Redneckgremlin00 - My Trash - Tumblr Blog
A meme
How does Scotland feel about Shrek? Being Scottish and all
Scotland: *stares and blinks slowly before whispering*“Me? Feel about that? Well…I only have one thing to say about…someBODY ONCE TOLD ME-”
England: *shrieks in rage in the distance*
How does Scotland feel about Shrek? Being Scottish and all
Scotland: *stares and blinks slowly before whispering*“Me? Feel about that? Well…I only have one thing to say about…someBODY ONCE TOLD ME-”
England: *shrieks in rage in the distance*
This , THIS is a man y’all not no sissy that’s the kinda man I want🖤😍👍🏻
Gotta give underrated characters credit man lol
Heeyy I was wonderin if u could do some sfw and possibly nsfw canons 4 T-bone from one piece btw luv ur blog🖤😍👏👌
((This is a character I never thought someone would even ask for but WOW whats it like to have some good fucking taste in men? Bravo.))
SFW
- On dates, will show up to his partner’s house early with a bouquet of their favorite flowers every time. Asks about their day and how they’ve been feeling lately, notices when they’re feeling down and goes out of his way to make their day just a little brighter.
- If he does manage to show up late, he’s far more distraught about it than his date.
- Every day before he leaves for work he gives his partner a kiss on the cheek and tells them how much he loves them. Then he gets on one knee and loudly professes his love for them for everyone to hear in a “brief” 15 minute speech, as to not be late for work.
- When he’s off on distant missions, he’ll call every day and tell them how much he misses them. He has a daily melodramatic struggle of wanting to stay by their side at all times vs. doing his job, but he reaches the same conclusion every day: Continue work diligently to protect them and innocent civilians from pirates. His subordinates love him, but at the same time they’ve gotten sick of the same daily dramatic play.
- Cooks, but measures out every ingredient tediously and doesn’t ever deviate from the cook book.
- Will physically lift his partner off the ground just to carry them over a rain puddle. Takes it too far and just carries them the whole way back home.
NSFW– I’m going to be honest with you all, I just can’t see this man having a NSFW nature so I will give you one headcanon but that is IT:
Keep reading
A head cannon of cracker and katakuri reaction when their s/o slapping their butt every time they walk by them 🍑
YAAAS sweetie XD Also you should checkout @thefreedomisouronlyrule-op‘s ass smacking headcanon for Cracker, they are wonderful:’D
Reaction to you smaking Dat Asseverytime you walk by
Charlotte Cracker
„Hehehe, what’s the matter babe? Did Ihave something on my pants~?
it never fails to suprise Cracker when yousuddenly walk up to him and slap his butt, especially since it’s usually him who’s doingthis to you!
luckily it never hurts and actuallyhas a slightly… arousing effect on him. You can’t keep your handsto yourself, huh? Is he looking that fine again today? Or are yousimply starving for his touch~?
Cracker doesn’t even care if anyoneelse notices lol. You’re his girlfriend, so it’s only his business if youror his hands decide to wander. But if anyone looks at him funny,he’ll just turn to them with the biggest grin on his face and will saysomething like „Yeah you saw that right, it means I’m gonna getsome sugar tonight! Are you that happy for me or why are you staringlike that?“
and naturally, he is totally going topay you back. In public, of course. Or even better, when you’re in a ratherserious or important situation. The sound of him slapping your ass will echo allover the place.
Charlotte Katakuri
„…………………………(Y/N), are you out of your mind? Seriously!“
WHY DIDN’T HE USE HIS FUTURE VISION TOPREVENT THIS FROM HAPPENING. Now this big goof is standing here,unable to move and with the biggest blush on his face, trying to get a hold of what you just did and WHY.
did anyone see? If so, he’d have tosilence them immediately. No one should have witnessed thisembarrassing and life ruining moment ever. He let’s his guard downfor one freaking second, and you don’t even hesitate and go straightfor the ass, in the middle of the streets. Unbelievable.
oh you’re so going to get scolded forthis. He isn’t going to say a single word on your way home since hedoesn’t want to attract any further attention, but once the door isclosed… be ready for what feels like. the longest. talk. of your life.
also from now on, he’ll make sure thathis back will never be exposed to you like that ever again. Katakuri neverthought that the day would come that he’d have to protect his behindfrom his very own girlfriend. Shame on you, your butt slapping hand,AND dirty mind, (Y/N)!
