Esme Gigi Genevieve Squalor - Tumblr Posts

I can confirm this is true.

Esme squalor stans this is exactly how you sound I’m saying this with love

asoue asks: 4, 20, 21?

4. Spend two days inside a fountain or two days inside a cage in the bottom of an elevator shaft

Inside a cage in the bottom of an elevator shaft, I don’t mind the dark and it would be much less cold and wet than a fountain.

20. Get adopted by Hector or Jerome

Jerome. He’s rich, has VFD connections and would let me do whatever I want. Oh, and he’s married to Esmé.

21. Adopt the Baudelaires or the Quagmires

I want to adopt them all but I just feel like the Baudelaires have more personality.

Finally starting Woevember!!

My Baudelaire Fire theory:

Following Esmé’s marriage to Jerome, the Baudelaire parents considered calling a temporary truce with the other side of the schism. They invited her over to negotiate (this was why they sent their children away). They were sitting round the table drinking brandy, and Esmé, being a firestarter, didn’t use a coaster. Little did they know that she had placed some sort of device outside intended to set the building on fire, which didn’t work due to the weather. She got angry, which made the Baudelaire parents suspicious. Esmé excused herself, left the room, and set fire to the building from the inside. She then left via the secret passageway. The Baudelaire parents, smelling smoke, go to investigate, but only Beatrice manages to get out before the passageway is blocked (somebody later removes whatever fell on it). Beatrice hides in the fountain. Lemony does not actually believe that she is dead, but pretends she is in order to protect her. VFD faking her death is the reason Lemony is ‘forbidden to speak to her’ like he mentions in TAA.

fuck personality tests, who have you got set for your Netflix profile pic?

Count Olaf and Esme going to a movie with their 4 "children" and then the second twin sneaking later posing as the first

Seven tickets for Barbie please