Delicatedarknight - Brrtrouper - Tumblr Blog

Lois: Clark..why are you wearing a sweater?

Clark: it's a bit chilly today, don't you think?

Lois: [quietly] But it's the middle of June

Perry: uhh…nice fashion you got there, Kent

Clark: [awkwardly] thanks

Sometime later..

Clark: this won't work for long

Bruce: [chuckling sheepishly] Why, what happened?

Clark: why you ask?

[lifts his sweater to show the huge iron press mark]

Clark: you know, people looked at me like I was a lunatic

Bruce: [dying of laughter] I would make sure to do better next time

Clark: by better, you mean not burning it and not you being creative while burning it, right?

Bruce: [feigning innocence] oh my, definitely dear

Clark: that doesn't sound too reassuring..

Hal Jordan: so spooky, are you a little spoon or big spoon?

Bruce: I'm a menace, a threat, a shadow vigilante who would beat you up so discreetly that they won't even know it's me. What makes you think I will care about cutlery?

Clark: he is the little spoon

Bruce: Clark..how can you do this to me?

Clark: Bruce.. I'm sorry but I have to do it...

Bruce: so at the end you only wanted me for money...I trusted you Clark..

Clark: but Bruce that's the rules of monopoly

Bruce: Ma Kent NEVER RAISED YOU LIKE THAT

Jason: and they call me the drama queen

Tim: did you forgot the time you tried to sell your body because you couldn't pay rent

Dick: says the one who begged not to be put in jail because he has 3 children to take care of

Damian: remember the time when you were asked to pay rent, and you simply said, “baby, I'm not even here, I'm a hallucination”

Jason: at least I didn’t try to sell Superboy off just because I didn't have money

Alfred:[slowly putting the board away] Very well, sir, I believe we've reached a satisfactory conclusion for today

Imagine JL about to celebrate Halloween, where no one knows each other's identity. Superman thinking to dress as Jack from Titanic just for kicks and thought it would be funny if Batman dressed up as Rose

Superman: Batman, would you like to be Rose to my Jack? *Winking aggressively with a rose in mouth*

Batman: *too busy arranging documents* Why? Do you wanna die like him?

Superman: *almost tearing up* n-no..I wanted to be love of your life

Batman: *dramatically turning* oh oh..

Rest of the JL looking at them with stoic face

Aquaman: Do they always have to do it?

Green Lantern: We get it you guys are dating!!! No need to make us feel more lonely!

Some time later...

Flash: Green Lantern are you dressing up as trash?

Green Lantern: excuse moi? Why the actual fck would I?

Flash: cause I wanna take you out *lip bites*

Green Lantern: you should stop spending time with supes

Flash: soo...can I take you out?

Green Lantern: trash talk again and I will throw you out for sure *walking away*

Green Lantern stopping mid way and glances at flash : and it's a yes, you can take me out

Rest JL looking at superbat and then green lantern with flash

Wonder woman: at this point I'm just dressing up as wonder woman

Arthur: I was thinking of dressing up as a clown, but since we already have four. I might just dress up as chucky 🔪

