Internal Development - Tumblr Posts

I can’t be your peace if I am not at peace with myself.

　　 ˚ 　　　 . ✧　　 　　˚ 　　　 . ✧　　 　　˚ 　　　 .

October will be filled with joy.

October will be filled with love.

October will be filled with trust.

October will be filled with peace.

October will be filled with miracles.

October will be filled with clarity.

October will be filled with blessings.

I love when you meet someone and you just click. You know you’re supposed to be friends or lovers or something. You just know the universe said “you two, yeah you, don’t leave each other’s side okay?”. Here’s to meeting awesome new people and forming amazing new bonds.

hiii i just wanted to say that i love how you are such a positive energy around here, always expressing sweet and warm things to everyone and creating such a friendly and gentle vibe. it makes me smile everytime! thank you for being you and doing what you do💖

(sorry for being anon, it’s @/traded-my-soul-for-a-minute here, but off-anon this ask would send from my main blog and i’m trying to keep the two at least a bit separate!☺️)

This is so incredibly sweet. 💝💗

I genuinely do try to bring a visible Zest For Life and living healthy to the table with my thoughts and feelings.

I don't post self-deprecating things that aren't just a spicy humor.

This blog doesn't post or react to anything about being stupid unless I'm dropping reminders in how Special and Important we all are to have here and to find ourselves here for us. In the world.

What I give I needed a lot of growing up,. I want to give others what I didn't. Selflessly. Openly. From based honesty and effort of my own.

It's important to remember achieving "Perfection" is a myth handed down by those who hold a stigmatized view of some humans being better in any way than others. Isn't true. .

Achieve perfection for YOU. Find the best you that you can and soak in the warmth of all that'll bring in the peace of it's acceptance for yourself.

This is so kind and gentle to come and provide such an awareness and again allow me the opportunity to express in return why and how and give thanks to that being such a well recieved message. 💛💚

It's important to see good,. Especially in places many of us go to run and escape all the bad and hard and painful a while. Spicy as this place can be, it doesn't need to be toxic to bask in nor add to it. I choose Honesty and Empathy forward, always.

_______________Grief🕯_______________

We know it comes in stages. Waves. Levels of understood chaos and misunderstood order. The reason is that feelings aren't there to be rational. Least of all when we're feeling hurt or sad or scared. Rationality is a practice and rarely one that goes hand in hand with grief, where we can tell ourselves it's this and not that..that we're over it until that scent comes walking by on a stranger in passing and lights the walls up inside us again. Pets, people,. Ourselves. We can grieve all three, and in all three, we see the same familiar stages.

Denial, anger, depression, and acceptance. Some add the step of bargaining after anger before depression. I don't think we would bargain about our great woes if we weren't depressed, so I feel that's a bit redundant.

We don't want them to be gone, to have it as it is, to feel the day in the loss of what we grieve. We're mad they left us, that the situation is what it is no matter What we have to say about any of it now, mad it's not our choice to fix it. Mad some things can't be despite all we gave. It also made them fragile. Depression in helplessness. Hopelessness.. the feeling of being absolutely stuck in loss or such a change that grief has come with the changes weight, which too is common. After a while, "Acceptance" sets in. I don't believe it's really a true acceptance of the loss.. more finding a way to accept the reality after building the idea it could never have happened that way in our hearts. Some wounds never heal, no matter how we rationalize it.

The takeaway from these things is that it's hard to fully let go of something. Even grief when we didn't make the choice to hold it in the first place or for as long as we have. It grows familiar like moss growing on a log in a way and we come to realize letting go of the grief is often the last of what we had to hold of what inset the feelings to begin with, making it especially hard to pull ourselves from bed. To have the water. To do the self health. The effort to grow and develop. To get back into the active choices and routines of wellness for us. To peel away the negative and allow sunshine to hit our bare bark again.

As with so many posts before this, we come to the stages of this one to remind you it's worth it. To battle the grief and loss. To battle those heavy weights, keeping your soul down in bed, days on end. It's okay to take the time you need in loss, even of yourself. It's a scary place to be, relearning who you are. You don't realize when you let someone or something go, how much of you may be threadlocked onto that concept and unravel as it puts space between. It will take strength you have and don't believe anymore. It will take courage to believe tomorrow has a better and better chance of being a good day again eventually. It will take believing in you to find the fight, but as before, for what it's worth, I believe in you. Human to human and for no other reason than wanting to and believing it possible for you to win again in your life. For things to be good. For you to be okay. You deserve to have you. All of you, before and above all else, no matter what. That takes time and finding energy in willpower to eat and hydrate and find peace in fresh air again. To make the moves you need to for your soul survival. You will always have this space and me as long as I'm here cheering you on and making posts like these to remind you of these truths in your fight to heart you aren't afraid to hold again. A sense of self.