A head cannon of cracker and katakuri reaction when their s/o slapping their butt every time they walk by them 🍑
YAAAS sweetie XD Also you should checkout @thefreedomisouronlyrule-op‘s ass smacking headcanon for Cracker, they are wonderful:’D
Reaction to you smaking Dat Asseverytime you walk by
Charlotte Cracker
„Hehehe, what’s the matter babe? Did Ihave something on my pants~?
it never fails to suprise Cracker when yousuddenly walk up to him and slap his butt, especially since it’s usually him who’s doingthis to you!
luckily it never hurts and actuallyhas a slightly… arousing effect on him. You can’t keep your handsto yourself, huh? Is he looking that fine again today? Or are yousimply starving for his touch~?
Cracker doesn’t even care if anyoneelse notices lol. You’re his girlfriend, so it’s only his business if youror his hands decide to wander. But if anyone looks at him funny,he’ll just turn to them with the biggest grin on his face and will saysomething like „Yeah you saw that right, it means I’m gonna getsome sugar tonight! Are you that happy for me or why are you staringlike that?“
and naturally, he is totally going topay you back. In public, of course. Or even better, when you’re in a ratherserious or important situation. The sound of him slapping your ass will echo allover the place.
Charlotte Katakuri
„…………………………(Y/N), are you out of your mind? Seriously!“
WHY DIDN’T HE USE HIS FUTURE VISION TOPREVENT THIS FROM HAPPENING. Now this big goof is standing here,unable to move and with the biggest blush on his face, trying to get a hold of what you just did and WHY.
did anyone see? If so, he’d have tosilence them immediately. No one should have witnessed thisembarrassing and life ruining moment ever. He let’s his guard downfor one freaking second, and you don’t even hesitate and go straightfor the ass, in the middle of the streets. Unbelievable.
oh you’re so going to get scolded forthis. He isn’t going to say a single word on your way home since hedoesn’t want to attract any further attention, but once the door isclosed… be ready for what feels like. the longest. talk. of your life.
also from now on, he’ll make sure thathis back will never be exposed to you like that ever again. Katakuri neverthought that the day would come that he’d have to protect his behindfrom his very own girlfriend. Shame on you, your butt slapping hand,AND dirty mind, (Y/N)!
Fuck yeah🖤
getting these mtl headcanons outta my system
This is a long ass post but these r some random metalocalypse hcs that I feel kinda strongly abt some r real silly ok here it goes
Aka me projecting
Toki - Enjoys activities like roller skating, weight lifting and boxing (that’s why he’s yknow fucken ripped) - Also enjoys model cars but not nearly as much as his beloved fighter planes - Thick brows - Hair is very thick and smooth (and,,pretty) but he doesn’t put a lot of work into is making the other guys kinda jealous - Sometimes shaves his legs below the knee but that’s it - Does shit like host teen choice awards and guest star on children’s tv shows BUT THEN acts surprised when kids love him,,,tf bitch this is ur fault - Absolutely loves physical affection he fuckin loves hugs and kisses!!!! - Prefers making out and titty groping groupies (and maybe a blowjob) over having sex with them .. but will still do it if he feels like he’s up to it - Kisses with his eyes open (and overall just real fuckin weird ok) - Keeps the video from Juliette sarmangsadandle in his nightstand he treasures it - Mostly writes his own keyboard parts for songs - Band thinks he’s hilarious when he doesn’t try to be but when he tries to tell jokes they don’t work ,, but he’s really funny in Norwegian it’s just the jokes don’t really translate too well so he just,,keeps it to himself - Pickles taught him how to smoke and now they like to chill and smoke together it’s like “their thing” - But he’s really picky about it he only smokes indica - (This is me projecting) Learned the phrase “if u feelin froggy then jump” and never stopped using it
