Every Step Of The Way | Regulus Black X Reader

Every Step Of The Way | Regulus Black x Reader

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ࣪˖⤷ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ࣪ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ˖ ⤷

Pairing: Regulus Black x GN!Reader WC: 1,213 CW: heavy talks of depression, depressive episode, depressed reader, self invalidation, no use of Y/N. Author's Note: I've been having a hard time lately and I just needed a comfort fic, this is purely based off my own experience with depression and how I feel when I'm in a depressive episode. If you don't feel like me that's okay, mental health is different for everyone! Just remember you're so valid and so loved <3. Summary: You're just having a hard time but Regulus is always there for you.

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At some point your mind wasn't supposed to be your enemy anymore right? At some point the ‘teen angst’ was supposed to go away and you were supposed to be an adult with relatively healthy mental health right?

The crippling depression and anxiety was supposed to go away with puberty. At least that's what you'd been told, that things would get better and your mind wouldn't mess with you as much.That was what was supposed to happen, but when do things ever go as planned?

The only difference between now and your teen years was that you recognized the symptoms faster, you understood what was coming before it was fully there. Now every so often you can catch it, do things to make the bad thoughts go away or lessen, then other times… you would feel paralyzed.

The numbness would consume you, invite you in like an old friend, along with the loss of appeal to do anything. You didn't want to eat, drink, read, or listen to music. 

You didn't want to do anything and sometimes without even realizing you would spent the whole day looking into nothingness. 

Regulus would notice the mood change almost immediately. He would pick up on the sign and the overall change in your personality.

Not only would he notice because he was hyper aware of the behavioral changes around him (thank you Walburga. Sarcasm) but also because he dealt with the same feelings. 

The emptiness and numbness of it all, it wasn't until Pandora explained it to him that he learned that those feelings were not exactly ‘normal’. 

It was normal to be sad, to have a depressive episode here and there especially following a tragedy but it was the consistency that wasn't normal.

The feeling of emptiness that always felt like a shadow following you, the feeling of being the happiest you've ever been but still feeling that emptiness in the back of your head.

It was one of the things you both shared. Sometimes it wasn't a good thing. When both of you were in that state of mind it was hard to help each other, to be there for each other.

How could you stop someone from drowning if you're drowning yourself? 

But other times it was a good thing. You knew each other's signs, you two could pick up on the signs before the other person even realized that they were slipping, sometimes. It gave you time to either try and stop it before it went too far or just get prepared. 

This was one of those times Regulus knew he needed to prepare. 

He had seen you starting to detach for about a day now. Regulus knew this was going to be one of those episodes he couldn't stop, the kind where you were there physically but not mentally.

You just were floating through your days, you were on auto pilot almost the whole day; you weren't really listening, hardly responded and if you did it was short.

Regulus preparing for this meant doing a few things, taking a few days off work, letting Sirius, Pandora and Barty know that he wouldn't be really available so that he could focus solely on you. Making sure your favorite foods were home and ready to encourage you to eat, having some of your favorite movies, books, everything and anything accessible in case you were in the mood to do anything or if you just wanted to try and distract yourself for a while.

It also meant mentally preparing himself to be understanding and patient since it wasn't exactly his strong suit but he'd do anything for you. 

When an episode fully hits it isn't always you wake up and start to feel depressed. Sometimes you would be fine most of the day and then suddenly you were hit with a wave of nothingness.

Most of the time nothing would trigger it, nothing would happen, your brain would just decide that it was time to be sad, to be numb, you guessed.

“Mon Amore, would you like to eat something? You can have anything you want.” Regulus touched the side of your face and brought you out of your head. You just shook your head not really looking at him. “No, thank you.” You whisper.

He just nodded and sat next to you. He knew when to pick his battles and since you ate that morning he knew this shouldn't be the hill he dies on. 

The rest of the night was spent mostly silence with a few words exchanged here and there, Regulus was there ready and willing to do whatever you needed him to do to make you feel better.

He got you to eat a little eventually and you shared a shower with him. He had helped you wash yourself since you didn't have any motivation or energy to do so. 

