Sometimes I Wonder Why Im Exhausted All The Time Then I Remember That I Wake Up A Bajillion Times Every

Sometimes I wonder why I’m exhausted all the time then I remember that I wake up a bajillion times every night feeling extremely nauseous and in so much pain that I can’t sleep for several hours

stop villanizing disabled people. stop assuming we're just being lazy. stop assuming we could be trying harder. stop assuming that we'll "feel better" in a few weeks. stop assuming that we have the same energy levels as everyone else. thanks for coming to my ted talk.

Long post incoming…

Long story short I went to Disney and was denied accommodations which made my experience and my friends experience (who are also like me autistic or have a lot of sensory issues) a lot more difficult and quite frankly a bit miserable. I was given no explanation or anything as for why we were denied.

Anyway I’m annoyed so yeah. Feel free to share any opinions or ideas or experiences yall might have I want to read them.

Below the cut is a long explanation

Ok so I went to Disney world last week and I was denied the DAS pass and I really do not understand why. I am autistic and have a lot of sensory issues which make waiting in long lines physically extremely difficult. This honestly is a bit ironic because my friends and I had to wait 2 hours in a line to even talk to someone about the DAS pass. Thankfully I had gotten a wheel chair to help with my other disabilities and could exit the line when I needed to. When I finally got up to the cast member I was asked so many invasive and honestly condescending questions about how I’m impacted by my “issues” and what problems could arise for me in line only to be denied with no explanation other than “the wheelchair is enough” which it was not. It really felt like being told “you’re not disabled enough”. I just want to know why. Was it my presentation? Was it my eye contact (that I make compulsively but the way)? Was it that I could advocate for myself? Was it really the fucking wheelchair? I just don’t understand. When I was done I was so overwhelmed and on the verge of tears only to be told no.

At California adventure all of the rides are “wheelchair accessible” and some rides in regular Disney are too (even though some of those ramps are steep as fuck), so I could wait in line for those in the chair but because of my sensory issues I couldn’t so honestly I feel like I missed out on a lot.

Thankfully we were able to get return times at some rides in Disney (but not California adventure) because I was using a wheelchair. But that was a whole other issue. You’d have to go through the exit and some of the hallways were so fucking narrow that two chairs couldn’t fucking pass each other. And ramps were so god damn steep. Like yeah the ground was pretty flat and not steep outside the rides big fuck guys trying to get to so many of the rides was impossible without a friend to like run push me up a hill. Space mountain, a ride I got a return time for, was like this. My friends tried to get the return time while I waited at the bottom but the cast member said I had to come up to get it even though I was somewhere they could definitely see me and from where I could wave/whatever to prove I was with them. But no I had to get up the inaccessible hill instead.

I still had a good time and am so grateful to my friends, one of whom basically gave me a tour of all the architecture and history of the park and Disney which was super cool. I also really enjoyed the rides themselves. And every cast member I interacted with was nice about everything (accessibility services person was nice but it felt condescending).

The one big thing I did like about the park though was the shape and size of the seats on the rides. I could actually fit on them mostly comfortably. Which for me is rare. I’m a plus size person (especially in the thighs and stomach) so I typically have a hard time fitting on rides other places so that was a nice change.

I think imma stick to six flags and universal studios in the future since I can actually be accommodated there. Sure six flags is not the best in terms for mobility issue accessibility since it is rather steep in many parts but I personally can cope with that better and they have elevators.

You may wonder, why do some disabled people not shower often? Well, you see, showers are actually quite intense trials designed to kill us. The steam? Makes the blood in our bodies go wild, fucks up our balance and tries to make us pass out. You have to be standing or sitting. Standing is hell and sitting is a peculiar purgatory. Reaching for bottles and soap and shit requires moving The Body, which is in constant pain that will only get worse the more we move and so will the fog that envelopes our brains and impairs our thinking.

Don't even get me started on drying off. "Why don't some of you shower often" I don't know, why don't you run marathons regularly? Because it sucks and you can't, that's why.

Does anyone else get painful pockets of blood on their bodies? For me they’re in my inner thighs and hurt like shit.