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So I was listening to Madds Buckley’s ‘Sunset on Summerville’ Album about MHA and couldn’t help but notice that a lot of the songs could fit Umbrella Academy characters. I wrote this in like five minutes so it may be a bit jumbled but I hope you enjoyed.

One/Luther to me is Scotch Tape and Cellophane. The first verse when taken at face value is frustrated with the stickiness of the tape, forcing the singer to suffer while unwrapping the gift. I thought of this like the struggle of Luther and Reginald. Everything Reginald did stuck to Luther and even though his intentions were clear, he wanted his kids to suffer and Luther to be hidden away from the world. The rest of the song is more silly and loving, which shows the character growth Luther went through. He started as a leader type but grew into a very silly and loving character and the transition is mirrored in the song.

Two/Diego would be Little Big Boy. I originally thought that this would fit Five but listening to the song more and more made me change my opinion. Diego has this need to be seen, a need to prove himself. This is shown in his conflict with Luther and his vigilantism. He’s so determined to show everyone that he is the best, due to the fact that he feels as though he is a small fish in the metaphorical pond. The metaphor for water also fits with him since his power in the comics is breathing underwater but that’s less relevant to the comparison. He always wants something out of his reach, something bigger than him, saving JFK, being Number One in the Umbrella Academy. His desperation to prove himself makes him seem like a child vying for the approval of his father even well into adulthood, hence the ‘Little Big Boy.”

Three/Allison is Ambrosia Wine; she can give pleasure or pain, she can rumor someone to shoot themselves, but also to fall in love with her. Her power is quite literally giving people temptations and making them give into them. She is also known by many names and epithets due to her acting career. You cannot deny her, she is quite literally an urge you cannot ignore. This comparison is pretty self explanatory but it’s cool to draw it anyway.

Four/Klaus is Hawk in The Night. This one is more of a broad commentary of how Reginald wanted him to be. Hargreaves wanted Klaus to be powerful, to be obedient. The song is sung from the perspective of someone telling Hawks about how they are happy how he lost himself in his training and childhood, likely his handler. While Klaus didn’t meet the expectations set for him, he lost himself in drugs. The phrase ‘we raised you right’ comes up many times and it shows the self righteousness felt by both Hargreaves and the Commission. Reginald wanted to train Klaus so that he had the potential to be Number One and in doing so caused Klaus to lose his childhood and to shove down himself, desperately clawing at the world that wronged him. Hargreaves wanted him to be empty and emotionless, obedient like One was, and in doing so raised him ‘right,’ with days in the Mausoleum and traumatizing him so much that he had to turn to drugs and not tell anyone he was struggling because both him and Reginald had so much pride.

Five would be Child of Ashes. The warped sound of the song highlights the fact that he’s so much that his mind is a bit twisted. He is a child of ashes and without a home, raised in the apocalypse where his only company was burned buildings and the memory of his dead siblings. The song can also be seen as the manipulatings of the Handler. Telling him that his family won’t care for him now that he’s killed so many, and that he would be better off staying with them. The last line ‘We can watch the world decay,’ only reinforces this. The Handler wants him to stay and watch as his family dies again, in the same inevitable way. He has nowhere to run, his only home for so long was the ashes of the world’s end. The song is only about a minute and a half long so there isn’t much to analyze but it’s sad in its brevity.

Six/Ben is Sunset On Summerville. The sun is brought up again and again, a metaphor for life, the sunset and night being its opposite death. Ben is waiting for Klaus to realize that life is worth living, waiting with him. He is in twilight, the area between life and death, and everyday he is being called to the beyond, but he won’t give up on Klaus. The moon, or death indeed casts a cold light, we see this in the other ghosts that Klaus interacts with, it is so easy to give in to the despair but Ben finds comfort in his brother, the moons frigidity ‘only lasts the night’ but Klaus is there, a warmth or a beacon, a light like the sun of life. This reminds Ben that waiting is worth it. Waiting for Klaus to get sober, to stop being scared of his own power. While Ben longs to live again, he accepts the fact that he can’t, but seeing his siblings live and grow is enough for him to evade the cold embrace of death totally.

