Dad Joke - Tumblr Posts

I’m a bisexual ENTP with ADHD that never runs out of dad jokes, what’s your superpower?

The best dad joke in film history. [via]

Trying to Explain my Sexuality to my Dad

Me: Okay, so I would identify as bisexual.

Dad: And that means you would have a male partner.

Me: Yep.

Dad: Or a female partner.

Me: Yep.

Dad: And that means you're bi.

Me: Yep.

Dad: So that means if you don't find a partner you're on standbi?

Me:

Me:

Me:

Me: Did you just

why the fuck is tumblr suddenly obsessed w dad jokes im so confused

DON' T GIVE HIM IDEAS, FOR GODS'S SAKES !!!!!

Circe: Do you think he... knows it?

Ody: As much of a pain in the ass he is, I like my body without contorting in brutal ways, thank you....

Circe: but it can be possible do...

Ody: SHuT UP and close the windows, if HE Hears you i a..

Poseidon: Hi! Friend....

Ody' body:

Poseidon: now you're NOBODY!

??????

I was showing some of my pics and there was this group selfie and he was like wow y'all had a selfie stick? I was like no, my friends have long arms and without missing a beat he said they should try law then

Adding tags to your posts helps people find them

helps people find....the dads?

everyone should be allowed to fight their dad at least once

Why do companies make a big deal out of shrinkage when they are downsizing all the time?

My dog can become another animal. It's true! Sometimes she barks until she's a little hoarse.

I'm manifesting. So hard right now.

I was reminded of the best joke my Dad ever told me (it's a little dirty.) He does get me from time to time. I was maybe 14-16, sarcastically claiming to be a new prophet given unto the world for silly little things. And my Dad, an avid Spock fan, cocked his eyebrow (I believe he must have practiced this many times in the mirror in college.) He had a joke loaded, it was going to tear itself from his mind and fly free into the world.

And he looks me in the eye. (The younger of his two offspring.) And says "You know technically you are the second cumming."

I was floored. It was perfection. I never knew my dad could do that. I fell down laughing, I still chuckle to myself when I remember it.

I have never let him escape this joke. It makes me giggle so often. He goes red when I bring it up; when I tell it to others. But he made art. And art must be shown.

Have a fantastic day!

Ben

[10.6.2024 1:18am Edit - Added the S to "Malow" as per my Mother's request. I do not know where that S had gotten to before. Yes I did show my mother this post. Yes my parents are divorced. Yes I am cute.]

How do you kill a drow? You drow them.

This our go to joke since a drow failed his resistance check to siren song in a fantasy pirate OS.

excuse me

I love this! Looks like a dad joke, vibes like a dad joke!

Traffic must be very Conjested.