Levi Ackerman Fanfic - Tumblr Posts

♡ Expendable Hearts: Masterlist ♡

title: expendable hearts pairing: levi ackerman x ex! afab reader genre: angst, fluff, romantic comedy (i'll try my best), exes to lovers, enemies to lovers, inspired by our beloved summer (kdrama), alternative universe - modern setting, college setting as flashbacks, mutual pining, mc is dumb, levi is dumb, they're both dumb warnings: eventual smut. probably won't use "y/n" very much. specifics and other warnings will be added each part. status: ongoing

Everyone in Levi's life knows he only ever dated one girl and that she left him wrecked, bitter, and heartbroken. Many years later, she's back in his life and he doesn't know what to do.

CHAPTERS

1: windex and baking soda (7.1k words) 2: wedding invitations (8.6k words) 3: ten things i hate about you (7.4k words) 4: earl grey (7.1k words) 5: paradis city (7.1k words) 6: busy nights (6.6k words)

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© levisolace. please do not copy, translate, claim any of my works. my works are cross-posted only on my ao3 account. thank you.

[1] Expendable Hearts (Levi x F!Reader)

Chapter 1: Windex and Baking Soda

WC: 7,182 Chapter Warnings: slight angst Summary: Everyone in Levi's life knows he only ever dated one girl and that she left him wrecked, bitter, and heartbroken. Many years later, she's back in his life and he doesn't know what to do. story masterlist > next chapter

“It’s always my pleasure, Mr. Brown.”

The corporate smile on your face drops as soon as you hit the end button in the video call application on your laptop. It was the first meeting of the day with a client and you were already exhausted, wanting nothing but to go home and curl up in bed, heavily surrounded by your pillows and weighted blanket for hours. But you know that’s a dream that would remain a fantasy for a while. Why? Because it’s a Monday. It’s only the start of the week and judging from the pile of paperwork delivered to your desk this morning, you would have to work overtime again for the third week in a row. 

Being recently hired by one of the top leading firms in the country is a blessing you will be thankful for every day but as the week goes by and you’re on your fifth pile of paperwork, more than ten meetings in one week, you can’t help but think what would it be like to work for a small, quiet firm. You shrug those thoughts away as soon as they come. You’re grateful for the more-than-average salary the firm provides, at least.

The day went on as it always does: hours of you trying to ignore your back pain. It was becoming unbearable and you can’t even use the ointments your grandmother used to insist you use because it would no doubt infest the building with its smell—your reputation and first impression from your coworkers is at stake. 

As you’re typing back an email from your superior, Atty. Dot Pixis, you halt when you feel the buzzing on your table. You pick it up mindlessly, checking to see the notification. A smile spreads on your face to see that it’s your previous boss, Vanessa. 

hey. how’s working with the big leagues?? pixis is not tiring you out too much is he?? i can give him a word if you want.

pixis is treating me really well, nes. thank u for checking up on me! i miss everyone there at the firm and little ian :(( 

Vanessa, besides being your former boss back in Olsen & Associates, is also your friend and self-proclaimed older sister. She's a well-known attorney, and Olsen is a legend back in law school because she’s an alumnus who’s actually cool and doesn’t have their head up their asses. However, after deciding to settle down and start a family, she opened up a small firm in her hometown. 

i might just have to visit bc i miss my little sis :(( should’ve never let u leave

technically, it’s your fault i left 

i know :( don't remind me

Two months ago, Vanessa told you that ODM is hiring and Pixis contacted her to see if she knows anyone to take the job. Your jaw dropped to the ground when she told you she recommended you and you can send in your resume if you’re interested. It was an offer no one could pass up so before you knew it, you were being hauled into a hours-long bus ride and then anxiously seated for an interview in the city you used to live in. And after about a week of being a nervous wreck waiting for their response, you were contacted that you’ve been selected for the position.

Now here you are, finally settled in your office. You still can’t believe you have your own space in this huge building. You would’ve never thought you’d be working here in the firm you only used to stare at in awe while passing by years ago. 

Although, you have to admit that you miss the warm feeling of the small firm where you all know each other, exchange heartfelt greetings, and gossip when there are not too many clients. Now, you pass by a new face every now and then, most not even bothering to greet you or spare you a look. You can’t blame them. The work here is drastic. 

