Wallflowerduo - Tumblr Posts

Ok, scrap it, I'm gonna talk about Wallflower duo (Fit and Philza) and no one's gonna stop me.

They're THE duo for me. Since the day one they were inseparable always being by each other side, going on adventures together, bringing kids, sharing game breaking hacks. They honestly fall for a dynamic of "the guy with paranoia is a bestie with a dude with THE most dark secrets", but they're making it work. Philza is very paranoid and always kept an eye on his eggs, especially after Slime tried to kill Chayanne in his sleep and Quackity trying to kidnap Tallulah. Yet he gave Fit access to the kids bedroom and told everything he knew to him. And Fit responded with the same amount of trust. He is a person from 2b2t and doesn't trust a soul, but he shared every bit of info he got, and shared his secret room. It's a huge step for someone from the server, where you couldn't share even a little peak of coordinates. Yet he let Phil on the secret. Throughout all the Qsmp they were together. Fit was there when eggs first disappeared, and for presidential dinner. When Phil logged back to the server, his anarchy bestie was right there to fill him in, and even when everyone got tped out if area, Fit still somehow got back and told "I'm with you, Phil". And healed him near the end of the battle. When crow father had any meetings with someone he didn't trust (Happy pills Forever), he'd ask Fit to spy on them, and vice versa. And the last bit that makes me rotate them in my head 24/7, a cage for a cage moment. Fit always hesitated to break the rules, not to lose a job. Even for morning crew he had to be persuaded to go to the nether. But once Philza asked if he knew how to make lavacasts, he didn't ask anything. They both broke the rules together. And after crow was caught and released, our bald fella keeps an eye on him. "I know you for a long time, Phil, you're not the one to hallucinate". And this bird accident from tomorrow's stream.... Man, they're the besties. Also Fit having a micro separation anxiety attack after he lost Phil out of sight for a few seconds was as funny as it was sad.

They're in this together and they know it. They've got each other's back and are confident in each other.

And just last quote I feel describes them the best is from 10/4/2023 stream.

"I'm afraid I'm gonna piss off God again (for having a golden Apple)"

...

"You and I.. We walk into churches and they burn down just by our presence."

"This whole world will remember us" From Bonnie and Clyde the musical vibes ngl👀

Well, ig it's time for me to talk about one of my favorite lores and streamers at this point.

Fit MC of 2B2T and his tragedy.

Honestly, when I watched the launch of QSMP I was full on Philza watcher. I never knew Fit before, but I was charmed by his voice, humor and friendship with crow father. And honestly I never even expected any lore from him, so when his first lore stream happened I was pleasantly surprised! So, I really want to express how much I love Fit's lore. It's not in your face and has a lot of subtle hints and build up. Honestly, it's not an essay but rather an expression of true admiration of masterful story telling in form of incoherent ramblings.

(I'll try to compose it, but I can't promise it'll always be coherent)

So let's start with quick review of his lore. FitMC of 2B2T is, evidently from the oldest anachy server. It's described as wasteland, where you can't trust or be trusted. Once he was approached by a person, whom Fit can't remember. It was a contractor who sent our favorite war criminal to the Qsmp with a mission to steal player data. Everything up from there is in vods.

Well, it is a great start, isn't it? At this point we have a very sad start. Practically no trust and emotional connection to anything. The eternal destruction, explosions, deaths and betrayals don't teach you anything different. So once he came to the server, I imagine, Fit didn't care about anything but mission. Player data and that's all, but right from the start this mindset started to change because of the greatest misfortunes of any mercenary or a 2b2t player. Emotional connection.

So now let me break this up into some sections.

Philza: you really thought I won't bring him up? As a greatest (platonic) Fitza/Wallflower duo enjoyer or just a Phil watcher, I couldn't leave him out of this post. I really think that Fit's learning started with crow father. From the start we know that they're at least are acquaintances. But throughout all this months they grew into something more. Philza's trust is hard to get, but if you get it this'll be worth it. Yet Fit got it. Throughout the good old days of Qsmp, when everything was easier, Fitza always were together. No matter was it a life threat or a camping trip with kids, they're with each other. Trusting to each other enough to letting each other in eggs' homes. And after feces hit the fan, it didn't change. A person, who was taught to never trust a soul and to survive no matter what, was standing there, saying "I'm with you, Phil" In the midst of attack. The trust between them is just incomprehensible. A paranoid hardcore survivor and a war criminal, with a lot of secrets and separetion anxiety, became best friends. If anything goes South for Phil, Fit'll be spying, controlling situation. If a wise crow ever starts loosing his sense of reality, this soaked in blood hand will lay on his shoulder, reassuringly. And it isn't one sided. If Fit needs anything Philza instantly passes him it ("You're too good to me"). Phil shares everything he can with Fit and even trusted the Dream to him. And Fit even had a small separation anxiety attack, just cuz Phil was gone for a few seconds. They are so close, Fit even considered letting in Phil on his purpose, Aaaaah... They're gonna be the death of me. Philza learned Fit friendship/ platonic love.

"You [Phil] and I [Fit].... We walk into churches and they burn just by our presence."

