Gcpd - Tumblr Posts

The way the police figure out which of Batman's criminals to send to Arkham is a Buzzfeed quiz.

How important is your theme to you?

Theme? What losers have a theme

Babes, my entire lair is on theme, my henchmen are in theme, my daily clothes are on theme

My name and costume are good for me

I am my theme.

What do you think about Batman?

He is a thorn in my side, I want him dead

We're totally dating and share custody of the Robins, he just doesn't know it yet

I get why he does what he does and I respect him but he's annoying

We are the same yet opposite, we are light and dark, intrinsic to nature

All of the criminals take it as seriously as me taking an "Am I gay?" quiz in middle school

I don't think violence should be your first, second, or third response to anything. You should try to come to understandings and should always strive towards peace. In fact, I vie-

Person: There's a Batgirl and Batman shipper!

Me: *cocks Glock* Where?

When Batman is a good little cryptid and solves a murder, he gets a pat on the head and a cookie from Commissioner Gordon 😌

New Gotham SWAT Commander Danny

After the Joker once again took the Gotham Gala hostage, the people in the Gala were surprised, as for once the police were able to do anything about it. As the SWAT came in and shot Joker and his goons down.

And saved the Hostage? Bruce Wayne's daughter Cassandra. Not normal.

All were confused; normally, the cops just wait for Batman or fail.

It turns out Gotham had a new SWAT commander who took the shots on the Joker.

+

Danny was pissed but happy too; he just worked here because his mother's brother, Uncle James, works here too.

Then Dad sent him here to learn about police work and see different kinds of things, not just Amity Park. Just defusing Bombs seem to get boring for Danny.

And the first thing he did at his job was kill a clown gang?

Well worth it.

I have no idea why people look so surprised; it's just a clown with a gun, not Superman.

A gun does the job.

And Cass was here too, the last time he saw her was as she teached Ellie ballet.

As Danny was new, he had no real idea about the crime world of Gotham.

When the Gordons visit, they don't talk about Gotham, and the people in Amity Park never cared about the outside world.

They have their Fenton shield as a defense against alien invasions or similar.

Danny meet the cute Cass as she teached Ellie Ballet, who was the Joker took hostage.

Danny shooting Joker had nothing to do with Cass. He saw it later it was Cass after they were done.

Danny was professional and not lead by emotion. A new clean cop in Gotham.

Tim : You Dumbass!

Dick : I didn’t t screw up that much!

Tim : The GCPD is hunting you down, you did screw up that much.

Tim : We’re dead, and if we don’t die here, Bruce and Alfred are going to kill us.

The Intern (Day one)

Working for the Gotham department of environmental protection is not for the weak of heart. Follow along for a day in the life of Gotham’s newest environmental intern.

What did he say in the interview? “We typically don’t take interns.” With each slippery stride through god knows what, I think I understand why. Who’s takes the intern on a tour of the sewer on their first day?

I don’t complain though; Dr. Harrison is not kind to complainers. If you can ignore the horrendous smell and the suits ability to become a sauna within a couple steps, it is really just like any other job. My boss calls over his shoulder.

“You brought that pepper spray right?”

I pause for a moment to adjust my suit.

“Yes sir.”

Why would they create a hazardous waste suit with such narrow eye holes? Fumbling with my mask, I stumble straight into a surprisingly solid member of my group.

“I’m sorry…” I apologize backing away.

Pulling my arms out of the external sleeves, I manage to wipe out the fogged up interior goggles. Once my field of vision clears, my heart drops.

The scales draw my attention first. In the dark, they shimmer and shine against the waste water. I’ve never seen anything like it. The hulking figure peers down at me with eyes that glow yellow in the dark.

When I was a kid, I used to love Animal planet. It didn’t matter how cruel the animal kingdom was; I was enthralled learning about it. Crocodiles have the strongest jaws in the animal kingdom. They can cut through bone… easily.

Trying to ignore the vivid image of a crocodile crushing a pigs skull on network television, I smile awkwardly underneath all my layers. He has a skin condition; this is a human man.

“I didn’t see you there. Thank you for steadying me.”

The prehistoric looking man regards me with curiosity. He is human…A human with razor sharp claws that have allegedly skewered other humans for dinner…Nobody’s perfect?

Before I can contemplate what my skull would sound like getting snapped in half, Dr. Harrison interrupts the silence.

“Waylon, meet our newest intern. You two will be running into each other quite a bit this summer.”

Hesitantly, I reach out my trembling hand.

“It’s nice to meet you Mr. Jones. I hope to see you around.”

The reptilian eyes regard me with suspicion. In a swift motion, Killer Croc’s scaled hand envelops mine in a slightly painful shake.

“The last one said the same thing before I had to pick them out of my teeth.”

Oh god. A loud burst of nervous laughter explodes from my chest.

“I’m afraid that won’t be necessary. I carry floss on me.”

Both men flash incredulous glances my way.

This is going to be a long summer.

