I Drew Myself As I Am Now In Headspace.

I drew myself as I am now in headspace.

Being a factive is super hard… especially when my source caused so much trauma for us (sadly, all of what my source had done was unintentional and with 0 malicious intent).

It… sucks. Knowing that my source is a real person out there living his life, completely unaware of everything we’ve gone through. Especially since he blocked us.

No one else in the system might hold resentment towards him, but I do. You might be able to tell who he is, since my art style is… really similar to his. Or at least how his was when we knew him.

It really sucks knowing what he’s gone through, and having my own ideas of what he’s currently going through. Knowing how badly my headmates want to contact him because they’re so worried about him. I completely understand.

It just sucks knowing that I’m just a copy of him formed because of the trauma he and his boyfriend caused us.

While we struggle and attempt to find a way to get better, to heal from the past trauma and attempt to build connections with people that might actually last, they have no idea. They don’t know what they did to us, do they? They have no idea how many nightmares our host has had about it. About the random triggers we find. About the things we can no longer enjoy because of the trauma they caused us.

We had a panic attack when going to see the FNaF movie, something people in this system have been looking forward to for 8 years, because of what they did. Because of the hurt they inflicted.

Ghost feels he can’t enjoy Taleblr anymore because of the hurt they inflicted. Blue handed him the TMNTPIE AU not only to focus more on the AFF, but because Taleblr is a source of trauma for us now because of what they did.

And knowing that my source was one of the causes for all of this… it hurts… especially when everyone here treats me so kindly… Blue and Ghost both call me their little sister. And I’m very grateful for that…

I just wish so badly that my source didn’t do this shit to us.

-🧸

Us: posts on TikTok a long time ago showing some system things

TikTok: We’re gonna show this to all of your classmates and friends that have no idea you’re a system and will likely judge you harshly about it

Us: Why…

(Based off a true story where many classmates have viewed our SUPPOSED TO BE ANONYMOUS TikTok that we don’t even use or post on… and we don’t know if they’ve figured out it’s us or not. Shit’s scary)

-🩶👻

Remember when we said we were gonna participate in talevember?

What a fucking lie that was, huh? :D

-🩶👻

Just wanna make something clear about this blog: as long as you are not physically or emotionally hurting someone else, we do not care what you do or who you are.

No matter

Gender

Race

Ethnicity

Sexuality

Religion

Whether you’re a system

Or a singlet

what type of system you are

what type of alter you are

We don’t care. Live your life. Live and let live. You are safe here.

Just as long as you are respectful towards others, don’t physically hurt others, or are not emotionally abusing others, we’re cool.

We are not pro or anti anything unless that thing involves any sort of actual harm.

You are not safe if you are: transphobic, racist, homophobic, against LGBT+ rights, against systems, or hurt/harass others because they don’t share the same beliefs as you. (If you were this way in the past but have bettered yourself and no longer think that way, don’t worry you’re cool :) )

-🍓

Hardest thing about being a system rn:

We gotta do so much self reflection rn for a school project and we need to reflect on our life and we’re like…

“We don’t remember that part…”

So… we might be outed as a system to our entire class y’all 😓

-🩶👻

And people wonder why I call them the kindest and best person I’ve ever known

-📖

Just wanna make something clear about this blog: as long as you are not physically or emotionally hurting someone else, we do not care what you do or who you are.

No matter

Gender

Race

Ethnicity

Sexuality

Religion

Whether you’re a system

Or a singlet

what type of system you are

what type of alter you are

We don’t care. Live your life. Live and let live. You are safe here.

Just as long as you are respectful towards others, don’t physically hurt others, or are not emotionally abusing others, we’re cool.

We are not pro or anti anything unless that thing involves any sort of actual harm.

You are not safe if you are: transphobic, racist, homophobic, against LGBT+ rights, against systems, or hurt/harass others because they don’t share the same beliefs as you. (If you were this way in the past but have bettered yourself and no longer think that way, don’t worry you’re cool :) )

-🍓