Lessons - Tumblr Posts
Thank you for all these contributions!
Want to learn something new in 2022??
Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)
40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)
Excellent basic crochet video series
Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)
Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)
How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)
Another drawing character faces video
Literally my favorite art pose hack
Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??
Introduction to flying small aircrafts
French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding
Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)
Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)
Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)
Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:
Calculus 1 (full semester class)
Learn basic statistics (free textbook)
Introduction to college physics (free textbook)
Introduction to accounting (free textbook)
Learn a language:
Ancient Greek
Latin
Spanish
German
Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)
French
Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)
Eclectic Witch
An individual approach that picks and chooses from many different traditions and creates a personalised form of witchcraft that meets their individual needs and abilities. Their minds remain open and are receptive to knowledge, ideas, beliefs and methods that others practice. They adapt well to different situations and create their own paths by what they believe to be true and right at that time in their life.
More like this
Advice for Learning the Meanings of the Tarot Cards
I’ve been a tarot enthusiast for many years. I even did readings for myself, sporadically, for a little while, but I always had to use a reference book for the meanings of the cards. This means that my readings weren’t ever very helpful, because I never memorized the cards and therefore I never developed a relationship with the cards. It’s kind of like only being able to dance when you have pre-painted footsteps on the floor onto which you must be careful to place your own feet. You never learn to feel the music if that’s how you’re dancing.
Several factors interfered with my learning the card meanings, one of which is the sheer number of meanings to memorize: 78 cards! 156 if you’re using reversals! Wow - a daunting prospect to be sure! And even when I would periodically decide to memorize those meanings, I ran into the fact that every book I checked seemed to give different meanings for some of the cards. Whose meanings should I memorize? So, for years, I just gave up. Despite my love for these cards, I gave up. So much wasted time!
A little while ago, during a reading from someone I trust, I got word that I was supposed to be working with the cards. This confirmed what I’d always felt but failed to act upon. Well, I’ve recently decided to pursue a working knowledge of the tarot. I’m still a work in progress, but it’s been going well, so I thought I’d share with you what’s been working for me.
1. Find the meanings you’ll be using The first thing I had to do was make peace with the fact that different folks give the cards different meanings. If I wanted to begin learning the meanings, I would have to decide upon one author who seemed to know what they were talking about and stick with that author’s meanings. I realized that once I began to form a relationship with the cards, I’d develop my own nuances and associations with the cards. But I wouldn’t be able to reach that place until I was able to work with them, and I wouldn’t be able to work with them until I had some meanings memorized as a starting point. Kind of like how Pablo Picasso painted like other painters until he became confident enough to develop his own unique style.
2. Divide the deck In order to learn this much information, I decided I’d best break the deck up into bite-sized chunks. I did this by breaking the deck up into six sections: one section for each of the suits of the Minor Arcana, and then I divided the Major Arcana in half. I decided to begin with what I thought would be the hardest part first: learning the Minor Arcana.
3. Turn the deck itself into your flash cards This part felt a bit like sacrilege to me, but I took the cheapest Rider-Waite deck I could find and started taping mini index cards to the back of each tarot card. Instead of just looking at a list in order to learn the cards’ meanings, I wanted to learn to associate each card’s meaning with the actual image on the card. So I took mini index cards and wrote a bunch of key words and key ideas on each one and used packing tape to tape each mini index card to the back of the appropriate tarot card. I tend to be a visual learner, and this step has really turbo charged my learning.
4. Review the deck, a chunk at a time I knew that I wanted to learn the deck well, so I got over the idea that I had to learn quickly. I spent the first week just learning the suit of Cups. I didn’t require of myself that I learn the meaning of each card perfectly; I just had to know it very well. After all, I will keep reviewing them over time and working with them in readings, so there will be plenty of time to refine my knowledge of the meanings. I used a sort of spaced repetition as I reviewed the cards: if I knew the meaning of the card very well, I would put that card at the back of the pile. If I didn’t know it very well, I’d put the card back in the middle of the deck so that I’d review it again before I finished. And if I totally blanked on the meaning of a card, I put it back close to the front of the deck so that I’d get a chance to review it again much sooner.
5. Integrate the next chunk When it came time to learn the next suit, I’d spend a day with just that suit. Then, I would mix the two suits together and review them that way. When I began to study the suit of Swords, I didn’t want to forget the meanings of the suit of Cups. I did the same the next week with Wands, and then with Pentacles. Spend some time with just the new suit, then mix together all the suits you’ve studied thus far.