By the end of the night you were both cuddled up in bed while Regulus ran his hand up and down your back just to let you know he was there.

He liked when you knew he was there, he felt like it helped even just a little, especially to make you feel a little less alone.

Eventually you broke the silence with a sight. “I'm sorry.” You felt regulus's hand stop moving, he stayed silent for a moment.

“Why are you apologizing? You haven't done anything.” By the sound of his voice you knew he was frowning, he knew exactly why you were apologizing but a part of him was hoping, praying, that he was wrong.

“For being this way. You shouldn't have to deal with this. We're not kids anymore, I should be over these feelings by now.”

Regulus sat up, making you sit up in the process, reaching over to the lamp on the bedside table turning the light on. “Do you choose to feel this way? Do you make the conscious decision to feel like this?” Regulus was looking you in the eyes with raised eyebrows waiting for a response.

“Not necessarily, but-”

“Exactly, you don't. You can't control your emotions. You didn't ask to feel this way nor do you choose to. There's no point in apologizing for something that you have no control over. Your brain is amazing and beautiful but sometimes it isn't the nicest to you and that's okay. Do you know why? Because even if your brain is mean sometimes it still makes you who you are and you're so amazing, mon cœur. We’ll take care of this together like we always do. It's going to be hard sometimes but it is not impossible, and I'll always be here with you every step of the way, because I love you more than anything, tu es ma raison de vivre, mon amour.”

Regulus cupped your cheek and whipped a few tears you didn't know you had shedded. All you could do was whisper a ‘thank you’ as you threw yourself in his arms. 

You fell asleep that night in Regulus’s arms while he whispered sweet nothing to you.

You weren't better by any means but you felt loved, you felt understood. You knew that no matter how hard things got, Regulus would be there for you, every step of the way.

⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹

*sigh*

Sometimes I get happy bc of a fanfic then remember I’m reading a fanfic

Barbara: I swear I'm the only one here with a braincell.

The other batkids: All hail the keeper of the sacred braincell!

OH ok ok ok…

Can I maybe request a Pandora x shy!reader who has a crush on Pandora but obviously just admires from a distance; but Pandora Be Knowing (tm) - maybe Pandora just starts inserting herself into readers daily routine and readers like “?!?!?!” and Pandora’s like “!!🥰😇🤗!!”

Hope this is enough? You can message me if you want more 😉 xx

Universes Mistake | Pandora Rosier x Reader

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ࣪˖⤷ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ࣪ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ˖ ⤷

Pairing: Pandora Rosier x Fem!Shy!Reader WC: 2,431 CW: Use of Y/N, kinda hints of more social anxiety and awkwardness than shy (??), Reader gets anxious and overthinks. Author's Note: My first request damn😮‍💨 I'm sorry it's taken so long I’ve just had like no motivation? it kinda looks like that been kinda going around rn tho? idk maybe somethings in the air lol. I really hope you like it tho. Summary: You've liked Pandora for years but with you being painfully shy you just like her from a distance but Pandoras not having that.

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The first thing you did every time you walked into one of the few classes that you shared with her was look for her. 

She was just so amazing that you couldn't help but like her.. a lot. She was always so sweet to the people that were important to her. She was always so happy, so lively, she just seemed so carefree. Always laughing and smiling.

Merlin, that smile. What you wouldn't do to have her smile at you.

You’ve liked her since second year.

You were sitting under a tree by The Black Lake reading, you were almost completely lost in your book but then your attention was stolen when you heard talking and laughing. 

Walking past you was Regulus Black, Barty Crouch Jr, Dorcas Meadowes, Evan Rosier and her, Pandora Rosier.

They didn't notice you but you noticed them. 

You remember when you heard her laugh the first time, how it made your heart speed up, how your hands got all clammy, how you felt the heat crawling up your face. How you felt like you couldn't breathe.

You were captivated.

You started to notice her everywhere, classes, halls, the library, it felt like she had consumed your life in the best way possible. 

You had always been the shy type, finding it hard to talk to people, making friends, you would get embarrassed easier than you probably should, you'd get easily nervous so you had always just kept to yourself, you were alone. That's how you liked it.. or at least that's what you told yourself. 