Okk imagine for some reason or other Damian suggested Bruce and him take the subway for the parents meet for a change of pace and while they are waiting there they are met with Clark along with Jon in his arms who was blowing bubbles and on their way to new gotham museum. Clark and Bruce exchanged pleasantries and waited in silence until Jon spoke " Damian do u also wanna blow some bubbles?" with a gleaming smile. Damian, feeling flustered for being caught having interest in 'childish things', looked away and shook his head in denial. Bruce sighed and before he could say anything Clark has already picked Damian up in another arm and spoke "It's okay to let yourself relish things for a change of pace" as he softly smiled while Jon taught Damian how to blow bubbles. Jon told Damian to simply blow in the bubble wand and Damian being novice to it blew too hard into it, leading to soap solution being splattered. Clark cooed at the scene and tried to stifle a laugh just like Bruce whose eyes were shining in endearment. Damian poutes at the failed attempt, again Jon told him to blow slowly into the wand and demonstrated how to do it. Determined to blow his first bubble perfectly he took a deep breath and blew into the bubble wand slowly and steadily. And there it is world's most perfect bubble floating around, happy at his achievement he pointed at bubble while looking at Bruce and goes “ Did you see that? Did you see that dad? I did it!! ”. Bruce trying hard not to cry, proudly nods at his son's achievement and happiness. He doesn't know why but something about the scene warmed Bruce, that even he ended up genuinely smiling at them. He looked at how love of his life which Bruce would never admit to look like while hyping the boys for a bubble competition. Flash . All three looked at Bruce with a look of confusion when Clark squinted his eyes accusingly "you took a photo of us, didn't you?". Bruce looked away while mumbling a small 'no' a habit of his when caught lying as he silently kept his phone away. Jon chimed in gleefully with a "Show us, show us" along with the other two joining him. And there it was a photo of everyone's faces squished together trying to take a peek of the photo on the front page of every newspaper known to man with headlines 'Bruce wayne's secret lover? ' with a tiny sub heading 'Did the Gotham vigilante finally bite the dust? '

A version with the black pools of nothingness eyes I usually draw; since irises were creeping people out 👁️

🎶👉 https://open.spotify.com/track/003vvx7Niy0yvhvHt4a68B

Who is the best animated Batman? Can the Supermen convince you that it's theirs? (Alt: Who is the most whipped animated Superman?)

Give me fic where Bruce realised that he misses the little pre JL greet up back pats or the momentarily blissful hugs from superman after life and death fights. But everytime superman does that he would always be met by fake disapproving bat grunting. Add to the mix Lois and Diana dating and Lois shares Clark rambling about how batman hates him. And to spice things up hal Jordan who no one knows how overhears the convo and goes like it would be funny if supes stops being handsy with spooky and him actually missing it. There was moment of silence before Diana and Lois looked at eachother with wide eyes and then at Hal and all hell broke loose. Starting the mission "make spooky ask his supes for hugs".

Imagine Alfred goes on an extended vacation to England and Clark notices that after a week of him being gone, Bruce is wearing new clothing everyday. So he asks about it and Bruce just shrugs and says 'I don't know how to do laundry' and Clark is aghast because how can Bruce know how to run a company but not know how to do his own laundry. So Clark endeavours to teach him but after three attempts resulting in pink tinged shirts, Clark gives up and says he'll do it for Bruce until Alfred gets back.

After a few weeks, Alfred returns and he and Clark catch up over tea as Bruce gets ready for work upstairs. Clark mentions the laundry situation to him, something along the lines of 'you've taught Bruce how to cook, how come you never taught him how to do his own laundry?' And Alfred says, 'oh I have. Master Bruce simply detests doing laundry.' And Clark gets a confused little frown on his face and says 'but Bruce said...' and Alfred looks up from his cup of tea, a small smile on his lips, and says, 'Mr. Kent, I thought you of all people would be able to tell when Master Bruce was lying.' And Clark just snaps his mouth shut and realises he's been played like a damn fiddle.

Meanwhile, Bruce puts on one of the shirts Clark washed for him; wearing a small smile of his own.

How is there not a superbat fic on ao3 where Bruce and Clark meet as Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent and realize they're soulmates (maybe something happens when they touch for the first time) and they both panic about having a civilian soul mate who, actually, they are unfortunately very much in love with because yes, they actually are kinda perfect for each other...

And then on the flip side, Batman and Superman are working together every now and then and once they get to be better friends they each find out the other has a civilian soulmate too and discuss what the best way to handle that is since there's not really a precedent for it?(at least it seems like only they seem to have that specific problem.)

And of course they can't use names, because that would give away their secret identities to each other, but Bruce says things like "My soulmate is just so... unendingly optimistic and nice. It's hard to feel like anything could be hopeless around them. You'd like them, Kal."

And Superman says things like "I think you'd hate my soulmate, B. They're kind of a show-off, a little too self-confident, but they have a really good heart underneath it all. They're definitely way out of my league, if you don't count me being Superman, but they always make me feel like I'm the special one of the two of us, and they doesn't even know I'm anything more than just some guy."

