Geto Suguru Angst - Tumblr Posts

eating, starving

3k • teen • satosugu • part 4: April

“What’s it like, swallowing curses?” Suguru doesn’t answer at first. He doesn’t really want to think about it, but Satoru isn’t that easy to shake. “My technique? You’ve seen it.” “Well, sure, but there’s a lot I can’t see.” Suguru sighs. When he shakes his head, the whisper-fine tips of Satoru’s hair tickle his jaw. “That’s a landmark confession, coming from you.” “Is it?” Satoru snorts like a heathen. He’s so unserious. That alone is enough to dredge up a smile, somehow, with no regard for Suguru’s sour mood. He feels toyed with when that happens. Satoru is a little too good at getting what he wants. “I mean, what is it like for you?” Suguru hasn’t ever tried to explain it. It’s second-nature, really. But he’s picturing it now, feels it coming up like a bad breakfast, this force he can’t resist. He’s picturing it, so he may as well try and find the words. “There’s this… pull.”

Suguru consumes curses for a living and pretends it doesn’t keep him up at night. Satoru knows that it does and tries his best to help.

(Set in April 2006, 4 months before the Star Plasma Vessel incident. Series part 4 of 12.)

[Read the fic on AO3]

all too well g. suguru

pairings: geto suguru x fem! reader (satoru x reader maybe?)

cw: lovers to exes, depression, i used suguru's eye color in the manga, angst, self-sabotage, fighting (satoru and suguru), mentions of blood, cutting of hair, i used suda manami for the plot sorry 😔, crying, a lot of cursing!

a/n: another angst fic hehe sorry :p

maybe you were the problem all along, maybe you forced him to something he didn't want and suguru got tired of you. that must be it. but if you were really the problem, you were willing to change, just for him to go back.

chp 001 - chp 002

how can a person love someone to the point that they couldn't live without them? how could a person like you love someone that you still couldn't forget about them despite being separated for several months already?

geto suguru was supposed to be your high school sweetheart, he was supposed to be the person you'll be with until you grow old. why did a simple argument ended everything? but was it really that simple?

graduating high school, you and suguru decided to stay at a same dorm, not wanting to get separated again. you've started to get to know him more. you found out the things he loves and hate the most. you still remembered when he told you he hates it when you're not around. but now, you wonder if that's still the thing he hates the most.

being in a 4 year relationship with suguru, you've got to know him better. you always notice little changes about his behavior, his attitude and if something is bothering him and you hate the fact that he hid his depression to you very well. he was all happy infront of you and you didn't even know that something was already wrong.

you only found out about it the night he ended everything. he told you he fell out of love. it was sudden, you couldn't even process the words he uttered not until he embraced you, both were speaking in hushed voice, scared that one might break if one raises their voice.

"i'm sorry, but it's best if i'm away from you." he muttered, still embracing you.

"why? am i bad for you?" you said, not returning his almost cold embrace as you lean your cheek on his chest.

"mhm.. i wanted to focus on myself for now." you were speechless and you kept telling yourself that you should say something but everything was stuck at your throat.

say something! you said to yourself.

you felt suguru arms slipped away from you as he stood meters away and smiled at you.

"was i— a burden?" fuck, you were supposed to comfort him! don't be selfish right now.

"no." he answered plainly. "none of this is your fault, it was my decision."

"h-hey, we're in this together, my—"

"stop—" he stopped you before you could even reach him. "please respect my wishes." he said.

"suguru, what's wrong, hm? come on, tell me. i'm sorry was i hurting you? am i being too much? if so, i'll change! i will!.. suguru just— please?.. you're all i have."

a sob left you when he shake his head left to right, you hate how he said those words that broke you and still embraced you to comfort you.

"i'm sorry, i really am but if this continues, i'm afraid i'll break."

"but i'm here, i would love to be with you. your problem is my problem, right?

"you don't understand, (name)."

"tell me, so i could understand." you muttered as suguru pulled away by holding your shoulders.

"you're being stubborn."

"but— you'll be back, right?"

"i don't know." he said as he took his gymn bag on the bed and you stood there, frozen on the ground, lips quivering as you cry. you don't even care if you look miserable in his eyes, because once suguru stepped a foot outside, you know it's all over.

suguru held the door knob on his hand, he wanted to look back but once he did it, it would break down the walls he built himself and would tell you that he didn't mean everything he said, but he couldn't just do that, suguru needs his time alone and it was for the best, for him, and for you perhaps?

"suguru." fuck. he cursed when you called him with your voice breaking, his hand on the door knob tightening. "remember that i love you, okay? if you need something, i'm here, always."

"yeah, thanks."

and it was finally over.

being emotionally attached, it was hard without him by your side. you used to wait for him so you could eat dinner together but now, you can only only stare at the leftover food on the table for hours until you didn't want to eat anymore.

you waited, day and night as you sit on the couch staring at the door as if miracle would happen and he would come in there. you've lost track of time, you think even reality. you couldn't help but wait for him.

none of your or his friends came by to ask if you were okay but you forced yourself to think that everything was all fine because suguru will be back, right? you know he would.

a month passed, you thought you were getting better. you started going out after locking yourself in your room but seeing people around you, you couldn't help but think of the days he was still beside you and decided to just come home. you weren't getting better yet. will you ever be? yes, you eventually will.

winter was your favorite season, you and suguru loved to cuddle with thick blankets around your bodies with a mug of hot choco with marshmallows.

how many months has it been? 7 months? it's not like you're counting. you're doing good now, but the memories were still there.

you were more than ready to see him again, in a high school reunion your old classmates held so you could celebrate christmas together. you hope he will be there.

"i can't find it!" you cursed, already searched every corner of your cabinet and the scarf he gave you wasn't there, you couldn't find it. another curse left your mouth and decided to just wear a random scarf from your cabinet.

-

"i love your hair! it looks so healthy despite being so long!" you closest friend among them, utahime said.

"ah well.." you were cut off when you heard voices from the entrance of the private room of the restaurant.

"they're here." utahime said as she stood up, welcoming your old classmates and your heart increased its pace as you heard a familiar voice.

as you recalled it, none of your friends except his best friend satoru and shoko knew you were dating back then since both decided to be private. his friends were very observant that they found it out themselves.

"yo!" a surprised gasp left your mouth when satoru threw himself on you, his arms around your shoulder as he flexed his blue eyes to you and then he brushed his slender fingers on your hair as you felt heat in your cheeks when he complimented it. "what a nice hair you have, it reminds me of someone." he said.

satoru cleared his throat at he sat properly beside you.

"oi suguru, you did not inform us that you'll bring your girlfriend with you!"

you didn't know if you were taken aback at the words you heard or the way satoru pinched your cheeks, forcing a smile to form.

"what are you doing, satoru?" you said as you caressed your burning cheeks that he pinched.

satoru was about to say something but you stopped him.

"it's fine." you said, mainly assuring yourself as you smile at satoru. it's already been 7 months after all. it would be a surprise if suguru doesn't have someone new knowing that he have the looks.

shoko sat to your opposite as they trap you in the middle.

"where the hell have you been these past months?" shoko said, trapping you on her arm as she grind her finger in your hair. you laughed in response as she finally released you. "so, how have you been?"

"good."

"doesn't look like it."

"i'm fine, let's not talk about it for now." you muttered. "let's enjoy this day."