By the time you left the office, it’s already dark and way past office hours. As you were driving home, you remembered you still needed a few supplies in your apartment. You haven’t exactly settled yourself in, prioritizing work more. God, you even still had a few boxes to unpack. 

You stopped by a 24-hour supermarket that you spotted on your way to work this morning when you had to reroute because of the traffic. It was a little out of the way but it would do. It was still two hours before midnight, anyway.

As you drag your feet through the aisles and drop whatever you felt like you needed in the cart, unwanted memories come creeping in. The air in Paradis City is still the same. Even if a few buildings might have changed or some stores you used to frequent have closed down, it was still the same Paradis you knew—a buzzing city filled with dreams. The streets are never empty, famously congested by students from top universities or office workers. 

When you got the offer for the job, you weighed out the pros and cons. There were only two cons you were able to determine:

You don’t want to leave Olsen & Associates and Vanessa’s hometown, Trost, and

You’d be going back to your hometown, the one you promised not to go back to. 

The pros outweigh the cons, obviously. That weight being the thick fat salary you would be getting. Besides, Paradis is huge and has like three million residents. It’s not like you’d cross paths with him. And it’s been years. He probably forgot all about you anyway. You barely think about him. It was just a silly puppy-love relationship. No biggie.

Keep telling yourself that.

Shut up. 

“That one’s better.”

A voice directed to you made you snap out of your thoughts. It made you painfully aware of how you had been staring at the two options of green tea in your hand for probably more than the normal minutes it takes one to decide. The tall brunette had on a face mask covering half his face, his hair parted in the middle, and he wore a simple light blue button-down and black slacks. He was about two feet away from you when he pointed at the tea canister in your right hand. 

“Oh. Thanks,” you replied sheepishly. Desperate to run away from the embarrassment of zoning out in the middle of a public space, you take his advice and put down the canister on your left hand back to the shelf. 

“You’re welcome. I see my friend drinking it all the time so it has to be good,” he nods and you see his cheeks prop up, probably sporting a smile beneath the mask. You smiled back and thanked him again.

“Can you grab that one for me?” He points at a sweet one, a flavor in contrast with the green tea you chose. It was on the shelf being blocked by your cart beside you. You quickly mutter an apology and reach for a can. 

“My fiancée prefers her tea fruity,” he explains even if you didn’t ask, his ears tinted a bit red from his own statement. You immediately find it endearing. He seems very fond of his partner as he continues to babble about her. “Well actually, she prefers coffee with an unhealthy amount of espresso shots but I eventually persuaded her to drink tea once in a while.” 

“Moby! I know we usually don’t get this brand but guess what? This has a free pink sponge!” 

You freeze at the sound of that awfully loud and familiar cheerful voice heading towards you at a fast pace. You couldn’t turn your head. Your fingers unconsciously grip the can you’re holding harshly with wide eyes. Silently, you were wishing that the person just had the same voice as the crazed tall woman with glasses you used to know or the man beside you isn’t named ‘Moby.’ The former would hardly be the case because from the sound of the voice, the personality of being uncaring of the silent atmosphere of the supermarket, and the way she ran excitedly from your peripheral vision, you were sure that this person was your old friend Hange. For the latter, your last hope dies down as you see the stranger turn his head at the sound of his name and reply with a sigh.

“What the hell are you gonna do with a sponge, babe? We have lots of sponges.”

“Okay but imagine! We swap out Levi’s sponge with a pink one.” 

“I don’t think Levi cares about the color as long as it cleans.”

The fight or flight response in you went crazy at the mention of the name you haven’t heard in years, heavily leaning on the former. You could just hand this guy named Moby’s tea and make a run for it. You doubt Hange would care while being heavily invested in her free pink sponge. 

But why would you run? You only run when you’re scared or did something wrong. Which is it? It can't be the latter, right? 

I did. 

Oh? So you did. You’re scared, huh? That she’d get angry at you for what you did back then. 

I am. 

Run then. That’s all you know to do anyway.

Shut up. Leave me alone. 

“Miss? Are you okay?” 

For the second time in front of the same stranger, you were snapped out of your trance and find yourself gripping the can so hard that you think you’ve made a light dent on the can. Damn, you should really get a decent amount of sleep. You’ve been losing it a lot lately. 

