Just Bro Things

just bro things

shouri kondou didn't do whatever the fuck all this is just for people to go and call tetsurou kuroo straight. cut that shit out right now

Scara,,,getting nonconned by bigger men and monsters hehehheheehe

civilian touya who has an awkward relationship with his family. puts the civil in civilian. he got all his angst and rage out of his system during his teenage years, and enji’s been on a self improvement journey for some time now. things should be good now — but he only visits home once every two months (sometimes even less often) and no phone call with him ever lasts any longer than five minutes (unless you’re natsuo. then you get an extra five). and no matter how hard fuyumi or rei attempt to pry on the occasions he does join them at the dinner table, whatever he’s been up to recently is still a mystery for the most part by the time he leaves. touya loves his family, because loving unconditionally is just in his nature. but he spent so much time being angry and pushing them away during his teenage years that he doesn’t really know them anymore — and he can’t bring himself to trust people he doesn’t know.

civilian touya who randomly brings home his hot tattooed gf one day. rei’s eyes are sparkling as she laughs and chats with you, hand resting over your own in that warm motherly way. and the whole time enji’s sat like a fucking statue with an unreadable expression on his face that makes him look constipated. he’s trying so hard not to say oh brother 🙄 so this is what touya’s gotten himself into. he hasn’t gotten to the chapter about conservatism in his self help book. he doesn’t say anything because everyone seems to really like you and touya’s been watching you and his mom talk with a fondness that’s lowkey causing cracks in his stone cold heart. but secretly, he’s betting that this relationship isn’t gonna make it touya’s next visit.

civilian touya who brings you over again…. and again…. and again. enji’s so bewildered and stressed at the fact that he was wrong it’s comical. and he has yet to voice his concerns to anyone else bc he doesn’t want to look like an asshole so he just has this ongoing bet with the voice inside his head that you and touya are going to break up any minute now. everyone else has joined touya in being infatuated with you because you’re great — but also because touya’s now started to visit more often and there’s a constant grin on his face that they haven’t seen since he was a little boy. and enji swears he won’t fall for your little tricks! he’s absolutely livid when a chuckle escapes him at a juvenile joke you made. scandalized by the fact that he’s a little curious about the meaning behind one of your tattoos — you’re not gonna get him to ask 😡

civilian touya who announces that you’re five weeks pregnant a year and a half into your relationship. rei cries. because she’s going to be a grandma, of course, but also because he actually chose to share the news with them instead of suddenly disappearing to some foreign country to raise a family in secret — something she’s convinced the touya before you would have done just to avoid being open with them. and enji, thinks this might just be his aha! moment. having a baby this soon, out of wedlock? bound to fall apart. for once, he hopes he’s wrong.

civilian touya who has one hand stabilizing the smiley, toothless baby girl sitting on his lap and the other holding your left, thumb rubbing the aquamarine gemstone on your ring finger. enji watches his firstborn dote on his own and silently reminisces the first few months of touya’s life. he remembers being full of love for someone for the first time in his entire life, and being terrified; it was all more than he knew what to do with. touya seems to know exactly what to do with it all when he coos at his two girls. love was never a challenge for him — just finding somewhere to place it.

★ a/n: i wrote this with the panel from 388 in mind and that’s the ONLY reason shouto isn’t mentioned. ily bby it’s not what it looks like

The reason Batman doesn’t eat pussy is bc he sucks di-

First thing you see after you zoom in is how you die

How you dying 👀