Skwisgaar - shaves e v e r y t h i n g bc of 1) the aesthetics and 2) loves the way it feels - long lovely legs - huge fucken feet - has a klokateer pluck and tweeze his eyebrows them shits be on fleek - cries in secret at least once a day it’s become routine - He kept in touch with his Swedish gf for a while but then fell off and went back to hoeing #hoe4lyfe - Secretly wishes he can go back to wearing all white but he has to maintain brand recognition bc of the band - Wears very slight sweet smelling cologne behind his ears and wherever else cologne goes - Either eats a fuckton or not very much during the day,, keeping his metabolism on her toes - Guitar playing for him is like ultimate stress relief and also he fidgets with it he loves that thing - Has a book of various songs or riffs that he’s written on the guitar that dethklok will never ever use - Wears highlighter - Has run into one of his grown ass children in the bank one time and had to get the fuck out of there immediately,,they didn’t realize it was him tho - Puts his feet on nathan just to bother him - Great teeth / really conscientious about hygiene - Cold hands and oily skin type - He has a pretty good sense of rhythm but ,, he can’t dance he can’t dance for shit oh my god it’s a disaster to look at - “I look like I can’t cook… that’s accurate” - When he drinks wine he does that thing where he swirls it around like a bougie piece of shit - Lactose intolerant :/ - Talks with his hands a l o t it’s over dramatized and very fascinating to watch - Responds to compliments with “I know”
Murderface - closet gay* *gay but he grew up in such a homophobic environment so he tries to ignore it and pretty much force himself to be straight, explaining his constant trouble with women (Bc the attraction isn’t genuine ) and his fragile masculinity (so he’s always a “fellas is it gay to-“ or a “no homo” type of guy ),, his self esteem issues don’t help this out at all - big fuckin crush on skwisgaar (and skwis loves the attention) - sleeps with a retainer - hair is so dry,,,,,,please give this man some conditioner oh my god - knows pretty much everything about the civil war and the American revolution literally ask him anything he’s like a textbook - Somebody come get this man a pedicure - He has a lot of fans and they adore him it’s just that he’s oblivious to it,,, ppl love murderface!! - He’s not as ugly as he thinks he is or that people make him out to be, it’s just that people may think that only Bc the rest of Dethklok is so pretty. He kinda just ends up looking the worst by four-way comparison. It’s just a different type of look he has there’s nothing really wrong with his appearance - Imma go head and say it,,,he uses “y’all” - He and toki have actually made some decent songs for planet piss but it’s usually when they’re jamming out so they pretty much never get recorded 🤷🏽♀️ or remembered - He can move his dick voluntarily I mean I already knew that people with dicks can do this but murderface has like a whole new level of control with his - Got banned from Fintrolls bc he pissed in the olives but he just keeps coming back bc what are they gonna do? nothing - He takes his weapon/torture device collection very seriously like when u walk into his room u better not touch a damn thing or so help me -
