You Know, I Wasnt Really Feeling The Old Guard For Everything It Was Hyped Up To Be. And Then I Saw THESE

You know, I wasn’t really feeling the old guard for everything it was hyped up to be. And then I saw THESE TWO IN THIS SCENE

And well...promptly died and fell in love with these two immortal gays.

*i admit, tho the poem was *chefs kiss* I was waiting for joe to just go He’S mY HuSBaNd BiTcH

Merlin IS Magic. Surely this makes him more than a little different?

I have this Headcannon that because of all his various powers, Merlin is physically quite different to what is usually expected in medical science and Gaius is completely fascinated by absolutely hates it.

I’m talking things like one day he comes stumbling into their chambers with an arrow clean through the left side of his chest, wheezing but somehow Not Dead. It’s because like his dragon kin, Merlin’s heart is on the right side of his body. Gaius swears off everything Merlin related there and then. (He lasts about 30 minutes).

Or how under the concealment charm tied to his neckerchief, Merlin’s eyes are naturaly a blazing gold all the time, fuelled by the magic in his veins. Surprisingly, they also allow him to see quite well in the dark. ‘Like a cat’ Gaius remarks when he finds out about it.

His teeth are a little too pointy? Or at least his canines are. It’s Merlin’s most obvious ‘Medical Mystery’ trait but fortunately nothing that can’t be explained away easily enough. It does however add another point to the creature side of ‘Human vs Magical Being’ tally Gaius has been keeping in his head. For scientific purposes. Of course.

Merlin’s speed and agility are much greater than it has any right to be, even if you take into account the amount of physical labour he does for Arthur; The boy practically flys over the ground. Unfortunately the knights don’t realise this until they bet all their money he couldn’t beat Gwaine in a race.

He can talk to animals too! Mind-speak is easiest but his other method has Gaius tearing out the little hair he has left because his ward Should Not Be Able To Do That. To talk to animals, Merlin simply replicates THEIR language: be that neighing, breying or barking. Laws of Vocal Chords be damned, Merlin can do it.

To top it all off, the Knights aren’t wrong when they banter with Merlin about how little he weighs. Gaius is just glad it shields the boy from anyone thinking too hard about the definitely unnatural fact HE could even lift Merlin with one hand if he so pleased. They’re not sure if it’s an Emrys thing, a hollow-boned dragon thing or if there’s some pixie blood mixed in there but Merlin is secretly quite pleased when his creeping footsteps make much less sound than anyone else’s.

Gaius dreads the day he has to treat Merlin for an illness which isn’t immediately obvious because Dear Albion it could be ANYTHING.

BONUS: for anyone with magic, Merlin can be spotted from a mile away because he literally LEAKS it. Again, Gaius says this is Not Normal and no magic should be coming out of him if he’s not actively wanting it too but the druids spot his unique trait a mile away and it puts other magic users at ease when they’re around him. It’s like a giant warm blanket.

Where are the stories of Remus Lupin being fucking grumpy not because of the moon or the mauraders, but because of the amount of girls who have decided silver jewellery is in this year.

My poor man is dodging girls left right and centre. It’s gotten to the point he’s seriously considering investing in one of those giant muggle hamster balls.

Everyone freaking out over the Agnatha harkness song I’m sorry it sounds like something the Oompa Loompas would sing

The endless cycle of complaining you’ve run out of fics to read, devouring the new 10-20k at the top of the date updated page and going back to complaining how you’ve run out of fics to read.

Give me Alex Rider’s politics teacher just being absolutely...astounded by the amount of knowledge this kid has on not only the socio-economic climate of literally every freaking country but the most freakishly good instincts of how each new politician that comes along is going to fare. It’s at the point he now has a secret cabinet of sticky notes on Alex’s off hand comments of each new public figure because God Dammit he always turns out to be right.

Give me Alex’s Riders politics teacher who stands up for him against others in the staff room because his essays provide the freshest viewpoints he’s seen in over 20 years. Ethics, politics, morality, social structures, negotiations, public figures, military influences and ulterior motivators; Alex Rider handles each topic with a grace and insight he hasn’t seen since university. Quite frankly he doesn’t know whether to be impressed or terrified. He settles on curious.

Give me Alex Rider’s politics teacher who’s family served in the army, who recognises the shadows of war in those dark brown eyes even if he can never understand why. The only one that seems to notice that seeing Alex’s controlled, efficient steps through a boisterous crowd of school children is like watching a ballet dancer glide through a swarm of drunk seagulls.

Give me Alex Rider’s politics teacher who let’s the poor kid take a nap in class or snack when he wants to (partly because 50% of the time he looks ready to drop) but mostly because deep down they both know there’s nothing that he can teach him here. Alex had an already pretty unusual and impressive grasp of foreign affairs before his uncle died and in the years since then? Well, he’s pretty sure Alex speaks more languages fluently than he has fingers.

Give me Alex Rider’s politics teacher whose subject gives him more of a glimpse into his talents than most people are allowed to see; who takes one good look at his extra little piece of the puzzle and thinks yeah. This kid is brilliant.