It takes them an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, and maybe it's not even because they figure it out, maybe it's just when one of them finally gets the courage to reveal their secret identity to the other?

It might also be funny if Bruce is trying to give Clark a hickey and can't, and that starts the suspicion that maybe Clark isn't all he seems 🤣

Batman figures it out, decides there's literally no risk now in revealing that he's Batman to Clark; and Clark is like "holy shit" and immediately confesses that he's Superman and Bruce is just all smug like "I know, I figured it out this morning"

That, or Clark sees Bruce with a broken rib or something because of his x-ray vision and gets all worried about it, so he tries to figure out how his soulmate got hurt. In the process, he finds the batcave and realizes that Bruce is Batman and immediately goes to find him and clear everything up and also make him get some medical attention because no way is his soulmate going back out on patrol with broken ribs 😡

Anyways I haven't been able to find a fic like this??? If it exists I'd love to be linked to it, if not I may just write it myself haha

Superbat (Clark Kent / Bruce Wayne)

I will add more in a near future

Please, give me suggestions for this blog and submit your own fics

These are listed by size - wordcount

Keep reading

“Do you think those two are making out?” Lois asked as she and Selina went to sit down.

“Is your friend willing to take the first step?” Selina asked, not-so-carelessly stepping on the foot of one of the guests. She didn't feel guilty. The guy was about to put his hands on her and Lois's bottom. Selina had just reminded him of his place.

The other woman snorted, “Why would Clark make the first move? Mr. Wayne seems to know what he wants."

“A boy wants to be wooed,” Selina retorted.

Lois gave a delightful giggle, “Is the rich boy old fashioned? I would never have said it."

“You wouldn't say many things about him.”

“Yeah, in fact I had no idea that he was interested in men…”

Selina shrugged, “He had a very strict upbringing and only recently came out as bisexual.”

Alfred seemed like a good guy to her, but certainly not the best one to ask questions about why guys were hot too. Though she had to give him more credit considering how much he had to put up with Bruce.

Lois accepted the explanation. She then asked, “And what does he think of Superman?”

“Superman?”

“You in Gotham have Batman, we have Superman.”

Selina smiled, “I know, I'm surprised you ask about Superman.”

“Oh, you know…curiosity. Now it seems like everyone has to have an opinion on something.”

Nice save there. Lois Lane lived up to her reputation. But Selina certainly couldn't tell her oh Bruce is a first rate paranoid and is convinced that Superman is secretly evil or something.

There it was necessary to maintain a certain image.

“He enjoyed flying with Superman Airlines, and he would probably repeat the experience at the first opportunity.”

“Because of the arms,” Lois said.

“Because of the arms,” Seliana agreed. “He couldn't stop singing them to me. They were so toned Selina. They could have broken me in two and I would have thanked him.”

“Very interesting,” the reporter said, a mischievous glint in her eyes. Who knows what her brilliant head was working up at that moment.

Selina didn't investigate. What she had to do was direct Lois towards the conclusion she wanted.

They finally took their seats. The chairs next to them were still empty. She smiled.

Read more Mission: seducing Superman

Bruce Wayne has never met a dick he couldn’t deepthroat. Clark Kent has an alien dick he’s hidden after years of disastrous attempts at intimacy. Together, they’ll answer the age-old question: is it gay if it’s for the pursuit of scientific data?

AKA, I keep writing fic summaries without actually writing the fic

No, but sports AU? Bruce as the new captain of the 'Gotham Knights⚔️' who hadn't won anything in ten years. Clark as the rising star of the 'Metropolis FC🌇' making the team rely on him so much they don't even prepare for the match cos, well, it's Gotham, lol.

Then the match comes and Gotham fucking cleans the floor with them, cos Bruce has studied his enemy like the freak he is, and they had no fucking chance.