6. After the third week, make any necessary modifications After you’ve been studying for a while, you’ll notice that the first suit you chose to study is getting the most study time. So, once you’ve been at it for three weeks or more, feel free to spend more time with the suit/cards which you’re finding require more review time. For example, during my fourth week of study, I found that I had been reviewing the suit of Cups for over three weeks and knew it pretty well, so Cups didn’t need as much review time as Wands did, and I took the Cups out of my review pile for the week. At five weeks, as I moved on to the first half of the Major Arcana, I found that I was memorizing the Major Arcana pretty easily. I had thought that I would; that’s why I left them for last. But I found that the court cards (Page, Knight, Queen, and King) of all the suits were giving me an unexpected amount of trouble. So, I decided that my fifth week review deck would consist of the first 11 cards of the Major Arcana along with the court cards of the suits of Cups and Swords (the first two suits I studied), and that my sixth week review deck would consist of the last 11 cards of the Major Arcana along with the court cards of the suits of Wands and Pentacles.
7. Start doing readings, if you haven’t already Once you’ve got basic meanings of all 78 cards mostly memorized (remember, we’re not aiming for 100% perfection!), start doing readings. Doing readings is the real way that you will internalize the meanings of the cards and also how you’ll flesh out the meanings. The meanings will become more layered and complex as you see them in multiple contexts. You’ll likely still need to check your references for the meanings of some of the cards as you do your first readings, but you’ll likely be pleasantly surprised by how often you remember the meanings of the cards. Begin with simpler readings: 1-card readings and 3-card readings. You’re now moving on to taking the basic meanings of the cards and turning them into stories. If the individual cards are like words, a 3-card reading is like a sentence and you’re learning to construct sentences in a new language.
8. Learn (or don’t learn) the Reversed Meanings Up until this point, I haven’t addressed the usage of Reversals: what the cards mean when they show up in a reading upside-down. This is intentional, for several reasons: 1) if learning the meanings of 78 cards was daunting, learning 156 meanings probably would have seemed impossible; 2) some of you may decide not to use reversals; and 3) once you’ve learned the meanings of all 78 cards, you will pretty much already know the reversed meanings.
Easy Tarot for Beginners: Cups
Welcome back to the “Easy Tarot for Beginners” series! For all the current posts in this series, click here. More are on the way, so stay tuned!
Learning to read the tarot can seem like a daunting task, but beginners should know that while it takes time to develop nuanced skill, there are some pretty easy ways to jump in and learn what you need to know to get started.
In this series of posts, I’ll be exploring the minor arcana. Many people tackle this subject by attempting to learn the elemental properties of the four suits and the numerological associations of the numbered cards. These methods are a great foundation and vital to a more complex understanding of the cards, but what if there was a simpler, faster way to learn the minor arcana without rote memorization? Well, there is:
Learn the story.
Each minor arcana suit tells a story, and the meaning of every card within that suit depends on the cards that came before it. When you understand how the story of the cards unfolds, it’s easier to understand what they mean. The story the tarot tells in its imagery is often called the “Fool’s Journey,” so we’ll follow the adventures of the Fool through the minor arcana.
Now, let’s explore the story of the Cups:
A new stirring of emotion arises for the Fool, one that feels positive and full of potential.
The Fool meets another person and recognizes that they, too, share this wonderful feeling! Deciding that they must be kindred spirits, the Fool forges a connection.
Over time, the Fool’s family of kindred souls begins to grow even larger, and they celebrate their union with friendship, revelry, and good times.
After a while, the Fool realizes that despite the festivity and kinship, something crucial is missing. As a result, they grow disillusioned with what once made them happy and begin to isolate themselves.
Unfortunately, the Fool remains withdrawn for too long, and their family of kindred spirits begins to disperse. The three cups that were lifted in revelry before are now spilled, and although some connections still remain, the Fool is too bereaved and regretful to enjoy them.
Having learned a profound lesson, the Fool begins to reminisce fondly about earlier times, finding solace in the happy memories. Now unburdened, the Fool is moved to share their newfound sense of simple peace with others.
Having their head so often in the clouds, however, soon leads the Fool to a place where they are perhaps a bit too optimistic, seeing a number of opportunities for emotional fulfillment that may not actually be there (or, if they are, will almost certainly not pan out the way the Fool imagines).