So you were fine with the fact that she didn't notice you. You were happy and content with existing in the same space as her.

When you walked into Divination you noticed she wasn't there yet. You tried not to let yourself feel disappointed so you decided that in the meantime you would just take your normal seat in the back and get ready for class while letting yourself hope in the back of your mind that you'll see her at some point.

You were so focussed on getting ready for class and you didn't notice that someone had sat at the chair across from you until you heard her. “Hello, Y/N.” Your movements froze at the sound of her voice as if you were just hit with the ‘Glacius’ charm. You slowly looked up, trying to control your breathing. 

Social interactions, talking to people made you quite nervous but most of the time it was manageable. Talking to Pandora though? That was something you would have never even considered. 

You were content with just seeing her, from a distance that is.

“Um, H-hello Pandora?” You internally cringed when you stuttered and your sentence came out more like a question instead of just a normal greeting. 

But Pandora just smiled at you, not in a teasing way but in a way that had you get butterflies in your stomach, a way that made your heart skip a beat.

To your relief before the conversation could continue the professor started class and for the next hour and a half you were sitting next to Pandora Rosier trying not to completely freak out or embarrass yourself. 

When the class was dismissed you were out of there within seconds. You had never packed up and left a class so fast before. You were rushing to your next class trying to put distance between you and Pandora.

It's not that you didn't want to talk to her, it was just you didn't know how to talk to her. 

How do you just talk to the girl that you’ve basically been in love with for years? How do you talk to someone that just made your heart melt by saying ‘Hello’ to you? 

How do you talk to someone that makes you want to give her your everything just to hear your name fall off her lips again?

The rest of the day you were distracted by the thoughts of Pandora. You had shared classes with her for years. Why all the sudden did she sit with you? Why did she suddenly talk to you? Maybe she was just being nice? She was a nice person. That was one of the things you loved about her. It just never seemed like she knew you existed, let alone knew your name.

It had been a few days since Pandora had talked to you. She hadn't tried talking to you since.. admittedly it might have something to do with the fact that you didn't share many classes together and you might have also been actively avoiding her.. but who knows?

So that weekend you were in the library studying for a Charms test that was coming up. The library was quite empty since most people were off at Hogsmeade, you never went unless necessary which wasn't often. You liked how empty the castle was on Hogsmeade weekends. It was nice to just calm down for a while.

Especially because you had been spending the better part of the week running around trying to avoid Pandora.

At this point though you were willing to put the whole thing behind you. Just forget about it, move on, act like it never happened. Just chalk it up to a mistake made by the universe, something that would never happen again.

The universe didn't seem to appreciate your thought of it making a mistake because it was apparently wishful thinking to assume it wouldn't happen again.

Your head snapped up at the sudden sound of a chair being dragged on the floor. Across the table from you was Pandora, she sat across from you silently reading a book. She had a faint smile on her face but she seemed focused on her book.

You silently took a deep breath internally debating if you should leave or not.

You were there first. She didn't make it seem like she wanted you to leave. Maybe she wanted your company? Why else would she sit with you? Especially when there were so many empty tables.

You made the choice to stay and keep studying. Neither of you said a word the whole time you were there. You would look at her every so often but she did seem to move at all.

You hadn't realized how much time had passed until Pandora suddenly closed her book and stood up. You looked up at her surprised by her movements, based on the smile on her face you most likely looked as surprised as you felt. “It's dinner time. You should take a break and eat… Goodnight Y/N.” With that Pandora practically floated away, her smile never fading.

You felt your breath get caught in your throat. You mind started to race a bit. Why did she sit with you almost all day? What was her sudden interest in you? 

You started to feel a headache creep into the back of your head, because of that you decided to take her advice. To eat dinner and then just go to bed. Once again you just wanted to brush today off as a mistake made by the universe.

Well apparently the universe really likes proving you wrong because the weeks following that day you and Pandora found yourselves in an unspoken schedule.

After classes you would sit at your normal table in the back of the library and start to study then Pandora would sit with you reading or working in silence till it was time for dinner, she always said the same thing by the end. ‘It's dinner time. You should take a break and eat.’ then she would wish you a goodnight and walk away. 

