zukishaylupo - OCKin MHA/BNHA
OCKin MHA/BNHA

Look at my pinned post | 19 years old in this life/body

64 posts

Random, But Can Any Systems/plural Beings Talk About How They Figured Out That They Are Plural?

Random, but can any systems/plural beings talk about how they figured out that they are plural?

DID, OSDD, endo, etc. Any version of systems or plurals

I have questioned DID or something similar to just myself and 1 or 2 friends irl before. I'm unsure if my trauma was "enough" or happened at "the right time" or whatever to be able to cause a dissociative disorder.

If anyone has any websites or similar things to suggest to help me, pls send me them.

I mostly try and stay out of plural/system things cause once again I am unsure if I am one in any way. And to go into a community that I am not sure I am in feels off.

Using I/me/my/etc. sometimes feels wrong, and we/us/our/etc. feel right even if just referring to "me." But sometimes I/me/my/etc. feels fine/right, so idk.

Please give me advice or at least share your experiences if you're able/willing to. Thanks

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/hx) [if I find out I'm a system/plural in some way, this sign off thing will probably be changed around].

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More Posts from Zukishaylupo

8 months ago

I'm a bit bored, I should probably work on English class work, but my brain says no, and I have no real control, lol.

Anyways, fictionkin shit, this is gonna be talking about my biological parents as Zuki, so there will be trigger warnings. All of this is just to do with my life as Zuki, I have problems with my parents here, but not as bad.

Tw: hinted at sexual assult not said by name but still, physical abuse, emotional abuse, verbal abuse, child abuse, bullying, scars, burning/fire, and maybe more? Idk if there's anything to add, let me know.

My bio father as Zuki was a horrible abusive asshole. He was not the first guy to get my bio mother pregnant [as my old sibling is my half-sibling from my mom]. He told my mother that if she just had one kid with him, then he would be "happy" (not his actual words but whatever). So I was the kid that came from this "agreement".

But when I actually got the first part[s] of my quirk at the age of 4, which included wings (which came from my sib's bio father pretty much, it's hard to explain exactly), he was fucking pissed but couldn't do anything cause my mother did what he wanted, she had one kid with him (just not the kid he wanted).

At the age of 7, the other part of my quirk came in. Which is/was essentially the ability to "drop" my body and become a "spirit," I guess you could say. It freaked people out, causing a lot of bullying and shit. Anyways, that just made my bio father [I hate calling him that, but whatever] hate me more.

He was always "aggressive" and abusive, I mean, he didn't get physical to me until I was around 5 or so. I also couldn't actually speak until I was at least 7, and then it was about at a like 2 year old level, basically. Anyways, he got physically abusive towards me when I was like 5, but he was always verbally and emotionally abusive towards me.

When I was like 11, my bio father got put into jail cause my old sib got into UA and told Aizawa about him and shit. I was happy that I was "free" from abuse [I wasn't really, but I was at least free from him].

My bio mother had an alcohol problem and would drink a whole lot. She wasn't really ever physically abusive when I was younger. But after my bio father got put in jail, it actually seemed to get worse with her towards me. Idk why exactly, but I believe it had to do with me kinda looking like my bio father and also my bio mother (she definitely had problems with self image and took it out on me).

My old sib didn't see the abusive side of our mother at all. They were the favorite child, they didn't look as much like our mother, I guess. They had seen only the loving side of our mother, which I knew existed but rarely saw when I was alone with her.

I always had a hard time admitting that my mother was abusive and shit. To me, it was deserved cause I was an unwanted pup that she was forced to have and care for. She still wasn't typically physically abusive.

When I was like 12 or 13, my bio mother left me alone in the house. She had slapped me to the ground before fully leaving as I was quietly "screaming" for her to not leave me. My older sib never knew this. As far as they knew, our mother was just really busy with hero work [I forgot to mention that both of my bio parents were heroes]. The only time our mother would be at the house is if I had called or texted her about my old sibling wanting to see her and shit. Then she would come home and act like everything was fine and that she still lived there and took care of me.

That went on until I was like 15, it was my second year in high school [another reminder that UA is a college and I was 18 in my canon]. My bio mother had been in a bad villain attack and was at the hospital and would never do hero work again and would have to be in the hospital for a while (years). After that happened, my old sib ended up becoming my legal guardian and shit.

