Tf Sg - Tumblr Posts

2 years ago

Bayverse Optimus: Can you imagine not being you, and just living out your days as a weeping willow, though? Beautiful? By the water? Unburdened?

Shattered Glass Optimus: I wanna be the one from Harry Potter that beats the shit out of everyone and everything.


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2 years ago

TFP Optimus: All I’m saying is 99% of the time, when random crap happens, you are somehow involved!

Shattered Glass Optimus: Can’t you have a little faith in that last 1%?


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2 years ago

*Shattered Glass Megatron and TFA Megatron in an art museum*

TFA Megatron: Can we take a picture?

Shattered Glass Megatron, taking out a camera: Sure

TFA Megatron, grabbing a painting off the wall: OK QUICK!!! Let’s go before they catch us!

Shattered Glass Megatron: WHAT—


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2 years ago

TFP Optimus: All the Optimus Primes will be able to work together to reach a common goal and achieve peace. What could go wrong?

20 Minutes Later…

Shattered Glass Optimus: *trying to strangle someone*

G1 Optimus: I’m the real Optimus Prime!

Cyberverse Optimus: No, I am!

TFA Optimus: WHTA WHAT WHERE AM I WHO ARE YOU

TFP Optimus: This probably wasn’t such a good idea…

Bayverse Optimus, out of nowhere: MURDER!!!!


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2 years ago

Cyberverse Optimus: The best part of an oreo is the cookie part, not the frosting. Deal with it.

Bayverse Optimus: Darkness without light is an abyss. Light without darkness is blinding. You cannot have a coin with one side.

Shattered Glass Optimus: YO SOCRATES! IT'S A FUCKING COOKIE!


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2 years ago

Bayverse Optimus: I am a moderate, peaceful person.

TFP Optimus: You threw a chair at Shattered Glass Optimus three minutes ago.

Bayverse Optimus: Yes. It was a moderate, peaceful compromise from the table I was originally planning to throw at that little shit.


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2 years ago

TFA Megatron: Why does Shattered Glass Megatron have a dent in their face?

IDW Megatron: They were saying ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.’ So TFP Megatron threw one of your datapads at them.

TFP Megatron: It was just to test a theory.


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2 years ago

Shattered Glass Optimus: What is this!?

TFP Optimus: That’s the weight of guilt. Give in to the nice side. Help those unfortunate, and make the guilt go away, my friend.

Shattered Glass Optimus: Ow! Make it stop!

TFP Optimus: Surrender to your kindness, Shattered Glass Optimus. It’s nice to be nice.

Shattered Glass Optimus: Your guilt is strong, but it is no match for the power of my selfishness!


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2 years ago

Shattered Glass Megatron: Visualize the ocean.

Bayverse Megatron: *screams*

Shattered Glass Megatron: The surface.

Bayverse Megatron: Oh.

(you know how he gets thrown into the sea at the end of the first movie?)


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2 years ago

Cyberverse Megatron: I’m… grounded?

IDW Megatron: Yes. You’re grounded.

G1 Megatron: We’re going to bury you until you’ve learned your lesson!

Shattered Glass Megatron: That’s…not how grounding works...


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2 years ago

A very angry Cyberverse Optimus: I hate you with every inch of my being!

Shattered Glass Optimus: Well, that's not a lot of inches.

Cyberverse Optimus:

Shattered Glass Optimus:

Cyberverse Optimus: You'd better start running now

cyberverse optimus is the shortest

im not lying


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2 years ago

Shattered Glass Megatron: One time, Cyberverse Megatron and TFP Megatron were having a heated argument in the ship and TFP Megatron took Cyberverse Megatron's tape out of the player and threw it out the airlock in a rage.

Shattered Glass Megatron: Then Cyberverse Megatron looked him dead in the optic, pulled out a second copy of that same tape, and put it back in the player.


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2 years ago

G1 Optimus: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.

TFP Optimus: No, that's not how you make cookies.

Cyberverse Optimus: FLOOR IT!!

G1 Optimus: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!?

TFP Optimus: yOU'RE GONNA MELT US ALL DOWN-

G1 Optimus: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF A FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES!

Shattered Glass Optimus: DO IT!

TFP Optimus: NO-


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2 years ago

TFP Megatron: FUCK THE CHAIR. PARDON ME FOR MAKING MYSELF COMFORTABLE DURING A SINCERE HEART TO HEART DISCUSSION WITH A DEAR FRIEND IN NEED! TFP Megatron: BUT THE TIME HAS COME FOR ME TO CEASE STRADDLING THIS DEEPLY OFFENSIVE PIECE OF FURNITURE! AWAY WITH YE, FOUR LEGGED TEMPTRESS! DISTRACT US NO MORE WITH THE MOST BASIC AND UTILITARIAN FORM OF COMFORT YOU SUPPLY! Shattered Glass Megatron: TFP Megatron just threw a tantrum about a chair. Shattered Glass Megatron: I just won TFP Megatron Tantrum Bingo.


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