You got used to having Pandora around. You stated to grow comfortable around her. You like being around her. You started to become comfortable with your routine.

Today was different though you only knew that when you grew closer to your table and you saw Pandora already there. In the few weeks you two had sat together you had always gotten there first. Pandora would usually follow after about ten minutes, today she beat you there.

Slowly and hesitantly you walked to the table trying to calm your anxiety. As you got closer to the table you notice that Pandora didn’t have her school bag with her but a picnic basket. 

“Hello Y/N. I know normally we sit here but I was wondering if you were interested in going on a little adventure with me.” Her voice was as soft as silk and fuck that smile. She could get you to do anything with that smile. 

So who were you to deny her?

You silently agreed with a nod of your head not trusting your voice. After she had gotten the picnic basket in one hand she slowly reached for your arm with her other as if asking you if it was okay, you once again nodded in agreement. Pandora linked your arms together with a smile on her face and then she led you out of the castle. 

You two silently walked together arm and arm toward The Forbidden Forest. You started to slow your walking when you realized where she was leading you to, you sent her a questioning look. “We'll be fine, I promise. You'll like where we're going.” 

A big part of you trusted Pandora more than you'd like to admit, but you couldn't help but be hesitant. You never went into The Forbidden Forest. You had heard the horrible stories rumors of past students that had ventured off into the forest and the beasts that resided in it. 

The idea of going in scared the hell out of you but with a simple squeeze of your arm and that damn smile you started to happily follow her in.

As you walked into the forest you realized it wasn't as terrifying as people made it out to be. It was actually quite beautiful in its own way the farther you walked in. Sure it was dark and sometimes the shadows would play tricks on your mind but having Pandora help more than you thought it would.

She somehow managed to calm and spike your anxiety all at the same time.

Eventually she led you to a small clearing surrounded by fireflies, trees, small hills and a lake with grass and flowers covering the floor. Close by there was something that appeared to be a wooden arch, you felt your eyes widen when you noticed what was laying under the arch.

There were two unicorns lying next to each other, they seemed to be sleeping. It was a unicorn den and it was breathtaking. 

While you were distracted by the beauty of the clearing and the shock of the unicorns Pandora had managed to set up a little picnic. There were small sandwiches, fruits and candies. She was already sitting down on the picnic blanket patting the spot next to her to have you join her.

You silently sat down next to her, your thoughts consuming you. You didn't want your overthinking to ruin this moment but you couldn't help it.

You had followed her into the ‘dangerous’ Forbidden Forest blindly. You had let her come into your life more than you thought you ever would. You had started to grow comfortable with her. Why was she doing this? Part of you was scared it was just a sick and twisted prank, but the rational side of you knew better Pandora wasn't that type of person, she wouldn't do that to someone (unless that someone deserved it). You just had to know why.

“Pandora? Can I ask you something?” For a moment you thought that your voice was too quiet for her to hear but it seems you were wrong since Pandora turned to give you all her attention with a small nod to let you know she was listening. 

It took all your courage to start talking, to not back down. “Why the sudden interest in me? We've shared classes for years now and I didn’t even know you knew my name until you sat with me in Divination. I'm just confused.”

Pandora looked away for a moment as if she was processing your words. “I've always known who you were, Y/N. I also know how shy you are, I never wanted to make you uncomfortable. So I was waiting for the perfect moment to introduce myself.. but I realized that there's no such thing as the perfect moment.”

You couldn't help but be skeptical about her answer, it made no sense to you. What was the need for a ‘perfect moment’? “Why would you need a ‘perfect moment’ just to try to be my friend?” 

A small smile spread across Pandora's face while a soft chuckle fell from her lips. She looked at you with those beautiful eyes, honesty with a hint of amusement lingered in them. 

“Who said I wanted to be your friend?” Before you could completely process what she meant her hand cupped the side of your face while her thumb crested your cheek softly. “I don't want to be just your friend, Y/N. I want to hold your hand, to take you on dates, I want to spoil you rotten and I really want to kiss you.”