You shake your head and slap your cheek lightly with your free hand. “Sorry. Lack of sleep. I’m fine. Here.” 

You turn to him and hand him the can, hoping he wouldn’t mind the barely noticeable dent you made. Purposely, you don’t stray your eyes away from the man. You don’t want to be the first person to acknowledge Hange. Maybe she doesn’t even remember you. Maybe she doesn’t even want to acknowledge you. 

“Greenie?” 

It was more of a mutter. But with how loud Hanji’s voice is, you and Moby clearly heard it. 

That’s when you look at her and actually see her. She looks the same as you saw her last. Her brown hair was tied up in a ponytail and her brown eyes were covered by thick-rimmed glasses. Nothing much has changed from her appearance except for the disappearance of the youthful look now replaced by maturity. Her gaze is fixed on you, slack-jawed. Her reaction doesn’t surprise or faze you, having expected that much. It’s what would follow that you’re nervous about. What would she say? Will she get angry at you? Or will she even remember who you are? Somehow, you dread that last possible outcome worst. 

“H-Hange,” you breathily let out. You wonder if it’s audible. 

Her fiancé also looks shocked, staring at you and then back to Hanji with widened eyes. “This is Greenie? The Greenie?” He points at you while asking Hange who was still frozen. His tone and reference to you immediately tell you that you have been discussed with people you never met, no doubt now knowing your past with them. 

Greenie. You haven’t heard that nickname in a while. 

It was silent for a few seconds, eyes not straying from each other. You probably look apologetic—scared, even. The man beside her is waiting too. You think he’s having a mini breakdown in disbelief. 

When you see her start to lunge at you, you shut your eyes, expecting her palm to collide with your cheek. You expect her to slap you and scream at you in the middle of the cold supermarket. You expect her to ask you where you got the nerve to come back to the city after all you’ve done. 

Instead, what she did broke down all your expectations. 

Long and slender arms wrap around your figure, pulling you tightly to her chest. Your face is squished against the fabric of her fluffy parka jacket. Even if you suddenly have trouble breathing with how tight her hug is, you were thankful that it covered your face and how you were biting your lower lip, trying to suppress the relief that comes with tears.

“Where the hell have you been?!”

You couldn’t even answer. Or move at all. Not that you even know what to say. 

“Hange. You’re killing her.” You hear her partner say. Hange instantly loosens her grip on you, muttering an apology with a slight chuckle. When she looks down at you, you give her a gentle smile.

“I missed you too, Hange.” And you meant it. 

The tall woman was still not letting you go, arms wrapped just below your shoulders because of the height difference. Even if you were caged in her arms, you can still tilt your head up to look at her. Suddenly, tears started streaming down her face as she tilts her head down to you, her mouth quivering. Then it turns into full-on sobbing. You chuckle as she starts swaying you with her, going side to side like a pendulum as she sobs while wailing your name repeatedly. 

There was no stopping Hange when she gets like this. So you let it happen. You let her hug you like she did many times before. You relish the moment, wanting to pass out and let loose in her hold. Maybe you’re dreaming and you’ll wake up in your bed, filled with disappointment and yearning for some warmth.

When she was satisfied, she let you go and introduced you to Moblit, her fiancé and coworker. They walked with you as you continued to shop, telling you stories about her and Moblit. Thankfully for your sake, she didn’t ask you much about yourself or what happened when you were away. She just asked how you were doing right now and what you were doing in the city. Although you were scared that the news would get to him, you told her the truth that you recently got hired at the law firm. 

“So you moved back then? Like permanently?” Her brows raised in excitement. 

“Well, I have a temporary contract for six months before I’m permanently employed there so hopefully,” you shrug while heading to checkout. As expected, Hange doesn’t care that you practically explained that it’s technically a ‘not yet,’ she shrieks and jumps up and down anyway. 

“Oh my god, this is perfect! Greenie, one of my bridesmaids had to back out but we already had the dress paid and it’s a no-refund. Can you step in for her and attend our wedding? Would you? Please? Please?” Hange begs you, hands clasped together as she stares at you with puppy eyes and a pout. 

You stop in your tracks and feel your heart sink to the ground. She wants you to attend her wedding knowing that many, if not everyone, you used to know will be there. And if his name was so casually mentioned earlier, that meant that they were still very much best friends and he would definitely be there.

