of God in such a way before, let alone a tiny human.

Miss Lopez barely noticed, and continued on.  “You should be ready to throw down for him at any moment!  That’s what family is for!  You protect each other, help each other, love each other!  You don’t strike fear into their hearts!  You don’t make them flinch at your touch!  You support them, love them, make sure they know you’ve always got their back!  And you know what, if you won’t do it, then I guess I’ll have to do it for you!”

Miss Lopez stood, all five foot four of her, in front of Lucifer just as he had done moments ago, arms spread wide to protect him.  Chloe was next, putting herself in front of him, followed quickly by Dan.  Lucifer froze, unable to stop them, unable to force himself to put himself in front of his humans to protect them from his sister.

Michael looked dumbfounded, even unsettled, and Lucifer knew her well enough to see the smallest flash of fear in her eyes.  He knew no one had ever called out Michael like this, she ran the Soldiers of Heaven like her own personal army, and no one dared to go against what she said when she decided to say it.  Michael’s face twitched, as if she was unsure of what emotion she wanted to portray, finally settling on a crude smile.

“It was just a joke.”  Michael murmured, obviously trying to diminish the human’s perception of her power, to Lucifer’s astonishment even taking a couple steps back.  “Luci and I used to joke like this all the time. It’s not a big deal.”

“It is a big deal.”  Dan said.  “You need to leave.”

“I didn’t even touch him.”  Michael pouted, the same face she would always make to their Father when they fought sending a jolt through Lucifer.  “He’s just overreacting.  He always overreacts.”

“It doesn’t matter.”  Chloe said.  “You are not welcome here.  Lucifer does not want you here, and if you stay, I’m going to arrest you for trespassing.”

Michael dropped her victim act.  She looked angry, but he knew she wouldn’t strike at him with his humans in front of him.  “Lucifer, I don’t know how you did it, but somehow you’ve gone from leading an angelic Rebellion to leading humans.  If this is how you want to spend your time, go ahead.  Just make sure to remember who can enter the Silver City when she wants to, and who can’t.”

“Go to Hell, Michael.”  Lucifer snapped.  “Maybe you can rule there for a few hundred years.  See how you like it.”

Michael started to draw her fist back again, aborted her actions when Chloe, Dan and Miss Lopez all stood up straighter to protect him, and then stomped off.  He could feel her wings fly her back to Heaven until she was out of his range.

“Oh my gosh that’s your sister?!?  No wonder you never talk about her, growing up together must’ve been Hell.”

“Man, I had no idea your family was like that, I can’t believe your own sister would hurt you like that.”

“Lucifer, are you okay?  Did she hurt you?  Are all of your other siblings like that?  Oh my gosh, was Amenadiel like that?”

All of his humans were talking at the same time, and he could barely distinguish who was saying which words.

“Ella, Chlo, give him some air.”  Dan said, breaking the cacophony of sounds.  “He looks like he’s about to be sick.”

Miss Lopez backed up immediately, and Chloe helped him into her chair.  His chest felt tight, but he wasn’t sure whether to tell Chloe to leave or beg her to stay.  He wasn’t sure what was going on with him at the moment.

“Lucifer?”  Chloe asked, her beautiful eyes scanning him for any injuries.

“Why?”  He finally found his voice through the lump in his throat.

“Why what, man?”  Dan said, gentler than he’d ever heard Dan before.

“Why would you do that?”  Lucifer looked at them, his fear mixing in with his surprise.  His chest started heaving.  “You don’t know what she could’ve done to you.  My sister is one of the most powerful creatures my Father ever created.  She can do things that my siblings can barely dream of.  And you threw yourselves in front of me.”

Miss Lopez put a hand on his arm.  “Of course we did.  I’ve taken a few beatings for my brothers. That’s what you do for family.”

Miss Lopez’s words, while he knew they came from a place of affection, did nothing to help the pain in his chest.  If anything, they made it worse.  He couldn’t breathe.  He couldn’t think.  Michael was going to come back and hurt them, Michael was going to hurt them, Michael was going to hurt him, Michael, Michael Michael-

“Lucifer, you’re having a panic attack.”  Dr. Linda’s voice came through a phone that had been placed next to his ear, shocking him out of his spiral.  “I want you to listen to me very closely.  Can you hear me?”