To say you were stunned by her answer was an understatement. You could faintly hear your heart in your ears while a shiver ran down your back.

This felt like a dream. You had dreamt about this, more times than you could count. The only way you knew this was real was because you could still feel her hand on your cheek. You could feel how soft her hand was, how warm it was against your cold skin. It felt perfect. 

You two felt perfect. 

Pandora was eccentric, lively and so free. You tend to keep to yourself, you're quiet and observant. You balanced each other out. 

You don't know what came over you but before you could talk yourself out of it you softly pressed your lips to Pandoras'. Your heart started to race as your lips met hers. A wave of warmth washed over you as you relished in the feeling of Pandora's soft lips. 

You drew back slightly, and you felt your breath catch in your throat, your cheeks felt hot. As you look into Pandora's eyes, you saw a beautiful mixture of sweetness and love in them.

She smiled at you and pulled you in for another kiss as soft and perfect as the last one.

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Music Notes | Barty Crouch Jr x Reader

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ࣪˖⤷ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ࣪ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ˖ ⤷

Pairing: Rockstar!Barty x GN!Rockstar!Reader WC: 3,471 CW:  Soulmate AU, Rockstar AU, 2010's AU, use of Y/N, mentions of anxiety, swearing Author's Note: This is one of those fics where I'm my own target audience but if you read this I really hope you like it. Also I feel like Pandora get kinda out of character at the end but I just idk I felt like it was necessary. Summary: You meat your soulmate during the best summer of your life.

Volume:■■■■■■■■■■□□

Everyone is born with a symbol of something that you and your soulmate(s) will have in common along with their initials, and when you look into their eyes for the first time your soulmark is supposed to tingle. 

The symbol could be literally anything, it could be related to your career, a hobie, a passion or in your case all the above. For as long as you could remember you've had a music note and the initials BCJ on your wrist.

But for the longest time you were confused by your soulmark, you weren't really interested in music. I mean you liked listening to it as much as the next person but not enough to make it your soulmark.

That was until you were twelve and you met Jade. She was just so outgoing and bubbly, she made friends easily, she'd walk into a room and demand attention without even trying and she soon started showing you all these bands and artists you'd never heard of. Jade changed everything for you, she showed you a side of music you didn't know existed. And all of a sudden, you were hooked.

You became so inthralled by the music that the initial next to the note paled in comparison, you hardly thought about your soulmate because as far as you were concerned music was your soulmate. 

When you were fourteen Jade introduced you to Sammy. Sammy was a pretty shy, and quiet kid but once he was comfortable he'd talk your ear off for hours. That's how he continued to expand your love for music. Not only did he tell you about more bands and artists that ranged outside of the emo, pop punk scene, but he showed you shows, concerts. 

You, Jade and Sammy would go to any show you could. House shows, backyard gigs, if there was a guitar riff and a mosh pit the three of you were there. And that's how you met Pink.

Now Pink’s real name was Floyd but he liked being called Pink. Which you always thought was funny considering he was the strong, silent type, so the name completely contradicted his personality but he liked David Bowie so who were you to judge? Pink was your tipping point. He was a beast on the drums, you and Sammy would sit there and listen to him play all day. Which somehow led to Pink convincing your little group that you guys could make a band, a killer band at that.

And surprisingly he wasnt fucking wrong thus ‘Fighting Pixies’ was born.

C. Summer of 2012

It was the first day of Warped Tour and you couldn't be more excited. You were so excited that you didn't even care that you were in some random arena parking lot sweating your ass off in Utah. 

Not only was this Fighting Pixies first year playing Warped Tour but you were on a main stage you were going to be playing on the same stage as the bands you grew up listening to. To say the feeling was surreal would be an understatement. This is what you, Jade, Sammy and Pink have been working towards for years, you guys were finally playing the festival that you would go to every summer. 

Walking out of the bus you started making your way to the catering tent by yourself since the rest of the band left you behind because you were apparently in Pinks’ words ‘taking too goddamn long’. You roll your eyes at his words thinking how it's bullshit that they could just leave you like that, when all the sudden you collide with someone. 

“Oh shit I'm so sorry dude.”

