Shimin Being The Softie When He Had The Highest Body Count Before The Yellow Dragon Came Back Is One

Shimin being the softie when he had the highest body count before the Yellow Dragon came back is one of the reasons I love this book so much 😭

IRON WIDOW CHARACTERS AND THEIR ALLEGIANCE IN THE BARBIE-OPPENHEIMER CONTENTION

Zetian: Oppenheimer

Yizhi: Oppenheimer

Shimin: Barbie

Qieluo: Barbie

Xiuying: Oppenheimer

Zhuge Liang: Oppenheimer

Sima Yi: Went with Zhuge Liang to Oppenheimer but secretly wanted to see Barbie

Taiping (Book 2): Barbie

Wan'er (Book 2): Went with Taiping to Barbie but secretly wanted to see Oppenheimer

Yuhuan (Book 2): Barbie

Di Renjie (Book 2): Oppenheimer

QZ: Watched Oppenheimer and then commissioned the bomb irl

For the past week, "Will you pray for me when I'm gone? / Or is this the eternal dark without a dawn?" and "I'm not a loser!" "WHAT DID YOU SAY!?" have been stuck in my head and I think I'm losing my fucking mind and holy shit I LOVE this scene 😭😭 like wdym when Richie finally felt safe at school, Max came back to take that feeling of security away and then take his LIFE. AFTER TERRORIZING HIM FOR AGES. man i love em both

Richie's death gets worse the longer you think about it. The show opens with Richie running and screaming, implying that he was running through the halls begging for help, never able to find anyone. And we know Max was just toying around with him. In the locker room scene, Max closed off the exits and let Richie be completely, utterly terrified and trapped. He eventually decided to reopen the doors and let Richie run just to give him a false sense of hope before killing him in a frankly gruesome way. He wanted to see Richie running and pleading and begging, and Max was having fun with it the entire time.

The scene is terrifying. Max was written to be terrifying. And Will and Jon pulled SO MUCH weight in both the opening scene and the whole locker room scene and made it all so real.

This is literally saving me rn I'm on bad michie brain rot AUGH THANK YOU SM SM SM

michie ficrecs!

hi!! i saw @24-guy asking for michie fic recs for what to reread and figured i’d just post the fic rec list i made for my friends :-) i’m making my own post because it has some fics written by 24-guy and i’d feel really weird recommending those directly to zem, but i figured someone else might also be interested fjdjfnd

i've split this list into completed fics and ongoing fics for your viewing pleasure, otherwise they're in no particular order :] let me know if there's any mistakes or misattributions, i didn't get anyone to proof read this for me before posting ^^;

enjoy!

COMPLETED:

Max Jagerman's Socks by lab_trash / @lab-trash

"Max's socks start getting interesting, to the point where people actually notice. They don't even look like stuff he'd own, really."

~4k words, 1 chapter, rated T; pure fluff, 5+1 things, a really cute and cozy secret relationship fic

Dangling from the edge by Olive_of_Vanders / @oliveofvanders

"On that fateful day at the Waylon place, a certain weeb saved the bully."

~1.5k words, 1 chapter, rated T; richie saves max's life at the waylon place, plus bonus points for the uncle paul headcanon :] i actually stumbled upon this while trying to remember which fics i’ve been meaning to rec but it's VERY good so i just had to include it

Near Death Panick by lab_trash / @lab-trash

"Max and Richie panic when Max almost dies and they forget they aren't alone."

~2.5k words, 1 chapter, rated G; richie saves max's life at the waylon place, with added secret relationship <3 a delight to read

Hatchetfield's Finest Breadsticks by KairiTheMango / @kairithemang0

"Richie was unsure if he regretted agreeing to be Max's Algebra tutor just yet, however out of the kindness of his heart (and deep down his desire to spend more time with him) he chose to take the job. How hard could it be really? Just a few hours of extra math, it wouldn't hurt anyone."

~1.5k words, 1 chapter, rated G; a short and sweet tutoring fic!!! real neat

class of 2021 by hatchetscandal

"living it, ten years were just that—ten long years. but looking back, ten years is simply the blink of an eye. or the hatchetfield high school class of 2021 is celebrating their ten year reunion, and things have changed drastically in that time."

