Jess Rants - Tumblr Posts

You know, I don’t think that Kim Seokjin, Min Yoongi, Jung Hoseok, Kim Namjoon, Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung, and Jeon Jungkook really understand how devoted ARMY are to making them as happy and successful as we possibly can.

The way we would go to war for these men, who came together under an unknown entertainment company slotted to fail against the Big Names. They came from humble origins as a group and was never expected by the industry to have even one (1) hit, let alone be the hottest group on the planet and achieve so much that they were told and believed was impossible. The way they are people, doing what they love, and being themselves and we love them for it. The fact that yes they may be unattainable, but they connect with ARMY so easily and share so many of the same experiences. The way they talk about heavy things so openly, and have brought so many people together through these things and their music.

Purple means something more because of them.

I know they know we’re here for them. I know they know we’re prepared to show up, post up, suit up, etc.

I just don’t think they truly know the joy and acceptance they have brought to the world, just by chasing their dreams, speaking their stories, and being authentic (well, as authentic as allowed in K-Pop). I don’t think that they understand that most of us have no expectations on them to be perfect, because to us they will be regardless. They’re selfless, kind, goofy, dorky—so much, and we love every minute of it. They make us feel like we’re not alone, even when the world tells us “they don’t know you exist”, “they’re just a boy band”, “you’re so obsessed over something so stupid” and worse, because it doesn’t matter what the world says. We have BTS, and they have us, and it is one of the best relationships in the world. So much has been accomplished. So much is yet to come.

They will always be bulletproof, because they have an ARMY behind them. Purple will always mean never ending love.

Wherever they go from here, they will be those seven boys chasing their dreams with their whole beings, collecting other lost souls along the way.

And that is beautiful.

💜

I have finally admitted to myself that I will have absolutely nothing ready to post before or on Christmas.

You see, back in 2020, my grandfather died on a ventilator from Covid on December 25; on Christmas. Last year I was so sick I guess that I didn’t think much about it, but this year it’s really bothering me. I have no motivation to do anything this month because I just keep remembering that at this time 2 years ago, he was sick and dying. He was alone in the hospital, in pain, and then he was sedated for the ventilator and he just…

Anyway. Sorry guys. Maybe next year

If my father says one more condescending/secretly judgmental/hurtfully sarcastic thing to me today I am either going to absolutely explode on him or just go off to bed and cry. I’m leaning towards the exploding thing, because he’s an in-denial, not-so-sneaky alcoholic who is using his extremely mild case of COVID back in fucking AUGUST as an excuse to leaving mom to do everything or it just go undone and I am SEETHING.

I’m this 👌 close to telling him to stop acting like his mother, which short of saying I hate him is the worst thing I could say (I would never say I hate him, I DO love him just don’t necessarily like him atm)

Well. I was informed last night by a friend that Seoulmates has been uploaded without my permission not only on AO3 (under a far less creative name), but on here as well.

If your an OG follower, you may remember that the entire reason this blog exists is because the KPop blog I posted on before was shared with someone who had been caught plagiarizing (on a separate, non-KPop blog), and I didn’t feel comfortable being associated with her anymore. For good reason, it seems, because (surprise, surprise) she’s the one who stole my work and reposted it.

She has since blocked me (saw it coming), and deleted the blog (I have lots of friends to keep you in check chica) as well as has taken Seoulmates down on AO3.

Like…honestly. How did you think that was going to go? I haven’t updated in over a year. Were you planning on picking it up and writing the rest? How were you going to explain the shift in style, tone, even fucking grammar to your followers? Did you think it wouldn’t get back to me? Really?

Do better.

So.

Psych doctor doesn’t want to label whatever my condition or disorder is yet because (surprise fucking surprise) I don’t fit into any mental disorder category enough to even make a diagnosis. Not at this point in time.

Also, he got rid of a lot of my meds that weren’t working. 👏👏👏 hallelujah

Anyway, what’s up with y’all?

The older generation (not boomers here, older than even them) really ain’t shit are they?