Drunken - Tumblr Posts
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Drunken Bad Luck Mother Fucker Goblin . #illustration #drawing #art #tshirt #print #digitalart #desenho #dibujo #photoshop #goblin #motherfucker #luck #bad #drunken #900 #hellwill
Why I'm happy for screwing up
So excuse me for any and all nonsense in this post. Â I just returned from the bar and I am insanely drunk out of my mind. Â Where do I even begin with this one... okay...
So let's start with tonight. Â I met Mr. D tonight for the second time. Â We re-introduced ourselves and had a small conversation. Â Mr. D is an insanely attractive fellow and teaches at a high school in Metro Denver. Â He could easily model with boyish good looks, fashionable hair and excellent clothing taste that reveals his muscular frame, and he showed up at the bar I frequent with his boyfriend tonight.
We started talking long before I moved to Colorado. Â We were both members of a gay site and his profile has stated that he played cornerback for a D1 football team in the South. Â I also thought that he was really good looking, but when we talked (and he did respond), he seemed to convey strong disinterest in talking to me, so I let bygones be bygones and respected his wishes.
Fast forward to last pride. Â My buddy and I were at a diner post-bar close, when a handsome man and I were talking in line. Â It had been awhile at that point since I even had been online, but we started talking about movies. Â After, we got our respected tables. Â He comes over to me at the end of the night and gives me his number the old fashioned way and tells me that he thinks I'm hot. Â We text briefly, and then suddenly stop for reasons I don't remember why.
After the basic backstory is all said and done and I reconnect with him, I learn a few things:
1) Sometimes age is important when it comes to dating. Â Since he is in his 30s and I'm only 22, we are clearly in different parts of our lives. Â I'm currently in the closet to most of my family (especially since the parts of my family who live close to my grandma is tight knit and my cousin is a Calvinist Minister with some books published) and haven't established a career or a plan to come out and eventually hopefully settle down and establish a family.
2) Sometimes you have to learn to let go. Â Mr. D. is a really good-looking guy, and as I have said before, he could easily/have easily modeled (especially during his college football playing days) and he has some wisdom and leadership, as that comes with being established in the teaching profession for a number of years. Â I think he's out, but like I have said, I have no idea how to even start to come out and unwind some of the lies I started telling my family.
3) Confidence booster: holy shit I can actually snag a guy like that.
So, tumblr, I'm laughing at myself right now, as well as kicking myself. Â Overall, it's kind of a catharsis that I need to learn for now and adjust for life, but I figured I'd just share it publicly on the net for anybody who is willing to listen. Â I'm open to constructive criticism about it, but that's just my drunken ramblings for the night. Â I hope you can take some bona fide wisom out of this drunken rant.
Cheers,
Z Man
Oh, shit! The homoeroticism is unbearable