"alright, talk to me if you need something."

-

being around with your old classmates, you noticed that satoru and suguru weren't in good terms. when did it happened? they were literally roasting each other the moment everyone sat on their own seats.

"they fought, 3 months ago." shoko whispered to you as if she just read your mind.

"what happened?" you asked as shoko shrugged.

"i only found them beating each other and when i was about to ask them, they left."

you look away from satoru and did not expect to see purple eyes looking at you, but he was quick to avert his gaze.

you gulped the lump in your throat as you stare at the same scarf you were looking for, wrapped around his new girlfriend's neck. her pink hair looking good with the pink with white tip knitted scarf. maybe it was just identical to the one he gave you, right?

-

the reunion was still a long way but you couldn't be in the same room with him anymore. earlier, you were too excited, even more than ready to see him again but now, you just wanted to be away from him.

"shoko." you yelled at your friend's ear, the loud sound of the karaoke draining your energy as shoko leaned her ear close to your mouth. "i'll be leaving now, i'm getting dizzy with the loud noise." you said as she prepares herself to stand up. "it's fine, i can go by myself, i already called an uber."

"are you sure?" she said as you nod.

you decided not to inform your other classmates anymore as you left the restaurant, your whole façade finally dropping as you quietly sob whilst covering your mouth.

what did you do to deserve this kind of punishment when you were just loving someone genuinely, was that a sin?

suguru's hair wasn't as long as you remembered it, instead it was cut the same length as his best friend. hair holds memories? what a bullshit phrase. now you just wanted to pull your hair out as you cry.

maybe you were the problem all along, maybe you forced him to something he didn't want and suguru got tired of you. that must be it. but if you were really the problem, you were willing to change, just for him to go back.

you thought waiting for 7 months was enough but do you have to wait more months? even years? of course, suguru was someone you already saw in your future, on the aisle as both of you exchange vows.

7 months has passed you still couldn't move on but suguru? he was there, with someone. he finally moved on from you. you just hope that the 4 years of being together was happy for him.

"hey." you were fast to wipe your tears as the person revealed himself.

"here." satoru said, handing you a handkerchief.

"what is this for?" you forced a laugh as you sniffed, accepting the handkerchief on his hand.

"you okay? i can take you home."

"thanks for the offer, satoru, but i already called an uber." you said as the surroundings went silent and silence made you cry even more.

"i'm sorry." you said, concealing your cries with a laugh as you wiped your tears with the handkerchief satoru gave you.

"why are you apologizing?"

"i look miserable, right?" you joked as you heaved a heavy sigh.

"i should really take you home."

"it's fine, it'll be fine later. i was just surprised." you said. "so, when did they?.."

"3 months ago." satoru answered.

"ah, is that so?" you asked as satoru hummed in response. "i'm happy for him." you said but your voice shaking.

"are you?" satoru teased as both of you laugh. "i'm here, you know." he suddenly said.

"stop joking like that, satoru. suguru is your best friend, i just couldn't betray him like that."

"i'm just joking." satoru said, placing his arm around you, caressing your hair with his hand.

your phone released a sound as you noticed that the uber was already near and satoru pulled away from you.

"thank you, satoru."

"of course. you still have my— and shoko's number right? call us if you need something."

"yeah, thanks again." you said as satoru ruffled your hair.

"there goes the uber." he said as the uber stops infront of you and you were surprised when satoru opened the front door. "take her home safely or i'll beat you up." he said.

"satoru!.. don't mind him mister."

"i'm just kidding." he laughed as you huffed in response. satoru watched as the uber disappeared on his sight as he released the breath he didn't know he was holding.

"so, you're starting your plan now huh?" suguru said as he appeared behind him.

"ha? what plan?" satoru rasped as he placed his hands inside his pockets.

"stop pretending satoru, we both know what you feel for (name). it's your chance now, you can take her, i don't care."

""suguru is your best friend, i just couldn't betray him like that." she said. see how she's still worrying for you? i wonder why an innocent person like her decided to choose a bullshit person like you." suddenly, satoru cheek was met by suguru's fist as suguru held him by his collar.

"say that again!" suguru said but satoru gave the same punch he received as suguru stumbled back a bit.

"hey!" shoko's voice entered their senses as she went between them. "the fuck are you two fighting for again!" shoko yelled but she was being ignored by the two men.

"did you know suguru, i am aware of my bad habits before in high school that's why i let you be with (name) even if it hurts me because i know you are the best for her, i didn't expect you to be like this, come on!"

"stop talking as if you know everything."

"i don't fucking care, i just know that if i had her first, she wouldn't be like this. she was crying, because of you! we didn't even know you broke up with her until we saw you with your new 'girlfriend'."

"then fucking take her!"

"oh i will! just watch, geto suguru."

suguru removed shoko's hand that was gripping his sweater as he wiped the blood on the side of his mouth before going back inside.

"gojo what the fuck?" shoko said.

"forget what you heard, shoko."

"you fucking dumbass! where are you going?"

"leaving this shit reunion."

satoru was supposed to be home but what was he doing in your front door?

he cleared his throat before knocking at the door but minutes already passed, there was no answer.

satoru slumped his shoulders deciding to just leave but then the door was suddenly opened a bit as you peeked.

"satoru? what are you doing here?" you said as you open the door to fully welcome him.

satoru's mouth agape as he looked at you with slightly widened eyes.

"oh this? lovely is it not?" you said as you brushed your fingers with your new short layered hair you cut yourself. you weren't even finished cutting it when you heard a knock on the door.

"yeah, suits you." he said.

"is that for me?" you said, pointing at the plastic of foods on his hands.

"y-yeah, uhm.. shoko wanted to give this."

"really? i'll thank her later!"

"no! i mean- i'll just say it to her."

"okay?.. want to go inside?"

"sure."

-

was cutting your hair made a difference? you think not because even if you cut it already, the pain was still there. maybe you weren't really getting better, maybe not all, not anymore.

all too well g. satoru

pairings: gojo satoru x reader ( past geto suguru x reader )

cw: angst, happy ending c:, some 18+ / suggestive themes! read at your own risk, fake marriage, not proofread haha

a/n: here's the part two of the suguru fic 'all too well'

when your once past lover geto suguru forever disappeared in your life, his best friend satoru was there to the rescue.

chp 001 - chp 002

not in your life you would hear gojo satoru, who himself thinks he's the best person alive, who never let someone get above him said he would let you use him.

that night where satoru watched from your bathroom door as you cut your hair, he didn't stop you, he watched as tears stream down your cheeks. he wanted you to let all of your emotions out while he himself getting hurt from seeing you cry.

satoru stayed with you that night in which you told him because you were scared that you might do something you'll regret.

satoru sat beside you while you lay on the bed, you were holding his hand to make sure he wouldn't leave, but even if you don't hold his hand, satoru swore to himself that he won't leave, not until you told him too.

he didn't want to take advantage of your vulnerability but he just couldn't keep it inside him anymore.

"i'm here (name)." he mumbled.

"i know, thank you satoru."

"that's not what i meant." he responded as it went silent for a minute.

"you know i can't." you muttered as you curl your body into the bed, his hand still holding yours.

"because suguru is my best friend?" he asked and you hummed in response.

"i don't want to hurt him." you said.

"but you'll let him hurt you?"