And a few minutes ago you were convincing yourself that you wouldn’t accidentally run into him in this city. Now, you have to actually see him and be in the same room for a few hours? 

You start with a chuckle. “Oh. I wouldn’t mean to impose—” 

You were abruptly overpowered by her loud negation. “No, you wouldn’t! Everyone would be ecstatic to see you! I swear.” 

“But—“

Hange sighs dramatically, shoulders slumping with a pout on her face. “I guess it’d be too much, wouldn’t it? You’re probably busy, right? Right. Sorry, I just got excited.” She turns to her boyfriend. “Moby, can you pay for our stuff and Greenie’s too?” 

“What?”

Your eyes widened but before you could protest or take a strong hold on your cart, Moblit was already dragging it away and sending a flying kiss to Hange who giggled like a schoolgirl to catch it with her fist. You turn to her in disbelief as he turns his back. She catches your face, knowing what you’re about to say. 

“It’s fine. That won’t make a dent in his bank account.”

Just like that, you were painfully reminded how no one could get a word in with Hange. 

“Un-fucking-believeable.” 

Niccolo, the training chef, flinched from behind him when the silver-eyed man let out an unprovoked profanity as he entered the restaurant. Connie, his loyal secretary, doesn’t even bat an eye at the unprofessional behavior of his boss, only following behind him with a straight face. 

“Shithead. Call Nile later. Tell him I want a new team on this…” his words halt in disgust as he sees the unfinished, poorly done walls of what was to be a new branch of Kuchel’s. “or I’ll fire his stupid construction company out of every damn project. Verbatim.” 

“Will do, sir.” Connie nods, mentally sighing. Not only is he used to hearing the profanities, but he’s also used to being ordered to say it too. 

Levi nods at his secretary’s response, eager to leave the abomination that was supposed to be at 80% progress at this date. As he turns, he’s faced with Connie and a blonde man he doesn’t know. 

“Who’s this?” 

The blonde man practically shivered at his haze, the corner of his lips twitching at the sides. It was a sad attempt at a smile. Mentally, Connie sighed at his boss’ unfocused mind when there was something that greatly irritates him. The trainee chef was just literally in the car with them and Levi told Connie to bring the chef with them on the way to check the new location. 

“This is Niccolo, sir. He was in the car with us. He’s the one highly considered by the HR,” Connie expertly answered. 

“So you’re on the last stage,” Levi addresses Niccolo. The nervous man gulps but answers. “Yes, sir.” 

Connie watches the exchange, feeling a bit of pity for the tall man cowering at the gaze of such a short guy with a temper taller than a skyscraper. He was exactly like this when Levi interviewed him for the position. 

“Sorry, I had to make a detour because some shitheads can’t do their job right. Let’s go.” 

And so Niccolo and Connie followed the grumpy man back to the vehicle they just got not even three minutes ago. 

Not that he knew what to expect or had guesses but Niccolo was utterly surprised that he was brought to the first Kuchel’s restaurant. The legendary one that went viral. 

When he passed by the reception area, his eyes widened when he saw the reservation list filled with no spots left. It was practically booked for the month from what he saw. 

The kitchen smelled amazing, each one of the cooks was busy and they actually looked happy while working. They worked with so much coordination and laughter like he had never seen before. 

He thought that he’d train or cook with them today, seeing as they’re Kuchel’s main branch’s team. He was excited too. But again, Levi surprises him when he pushes another door open from the kitchen, revealing a staircase. The man says nothing but climbs upstairs. 

Confused but too scared to ask, Niccolo only stares at Connie but who beckons him to follow him up the stairs. When he sees Levi take a glance behind him, his feet move on its own, following the cold short man’s steps.

He sees a living room first. It’s a simple home but maintained well enough to look pristine. He kept on following Levi as he eventually led him to a kitchen. Levi turned to him and he’d be lying if he said that his heart didn’t jump at his sudden order. 

“Do whatever you like. You have an hour.” 

And then he leaves the kitchen, leaving Niccolo confused as he looks around at the domestic kitchen. He sees Connie, Levi’s assistant aggressively mouthing the words ‘cook anything’ as he follows Levi back to the living room. 

“Good job. I think he liked it.” 