The Fool learns their lesson the hard way, discovering that sometimes, some things really are too good to be true. Having learned the value of happiness and deciding to finally seek what will truly give them emotional fulfillment, the Fool leaves behind what they know in search of a more meaningful life.
And a meaningful life they find, having discovered the secret to long-term happiness: Self-care and self-satisfaction. After all, if you don’t care for and love yourself, how can you care for and love others? Thus, the Fool spends some time fulfilling themselves rather than seeking fulfillment elsewhere.
Finally, the Fool achieves the happiness that eluded them earlier: Now that they know how to care for themselves, they are finally able to devote themselves to a new family, knowing at last that happiness does not come from what others can offer you, but from giving others what you have to offer.
Keep in mind that there are many ways to interpret the cards; as tarot readers, in a way we are also storytellers, and the story will inevitably change in small ways as each new storyteller tackles the tale. How do you relate to this story? Does it seem accurate to you? Have you had any of these experiences, or have you had other experiences that seem to fit the cards (and story) better?
Wishing you well on your tarot learning journey!
Easy Tarot for Beginners: Swords
Welcome back to the “Easy Tarot for Beginners” series! For all the current posts in this series, click here. More are on the way, so stay tuned!
Learning to read the tarot can seem like a daunting task, but beginners should know that while it takes time to develop nuanced skill, there are some pretty easy ways to jump in and learn what you need to know to get started.
In this series of posts, I’ll be exploring the minor arcana. Many people tackle this subject by attempting to learn the elemental properties of the four suits and the numerological associations of the numbered cards. These methods are a great foundation and vital to a more complex understanding of the cards, but what if there was a simpler, faster way to learn the minor arcana without rote memorization? Well, there is:
Learn the story.
Each minor arcana suit tells a story, and the meaning of every card within that suit depends on the cards that came before it. When you understand how the story of the cards unfolds, it’s easier to understand what they mean. The story the tarot tells in its imagery is often called the “Fool’s Journey,” so we’ll follow the adventures of the Fool through the minor arcana.
Now, let’s explore the story of the Swords:
The Fool has a fresh idea, sudden epiphany, or creative inspiration, or receives new information that prompts these.
A contrary idea or information appears to challenge the first; denial and/or an uneasy stalemate result.
A new, third idea or piece of information breaks the denial/stalemate and causes much mental distress and anguish for the Fool.
A time of intellectual rest occurs in order to provide mental solace after the anguish the Fool has experienced in the 3 of Swords.
The disillusioned Fool then decides to look out for themselves—often at the expense of everyone else. (”They hurt me, why should I care about them?”)
The Fool begins to grow weary and wistful and decides to let go of their painful past, to mourn for what could have been but move forward nevertheless.
Though they have now reached their destination and moved on, the Fool can’t quite shake old, out-for-myself-only habits: They just know better than to get caught!
Inevitably, this kind of living catches up with the Fool and they begin to feel trapped within their own web of loneliness, deceit, and self-sabotage.
The Fool begins to spiral into fear, guilt, and despair; nightmares and catastrophizing thoughts begin to manifest.
The Fool reaps what they have sown, having been stabbed in the back; they have now hit rock bottom.
Keep in mind that there are many ways to interpret the cards; as tarot readers, in a way we are also storytellers, and the story will inevitably change in small ways as each new storyteller tackles the tale. How do you relate to this story? Does it seem accurate to you? Have you had any of these experiences, or have you had other experiences that seem to fit the cards (and story) better?
Wishing you well on your tarot learning journey!
Easy Tarot for Beginners: Wands
Welcome back to the “Easy Tarot for Beginners” series! For all the current posts in this series, click here. More are on the way, so stay tuned!
Learning to read the tarot can seem like a daunting task, but beginners should know that while it takes time to develop nuanced skill, there are some pretty easy ways to jump in and learn what you need to know to get started.
In this series of posts, I’ll be exploring the minor arcana. Many people tackle this subject by attempting to learn the elemental properties of the four suits and the numerological associations of the numbered cards. These methods are a great foundation and vital to a more complex understanding of the cards, but what if there was a simpler, faster way to learn the minor arcana without rote memorization? Well, there is:
Learn the story.
Each minor arcana suit tells a story, and the meaning of every card within that suit depends on the cards that came before it. When you understand how the story of the cards unfolds, it’s easier to understand what they mean. The story the tarot tells in its imagery is often called the “Fool’s Journey,” so we’ll follow the adventures of the Fool through the minor arcana.
