Sad Thing About Being A Johnny Ghost Fictive:

Sad thing about being a Johnny Ghost fictive:

The fear of birds is still very much present.

Went to the beach for vacation with family and friends for a week.

Birds everywhere. One almost took my head off. We even went to the Rainforest thing at the zoo where the birds are literally loose around the enclosure and you walk around and these things were so fucking terrifying.

I literally took a break from front because family and friends were also making fun of my fear (and applying it to our singletsona so… fun…)

Literally it was so fucking traumatizing ;-;

-🩶👻

Us: posts on TikTok a long time ago showing some system things

TikTok: We’re gonna show this to all of your classmates and friends that have no idea you’re a system and will likely judge you harshly about it

Us: Why…

(Based off a true story where many classmates have viewed our SUPPOSED TO BE ANONYMOUS TikTok that we don’t even use or post on… and we don’t know if they’ve figured out it’s us or not. Shit’s scary)

-🩶👻

dissociative experiences scale 2

The DES is such a fun diagnostic tool. I've had a couple of therapists and psychiatrists administer it to me. It's an empirically tested scale that gets a feel for tbe magnitude of a person's dissociation.

I score differently depending on alter (they reason what each question means and how frequently it occurs differently) but usually score in the 45 to 65 range. When I was younger my scores were generally in the 60 to 80 range. Progress!?

I used to score high on questions like dissociating so hard you literally see yourself in the third person and you are approached by people you don't recognize who know you, but I very rarely experience that anymore. I keep forgetting about the experience of seeing myself in the third person during dissociative episodes - that was such a severe symptom that I used to occasionally experience.

For anyone interested in taking it, you can take it here. Today, I obtained a 66. I have been unusually stressed lately.

Trauma dissociation

Dissociative Experiences Scale - II

Self-assessment tool for Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, DDNOS (OSDD), and PTSD. DES scoring explained. Try it today.

The website has some interesting information on here. In studies, certain mental illnesses were associated with certain scores.

>!Dissociative Experiences Scale Scores

Explained High and Low DES Scores

High levels of dissociation are indicated by scores of 30 or more, scores under 30 indicate low levels. Successful treatment of a dissociative disorder should reduce the DES score when compared to the result before treatment began. Very high scores do not necessarily mean a more severe dissociative disorder is present, this is because the scale measures both normal and pathological dissociation.

Dissociative Identity Disorder and the DES

Only 1% of people with Dissociative Identity Disorder have been found to have a DES score below 30. A very high number of people who score above 30 have been shown to have Posttraumatic Stress Disorder or a dissociative disorder other than Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Clinical Uses of the Dissociative Experiences Scale

If a person scores in the high range (above 30) then the DES questions can be used as the basis for a clinical interview, with the clinician asking the client to describe examples of the experiences they have had for any questions about experiences which occur 20% of the time or more. Alternatively, the Dissociative Disorders Interview Schedule (DDIS) or Structured Clinical Interview for Dissociative Disorders (SCID-D) can be used to reach a diagnosis.

Average DES Scores in research:

General Adult Population 5.4

Anxiety Disorders 7.0

Affective Disorders 9.35

Eating Disorders 15.8

Late Adolescence 16.6

Schizophrenia 15.4

Borderline Personality Disorder 19.2

Posttraumatic Stress Disorder 31

Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified 36

Dissociative Identity Disorder (MPD) 48!<

God bless people who are simply respectful towards systems and their headmates, because I have no fucking clue what I'd do without y'all.

Respect introjects whose source is an AU challenge GO

-Mossflower, they/it/ey/fleur/snow

I drew myself as I am now in headspace.

Being a factive is super hard… especially when my source caused so much trauma for us (sadly, all of what my source had done was unintentional and with 0 malicious intent).

It… sucks. Knowing that my source is a real person out there living his life, completely unaware of everything we’ve gone through. Especially since he blocked us.

No one else in the system might hold resentment towards him, but I do. You might be able to tell who he is, since my art style is… really similar to his. Or at least how his was when we knew him.

It really sucks knowing what he’s gone through, and having my own ideas of what he’s currently going through. Knowing how badly my headmates want to contact him because they’re so worried about him. I completely understand.

It just sucks knowing that I’m just a copy of him formed because of the trauma he and his boyfriend caused us.

While we struggle and attempt to find a way to get better, to heal from the past trauma and attempt to build connections with people that might actually last, they have no idea. They don’t know what they did to us, do they? They have no idea how many nightmares our host has had about it. About the random triggers we find. About the things we can no longer enjoy because of the trauma they caused us.

We had a panic attack when going to see the FNaF movie, something people in this system have been looking forward to for 8 years, because of what they did. Because of the hurt they inflicted.

Ghost feels he can’t enjoy Taleblr anymore because of the hurt they inflicted. Blue handed him the TMNTPIE AU not only to focus more on the AFF, but because Taleblr is a source of trauma for us now because of what they did.

And knowing that my source was one of the causes for all of this… it hurts… especially when everyone here treats me so kindly… Blue and Ghost both call me their little sister. And I’m very grateful for that…

I just wish so badly that my source didn’t do this shit to us.

-🧸