Rowdyveins - Shitpostin' Heartstopper - Tumblr Blog

you ever think about bideo games

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

Apparently everybody could use a little penis in their lives.

I want to be all cute and flirty but then my natural awkward kicks instead of something cute I say something weird and die a little inside and turn bright red and walk away and do you see my problem

IF YOU WANNA BE MY LOVER

YOU GOTTA tell me really explicitely because I can’t tell when people are actually flirting with me

A woman got breast implants made of wood yesterday It would be funny if this joke had a punchline Wooden tit 

artbymoga:

Inspired by every student whose told they can’t be an artist because it doesn’t “make enough money”.

Twenty Dollars  A well known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20 bill. In the room of 200, he asked. “Who would like this $20 bill?” Hands started going up. He said, “I am going to give this $20 to one of you - but first, let me do this.” 

He proceeded to crumple the 20 dollar note up. He then asked. “Who still wants it?” Still the hands were up in the air. "Well," he replied, "what if I do this?" He dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. “Now, who still wants it?” Still the hands went into the air. "My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless; but no matter what happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.  Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who love you. The worth of our lives comes, not in what we do or who we know, but by …WHO WE ARE. You are special - don’t ever forget it.”

so someone once called my old english teacher immature (because at this point he was spinning around on a wheely chair) and he said:

“Yeah, but the truth is we never really grow up. We just masquerade as adults because that’s what we’re expected to do.”

and to this day that is the single most profound thing i have ever heard uttered by someone dicking around on a swivel chair

You’re living, you occupy space, and you have mass.

You know what that means?

I understand the actual sentiment behind those kinds of posts but after seeing them a million times my brain over-analyzes and attempts to actually answer the question.

Reality is a monster living under your bed. They tell it like it is, but they’re not all bad.

Passing through Times Square by Mareen Fischinger

Fun Fact: Thousand Island dressing is not made up of any islands.

I don't understand noses; they don't make any scents.

Do chalk outlines on asphalt count as concrete evidence?

"Wool you love me?" said one sheep to another.

"I only have eyes for ewe."

The other responded, sheepishly.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes. 

When someone calls you "hun"

ROBOTS OR DINOSAURS?

This.