Having These Kind Of Instrusive Thoughts Again

Having these kind of instrusive thoughts again 

I dreamed of you last night

Funny thing how only good things came up

Like the way you kissed my knuckles when I was anxious 

How I fitted in your embrance like a second home

I saw myself in your hands again And my inner world stayed still ‘cause I’ve missed the peace you offered me.

We’ve been silent for so long Please understand there is not many things left to say when two souls connect this way.

We only needed time And no one spared us a minute.

I just sent out my two last essays for this semester and I feel super drained. Hot cocoa and Laventer are good potion for relaxation and recovery, as much as I can get until Monday that my next semester begins  ...  

I saw this in my dream, so enjoyyyy

[17:10] Every word Minhyuk said in the last couple of minutes had come in from one ear and out of the other as I was looking the oh so familiar scenery with frantic eyes. Given their masks and beanies, the six of them seemed to not worry about their faces being recognized, but given I was the one that proposed the greek island as an isolated vacation spot I was frantic. Shownu’s and Jooheon’s broad shoulders blocked my sight and I could hear Kihyun’s and Changkyun’s blabbering mixing with the car noises somewhere on my right, as well as Hyungwon’s deep calm voice conversing with their manager on the phone behind me. Minhyuk was right by my side, as always, trying to calm me down by patting my head. Being able to have them all in my peripheral vision and earshot kinda made me feel serene and I tried to enjoy our walk.  

           I stepped away from Minhyuk’s fingers and I tried to ignore the hurtful expression his features held the exact same second. Normally I would be all about his childish giddiness, that’s what made us adjoined in the hip two months ago, but today I could not bare physical touch, despite how much I craved it at the same time. I was pretty sure not a soul knew them here, but there were a lot that knew me, even though I never wanted to face them again. Phobia of running into an unpleasant surprise was keeping me from creating new beautiful memories with them in this beautiful place. Minhyuk knew everything about it, being closer to me than any of them and it was not his fault that I was being paranoic.

           So I smiled at him and I offered my wrist for him to hold into, something that he liked to do in order to keep track of my pulse when my anxiety was acting up. We were nearing the small green lighthouse that helps the boats and ships find their way in the dark, salt water splashing our faces and smearing our glasses and a laugh bubbled in me spilling happy giggles to the seven of us. We gathered around the stone bench facing the water and I silently admired the boys that have redefined my world in such short period of time, tracking their conversation. I was not fluent in Korean yet but I caught my name and I raised my eyebrow, in which the boys laughed and Minhyuk became red all over and hid his face in my hair.

           I became a nervous reck as soon as I started spotting familiar faces around me and I mindlessly searched for Minhyuk’s hand only to realize he was not beside me. I fiddled my own fingers for a couple of seconds searching for him. Our eyes soon locked and he was immediately glued on my side – he could easily read me like an open book. He was wearing his gloves to protect himself from the cold wind but I needed the comfort his skin could provide me so I pushed the hem away from his wrist and I slipped my cold fingers beside his. He shuddered hard and opened his mouth to say something, only to close it again right after.

My smirk was wiped right off my face when he leaned down to peck my lips, so now I was the blushing mess and he had the confident ass smirk plasterd on his face-oh how the tables turn. Jooheon and Shownu were howlering with laughter, Kihyun and Hyungwon were scritching  at the top of their lungs and Changkyun was gagging   right in my ear, but inside this mess I found peace and no longer cared which old nightmare I had to face if they were to stand by my side.    

Im Changkyun imagine

This was requested by a very dear friend of mine <3 

[01:20] Eyes wide open, without blinking once, my gaze blurred at the corners of my sight and I close them again in frustration, only for colourful dots to splash my eyelids, yet again. My insomniac tendencies were catching up with me again and the poor man lightly snoring by my side was at no fault. I have slept over in the dorms countless times, with the boys fighting over who was worthy enough to cuddle me to sleep every night. I have fallen asleep in Changkyun’s bed before as well, this time was not different. I was not hungry, I was not cold or particularly hot and, by some sort of miracle, I did not want to pee. I just could not sleep. Maybe I was the sleeping pill of the whole team of little monsters, but I guess they did not have the same effect on me.

           Kyun had his arm hooked around my waist, snoring away in a blissful, dreamless sleep and I was low-key jealous. I knitted my fingers through some strands of hair at the base of his neck and I whined when he did not even flinch at the action. I retreated, scolding myself for even thinking of waking him up to save my pathetic ass from the insomnia goblin. Trying to swift myself away from his grasp, I did not notice that he was slowly waking up. He prompted himself on the elbow of his free hand and whispered lowly “You cannot sleep again, can you?”

           I jolted at the sound of his husky, sleeping voice, a hand flying to my chest, as I narrowed my eyes at him. “You scared the living hell out of me!” I was leaning on the headboard, making it a little difficult for him to cuddle me, so he started rubbing my sides and shushing me like a small child. I was pretty much ready to open my mouth to curse at him, when all of a sudden he leaned up, lips capturing mine in a sleepy, sloppy kiss. His lips were warm on mine and I felt myself relax and slid down the headboard, coming to rest close to Changkyun’s body warmth. He rested his head under my chin, warm breath fanning on my neck, which added to the soothing rubbing on my sides and the twingling on my lips, making me drowsy. “It was not that hard now, was it?” was the last murmurs I heard before falling asleep at last.