First Person POV - Tumblr Posts

The flashlights illuminate our way as we walk towards the old carousel. No one has been in the old mall off of I-82 in years. People say that the old place is haunted. But I think they’re all being dramatic

The dust grows thicker the closer we get to the carousel. We can barely see two feet ahead of us. My heart begins to beat faster with every step I take. I glance left and right, afraid that something is going to jump out from the dark and grab me. ‘Calm down. It’s just a silly story Nana told you to scare you.’.

The dust breaks revealing the old carousel that brought many generations of the people in this town joy. I look at my surroundings and notice that the dust encircles the carousel like a barrier. ‘How odd.’.

“This is boring. Let’s go-”. “Why don’t you take a ride? You’ve come all this way.” I whip my head around searching for the source of the sounds. “Meredith? Is that you?” “Meredith is waiting for you Teddie. Why don’t you join her?” My heart rate speeds up dramatically. Sweat begins to run down my face as I feel tears well up in my eyes from fright. “This isn’t funny Meredith!” I yell to what seems like nothing.

A child-like giggle echoes throughout the empty mall as I spin in a circle out of fright.

Creak creak creak. The noise makes me freeze and turn my gaze to the carousel in front of me. A bright spotlight shines on the carousel as it turns with no operator. Broken music plays from the old speakers add to my fear.

The carousel finally stops turning and the light goes out. “Help…me…” a coarse and ragged voice emanates from the carousel. The light returns but is brighter than it was previously, it focuses on the horse right in front of me. My eyes adjust and my body breaks down as a guttural scream erupts from my body.

Strings were tied around Meredith’s wrists and they had been maneuvered into position that made her hands seem like they were holding the pole that connected the horse to the rest of the ride. A frilly pink dress took the place of her original clothing to illuminate the feeling of her being a young girl. Bows decorated her once straight, now curled, hair. Stockings adorned her legs and a pair of Mary Janes were on her feet. But her face was the worst of it. Her lips had been stretched to the point of a permanent smile and her eyelids had been sewn open so that she could never close them.

The light disappeared and the carousel began to spin again. But it spun faster with every turn it took. Soon it had become a blur and created a small gust of wind. I stood up and began to run away from the carousel as music began to play and echo. “Why are you running Teddie? Don’t you want to ride the carousel? Meredith has been waiting for you.” The voice calls out to me as I run as fast as I can to the exit. Shadowy tentacles begin to come after me as I reach the exit. “LEAVE ME ALONE!” I scream just as the tentacles reach me. With a final leap I make it out of the abandoned mall.

I keep running to make sure that the shadows can’t reach me. When I finally stop to catch my breath I process everything that just happened. Tears begin to fall as I remember what happened to Meredith.

“Why did you leave Teddie? I thought you wanted to ride the carousel?” Alarm bells start to ring in my head as the voice begins to speak to me. I feel something cold wrap around my ankle and drag me. My head hits the ground and I fall unconscious.

Third person narrative is my enemy

Last 1200 words in third person today, feeling like some weirdo creeping on my characters.

Brain quietly decides NO. Switches to first person without me consciously realizing it.

Sigh.

I’m convinced that fanfic authors who write in first person pov WITHOUT making it sound weird are the rarest types of authors.

Please reblog for sample size

Writing Tips Pt. 11 - Points of View

So tense involves whether a story is narrated in the past, present, or future relative to events. But what about the POV, or point of view? I've seen a lot of confusion about this, especially among novice writers, so I'll try to clarify what they are.

Imagine you're standing in a crowded space, having a conversation with your reader. You're telling them a story, making you the narrator.

If you are the main character of the story, that is First Person POV. You will use "I/me" pronouns.

If your reader is the main character, that is Second Person POV. You will use "you" pronouns.

If one of the other people around you is the main character (not you and not your reader), that is Third Person POV. You will use "he/she/it/they" pronouns.

So the POV is relative to who the main character is.