You matter. Today and tomorrow and yesterday and next week. You matter, and you are worth seeing the days you haven't yet and healing the ones that hurt to get where you are to have better. You are worth better inside yourself. Worth more than the tear stained stuffies and soggy hoodie sleeves. Worth more than the gray cloud constantly reminding you how empty and devoid of light it all is.. I assure it's only that way in a 3x3 foot space, pouring down while it's pouring down. The rest of the world is awaiting your ready in warmth, color, and abundant acceptance in so many avenues you've not yet even seen.

Grief can, in some measures, ache without defeat, but we are still the ones to carry it, however seemingly endless. We are the ones in control of what we hold. We need to have the cornerstones of wellness to maintain, hold, and carry on of it, but we can and we should! There is so much more to our world than the breakups, the loss of someone/s dear. The changes we have to face in our own lives. Fluids, Sustenance, Fresh Air, time, patience, and the consistent effort to do what we need for us, even on a Primal level of the basics. Especially water and air. The rest will follow if you feed yourself as a plant. As organic as you are. Water, air. Soil. Sun. Eventually a little nutrient in some foods,. Maybe snacks at first.

I know you're tired,. Tired of being hurt. Tired of being mad. Tired of being unsure or worried or even beyond all that, just depressed it's the way it is no matter why it is. Dont forget sleep. Ypur body wants to sleep, let it. You'll be amazed how little by little a nap can at least allow you the desire after enough to make you question the coldness of the floor. The brightness of outside. It'll take a bit for anyone to feel ready coming out into the world again after it all just came down around them for so long prior..

Remember to be soft with yourself. The toothpaste will piss you off. The labels in markets. The cars license frame in front of you.. it's not against you. It's grief. It's the reminders. The aches of remembering in a time you're plenty well remembering.. breathe. Take a few minutes., step aside of it all a bit, and just breathe. No action is worth a spontaneous emotionally charged reaction but love.

You will grow again. It's hard to believe above all else that feeling in you isn't dying. Just a very terrible ache of growth you didn't ask for. You didn't consent to, and you have to heal from. You will smile and laugh and play again. You will love again. You will feel like you as you should. You will be whole for you if you do the work on you and for you. I promise it's true. You are worth having as much of you as life allows you to maintain, and as much as you can discover to build on and help maintain it all.

The sun will rise and set and rise again.

You are making an active choice to be here and see that. To feel that. To be a part of that. Don't forget you're here for you too. That people love you. That I love you just for trying. Just for being human and wanting to be whole in that. Just for wanting you to be okay with you. That is a Huge undertaking. A life project for some. Many of us hold this and think little of the development, but the energy, time, and effort that goes into grief is large, as are the emotions felt within it. To overcome that time and time and time again is brave. It is courageous. We don't realize it in the time, but it's a battle to keep or get back to ourselves in that distress. That takes real work on ourselves to do that and with any level of success, but after enough time, it does begin to develop again. To feel tangible. Real. You begin to realize you're eating more. Talking more.. missing some of your favored activities enough to branch back out or even consider new activities you might like if you're under self rediscovery.

It's so hard to keep ourselves. Who we are as much as whst we are here. It can come and go and come back. It can hurt. It can heal. It can grow and decline. But it can also always hold possibility in what it Can do. Do the work to make it something good for you. To be here for you in a way you're happy again. Whole for you again in any sense you're able. For you. Not for anyone else. You matter in your life. To me if you need an example., but you should find matter for yourself more than others. You're the one living in you. Fighting in you. Surviving in you and you will again. I believe it. I believe you will again.

You need to start believing you will again, too, but don't force it. Just try to give it your best. No one, including you, can ask more of you than that.

___________________🌿__________________

[Friendly reminder that this tag 📖 in my tags list will ALWAYS lead you to Positivity. Self Health, Internal Growth And Development, Truthful Reassurance, Tools to learn HOW to Fish, and not just more fish in the now.. it is not monitored who shares or uses these posts. These ones I write myself just for all of you. It's for all of us. Share it. Use it. Recycle it. Chew it like ginger gum. For an intrinsic boost of wellness.]