Jjba Esidisi - Tumblr Posts
Pillar Men Incorrect Quotes
Kars: *Trying to fill out legal paperwork stuff* Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB?
Esidisi: Bold of you to assume I was born at all.
Wamuu: I personally was created in a lab.
Santana: I just straight up spawned lol.
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Cop: You’re receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.
Kars: Shit.
Esidisi: Wait, three?
Cop: Yeah?
Wamuu: OH MY GOD SANTANA FELL OFF!!!
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Kars: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Esidisi: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD
Kars: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING WAMUU WITH ME
Santana, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.
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Kars: I think we're missing something.
Esidisi: Teamwork?
Wamuu: Cohesion?
Santana: A general sense of what we’re doing?
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Kars: *Screams*
Esidisi: *Screams louder to establish dominance*
Wamuu: Should we do something?
Santana: No, I want to see who wins.
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Kars: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Esidisi: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Wamuu: I got distracted about halfway through.
Santana: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
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Kars: Dammit, Esidisi!
Esidisi: What?! It wasn’t me!
Kars: Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, Wamuu!
Wamuu: Not me either.
Kars: Oh...Then who set the house on fire?
Santana: *whistles*
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Kars: I prevented a murder today.
Esidisi: Really? How’d you do that?
Kars: self control.
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Kars: English is a difficult language. It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though.
Esidisi: You need to stop.
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Wamuu: Santana was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some.
Santana: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it.
Wamuu: Santana, you ate a chair.
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Wamuu: What are your goals?
Santana: To pet all the dogs.
Wamuu: No, fitness goals.
Santana: To be able to run fast enough to pet all the dogs.
More Pillar Men Quotes (feat. ME)!
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Kars, Entering Esidisi's room: Andii did it again.
Esidisi: Peace disturbance?
Kars: What no-
Esidisi: Arson..?
Kars: NO, JESUS CHRIST, HOW MANY-
Esidisi: uh....Attempted murder?
Kars: NO, THEY ATE ALL THE FOOD IN THE FRIDGE, BUT WHAT THE FU-
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Esidisi, pointing to the wall: What color is this?
Wamuu: Gray.
Kars: Grey.
Esidisi, turning to Andii: Now tell them what color you think it is.
Andii: Dark white.
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Wamuu: Your smile? It makes my day.
Esidisi: Your happiness? I live for that.
Kars: A room? Get one.
Andii: Hotel? Trivago.
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Wamuu: Well, has Esidisi been wrong before?
Andii: How wide are we willing to open this up?
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Andii: And now for a gay update with Kars and Esidisi.
Esidisi: Getting gayer.
Andii: Thank you, Esidisi.
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Andii: I really like Eminem.
Santana: I prefer skittles.
Wamuu: They are talking about the rapper.
Santana: Why would they eat the wrapper?
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Andii: Hey, Esidisi you're smart, tell me what would happen if I chugged 3 gallons of chloroform.
Esidisi: Have you ever been to a mortuary?
Andii: Yea, my grandma lives there.
Kars: That is the worst response to that question.
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Santana: Are you a painting?
Andii: What-?
Santana: Because I want to pin you to a wall.
Wamuu: OH GOD I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO SAY YOU WANTED TO HANG THEM OR SOMETHING-
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Andii: I dare you-
Kars: Esidisi is not allowed to accept dares anymore.
Andii: Why not?
Esidisi: "I have no regard for my own or others personal safety", as some would say.
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Andii: Why does Kars always do the laundry so loudly?
Esidisi: So everyone knows that no one helps them out in the house.
Kars, in the distance: *slams the washing machine shut*
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Andii: I'm gonna eat the chicken breasts!
Kars, snickering: Yeah, eat what you lack.
Esidisi, deadpanning at Kars: Then maybe I should order brains on delivery for you.
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Andii: Dinosaurs aren't extinct. I mean, Kars is walking in this room.
Esidisi: *wheeze*
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Wamuu: Self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath or putting on a lot of make up if you like that, or taking a nice warm nap and stuff like that basically.
Andii: Self care is the burning heat when rage washes over you. self care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists. self care is the fear in your enemies eyes.
Santana: Self care is stealing someones birthday cake just to eat the frosting.
Andii: If you touch my birthday cake I’ll make you eat your hands.
This just came to me, but i think its a valid theory:
I know some people who watched jojo dub complained about the accents, but hear me out; it actually makes sense.
Remember how when Santana learned English in a couple minutes simply from hearing Stroheim speak? Well. I think the reason the other pillar men have accents is because of the fact they listened to Joseph speak, and since he's British, they all kinda developed that accent as well simply from learning the language through Joseph talking. This would entirely make sense since the only people they encountered upon awakening that actually spoke to them were Joseph and Caesar.
Thank you for coming to my ted talk.
Accurate
Pillar men: Ass, tits, chub, or thighs
Kars
All thighs for the being. He loves the feeling of your soft thighs as he gropes and nuzzle into your thighs.
Esidisi
I could imagine him as an ass man. No matter how big your ass is he is all over you. He will smack your ass when you walk by or if he sees you bending over to get something.
Wamuu
Tits for this man. He likes to lay on those soft melons after he has had a hard training day or if he just wants to relax. Sometimes if you listen close enough, you can hear him purr as he nuzzles into your boobs.
Santana
He is a chubby chaser. If you have a soft tummy, he will be all over you. He likes to nuzzle into your stomach when the other pillarmen have gotten on his last nerve.
Who was gonna tell me this man wears a RING- they really ARE married 👀