Pickles - has nose piercings but doesn’t wear em - Small ear gauges - Strong toned legs especially shins and calves - Has not had a swig of h20 in 6 years but somehow has nice skin (a mystery) - Loathes Seth but absolutely a d o r e s the baby!!! He loves that damn baby and always appreciates when Seth or amber send pics or FaceTime call !! Fuckin uncle pickles!! - Helps toki compose his keyboard parts for songs (Bc he too can play the piano) - Kinda flexible but not as he used to be,,he used to be able to do a full split - Likes to bug Charles a lot bc they’re the closest in age , sometimes they hang they’re good buds - Watches shitty reality tv (bad girls club, LHHATL (it has to Atlanta), etc) as a guilty pleasure - Kind of an asshole but in a way that leaves u wanting more - Played basketball freshman year of highschool,, he was ass at it lmao - Idk how much this has to do with being a headcanon but if pickles was a vine he’d be “I said whoever threw that paper, ya moms a hoe” he just carries that energy - Smells like a light combination of weed and cologne it’s really nice - Will tell one of his band mates to go blow their nose if they’re sniffling too much
Nathan - doesn’t like it when people touch his hair without asking but HOWEVER if u ask before u do he’d probably say yes ,, just gotta warn him first damn - Hates hates h a t e s feet it’s like a weird squirmy phobia. He’s ok with his own feet and just *seeing* other peoples feet but let someone’s bare foot touch him and he’d probably black out tbh - Really socially awkward outside of his stage presence but I think we all knew this - Nathan’s really sweet he just ,, u gotta know him - Really emotional when he’s drunk - Secretly cussing out everyone in his head - He doesn’t completely dislike physical affection but he’s not crazy about it either - Also kisses with his eyes open (but unlike toki he’s trying to work on it) - Dad bod but we all knew this too - Slightly introverted ..he likes to party and shit but can only take that much social interaction for so long then it’s time for him to go home - Eyes are so striking and pretty oh my god it’s like they’re shining it’s all his gfs favorite thing about him - ,,,,,,,thicc - He’s one of those people that rip off their hangnails instead of cutting them 😖 - He can throw down on the grill goddamn why isn’t he in charge of snacks? - Knows how to suture a wound with some level of proficiency - He loves his parents he just hates how they embarrass the fuck out of him god leave me alone mom and dad! - This is ironic to the last thing but remember that video where it was like “son let me hear some of your music” “I don’t think you’d like it” “c’mon let me listen” and the song is just “I hate my dad I hate my dad I hate my dad” the whole time yea that was Nathan in high school - Strong arms (b,,beautiful) - As a kid he used to poke at roadkill for uhh entertainment - Used to be self conscious about his reading glasses but doesn’t gaf anymore - Severe case of resting bitch face he’ll literally be chillin but his face will be mean muggin but that’s just the way he looks - Tried PCP and ended up having to be chained to his bed betcha he’ll never smoke that shit again - likes crime investigation shows and serial killer documentaries - Will n e v e r refuse a fresh hot salted pretzel
Jason, Bubba, Brahms and Michael’s reaction to their S/O tripping over their own feet
Okay so I thought I posted this, but here we go again.
————
Jason
Michael
Brahms
Bubba
Fuck yeah fart canons🤣
Bruce Wayne x Reader - Relationship Headcanons part 1/?
Already did the goodies here : Bruce + Batboys headcanons
As for the rest, here it is. I’m still not sure if I’m doing the “headcanon” thing right…Hope you’ll still like it, especially you anon and you @harlequin-swan :
You can find my masterlist here : @ella-ravenwood-archives
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Lips-
How do they kiss?
It always depends on his mood. It can be rough, or sweet. But it’s always the best kiss ever. Every time you think he can’t out-do himself, and yet, every time it becomes more and more amazing. His lips always taste great, the way he massages your tongue with his is always so loving even when a bit rough…His kisses are just the best. All of his kisses. He’s all for sweet cheeks and forehead kisses. Doesn’t mind much for small PDAs like that, and will kiss your cheeks, forehead, hands in public, to paparazzis’ great pleasure.
What sort of sweet nothings do they whisper?