Now, let’s explore the story of the Wands:
A new opportunity for success and spiritual fulfillment presents itself to the Fool, if they are willing to work for it.
The Fool decides that they are willing, and since they are at the beginning of their journey and have the world in their hands, they must decide what direction to take their newfound inspiration.
Having chosen a direction and begun their enterprise successfully, The Fool begins to reap their first successes.
Success is now assured, and the Fool rejoices at their accomplishment—not only in their enterprise, but in their quest for independence.
Now that The Fool is successful, others rise to challenge them.
Yet, The Fool emerges triumphant! They retain their crown and others look to them for leadership; The Fool has been tested and proven themselves worthy.
However, the Fool soon learns that being on top isn’t easy: The Fool can’t satisfy everyone, and they must learn to hold their ground when they make the decisions they feel are best.
The Fool is almost established now and their hustling days are coming to an end, but there are still things they need to get done themselves while they still have the energy.
The Fool is growing weary, but they cannot rest: They must be prepared to both defend their empire and make the final push toward greatness.
The Fool has now achieved everything they ever dreamed of, but with success comes the incredible burden of maintenance that they must now bear.
Keep in mind that there are many ways to interpret the cards; as tarot readers, in a way we are also storytellers, and the story will inevitably change in small ways as each new storyteller tackles the tale. How do you relate to this story? Does it seem accurate to you? Have you had any of these experiences, or have you had other experiences that seem to fit the cards (and story) better?
Wishing you well on your tarot learning journey!
Cartomancy ABC Guide
What is Cartomancy?
Cartomancy is divining with playing cards. Each card has a meaning and are interpreted by the reader who organizes them into certain spreads. Spreads are the way that the playing cards are set onto the table and I’ll be talking about them more later. Some readers integrate their spirituality into their readings, calling upon deities or spirit guides or connecting with their higher self. Others may use their beliefs to explain how cartomancy works.
Card Meanings
Hearts
Regarding emotions and home
Ace: New friendship or romance
Two: Deepening attractions
Three: Joy in company, friendship, or celebration
Four: Turning inwards, apathy
Five: Despair, loss
Six: Childhood, nostalgia, good memories, old frienship
Seven: Daydreaming, wishful thinking, choices
Eight: Emotional detachment, leaving love behind, making a hard choice
Nine: Satisfaction, sensual pleasure, spiritual growth
Ten: Contentment, fulfillment, joy, family
Jack: Falls in love easily, romantic, talkative
Queen: Emotionally dependent, empathetic
King: Wise, tolerant, diplomatic, feeling, patient
Diamonds
Regarding work and out-of-house affairs
Ace: New projects, home, or success
Two: Juggling resources, waiting for results
Three: Teamwork, improving skills
Four: Possessiveness
Five: Loss of items, job, or money
Six: Giving or receiving money, a pay raise, obtaining resources
Seven: Reassessment, turning point, mild dissatisfaction
Eight: Paying attention to details, focus, practice
Nine: Independence, self-reliance, increasing wealth
Ten: Great wealth, family, property, or inheritance
Jack: Reliable, hard working, quiet, hidden depth
Queen: Practical, warm, dependent, motherhood
King: Self-made, business, encouraging
Clubs
Regarding finances
Ace: New ideas, business action
Two: Planning, preparation
Three: Leadership, exploration
Four: A goal achieved, rest from action
Five: Competition, disagreement, irritation
Six: Victory, achievements, passing exams
Seven: Defense, conviction, strong belief
Eight: Organization, moving quickly, pregnancy
Nine: Continuing a balance, endurance
Ten: Carrying burdens, doubt
Jack: Unreliable, hot headed, risk taker, athletic
Queen: Energetic, career minded, untidy
King: Creative, forceful, hot-tempered
Spades
Regarding road blocks and difficulties
Ace: New insights, realizations
Two: Failure to communicate
Three: Miscommunication, misunderstanding
Four: Recuperation, recovery, contemplation
Five: Discord, dishonor, hollow victory
Six: Moving on, travel, mentally getting to a better place
Seven: Lying, deceit, theft, irresponsibility
Eight: Illusion of being trapped, powerlessness
Nine: Nightmares, problems, worry, guilt
Ten: Giving up, victim, martyrdom
Jack: Rebel, fights for a cause, intellectual, political
Queen: sharp intelligence, ruthless, insight, organization
King: Introspective, ethical, communication, stern
I use the joker to represent unlimited potential but I’ve seen various meanings.
