Sarcastic Prompts - Tumblr Posts

requests are open.

puffy’s prompt + au list.

for the last several weeks i have been stuck in a bit of writer’s block. nothing too severe, but still, i haven’t had much inspiration for fresh, new ideas. so, i decided to put together a small, little list of some misplaced dialogue prompts i have had resting in my google docs for quite a long while now. you can send in 1 - 2 prompts, a character or ship, as well as an AU. i will then write a drabble based on what you give me to work with. however, it could turn out to be longer, it all just depends on how inspired i am by the request. here is the list of fandoms, characters, and ships i write for. 

Dialogue Prompts:

 "Correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought you hit puberty already.”

“I'm sick of pretending.” 

“I love you so much. You'll always be more than enough.”

“We’re not together, y’know. Him and I.”

“Why are you so nice to everyone? To me?”

“What are we?”

“I didn't fall for you, you tripped me!” “No. You fell. Almost like that one time over there where you nearly broke your knee cap.” 

“Would it be okay if I told you I love you?” “No.” “Well, too bad, because I do. You’re just going to have to get used to that because it’s a fact of life.”

“We really ought to talk.”

“Me oh my, isn’t that a surprise?”

“I wish I could hate you more than I do.”

“If you've always hated me, why did you bother with saving me?”

“Do you love him?” “I do, but not like you think.”

“You can't because this is wrong, or because this feels right?”

“You kissed me. I kissed you. Felt like chemistry, if you ask me.”

“You’re Scared. It’s okay to be scared, y’know. It’s a natural, human instinct. You are human, right?”

“And you are?”

“Are you an angel? Because -” “Yeah, I am. But keep in mind, so was Lucifer.”

“I love you, love you, love you, love you...” “Please shut up. You’re only drunk.”

“Please don’t look at me like that.” “Like what?” “Like there’s a chance you might actually care about me.”

“You trust me, right?” “Not really.” “Good, because I don’t either.”

“Please. Just let me help for once.”

“Open up. I know you’re in there.” “I’m not home.” “They always say that in the movies. Don’t be like the people in the movies.”

“Don’t die on me, please.” “Might actually miss me, huh?” “No. I’d just be out of a home, and it’s the dead of winter.”

 “Don’t ever expect me to take a bullet for you, but if the time ever came, I would definitely let you have the last doughnut.”

 “Don’t let go. Not now, not ever.”

“Promise?” “Promise.”

“I think I might just die without you.” “No. You wouldn’t. You’d survive, and trust me when I say that’s much worse.”

“I love you.” “Prove it.”

 “I couldn’t sleep, and not just because of my insomnia.”

“Just... hold me. Please.”

“You have a cute face. Let’s kiss.”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Let’s go get a slushie.”

“Let’s paint the town red tonight. Just you and I. What do you say?”

“I love you just a little too much.”

“You’re insane.” “Perhaps. But aren’t we all just a little bit manic?”

“I think in another life I’m a cat. I somehow always survive these type of situations.”

“Spin me as fast as you can, and twirl me around until I can’t see. Make me laugh until I can’t breathe.”

“I understand if you don’t want the baby. But I do, and I am, and I will.”

“You make me crazy, but baby, maybe I like the taste of insanity.”

“I love you. More than I ever, truly knew. More than you’ll ever begin to know.”

“Everything I do is all for you.”

“Would it really kill you if we kissed?”

“You changed the game.”

“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m too busy being yours to even bother with anyone else.” “Well, in case you haven’t noticed, I’m too busy ignoring you to even care.”

“It’s simply enough to be in love with you, and even more so to be loved by you.”

“Kissing’s overrated.” 

“I want to be yours. Is that really too much to ask?”

“We found each other. Call it a mere coincidence if you will, but I don’t believe our meeting was just a happy accident.”

“Just say the words, and I’ll be yours.”

“You’re hopeless.” “Nah, I’ve got you. I can at least say I’ve got that going for me.”

“You’re cold, I’m hot. If I didn’t know better, I’d say destiny has a hand in all this.”

“Just stay where you are. I’m on my way, okay?”

“I’ve got my secrets, but oh darling, don’t we all?”

“Ouch. Feelin’ mean today, huh?” “I’m mean everyday, babe. Try and keep up.”

“Read my lips.”

“You can’t scam me into loving you.”

“Sweets, you couldn’t ignore me even if you tried.”

“You know you can talk to me.” “I know.”

“I’m having a bad day.”

“Please shut up. You’re contaminating the air with a toxic amount of stupidity.”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s on the house.”

“Can’t you see that I am yours, and you are mine?” “No. People do not belong to people. That’s just not the way it works.”

“Let’s run away, just you and I. We can be the modern day Bonnie and Clyde.”

“I’m going to kill you.” “Too late. Already have.”

“I love you.” “Thanks.”

“Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment, or two?”

“My mistake was falling for you.”

“Being bad feels pretty good, huh?”

“You were the beginning of my ending.”

“And what do you know about love?” “Absolutely nothing at all.”

“I hate you.” “Would it be childish of me to say I hate you more?”

“I don’t believe I ever had one of those.” “One of what?” “A heart.”

“There are many things that I am unsure of. Our friendship, and your mental state included.”

“If you value your life at all, you’ll shut up.” 

“You told me you loved me, but I think I was drunk.”

“My heart told me to come to you, my head told me to stay. Honestly, my head really is a stupid place.”

“Kiss me like you don’t just need me.”

“May I suggest a make out session to help us figure out this little problem of ours?”

List of AUs

Arranged Marriage 

Art Museum

Assassin

Back in Time (e. g. 1920s, 1950s, etc.)

Beauty & the Beast 

Boarding School/Dark Prep School

Bookstore

Cinderella 

Clubbing

Coffee Shop

College  

Con Artists

Cop & Robber 

Domestic Life

Forbidden Romance

Friends Turned Lovers

Friends With Benefits

Gossip Girl

Girl/Boy Next Door

High School

Late Night Grocery Store Run

Masquerade

Mermaid

Modern Day

Neighbors

New Girl/Guy

Nurse & Patient

(Literal) Partners in Crime

Parents

Party

Pretend Dating

Pretend Marriage

Pride & Prejudice

Road Trip

Small Town

Soulmate 

Summer Job

Reality TV Show

Road Trip 

Roommates 

*I ask you to please not repost this list, just reblog please. I put a lot of time and effort into it.