~4k words, 1 chapter, rated T; cute future class-reunion fic :]

Michie short series - What the fuck happened last night by bonezthewriter

"Richie wakes up in the bed of Max Jagerman one fateful day. Follow them as they develop their relationship; and themselves."

series: ~5.5k words total, 4 works (4 chapters total), no ratings except for the last work (rated T); possible cw for misunderstandings of a somewhat sexual nature, nothing actually happens but they sure do convince themselves it did

Lost and Found by 24_GUY / @24-guy

"A Canon Divergent AU with Michie secret dating and a lot of suffering for Richie. (Less suffering in the sequel, I'm determined to have a happy ending.)"

series: ~21.5k words total, 2 works (18 chapters total), all works rated T; hurt/comfort + secret relationship, THIS ONE IS SO GOOD. it explores richie’s grief at losing max in a really interesting way and then manages to work in a happy ending <3 cw/tw for detailed depictions of the different stages of grief (especially depression)

cause i can’t help it if you look like an angel by pixelprotag / @milgram

"max finds a pretty cool cosplayer online. halloween rolls around, and it turns out he goes to his school."

~1.5k words, 1 chapter, rated T; a really cute fic surrounding the idea of richie doing cosplay, plus another win for "paul is richie's uncle" truthers :P

Paul Matthews and his many children by ThatStar_Guy

"Paul acquires his first adopted son when his sister kicks out his nephew, Richie, because of his sexuality. Richie goes to Paul for help, and he and Emma are glad to provide it. He acquires his second adopted son when Tom perishes in an explosion. Tim, having no other family, comes to live with them. He acquires his first unofficial son when Pete starts spending every day at his house. He acquires his first unofficial daughter when Ruth also spends every minute at his house. He acquires his second unofficial daughter when Grace starts dating Ruth. He acquires his first blood daughter with Emma when they are 32. He acquires his first son in law when Richie marries Max at 20. He acquires his first unofficial daughter in law when Pete marries Steph at 22. He acquires his first grandchild when Richie and Max adopt at 24. He acquires his first and second unofficial grandkids when Pete and Steph are 25."

~3k words, 1 chapter, rated G; a "paul is richie’s uncle” fic taken to the extreme in the absolute BEST way possible. mostly paul centric and focused on paul/emma, with background richie/max, grace/ruth, and pete/steph as far as ships go. THIS ONE IS OF MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITES!!! lots of Black Friday references

r/TrueOffMyChest by lab_trash / @lab-trash

"I (21m) am in love with my roommate and former bully victim (20m)"

~3k words, 1 chapter, rated G; future fic, in-universe reddit post format. this ones clever and addresses just how shitty Max was in highschool

Maybe We Can Find A Home Here by 24_GUY / @24-guy

"Max confides in Ruth once, and gets a family out of it."

~3k words, 1 chapter, rated T; a really cute ruth and max friendship fic. words cannot express how much i adore it :3

UNFINISHED:

Won't you pray for me? by Whowillprayforyou / @whowillprayforyou

"Max Jägerman is as straight as a board, as per the norm with being who he is. King of the school, Star quarterback. He's got one weakness, Repressed nerds, and thankfully Grace chasity isn't letting up any time soon. Imagine his surprise when his focus shifts to a different not so repressed nerd, after a life changing event. Even more shocking, said nerd is Richard Lipschitz."

~17k words, 5 chapters, no rating as of posting; richie saves max’s life at the waylon house, slow burn ensues <3 i'm literally obsessed with this one

Zeek: The Fighting Nighthawk by lab_trash / @lab-trash

"Max strikes up conversation with their school mascot without knowing who's under the costume. Richie just goes with it, even through that massive anxiety… which fades so quickly for some reason. He learns so much about Max, and he'd never seen him so relaxed before. It's not so bad."