Seven/Viktor is Reach. This is actually what got me thinking of this whole thing. He is jealous of his siblings, she wants the spotlight they have. He wants the powers, the acknowledgment from their father. He works so hard, becoming exceptional at the violin, but it is impossible to become exceptional in the eyes of Reginald. He is constantly asking himself what he is doing wrong and when it will be his turn to be in the spotlight. He writes his book to try and lash out and get that spotlight, but instead it makes everyone shun him. He wants his life to be easy, while reaching for something he thinks is out of his grasp. He is left behind, his siblings have training, missions, but he has isolation and his violin. He is bitter, and in Season 1 this is very apparent. He harbors so much anger and frustration that it overflows into all of his actions. Also, fun little factoid, during the line ‘Why can’t I excel at something…like you’ like you is repeated six times, six times for his six other siblings who have powers.

If I had talents in creating edits or art I would make videos of these characters to these songs but alas. Hope this makes sense!

Found this old fic concept in my notes, I doubt I'll ever get around to writing it or that I could do it justice if I did, but it still makes me laugh so I wrote it up as a little blurb. Perhaps it will make you laugh too.

Mega Popstar Dream and Hob, his extremely non-famous celebrity crush

So in this universe Dream is an extremely famous musician. He's like Taylor Swift level of famous, if you walk up to any random person on the street they would know who he is. Meanwhile Hob is an actor but really not very well known, he was in a few small projects and is in the core cast of one TV show that's well-regarded but not super popular.

It's Dream's FAVORITE TV SHOW and Hob is his FAVORITE ACTOR that he's ferally OBSESSED WITH. Everyone knows about this too, Dream is really obvious about it. In interviews people will ask him what he likes and he's like "this is my favorite TV show" "have you seen Hob Gadling in that show isn't he incredible", They'll ask him if he has a celebrity crush (as a joke) and he's like "YES HOB GADLING 😍" like it's become a meme in Dream's fandom how much he has a crush on this random actor.

They've never met though, probably Dream was afraid to -- 'never meet your heroes' and all -- and never let his team book any overlapping events. So he's never seen Hob in person, only watched his favorite TV show 65 times in a row and memorized every inch of his face. Like a stalker.

So then a Buzzfeed-esque YouTube channel is running a special edition of their usual challenge show, "People Meet Their Celebrity Crush", except this time it's "CELEBRITIES Meet Their Celebrity Crush." Dream's entire team conspires against him to book him on this. Dream doesn't know what it is until the very moment since the whole point is to surprise people with their crush. Needless to say, Hob was REALLY dubious when the channel reached out like "do you want to come on as Dream's celebrity crush" but what's he gonna do say NO? say NO when Dream is so pretty and cute? So yeah he goes.

Anyway during the moment in the video when they revealed his celebrity crush to him -- aka Hob just looking like a totally normal and random guy -- Dream literally tripped over a chair and fell on the floor and then fainted. Instant meme and it became the thumbnail of the video. When Dream woke up to find Hob crouched by him all concerned asking if he was okay he nearly had a panic attack, he was never more flustered and nervous in his whole life not even performing for crowds of millions.

Hob fell in love instantly. He doesn't even know much about Dream, he hasn't even listened to Dream's music other than what's just playing ubiquitously on the radio all the time but all it took was watching Dream fall over a chair and then look up at him with his huge starry eyes and he was like 'This one's mine forever idc. I gotta protect this nerd he won't survive in the wild.'

Anyway they did start dating after that and Dream never leaves the honeymoon phase for the rest of his whole life, he truly thinks Hob is the most handsome man and best actor in the entire world and will tell anyone so at any opportunity, he goes around saying things like "see if you believe really hard you too can marry your celebrity crush 🥰" with zero irony, he might have skipped the Grammys to go to the premiere of season 3 of Hob's show (Hob didn't ask him to do that) (Dream won the Grammy but had more fun staring at Hob's face for 2 hours than he would have had at the awards show). Meanwhile Hob never talks about Dream in public because Dream already has negative 500% privacy in his life, he's extremely protective of him, and he allegedly punched one of the paparazzi in the face when they tried to take stealth shots at their wedding which was supposed to be a private affair. ALLEGEDLY. No charges were filed.