Clark gets angry and frustrated with his own team. He finds Bruce in the backstage, they start arguing, it develops into shouting, and suddenly they are making out hard, and dirty, and violently. Clark is instantly ashamed, questioning his sexuality and life, but it's okay, because it was just one (1) mistake, and he is not going to see the asshole again.

Then the next season comes by and he gets sold to the Gotham Knights (who had won the league and suddenly has $) as their new star, and things get complicated.

Batman Fic Recs Feat. Identity Reveal

ALL of the fics are complete or oneshots. Mostly gen, but there will be a few with ships. I’ll mention in description if there are any ships :)

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He Knows by Ortholeine

“Timothy Drake is a civilian, a normal boy. Kind of. He's normal in that he keeps secrets and has some hobbies. Those secrets and hobbies, though, are a little unique...and completely, 100% revolve around the crime-fighting family of Gotham.

A good friend of the Waynes, Tim finds himself dodging his heroes' attempts to reveal their identities to him in a misguided attempt to keep the status quo. No one seems to want to let it rest, unfortunately for Timothy Drake.”

Funny, silly, goofy…. Exactly what I want to see in identity reveal fics.

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The Waynes, Damsels in Distress by hitthedeck

“Roses are red, violets are blue, Bruce Wayne and his kids get kidnapped every other week. Some things are just universal, undeniable facts of life.

Or, in which Bruce Wayne is still Batman and his kids are still Robins, but they keep letting themselves get kidnapped because they think it's funny.”

this one is on the list because it’s HILARIOUS. I love it so much.

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Plagiarism is Not a Joke, Batman by popsunner

“‘How old are you?’

Bruce very much would like to have the last two minutes back please, turns out, he does not want to trust them with his identity.

‘Twenty-three,’ He growls.”

I love rereading this one…. VERY funny

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Pretty Boys and Identity Problems by DarnGoshit

“In an effort to get over his crush on Robin, Kon pursues a relationship with a civilian Gothamite, Tim Drake.

Or, Tim accidentally Hannah Montana’s his crush... and it works?”

Tim Drake/Kon-El

Ah, secret identity shenanigans…

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Captain Marvel’s Adopted? by Len_suilon_mellon

“When Captain Marvel sends out a distress call, the only League member available is Batman. Bruce comes to his aid, but he finds out that Billy is a 10-year-old homeless orphan with black hair and blue eyes. Obviously, he makes the only logical decision and adopts Billy. Because it's Bruce—who's allergic to revealing life-changing information—the League is left in the dark.”

5+1 fic where the JL discovers Billy’s ID, really cute

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Every Fiber of My Being by navpike

“As much as Dick and his siblings have argued, Bruce has never budged on his "Keeping Secrets Policy". There's not a person alive outside of the family that knows the secret identity of any of the Bats. Not even Dick's boyfriend.
Dick understands the need for some secrets, knows that keeping their identities safe keeps them and their loved ones safe, but when he takes up the cowl, team dynamics aren't the only things that begin to change.”

Dick Grayson/Wally West

In which the whole secret identity thing causes many problems. It’s SO GOOD, I promise

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miss me? by envysparkler

“Jason’s plan to observe his family’s reactions to his resurrection…does not go as intended.”

kind of an identity reveal fic? It’s more the “Jason’s alive” reveal, but I’m going to count it anyway

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knockoff bat by impravidus

“5 times people noticed batman was acting differently + the 1 time someone found out why (+ the time someone finds the real batman)”

Dick Grayson/Wally West and Bruce Wayne/Clark Kent.

There’s a bit of hurt/comfort, but it’s really really good

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Rumor Has It by rotasha

“A rumor gets out about Bruce Wayne and he ends up coming out to the Justice League. This is news to Clark, who has been pining over Bruce for years.”

Bruce Wayne/Clark Kent

okay. So. I have MANY thoughts about including this here, and I could write a lot about how a super hero’s secret identity inherently has many queer themes, but I won’t get into that. I think it counts as a kind of identity reveal, so here we are.