Ramon: the baby boy made in heaven by God himself. There's so much to be said here. Once again, coming into the island, Fit never expected to connect with someone, especially to have a son. After having a rocky relationship with Spreen was left one on one with a child. The absurdity of situation is just as laughable, as ironic. A man, who's hobby was killing kids with no back thought, was now stuck with a child, having no idea of how to raise him. And, honestly, he did pretty good! He gave Ramon freedom, but always was here, close enough to help if needed. Of course he wasn't the saint, yet he always tried to be as honest as he could, even letting him on the "Family secret". Ramon loves his dad, and it's obvious by how he helps Fit with his job, building him a communication with his contractor. The little one even taught this cold person to be kinder and more open. They only have each other. And Fit is ready to do anything if it means he'd get to leave with his baby boy by his side. Also I don't wanna hear a scrap about 2b2t historian not caring about his son's disappearance. He does. After behaving and distancing himself from his past antics, he decided to burn the ship, where Ramon lost his first life, just to avenge his baby. He visits his sons house every stream, looking if maybe he came back. If you want any prove of how much they care about each other search Ramon's graduation. They made each other better and their love is just aaahhh. I love them. Ramon taught Fit parental love.

"Baby boy, made in heaven, by God himself.."

PacTW: the last, but not least, Pacman himself. Oooh, love, oooh, lover boy.... Now, I haven't watched a lot of their interactions, but from all I've seen they're suuuuper in love/crush. All those little glances to each other, protection, quality time... Honestly, I think these two videos explain everything. They trust each other and at least have a crush on each other. And once again, there're a lot of small moments that prove this point. Fit having a small panic attack over not seeing pac for a few seconds and even helping to find Walter Bob and Mike. And Pac, no matter how much he loves Mike, didn't drop Fit after the latter was accused of being a traitor. Love is blooming, and even though it's "baby steps" These are still steps. It takes a lot to relearn trust and especially this kind of intimacy, when all you knew before was war, betrayal and lie. And thus Pac taught him love and trust.( I'm not big on shipping but every time hide duo hug my life gets a little better).

"Baby steps, chat. Baby steps. (Puts roses Pac gifted him)"

But, why did I call Fit and his fate tragic, and then just list all the good interactions Qsmp gave him. After all he experienced at 2b2t , this island seems like a heaven. But, Fit was, is, and forever will be stranger at the paradise (this man is way too good at presenting lore. Even music gives us soo much things to think about... I love it.). No matter how much Fit loves people around him and feels this being reciprocated, he'll never have this full closure. He knows and believes that once everyone knew his mission, they'll hate him. Even people I listed before. He'll never be fully honest with anyone (apart from Ramon), and no matter how people love him. Fit truly feels for Baghera, when she told him about her past and her fear of telling it to BBH. It is literally what he struggles with. This dialogue has a lot of good foils and parallels. The fear of their past, full trust/ forced lie, darkness/ light, and eventually positive outlook. Baghera was eventually able to trust Bad with her secret, yet Fit wasn't. But this paradise spoiled this war criminal. It made him more trusting, more social. Fit can't now be alone, cuz he connected with people. This server, though is full of secrets, lies and danger, is still a paradise. A heaven on earth for a lonely man...

So the last part of this long ahh post is about his desire. The one thing that convinced Fit to go to qsmp. Freedom. Which he doesn't have. By making this deal with Contractor he fell into the trap. He must to find this player data, or else he'll return to the world he tried to escape. For forever. With no way out. But once he came to the server, Cucurucho will never let him go. So he's now in double trap. Yet the biggest trap is Ramon. He's prepared to sacrifice everything for his baby boy, and can't leave the island without him. And without Ramon Fit wouldn't be able to contact the contractor. So in creating connections, Fit traps himself further.

I can't really call it a character analysis, but it's all I see in Fit's lore. A very lonely war criminal, that got so tired of distrust and destruction, that he agreed on a spy mission. But once his mission started he learned how to love and care, that he trapped himself further. Love isn't a miracle that saves you, but it's a very useful tool. Once you learn to understand and reciprocate it, life may become better. (Sorry, it's super cheesy, but I think it encompasses Fits character very good) .

Fit is a spy. They're not supposed to have a family and love, because they can't stay for long. And I think at first, Fit saw everything and everyone as just a means to an end. Just the player data. But after all that has passed he can't be the same. He has a son, friends and a possible love interest. Will he be able to still continue his mission? Will he still betray them and they're trust? I don't know.

But I now I love how cc! Fit does his lore. It isn't so in the face and doesn't affects other, yet it is so layered. Everything is so important down to the music choice aaaaagh. I don't even pretend to analyse everything in his lore like contractor, memory loss, head aches and ect.

I just love it. It's marvelous.

Thank you very much❤❤❤❤❤ it helps a lot, you literally carry the Fitza nation rn thx

Well, ig it's time for me to talk about one of my favorite lores and streamers at this point.

Fit MC of 2B2T and his tragedy.

Honestly, when I watched the launch of QSMP I was full on Philza watcher. I never knew Fit before, but I was charmed by his voice, humor and friendship with crow father. And honestly I never even expected any lore from him, so when his first lore stream happened I was pleasantly surprised! So, I really want to express how much I love Fit's lore. It's not in your face and has a lot of subtle hints and build up. Honestly, it's not an essay but rather an expression of true admiration of masterful story telling in form of incoherent ramblings.

(I'll try to compose it, but I can't promise it'll always be coherent)

So let's start with quick review of his lore. FitMC of 2B2T is, evidently from the oldest anachy server. It's described as wasteland, where you can't trust or be trusted. Once he was approached by a person, whom Fit can't remember. It was a contractor who sent our favorite war criminal to the Qsmp with a mission to steal player data. Everything up from there is in vods.