My old sib was pretty busy with hero work since they were pretty much just starting out with their hero career. They asked Izuku's mom [Auntie Inko as I called her] to look out for me a lot, as she already was, and because me and Izuku were childhood friends who were re-becoming friends again.

Pretty sure if Auntie Inko had the full ability to support another child legally and shit, she would've adopted me. I was not an easy pup to deal with, though. I was very suspicious of her kindness and would fight her [I bit her a few times cause of being fearful and shit, I really regret that and shit]. I was sure that she would abandon me as well one day, of course this never happened [think of the moment in the movie Bolt where Mittens is talking about how "Penny is fake" that was kind of how I was with Izuku and his mom at first].

Anyways, Auntie Inko ended up basically being my parent until I got adopted by Dadzawa and Papamic.

I'm gonna go into a bit more detail, but not too much detail about my bio father's abuse now.

His quirk gave him wolf claws [not necessarily always out, but he kept them out almost all the time] that were able to use some of the elements (fire, water, etc. I guess) to hurt. It's kinda hard to explain rn, but basically, he could have his claws on fire [I use that example cause it was his favorite].

He would use his "fire claws" on me a lot when he wanted to hurt me. He burned me a lot with them, I had so many scars from him doing this a lot. I had one scar across my face that I got from one of those times that I hid with makeup for a long time. Eventually, I gave up hiding it, and when my friends asked about it, I would say it was old, and I just used to cover it up.

His abuse in this way made me very cautious around fire and shit [so yes I was very cautious and scared when Todoroki first started using his fire but I of course never said anything cause I was not about to discourage his use of his fire]. Fur and feathers don't really go with fire anyway, so yeah.

Idk if there's anything else I want to say but at least for right now, this is good. Sorry for 2 vent(?) posts back to back.

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/hx/it)


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8 months ago

These messages really do get a lot longer than expected, lol.

I could go into more detail about a lot of things, but then we'd probably be at this like all day, lol. While that'd be fun, it's probably better to not do that, lol.

Just want to say that you're really cool! And it's really great talking with you! I don't really have many people to talk to about all this, so it's really nice being able to ramble about memories with someone!

I just realized that I typed Shoto with the u, which he didn't have in my canon, lol. So ignore the u, I'm too lazy to go and change it, lol.

I'm glad that you told Toga Himiko that her quirk doesn't make her evil. I remember that when I first met her after the training camp [I wasn't really involved in that fight anyways], I told her that I had been called tons of names and shit because of my quirk.

I was called "Monster" "Freak" "Evil" etc.

But the one that really 'stuck' was being told that "Not even a villain would want your quirk." So, uh yeah, that sucks. They were basically saying that my quirk was so useless and bad that no one would ever want it. It's what made it easier for me to see people with "evil" or "villain" or "useless" or whatever other word people said quirks as good and deserving of love and worth so much. Quirks are really just a tool in a way. It's how someone uses it that makes the person. Quirkless people are also worth so much, and I wish that people had seen that more.

I remember giving Toga some of my blood on that day that I actually met her [this happened before I was adopted. It was like right after the dorms were made] and saying something like, "I won't let someone starve if I could help them." Cause at least in my canon, she needed to drink blood to live, so yeah. Quirk diets or whatever you wanna call them suck [I had to eat more meat and sometimes needed to eat what would essentially be raw meat, it was slightly cooked but not quite rare, but it wasn't fully raw, idk. I just know it sucked cause of being scared of how people would see me.].

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/hx)

Hello, I decided to come say hi and shit in an ask, lol.

I'm not good at starting conversations, but I would like to hear about any alterhuman or nonhuman experiences or memories or anything that'd you'd be willing to share!

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it) | a fellow noncanon MHA being/creature :3c

aaa hihi!! good to hear from you, i definitely feel you on the 'bad at starting conversations' lol!

the first thing that comes to mind a memory of playing video games with Tomura and Shuichi. I wasn't very good at it, but it was good bonding and i loved playing with them. I would only play the 'silly' games like Mario Kart or Smash Bros, they got too into the 'serious' ones for me. I finished in last place every time lmao, so i mostly spent my time teasing whoever was in second place. Dabi would sit with us too sometimes, either lazily scrolling on his phone or bothering the three of us, trying to help whoever would give him the most attention lol. The others joined in sometimes too, Himiko and Jin and rarely Sho and Toshi if they were hanging out. Himiko would shriek excitedly and bump us while Jin cheered her on and cursed her out. It was good.