“Y-y-y-yes.”  Lucifer gasped out.

“Good, good.”  Dr. Linda said.  “Now, I want you to follow my instructions.”

Lucifer tried to do as she asked, controlling his breathing and rationalizing that his heart wasn’t about to beat out of his chest, until the vice around his chest eased and he was himself again, if a little exhausted.

“What was that?”  Lucifer asked.

“A panic attack.”  Dr. Linda explained gently, using her therapy voice.  “People get them sometimes when they’re under a severe amount of stress, such as interacting with an abusive sibling again.”

“The Devil doesn’t panic, doctor.”  Lucifer recited on instinct.

“Of course not, Lucifer.”  Dr. Linda soothed.  “That’s just what humans named them.”

It was then he realized his humans were still crowding around him, shielding him from onlookers and the outside world.  Each one wore an expression of concern and mild fear.

“You back with us?”  Chloe asked.

“When did I leave?”  Lucifer replied.  “I have not left the precinct since we closed the case.  I would not abandon you to my sister’s wrath.”

That elicited small but strained smiles from his humans.

“Lucifer, I’ve got another patient coming in.”  Dr. Linda said, sounding regretful.  “Will you be alright until your appointment tomorrow?”

“I think so, thank you doctor.”  Lucifer said, hanging up Chloe’s phone and handing it back to her.

A stiff silence hung around them for a moment.

Miss Lopez, as expected, broke it.  “Are you okay?”

“I will be, darling.”  Lucifer said.  “Just need a couple tumblers of whiskey, I think.”

“So that’s Michael.”  Dan said, as if testing the name out.  “That’s Saint Michael.  The archangel.”

“Heaven doesn’t actually really have archangels as you humans have created them.”  Lucifer explained.  “Technically, we have ranks in the Heavenly Host but that didn’t matter like you humans assumed it did.  No, what mattered most was who was our Father’s favorites.  Michael was one of them.  I wasn’t.”

Dan wiped a hand across his face.  “That’s nuts.  Man, I used to pray to Saint Michael when I was younger.”

“I doubt she heard you, if it makes you feel better.”  Lucifer said.  “Sainthood is a human creation.  Especially for my brothers and sisters.  Angels have little cares about what happens on the mortal world.  Unless dear old Dad instructs us to.”

Dan nodded.

“Wait, so you finally understand what I am?”  Lucifer asked.

“Kinda hard to not right now.”  Dan shrugged, looking afraid but he didn’t seem to be coming undone at the seams.  “Your sister walks in here and no one notices.  She dresses like Maze but with less visible knives and no one notices.  She threw a punch at you and no one notices.  She says she doesn’t want to be seen and you freak.  She’s been calling us humans and pets and talks about wings and throwing you in hell, again?  Amenadiel promised me Charlotte was in Heaven, and somehow I believed him.  I finally felt at peace after that shitshow with Marcus.   And you’ve been calling yourself the Devil since day one, saying you don’t lie?  Yeah man, I get it now.”

Lucifer stared at him for a moment.  “How do you feel?”

“Don’t focus on me, you’re the one with the fucked up family.”  Dan said.

“Was-” Chloe’s voice was hesitant, “Were all of your siblings like that?”

“No.”  Lucifer said, and all three of them sagged in relief.  “Michael was the only one who ever got physical.  Michael and I were the only twins in the entire Heavenly Host so we had a different relationship than with any of my other siblings.  A lot of them disagreed with me, or just didn’t like me, but Michael was the only one.  The problem wasn’t my other siblings joining in.  The problem was none of my other siblings, nor my parents, believing me.  Michael was the perfect daughter, the perfect angel, the firstborn of the twins.  I was the one who asked too many questions and didn’t do as he was told.”

“I have never wanted to punch God in the face more than I do right now.”  Miss Lopez said, and made to remove her necklace.

“Please don’t, Miss Lopez.”  Lucifer stood on shaky legs, grabbing her hand.  “My father and I may not have the best relationship, but I do know my sister adores you.  Don’t throw away the whole barrel because you don’t like one apple.”

Miss Lopez stopped, and wrapped her arms around Lucifer.  He patted her back.

“Oh my gosh, you don’t like touch, you probably don’t want to be touched right now, do you?  Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry.”  Miss Lopez pulled herself back, though he could tell all she wanted to do was wrap him up and never let him go.

