Tiktok Army - Tumblr Posts
Once again begging y’all to keep it to yourselves. And if your gonna talk about an idol smoking fucking tag it properly so those of us who don’t wanna know can avoid it. I have stuff in my blocked tags for a reason but that doesn’t fucking work if people don’t tag correctly (I’m looking at you tiktok army)
And I get that people will say ‘well your trauma isn’t my responsibility’ no it isn’t but how am I supposed to be responsible for my own trauma if y’all make it impossible to have the things I’ve put in place to protect myself actually work and keeping me away from it. It’s not that fucking hard to just put a tag or hashtag so those of us who don’t wanna know can actually have our blocked tags work.
Disclaimer cause I know some people will take this wrong: This in not me saying idols shouldn’t smoke or that they’re bad people for smoking, this is just me saying I don’t wanna know about it is they do.
(TW: mentions of smoking trauma. Trauma rant)
This may be a controversial topic. But if you suspect an idol of vaping or smoking, keep it to your fucking self. If they do smoke I don’t wanna know about it because it genuinely really triggers me when people point it out. Like I know this is a toxic idea but it really fucking changes my view of people when I find out the might smoke. Like I saw a Koreaboo post about an idol possibly accidentally showing a vape on live and it actually made me feel physically I’ll. Like I had a physical reaction and it’s actually made me feel really uncomfortable and shitty. Like my skin went clams and I literally felt myself go pale and my stomach turn. I have huge trauma around smoking and I can’t get over the way it makes me feel when rumours come up around people I look up to smoking. Like I know I have no right to feel like I’ve been betrayed by that idol if they are smoking but I do. And I’m sick of people pointing it out cause i literally feel myself tear up cause it feels like someone I trusted had stabbed me. And idk if it’s the autism or the CPTSD but it makes me feel physically ill. Like I’m not exaggerating when I say it literally made me go pale and feel like I couldn’t breathe. And like it’s not even as if I can try to avoid it because I already fucking do my best to avoid it but I literally can’t because it’s fucking everywhere. And I know I probably sound super selfish and self centred but can you guys just shut the fuck up and keep it to yourself if you suspect an idol of smoking. Like some of us don’t wanna know about that shit and y’all make it impossible to avoid it. I’m so fucking tired. I already feel like everything is going to fucking shit in my life and I’ve already had a fucking breakdown today and I’m so fucking tired and I fucking hate how much this has fucking affected me cause y’all can’t mind your own fucking business and keep your suspicions to yourselves.