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to ramble lol!! Feel free to share any memories/thoughts you have :D


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8 months ago

Update that's probably long overdue. The memorial/funeral already happened. There were a lot of people there, so at least I know my cousin was loved and did love a lot.

Shit still sucks, I have recently dropped or been dropped from all but one class [I had three], so that's great [/sarcastic]. I am really starting to wondering if college is right for me, I will definitely be taking at least one term off and if I go back to college it will probably be a different one so I can pretty much have a fresh start. I luckily don't need a college degree to do what I want to do, which is to become a dog trainer specializing in service dogs.

I also need to try and work on getting myself a service dog, which I believe I mentioned a while ago. Motivation is so hard to find to do shit so I can actually live a somewhat "normal" life.

Sorry about the rant, life just kinda sucks rn. But there's also good shit. This is just about the bad shit rn.

Something good is I'll be going to see that side of my family again soon for a barbecue [is that spelled right? I have a specific learning disability (what it is listed as on my paperwork, lol)] so that'll be fun.

I'll actually be able to talk to my queer cousin about shit again, lol. My father and brother in this life are homophobic and transphobic and shit so that's not fun, but I do have an old cousin who is queer that I love hanging out with and wish I could hang out with more. As well as my younger cousin [who was the son of my cousin who died], he's cool to hang out with as well, lol.

My older cousin streams, but I don't know if I should say their username or not. I'll not say it for now at least.

Hope ya'll are having good days and shit! :3c

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it mainly)

Edit: I forgot tags

[TW: Death and shit that comes with that, idk maybe more? If you find any more things that should be in this trigger warning pls tell me.]

Also, shit is happening in my life rn. I recently [on September 11th] lost my cousin, she died and we aren't sure how exactly yet. So, yeah. Death is fucking weird and I don't think I process it normally (AuDHD). So I may end up not posting for a while or might end up posting like every day.

Just sharing so ya'll know what's going on if I disappear for a while [even though I would likely do that even without this shit happening].

We aren't sure when the funeral thing is happening yet, I slightly hope it's soon so I can see my family, I don't live by that side of the family, sadly. Probably gonna end up missing like a day of college, but whatever, my family [my pack] is more important to me.

My cousin left behind a son. He is a kid. He's younger than I was when my mom in this life died. [I was like 16 when that happened, and I won't be sharing how old my 2nd cousin is]. So I really wanna see that side of my family, so I can try and be there for him. He's gonna need people there for him, and if I could without getting in trouble, I would drop out of college rn to be around him while he is going through this. (Protective wolf/dog instincts?)

There's just a lot of shit going on rn with my life, I wish it would stop for a bit.

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/xe/ze) :((

[We is referring to my family, btw]


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9 months ago
Made Some Pins/buttons At My College's "Maker Space" As They Call It, Lol.
Made Some Pins/buttons At My College's "Maker Space" As They Call It, Lol.

Made some pins/buttons at my college's "Maker Space" as they call it, lol.

Ignore how bad they look, I had to draw the designs by paw, lol [I am refusing to say hand].

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/he/hx) :3c

{He/him and hx/hxm pronouns are equal to which I prefer, lol}

[I also almost put my actual preferred name instead of Zuki, lol]


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9 months ago

What's an OCkin?

Hello! Thanks for the ask!

So, an OCkin is a type of fictionkin [someone who identifies partly or fully as a fictional character] for OCs, which are original characters.

For me, I have only OCkin types when it comes to fictionkin types. My blog is based around one of said kin types (I kinda hate saying it like this, but it's the "correct" way of saying it and makes it easier to understand), Zuki, who is a My Hero Academia OC that I made before realizing that I am Zuki.

In my case, this identity [and most of my other alterhuman/nonhuman identities] comes from a past life. Not everyone's does, though, and no matter what someone's identity comes from, it's valid [whether their identity is psychological, spiritual, physical, or if there's any other types they are valid].

This has kind of gone on a slightly similar but also different tangent, lol. If anyone else has anything to add to my post here, feel free! Also, I hope this makes sense to you!

- Zuki Shay Lupo [They/xe] :3c


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