Spreads
Here’s an example of a cartomancy spread:
A reader places a card on every rectangle pictured above. They would then apply the meaning of the card to the situation it stands for. A spread sets up the situation you are looking to divine about. Here is a spread focusing on a person’s whole life but a reader could lay out a spread that’s centered on a person’s love, job opportunities, or present struggles.
Cartomancy tips
If doing a face-to-face reading, it’s a good idea to ask the receiver to shuffle the cards. This allows them to connect to the cards and engage in the reading.
When you draw the cards, you can choose from the top of the deck or spread them out and choose whichever call to you.
There is more to consider in cartomancy than the set card meanings. A group of certain colored cards can be significant as can a group of court cards (kings, queens, jacks)
The more you know about the cards, the easier readings become.
…if you have any questions just say „psipsipsi“ and I‘ll come to you 😅😂🤣
"Slowly is the fastest way to get where you want to be"
Things I have learned from my time on Twitter
The best thing about having a blog is that I can write what I like, when I like. Because it's my blog and I'm not using it to fund my livelihood (...yet. Hahaha!). So this means I get to write about things that I give a damn about without thought of an audience. Usually it means I use this as an outlet to work through things. In fact, that's how this whole thing started - as an outlet to get through a rather shit time in my life. At the beginning of last year I remembered that I had a twitter account that I barely used. This was mostly because I didn't really get it. As a result, I decided to challenge myself and throw myself into the medium to see what happened and if I'd eventually understand it. What eventually happened was that I used twitter as an outlet to get through a rather tumultuous time in my life. I'm reporting back over a year later. It's been quite an experience and has been a rather fab and, dare I say it, essential part of my life during that time. I've found out tips, tricks and recommendations on a variety of subjects. I've won beauty products, wine, food and vouchers. I've watched a community pull together in the aftermath of a tragedy. I've made amazing friends who've been incredibly supportive and bought some real joy and sparkle to my life when I needed it most. I love those guys. There have been some real down-times too. I've done embarrassing things that I'm still reminded about. I've experienced the weird high of getting 100+ RT's and the abuse that followed. I've met people who seemed nice online and were rude in person, then subtweeting assholes online. I've been upset and let down by situations that held so much promise. I've been hurt and in tears over things people have said to me or about me or even done to me. Those times really sucked. But overall, the whole experience has been quite positive. The good times have far, far outweighed the bad times.
People are the same everywhere, whether it's online or in person. It's a generally accepted rule that an online persona can be very different from a real-life persona. A quiet, shy and rather nice person can be one tough motherfucker online. The girl who is generally ignored and not hit on can escape online and try to morph herself into some seductive temptress. But above all, everyone is the same. It's generally not hard to see what people are really like. If you become involved in Twitter for long and heavily enough, your persona will slip at some stage. People will see you. People are just as transparent online as they are in real-life.
There is no substitute for authenticity.
There are "Nice Guys" there too - those bastards are everywhere! They are also to be avoided like the plague. For reference, actual nice guys never advertise that they're nice guys. Actual nice guys don't finish last. I'm talking about those other "Nice Guys" who rush to defend or reply to everything you write. What I'm really saying here is, there are creeps here too. Don't give them your phone number or any of your contact details, don't meet them in real-life, but if you do, make sure someone knows where the hell you are and will come get you. Don't be stupid when meeting people.
It's personality based. Your pic may attract people, but your personality will keep them coming back.
Good looking girls will always be popular. In real-life and online, forever and always. People are attracted to pretty. Make peace with that already.
You will find your niche. If you put the work in, it will reward you ten-fold with a group of people that you can happily talk with at any time and who even seem to like you. It's a great feeling.
It is absolutely possible to make friends on the internet. Anyone who thinks otherwise needs to break out of their narrow mindset. It's possible to make friends anywhere! Twitter people are real people with real feelings and real emotions, some of whom you will like enough to strike up a friendship with. How awesome is that?
Just as it's possible to make friends, it's possible to lose them too. As it is in real-life, so it will be online.
There's no such thing as 'deleted' on the internet. I can't emphasise this enough. If you tweet something or put up a picture that you may regret, then it's out there forever. Yes, someone will find what you've written or a damning pic you've put up. Yes, you will be judged by it. Be prepared to stand by everything you put up there or don't put it up at all. In other words, don't be a stupid fucking idiot.