“Thank you, Miss Lopez.  I appreciate the effort.”  Lucifer made sure to give her the most comforting smile he could manage.  She smiled back so he considered that a win.

“Since the case has been solved, the murderer punished, and warm, fuzzy feelings felt, I think it time I retired to Lux.”  Lucifer said, his skin crawling like he wanted to escape his body and this conversation.  “I thank you all for your bravery, and for your affection.  I… do not know how to properly thank you all for this so this will have to do the moment.”

Miss Lopez gave him a much more fleeting hug, this time followed by Chloe.  Dan stuck out his hand, and Lucifer took it, Dan then clapping him on the back.  Miss Lopez went back to her station, and Chloe joined her.

“Hey, Lucifer?”  Dan asked, just as Lucifer was about to walk away from this conversation and escape to his penthouse.

“Yes, Daniel?”

“Do you really think I’m a bloody brilliant human being?”  Dan asked, his tone taking on their usual banter.

Lucifer huffed out a laugh.  “I never lie, Daniel.”

Dan smiled.

“However,” Lucifer added, “do not take this to mean I will stop stealing your pudding, calling you a douche, or making fun of you every chance I get.”

Dan laughed, a genuine one, one he had scarcely heard since Charlotte’s death.  “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Whumptober Prompt #5- Gunpoint

I don’t even know why I’m posting this.  One- it’s garbage.  Two- No one will even see it anyways because I’m going to be flagged within moments.  Well, here it is anyway.  I started this thing and I intend to see it through, whether or not people can see it.  (Though, tumblr, if you’re listening, I seriously want people to see it.  Please.)

As much as Lucifer liked police work, hunting down criminals and making sure they were punished, there were some aspects that he couldn’t stand.  Like going to revisit a crime scene with Dan because Chloe had to be in some meeting with the lieutenant and Lucifer wasn’t allowed in.  Chloe had all but ordered him to recomb the scene with Dan, as he’d previously been restless and annoyed that he wasn’t allowed into an official police meeting.

“Lucifer, you are not a cop.  You’re a civilian consultant.  This meeting is for cops.”

So Dan and Lucifer drove back to the back alley where young Mister James Moren, a college student who lived on the wrong side of town, was shot to death.  Lucifer and Chloe has thought it very cut and dry, Mr. Moren had quite the mouth on him but little money, and their prime suspect was his downstairs neighbor who often was seen annoyed with his antics and exaggerations.  His neighbor was in debt to several bookies and needed money desperately, and Mister Moren had been talking himself up lately.  He had found a new sugar daddy that had paid for a new watch and clothes.  Those things were missing from the scene.  They just needed proof that the neighbor had committed the crime.  So Chloe sent Lucifer and Dan back to the scene, hoping they might find some new evidence or perhaps explain some evidence already found.  She said said that she would meet them at the scene after she was done.  Neither man had been happy about it, but sucked it up for Chloe’s sake, and to help Mr. Moren’s killer get punished.

“You see anything with fresh eyes, man?”  Dan asked, looking at the drone scene photos he held in his hands.

“I have perfect vision, Detective Dou- Espinoza.” Lucifer cut himself off, not because he was lying, but he had been trying to be nicer to Dan at Chloe’s suggestion.  “If I were to see something, I would've seen it the first time around.”

“A lot of first time killers will revisit the scene, to try and make sure the evidence is gone, or plant evidence for a frame job.”  Dan said.  “It’s always good to get a second look.”

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “If they did it right the first time, they wouldn’t need to come back.”

“Don’t encourage the criminals, Lucifer.”  Dan murmured, sounding if Lucifer wasn’t hallucinating, almost fondly exasperated.

Lucifer and Dan were getting on better terms after the whole debacle with Azreal’s blade.  Lucifer has realized that there was more to Dan than he originally assumed, especially since Dan had able to resist Azrael’s blade, not many humans could do that, and Dan had felt like he’d gotten his anger out at Lucifer and had gotten a bit more used to his personality.  Granted, only Lucifer knew that Dan had tried to kill him with a blade so powerful it could kill God, but Dan didn’t need to know that.  They were almost friends.