“You alright mate?”

You and the mystery person that you just basically assaulted said at the same time. Finally after gaining your balance you look at your victim. 

“Siri?” You say raising your eyebrow when he finally looks your way with a big smile on his face.

“Oh shit Y/N! How are you? I havent seen you in fucking ages!” Sirius yells while bringing you into a hug, you hug him back laughing then pulling away.

“I've been good. I haven't seen you since you, Rem and James came to one of our shows. Is he here?” You ask, looking around hoping to catch sight of Remus.

“No not yet, he's back home with Reg, Lily and Harry. But they'll be joining us for the last few shows.”

You couldn't help but let out a little laugh. “Baby's first Warped Tour? I like it, gotta start them young.”

Sirius laughed at you, the two of you then continued on your way to the catering tent. Luckily with no further incidents.

You and the rest of Fighting Pixies met Sirius a few years ago when he collabed on a song with you guys, you also had gotten to meet James a few times during the recording process. You hadn't met the rest of ‘Beyond London’ yet, but James had made it very clear that you and their bassist, Pandora, would become fast friends. 

But you hadn’t heard much about their guitarist, Barty, except in passing from mutual friends. Sirius would complain about him sometimes but in typical lead singer fashion Sirius had a tendency to be dramatic so you never really took anything he said about Barty to heart.

Eventually you and Sirius got to the catering tent. You found your band, James and a girl you recognized as Pandora sitting at a table together. 

“Well if it isn't the second best drummer on Warped Tour.” You say with a teasing smile sitting across from James. James just laughs and shakes his head. While pink has a small smug look on his face. 

“What? So Pink’s the best drummer on tour?” James raises his eyebrow at you with a goofy smile still on his face. 

You laugh and shake your head. “No, not even close, Angelo is clearly the best drummer here. Have you heard Motionless in White’s breakdowns?” Pink then glared at you while scoffing. What? Someone has to bring his ego down.

After a few hours of making fun of each other, hanging out, watching a few bands sets and getting to know Pandora (who is literally the sweetest person ever) you and the rest of your band had to go back to the bus to get ready for your set in a few hours.

You got to get into the shower after Jade so after your shower and skin routine you walked out into the common area plopping down at the table so you could start to get your hair and other things done. 

“Dude when you were in the bathroom Sirius came over and brought Barty, dudes funny. You missed out.” Sammy said, sitting down next to you eating a bowl of cereal.

“Damn. Well I have a whole summer to run into him at some point.” You shrug, getting all your stuff out to get ready.

You actually really wanted to meet Barty based on what little you had heard about him over the years, the fact that he was one hell of a guitarist, and you'd never admit this to anymore but you were really attracted to him. Based purely off the pictures you've seen of him.

You had a lot of respect for him as a musician, you could recognize the emotions that he put into each riff, solo, hell just a strum and you could tell what he was feeling.

A part of you found it frustrating that after all these years of knowing Sirius and James you had always seemed to miss Barty, sometimes by literal minutes.

The rest of your band had met him in passing, never more than a ‘hi’ or ‘hey’ but still they've met him. 

So you couldn't help but be a little frustrated at the fact that for one of the only times that day where you weren't around your band they actually got to hang out with him. You don't know why it bothered you so much, I mean you couldn't even be upset with anyone in particular. It's literally no one's fault. So why did it bother you so much?

Eventually you and the rest of Fighting Pixies found yourselves waiting backstage to go on when you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned to see your new favorite blond girl. 

“Hi Pandora. What's up?”

“Hi. I just came to watch the beginning of your set. I won't be able to stay long, by the time you lot get off we'll have just started our set.” Pandora explains with her signature tooth rotting smile. 

“Aw thanks, I was actually planning on heading to your guys' set when we're done here.”

“Yes, you should!” Pandora stood up straighter with a sense of excitement and urgency about something you didn't understand, but you just thought that it was Pandora being Pandora. 

You had heard over the years that she would do or say things that didn't make much sense to really anyone so you chose to just brush it off.

“Oh I also wanted to give you theses.” Pandora says while handing you two rocks.