Connie whispers to Niccolo before he leaves. Normally, he isn’t allowed to tell the training chefs what Levi thinks. But he’s feeling a little silly and Niccolo is his friend and his best friend, Sasha’s, boyfriend. 

Just like all the other training chefs, Levi brought Niccolo to his old home to cook something for him. Levi is hella picky with them but Connie could see that he actually liked his friend’s food. There was no pursing of lips, which was the worst of them all. Connie had to scramble and get the trainee out before he burst the room into a myriad of colorful words no one wants to hear. 

When they got back to the office, Hange was already there and most probably uninvited. 

“What the fuck are you doing here, four eyes?” 

Levi’s eyes were seething with annoyance as he sees his friend sitting at his desk on his chair, spinning around like an idiot. It was hard to believe that this woman is a professor at one of the most prestigious universities in the country. 

“Shorty! You’re here!” She exclaimed, slamming her hands down on the fine wood of Levi’s desk to stop the chair from spinning. 

“Get the fuck up before I strangle you to death, Hange.” 

Hange chuckles but stands up anyway, skipping before plopping herself on the couch in Levi’s office. “Can you relax? I was just here to remind you that I’m getting married.” 

Levi groans and rolls his eyes. “Who would fucking forget, Hange? You text a fucking countdown at seven in the morning in the group chat tagged to everyone. The mute option has been fucking useless since you learned how to do it.” 

Levi sits down on his chair and switches on his computer to return to work despite his friend’s unsolicited visit to his office. 

“Oh! I wanted to ask you something too! Do you have a date for the wedding? So I can take note of a plus one, maybe?” 

He gives a blank stare to his friend for a second before turning back to his screen. “You know you can ask me that through a phone call, right?” He began typing away on his laptop, answering a few emails Connie forwarded to him. 

“Well, you blocked my number so I thought that you’d rather see me in person.” Hange shrugs with a grin.

Levi pauses, remembering that he did block Hange’s number that one night she insisted for he come over and watch a horror movie with Erwin and Moblit. He was working and couldn’t turn his phone on do not disturb mode so he had to specifically block Hange’s calls. He then proceeds to forget to unblock her until now. 

“So, no date?” Hange presses further. 

Levi grunts, annoyed at the stupid question. “Who the fuck am I gonna bring? It’s not like I’m gonna bring a random girl to your wedding, Hange.” 

“You totally could. They’re called escorts,” Hange suggests like a know-it-all.

“I don’t want a random stranger in your wedding pictures, four eyes.” 

“I would rather have that than see you so depressing in my pictures with your bitch face. Oh! Want me to set you up on a blind date?” Hange’s voice rises again, something that happens when she gets excited over an idea. 

“Fuck no,” Levi spat. 

“Your last serious relationship was decades ago, Levi. Give it a try again.” 

If looks could kill, funeral flowers would be thrown at Hange’s casket instead of wedding flowers. His fingers hover over the keyboard, hanging frozen at her words. At the mere implication of you, his blood boils and his chest tightens. 

“What does that have to do with anything?” 

“Well–”

“Are you saying I’m not over her again, Hange?” 

Before she could answer, the door swung open, revealing a tall blonde man with thick eyebrows who was grinning cheek to cheek. Great. Erwin’s here. Maybe they could send a few more uninvited people, order greasy pizza, and have a party in his office. 

“Over who?” Erwin asks, ever the gossip man. Levi grunts and rests his forehead in his palms as Hange greets Erwin enthusiastically before answering.

“You know who.”

Erwin narrows his eyes at Levi before sitting down on the other edge of the couch. Hange tells him about getting a blind date. “You could try, Hange. I’ve set him up with surprise blind dates before and you know how that went.” 

“Can you two fucking shut up and leave? I’m trying to work here,” Levi spat in annoyance. The pair ignores his grumbling, carrying on their conversation like he wasn’t in the room.

“But I have never set him up with someone before,” Hange points out. 

Erwin purses his lips. “I doubt that you can find a girl better than me, Hange. I tried everything.” 

Erwin and Hange look at each other with mischief, clearly enjoying Levi’s suffering from their teasing. He knows they won’t stop. If anything, it only egged them on further.

Hange places a finger on her chin obnoxiously. “Maybe you could ask the girl to wear green next time.” 

Erwin nods, crossing his arms like he’s actually considering it. “Absolutely. We all know Levi still loves his greenie.” 

