My Momma Didnt Raise A Bigot. A Bitch Sure, But No Bigots

My momma didn’t raise a bigot. A bitch sure, but no bigots

We think since humans figured out stuff like shoes, phones, and stop lights we’re actually something super special on our planet but we’re basically just anxiety riddled monkeys.

Worse, even. At least the monkeys figured out you don’t have to pay taxes if you just keep your mouth shut.

Ahh but consider this!

*smokebombs*

Nice try but I wasn’t born yesterday. Comic shops full of merch and collectibles are the perfect place for mimics to hide. Be careful everyone

Aliens would be scared to death of Earth cryptids

Like full blown panic attacks

Because you humans are the dominant species on your planet what the fuck do you mean there’s mystery creatures on your planet that even you can’t understand???

Like imagine explaining Bigfoot or Mothman to someone who was totally unaware of them.

Alien: that’s it, we’re done, we’re going to nuke the earth from orbit. This is not allowed

Humans: *starts making milk from things like almonds*

Alien: you need to be S T O P P E D

We have GOT to pick a better name for our galaxy than the Milky Way, if aliens ever come from the Andromeda Galaxy they're gonna think it's a horny thing