Well, it is a great start, isn't it? At this point we have a very sad start. Practically no trust and emotional connection to anything. The eternal destruction, explosions, deaths and betrayals don't teach you anything different. So once he came to the server, I imagine, Fit didn't care about anything but mission. Player data and that's all, but right from the start this mindset started to change because of the greatest misfortunes of any mercenary or a 2b2t player. Emotional connection.

So now let me break this up into some sections.

Philza: you really thought I won't bring him up? As a greatest (platonic) Fitza/Wallflower duo enjoyer or just a Phil watcher, I couldn't leave him out of this post. I really think that Fit's learning started with crow father. From the start we know that they're at least are acquaintances. But throughout all this months they grew into something more. Philza's trust is hard to get, but if you get it this'll be worth it. Yet Fit got it. Throughout the good old days of Qsmp, when everything was easier, Fitza always were together. No matter was it a life threat or a camping trip with kids, they're with each other. Trusting to each other enough to letting each other in eggs' homes. And after feces hit the fan, it didn't change. A person, who was taught to never trust a soul and to survive no matter what, was standing there, saying "I'm with you, Phil" In the midst of attack. The trust between them is just incomprehensible. A paranoid hardcore survivor and a war criminal, with a lot of secrets and separetion anxiety, became best friends. If anything goes South for Phil, Fit'll be spying, controlling situation. If a wise crow ever starts loosing his sense of reality, this soaked in blood hand will lay on his shoulder, reassuringly. And it isn't one sided. If Fit needs anything Philza instantly passes him it ("You're too good to me"). Phil shares everything he can with Fit and even trusted the Dream to him. And Fit even had a small separation anxiety attack, just cuz Phil was gone for a few seconds. They are so close, Fit even considered letting in Phil on his purpose, Aaaaah... They're gonna be the death of me. Philza learned Fit friendship/ platonic love.

"You [Phil] and I [Fit].... We walk into churches and they burn just by our presence."

Ramon: the baby boy made in heaven by God himself. There's so much to be said here. Once again, coming into the island, Fit never expected to connect with someone, especially to have a son. After having a rocky relationship with Spreen was left one on one with a child. The absurdity of situation is just as laughable, as ironic. A man, who's hobby was killing kids with no back thought, was now stuck with a child, having no idea of how to raise him. And, honestly, he did pretty good! He gave Ramon freedom, but always was here, close enough to help if needed. Of course he wasn't the saint, yet he always tried to be as honest as he could, even letting him on the "Family secret". Ramon loves his dad, and it's obvious by how he helps Fit with his job, building him a communication with his contractor. The little one even taught this cold person to be kinder and more open. They only have each other. And Fit is ready to do anything if it means he'd get to leave with his baby boy by his side. Also I don't wanna hear a scrap about 2b2t historian not caring about his son's disappearance. He does. After behaving and distancing himself from his past antics, he decided to burn the ship, where Ramon lost his first life, just to avenge his baby. He visits his sons house every stream, looking if maybe he came back. If you want any prove of how much they care about each other search Ramon's graduation. They made each other better and their love is just aaahhh. I love them. Ramon taught Fit parental love.

"Baby boy, made in heaven, by God himself.."

PacTW: the last, but not least, Pacman himself. Oooh, love, oooh, lover boy.... Now, I haven't watched a lot of their interactions, but from all I've seen they're suuuuper in love/crush. All those little glances to each other, protection, quality time... Honestly, I think these two videos explain everything. They trust each other and at least have a crush on each other. And once again, there're a lot of small moments that prove this point. Fit having a small panic attack over not seeing pac for a few seconds and even helping to find Walter Bob and Mike. And Pac, no matter how much he loves Mike, didn't drop Fit after the latter was accused of being a traitor. Love is blooming, and even though it's "baby steps" These are still steps. It takes a lot to relearn trust and especially this kind of intimacy, when all you knew before was war, betrayal and lie. And thus Pac taught him love and trust.( I'm not big on shipping but every time hide duo hug my life gets a little better).

"Baby steps, chat. Baby steps. (Puts roses Pac gifted him)"

But, why did I call Fit and his fate tragic, and then just list all the good interactions Qsmp gave him. After all he experienced at 2b2t , this island seems like a heaven. But, Fit was, is, and forever will be stranger at the paradise (this man is way too good at presenting lore. Even music gives us soo much things to think about... I love it.). No matter how much Fit loves people around him and feels this being reciprocated, he'll never have this full closure. He knows and believes that once everyone knew his mission, they'll hate him. Even people I listed before. He'll never be fully honest with anyone (apart from Ramon), and no matter how people love him. Fit truly feels for Baghera, when she told him about her past and her fear of telling it to BBH. It is literally what he struggles with. This dialogue has a lot of good foils and parallels. The fear of their past, full trust/ forced lie, darkness/ light, and eventually positive outlook. Baghera was eventually able to trust Bad with her secret, yet Fit wasn't. But this paradise spoiled this war criminal. It made him more trusting, more social. Fit can't now be alone, cuz he connected with people. This server, though is full of secrets, lies and danger, is still a paradise. A heaven on earth for a lonely man...

So the last part of this long ahh post is about his desire. The one thing that convinced Fit to go to qsmp. Freedom. Which he doesn't have. By making this deal with Contractor he fell into the trap. He must to find this player data, or else he'll return to the world he tried to escape. For forever. With no way out. But once he came to the server, Cucurucho will never let him go. So he's now in double trap. Yet the biggest trap is Ramon. He's prepared to sacrifice everything for his baby boy, and can't leave the island without him. And without Ramon Fit wouldn't be able to contact the contractor. So in creating connections, Fit traps himself further.

