it's my drama. appreciate my flaws & learn from my mistakes. it's okay to cry your heart out but don't forget that there's always a second chance. be strong but don't forget to be yourself. you can be wild and carefree but don't forget to be serious at times. oh remember to laugh too! life is amazing and unfair at the same time... deal with it even if it's not the reality that you wanted!
300 posts
Minsan Sinasabi Ko Na Lang Sa Sarili Ko Na Strong Akong Tao At Malalampasan Ko Ito. Kaya Lang Minsan
minsan sinasabi ko na lang sa sarili ko na strong akong tao at malalampasan ko ito. kaya lang minsan di na umeepekto eh. ganun ata talaga.
walang taong strong pag dating sa taong pinakakamahal mo lalo na kung siya ang mundo mo and he/she means everything to you.
More Posts from Iamkakasince1991
Another challenge in my life...
School. Fck idk what to do anymore! It feels like everything is going against my plan. I will not be able to apply for tge nursing program next week coz i didnt tool the TEAS test... and i am not taking a risk to take it now coz i know i am not prepared at all. FML! Another reason to make my parents sad and disappointed. I am a failure. A worthless human being. I hate my life and how i live my life. It has no meaning. No goal. No purpose. I hate myself! I wishtime will stop so i can think clearly and plan carefully what i should do next...
Day 39 of this battle: she fell and she got hurt.
so i've been avoiding this for awhile now. yes, i'm still thinking abt it all the time. I mean how can i forget this if all i think and worry about is her condition. unfortunately, i learned today that she slippes in the bathroom and got hurt. She was even telling me about it. But since i am a coward, i can't even ask her about it. All i said was, "Mag-iingat ka kasi". I'm not sure why i can't talk abt it. Idk why i dont even want to know how bad she was hurt. But one thing is for sure & that is i am really worried. Ninang K even told me that she's been offerig Umpe her help but ayaw ng Umpe. She told me that i should be the one doing it for Umpe. All i could do was to jod on the phone. I am so upset that i can't be there right now. I am blaming myself sa lahat ng pagkujulang ko sa Umpe. Ni hindi ko sya magawang alalayan or bantayan. Ni hindi ko mahawakan mga kamay niya, ung face nya. It breaks my heart na wal akong magawa for her. Mas masakit pa nung nakita ko ung pictures nila. Sobra ang pinayat nya. Sobra sobra. Ang sakit na hindi ko sya mayakap sa mga panahong ito. Hanggang phone calls lang kami lagi. Ni hindi ko nga alam kung natutuwa ba sya na at least nakakausap nya ako or galit na ba sya kasi until now di pa ako umuuwi. Ano na ba dapat kong gawin? Nauubusan ako ng chances to be with her. Pinapalampas ko lang ung chances na pwede ko sana i-spend with her. Kung pwede lang ihihinto ko muna angnoras eh... Umpe, pakatatag ka! Palakasin mo loob mo tsaka ung health mo. Antayin mo ako ha. Mahal na mahal kita.
Day18 of this battle: talking abt it only breaks my heart.
I started talking abt what i feel abt the situation right now and still, it breaks my heart. I try not to let any tears fall coz i dont want them to see how bad & weak i am feeling right now. I am still in the state of shock and just as what my kuya said earlier... my emotions are still high. It's true. I am still in the verge of tears whenever i am alone, i am thinking, or whenever i am not doing anything. And as much as i want to focus on what is happening at tge moment, i can't help but missed out something. It feels like i am not myself. It's crazy coz my attention just shuts off and i keep zoning out. And before i went to bed, i learned that Umpe is nanghihina daw. Nagsuka sya. Ang sakit malaman na wala akong magawa for her. Tawa ako ng tawa kanina, smile ng smile, salita ng salita nung nasa school and after school. Pero ang Umpe ko masama na pala ang lasa. Ang sakit kasi hindi ko alam kung anu na tlga ang nangyayari. Everytime na i try to get on track, some unwanted stuff comes up. All i am asking lang naman is for Umpe to get better and be healthy again. I know i am asking for too much. But i swear, she doesnt deserve this illness. She deserves to live longer and happier. Please God, wag nio pa hayaang manghina ang Umpe. Tulungan nio po sya. Make her stronger and healthier. Please be with her. Please send the Holy Spirit and some angels next to her para po hindi sya mahirapan. Please make her better. Please dear God. Umpe, be strong! I love you and I will continue praying for you. Kukulitin ko si God na pagalingin ka nya. I love you Umpe ko, always and forever.
Day 28 of this battle: My letter for Umpe tonight, i wrote a short letter for Umpe. i tried putting humor coz i don't want her tocry while reading it. i tried to put everything i wanted to tell her but also tried not to make her worried and lonely. i hope through this short letter, i can make her happy and ease her pain. i hope my message for her will make her feel how much i wanted to be with her right now... I love you, Umpe! Always and forever. I miss you a lot too. I hope you'll feel better asap and you'll win over this battle...