“Well, well, well, what do we have here?”  Lucifer said, finding a tiny splatter of blood that hadn’t been there before.  As if someone cut themselves trying to get back to the crime scene.

Dan took a picture of it.

Within a moment, Lucifer heard the flash and then a grunt of pain.

“Hurt yourself, Daniel?”  Lucifer’s words died on his lips. The neighbor, a Benny Johnson, had a gun pressed to Dan’s neck.

Lucifer’s hackles rose, no one threatened his humans.

“Is that really necessary?”  Lucifer asked, his tone annoyed, trying to make eye contact with Johnson.

“You’re cops!”  Johnson shouted in Dan’s ear.  Dan winced, and Lucifer’s anger grew.  But he couldn’t flash his Devil eyes or face, as Dan would get it as well.  He kept trying to make eye contact but Johnson kept hiding one eye or both behind Dan, and he couldn’t hold it long enough to try to use his mojo.

“Yes, that’s clearly been established.”  Lucifer remarked.  “Why don’t you release my friend from your greasy grip and we’ll just be leaving?”

“No, no, no, not til you delete whatever you found.”  Johnson said wildly.  “I ain’t going to jail.”

“Well that’s just inevitable at this point.”  Lucifer muttered.

“Shut up, Lucifer.”  Dan growled.  “We can talk this out.”

“I ain’t talking.”  Johnson pushed the gun deeper into Dan’s neck.

“Come now, this isn’t what you want, is it?”  Lucifer said, trying to guide his voice into Johnson’s ear.  “Tell me what you really desire.”

“I… I want… I want you to delete whatever that was!”  Johnson said, his wild movements still protecting him from Lucifer’s full effect.

Lucifer rolled his eyes.  “You’ve said that.”

“Look man, I’m sure you don’t want to hurt me.”  Dan said.  “I’m sure you didn’t want to hurt James, either.”

“Bastard shoulda just told me where he got the damn money!.”  Johnson growled.  “He kept saying that he was gonna get rich soon, just needed investors.  Then one day out of the blue, he shows up with a fancy watch and new locks on his door and nice clothes.  Shoulda shared.  I needed that money more than he did.”

“What is it with you humans and your obsession with money?”  Lucifer groaned, annoyed.  “All you do is fight over it and kill over it and say it’s the most powerful thing on Earth.  I’m beginning to see why my Father sought to include coveting in his commandments, even if they really just are ways to keep you humans in line.”

“How would you know?”  Johnson asked. “You look rich.  You’ve probably never went without.  Born with a silver spoon in your mouth.”

“Please, I once went without eating for over six hundred years.”  Lucifer snapped.  “The food in Hell is not something you want to consume when you’re down there.”

“In Hell?”  Johnson stopped, looking at Lucifer in confusion.

Lucifer pounced.  “Holding a policeman hostage doesn’t seem like your life’s dream.  Tell me, what do you desire?”

Johnson’s grip went slack, even Dan relaxed a little, from looking at Lucifer.

“I… I’m… I’m tired.”  Johnson said, slowly, giving into Lucifer’s power.  “I’m tired, tired of running and wanting, waiting for the breaks that come to others but never to me.  I deserve nice things too!  Why should everyone else get what I want?”

Caught up in Lucifer’s power, in his own declaration, Johnson didn’t noticed Dan moving.  Lucifer, however, did.

As Dan elbowed Johnson, Lucifer grabbed the barrel of the gun and pulled it away from Dan’s neck.  Johnson fired as Dan got out of the way and pain lit up his hand, the bullet tearing through him.

“Detective Decker!”  Lucifer shouted, holding his now bleeding hand.  “So good of you to finally join the party.  We found ourselves a murderer!”

Chloe, who seemingly had just gotten out of her car, pointed her gun at Johnson and the man slowly dropped the gun on her orders.

“Benjamin Johnson, you’re under arrest for the murder of James Moren.”  Chloe immediately went into arrest mode and got Johnson dealt with.

“Man, I don’t know how you do what you do but today I am so glad you can.”  Dan said, breathing a sigh of relief.  “Shit, man, you’re bleeding.”

Lucifer grimaced, his hand practically on fire.  And he knew how that felt.

“I will be perfectly fine, Daniel.”  Lucifer dismissed.  “Just need a quick trip to Lux and it’ll heal.”