I can't really call it a character analysis, but it's all I see in Fit's lore. A very lonely war criminal, that got so tired of distrust and destruction, that he agreed on a spy mission. But once his mission started he learned how to love and care, that he trapped himself further. Love isn't a miracle that saves you, but it's a very useful tool. Once you learn to understand and reciprocate it, life may become better. (Sorry, it's super cheesy, but I think it encompasses Fits character very good) .

Fit is a spy. They're not supposed to have a family and love, because they can't stay for long. And I think at first, Fit saw everything and everyone as just a means to an end. Just the player data. But after all that has passed he can't be the same. He has a son, friends and a possible love interest. Will he be able to still continue his mission? Will he still betray them and they're trust? I don't know.

But I now I love how cc! Fit does his lore. It isn't so in the face and doesn't affects other, yet it is so layered. Everything is so important down to the music choice aaaaagh. I don't even pretend to analyse everything in his lore like contractor, memory loss, head aches and ect.

I just love it. It's marvelous.

Ok, fellas, are ya ready for the part two of my Fit post?

Actually, @sundropsimp (sorry for tagging) gave me this idea and made me reciprocate on something I thought about for a long time, but never got the chance to speak about. So, I might see some deeper meaning in nothing, but I think qFit tries very hardly to separate himself from 2b2t.

Like, instead of destroying he repaires/builds; instead of hiding and going from place to place, he stays, makes himself his forever home; instead of distrusting, he finds friends and even a son. He desperately tries to better himself, yet there's one interesting thing.

Remember in my last post abt Fit I listed three specific people. Philza, Pac and Ramon. I think they're a very crucial people in his life, a pillars that help this veteran to grow and progress.

But the moment he lost them all, he jumps right back into his old habits. Once there was a stream where Fit went to the ship, where Ramon lost his first life, and burned this place to the ground. Why do I call it strange, if Fit is quite chaotic? Well, it's because smt in this moment felt different. Then after some long time he was truly alone. His son was kidnapped, so was Philza (or he wasn't online, can't remember), and Pac wasn't on server to keep Fit company. He wanted to let his frustration out and in doing so he regressed to his old self. Convincing himself it's a normal reaction, fighting and mocking his enemies (not jokingly as usual, but like very hard) and burned this ship to the crisp, laughing. I dunno if it was intentional or not, but I feel this moment shows how easy it is for Fit to return to his 2b2t self without his loved ones. I don't think it was intentional, but I like it.

(Also, as a (platonic) Fitza enjoyer and Fitpac fan I adored their venture together today. Like, Fit and Pac seeing what a bad state Phil is letting him join, even if it meant no date for them. And then they three watched a sunset together and hugged.... They're just too precious to me.)

Will you believe me, when i say i tried my best?

Theyre very precious to me, and u cant convince me its not how they were sitting.

Honestly I just poored some of my hcs. Hide duo holding hands (normal + prosthetic), Fit always puts his hand on Phils shoulderwhen the latter is sad, and in return crow father hugs him back:D

i love them

I was too tired to stay on Philza's stream... But I am winning, ok?

Fitza staying as strong as ever.

I'll talk a bit about purgatory, since I didn't have time while it was happening.

During the purgatory, we all were thinking that Wallflower duo was dying, cuz they both hunt each other down, but in reality they only got stronger! They are one of the few duos who could kill each other and still stay besties for life. Closer to the end of the Purgatory, they met up and threw a dice together, laughing and joking. Even hugging!! They were in different teams, yet they still hugged and respected each other so much. The Eye B_tch tried to break Fitza up, but their not so platonic duo was stronger than that.

I think it's a stretch, but I felt very warm, when Phil woke up and called for Fit first. I dunno why, but they are very dear to me. Fit is Phil's closest friend and vice versa. So Phil waking up and seeking Fit is so sweet.

And now to yesterday's stream. I didn't watched it all, but I've had enough moments to speak of. Firstly, Fit greeting Philza right when the latter logged in, as they did wayy back, in the first few months of qsmp. Then Phil shows his crows his wings for the first time, which was already huge af. But then he trusted Fit enough to show them to him. And in reality, Phil just showed his greatest vulnerability and insecurity to this specific person, and if it's not the biggest gesture of trust I don't know what is. After Purgatory, they both were supposed to be colder to and be wary of each other, but no. They still confide in each other, being the most honest they can. Fit even apologized. And when Dadza called himself a dumbass, Fit quickly said he isn't one. I love them.

And then Phil and Fit spent a lot of time together, as they did before. Walking, talking, cleaning the server for their kids, joking about each other's d_c-. They're calm around each other, cuz they've known each other for years. I think it's a stretch once again, but I feel that Phil would show his wings to Fit first even if he had a choice.

And again, if we're going back more, when Phil saw the picture of the skull and called for Fit, the latter came almost immediately. After Crow started saying "stupid... Stupid bird brain" 2b2t veteran informed that he believed in existence of skull picture. War criminal sees that dadza starts to doubt in himself, so he reassures him and lets him join him and Pac in the dungeon. Putting friends before roommates (they are so gay, why is Fit in denial... No matter how jacked he is he can't beat Fitpac allegations).

They rotate in my head every second of the day. Their friendship is stronger than anything. If the world came crushing down, they're gonna be together. If one's in trouble the other is already planning the rescue mission. They know each other for a long time, they know how ruthless they can be, but they aren't afraid. They're here for each other. They put their trust in each other, giving each other access to private chambers (Fit's secret bedroom and kid's basement). They're prepared to break the rules, put oneself on the line for the other's sake. They even share illegal stuff with each other. Fit is bullets for Philza's gun. The best duo ever.