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letter of complaint by envysparkler

“Batman finds himself captured by the new crime lord in Gotham, who has a bone to pick with him.”

one of MANY of my favorite fics where Jason comes back and reveals himself as the Red Hood

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hand in unlovable hand by batmans_cheerleader and leviathans_watching

“A sound caught his attention, and instantly Jason was poised to throw himself at whoever came through the door. Tense, he waited, but when the door creaked open to reveal not one person, but a whole team, he hesitated.

They were carrying someone none too gently along with them, and Jason could only watch, frozen, as they completely ignored him, dumping the person into the cell, not even wincing at the sick sound their head made when it hit the ground.

Jason barely had time to take in that all-too-familiar cowl before the door slammed shut, and he was alone. With Bruce fucking Wayne.

Nausea swirled in his throat and he forced it down. Puking in his helmet was not fun. And yeah, he knew that from experience. What kind of sick abuse was this? Or was it just an awful, awful coincidence?”

yeah. Just. Jason being forced to eventually reveal himself to Bruce when they’re captured together… I ate that shit up

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From the Shadows by Wolfsbanesparks

“All Billy Batson wanted was to survive a particularly rough week living on the streets of Fawcett City. The last thing he was looking for was a new family.

All Bruce Wayne wanted was to ask learn a bit more about his upbeat teammate under the guise of official Wayne Enterprises business. But he could never turn his back on a child in need. Especially one as surrounded by mystery as Billy.”

Featuring identity reveals from both Bruce and Billy. There’s a lot more to the fic than the reveals, but there’s a LOT of suspense leading up to them.

I know I’ve written before about ideas for angsty “Bruce is Clark’s fixer” stories before, but also the cracky possibilities are endless.

Clark keeps shattering glasses at restaurants and picking up things he absolutely shouldn’t be able, and it’s only through the power of 17+ generations of Wayne breeding for charisma, Bruce’s flawless ability to lie about literally anything on the fly, and the fact that both of them are ridiculously attractive that keeps anyone from truly thinking any of those “accidents” through.

“My friend gets unlucky around glassware,” Bruce says, smiling, “You understand, of course.”

Confused waiter staring at 17 shattered water glasses while Clark hides his head in his hands: “Um….yeah, whatever man.”

Okay, but Bruce suddenly getting cursed or something, and suddenly is able to read people's minds.

And among the drama, he turns to Clark and suddenly is hit with "Oh dear, he looks so hot today, I wanna kiss him so bad. Love his tight ass in those fitting pants❤️". And Bruce is like "WTF?!!!" But now he can't confess he is cursed and can read minds, cos Clark will find out he knows, he will be embarrassed, and their relationship will go to shit.

So Bruce tries to find the solution by himself, and of course Clark forces himself into the investigation because "that's what friends do, Bruce" but his mind keeps getting more and more horny and explicit about the things he wants do to him, and Bruce is suddenly hard and he can't fucking keep going like this and keep a straight face as Clark wrecks him in his mind.

Clark: “Please. You can barely tell I’m from Kansas, stop with the Midwestern stereotypes already.”

Bruce: “Look me dead in the eyes right now and tell me you don’t have corn kernels in your left pocket.”

Clark:

Bruce: “That’s what I thought.”

Clark:

Bruce:

Clark: “The squirrels in the park get mean if I don’t feed them, okay?”

*Krypto sniffing Bruce after he and Superman save him*

Clark: "Sorry about that Mr. Wayne. Kyrpto likes to sniff every new person he meets :)."

*Krypto ignoring Batman the first time they meet*

Clark:

The thing is, Clark doesn’t even like coffee. Yet there sits a shitty drip coffee maker, glass carafe and everything, on his worn linoleum countertop. The office was throwing it out, as they had recently upgraded to some single-serve machine (pods full of damp coffee grounds soon filled the break room trash can, and Clark has to hold back a gag every time he passes it) and was giving away their old one.

Clark stares at the chipped black paint on the coffee maker from his bed. Gentle morning light filtered through his curtains in his studio apartment, and Clark turned to watch how the glow and shadows played along Bruce’s bare back. HIs hand starts reaching out of its own accord, determined to feel if the sunlight had warmed Bruce’s skin. But millimeters above a scarred, broad expanse, Clark stops and lets his hand hover.