It is what you make of it. Your TL is unique to you and is something you control. If you don't like it anymore, change it up! Too much negativity? Either hange your outlook or change your TL. Or both. Take a break. Don't blame the medium for losing it's sparkle. After all, you're the one who controls it.
At the end of the day, this is no substitute for a real-life and connections with real people. It is however, a really nice complement to it and a great way to kill time while on public transport. It's not dangerous, it's not scary and it won't wreck your life unless you let it or use it that way. It's just social media. Just have some damn fun with it!
Alone...
I discovered a photograph in my wallet, it was shoved in there with a few other things from years ago. I was about 13 or so, my brother and sister (both older than me) were in the front. It was taken in one of those photo booths at the mall. They had their heads together and in the opening between their neck and shoulders you could see my chin and mouth. I remember that moment. My mouth had a smile. But I remember their heads coming in front of mine. Forgotten I was there. The little sister.... It bothered me then but I had gotten used to it. They aged earlier than I did, so I lost my playmates early, they hung on tight together. I used to beg them to play with me, do things with me, but they wouldn't. I had always wished the roles would switch because I would always play with my little siblings, I'd take care of them because I know how important it was. But we're not kids anymore and once I got older, they noticed me because they had too, but that same distance is between us. I'm still the one standing alone. It's what I've become used to and it's what they still do not understand. But what I've learned is how important one person can be, I didn't have friends then either so siblings was all I had. I didn't get that after while either. One day I will have a family of my own, and if I have children which I most likely will, that is one of the major lessons I will teach them. To have empathy, kindness, compassion, understanding for their siblings and anyone else that comes in their path. As the last thing I want them to feel is this...alone.
Sequoia Red (via Sequoia Red)
A quote about learning to live your own life rather than someone else's from "You Are a Badass".
Year 2016
One thing has become clear to me as I look back this past year: it’s that I have to stop giving into it – to self-doubt, to sorrow, to pain.
There are so many instances in my life in which I allowed myself to fall and be bruised. I let myself be broken. I let myself be paralyzed by failure in fear of having to go through it all over again. Our society seems to think nowadays that it is completely okay to romanticize pain and nestle it in our hearts – and so we do and stay broken. But here’s the shocking line that not all of us take time to realize, and only this year did I learn; being in pain is not a way to live. We have to be smart enough to rise above that pain.
Earlier in the year, I had someone who I genuinely loved walk away from my life. The first days of grief were the hardest. It was an incredibly difficult concept to accept that some stories of love only exist for a certain period. It isn’t his fault nor mine. A failed relationship isn’t a reflection of who the individuals involved are as a person. It’s just that no could have predicted the future and no one could have known that it was simply not meant to be. Both parties were only doing the best they could at the time, and he and I both owed it to ourselves to take a leap of faith. Of course I learned all these in hindsight. But before it sunk in that was truly over, I carried the pain and what I believed then to be a defeat with me for months on end. I thought it was only natural to do that and therefore, okay. They say a good cry is what you need after a break-up — but crying and thinking about it longer than you should? No. To berate and lose yourself in regret and self-doubt? No.
What I failed to factor in in all this wallowing was myself. Showering someone with love and care may be beautiful and noble, but I have to bestow these qualities upon myself too. I deserve to give myself the same love that I keep giving to someone else. Hanging onto negativity and self-pity only hinders me from growing. Blanketing myself with sadness only tears me down, not build me up. Pain and sadness are not armors to wear until I become strong again. Strength, I now fully realized, is gained when one rises above and overcomes all these miseries.
This coming 2017, I hope that I stop being hard on myself. I should let light flood in and loosen my grasp on the pain that I’ve held onto for so long. I hope to embrace happiness when given it and treat myself with as much kindness and care that I keep on insisting I be able to impart to others. Loss, in any form, shouldn’t have to be an indication to doubt ourselves but a revelation to love ourselves better.
Want to learn something new in 2022??
Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)
40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)
Excellent basic crochet video series
Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)
Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)
How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)
Another drawing character faces video
Literally my favorite art pose hack
Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??
Introduction to flying small aircrafts
French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding
Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)
Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)
Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)
Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:
Calculus 1 (full semester class)
Learn basic statistics (free textbook)
Introduction to college physics (free textbook)
Introduction to accounting (free textbook)
Learn a language:
Ancient Greek
Latin
Spanish
German
Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)
French
Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)
What if the purpose of life is that theres none
like, theres no purpose in life, and we have to accept that. What if thats the purpose.
Acceptance.