Phil showing Fit his wings means so much to me- like- my boys :((

It means that Phil still trusts Fit even after purgatory and just- sobs

Sonner or later I'll become that one Fitza guy on Tumblr, but I just can't stop.

I wish I had time, strength or skill to give them justice. So anyway here's some of my favorite Fitza moments.

🥚QSMP 🥚- The Great Journey - Philza VOD - Streamed on April 5 2023 3:03:47 and everything forward.

QSMP - Empty nest and empty heart - Philza VOD - Streamed on November 1 2023 1:37:15 everything forward (the infamous gun and bullets scene, terribly depicted above. They're so agh... I love them)

QSMP - Guy Fawkes Night & Dia de Muertos! - Philza VOD - Streamed on November 3 2023 2:56:19 ("it would be an honor, it would be an honor if you would join me, King")

Hardcore & QSMP - Finding the line... - Philza VOD - Streamed on October 27 2023

Why do they have to be so extra....

Also. I left these tags under @mossdontknowwhattheydoin (sorry for tagging) but I wanted to share them.

I really love how they allow each other AND themselves to be vulnerable around each other. Never have one of them poked and made fun for something deeply emotional. Way back when eggs were kidnapped for the first time, Fit and Phil always stuck together, supporting each other in these hard times. They stayed close, and even their eggs did. I clearly remember a stream, where Big Q tried to kidnap Tallulah, and while parents were trying to lead him away, Chay, Ramon and Dapper were protecting her, building double walls and panic rooms.

And I think Fit really feels like home around Phil and vice versa. ( Proof: Hardcore & QSMP - Finding the line... - Philza VOD - Streamed on October 27 2023) Sometimes, when Phil just builds and does nothing more, Fit drops by, talking, observing and talking.

And boy oh boy, should I even try to recite all their gayness?

"Sorry, Fit I got lost in your eyes.."

"We're really close, Phil"

"Not in front of the kids"

"Fit Mc of 2b2t is an amazing lover and a great man, so muscley, so fantastic. Also I guess he is good at cleaning? Yeah."

I love them being friends, who act gay and like an embarrassing parents to Tubbo. They're the gayest straight dudes (although Fit is canonically gay) and they make it work.

Can you believe Philza went through nearly all of Purgatory without his emotional support bald man?

You may be a Fitza guy, but I am as well. Phil has my favorite duos and it is t even funny, but maybe biased… anyways, what’s your favorite Fitza quote that’s just gay for no reason? Personal favorite was something along the lines of

“Did I steal anything else from you?” - Fit

“My heart.” - Phil

I’m rambling now so don’t mind me-

I love these two, I watch Phil so just seeing these interactions are the best. He’s such a social guy but secluded himself to hardcore-

I feel like the QSMP showed a much different perspective on the two, how they take lore wise and as friends. They have such a close bond that they act so gay without somehow making it romantic and I love them-

Hii! Thank you for asking, fellow Fitza enjoyer!

Don't get me started. Man, I can go all the way and even give some receipts.

"Philza Mincraft is laying some pipes!" Philza VOD April 10 2023.

"We're so close"/" Don't mention it" I don't remember where it's from honestly.

"Not in front of kids, Fit" I don't remember where it's from, but it was said more than once.

"I got lost in your eyes" Phil to Fit.

"Fit Mc of 2b2t is an amazing lover and a great man, so muscley, so fantastic. Also I guess he is good at cleaning? Yeah."

An here's not so gay, but really friendship goals quotes.

"You and I.. We walk into churches and they burn down just by our presence." 10/4/2023 stream Philza Vod.

"I believe you, Phil" "You're not just saying that?" "Of course not!" 10/30/2023 Philza vod.

"You're too good to me, Phil"

"Fit, let me just add you to this stupid thing [gives access to the basement with Tallulah's farm]." "Oh, yeah, thank you" "It's been too long and you did just not had the access to it." "Thank you, means the world" 12/6/2023 Philza VOD.

"It's okay. We're gonna work through this together. We're gonna figure out what's happening. We got this." Fit about Crow's nightmares [fit is just a free therapy]. 09/25/2023 Philza VOD (this line is so powerful, so here's even a timestamp 3:26:49)

I'm not sure it's what you expected, Anon, but I hope I gave you something to work with:]

To guns and bullets

Summary: After a purgatory, while the survivors float on the ship, away from the hell, one Islander didn't go to sleep. Philza noticed that Fit stayed on the bow of the boat. The wise crow couldn't go to sleep, without checking on everyone's safety.

(Heavily inspired by "Two slow dancers" By Mitski and "Everything stays" From Adventure time)

The round moon rose, shining down on the deep ocean with a ship, flowing through the calm waves. The vessel sweetly rocked, lulling its passengers. All of them were exhausted. The last two weeks were very stressful for the players, and this last minute escape had taken all their remaining strengths away. At the evening, After some long talk, bruised survivors went to the cabins, where all of the beds were. This whole ordeal has taken a toll on their mental health, but despite the distrust this event was supposed to cause, players couldn't stay alone. Mouse, whose beautiful pink pigtails tangled and had some sticks in them, asked Bagi to sleep in the same room. The latter agreed, looking exhausted. Her hair were still wet from falling in the ocean, her head hurt from that too. Some scars from battles reopened, so brown haired woman decided to head out earlier. The girls said their goodbyes, and then left. Philza checked on them later at night, and they were sleeping anxiously.