You take the rocks confused with a raised eyebrow. “Thanks, but what are they?”

“The orange one is citrine and the pink one is rose quartz. They're meant to bring you good luck, just put them in your pocket and they'll do their job.” Pandora says with a knowing type of smile, that once again confused you but you just nodded and put them in your pocket choosing not to question the blond.

“Y/N come on, it's time to go.” One of the stage hands says passing you your guitar. You just nodded, putting the strap over your head.

“Well I hope you like our set and I'll see you at yours.” You chuckled a little as she just nodded.

You would think after all of these years of doing this you'd be used to it at this point. That you would be used to being on stage, that the anxiety of fucking up would be gone but it didn’t go away, lessened yeah but not gone. 

You also never really get used to people singing lyrics that you wrote or helped write, especially when the words were sentimental to you at one point, but it was kind of nice to know that those words are sentimental to others now too.

You wouldn't trade this for the world. You were lucky and you knew that, so many people would kill for this chance so you didn't take it for granted.

Thirty minutes later you and your band mates were running off stage sweaty and high off adrenaline with big smiles on your faces’ your first show at your first warped tour was beyond amazing it was fucking perfect you were convinced nothing could top this feeling.

You started to make your way to Beyond London’s set. The rest of the band had other sets or people that they wanted to see so you went your separate ways for the time being. 

Eventually you made it to the stage Beyond London was playing at. You had stopped a few times to talk to people and take pictures but luckily not too many people stopped you so you made it when they started to play their last song.

After all the years you had known Sirius and James you had never actually got the chance to see them play. To say they were amazing felt like the understatement of the century. 

James looked like he was in his element on the drums, Pandora was so focused on her bass but that didn't stop her from swinging herself around, Sirius had basically every person either swooning because of his looks or crying because of how beautiful his voice was and then there was Barty. 

Just the sight of him alone made your heart skip a beat, you had never seen such raw emotion while someone played the guitar. Once your eyes landed on him you couldn't, you wouldn't, look away. The way he moved, how he would throw his head back every so often, sometimes you could see his jaw clench, you could tell he put his all into the music. You had never seen something so amazing. So perfect.

The song ended and they all started to make their way to the side of the stage you were on, Barty sayed a little longer then his band mates throwing things like his picks and set lists into the crowd. 

You were brought into a bear hug and spun around by a very sweaty Sirius. You shrieked and tried to push yourself away from him to no avail.

“Sirius Black if you don't put me down right now I'll make sure you never play another show again!” You screamed threatened while continuing your best efforts to get away from your sweaty attacker. Suddenly you hear a gasp and you're put down very quickly, almost falling while Sirius scoffs and mutters something about ‘Some people’. 

Pandora came to your rescue making sure you’re okay. You were about to scold Sirius for almost making you fall, but he was already out of sight. Pandora turned you around to have you look at her. 

You looked at her very surprised with your eyebrows raised. “What is up with the manhandling right now?” you laugh slightly awkwardly. 

“Do you still have the crystals I gave you?” Pandora asks with a serious face completely ignoring your question. 

You furrowed your brows and nodded still very confused. “Considering you gave them to me a little over an hour ago, yes. I know we don't know each other very well but have some faith in me Pandora.” You once again laughed a little trying to ease the little tension that seemed to form.

Pandora just smiled at you and hugged you and whispered. “I'm so happy for you two.”

You pulled away and looked at her once again beyond confused. “What-”

You were then interrupted by James yelling over to you. “Y/N, come meet Barty, finally.” Pandora kept smiling at you and then she just nodded at you encouragingly. For what felt like the hundredth time that day Pandora confused you and you once again just chalked it up to Pandora being Pandora.

While making your way over to the three men that stood in a little circle probably talking about the show that they just put on, you were hit with a sudden wave of anxiety. 

Why were you anxious? You had been fine (other than the major confusion you went through with Pandora)  so why does it feel like your heart is going a mile a minute.

Sirius and James are facing you while Barty’s back is towards you. As soon as you're in arms length Sirius wraps his arm around your shoulder pulling you close to him.

“Barty, this is Y/N. Y/N, Barty.” James says motioning between you two.

