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If you continue to read below you will hear more about my personal hygiene than you signed up for. You’ve been warned.
I confessed this story to someone and their “WTF?!” reaction prompted me to post.
I used to shave my pubic hair. All of it. It was the only way he liked it. For those of you who’ve never done it before, or don’t have a vulva you’ll just have to trust that it is a seriously tedious and arduous task.
Sometimes I wouldn’t be prompt with my upkeep. It was such a pain, and there were so many things in my day that I had to do. There were constant complaints from him about how women find them selves good men, settle down and just let themselves go. Then they wonder why their husbands cheat on them.
So one day I guess he just got so frustrated with me dropping the ball that he was going to take matters into his own hands. Literally.
I was showering and he came in the room ( I curse EVERY bathroom lock we ever had for PURE INEFFECTIVENESS). Without asking, he got in the shower with me and grabbed my razor.
He started shaving me. I’ll admit I did not protest too much, but I was obviously uncomfortable. That progressed shortly to physical manifestations of panic, fear and anxiety: dizziness, nausea, difficulty breathing, chills (while in a hot shower no less), but I managed to hold back tears.
He got angry with me for shaking and losing my balance and went on a rant. I had once again ruined what could have been a sweet and sexy moment.
Apparently I don’t know how to keep my cool with a razor-blade centimetres from my clitoris when it is in the hands of someone prone to outbursts and no idea what he’s doing.
When he got out and stomped off in a rage, I let the tears flow silently.
This post gets a bit explicit with named body parts, dubious consent and some violence. For the record, there are likely people who enjoy some of the things he did to me. I am totally in support of people getting off the ways they like to get off. Please understand that I am condemning these actions as symptoms of the horrible power imbalance in my relationship, lack of consent, and intention to hurt me and make me uncomfortable.
My clitoris is pretty sensitive. I have a hard time with direct stimulation - it's "too much" at times, but i can work through it slowly with some patience.
He used to do things that would make me jump and guard it because he said it was 'hot.' He used to shock me with this contraption he made- a few times me made me let him shock my clitoris directly despite my regular and continual protests and insistence that I wouldn't like it. "Just try it" he said as he held me down and did it. I cried. And he threw the contraption at me telling me that I was boring and never wanted to try anything new.
He bit me once, when he did me the magnificent and rare gesture of going down on me. Chomped on my clit because he thought I wasn't conveying my enjoyment sufficiently. I screamed and cried and bucked him off. "Oh, so you can make noise. I was just checking."
He pinched it when I wasn't doing exactly what he wanted when we were fucking, and loved experimenting with all manners of things whether i wanted to or not ( cold, hot, food, lubes, creams, toys, etc). So anytime he got near it i tensed my pelvis muscles to guard it.