Charlie proposed staying with Roier. Slime looked severely dehydrated; his more slime-like parts started to crack. He himself was half covered in mud and his corrupted parts were blinking a bit. Phil wasn't sure why, but he thought that it was probably due to the goopy guy's instability. Corruption didn't spread since he wasn't in contact with his "daughter", but the damage caused by purgatory didn't let those scars heal. The spider hybrid looked ghostly. His eyes were blank, he was heartbroken and pale. The Mexican man was trembling, as he repeated the last message his husband send to him. Roier wasn't really in the conversation, until Charlie didn't place his hand on spider's back and take him to their cabin. After checking on Bagi and Mouse, Crow father knocked on their door. Slime was quietly snoring, while Roier was staring at the ceiling. The latter didn't respond after the blonde man called for him. Philza didn't know what to do, but felt terrible for his friends.

The last one to go was Tubbo. His shirt and jeans were torn, his hair was messy. Toby's goggles were cracked, and his usually happy eyes were now dark and tired. Him and Phil discussed all they've seen today or done. The younger boy was full of ideas, yet his strengths were no more. After he started bringing up the same points like a broken record, Crow suggested Tubbo to sleep. As every other player before he didn't want to go to bed alone, for the loneliness was terrifying. Dadza promised to share a room with him, after he would check on everyone. This seemed to be a good compromise, cuz after this preposition youngster begrudgingly headed out for the night. Few minutes later, Phil went through corridor, looking in every room and heard a loud snore from Toby's. The last cabin Crow checked was Pac's. He was sleeping even before today's event and was brought aboard by Fit. The black haired man was sleeping. As everyone he was battered and his night wasn't sound. He twitched a bit, and it seemed like he was having a nightmare.

After some time, night came and the darkness spread around the ship. Yet the winged man couldn't go to sleep. The aforementioned Fit was not in any of the cabins. He also wasn't in the main area and corridors. Phil wasn't able to relax before everyone was safe and sound. Crow came out on the board, before seeing a little smoke coming from the stern. The winged man made his way there, as the stars shined. When he got there his friend turned his head to him. But once he saw who stood before him, bald man quickly turned away.

"Haven't seen you smoking for a lifetime."

Fit didn't respond to this half baked joke, but only hid his face more.

"Mind if I sit with you?"

"Be my guest." The veteran said finally. His voice was raspy, for he haven't spoken a word since confronting Tubbo a few hours back. At that time he looked furious, beaming with surpressed feelings of loss and uncertainty. But now bald man sat quietly, slowly holding a cigarette to his moth.

Winged man sat near his friend, avoiding pressing his back against the wall. Only now Phil noticed some cracks on the railings and the floor of the ship. The wise crow didn't remember them being there, when the remains of once happy group got to their salvation.

"What happened here?"

"Nothing but a cosmetic damage." Fit replied, pressing a cigarette to his lips once again. Philza couldn't not notice his brother in arm's human hand bleeding, as the knuckles were scratched.

"Are you okay?"

"As good as can be," he interrupted. "You?"

"Shitty." There was no point in lying. The wise crow looked exhausted. His black haori and green jinbei were dirty and torn. The blond man's back and wings were bleeding and brought terrible pain. "This whole purgatory thing.... It was hard. Being a leader of the team and fight for survival isn't quite what I do."

"Don't cut yourself short, Phil, you're the best at surviving."

"It's one thing surviving alone, but having to look out for a whole team is a different experience."

"You did good." Fit insisted, pressing a cigarette to his mouth once again. He was still facing the different direction.

"But I wish I could've done more." Philza confessed. Something made him trust this man. "I couldn't bear hearing them asking for directions, especially when the eggs.. When the earthquake began."

"Nobody knew what to do." The veteran's voice cracked a little, but he quickly tried to get it back to normal. "Don't blame yourself for not knowing everything."

"..thank you..shit, can I have a smoke?"

Fit was visibly surprised. "You always hated smoking."

"It's been the worst week I had, I really need something to distract me."

The bald man gave in, handing him the small hand made cig, that he was smoking just a second ago.

"It's the only one I have."

"Thank you."

Phil pressed the cigarette to his lips and puffed. "Where are Chayanne and Tallulah? Are they safe or at least alive? How's the rest of team BOLAS? Was all of this carnage worth it?" He wondered. The thoughts of pain and loss were suppressed by the prickly feeling in his mouth and lungs. The flaming smoke filled his mouth and the crow started coughing profusely. With every new cough Crow was more and more sure that this was a bad idea. His eyes started watering, as he nearly threw his own lungs out. Through the noise, winged man heard a chuckle coming from his trusted friend.

"Times changed, yet your relationship with cigarettes didn't." Fit reached out his normal hand, waiting for Phil to give his "distraction" back.

"It tastes like shit. How are you even able to smoke it for so long?" Crowza blurted out, as his cough started decreasing.

"Back on Earth smp I smoked more than one a day. Destroyed my lungs a bit, but I got used to it quickly. This smoke is almost the same as the air on 2b2t."

"Really? Was it that bad?"

"Pretty much. Daily explosions and withers played their part. It was hard for me to breathe at first on Earth smp, cuz the air was so clear." Fit made another puff.

"I miss this server. Remember Antarctic Empire?"

"I'll never forget you and Techno took over the world. No one even stood a chance." Finally bald man turned his head enough for Phil to see his friend's eye. Only now the child of the sky noticed a bloody scar, going through the eye. The streak of red liquid flowed down the cheek. "Do you remember our first meeting though?"

