11 P.M. Thoughts - Tumblr Posts

My Brother!

He's trying to convince me that you if you take a wheel of cheese, dress it up with decorations and frosting, and it'll be cheese cake(cause as he says cake has four qualifications, round, dairy, frosting, decoration)

He's also saying that if add enough melted cheese to shells and cheese, it'll be a soup(it's a pasta??)

I don't get this guy

Sometimes people think they're being helpful when they really aren't

I get it hurts me

I get it physically damaged me

I get in twenty years I will regret it

But if I don't have it, I might not even make it another twenty years

You would all not believe how hard I'm resisting the urge to share this incomplete drawings

I must wait till it's either finished or I get bored

At the same time

I reallyy wanna show it to people

Showing the incomplete updates to Jo to avoid caving and posting them

YES!

You put me in a room full of autistic people and I'll feel like I'm the wrong kind of autistic and don't fit in

I hate it

Cause on the one hand, literally all diagnosed with the same neurodevelopmental disorder

On the other I'm high functioning enough that I don't even really compare to my autistic brother and often have major doubts over my identity and my diagnosis

do you guys ever feel like an outcast even in a group full of outcasts. like i'm autistic and even in groups full of neurodivergent people i'm still excluded sometimes. i don't understand why

I know it's like freaking May but let's talk Christmas and even more importantly let's talk Lemon Demon

Why is "I Am Become Christmas" the best Christmas album(or lp or ep or whatever)? Cause it has everything a Christmas album should have

-Spook

-Pagan traditions

-The apocalypse

-Seasonal depression

-Body horror

Plus you can listen to this all year round

Turns out I'm staying up late to see the northern lights, so let's make another post about Lemon Demon for the heck of it

Recently I saw a post defending artists commonly seen as dumb tiktok cringe shit. Fair point, this music isn't that bad. But it still came from the standpoint of Lemon Demon being something from tiktok, which just isn't correct

Neil Cicierega has been makin music for the internet for as bout as long as people have done that. He's got four albums under his own name. Seven albums and five ep's under Lemon Demon. And more music released pre Lemon Demon under the name Trapezoid. He's the inventor of animutation. He created The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny, Harry Potter Puppet Palls, Brodyquest, Ariel Needs Legs, and songs for Gravity Falls. He's also an armature filmmaker and lead member of Guaranteed video*

He's not something from tiktok just cause tiktok discovered Fine and decided it sounded "better" sped up

Mini sleep deprived rant over

The sad realizations that:

One, not all your mutuals have the same opinions as you

Two, a lot of people on the earth have extreme opinions

And three, your mutual is openly sexist to your gender and just didn't know who you were when they followed you

Is very sad

My brother is running a new quest idea, so I came up with a character idea, which is rather angrily shut down

Considering all the stuff I put up with his character doing I think that's dumb, especially as this idea I have isn't that bad, but whatever. He's the DM, he gets final say, even if final say is shutting down the most creative thing I've ever thought of that the rest of our family agrees is great and in no way broken

That said, this is still one of the most creative things I've ever thought of. And incredibly funny too. So I'm now trying to think up a story too write just so I can do something with this idea

I don't get why dentist are mean

I get why doctors are mean, even though it's in no way okay

But you're a dentist

Stop being a jerk

I get it, I failed at the easiest chore ever

For me, August was and will always be the odd one. Where the season changes and the air is not so humid or hot. Like half cold tea or stepping inside after one day being out and about.

August is where I never mind about how many days until weekend or how many days until it ends. August is where I never count, because if I do, then I grow up faster.

For me living through August is both scary and exciting. In a way little kids knows her birthday is coming around the corner, but also the 20th, 21st, 22nd birthday and the number is the scary part.

For now, August is where I lay down and count my blessings before another year passed and I'm forced to be something that I'm not ready to be, someone that I'm not used to be.