He would NEVER admit it, but he’s one of the cheesiest person ever. So whispering sweet nothing in your ear ? Definitely. Wether you’re in public (he loves the way your cheek tints of red whenever he whispers something cute), just the two of you cuddling, or making sweet love to each others :
✶ “I can’t imagine my life without you in it.” ✶ “How do you look so beautiful all the time?” ✶ “You brighten up my day every time I see you. Your laugh…” ✶ “You make my sadness disappear with your beautiful smile” ✶ “You’re the reason my life feels so perfect.” ✶ “You make me believe in soul mates.” ✶ “You make me feel weak in the knees when I touch you.” ✶ “Just hearing your voice in the morning makes my day.” ✶ “ I love you so much I can’t explain it even if I tried.” ✶ “You’re the one thing I’m most thankful for having in my life.” ✶ “I want to kiss every inch of you.” ✶ “You make my sadness disappear with your beautiful smile.” ✶ “I could stare at you forever and I’d still feel like I haven’t had enough of you.” ✶ “Spending time with you is the highlight of my day.” ✶ “You could have any guy in the world, and yet you chose me.” (you always thought that one was wrong, that it was the other way around, but he wouldn’t let you say it…oh no) ✶ “I start my day with you on my mind and end my day with you in my dreams.” (one of his cheesiest line)
Yeah you get it, so many things. He makes sure to always give you knew compliments every day, just to see your slight blush and incredible smile. And when he can make you laugh because of his cheesiness or jokes, then it’s even better.
What do they like to talk about ?
With you :
✶ You. You don’t particularly like talking about yourself, but he loves to hear your voice talk about your day, about what you think…It’s soothing to him. Holding you in his arms and you just talking, he loves it. And he always wants to make sure you feel comfortable enough to tell him everything. He hates when you withhold important things from him (if you feel sad, if you have a problem etc etc…). But you guys always say everything to each others. Best friends AND Lovers. ✶ Your children. It’s always an entertaining subject. Always. Chances are, one of them did something that is worth talking about. ✶ Surprisingly, himself. It’s not that he likes to talk about himself, just like you don’t really like to talk about yourself, in fact, it’s more…he likes to tell you how he feels, especially when he’s not alright, because you always have the right words to make him feel better. ✶ The future. Your future to the both of you. ✶ Gossiping with you bring him joy. Oh you two always know everything about what’s up with the League’s members and such. Only nice gossips though, you’d never spread rumors, you only talk between the two of you, because you two already suffer enough from lies from medias and such. Damn rumors. But harmless gossiping about Green Arrow being totally dominated by Black Canary ? Hell yes. ✶ Your and his view of life. It’s always very insightful. ✶ His childhood. Your childhood. It…Helps often. And tiny Bruce was adorable. You were such a daredevil as a child that your stories are also always great. ✶ Naughty things. Oh the way you blush, or the way your words are the only thing that can make him blush…It send shivers down his spine. ✶ Each others’ fears. Because it’s nice to admit he isn’t as emotionless and invincible as everyone seem to think, but he’d admit it only to you.
With his close friends :
✶ You. ✶ His children. he’ll enjoy talking about you and the kids to his friends. About how great you all are. Only close friends, because he can only endure Clark and Diana’s teasing. ✶ Them, he also talks about their interest. It’s his friends, he likes to know about them, even if he won’t admit it, acting as if his interest is only polite, even though he genuinely care. When they need him, he’s here to talk.
With everyone else :
He doesn’t like to talk about himself or actual personal stuffs with others . And as a public figure, as the famous Bruce Wayne, he’ll act as if he likes to talk about his company, about his work, about whatever is in fashion, about politics…but really, he doesn’t enjoy any of those conversations. He mostly just like talking about you and his children (as annoying as he can be), but he doesn’t do it in public. His life is no one’s business.
Can they sing?
No. Oh God he cannot. It’s quite incredible to you really, how great and soothing his voice is when he speaks to you, how much you love listening to him saying whatever…but when he tries to sing it’s just awful. He has no rhythm. He’ll always sing off beat. But you know what ? You fucking love it. (Someone pointed out to me that he actually can sing very well, and I know. I remember him singing for Diana in “The Justice League” animated show (found the youtube video here : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncj-wpBhr5E but…man, I just love the idea of him having such a great deep voice and not being able to sing properly…I guess it’s the point of a headcanon :D)
Legs/Butt-
Are they fast?