God, even her nickname is a pain to hear. 

Levi slams a hand down his mahogany desk so loud that people outside his office probably heard it. It didn’t faze his friends who were snickering on the couch though. They know he’s about to blow. He’s so frustrated that he almost ran a finger through his well-kept hair but caught himself before damaging it, exhaling loudly in frustration before speaking. 

“Look, you dipshits. I told you a thousand times. Forget about that damned woman. I’m not dating because I’m goddamn busy with all these expansions, not because I’m not over a girl who left us all without a fucking trace.” Every word is laced with venom and he ends it with a huff. 

“Fine. We get it. You’re over her but you’re still angry at her.” Hange rolls her eyes. 

Levi doesn’t know exactly when they started referring to her as mere stories or inside jokes. But evidently, it turned out that way. They used to be hurt at the thought of her disappearing. Slowly, they started to forget. Except him. He’s still angry and confused when he thinks of a reason why. 

“I am,” he admits.

“And if she comes to see you again? What will you do?” 

This question again, Levi thinks. 

He sighs. Like an automated machine, he answers the question as he did a myriad of times before, the first being the answer to one of your stupid games of what-if questions when you were together. Most were just ways to make him say those damn three words to you. It was usually just dumb things like “What if I was a worm?” and he would roll his eyes and tell you that he would unhesitatingly kill you before kissing you when you frown in disappointment. One question, however, deeply offended him more than anything. 

“Levi, what if I asked you to break up with me?” 

You were sitting on the couch with a blanket draped over your legs, still reeling from the sad romantic movie the two of you watched where the disabled paralyzed man still decides to die even after he fell in love with his caregiver. 

Levi, who’s in the middle of choosing another movie from your collection of DVDs, freezes in his seat. He doesn’t turn to look at you but you see his whole body tensed up having heard what you said.

“What if we break up like that?” 

You repeat the question with a pout on your lips. Levi finally looks at you with a frown on his face. He sighs and looks away, gaze lifting up for a second as if he’s thinking. 

“No,” he answers even if the question upsets him. “We’re not gonna break up.”

You noticed that his mood falters from your question.  Feeling a little bad, you wrap a hand around his bicep, pulling yourself close to his side. With a smile, you lean in and give him a peck on the cheek. “Don’t be sad. It was just hypothetical.”

He instantly leans unto you. He always does so when you’re near—like opposite sides of a magnet being pulled together by force. He always wants to be near you.

“Can you just go back to stupid questions like the worm shit?” He asks with a low voice, faces too close to each other that his lips could brush yours. 

You give him a teasing grin and hum, nodding but doing the exact opposite of what he asked. Ever his stubborn girl, you continue asking. “But what if I leave you?” 

He glares at you, not very pained this time, knowing it’s just you teasing again. Instead, his brows furrowed as he gazed down at you with his silver eyes. His eyes flick down to your lips and his lower lip brushes against yours for a millisecond. When you were sure he was about to kiss you, he shoves a hand at your face and pushes you away with a little force, making you land on the couch on your back. 

You laugh but curse him out loud for his attack. Levi huffs, crossing his arms and looking away. 

“If you do that, I will ignore you for the rest of my fucking life. You’re dead to me.” He says it with so much conviction that you know he doesn’t mean a word of it. 

You sit up again, frowning then lightly slapping his shoulder. “That’s rude. What if I come back to see you, then?” 

He scoffs loudly, still looking away from you, and spots his box of cleaning supplies. Then, he says the second thing that comes into his mind, thinking that the first one he thought of would seem desperate and pathetic of him. 

He opens his mouth to speak and the words you hear from him causes an ever louder laugh out of you. He smiles before pushing you on your back again. This time, pulling himself on top of you and sealing your lips with a kiss. 

“I’d spray her with some fucking Windex, throw baking soda on her stupid face, and kick her out.” 

Usually, the statement is so funny to them that it ends the conversation. Sometimes, he even gives them a demonstration where one of their unlucky friends gets to be on the receiving end. But this time, Erwin has a follow-up question that goes straight to Levi’s chest.

“And if she insists on staying? What will you do?” 

Levi went quiet. Hange and Erwin give a knowing sad look at each other that Levi doesn’t catch. They didn’t mean to push him this hard. But they had to know if he was ready. 