"it's not his intention, we know that. it's just- maybe i'm just not enough for him.." you said, sadness evident in your voice as you close your eyes.

satoru noticed that you were silent for the past few minutes as he tightened his hand around yours, muttering the words "you're more than enough." without knowing that you haven't fallen asleep yet.

-

after weeks of the reunion, you haven't left your room and there, you realized that you're back to square one and you weren't doing good at all, it was just you forcing yourself that everything would be fine, and despite the now 8 months that has passed, you still couldn't move on.

maybe it was really time to move on. you wanted to but you can't, even if you force yourself to believe that you already have moved on from suguru, your heart will still yearn for him.

despite the months that has passed, suguru's presence was still lingering in your shared home, used to be shared home. you haven't even miss a night without crying.

suguru leaving you really had an impact. maybe it'll take you more months or even years before you could fully move on.

1 year and 7 months, you were counting. suguru was still on your mind but this time, thinking of him doesn't bring tears in your eyes, and instead a smile on your lips as you recalled the memories you had with him. maybe in another universe, it was you and him again. this universe wasn't just for you and him.

his best friends was there to help you, they didn't leave your side especially satoru.

you already reminded satoru that you couldn't reciprocate his feelings and he told you there was no problem with it, as long as you'll let him stay by your side, even just as friends.

-

"so, how's your work? taking over the business already?" you asked as you watched your friend's expression fall.

"yeah, but there's still something they want me to do."

"what is it?"

"it's either i look for someone to be my wife of they'll arrange a marriage for me."

"don't you want them to arrange a marriage for you?"

"i don't want to get married with someone i don't even love." he said with a long sigh, it seems like he's been keeping it to himself for a long time now. satoru looked at you. "i was just thinking if you could-" he paused as he looked away.

"me?"

"yeah, we'll just pretend, though! i can ask someone if you can't."

"sure."

"really?!" satoru didn't mean to sound excited as he sat back on the chair as he cleared his throat.

"think of it as a compensation, for being there with me." you said as satoru nods and he started typing on his phone. "but satoru.." you called him as he looked up at you. "don't get attached."

"yeah.. i promise we'll close the deal once they stopped pestering me about it."

the so-called wedding was private. it was just to show satoru's parents that he's now married and can finally take over to the business. they didn't even mind if you were a no one.

you and satoru ended up on a beach after the wedding, laughing and celebrating as he finally got the title CEO of the gojo company.

"so how does our ceo satoru feels right now?" you teased as satoru chuckled.

"i am not here without your help, (name)." satoru said.

"same for you." you responded as both of you sat on the sand, watching the sun set over the horizon. "i wonder where i am right now if i didn't have you and shoko around." call satoru delusional but he thinks your voice stopped at the 'if i didn't have you' part.

"satoru?" you called him as he snapped out of his thoughts.

"sorry, what was it again?"

"i said i think it'll take months for your parents to forget about this. what's our plan then?"

"just stick with me, that'll be enough."

-

staying in the same roof with satoru wouldn't be bad, right? you're friends, there was nothing wrong with it. but.. why does this feel wrong?

"satoru.." you mumbled as you placed your palms on his bare chest with both of his arms beside your head completely trapping you on the bed. "you're drunk."

" 'm not." he mumbled, giving your lips another peck before staring at your eyes again. it was mesmerizing how his blue eyes shine in the dark.

he kissed you again, but this time it was long that it made both of you catch your breaths.

it feels wrong but you didn't want to stop.

satoru slid the strap of your nightwear off of your shoulders as he inhaled your scent.

"you smell so fucking good." he rasped as his breath tickled your neck.

"satoru." you called him with a concerned tone as he look up at you.

there were hesitation in your eyes and satoru was starting to sober up.

"shit." he cursed as he stood up from the bed. buttoning his polo as you slid your strap back on your shoulder. "i'm- fuck my head hurts.. i'm sorry." he said.

"satoru." you called him again as he stopped his movements. heat crept up on his cheeks when you crawled closer to him, placing your hand on his frozen ones that was on his belt. "i want it." you murmured as you cringe at your choice of words.

"stop, or i wouldn't hold back anymore." he mumbled as he turned around, palming the forming tent on his slacks.

"i don't care." you said, almost whining as you pulled the hem of his polo. "i need you, satoru." you said as satoru once again, unbuttoned his polo and gently pulled you down on the bed.

"you started this." he rasped, taking your lips on his.

and the rest was history.

the next day, both decided to just forget what happened last night. he was intoxicated with alcohol and you didn't have enough self-control. it was a drunken mistake that you and satoru promised it wouldn't happen again.

how ironic when you're the one who said not the get attached but here you were, looking forward for satoru's presence after his work, cooking breakfast for him like how a 'wife' should and preparing a perfect suit for his meetings.

there was no doubt in it, you were definitely attached or rather, in love with gojo satoru. you love how he respects your wishes and never force you into something you didn't want. that's what you love about him.

you were finally attached but, satoru was back to his old habits.

the lipstick stains on his clothes and the smell of another women's perfume were enough proof.

ever since that night happened, sometimes satoru was distant but sometimes he wasn't, it was confusing your poor heart plus it was just a deal between you and satoru, you weren't in the position to get jealous because first of all, you were also the one who said not to get attached.

it really hurts to love, is it not?

-

"what do i do, shoko? i'm in love but-"

"but you still love suguru?" she cuts you off but suguru didn't even occurred in your mind.

"no.. i already moved on from suguru." you said but why were you hesitating?

"satoru's a jerk, he's back on his old habits, you should just end the deal. he already got the ceo position, why are you still staying?"

truth is you still didn't want to end what you have with satoru. but what exactly do you have with satoru? what are you to him?

"why did i have to fall in love at the wrong time?" you asked yourself as you grip your hair in annoyance.

shoko puffed a smoke as she threw the cigarette on the ground before stepping on it with the tip of her heels.

"tell him how you feel." shoko said and you were more than surprised at her suggestion. "that's the only way you'll now if you have to stay or not. don't hurt yourself more (name). suguru is enough, don't let satoru do the same thing."

"okay, i will."

-

you told satoru that you'll stay in your apartment for a week.

you were ready to spill out your emotions but the moment you faced satoru, you chickened out and left, though there's a single thing you noticed about him, satoru is avoiding you. he was quick to dismiss you as if he was in a hurry. he couldn't even meet your eyes when you're talking.

you couldn't stay in your apartment alone anymore and it's only been 2 days since you left, so you went back to your 'home' or rather satoru's penthouse and..

you were met with a lady on the door of his room, the only thing that was covering her body was his shirt.

you gulped the lump on your throat as you felt a presence behind you.

"(name)?.." satoru said in disbelief as he stopped wiping his wet hair with a towel, immediately closing the door to hide the woman.

"h-hey, um, i was just.. i-" you were stuttering as you look around, thinking of any reason that was enough for satoru to believe. "i came back to get something and noticed the door was locked."

"is that so? what was it?" satoru asked as he pulled you towards the living room.

"i forgot i already have it." you said as you look at the door of his room and satoru's forced cough caught your attention. "i'll be leaving now." you said as you walked past him.

"wait." satoru said as he stopped you and held you by the wrist but you were more surprised at your movements when you harshly slapped his hand away. "i can explain." he said as you lightly laugh, observing the fresh hickeys on his collarbone.