Because him and Bruce? They don’t do that. There’s no loving caresses, no morning kisses with horrible breath. Each touch is purposeful, yanking off shirts and ripping down zippers. There’s slamming against walls and hungry hands, and, if Clark is really lucky, rough kisses and wine-stain marks left on his neck. Bruce is, if nothing else, an efficient man, so Clark knows why they do this. Bruce will come in after patrol, peppered with bruises, and push Clark against the wall. Or Clark will hover over the entrance to the Batcave after flying halfway across the world for a tsunami, screaming of those he could not save ringing through his head, until Bruce will let him in. They aren't gentle, and they aren’t romantic, and Clark has almost gotten used to having this. Tantalus finally gripping onto the fruit to take a bite, and having it yanked away after the first taste.

Because he wants it all. He wants to cook for Bruce in the early hours of the morning after patrol. He wants to wrap gently around him in bed, for no reason other than he wants to be close, and he wants forehead kisses. He wants to soothe Bruce from nightmares and have dinners with Bruce’s kids. He wants Bruce to look at him with a soft smile and gentle eyes.

He wants to make Bruce coffee in the morning. 

And so the coffee maker sits in Clark’s kitchen, glass glinting as if to make sure Clark can’t ignore it. 

Clark sighs and lays back in the bed with a thump. He glances over to Bruce, sheets pushed around his torso and the rise and fall of his hips,  If this is all he gets, he will gorge himself on these small moments. Clark zeroes in on Bruce’s heart rate (something that is halfway to an obsession at this point. He’ll find himself reaching for the steady beating multiple times a day, just to check, he tells himself. Just to check.) and realizes the tempo has increased too much for Bruce to still be asleep.

Clark doesn’t rouse him with doting kisses on his neck, or wrapping his arms around his waist. He doesn’t thread his hand through Bruce’s foppish hair and he certainly doesn’t run his fingers lightly down his back.

So Clark waits. He glances around his room, something to distract him from gazing at Bruce with what he is sure is an entirely too honest face. His eyes catch on the glare of the coffee-machine in the kitchen once again and he feels his heart pick up its pace.

It was an impulse decision to bring it back to his apartment, fueled by some pipe dream that maybe he could be something for Bruce besides a stress-reliever. He regrets it immensely. Every time he saw it, it was a stark reminder of what he couldn’t have and hopes that would never be realized. He should just throw the damn thing away. Clark rubs his hands over his face and sighs heavily, then glaces over to Bruce. Soft grey eyes peer up at him.

“G-goodmorning,” Clark stammers, feeling caught.

“Goodmorning.” Bruce says, low and even. 

Neither of them move, and for a moment the two meet eyes. In moments like these, where Clark is not only looking, but he’s being seen, that he has hope. He feels it flutter in his chest now as he takes in Bruce’s pillow wrinkled face and sleep-laden expression. 

Clark wants to be brave in love. He wants to reach out and try and not be ashamed if he fails. He wants to stand on that precipice and see if he’s caught when he falls. And as Clark stares, he smiles gently, and swears he sees something reflected in Bruce’s eyes. Bruce breaks contact and looks away, and the moment should be gone. The ache in Clark’s chest should dissipate, and yet he can see a light flush in Bruce’s cheeks.

Maybe Clark can be brave. If Bruce doesn’t leave, if he stays in the bed for one more minute, Clark will ask him. 

So Clark waits, counting silently along with the beat of Bruce’s heart. He stares up at the ceiling, the glow of sunlight trapped in his curtains, down at his hands. He avoids and he waits.

Bruce shuffles to sit up in bed around the 45 second mark, and Clark’s heart drops. But Bruce simply props his pillow up and lounges, glancing over.

“Clark,” Bruce clears his throat. 50, 51. “Are you..alright?”

Desperate to not lose count, Clark holds up a finger. 58, 59, 60.

He finally turns and faces Bruce, only to see a softly furrowed brow and concerned eyes. 