"Oh, yeah. You sure made an impression. Showing up out of nowhere on a plane and suggesting to become a «sacrifice for the blood god in the name of science»." Philza chuckled, remembering this scene vividly.

"I did, didn't I?" Fit was also smiling a bit. "Well, we had to find out how much points we lose somehow! And it led to the greatest alliance ever." The last words were spoken with so much hidden warmth only a close friend would feel.

"True." Phil sensed it.

"Besides, the planes weren't such a bad idea due to how far away your empire was from Florida kingdom. Not all of us were blessed with the wings."

"Yeah.." The last part stung a lot, but the man in haori didn't blame Fit. ".....god, I miss this place."

"Me too." The expression on bald man's face became more bittersweet. "One of my favorite memories of earth smp is us flying together. You on your own and me on the plane... Remember?"

Philza did remember. He remembered the ocean of stars that is the night sky spread above him, as he flew. The wind tickled the face and ruffled every feather. Crow's blonde hair and clothes were blowing in the wind. He was cold, since he was very fast, but it didn't matter. The round moon up high shone down on the biggest smile on the face of the child of the sky. The paysage below changed from stunningly lonley whiteness of the snows of Antarctic Empire and its castles, villages and farms to the green of the taïga and its spruces. The glimpse of county Phil built with his friends brought him unimaginable joy. He felt freedom, he felt happy. The far stars reflected in the blue eyes, as they watched the greatness of the view above, and winged man felt this greatness in himself. This was a sensation of unimaginable power, as if the world itself was plased in the hand of the feathered one.

Angel of death couldn't hear much, as the air he was cutting through was noisy, but after a while the new loud sound entered Phil's calm night. The man with wings black as coal looked around, but the clouds didn't let him see much. After a few minutes a noise became louder, and just as Crowza began to panic, a giant ass plane emerged from the white mass of gaz to the left of a person. Angel of death flew away to the right, still trying to process this unexpected situation. The plane was brown and had no roof. The pilot was covered by shadow of a supporting plane, and crow couldn't see who he was. But before Phil could think more, the steal arm with gravure on it popped right out of the darkness in a sign of greeting. All the confusion went away and was replaced by a playfulness. After a few seconds Fit clenched his hand into a fist, proposing to do their special move. Carefully winged man got closer to his companion and fist bumped him. Oh how Phil missed these silly gestures and games they used to play. The angel of death decided to toy a little, so, with the largest grin on his face, he swooped down, got under the plane, and surfaced to the other side of the steel bird. The shadow of the man in the flying machine started to look around, trying to spot his companion. Phil chuckled and knocked on the steal. Fit twitched and declined overly dramatically. Then they began swerving and turning, playfully raced. Oh how they both missed these times. The times of freedom and youth. Veterans didn't need to see each other's faces or hear each other's voices to know, that they both laughed

"You didn't have this scar then, didn't you?" The child of the sky pointed at the burn scar on his friend's cheek.

"Yeah, that was from an end crystal. Got it about 2 years after we said our goodbyes. You changed too. You've got some more wrinkles."

"Oh fuck off!"

They both chuckled and right after they fell silent for a bit. This quietness, that was interrupted by the sound of waves punching the steal of the ship, was very bittersweet. Veterans looked in the sky, reminiscing this moment. Yet they weren't like that anymore. The past would never return.

"It was so much easier back then, wasn't it?" Phil broke the silence. "We weren't stuck and were free to do whatever we wanted to...."

"...yeah." Veteran said that with some darkness. "I miss the simplicity too. But I somehow love this island too."

"Really?"

"Yeah..." Fit thought for a bit, spinning a cigarette around in his arm, before putting it back in his mouth. "It gifted me a lot. It's calmer than 2b2t ever was. It's still a shithole, but... I like it. At the end of the day, I never thought I'd see you again. Qsmp let me reconnect with you and find new people. And it gave me Ramon."

Winged man knew his companion didn't lie. As much as Fit hated being emotional and vulnerable, he found strengths to confide in people. Phil found it very brave and felt warmer, knowing that his own immense trust was reciprocated. At the same time crow understood his friend's feelings. Phil hated this island with its monsters and Federation with burning passion. But he was also grateful for all the fun memories, for his new family, for Forever, for bond with Étoiles, for Missa's company, for Fit's unwavering loyalty and most importantly for Chayanne and Tallulah. They were his light, his reason. There was nothing the child of the sky loved more, than to wake up and see kids peacefully sleeping or planning their next adventure. This server brought so much pain and suffering, yet found the way to give so much more happiness.

"I understand this feeling. I hate feds, codes and whatever the fuck this Eye dude was, but I love everything else. Chayanne and Tallulah are the best that ever happened to me...... Wonder where they are..." Philza's voice trembled, as the worries came back in his mind. His heart ached, for he couldn't bear staying in unknown, having no idea of the kids' whereabouts. "Do you believe...?"

"That they're alive? Yeah, our kids are sturdy." That was dishonest. Fit had the same questions and no answers. But he tried to reassure his friend and himself.

"But.. What if this Eye motherfucker did something to them? And what about the bomb?" Blonde man started speaking faster, as a confusion mixed with slight panic began to overflow.

"Phil, they're dragon eggs. They've been through a lot, I believe in them."

"But not an atomic bomb! And this eye bitch was in the same room as Chay, what if he did something to him? And Lullah... She probably.."