"there's no need, satoru." you said in an almost shaky voice as you sucked up a breath. it was just a deal between you and him. satoru was free to do what he wants and that goes the same for you.

"i'll be leaving now." you repeated and this time, satoru didn't stop you. he couldn't even look at you as you leave and you were hoping he would chase you but in the end, he didn't.

-

you leaned your forehead on the steering wheel as you cry. loving someone should feel like you're free but why was it suffocating you?

you took your phone as you called shoko, the only person left you can trust.

"shoko.." you said, voice breaking.

"what's wrong? did that bastard rejected you?" shoko's distress can be heard on her voice as you sniff.

"no.." you responded.

"why are you crying?"

"there's- a woman on his house."

shoko's heels can be heard as she walked back and fourth inside her clinic.

"what should i do, ieiri? i'm lost." shoko bit the end of the cigarette as she harshly threw it on a trash bin. "i should end the deal here, shoko. or it'll just hurt me more."

"that's right." she agreed as she grumbled. "that bastard."

"don't blame him, ieiri. it's my conditions in the first place. i told him not to get attached but, here i am."

"end the deal." shoko said. "you can't right?"

"i- of course i can."

"alright then. that's the only solution (name), everything should stop before you further hurt yourself."

it was a surprise when satoru was the first one to end the deal. he asked you to come home 2 days after the incident.

"i'm not ready to let you go yet." he said, or maybe joked. "thank you for putting up with me for a year." satoru said as he laughs.

"silly, you can just call me again if you need something."

"thank you (name), really. is there something you want me to help you with?" something? you don't know. maybe mend your broken heart? you chuckled to yourself. as if he could.

"nope, all good. how about you?"

"nothing. so i guess this is it?" he sighed as you nod. "ah right, i apologize you had to see that." satoru said as you nod in acknowledgment.

"(name)."

"satoru."

you both said at the same time.

"o-oh, you go first." you said.

"if you ever need someone to lean on, i'm here, and shoko. of course."

"i know." you responded with a smile as you stand up from the couch. "i'll just get my things if i'm free."

"don't worry i can ask my people to take it for you."

"that would be a great help." you said as satoru stand up too as he opened his arms.

"this is gonna be our last hug as a married couple and we're back on being friends." he said as you laugh.

"i'll be going now then."

"how about one last kiss then." satoru joked and already expected you to only laugh at him but instead, he felt your lips on his cheek and suddenly, you were at the door.

"see you, satoru." i love you

how long are you gonna stay at this phase? curled up in your bed and tears in your eyes as you lose track of time.

a week passed since the deal finally ended, your phone having a lot of missed calls and unread messages from shoko, even satoru.

you sniffed as you sit up from the bed. it feels like years since you drank a water and ate a good food.

you neatly folded your blanket as you went to the kitchen.

luckily, you weren't in a worse state like when suguru left but your heart still ached as you prepare to boil a hot water for a morning coffee.

you went to the bathroom and the first thing that caught your eyes was a scissor, the very same one you used to cut your hair 2 years ago.

your hair has grown now, maybe it was finally time to cut it again.

you took it in your hand, preparing yourself to cut it but then the scissor was snatched from your hand, the noise of the boiling water reached your ears as you perked up.

"satoru? what are you-" a surprised gasp left your mouth when he suddenly embraced you.

"i love you (name). i love you so much." he said between his panting breath as he held your shoulders for you to face him.

"what are you doing here? why are you sweating?" you asked, unintentionally wiping his forehead with the sleeves of your sweater.

"listen to me (name)."

"satoru, don't even start." you said as you pushed him out of the way, going back to the kitchen to turn off the stove as he followed behind.

"i love you (name)." he repeated and your heart ached.

"what is it that you need, satoru?" you sighed as you faced him. his expression falling didn't go unnoticed by you.

"did you think i'm saying this because i need something from you?" he said as you look away from him.

"isn't that the reason why?" you muttered, looking away from him.

"ever since we became seatmates back in high school, i started feeling something for you but i wasn't in my right mind that time and you liked suguru. i've been waiting (name), for 7 years. i've always wanted you." he said as he reached for your hand and you let him. "be mine, please?" he begged.

"i can't.." you muttered.

"is this about suguru again? (name), it's been 2 years, you have to-"

"it's not about that!" you exclaimed, cutting him off as you slide his hand away from yours. "i'm just scared that i'll just end up getting hurt again." you said, voice breaking as you wiped the tears that managed to fall.

"i could never." satoru mumbled. "i could never hurt you." but you already did. you wanted to tell him but it was useless anyways.

"why me satoru? there's a lot of women out there who's good for you. i'm not good for you, not for suguru, not for anyone."

"you are good for me. you were the reason why i changed. please, give me a chance, just once. i will prove it to you that we deserve each other."

"you've already touched a lot of woman, how can you prove that you already changed?" you asked and he was left speechless.

"i'll do what you want, anything." he said.

"anything?" you asked as he nods.

"what if i told you to just leave me be." it was a test, you were testing him.

"well.." he paused. "if that's what you want." he said as you released a breath you didn't know you were holding.

"then leave-"

"but know that i won't give up that easily." he said. "i've already waited for years, why would i wait for more when you're already within my reach?" he said as he motioned you to face him, your eyes landing on the fading hickeys on his neck.

"i thought about you." he said as you met his eyes.

"what?"

"i couldn't fuck any other woman without thinking of you." he confessed, your cheeks heating up at the choice of his words. "that woman you saw, we didn't do anything, i swear."

"why are you telling me?"

"because i want you to trust me."

"what if one day, you broke my trust." you asked.

"that wouldn't happen." he said.

"but if you do, i wouldn't have it in me to trust you again." you said as he frantically nods and embraced your from behind.

"i was even scared to face you if shoko didn't slap it in my face. she told me everything, but-"

"but?" you asked when he suddenly went silent.

"i wanted to hear it from you."

"you wanted to hear what?"

"that you love me." he said, poking your side a surprised laugh leaving your lips. "come on."

"i don't." you said as you pushed him by his chest and you felt bad when he frowned and looked down. he looked like a lost puppy.

"fine! i'm in love with you, gojo satoru!" you huffed as his faced lightened up.

"i love you too!" he exclaimed and embraced you.

after a minute of hugging, satoru pulled away as he took your hand, slipping the same ring you used to wear for your so-called wedding.

"let's get married again, but this time, not for a deal." he said as you look at the ring to him. "i love you (name), more than you've ever know. you don't have to say it back. say it when you're ready."

"okay." you said as he smiled at you. "i love you too, satoru."

"heh, i sure will invite suguru in our wedding to show him that it's his lost." he said before pulling you close and kissed you and this time with no regrets.

tags: @mandysfanfics @r0ckst4rjk @aikori6 @vomitingmoth @tojisworm-5 here's part 2 :pp

✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。IN YOUR ARMS (I’M WARMEST) — GETO SUGURU.

contents. it’s a bit of a prequel to this drabble about the shower scene, but can be read as a stand alone, post hidden inventory arc, depressed suguru :(, small spoon suguru bc he deserves to be held, reverse comfort, established relationships, healing suguru agenda !! i’m passionate about this agenda !!!!!!!

usually, instead of you sneaking into suguru’s room, it’s the other way around. usually, he slips under your sheets and curls around your body, your combined giggles seeping into the sheets as he sneaks in a few hours of sleep with you in his arms before he inevitably has to leave before he’s caught.

tonight is different, though—suguru hasn’t come to your room to sleep with you in more than a few days. you don’t even think he even sleeps anymore, if the dark circles under his eyes are of any hint.

so you do the only thing you can think of: sneak into his room.