Dream did post one photo of the wedding on insta for his adoring fandom in which he described Hob as his knight in shining armor and then denied any knowledge of any 'alleged' events when asked about it in the future. Because Hob was so much more private about their relationship than Dream, for a while Dream's fandom had been like HOB DOESN'T DESERVE DREAM but after the (alleged) story about Hob punching someone in the face came out they were all obsessed with him. So that solved that problem.

(Despite Hob's efforts a paparazzi photo did come out of them the morning after the wedding, Hob sitting on the terrace drinking coffee, Dream sitting on his lap wearing Hob's shirt and looking thoroughly ravished. Dream might have framed it.)

Then they lived happily ever after. Dream put Hob in every one of his music videos regardless of whether it made sense for the story. Hob got one of Dream's songs put in his favorite TV show which made Dream's whole entire year. The end :)

Confession:

I am seven years old and sitting in a room that smells of wood and guilt.

There is a wall next to me,

Someone is on the other side,

I hear him breathing.

“I don’t think I have anything to confess,” I say, voice small

There is grumbling from the other side.

“No one is without sin, you are not an exception. Confess”

I look at my hands,

I am ashamed.

I am a human, and this means that I have sinned.

It was branded on me from the moment I was born,

And now I must lay bare all the wrongdoings I have done since then.

I tell the Father of how I step on the ants I see in my room,

How I lied about eating a piece of chocolate,

That I don’t love my neighbor because she doesn’t play with me.

As I speak with the faceless man beside me,

I think of God.

Omnipotent God,

Who insists that I flay myself at his altar for his disciples to see,

As I bleed and cry from the enormity of the sins I have committed in my seven years.

When I am finished telling the priest about the bugs, sweets, and toys,

He tells me to pray.

To pray that I am forgiven and don’t go to hell for behaving like a child.

I sob and clasp my hands together,

My nails digging into my skin.

I try to pray but I forget the words.

Am I such a sinner that I cannot say the Lord's words?

The father scoffs before starting the prayer,

I join,

Praying for forgiveness,

So that a seven year old girl won’t rot in hell.

Every time a fic is written where a canonically scarred or insane character is suddenly cleared of all ailments, an angel loses its wings.

Something I’ll never forget is the that I was calmly scrolling and suddenly I get a pure unfiltered view of a STINGRAY GIVING BIRTH! I didn’t want to see that, full stingussy on display while birthing three times. The worst thing is…the recorder put the ray on its back, THEYRE SUPPOSED TO BE ON THEIR STOMACH WHILE GIVING BIRITH!

I finished dungeon meshi and I just need to doodle the sillies being silly to cope

Does anyone have any fic recs for Gotham where Ed snaps at the GCPD because of how they treated him??? I’ve been looking but can’t find one. Preferably one with Riddlebird but anything would be appreciated.

FOX Gotham:

A plot: Jim Gordon going 😐

B plot: Bruce Wayne going 🥺

C plot: a torrid love/hate affair between a disabled machivelian mob boss and an autistic serial killer with DID. Spanning decades and including genuine friendship between two evil misfits, caretaking, jealousy, betrayal, political plots, murder of love rivals, attempted murder of eachother, love confessions, bi panic, identity crises, grave robbing, death traps, drug fuelled erotic hallucinations, jailbreaks, vendettas, flashy outfits, high camp public displays of obsession, trust shattered and rebuilt, self sacrifice and mutually assured destruction.

D plot: Ian from shameless going 🤡

Cancel cringe culture is so funny to me, not because of furries or anything like that. Because of crocs. I remember the age when everyone gagged and groaned about them, but look at how my boys have grown. They’re fashionable, mainstream, showing that cringe is an every spinning wheel of nonsense. Be yourself, be crocs.