Just Life Things - Tumblr Posts
You can shut the windows,
But never stop the November rain,
You can run as far as the ocean goes,
But I feel your breath, always close.
I don't understand how could that be reality,
Will your memories ever offer pity?
-jay.
I realised I turned into my mom when it made me happy to see fabric softener and detergent in a combo offer. #adultingsucks
I am not insecure about the way I look.
With your silence, my confidence is what you took.
I am not the one ignoring friends
With your ultimatum, that's what I did under duress
I am not someone who cries at night
With your decision, It never ends, i couldn't put up a fight.
I am not someone who breaks easy, or so I thought
When you left, I am broken into pieces, I don't even recognise the leftover parts.
-jay.
All these positive notes and reminders keep telling us to live, and not to survive. Not to just merely exist with routine and be sad at the end of the day. But isn't it also a part of living? Isn't it part of being human to be exhausted ?! Why should I be made guilty of a normal human emotion? I survived today. Not happy. What's wrong with it? I'll live tomorrow!! Let me survive today without guilt.
I realised "keeping it together" doesn't mean, saving your sanity so you don't fall. It actually means losing it everyday, you are already inside the motion of endless falling.. and yet you have to live and do everything you need to do to survive. Now that is "keeping it together", surviving when you don't know when you'll drop down and die, but you know you are falling.
Isn't it funny how simple things are saving lives?
In an awkward point in life, in the middle of heartbreaking pain, all it took was one hug from mom and one press of a hand from a friend in silence to remind the warmth is not gone from the world yet.
The unhung painting.
Shadows of dead dried leaf,
The golden Sun falling.
These tell the love I have for you,
Even after you leave!!
You can shut the windows all you want,
But never stop the leftover rain on your lawn!
I used to be angry with my friend who took her own life. Now I don't. I used to be confused about why she did what she did. Now I feel very bad. That poor thing would have gone through hell again and again to have pushed towards it. I feel sorry none of us saw it. I see it now.
Why are we manipulating ourselves into lives where it becomes necessary for survival. Why can't we just live. Just. For the sake of it!
People say you are being creative, different from others and thinking unique when you write poems , you know they are wrong but can't quite point it.
Recently I found a post that said it !
"how many people have pulled up pens, brushes and words because they cannot pull a rifle".
I'm not special, I'm just surviving.
-jay.
I love me.
I knew what I was . I knew who he was .I loved the person he was.
Then he disappeared. I loved the person I knew.
Then he showed up just to push me away. I loved the way he loved me.
Then he said he found someone. I loved the way I loved him.
I don't know who he is anymore. I don't know who I am anymore. But I love him, and so I love the person I am.
Now the word 'love' has lost all its meaning. Catch is... Maybe it never had one.
-jay.
Because someone said, "don't just take pictures of everything you want to remember, but also take pictures of everything easy to forget.."
Maybe I'm like that first Chalk in the pack
Half way through, and everyone wants new.
Maybe my overthinking is bad.
It's not like, I can dial it down to zero!
It's something I've always had....
But Gotham got an hero
After one scared boy's over-reaction
To what 'you' call a normal human emotion.
-jay.
At any point in time, she was equally filled with guilt and hope.
He knew it was a dangerous configuration for a heart to be.
"there is no batman without alfred" ♥️
People keep telling me to move on.
But from what? From this ability to love even after I've been dead. From the strength to trust even after being lost. From being human even after realising only few are left??
Being strong does not mean, you keep your heart rigid to let anything affect you. Being strong is keeping your heart open and soft, let everything the world has to offer reach your heart, affect it beautifully, when it pains...get back up. That's called being strong.
Being the darkness itself makes it easier to find light, only if you accept who you are.