“hey, are you asleep?” you poke his shoulder—he’s had his back facing the door since you stepped in, and he’s made no move to face you.

“yes,” is all he says.

“wow,” you roll your eyes, “i’m risking a lot of wrath with yaga to be here, y’know. least you could do is face me.”

“you should sleep,” he mumbles, “you have a mission tomorrow.”

“it’ll be easy,” you say wave off, “i’ll be back before lunch time. we can eat together,” you offer.

suguru has hardly been eating—you notice this instantly. if you’d just get one chance to sit and have a meal with him, you’d force a few bites into him, but it’s been a busy week. for all of you. you haven’t properly seen satoru in what feels like ages—the newest missions he’s been assigned have been much more complex, much more difficult for anyone else but him to handle.

he hasn’t known rest since that day.

suguru is alone more now, on missions and once he’s returned. the gap between him and everyone else feels like it gets wider and wider every day. he’s become more distant, in more ways than one.

“you shouldn’t say that. you never know what happens on a mission,” he says seriously. “be careful.”

the last part, barely, just barely, sounds like a plead.

you sigh, wrapping yourself around his back and pulling him against your chest, slipping a hand under his shirt and rubbing slow circles into his bare skin. he likes the feeling, it’s always soothed him.

“i’m always careful,” you murmur, “i’ll bring you soba on my way back. will you eat for me, sugu? just for me,” you pout theatrically.

suguru is always weak to your dramatics—it’s your appeal. he finds it cute, always gives you a chuckle as he caves and gives you exactly what you want.

this time, he doesn’t offer you so much as a hum.

“if i’m hungry,” he mumbles.

“baby,” you sigh, nose burying into his hair. the strands are slightly knotted—something that suguru never lets happen with his hair. “you need to start looking after yourself more. i’m getting worried about you.”

“you don’t need to worry about me,” he mutters, “you should go and sleep.”

deep down, you know he’s gently telling you to leave. suguru is asking you to leave—but you know if you leave, something might change. something irreversible. so you wrap your arms tighter around him, pull him closer as hold his body against yours.

“i always worry about you. and you should sleep too,” you say simply, “we can sleep together.”

he’s silent.

so you let him stay like that, rubbing over his abs slowly and tracing the skin, writing your name with the tip of your finger lightly so he knows he’s yours even when he acts like he’s alone. you press a kiss to his head, and because he’s still your suguru, he melts just the slightest bit against you.

progress.

“hey,” you whisper, chin resting on his shoulder. you watch his head turn slightly as he looks at you from the corner of his eyes.

“what?” he sighs.

“i’ll take care of you, so you don’t have to, okay?” you promise gently. if suguru can’t find it in him to look after himself, he doesn’t need to—not when you’re here. “we’ll start slow, yeah? tomorrow you’ll shower. and then i’ll feed you.”

“you don’t have to—”

“shh,” you hiss, reaching over to press a finger to his lips, “i’ll bring your favorite, and then i’ll feed you like the princess you are. it’ll be nice, trust me.”

“but—”

“i’ll even give you a kiss for every bite. how does that sound?”

he sighs, hand resting on top of yours as you stay rubbing circles into his skin.

“good,” he whispers, “sounds good.”

“i love you, baby,” you kiss his head again, “i’m sorry i haven’t been here all week.”

“it’s not your fault,” he insists, “it’s…it’s been busy for us all. i don’t mind—”

“i’ll make more time for you,” you say firmly, “i promise. okay?”

you’re not sure if you imagine it, but you think his exhale might be a little shaky. and then he nods against you, leaning back so his body is pressing into yours even further. you wrap your arms tighter around him and pull the sheets until they’re under his chin, making sure he’s covered all the way.

it’s cold in his room at night—you can’t always make it warmer, but you can try to share your heat.

“okay,” he says after a while, “i’ll shower tomorrow.”

“good,” you nod, “i’ll handle the rest. now get some sleep, yeah?”

he nods—but even as you slowly doze off, sleep doesn’t come to him. but it’s not so lonely to stay up tonight, and the bed doesn’t feel stiff under his back. his hand is still on top of yours, finger tracing lightly over your knuckles.

“i love you too,” he mumbles—you don’t hear it, but he still wants to say it.

it’s a start.

i should just write a progressive series of suguru slowly healing and then we can have teacher suguru bc imagine him writing on a chalkboard with chalk. yeah. it’s okay if you moan at the idea i did too. i won’t judge !!

Starry Night

Sypnosis - Sitting together on a starry night...what could possibly be wrong with that picture perfect scenario?

Pairing - Satosugu x ! Female ! Reader

Warning(s) - mature themes

Word Count - 0.7k

! PIECE BEGINS UNDERNEATH THE CUT !

"'Toru? What are you still doing up?"  

The sitting man jolts, his eyes flickering to you, their bright hue dimming as you cautiously enter the living room, draped in one of his shirts. His legs spread, palms patting once, twice against his thigh in a silent invitation for you – one that you accept without hesitation.  

Your head tucks into the crook of Satoru's neck, nose inhaling his scent and committing it to memory – a pleasant mixture of sandalwood and the Earth. To you, it was comfort, it was a reminder of the home that you had built with him and Suguru.  

"The stars are nice tonight, aren't they?" Satoru comments, his arms looping around your waist, holding you against him and tilting his head to rest his cheek against your hair. You hum against him, eyes flickering to the window.  

Painted against the inky black sky are the stars that you and Satoru often watched together, laid out on a blanket on the front lawn and pointing up at them as if you had never seen them before. It was always cold during those nights, which usually resulted in Satoru tugging you against his chest, your body molding against his like a perfect little puzzle piece.  

You two would lay there for hours, simply basking in the other's presence and staring up at the flickering yellow lights that adorned the sky. Both of your trances were only broken by Suguru's softened voice, scolding you both for being out so late and commenting how you would both likely be sick by morning.  

Only then would Satoru roll up the blanket, helping you stand with gentle hands and allowing you to make your way back to the front door first. Softened aquamarine eyes watch as you beeline for Suguru's opened arms, hugging the raven-haired man and smiling brightly as gentle kisses are laid out over your face.  

"Yeah, they're nice," you mutter offhandedly, biting back the yawn that claws up your throat. Your nose scrunches up, an action that Satoru once teased you for – though he stopped once he received a loving smack from Suguru, one paired with a gentle scolding.  

Satoru hums, his eyes fluttering shut at the warmth that radiates from your body. Your breathing had deepened significantly, a telltale sign that you had fallen asleep against him – likely lulled by the gentle thump of his heart and the even rise and fall of his chest.  

He tilts his head, pressing a gentle kiss against the crown of your head and looping his arms underneath you, lifting you against his chest and standing from the armchair. He couldn't have his darling wife sleep in such an uncomfortable position – you deserved much better than that.  

Satoru walks silently to your bedroom, closing the door with his foot and gently laying you down in the sheets, tugging them around you and smiling gently as you adjust yourself. A content sight falls from your nose, cheek smushed against your pillow as you doze.  