“Yeah,” he says. “Yeah, I’m alright.”

His heart drops and Clark wants to be brave. He can feel each word lodged in his throat, ready to be spit out, and distantly he’s aware that he is simply about to ask if Bruce wants coffee, as any mid-westerner raised properly would. But he knows Bruce, despite the distance the vigilante tries to create. He knows what this invitation would mean to both of them.

You are the ledge I leap off of, and you are the ocean I fall into, he thinks.

“Bruce, would you like some coffee?”

Bruce schools his expression immediately and Clark feels the wind whipping his clothes as he falls.  Clark glances down at his hands curled in his lap, and he waits and he waits. He hears Bruce clear his throat once, twice.

“I would.”

Clark feels a grin lift his lips, unbidden, and he laughs a gentle huffing thing.

“Yeah?” He looks over at Bruce and sees a small smile playing at the corner of his mouth. “Let me, um, let me get that started then.”

He lifts the sheet and quickly walks over to the nearest pile of clothes (he may have superspeeded a bit) to grab a shirt. He throws it on and walks towards the kitchen, hearing a shout of, “It better not be that awful bottled shit you drink, Kent!”

Clarks laughs again, giddy, and yells back, “Shucks Bruce, I had just picked some up at the gas station for you!”

CLark moves around his kitchen, grabbing a mug and the bag of grounds he had picked up the day prior, before moving over to the coffee machine. His coffee experience is limited to glass bottles of cream and sugar with the barest hint of coffee in only the direst of circumstances (days of no sleep or after battles with kryptonite), so he tries to emulate the movements he’s seen at the office. He dutifully fills the carafe with water and pours it into the machine, then reaches over to grab one of the filters he had stolen from work. After successfully filling the filter with grounds, he reaches over to flip the switch and … nothing. He hears a teasing huff from behind him.

Bruce leans against the counter and Clark marvels at how quietly the man moves. Bruce forwent a shirt, standing only in boxers. Clark stares for a moment, taking in sharp hip bones, a stark v-line, and pale skin before realizing Bruce had spoken.

“I’m sorry?” Clark asks and tears his eyes away back to safety.

Bruce huffs once more.

“I said the machine wasn’t plugged in.”

Clark flushed and quickly went to plug it in, fumbling on the way there. He tried once more to push the button, and lo and behold, the machine started with a small whirr. Coffee collected and dripped into the glass carafe, the sound filling the silence left in the kitchen.

The light had shifted to something brighter, heartier as it fell through Clark’s windows. It hit the side of Bruce’s face and Clark let himself look unabashedly, for once. He felt almost hedonistic, basking in the presence of a sleep-warm Bruce and the morning light.

“So you’re a big coffee drinker, huh?” Bruce said, a smile playing at his lips.

“Rao, no.” Clark protests. “I just thought it might be nice for when I have, uh, guests over.”

Clark can see the ghost of a smirk and has never felt more transparent. He takes the leap.

“You’ve never stayed.” 

“You’ve never asked.” Bruce replies and the two let that hang in the air.

“I wanted you to一 want you to.” Clark breaks the silence with a sheepish smile. “I just never thought you’d want the morning-afters.”

Bruce moves to grab a mug from the counter and starts to fill his cup up. He takes a sip, and Clark knows that the coffee is too damn hot just as he knows Bruce needs a second to process. And he’s more than happy to wait.

“I wasn’t sure of the parameters of … this. So I erred on the side of caution.”

Clark stares at him for a moment, trying to decipher what Bruce meant. Reading Bruce has become a skill (an artform) that he’s honed over years. He tries to rid himself of a hopeful bias as he discerns what Bruce meant, but it almost sounds like一

“I was happy to take what I could get too.” Clark says softly. He can feel every desire he has bubbling in his chest, fueled by hope. He wants to say it all, but he swallows down his words. He couldn’t break this fragile moment. Now was not the time. But there would be a right time, Clark knew now. 

They let the minute stretch quietly, both content. Bruce takes another sip of coffee and grimaces.

