Guess What - Tumblr Posts
lolllllllllll
watching lady bird (2017) every time my mum and i have a fight lolllllllllll
FO4 Reactions - shitpost edition
Includes: Nick Valentine, John Hancock, Paladin Danse, DiMA, Edward Deegan
❗️TW: going on my nsfw page bc i use my depression for funny. suicide jokes ahead. i am 100000% shitposting rn. don’t like it don’t read. this is my nsfw account so mdni k thnks bye❗️
here’s how my favorite idiots (affectionate term) would react to their future s/o stopping them in the middle of fuck all to say “not to be over dramatic but if you asked me to kms I would let you pick the gun”. this is not a cry for help
-notes-
come one come all, I have a new reactions post for my fallout boys
i say boys because I can’t catch a fucjing break and they won’t let me travel with all of them or let them confess their undying love for me (uncompromisable. they’re all head over heels for me.)
here we go
-no-nose-notes-
nick valentine
- “no???????”
- very confused
- doesn’t get the joke
- why do people keep doing this?
- he will offer help until you do explain
- once you explain it he might bitch slap u ngl
- 6.3/10 gets points for trying
john hancock
- “get in line bitch”
- gets the joke immediately
- has definitely used it before
- probably on nick
- enjoys having you wrapped around his finger
- 7.6/10 gets my humor
paladin danse (og)
- “please don’t”
- very confused. why would you hurt yourself?
- thinks your serious
- puts you on suicide watch “for your own good”
- 2.3/10 i didn’t enjoy the prewar hospital stay and i didn’t enjoy the apocalyptic one
paladin danse (post bb)
- tries to make a suicide pact
- 0/10 dc security didnt help me talk him down at all
dima
- “I hope you’re not being serious”
- it catches him off guard
- but he knows you’re joking pretty quickly
- he’ll never tell you but he enjoys the power play a little too much
- 7.5/10 a kinky toaster
edward deegan
- wordlessly hands you a gun
- definitely trying to test how far you’re willing to take the joke
- really thinks I won’t do it for the vine
- 0/10 wilhelmina is upset about the stains
The three firebrands (and guests)- Incorrect Quotes Part 11
I started playing SWTOR yesterday evening and needless to say I’m above level 30 now and it’s really, really distracting and time consuming but seriously idc for that, I enjoy playing
Anyways here you go, that’s the reason why I’m posting this late (and I’m pretty sure I forgot yesterday
Elzar: can I dye my hair pink
Stellan: no.
[5 hours later]
Avar, dyeing Elzars hair pink: You gotta Show him that you don’t give a fuck
Avar and Elzar: [in jail]
Elzar: So who do we call?
Avar: i would call Stellan but I feel safer in prison
Avar: [bleeding out on the floor]
Elzar: quick, Stellan get the medkit, Avar what's your type
Avar, half unconscious: oh i like two at the same time yk, dark hair, blue or brown eyes ‘nd total idiots
Stellan: he means your blood type, dummy
Avar: oh
Avar: …red
Stellan: now tell me who’s the idiot again
Stellan: i trust Elzar and Avar
Vernestra: do you think they know what they’re doing
Stellan: i wouldn't go that far
I present you: the so-called “Dog of the Military”, Edward Elric! Since state alchemists get called this name and there’s a dog filter on Snapchat…it was like putting one and one together ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ^^
W I P # 1
an idea came up to mind
guess what it is?
*evil laugh*
it's not a 100% infection rate. but there is a disease you get if you spend too long liking disco elysium where eventually you find harry attractive
Desi culture is "give me a red pen of any colour"
anon, time to bring back the WhatsApp forwards :')
Desi culture is also :-
BrInG mE a wOrLd mAp oF InDiA tOmOrRoW.
I wIlL tAkE a sUrpRisE tEsT oN MoNdaY, sO plEaSe bE prEpArEd.
I hAvE tWo dAugHtErS. BoTh aRe gIrLs.
BrInG yOuR pAreNts aNd yOuR mOtHeR aNd eSpeCiAlLy yoUr fAtHeR tO sChoOl tOmoRrOw.
STanD iN a sTraIgHt cIrCle.
PiCk tHe pApeR aNd fAll iNtO tHe dUsTbIN.
BOtH oF yoU sTanD tOgEtHer sEpeRateLy.
KEeP qUiTe tHe pRiNcIpAl jUst pAssEd aWay!
WiLl yOu hAng tHe cAleNdar oR sHoUld I hAnG mYseLf?
*prev is the blog you reblogged this post from as a surprising amount of people didnt know it on my previous posts
Fitness this, fitness that. Everyone's always saying to stay fit! To stay active!
Someone wanna explain why gym membership are 20€ a month??? Do I look rich??? Do I shit money????
not to say that the call times on a doctor's website shouldn't be confusing but I think I have better odds at finding Atlantis than to choose the right number/time that won't get me yelled at
telling a doctor's secretary that they should probably change their website to not include stuff they don't do, apparently warrants very rude answers from said secretary ....