From just outside his door where Connie’s desk is placed, his secretary listens in as well. He heard about his boss’ ex. The whole office knows about it. His mysterious ex and the only woman Levi Ackerman loved. That was what everyone knew. But from spending too much time with his boss more than he wanted to, Connie had learned the following about his boss’ only relationship:

Her nickname is Greenie because she liked green tea. Levi prefers black tea but he accidentally told you he liked green tea too then ran with it for four months until Hanji revealed the truth accidentally.

The four of them knew each other for a long time. He doesn’t know if they met in high school or college. But in school, definitely.

After getting their undergraduate degree, she asked Levi to break up and broke his heart with words.

After the breakup, she disappeared from Paradis. Levi waited for her for a long time, broken and yearning. She didn’t come back. Now, all Levi has is bitterness in his body.

Those are what Connie gathered from his little detective skills to cope with having to work under the horribly mannered man. Then, he shares it with his best friend, Sasha, during his lunch break. 

He listens a little more, the email he was reading sitting idle for longer than it should. His boss still doesn’t answer. 

Inside, Erwin and Hange await their friend’s reply who is still lost in his own thoughts. Erwin decides to push him one last time. He clasped his hands together and leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees. 

“If she comes to you for closure, will you accept it? You’re over her, right? You can stay angry, that’s valid. She did you wrong. But will you at least hear her?” 

Levi keeps quiet but listens to Erwin. The word closure gives his stomach an unsettling feeling. It felt wrong to hear it. But it doesn’t matter. His friends were just bored and bluffing again. He can bluff too. 

“I don’t really care about her as much as you think I still do. When I see her, I’ll do what I said I would. Then it’s done. I don’t care what she does anymore.” 

It’s been five days since you coincidentally met Hange and Moblit. Before you parted ways, you exchanged numbers and your old friend has been messaging you nonstop. You appreciated it. Hange was always light-hearted and kind. You’re glad she found someone who appreciates her and takes care of her. So when she mentioned that there was a conflict with the invitations, you offered to fix it for her, knowing a thing or two about it. You handled project management a few times as an intern. 

There was once a time when you called her your best friend. You know that’s a title you no longer hold but either way, you were glad to talk to her again. Even if you know that in the very near future, you would have to face what it holds for you. Now that Hange is back in your life, it’s only a matter of time and you’d have to see your ex again. You lie awake at night thinking of what you’d do then. 

It was Saturday. That means no work for you after lunch, thankfully. You ground through your paper works and clients like a corporate machine all week, wanting to finish them before Saturday so you wouldn’t have to go overtime on a weekend. And after about nine cups of highly caffeinated green tea, you finally finished all your work for the week. Now free from the shackles of labor and capitalism, you slung your tote bag over your shoulder and headed out of your office and onto the elevator. 

Passing by Pixis’ office, you inform him you’re taking your leave which he cheerfully allowed, wishing you a happy weekend before you left his office. You bid him to have the same and left the building, anxious to see through the next events of the day. If this was a normal weekend, you’d be content with wasting away in bed as soon as you rushed home. 

You handled the invitations over the week, using your break time to oversee how it’s going with the printing service you trust for things like this. They generously accepted your request for a rush order, knowing who you are. 

The invitations were piled into a box on your coffee table by Friday, ready to be sent out to Hange’s guests. When you texted Hange that they were ready, she sent over her apartment’s address, telling you to personally meet her there on Saturday after work. She argues when you tell her you can just send it in the same day through an app, whining about how she wants to hang out with you. 

Hange, ever the persuasive and persistent person, got you to agree. That, and you still feel guilty for declining her invitation to her wedding. 

After you press the doorbell, you wait patiently with your left hand holding the small box of invitations. Her apartment was apparently a penthouse. An apartment in this building already costs an arm and a leg. Hange is smart and talented, one of her research must’ve been really successful. You also remembered that she was probably living with Moblit here. Ah, the wonders of having a partner in life—shared rent. Maybe you should get a roommate. 

When the door was taking too long to be answered, you shoot up a text for Hange. 

hey i’m here outside ur door ! :)) 

ok! just wAit a bit

It didn’t take Hange long to reply, easing your anxiety a little. When it takes more than a minute after she sends her text, you tilt your head in confusion. Are you at the correct address? Maybe you’re at the wrong unit. You were pretty sure you were on the right one, though. You rechecked it a few times. 