For a non-meta human, yes. That guy could have run in the olympics really, with all his training and such. Usain Bolt fast yo. Damn long legs.
How flexible are they?
Bruce isn’t that flexible. He’s all toughness and muscles. Dick is the flexible man in the family, because of his acrobat’s past. Bruce, just like Jason, are more…brute force. Even though they’re master at martial arts, they’re not smooth, they’re not super flexible. They can high kick someone easily, but putting their foot behind their head ? Nope. You however, are very flexible, and he loves it. Useful.
Will they fart in front of an s/o?
Most people would peg it unthinkable to even imagine the always elegant Bruce Wayne farts but…Oh man. With you he knows he can be himself, and if it means farting and burping in front of you sometimes, then he’ll do it. At first, he was so shy about it, and the day you laughed your ass off because you understood he was leaving your bed, leaving the room to go fart elsewhere, he understood that you didn’t care. Farting contest are a thing between the two of you, and the best thing about it ? Only you guys know. You hate it though, when you’re comfortably settled against him, wrapped in the blanket, his arms around you,drawing lazy patterns on your back with his fingers, caressing you all over lovingly…only for him to let out a huge smelly fart, to trap you under the blanket so you HAVE TO smell it and for his arms to tighten around you even more, so that you can’t escape ! Damn bastard !
When you get a random spike of intense pain that fades away after a few seconds
Arthur, quietly coming back to camp in the evening so he doesn’t wake anyone up
Reverend Swanson screaming to him from across camp:
Ik nobody hardly knows this guy but he’s a mysterious character which makes him all the more interesting but could I request some headcanons 4 Micah’s friend Joe btw luv ur blog 😍😜😆
been writing while watching perfect blue, shivers running up and down me. SO GOOD
anyways Joe reminds me of like a fish but I like that he’s kinda beefy. Also I’ve only ever seen like his intro scene in online and read a fic on him so I don’t have a good grasp of him but I’m intrigued.
Joe
Joe’s a hard nut to crack. He’s chronically paranoid and untrusting. It’s the natural result of the life he’s livin’, ain’t nothin’ more than that.
But once you crack that nut? There’s no shaking him. He doesn’t have very many people he can safely say he trusts, much less actually enjoys spending time with. He’ll want you to stick around as much as possible, he’s totally starved for human connection.
And his idea of quality time is very introverted. he likes to just have you around his cabin while he works, you can noodle around and do what you like. He just like being near you.
Joe is also a cuddle monster in denial. He insists he doesn’t need you to dote on him and nuzzle him, but he totally loves it and hugs you to him when he sleeps in the loft with you.
He gets a little separation anxiety if the two of you end up getting really close. Like he doesn’t like you to leave on trips and jobs that are too long. Even though the two of you don’t do so many activities together, he misses your presence very quickly, and he worries about you and when you’re coming back. It’s the paranoia.
He’s no sex freak, he doesn’t tend to instigate it unless he’s feeling particularly emotional, but he enjoys it a great deal when you surprise him and ask for him to take you.
Joe is a big fan of blowjobs in particular. Under the table when he’s writing, in the morning to wake him up, it’s just a fixation of his.
I just went fishing with Kieran in my replay of rdr2 and let me just say it is so HEARTBREAKING to see him gain the confidence to let little pieces of his personality shine through and know what price he ultimately pays
When Arthur says he’s no good at fishing and Kieran says “But I am!” With that grand gesture of the open arms? It’s so full of life. Like if he weren’t in a living nightmare, that would be the real Kieran. In a world with better timing, that could have been the real Kieran.
We all write for the meek and scared Kieran we see trapped at camp, constantly downtrodden and outcasted, but we know that gang was a goddamn family, and the first family he’d had since he was a little boy. Imagine the kind of person Kieran could have become with the same years of love and trust some of the other members got? That Kieran we saw asking Arthur to go fishing could have become his day-to-day self, confident, fun, happy to be alive, a little proud even. I wish I could’ve seen him become that.
