Feeling Rough - Tumblr Posts

Today marks the end of day 3 of whatever this illness is. Our best guess is still some sort of food poisoning? Though there has been no exploding, north or south.

A different friend is going to stay here tomorrow so we can head to the ER.

I've taken two different kinds of pain meds (the last of previous health issues which warranted them) and neither have helped. One helped briefly (MAYBE an hour tops) then wore off. The second simply, never kicked in/helped at all.

The pain is slowly getting worse in waves, for me. Husband is rollercoasting between feeling like he is improving only for it to turn around and knock him on his ass again. My poor hubs.....still is working his shift again. Last night and now tonight. Idk how he can focus at all with this. Blessed with brains and endurance, he is.

Thankfully our boys are still unaffected. Which more solidifies that it was something we ate, not something we caught. Since in the last week we havent shared the same meals as our littles.

A tender moment was shared between our eldest and hubs, though. Hubs came upstairs to see the littles before they eventually go to bed. He laid on the couch, his head on our eldest's lap. Our LO patted dad's head with one hand and the other rubbed his back. To comfort him. Clearly seeing something has been off.

After a few minutes hubs sat up and gave a peck on his forehead. To which our LO replied gently "go to bed". Gods I wish I'd gotten that whole moment on camera. It was so sweet. Hubs retired to his den/office and my eldest is still sitting here beside me. Winding down with Little Bear.

Youngest just got put down for bed. Soon eldest will as well.

I'm still sitting here, silently writhing in pain awaiting the approaching bedtime. (When I groaned during a spike of pain earlier, eldest immediately tuned in, concerned, asking what was wrong. Such a sweet kid. Love him, love them, so much. 🥲😭💙)

So here's to hoping tomorrow is a better day.

🤞🏻⭐🤞🏻⭐🤞🏻⭐🤞🏻⭐🤞🏻⭐🤞🏻

I'm having a really hard time just existing right now.

My body is in so much pain. My mind is in so much pain.

I'm trying not to spiral but it's so friggin hard.

I'm deteriorating. The very few people close to me, are deteriorating. It feels like everything is just kind of falling apart.

I know I shouldn't isolate. I know I just need to get through the day and get some sleep tonight. (I was awake all night, yay insomnia)

I'm so tired of my body hurting. I'm so tired of my heart/mind hurting. (Depression and so on creeping back into its stronghold again since I had to go off the new meds I had tried and reacted horribly to a diff one not the recently complained about one)

Feeling very doom and gloom about existence.

Meh.