Part 2

The Intern: The Laughing Fish

Gotham harbor buzzes with energy this morning. Fishermen compete for the best catch. Dozens of workers prep the yachts for their bosses rich escapades. Even the seagulls are hard at work today, eagerly searching the docks for their next meal. A perfect image of regular people living their lives. Unfortunately if we've been called, then something must be going horribly wrong. Judging from the crowd of distressed fishermen forming towards the end of the boardwalk, my gut feeling was right.

As I draw near the distressed crowd, a familiar voice rises above the rest.

"We are sending our best people to look into this. Keep an eye out for a press conference by the end of today." Detective Gordon addresses the crowd.

The crowd erupts in a chorus of anger.

"You've got to be kidding me."

"I'm going to brutalize that clown!"

"God, I hate this city."

Behind the greying Detective stands a very sour looking Dr. Harris. I maneuver my way through the crowd next to him.

"Dr." I greet from behind.

Dr. Harris says nothing while attempting to catch a slippery fish.

"How adept are you at evolutionary biology?" He eventually asks through the sweat beating down his face.

"I dabble..." I respond growing closer to peer over his shoulder.

Dr. Harris grabs a fish with his bare hands. Before I can move the wiggling vertebrate leaps from his hands directly at my face.

"Catch it!" Dr. Harris hisses.

The flying tang leaves a wet trail across my cheek before dropping into my hands. The poor fish fights with everything it has to get away. Against all odds, I manage to wrangle the wiggle worm into a somewhat sturdy position in my palms.

Once the fish slows a bit, I notice something. The fish is smiling. A big yellow toothy smile with a red outline that one could mistake for lips. The external scales have turned a peculiar, yet familiar shade of pearly white. Both the pelvic fin and the pectoral fin have developed into a contrasting shade of dark green.

If I didn't know any better, I would say it looked like-

"Joker..." A voice growls interrupting my thoughts.

Turning to face our new arrival, I almost laugh at what I see. Batman's suit looks a little goofy in the morning light. Maybe even a little warm in the humid air. The cowl has a slight shine to it. Dr. Harris immediately begins explaining our situation to the Caped Crusader.

"This batch came in last night. We don't know how or why. The working hypothesis is that this may be a side effect of the Jokers latest toxin."

"Is it deadly?" Batman questions eyeing the gasping fish in my hands.

"Not to the fish. We should get the test results back by noon if we start soon."

Batman nods.

"Let me know what you find out."

I take pity on the fish and throw it back with the rest. Most of my life I've struggled with asthma: I know the feeling.

"What would he have to gain from this?" I wonder aloud.

Turning to the Dark Knight, I am stunned to realize there is nobody there. Batman disappeared. Doing a 360, I notice a dark figure hiding in the shadows on the nearest boat.

Huh.. Maybe the dark suit doesn't look so dumb in the daylight after all.

Dr. Harris smiles at me for the first time. My heart pounds. This can't be good.

"Didn't you say that you liked smoothies?"

I do like smoothies, but why does this feel like a test? I nod slowly.

"I hope you didn't eat anything too heavy this morning. We'll need to prep quite a bit of samples."

I narrow my eyes. Samples are typically liquid. How would we make fish.... Oh my God... This cannot be happening.

"Don't we need to test the water for excess nutrients? We don't want an algae bloom to form from the toxin."

There's a glint that forms underneath his unnecessarily large glasses.

"All in good time dear. We can worry about that after lunch."

Hoisting the barrel of Joker fish into the bed of his pick up truck, Dr. Harris teases down at me.

"After we prep those samples, how about fish and chips? I'm having a craving."

Part 3

The Intern: Outreach Gala

Another uneventful day for Gotham's environmental intern...

Part 1- Day one

Part 2- The Joker Fish

Part 4- The Billionaire Boys Club

Gotham's public library appears unrecognizable under the cloak of night. Broad leaves shroud the outside exterior of the Gothic pillars while ivy cascades down the large door frames. Harris raises an eyebrow.

"How many forests do you think Wayne destroyed in his quest to save the planet?" He questions with a smirk.

Each grey hair is perfectly gelled out of his face. Ditching his glasses for the occasion, Dr. Harris may actually care about tonight's guests. The bouncer outside the door seemed to think the dress code was not a laughing matter.

Taking his extended arm, I roll my eyes. The security guy nods to the two of us as we walk through the door.

"Professor, if you keep saying things like that Gordon's going to question your stances on Gotham's resident Eco-terrorist. " I whisper with a smile. "....but at least 12."

Thanks to the joint collaboration between Wayne Industries, Goth-corp, and the Gotham Department of Environmental Protection. Gotham City is hosting its first Environmental Outreach Gala for the nearby tri-state area. Unfortunately for me, they saddled the newest intern to do all the heavy lifting. Young joints and all that jazz. At least I got an invite. The invites ran out before the IT guy could get one. Poor Eddie.

My heart flutters a little bit as a realization hits me. I’m actually here… surrounded by giants in clean energy and the scientific community alike. Award-winning journalists... All for the future of our planet. Passing my reflection, I smile thinking of how far I’ve come from that little river rat back at home.