“We should call a paramedic.”  Dan said, pulling out his phone.

“Daniel, I assure I have everything I need at Lux.”  Lucifer said.  “Maze can stitch me up if need be, and I doubt it’ll even scar.”

Dan hesitated.  “I didn’t know Maze was certified in medical services.”

“Maze has been taking apart and putting people together in odd ways for practically her entire life.”  Lucifer said, trying to gloss over the whole torture bit.  He found humans didn’t understand and most certainly didn’t approve of torturing other human souls, and he knew Maze considered Dan to be one of her humans just as he did.  “She knows how to stitch something small like this up.”

“At least let me help.”  Dan said, pulling his handkerchief out of his pocket, the one he often used for picking up evidence, and wrapped it around Lucifer’s hand to try and stem the bleeding.  “That should at least keep you from bleeding out until you can get home.”

“Thank you, Daniel.”  Lucifer said, unused to this kindness.  “I shall replace this straight away.”

“Eh, it’s not a big deal.”  Dan shrugged, tying the ends in a small knot.  “It’s like a buck, I get them cheap because I buy them at Walmart.  They’re not exactly as classy as yours are.”

“Nevertheless, I shall replace yours.”  Lucifer insisted.  “I… appreciate your efforts.”

“Thanks, man.”  Dan smiled at him, a non-mocking genuine one.  It made Lucifer feel strange, like his heart had found someone he didn’t want to let go of.  Previously, he’d only felt this for Chloe, and a different version of it for Maze.  It seemed his heart wanted Dan to be apart of his flock, whether Dan was a douche or not.  He wasn’t sure what to do about that.

“I’ve got everything here, you two alright?”  Chloe asked.  “Lucifer, your hand.”

“I shall be fine, Detective.”  Lucifer assured her.  “Has Mr. Johnson confessed?”

“Yep.  Just a sad, angry, little man who got jealous and had a gun.”  Chloe sighed.  “Do you want to head home?  Your hand looks bad.”

“I would appreciate a ride to Lux, thank you Detective.”  Lucifer said.  The sooner someone drove him home, the sooner he could get away from Chloe’s influence and the sooner his hand would stop pulsating from pain.  “Until next time, Daniel.”

Dan gave his goodbyes as Chloe and Lucifer headed to her car.

The next week, when Dan came in for his shift, he found several handkerchiefs, ranging from dollar store cheap material to material he had to stop himself from rubbing on his face it was so soft.  There was no note, but he knew they were from Lucifer.  After all, Lucifer had always been a man of his word.

Author’s Note

Just so everyone knows, I won’t be posting tomorrow as I have already done six.  I will be reblogging it though.

PS Can Anyone Tell Me How To Make A Linebreak In This Thing

Oh!  Almost forgot. AO3 Link- https://archiveofourown.org/works/20914988

Rewatching Lucifer and I forgot how gorgeous Tom Ellis’s eyes are like they are so expressive and deep it’s insane

When Lucifer says goodbye to his mom in the s2 finale it will always get me 😭

I love how Lucifer’s big thing is following your desires but the moment it comes to Chloe that doesn’t apply anymore

Lucifer is definitely one of my favorite shows but I can tell you now that I fucking hate Maze. I don't get why she does half the shit she does. Ever since season 1. Shes so confusing. And then season five lucifer comes back and she's mad that he didn't take her with when she said herself she didn't want to serve him anymore. Lucifer was right when he said she could've just asked amenadiel ?????? Ugh what the actual fuck.

Is anyone else stalking the news for the possibility of a season 6 of Lucifer even though season 5 isn't out yet? Or is it just me?

Lucifer: I know we don’t get along with each other but I got you a bath bomb for your birthday. So whenever you’re feeling stressed just fill your bathtub with water and drop this in. I guarantee all your worries will be over

Dan: [opens the bag]

Dan:

Dan: this is a toaster

Chloe: we're going to need a really dumb plan to get out of here alive

*everyone looks at Lucifer*

Lucifer: I agree. What's your plan, Daniel?

me @ lucifer (s1): you think youre jealous but really you just wanna fuck them both

ok listen i KNOW chloe and luci will end up together and im more then fine with that but its just so dissapointing that dan lucifer and chloe have this amazing dynamic going rn (s1) and yeah they could ALL be together me thinks