“Hi, it's nice to finally-” You cut yourself off when you looked into his eyes, feeling a tingle on your writs.

Your whole life you've heard stories about what meeting your soulmate felt like. How all of a sudden everything seemed less important. How you would only want to focus on that person. How you'd feel like you had a new meaning to life. Honestly you thought it was all bullshit. 

But now you knew that, that was all an understatement. 

You finally felt like you were home, like everything would be okay. It felt like breathing for the first time. 

You could play a million more shows, meet your idols, win a fucking Grammy and nothing would compare to what you were feeling when you met his eyes. And based on the look on his face, Barty felt the same way.

“Hi.” You whispered still in a shocked state.

“Hi, angel.” Barty said softly with a love sick look on his face, your heart skips a beat at the nickname and you can't help but smile. He suddenly moved his eyes to Sirius and glared at him. “You'll move your arm if you know what's good for you, Black.” 

Sirius moved his arm away from around you and put his hands up in surrender, you actually forgot Sirius and James were there let alone that Sirius had an arm wrapped around you.

You hadn't thought about your soulmate in years. You didn't ever think you'd meet them, and a part of you didn't really care if you did honestly. As long as you had your music and friends you were fine, that's what you thought at least. It was crazy how in one moment that whole mindset could change.

Now you couldn't imagine a life without Barty. You didn't want to imagine a life without him. 

For so long music was your number one priority, you didn't care about much else but now this person that you just met became your number one. It felt insane and crazy but you couldn't help it and a big part of you loved it. 

You and Barty found yourselves sitting in Beyond London's tour bus talking during the almost eight hour drive from Salt Lake City to Denver. You two just talked about your lives, childhoods, things you loved, things you hated, everything. 

He told you about his Father who you now hated almost as much as Barty. Barty had the biggest smile on his face when you told him how you felt about his father in extreme detail after the stories he told you.

Eventually you both noticed the buses pulling into a new arena parking lot while the sun was rising. Both of you knew you had to go back to your bus now, you had sets and meet and greets later that day. You needed some kind of energy. 

Barty with a cheeky smile insisted that you just join him in his bunk, you just responded with an eye roll and a ‘You wish’ which earned you a ‘You have no idea’.

Barty ended up walking you to your bus, you and him stood outside of the bus talking and stalling, not wanting to leave each other yet.

“Barty, I have to go. We need to get some sleep.” You were looking down at your hands together knowing one you needed to let go but not wanting to.

“I know angel, I know.” He gave you a sad smile as if he would never see you again. 

Barty was often scared that all of this was just a dream. That one day he would wake up back in his fathers clutches and his life as a rockstar was just a dream, it always scared him. But now in his mind it wasn't only his life as a rockstar at stake but you and that now terrified him. He had admitted this to you while you were talking that night so you didn't blame him for being hesitant. You just hugged him trying to reassure him.

“You can come over when you wake up Barty. Don't hesitate, I don't care if I'm awake or asleep. I just know that if you stay we're not gonna get any sleep.” Barty pulls away from you with a smirk and raised eyebrows, you just hit his chest and roll your eyes. “Not like that. I just mean we'll stay up talking.”

He just laughs and kisses your forehead. “I know what you meant, angel, just like teasing you is all.” He pulls you against him resting his chin on your head. “Is it bad to say I'll miss you? Even if I know it's just a few hours.”

“It's not bad because I'll miss you too.” You whisper against him. 

After a moment he pulls away again looking down at you he moves his hand to hold the side of your face, cressing you cheek with his thumb. You leaned into his touch with a small smile on your face looking up at him.

“You are now the most important thing in my life now, my angel.” He's looking deep into your eyes, not a hint of lies or regret in his words.

Barty started to lean down with a sense of hesitation, you just nodded and smiled at him letting him know it was okay. You could feel butterflies in your stomach while your heart started to race. The moment your lips touched you felt electricity run through your veins. You never experienced such an amazing feeling, you were two puzzle pieces finally coming together. You already knew Barty was your everything but that kiss solidified it. It made it real in the best way possible, you knew you couldn't ask for a better soulmate.

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