*post S8*

*post s8*

Hyde, gesturing to the guy talking to Red: So, that's your new boyfriend?

Jackie, smiling at her boyfriend: Yep, that's him. Isn't he the sweetest?

Hyde: That's cool.

*later, after one too many beers*

Hyde, mimicking Jackie: Isn't he the sweetest?

Hyde: That's not cool.

Hyde: I hope he dies.

Jackie's boyfriend: We can hear you.

Hyde: Good.

a while ago i saw a tiktok about a woman who wore a white dress to her son's wedding because she hated her daughter-in-law. the sister-in-law, who also had a terrible relationship with her mother, got wine all over the dress and the woman had to go home and change.

pam burkhart is the kind of mother who would wear white to her own daughter's wedding and nobody can tell me otherwise.

and i think kitty would be the one to throw wine at her dress and kick her out of the ceremony.

but that's it. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

Hyde: *bleeding out*

Eric: hyde, you’re bleeding, what’s your type?

Hyde: hot, brunette, loud, loves unicorns-

Eric: no man, you’re blood type

Hyde: red

Jackie: I think we should get a divorce.

Hyde: What are you doing?

Jackie: Just practicing.

Hyde, confused: Why are you planning our hypothetical divorce?

Jackie: I don't know, I'm 20. I think I'm having a... quarter life crisis.

Hyde: We aren't even married yet.

Jackie: Hypothetically divorce me.

Hyde: Okay, then I'm hypothetically taking half of your assets.

Jackie: Well, you didn't sign the hypothetical prenup... is it? It's called a prenup, right?

Eric: Yeah, it's a prenup, and you did hypothetically sign one so...

Jackie: What are you doing here?

Eric: I'm his hypothetical lawyer in this divorce case.

Jackie: Well, then I'm taking the hypothetical kids so– right? We can get those, right?

Donna: Yes, we can definitely get the hypothetical kids, don't worry about it.

Hyde: And what the fuck is this hypothetical nerd doing here?

Jackie: This is my hypothetical lawyer and we've been hypothetically sleeping with each other so...

Hyde: How could you hypothetically– How could you hypothetically do this to me?

Jackie: Because you hypothetically are an alcoholic, so.

i had to ask my little sister to help me, i feel so old

that '70s show as tiktok trends; part one

song: bills bills bills by destiny's child

*part 1 here*

Hyde, still drunk: Why is he even here?

Jackie's boyfriend: You got a problem with me, man?

Jackie: Oh God...

Hyde, slurring: Yes, I do. I should be getting back together with my chick, but you're ruining my plans, dumbass.

Jackie, muttering to herself: What did I do to deserve this? I just wanted to have dinner.

Jackie's boyfriend: You're so full of shit.

Jackie: I knew I should've ordered a pizza. [looks at her friends and the Formans] You're just gonna sit there and watch?

Fez: It is more entertaining this way.

*now Hyde and Jackie's boyfriend are fighting*

Jackie's boyfriend: Ow, my eye!

Kelso: Hey, that's my line, man!

Hyde, after getting punched in the face: I'm too drunk for this.

Jackie: GET OFF MY BOYFRIEND!

Everybody:

Eric: Just to be clear, which one are you referring to?

Kelso: I have nothing to do with this.

Jackie: Uh... the one that's actually my boyfriend? [grabs the bottle of tequila and leaves the room] Excuse me, I need a drink.

Donna: Man, I missed all this drama!