Obviously, not every first person POV is going to be literally about you. But they will be told as if you, the narrator, are the one experiencing events. The main thing to remember with such stories is that your viewpoint character needs to be interesting or likeable enough to keep the reader's attention. No one is going to want to read an entire story with a flat, boring, or extremely unlikable viewpoint character. It's also easy to get enmired in the character's thoughts a little too much and forget to tell the story.

Of the three POVs, second person is probably the trickiest to write well, and is not normally encountered in fiction, but it isn't completely unheard of. Classic Choose Your Own Adventure books are written in second person to facilitate the conceit that the reader is the one experiencing the story, the main character. The Monster at the End of This Book, The Book With No Pictures, and other similar books for children that have interactive elements also work well, with the narrator or narrating character talking to the reader throughout the story. Self-help books and other articles will frequently use second person POV as well, as does fanfiction that puts the reader in the main character's shoes in order to ship them with a character.

Now, you may have heard of limited and omniscient POVs, specifically for third person. I've heard different ideas of what each of these mean, or how to use them, with a lot of misconceptions, so let's try to clear that up.

Third person limited POV is limited to one character's thoughts and feelings at a time. Think of it as riding in that person's head. You can hear their thoughts, know their feelings, but you don't know what's going on inside any other character's head. You learn what the main character learns, but if someone else is keeping secrets from them, you won't know those secrets. Limited POV is good for drama because it's easier to keep the reader from knowing things they shouldn't. This POV still allows you to use a character's "voice" in the narration, as with first person POV, just with third person pronouns.

Emily scrubbed the dishes with increasing vigor, glaring daggers at John over in the dining room the whole time. It's like he doesn't even care that I'm angry, she thought, dropping another handful of forks into the drain tray with a rattle. Staying out all night, not a word about where he's been or what he's been up to. And who needs that many shipping boxes anyway? Her thoughts spiraled away from her.

With this POV, you can stick with one viewpoint character for an entire work, or you can change as often as needed for the purposes of your story, but it's best to keep such changes at scene and chapter breaks to avoid confusing your readers.

Third person omniscient POV is aware of all characters' thoughts and feelings as needed. Omniscient means "all-knowing." The narrator of this story might tell us what a few characters are feeling, or inform us of a bit of backstory for a newly-introduced character without necessarily riding inside that character's head. Many older works of fiction were written in this style. This is arguably the simplest POV to write, and yet also the easiest to mismanage.

Many authors make the mistake of trying to write third person omniscient by constantly changing which character's head we're in. This is called head-hopping, and can cause literary whiplash for your readers as you keep bouncing around from one character to the next. One way to avoid this pitfall is to avoid getting so deeply into any character's head that you're writing out their actual thoughts. Create more distance between the narrator and the characters.

Emily scrubbed the dishes with increasing vigor, glaring daggers at John over in the dining room the whole time. Her thoughts jumbled about as she mused over where he might have been the night before, where he might have been every night for the past three weeks, and what all those shipping boxes that arrived every day might contain, unaware that John had been meticulously planning a surprise party for her—one that was about to go horribly awry, all thanks to assumptions and lack of communication.

In this example, you can see where I distanced myself from Emily's direct thoughts, so that it wouldn't be as jarring when I also shared John's side of things, along with a little narrative foreknowledge that neither of our characters could conceivably know at this point in time. I am by no means an expert in third person omniscient—I prefer limited for my writing—so I highly recommend checking out guides online for better examples on how to do it right.

One last thing: as with tense, it's important to be consistent, but that doesn't mean you absolutely must stick to one POV for your entire story. Perhaps you want to switch characters periodically, but you want one character's chapters to be in first person POV. Perhaps you want to include letters written between two characters as interlude chapters and thus need to switch to second person. Perhaps one person is literally a deity and thus has a more omniscient viewpoint in their scenes. This is fine, but be consistent within the guidelines you have set for your story. If Emily's scenes are written third person limited, don't switch to first person for one scene.