A figure in the corner of my eye draws my thoughts away from the Grandma debrief. Dick Grayson, the Billionaire’s son, charms the group of ladies by his side. I take a mental note to find time to talk to him when there isn’t such a big crowd. Having someone in Bruce Wayne’s ear might be an asset.

The walls echo with the idle chatter coming from the rich socialites of Gotham. Waiters in tuxedos maneuver silently with a tray of champagne flutes in each hand. Considering, that most environmental professionals wear cargo pants from the early 2000s to work... the dress code was definitely a choice. I scan the room for familiar faces. Gordon flashes me a smile from across the room. I nod back. The Mayor works his way around the room with a large smile. It must be an election year.

My throat gets tight. I'm not ready for this. Looking to my right, I find that Dr. Harris has vanished into the crowd.

"Y/N L/N?" A voice calls distracting me from my nerves.

A well-dressed man strolls over. Something about him puts me on edge. Maybe it's his wicked smile or the large emerald ring on his outstretched hand. He walks with an easy air of confidence.

"Lex Luthor."

My heart does a little tap dance in my chest. The tight fabric of my rental dress makes it hard to breathe. I shake his hand politely. The party-goers go quiet around us. From the corner of my eye, Lois Lane, an investigative reporter from Metropolis, shoves through the crowd. So much for being a fly on the wall.

"I recently worked with a Professor of yours. She had a lot to say about your graduate proposal."

This cannot be happening. Memories of those long fights in the lab flash in the back of my mind. Mr. Luthor's cat-like gaze observes my reaction curiously.

I cover my face in embarrassment. That woman deserves hate mail. I could have at least been asked to type or spell-check it beforehand.

"To be frank, I originally chose the topic to get a rise outta her. Dr. Hendrix had me doing dishes for 3 weeks straight after I accidentally messed up a sample, so I wrote a proposal I knew she wouldn't like."

When I finally uncover my face, Luthor stares down at me with an amused grin.

"Even so. I'd like to discuss potential funding opportunities in Metropolis. If this is something you would think up out of boredom, I'd love to see what you can do when you put your mind to it."

That brings a smile to my face.

"Really? Everyone who I've brought it up to has been apprehensive about researching Kryptionian radiation.

"We need more scientists to ask questions Ms. L/N. Even the ones, that people don't want to know the answer to. "

The sullen green glow draws my eye once again to Mr. Luthor's ring finger... Wait, that's not an emerald. That's Kryptonite.

"Is this a personal interest of yours?" I ask slowly glancing between his eyes and his ring.

"In some ways."

An unspoken conversation occurs when he notices my acknowledgement of his strange choice of jewelry. The silence only creates more questions. Why would you wear something you know is irradiated?

"I hope to hear from you soon." Mr. Luthor concludes after handing me a business card, "There is always a spot at Lexcorp for a future scientist with your talents."

I stand there in silence watching him leave. The sleek modern design of the card lists only the bare essentials: his name, office address, and contact information in silver lettering.

Four hours ago, I was hauling boxes for the decorating committee. Huh. A nearby waiter offers a champagne flute from the tray. Respectfully, I turn them down. This dress costs more than my rent.

“Oh no. Thank you. I am… working.”

"Does work-life balance not apply to interns?” A voice interrupts.

I try not to roll my eyes at the "intern" comment. The constant reminders of my status are getting old. Starting at his perfectly buffed dress shoes, my gaze drags along the fabric of his black designer suit. Dick Grayson sure does like to make an entrance. With his dark curls and friendly blue eyes, there's something familiar about him. I can't quite put my finger on it... Sipping on his drink, he waits for my response with a teasing grin. His energy is contiguous. I ignore his question to ask my own instead.

“Has anyone told you that you tend to appear out of nowhere?”

His striking eyes light up with a mischievous glint.

“You have no idea.” He laughs introducing himself, “I’m Dick Grayson.”

“So I’ve heard.” I joke gesturing to the envious eyes from across the room.

He raises a curious eyebrow.

“Good things I hope?”

Glancing around the room, I ignore the dozen eyes staring daggers in my direction. Academia can be such a bitch.

“Nothing too crazy: a few murders, unfounded accusations, and you might be an alien?”

Dick Grayson grimaces while tilting his head ever so slightly. He swirls his drink, yet doesn't take a sip.

“Sounds about right. Anything you believe? “

I pause... Do I play coy?

“I’m not sure an alien could do a quadruple summersault.”

Something flashes in his eyes that I don’t quite understand. For a moment, I wonder if I should have held my tongue. His suspicion morphs into the first genuine smile I've seen all evening.

“You’ve done your homework Ms. L/N.”

Before I can respond, a scream causes the ballroom to descend into chaos. Vines shoot out from under the floorboards while the native plants start attacking the guest. A woman with flaming red hair paces the floor. Her vines wrap around each person one by one…. A thorny bush springs out of a fallen leaf snagging my delicate rental dress.

Dammit Pamela. We talked about this.

Glancing at the bartender's horrified expression, I frown.

“I change my mind. I’ll have that drink now.”

They're Coming to Get You Barbara!