Suddenly Phil felt something on his back. The warm hand was placed in between his shoulder blades, at the roots of his wings. Crow looked at his friend, who was now fully turned at him. His deep brown eyes looked calm, reassuringly. Now that the other part of the face was visible, the blonde man understood why this man was turning away. Right above his left eye was a big scar, which bled down the cheek. But it wasn't something he would hide. The long, lonely stain coming from the corner of the eye, that was the vulnerability he tried to disguise. This single tear, that was now dried, divided the pool of red substance. Yet bald man now fully focused on the child of the sky. His palm soothed the man and ceased the fear in him. The warmth of this gesture and a slight pain pulled crowza back to reality.

"Phil, look at me. We don't know if they are alive, but we don't know the opposite. It's like that schrodinger cat shtick. We can't do anything but wait. Let's just believe in positive.. Ok?"

Man in black haori looked back at his friend's eyes. His own blue ones flickered, and he quietly nodded. There really was no proof that the kids were dead, for no one saw any corpses. And despite scary thoughts still plaguing his mind, Phil chose to trust Fit's judgement.

"Thank you, Fit.. Sorry for all the waterworks, it's just too much, you know.."

"Don't worry, it's okay. I feel the same.. This purgatory really did number on our psyche... Hm?" The veteran pulled his hand back, after sensing something liquid on his fingers.

"The fuck is it?"

"My wings broke during the escape. They just started to heal, when we had to leave, and they weren't prepared to carry both mine and Toby's weight."

The bald man looked at his palm for a second, before wiping this bodily fluid on his pants. Then he reached for a backpack, that was on his left to take something out. Only now Phil realized that during their whole conversation Fit exclusively used his human arm and let his prosthetic one stay unmoved.

"What's up with your left arm?" Crowza asked, watching his friend struggle to open a bag with one hand.

"It's..." For a few seconds baldie tensed his muscles up. His body trembled a bit, but his prosthetic arm barely moved a finger. "It broke down during the earthquake. I kinda neglected maintaining it occasionally." He resumed his search.

"We can tell Tubbo. He can do some magic with create or something.."

"Nah, I'll give it to Ramon once he gets back."

"Then I'll wait for Lullah to finish her sanctuary. Plus I must show Chay Halloween decorations."

After a few more seconds Fit fished out something sparkly. It was a golden Apple.

"Here, take it. Stops the bleeding and blocks the pain like a charm."

"No, I can't take it!" Phil was unimaginably grateful, yet he couldn't accept this gift, considering the state his friend was in. "You have your own open wounds! Eat it yourself, king."

"It's not the first time I had more holes than usual."

"Heal yourself first."

"It's my last gapple."

"I can't—"

"For fucks sake. I insist, and I won't take no for an answer." The annoyance appeared clearly on the scarred face.

"......thank you." Phil finally took the offer, begrudgingly. He was still a bit shocked that cold survivalist of the toxic wasteland would give away the healing so easily.

"Hey, wanna make a toast?" Veteran said, taking his cigarette out of his mouth and bringing it closer to his best friend.

"For what? Our kids?" Winged man put gapple to cigar.

"Yeah, for their well being and safe return."

"Huh, of course. And, for guns and bullets." Philza smiled, looking right into Fit's brown eyes.

"For guns and bullets." The same tired smile appeared on bald man's face, as he knew what his friend referenced.

Veterans "clinked" their possession. Crowza took a bite out of the golden apple and 2b2t's warrior puffed, sealing their toast. Man in haori felt warmth spread in his body, closing his wounds and fixing his broken bones. Gapple really was a great pain killer, and with pain all remaining powers left Phil. He was so tired, that it was very hard to stay awake. The child of the sky wearily put his head on a shoulder of his bullet.

"Sorry, eepy."

"No problem." The gun felt weight added to his head. They both began looking at the moon and an ocean of stars, that surrounded it. They didn't need words to understand each other, as they sat in this weird hug.

"I don't want to lose you." These words were spoken so quietly, that only blondie could hear them. "Never would imagine I'd miss you so much after only few weeks."

"Don't worry. I don't want to leave without you too. Heh, you're my most trusted friend. Thank you for believing every time, by the way. I'd go mad without your support, king."

"You're too good to me, Phil. I've known you for way too long to dismiss your visions. Thank you for trusting me and sharing info."

They chuckled. Now they were the most vulnerable they've ever been, yet they felt no discomfort. After this concert they knew that they had each other. From the start they wouldn't leave another one in danger. Since the very first day on the train, since the adoption, since the first egg disappearance, since all the adventures and campings, since every little bad and good things that happened, Phil and Fit stayed together. If someday they'd have to fight the codes or feds again, guns and bullets would immediately connect and come up with a plan. Phil was sure that if him and Fit entered the fire, they'd come out with no burns. And veteran was sure, that, in case of death, the hell was waiting on both of them.

After a few minutes, Phil finally decided to go to sleep. "Let's head out. Tubbo will kill me, if i don't keep my promise. Plus Pac waits for you."

"What do you mean?" The slight blush appeared on bald man's face, as he stood up.

"Pac's cabin has an extra bed. Now you'll finally be actual roommates." Crowza smiled sassy.

Man with a prosthetic arm wanted to response, but just as he opened his mouth, his leg suddenly bended. The child of the sky quickly stabilized his friend. 

"Concussion." Fit responded to an unasked question. 

After they got to their rooms, and hugged before heading out to their own beds. 

Winged man fell in his bed, feeling totally exhausted. He quickly drifted off to sleep, listening to loud snores of the youngster. Finally, Crow could sleep, since everyone was safe. And Philza was safe too. 

Here's some art I made about my fanfic awhile ago