He climbs in beside you, tucking you against his chest and tangling his legs with your own. He blinks once, twice...then allows his tired eyes to finally close, welcoming sleep as it beckons to him with softened hands – hands that felt oddly similar to your own. 

And somewhere across the way, resting on numbed legs and rubbing together cold hands, another pair of eyes watches the stars as they glitter in the night sky. He thinks back to a time where he would have enjoyed the stars – maybe even admired their bright yellow hue.  

But that time is not now, and it is a time that he knows he can never go back to – not after what was said and what was done. Besides, he knew it was for the better. His departure from a domestic life was challenging...he had lost count of the tears that he had shed.  

Tonight was one of those nights where he longed for the warmth of a bed, he longed for those two familiar bodies pressed against his own. He longed for the mornings where he would only half-listen to Frank Sinatra and watch as breakfast was prepared for him. He longed for the two people who had shown him endless care and support...but those two people were nothing but a pained memory.  

Tilting his head up at the stars and at the crescent moon, shaky lips turn upward in a smile – one accompanied by salty tears that drip down his cheeks. His mind flashes images of those he longed for; one with snowy-white hair and the other with the kindest smile.  

"The stars are nice tonight, aren't they?" Suguru mutters to himself, hoping that somehow – someway – maybe you and Satoru would hear him. 

"Cleaning up?" Geto asks with a curious tilt of his head, watching as you lift another framed photograph from your bedside table. You smile, turning on your heel.  

"Yeah, that and I wanted to replace a couple of the pictures," you answer, gesturing to the photo frames lying face up on your bed. Geto follows your gaze, humming thoughtfully. "Want to help me pick them out?" 

Geto smiles, closing the distance between you both and placing a sweet kiss against your forehead. Your arms wrap around his waist, holding him close to you. His eyes wander down to the photograph in your hands – it was one of you, himself, Nanako, and Mimiko.  

Nanako and Mimiko are hanging off of Geto's outstretched arms, their lips turned upward in bright smiles. You're standing just in front of Geto, hands hovering beneath the twin girls just in case either one of them were to fall.  

"Don't replace that one," Geto says suddenly, reaching a larger hand out and taking the frame from you. He smiles at it, then returning it to your hand. You chuckle breathily, stepping out of his embrace and turning to glance at the other photographs you had laid out on your bed.  

"I like that one too. But what about these?" 

You receive no answer. 

"Sugu?" You turn back to where he had been standing, tilting your head curiously. The space he occupied was empty.  

"Mama? Who are you talkin' to?" Nanako peeks her head into your bedroom, her eyebrows pinching together in confusion as she pushes your door open. You still, eyes flickering down to the frame in your hands. Your fingers tighten over it, eyes pricking with tears. "Mama?" 

"Nothin' honey," you reply tearfully, smiling shakily at her as you swipe the backs of your knuckles against your eyes.  

"It was nobody." 

no surprises

cw: angst, geto just makes me so sad bruh idek, post riko arc featuring: suguru geto

a/n: this song is so sad and i feel sad and yeah i dont really know where i was going with this. also i need someone to like super deeply analyze geto and his character and his morals and everything, cuz i don't think i did it right but whatever. lmk how this is !!

"a job that slowly kills you, bruises that won't heal.." ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

'exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume. over, and over, and over again.'

'exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, consume, exorcise, cons-'

"suguru! you got the curse?" you call out.

he slowly turns towards you, a blank look on his face. "yeah."

"hmm.. they don't taste good?" you half-heartedly joke, wiping the curses blood off your hand.

"they're curses, what do you think they taste like?" he questions, tired from the day of missions.

"i don't know, you tell me.." you say, giving him a soft smile.

after he moment of thinking, he responds, "like a rag used to clean vomit."

"oh!.." you pause, "how about we head back?"

wordlessly, he walks past you and heads in the direction of the school's building. .・。.・゜✭・.

"you look so tired, unhappy."

"you okay..?" you ask, as suguru crawls into bed. he never takes more than 15 minutes in the shower, always complaining that you're wasting the water. but recently, he's been in the shower for over an hour. you know that it's a way for him to drown out his worries, but frankly, you feel worried.

he's changed since riko's death. and not for the better.

"long day." he responds, turning away from you.

"hmm.. you wanna talk about it?" you ask, laying down next to him and wrapping an arm around him and pulling him to your chest.

"i'm.." he sighs. "i'm so sick of this. i've had enough of the sorceror life. i know how it'll end."

"it was so much.. pressure. just living. because i was one of the strongest, i had to look out for the weak. i don't get it. humans are the cause of the curses. it''s their own fault. why should we have to protect them from something they caused?! there's no point!"

"i mean, they're causing their own suffering. and i can't stand it anymore."

"i've made up my mind, (y/n).." he sighs, "i'm done."

"well..." you start, "there's always a reason, suguru. i know how you're feeling, and i promise you, it gets better. you just need to pull through."

and he tried, but maybe that wasn't the answer he needed. maybe he didn't need one at all, and just needed someone to listen. because when you woke up, he was gone. and an entire village was massacred.

IM IN LOVE???

contains…established relationship. fem!reader. mutual masturbation. virgin!reader. college au. no curses / sorcerers. reformed player!geto <3. messy making out. cum shot. lovesick!geto (i’m serious). praise. so much fluff. not proofread.

your boyfriend is just so hot.

you have eyes, you have common sense, you have a brain. you’re not oblivious to the stares he gets, and the late-night messages he receives that he’s never once responded to.

you’re fully aware of the countless girls who talk bad about you, whining about how a man such as geto could possibly settle down with a prude like you, and how he’s likely getting what he doesn’t get from you somewhere else.

it doesn’t matter, however.

you know he’s not like that anymore. in fact, he’s far from it.

he’s wrapped around your finger, so whipped you’re practically walking him on a leash at all times. he’s so obviously infatuated with you—that’s why people talk.

he’s in love with you—point blank. he’s incredibly infatuated with his beautiful girlfriend, oblivious to the girls who wantonly text him despite his experiences because, in his mind—if he’s in love, so is everyone else!

the thing is, though, geto has no idea just how similar you two are.

he knows that obviously you love him too, and there is a reason you’re still dating him. but he doesn’t know the entire extent to how much you love him. how much you long for him.

he doesn’t know the nights he’s away, you spend with your thoughts wavering and your mind all foggy.

he doesn’t know you spend your nights apart the same way he does—flushed, aching, and desperate for a release.

it’s not like you haven’t given him any reason to believe you’re sexually attracted to him—you let him know just how handsome he looks all the time. but due to your abstinence, he doesn’t let the compliment spread too far.

he keeps his hands clean, until he can dirty them when you’re apart.

he’s probably a little dense for not realizing you’re just as desperate as he is—there’s just the matter of you being emotionally—or physically, for that matter—ready for such a change in your life.

and if he’s being honest, he doesn’t mind the waiting. there’s a newfound want he’s gained. it’s not the want to get his dick wet, it’s a want to please you.

to make you feel good, to see just what makes your head spin—not his.

you’ve known it from the start that geto suguru will be the man who takes your virginity. but now wasn’t the time—despite how needy your body was reacting to him.

