For My Fellow Psychotics Who Struggle With Thinking Someone Is In Their House, A Method Ive Found That

for my fellow psychotics who struggle with thinking someone is in their house, a method I’ve found that really works are these guys:

i put them on my front door and anytime it opens they ring. that way if i think someone has broken in or i see someone who isn’t there i can think back to if the bells have rung, and if they haven’t i can assure myself it’s not real. obviously it’s not fool proof, like if you are prone to auditory hallucinations, but it has really helped me calm down in time to avoid major psychotic breaks. it’s a real lifesaver

nonpsychotics encouraged to rb

*does a gay little experiment that challenges god*

god tries to kill me at every sidewalk corner, and yet i still walk the same route knowing he is foolish enough to think i am capable of dying

me, grabbing an intercom in ikea: attention all customers. the store will be closing in five minutes. if you are present in the store after closing you will be hunted for sport 

you ever go into a sale section and be like damn i understand why y’all on sale y’all ugly as hell

“you should smile more”

yeah, i’ll smile when you’re actually funny, try harder clown