Tim : You Dumbass!

Tim : You Dumbass!

Dick : I didn’t t screw up that much!

Tim : The GCPD is hunting you down, you did screw up that much.

Tim : We’re dead, and if we don’t die here, Bruce and Alfred are going to kill us.

I want more Brucie Wayne Content. I can’t get enough of the man embarrassing the shit out of himself. It’s addicting.

But I also want to see Brucie breaking character when he’s in a room with a reporter.

I want to see Bruce literally dumping himself on a love seat and Jason just passes him an unlit cigarette (ehem), which Tim (yes, Tim) lights up with his random ass lighter. Then I want to read the reporter slowly losing their goddamn minds. Because,

“This can’t be Brucie Wayne! He’s the Prince of Gotham!”

“Aren’t they suppose to be the happy, pleasant family that donates money that seems to never end?”

To which I want Bruce to respond with,

“I am the Prince of Gotham. But remember, Joker is the Clown Prince of crime in Gotham. If he’s Crime, then I have to be the Prince of something too, don’t I?”

Then his kids all surrounding him are just snickering to each other.

Jason : Murder wasn’t on today’s agenda.

Dick : It’s not on anyone’s.

Damian : No, it’s on mine, just not until next Thursday.

Dick : *Shrugs* :\

—————————

Tim : I want 17 shots of espresso in my coffee, please. Thanks.

Dick : *Horrified* Nope, that’s where I draw the line.

*In an Alternate Universe Where Pru and Tim met differently*

Tim : You’re an Assassin!?

Pru : We’ve known each other for literally two days. Why are you so shocked?

Tim : I just thought I’d get a normal friend for once..

Pru : What do you mean ‘for once’?

Jason, pointing at Tim : Bruce, look me in the eyes and tell me that kid is okay.

*Tim, mixing in Monster and Red Bull with his coffee that has way more espresso shots than legally allowed*

Bruce : …He looks fin—

Jason : NO, HE FUCKING ISN’T. ARE YOU BLIND??

Damian : *murmurs* Fuck

Dick : WHAT DID YOU SAY!?

Damian : I SAID FUCK