“you’re so—god—annoying,” you pant, lips moving sloppily against his, knuckles growing white from the grip you held on his large t-shirt.

he snickers against your mouth, hand wrapped tightly around your lower waist to keep you pressed below him. you taste so sweet, like the soft serve you were innocently licking just minutes ago that he had absentmindedly asked if he could have a taste of.

it resulted in you childishly eating the rest of the ice cream, claiming there was “no more” he could have. you were giggling about the mess you made, before he assured you there was definitely a way he could still have some.

despite how cold your lips were, he held you tight against his chest, palm cupping your cheek and making a mess out of you desperately.

he’s so painfully good at kissing you. at getting a rise out of you. if you weren’t so scared of the intimacy sex endures, you’d for sure have already done it with him. countless times at that.

he just made you so needy.

“ya should’ve let me have a bite, sweetheart.” he teases, nearly stealing every ounce of your breath and nibbling on your cheeks.

despite the cold sweet was (somehow) still lingering on your tongue, you could feel the sheen of sweat accumulating on your forehead.

he guides his open-mouthed kisses to your neck, wantonly nibbling and sucking on your skin he’s grown to find was sensitive, letting your head topple back while he does so.

your legs were loose where they wrapped around his waist.

“suguru—“ you breathe, mind racing a mile a minute.

he takes a moment to respond, allowing your back to arch and a short whimper part your lips before he pulls away to admire the small purple hickey he charitably made. “what, baby?” he hums, grinning down at his work before leaning back in to pair it with another one.

“what do you do when you get like…really horny?”

he pauses, cutting his new lovebite short before he’s leaning over you again, and this time looking at you in your eyes.

he slides his thumb across your swollen lower lip, fighting a smirk.

“i masturbate.” he says assuringly.

your breaths were still even—still quick. your chest rose each time you inhaled until you exhaled, and the taste on your tongue was a mixture of two things—the ice cream, and your boyfriend.

“and, do you think of me?” you ask.

he’s never told you—mainly because he was always kind of afraid you’d be upset by the fact that he does, indeed.

which, certainly you’d have the right to feel upset. he’s nearly violating your privacy—but then again, he can’t really control his subconscious. it’s not his fault he goes into autopilot as soon as he’s alone with his hand, and the thoughts of his pretty little girlfriend.

he lets out a short laugh, leaking with nervousness, while his eyes waver with maintaining contact.

“well, i mean—“

“because i think of you.” you interrupt, pulling your lower lip between your teeth. your gaze falls to his—how pink and plump they look.

his eyes widen.

“really?” he can’t help but wonder, and that smirk he was fighting had won.

“all the time. every time.” you whine, your knuckles tightening their hold on his shirt.

he could gape, but the sly grin on his face was overpowering. he loved hearing you say that.

“i do too—every time.” he confesses, sliding his tongue across his lips.

he notes the small specks glowing in your eyes, and how your irises grow just a little.

“what do you think about?”

he smiles down at you, raking his mind for every thought he’s had of you—and there were many. he knows just what he thinks about, every single time.

he doesn’t want to walk on eggshells anymore, not after knowing you think of him the same.

“pleasing you. just how you’d react if i did certain things. how you’d sound, look, taste, feel. everything.” he says honestly, sliding his thumb across your cheek.

you couldn’t deny the heat that spread to your face, and just how dryer your throat has gotten. but more specifically, just how dizzy your head had grown.

“what about you? what do you think about?” he asks before you can say anything in response.

you lick your lips, a small chuckle leaving to fan his cheek. “what it’d be like. how you’d feel, and make me feel.” you murmur, flattening your hand against his chest.

he couldn’t deny the way his ego—already overflowing—grew at your words. he knows about his large sexual history, and how people think of him, but this confession instantly made it to the top of his list. he might never forget it. especially since it’s you admitting it.

he can’t help but grin at the image, because he knows he’d make your first time worth your while. worth all of the time he’s patiently waited—and how much longer he’ll wait ahead.

you sigh, gliding your hands up his chest to link around his neck.

“god—i just want to do it. get it over with. you make me crazy,” you admit, chuckling quietly while keeping your gaze set on his lips. “but i can’t yet. i just—i don’t know why. i just can’t.”

he smiles, sliding his palm down the side of your face, brushing short pieces of hair from your eyes before he cups your cheek.

“and i’d never ask you to. i’m happy with waiting, my love. just being in the same room is enough.” he reassures, and despite deep down knowing this, you couldn’t help the feeling of a weight being lifted from your chest.

you swallow nervously, trying your best to ignore your hands which were growing weak and your stomach which was starting to tighten due to a lack of friction your core has been craving for a few minutes now.

“and—but i’m just so horny right now. i’m so—i need you.” you whine, your breaths picking up and chest heaving against his.

he lets his hand that was tight around your waist loosen a little, cupping your waist and looking at you deeply. he almost groans at your words, something he’s never heard come out of your lips.

“what do you want me to do?” he asks, lowering to press a deep kiss to the opposite cheek he was holding, and then another one to your jaw.

you chew on your lower lip, clearly contemplating something in your mind with the way your eyebrows furrow and your gaze wavers. your body was flushed, hot and sticky underneath your clothes—combining with his weight and warmth over you.

you carefully press your hand against his shoulder, using small force until he gets the message and confusingly lifts himself from you, crawling back onto the cushion of the couch that wasn’t occupied.

“i, just—“ you begin to stutter, your sparkling eyes flickering with a certain want—a need—that geto has never seen before and he feels himself swell in his sweats.

“i want you…to, just—“ you trail off again, sliding your pink tongue across your plump lips and he finds himself staring.

that is, until your knees that were previously pressed together slowly begin to separate, and his eyes subconsciously fall to your hand that is weaseling it’s way down your clothed body.

his eyes instinctively widen, watching your dainty and nimble fingers disappear between your shorts and underwear, and the moment your lips part and you gasp ever-so-quietly—he feels his body light on fire.

oh god, you were touching yourself.

right in front of him.

he feels like he might go crazy, the way your head tips back to dangle over the armrest, and the way your chest heaves as your hand picks up its pace.

he wonders why you tilted your head back. is it just a reflex, is that how you always react? or is it to hide your face which is undoubtedly on fire, and avoid eye contact with the man who’s nearly about to short circuit in front of you?

a little part of you is probably embarrassed. but why pay attention to that right now when he makes you act like this? when he gets you so worked up?

“nghh—” you whimper, and geto’s hand moved all on his own. he wraps his hand around his length through his sweats, his eyes lidding when looks at you.

“fuck,” he moans your name, half-trying to get your attention and half-subconsciously just talking. your teeth nibble on your bottom lip when you lower your chin, fragile gaze growing a little more confident when you see just what you’re also doing to him.

when you get to see how you make him feel every time he sees you. he’s never been driven so insane.

your eyes fall to his hand, watching him pump himself through his clothing just like you were doing, before your gaze meets his.

“kiss me.” you mutter, a little more commanding then intended but hey—who’s he to deny?

he surges forward, his free hand cupping and sliding towards the back of your neck as his lips connect to yours.

and it’s so messy. so sloppy, he can immediately taste your saliva. your tongue, so soft and slippery, and there’s moans pushing from your lips while you continue to touch yourself. he makes a silent effort to press himself against you—and the groan he lets out from the feel of your hand rubbing your clit against the back of his nearly makes you laugh around his lips.

“c-can i—do it too?” he stutters, mumbling into your mouth.

you could melt.