~9k words, 4 chapters, rated T as of posting; secret identity shenaniganery >:] I LOVE THIS ONE SO MUCH. it's probably one of my favorite npmd fics. plus, this one has the “trevor is richie’s twin” headcanon in a really prominent way which the author executes really well

Car Lights by 24_GUY / @24-guy

"When Richie takes Amanda - his best friend's daughter and his goddaughter - to the grocery store to fill their day, he least expects to run into Max Jägerman of all people."

~36k words, 18 chapters, rated T as of posting; future fic with background steph/pete and some really sweet ruth and max friendship moments :3 I FUCKING ADORE THIS ONE!!! another great twin headcanon piece as well. it should be noted that i've been a dancer for 15 years and this is somewhat of a dancer au, so i may be biased

Beanies by lab_trash / @lab-trash

"As soon as Max turned 16, his father began berating him to get a job so he could pay rent for his room. Actually, that’s a lie. It started a couple weeks before he turned 16. To “give him time.” He actually expected Max to have a job as soon as he was 16. It wasn’t so bad at first, since he didn’t have school and he could manage his part-time job and whatever sport practice he had going on at that time. But once the school year started… Max was always a bully. But in his junior year, he became a literal monster. OR: Max works at Beanies and accidentally sort of makes friends with a regular customer who just happens to be a nerd."

~16k words, 9 chapters, rated G as of posting; paul is richies uncle and theres a background focus on paul/emma. probably my all time favorite michie fic— lotta well thought out references to the other musicals. i've been rereading at least part of it every day for the last couple days, its just that good

thanks for reading!!

feel free to drop into my ask box to talk about any of these or just hatchetfield stuff in general ^w^ have a lovely day/night

EATS THIS LIKE IM A STARVING VICTORIAN CHILD AND THIS IS A MEAL WORTHY OF THE QUEEN

a lil headcanon about the end of NPMD (spoilers ahead, obvs)

i was thinking about NPMD this morning (as you do) and i realized something.

by the end of NPMD, when max's soul is taken by the lords? who do you think is going to torture him the most?

tinky.

let me explain.

who was tinky watching like a hawk during "the summoning"? pete. another spankoffski. another prize for his toybox. he could hardly keep his hands off him. you could see that he wanted to lunge at pete and grab him right away. he probably even got a bit mad when wiggly stroked the boy's face.

but it was okay. because this would be perfect! he'd have a Petey all of his own! and then he could torture the brothers together and they can watch each other suffer which will make them BOTH suffer more-

but then. BUT THEN.

max stopped steph from shooting pete. and either max moves at super ghostly speed or some magic imbued in his undead form from the waylon place gave him time-slowing powers. but either way, he stopped that bullet.

pete was going to die. and he wasn't going to heaven or hell. he was going to be taken to the Black, where he would definitely be tinky's new favorite toy.

so how dare this shitty zombie jock use this ripoff version of his time-controlling powers. and ESPECIALLY how dare he use them to keep pete from getting shot and his soul falling straight into tinky's terrifying grasp?

then he has to watch grace and max have sex, which is absolutely fucking disgusting. he was already seething, but now he knows that he's not going to get a good toy out of this deal. he's getting this stupid shitty kid that no one liked.

and he's not a spankoffski.

so when the lords do take his soul, when max is pulled into the Black, of course wiggly is gleeful about this. all of them are. oh, how they'll enjoy torturing him for all eternity, exposing him to unimaginable horrors and unspeakable evils. what a fun new toy!

but they decide that their furious bastard of a brother should get first dibs. after all, they knew tinky was really looking forward to having a Petey. and it's the only thing they can think of to calm him down, because "rage" doesn't even begin to describe how tinky's feeling right now.

besides, now that they have grace as their fun little soulsnatcher, they'll have plenty of other toys to play with.

so they gladly hand max over to tinky.

max thought he knew what fear was. skele'ns, ghosts, people forgetting about him, his (probably abusive) father.

no.

this is going to be way worse.

he sees tinky's horrific, goat-like grin, feels his crackling, angry energy radiating in the Black and surrounding him.

tinky's voice is low, a deep growl that shakes max's bones. he wears a smile that is anything but happy.

"you're going in the box now, maxie-poo. i hope you have..."

"... a great time." 💛