Not His Fault Lex Stopped Growing Hair

Not his fault Lex stopped growing hair

Batfam + Co as conversations my friends and I have pt. 1

*over text*

Wally: Agreed? 🤝

Dick: Agreed ✨🤝✨

Wally: Ah fuck

Wally: You got glitter on my hand

Dick: B-but it's gay-

Wally: 🌈The gay touch🌈

Dick: Like King Midas

Wally: King Midas but h o m o s e g g s u a l-

if we lived in a world where u had to do the career u were first interested in as a child what would u be doing, id be a firefighter

Alfred and Barbara (Oracle) bonding bc they sit behind screens while their fam gets beaten up and stuff? Its kinda vague

I did this with just Bruce and Dick being mentioned but it would go on into the entire family. (I made Barbara and Bruce have a sibling-like relationship because I feel like that would work so well with this kind of thing, and besides Aunt Barbara would be such a cute concept)

Barbara sighed and felt like shaming her head down on the table. 

"Something wrong, Miss Barbara?" She turned to the old man and shrugged, 

"They're idiots. All of them. They are going to get themselves killed!" She said, turning on the comms long enough for Alfred to hear the commotion from the Battle that Robin and Batman were currently in. 

Alfred set down the tray of tea and rested his hand on her shoulder, 

"Ah yes, they have a terrible disease when it comes to that. Have had it for years." She looked up at him and raised her eyebrow, 

"What disease?"

"Dumbass disease, Miss Barbara, and it's fatal."

His comment started making more and more sense as she did more and more Oracle work. The boys would come home with broken ribs, broken limbs, bruises to high hell, and even one time Bruce broker his fucking spine. 

Barbara (and Alfred too, except she's pretty sure he's an immortal god)  will die from worry and stress one day, and it'll be all her pseudo-brother and nephew's fault. 

I am convinced that if damian had joined the fam as a toddler dick at SOME POINT would have uttered the phrase “biting is how he shows his affection! It means he likes you!” There is nothing anyone can do to change my mind on this

Holy shit. THIS. THIS IS GENIUS.

I don't wanna write about this, I just want to discuss this. It would totally happen! Plus baby damian is just ashjdmkjxhhs.

I actually just saw a tiktok that was like "go up to your kid and stick your hand out, see what they do", and the kid just bit her parent's hand and

That's something damian would do and it'd be so fucking cute. Especially if Damian does it trying to be aggressive but he doesn't have hardly any teeth and it becomes the family's joke.

mutuals