“yes—sugu, yeah,” you pant, nodding your head which unlatches your lips. your eyebrows pinch together as the pad of your finger presses against your clit, feeling your wetness soak through your thin pair of underwear.

geto groans, sloppily fumbling with the waistband of his sweatpants before he moves to pull them down his legs.

he hovers over you again, hand continuing to palm himself through his thin boxers. he keeps his eyes on yours, watching how the grow a little heavier, and your head rolls to the side to rest your cheek against the cushion.

your hand has picked up its pace, and even though he’d never ask—he wishes he knew exactly what you were doing to yourself because whatever it was makes your chest heave, and another desperate whimper push through your lips and fill the steamy, thick air.

“s’it feel good?“ he sighs, dipping his fingers into his boxers to officially give himself some skin-to-skin contact.

you nod, whimpering. “mm, yeah—i’m s’wet.” you moan, fluttering your eyes closed as you sigh.

his head hurts. he’s aching to know just how wet you are. he’s dying to know how it feels.

but he’s a patient man. in fact, just hearing the way you touch yourself is enough.

his cock is throbbing, it almost hurts to grab when he frees himself from his thin restraint, and pumps his hand quickly along his length.

you open your eyes to peek when he lets out a stifled whimper.

your eyes widen at what you see—and not just because his dick is the first real one you’ve ever seen, but because of how large he was.

his hand was so much bigger then yours, and he couldn’t even fit the size of himself.

his angry red tip, throbbing and leaking. he’s so long, and there’s a pretty pale vein running alongside his length that makes you suck in a breath. you wonder how it’d feel inside you.

he didn’t see the way your eyes widen, only the way your hand seemingly picked up speed below your shorts and he slides his tongue along his lower lip.

“y-you’re—“ you whisper, your eyes moving to trail up his physique you’ve already seen a handful of times, until they meet his gaze. “you’re so big.”

he can feel stars in his eyes, his length twitching immediately, while the compliment puffs up in his chest. he wants to reach out, kiss you all over, make it apparent that his lips were against your skin to anyone who’d be nearby.

“yeah?” he chuckles, rubbing his thumb across his slit. you marvel in the quiet whimper that he involuntarily lets out, watching his lips purse together before his foggy gaze meets yours again.

you nod, but before you could say anything you quietly stifle a moan when your fingers roll over your clit in a particular way, causing your breath to hitch and your head to fall back once again.

geto thinks he can watch you forever, with the way your breaths grow staggered, and your clothed chest heaves when you inhale. his vision grows dizzy when he sees the way your eyebrows pinch, and the way you desperately press your teeth into your lower lip to muffle your quiet whimpers and moans.

he wants the image to be burned into his brain forever—because god, this is what you look like when you’re touching yourself. this is what you look like when you’re alone in your bedroom, thinking of him just like he does to you.

he almost feels embarrassed when he can feel the all-too-familiar build up in his lower stomach.

his eyes roll when he lets out a low groan, subconsciously leaning forward and pressing his free hand to the armrest beside you.

“‘m close,” he whines, embarrassingly so because usually he could last much longer—but you made his will fly out the window.

you nod slowly, picking up your pace before a quiet sob of, “m-me too,” wobbles out of your throat.

his eyes warily open at your words. he needs to see your face when you cum. he peeks his gaze down to your hand, and it’s only then when he realizes—he’s actually about to cum.

“where should i—i dunno—“ he’s stuttering, panting while he speaks and he’s surprised it’s even intelligible.

but when you arch yourself a little more, bringing yourself closer into him and your eyes move to meet his—he thinks he might burst right then and there.

or was it when you silently use your other hand to raise your—his—shirt, securing it just under the mound of your breasts to reveal your soft, plump stomach and you look him dead in the eyes when you say, “here. do it on me.”

“what?” he breathes, eyes lidded.

you scoot in closer to him. “cum. on me.”

he doesn’t know exactly what it was that did it for him—the gesture, or your persistence? whatever it was, that was enough for his eyes to roll back and deep, low groan force it’s way out of his throat.

his dark tresses fall around his face, despite the way he kept it in a loose bun. his jaw breaks open, pinched eyebrows and lidded eyes molding across his features the same moment the pumping of his hand staggers.

you moan on your own, nearly grinning under your matching expression when your hand matches the speed of your breaths, and the warm splatter across your stomach is enough to make you finish.

“fuck,” he drawls, voice croaking and head dangling.

your body grows limp, head falling back onto the cushion of your couch. your breaths suddenly become very audible, both yours and geto’s matching as they slowly calm down.

although geto has had countless sexual experiences, this was by far the most intimate thing he has ever done.

he couldn’t stop himself when he leans in to cup your cheek, pressing your warm lips against his and stealing every ounce of breath you had left in your lungs.

your knee presses against his hip, caging him close and pressing his soft lips to yours. you let out a short moan, accepting his endearing kiss despite the fact that you were still trying to catch your breath.

“i love you,” he mumbles, peppering his kisses to your cheek. “y’didn’t have to do that…”

“well it wasn’t really for you.” you snort honestly, smoothing your fingers through his long dark hair. “i needed that.”

his stomach flips, his short kisses never faltering until he raises his chin to plant a longer one right on the middle of your forehead.

“let me get you a towel.” he sighs, using his weakened strength to lift himself off the couch, taking a turn down the hallway where he knew you kept your spare towels in the bathroom. he grabs a small wash cloth, dampening it quickly.

his cheeks were red and flushed, much like the rest of his skin. his forehead was sticky, long black strands sticking to his skin but he paid no mind.

you purse your lips, letting one of your legs lay across the cushions of the couch while the other props next to you, your eyes fall to the rather large, thick, white ropes of cum sitting on your bare stomach. you hardly stifle your chuckle.

something about tipping him over the edge like you did—it made your ego explode.

that’s never happened to you before.

he returns a mere few seconds later with a damp towel in his hand. you allow him to gently wipe it across your own sweaty and flushed skin, leant back against the armrest in peaceful silence.

his soft, smooth hands slide against your dampened stomach, gently pressing his thumb into the plush endearingly.

“are you feeling okay?” he asks, and when you make eye contact you don’t miss the way his pupils grow.

“why wouldn’t i be?”

he shrugs, but inevitably accepts the way your arms open and your knees part to make a slot for him to lay. he presses his face into your upper chest, cheek smushing.

“because you’ve never done anything like that. not with someone else, at least.” his voice comes out a soft mumble. “i just wanna make sure you’re really okay.”

he melts into your loving hold, your legs wrapping around his torso and fingers running through his hair.

“i really am. i love you, suguru—i promise, that was exactly what i needed.” you press a small kiss to the top of his head. “i want to do more, i really do. but—baby steps.”

he gives you a tight squeeze, raising his head to press his cheek into the crook of your neck fondly.

“take as long as you need, my love. i’d never ask you to.” and you know he’s being honest.

his eyes open to lock with yours when he raises his chin. “but i hope you know that if you let me take your virginity, i’m not going to let you just ‘get it over with’.”

you head lulls when you let out a short chuckle, relaying the quote in your head before your hand meets his warm cheek, and you lower your chin just a little to press a kiss to his pink lips.

“when,” you correct. “there’s no other man i’d want to experience my first time with then you, suguru.”

sorry if this is so cheesy and corny and rushed ugh i haven’t posted in so long </3