“Clark, this is terrible.”

Clark laughs, a bright, surprised thing and looks over at Bruce. Both men are smiling, carrying a lightness that Clark hadn’t seen before. 

You are the ledge I leap off of, and you are the ocean I fall into, but you are the hand I grip as we slip off the edge. Clark thinks.  

i kinda imagine superman subconsciously floating when he sleeps somewhere he's most comfortable and feel safe in. and one of those places is a guest room in wayne manor lol

I need more Bruce interacting with Jon and Conner. Bruce mother henning Conner despite the mf being a tank on two legs and pretty much indestructible.

Reminding him to eat, and sleep, and put a jacket on whenever he steps outside, even if Kon has no need for them. Who tends to his wounds after battle.

Long trips to the medical bay. Kon pretending to be sick, struck down by some Kryptonian illness, cause he learned from Clark Bruce makes a great chicken soup.

Bruce scolding him for pointlessly throwing himself at danger for the sake of showing off, "Benched. 2 weeks. No fussing."

" Yeah, whatever, mom."

Someone's waiting for Bruce to correct him. They'll be waiting a long time.

Bruce goes from " Mr. Damian's Dad" to " Bruce" to " Pa" with Jon; The transition is cleaner and smoother and faster than Bruce expected, but he's not complaining.

Give me Bruce who patches up Jon's uniform, who tells him it's perfectly fine to still have toys at his age (it's not about objects, but the familiarity they bring) and he takes them with on patrol. Just in case.

Bruce who picks him up from school, who tells off bullies for him with a tongue so mean Jon actually gulps, who picks him up when he pretends to sleep in the Batmboile.

Bruce who has their favorite snacks on his utility belt, who just slightly overprotective and tells Clark please, don't throw their kids into the oxygen layer because they dared you to.

"Our kids?"

" I don't mean to overstep. I apologize. I'll be more mindful of my language in the fu--" Clark is crying and hugging him and Bruce simply pats his back.

I think Bruce would start wearing his children’s merch and it would backfire horribly

He buys a whole shipment of shirts, mugs, bags, etc because he loves his kids and he’s so proud of them it hurts.

The day after it arrives, the manor dissolves into a cold war. Long held alliances snap in half, and tentative truces break down. Damian is staring hatefully at Dick. Jason’s glaring at Tim like he wants to recreate Titans Tower. Bruce has no idea what set them off.

After a week of this, Bruce is at his wit’s end. None of his kids will talk to him, so he goes to the bat computer for some well intentioned stalking. Except- what’s this? There’s an unnamed file, hidden in the depths of the computer. Bruce, having great respect for privacy and personal space, immediately starts to crack it. It’s- a spreadsheet.

The two categories are his children’s names and the type of merch (hat, pin, fridge magnet, etc). With a grim and dawning horror, Bruce realizes that his children are keeping track of how many times he wears/uses their merch and is using it as a favoritism competition. There’s a hot debate about if the yellow bat symbol should belong to batgirl or to black bat. Murder threats are sprinkled liberally in the annotations.

So Bruce comes up with a plan- he’ll create his own spreadsheet that cross-references with his calendar to ensure that he wears/uses everyone’s merch equally. No favoritism accusations if it’s a rotating schedule, right?

Bruce is too tired to change before flopping into bed one night, and comes downstairs wearing the same shirt. The breakfast table explodes.

Bruce gives up and goes back to wearing Superman merch.

AU where Clark lands on Earth as an adult and having to mask as a regular person. Sure, it sounds almost identical to canon, but.

For Clark, its fairly easy to blend in because he was raised by really good human parents with regular customs.

This Clark? When he went to an interview at the Daily Planet he tried to eat a pen. Shit, a whole computer! Lois asks him out for coffee and he's pissing sweat, " Coffee! My Favorite...Food?"

"...You country boys are weird."

When he interviews Bruce? Just spends 5 minutes gawking. " You're...Beautiful. May I court you? What's your favorite planet? I can bring you rocks."

Bruce just thinks he's autistic (just like him)