Oh well. Guess I'll be the breadwinner then
guys hot uquiz was just discovered but I'm taking it about 100 yrs too late. anyways everyone share how wifeable you are.
THE WIFE RATING SCALE 1929
Y'know, I've always kinned Kyonosuke, but never as much as I did in this single line.
Cocanut water
Okay so... I had cocanut water for the first time yesterday and I just have to ask....
Why does it taste like liquid corn chips?
most “protect the children” campaigns come with the implication that what’s best for children is 1950s white christian nuclear families and rigid adherence to the status quo, and having been a children I can definitively say that is very very incorrect
I've read this twice. I wasn't satisfied with the amount of pain I've been through reading, so I read another time. It's not about the angst - there is a lot, I should warn - but the "I miss the story the plotline the characters and everything else" kind of re-reading.
This is probably THE fanfiction if you're feeling sad and in a true need for a cuddle. They cuddle A LOT and I love it so so much it even hurts. My favorite parts were definitely those, where intimacy is at the highest point (for me, I guess), and the comfort that it irradiated, even when the smuts came, were *chef's kiss* amazing.
It's already a fav and I know, I just know, I'm gonna read it again, so I need to save this wonderful piece the author gently posted for everyone. Speaking of them: thank you so much for this! Your mind is beautiful and so is your writing. Can't wait to read more!
Sugarplum Elegy (M)
Pairing | Jungkook x Reader Genre | Fluff, smut, angst / College!AU, FWB!AU, Soundcloud singer!AU, Idiots to Lovers!AU Warnings | Explicit language, hopeless and helpless pining, constipated feelings, lots of smut, rimming, cum-eating, spitting, blowjob, fingering, classroom sex, Jungkook is emotionally constipated but wbk Summary | You know no bounds nor depth with Jungkook. While your fuck buddy loves sleeping in your bed and doing laundry for you with his favourite fabric softener, you are in love with a mysterious honeyed, velvety voice on Soundcloud. All’s fine, until you find out that the voice that metaphors your heart to a sweet sugarplum melody actually belongs to the boy who has been taking up a special spot in your bed and in your heart, strumming at your heartstrings all this while.
Or, Jungkook has one braincell, but it’s heart-shaped.
Word count | 17.9k
There’s no greater testament to love than love itself – the sheer vulnerability of being bound to someone emotionally and physically, and the aching process that bleeds into infinity. To love in every sense of the word is to offer your entire heart and place it on someone’s bare hands, despite knowing that they might crush it in front of your very eyes.
Maybe love is like a dandelion, pretty during the summer mornings, but upon a huge gust of wind, its petals will be blown away, leaving its heart barren, abandoned. Given your past relationships, forming a fresh new ache and vulnerability for yet another person frightens the fuck out of you.
So when you wake up to a Jeon Jungkook beside you, lulled by the quiet sound of his breathing, your heart fizzles in your chest. It’s a no-strings-attached agreement that you two have decided on at the beginning of the year, but it’s still a feeling you can’t quite get accustomed to, especially when the first thing you see in the morning is his peaceful sleeping face, unless he’s spooning you, in which his warm breath will tickle the back of your nape. It’s weird because it feels nice, feels so right.
It’s been six months since you two started the whole fuckbuddy agreement, yet you still can’t get used to how warm Jungkook is, always so warm, as if the sun has chiselled its way into every single pore of your body, softening and melting your sharp edges. While his body still sends zaps down your spine, your mind registers that you’ve grown to adore the heat of his body when your cold feet always find themselves tangled together with his under the sheets.
He’s not much of a morning person, but sometimes, you’d wake up to him staring at you, caressing every detail of your face with his eyes, sunlight glittering golden in them, and smiling like a fool (an adorable one at that) at your groggy and sleepy self, as though your crusty morning face turns him on because it often leads to the continuation of the previous night’s copulation before scrambling to class.
You know no bounds nor depth with Jeon Jungkook. If anything, you’ve concluded that you’ve never met a person quite like him before, like the cosmos has moved for this concurrence to be possible.
Continuar lendo
LOUDER FOR THOSE IN THE BACK.
I don’t understand how anyone can defend cops a this point. It’s not one person, or one precinct, or one city. These murders are performed with extreme prejudice by cops all over this country. That’s not a typo, they are absolutely murders - cold blooded abuses of power. They’re also acts of oppression. The people being slaughtered aren’t chosen randomly. Black people, with special focus on black trans women, are overwhelmingly being targeted and picked off. If you support cops, you support a tax payer funded weaponized tool for wielding systemic racism.
It’s basically that simple.
people who think you can easily go anywhere in europe have never tried taking a train in italy
me being a proshipper is so funny. last year or something, i would actually start raging and foaming at the mouth at any ship that was different than mine, even if it wasn't com
my old self would be so disappointed and weirded out lmaoo