You wait a little bit more before ringing the doorbell again. You assume she’s probably grossed into something and can’t take the door at the moment. With a sigh, you wait a few more minutes, turning away from the door and deciding to scroll through your social media accounts that you barely use. 

A smile involuntarily plasters itself on your face when you see the posts of your coworkers from Trost. Warmth spreads to your chest as you see the office through the pictures, reminiscing your time there. It’s suddenly frightening, the realization that you’re alone in this huge city with no one to turn to. It’s a feeling you’re awfully familiar with, a state you’d rather not return to. 

When you feel yourself drift away to those thoughts, you pull yourself away immediately, figuring that the time you waited should be enough to press the doorbell again. 

But as you turn around to press it for the second time, the door swings open harshly in a swift motion, making you jump a little in surprise and fear as you hear an annoyed groan from a man that is most definitely not Hange coming with it. 

“For fuck’s sake. Did Hange give a woman my addre…”

The two of you froze. 

The raven-dark hair parted in the middle. The undercut. Those gray eyes and his beautiful piercing gaze. Those high cheekbones and soft cheeks. Those furrowed brows and scrunched forehead that was softly dissipated from his face when he sees you standing behind the door. Those delicate pink lips, now parted in awe and mirroring yours.

Neither of you can move like you were frozen in time. Every muscle in your body refused to move. Your brain stopped functioning and wasn't even able to conjure a coherent thought, much less a response. The only thing you could do was stare at the man you once called home. 

He still had dark under eyes but they were more prominent than before. You hate how it still suited him even if you hated how little he sleeps; they make his gaze heavier, willing you to get lost with him. A few strands of his fringe fall over his eyes. They were a little longer than what you were used to but it was still the same haircut you used to run your hand over when you were cuddling. It was a little unkempt. And even though his white shirt is a little crumpled, it still smoothly falls over his frame. It drapes from his defined shoulders to his waist until the hem of the shirt goes over the band of his gray sweatpants that hugged his legs loosely. 

He breaks the gaze spell when his eyes go over you, top to bottom. He stares at your shocked and devastated countenance, the casual but decent clothes that you changed into after work, the box in your hand, and the way your right foot has stepped further back than your left when he opened the door, ready to run away at the thought the man who opened the door was angry. 

You open your mouth to speak. You know you have to say something. Anything. Hi? Hello? How are you? Is this where Hange lives? Why the fuck do you still look so hot? 

But none of that comes out.

Why? 

Levi’s face hardens before you can speak, wiping off the bewildered eyes and replacing them with his infamous glare, silver eyes glistening with specks of anger. His mouth closes into a frown but not before scoffing at you. The scorned expression on his face shuts you right up for a second but you try and carry on.

This time, before you can speak, he slams the door shut in your face with an impact so loud it booms through your whole being enough to raise all the hair on your skin, leaving you standing there in his floor’s corridor appalled and deeply belittled.

Your startled brain is more confused than ever. As you decide to slowly process what happened and not even ten seconds after he harshly shuts his door, it swings open again, revealing the same man who not-so-gently shut it, with a hand still on the knob and the other holding something blue.

His arm outstretched towards you and you were faced with a nozzle of a familiar spray bottle. With a straight face, he sprays the fucking liquid right on your face. You immediately shut your eyes and mouth, leaning your face away from the spray. Although it’s far enough to not cover your face if you hadn’t moved, you still cringe when you feel the tiny droplets on your skin.

You lift one eye open, scared that he’s about to spray again. He puts the bottle down to his side, looking satisfied with his work. When you open both eyes, he shuts the door again, leaving you in the corridor with heightened emotions from the first time he did it paired with an itching aggravation. 

Was that a fucking Windex? 

Hold on. Windex? 

The door swings open again and he fully reveals himself without a hand on the knob like the two times before. This time he’s holding an orange cardboard box labeled Pure Baking Soda and reaches into it with his other hand. 

You shut your eyes close immediately, realizing what was happening when you remembered his words to you years ago. 

“I’d spray you with some fucking Windex, throw baking soda on your face, and kick you out.” 

The baking soda hits your face, making your nose involuntarily scrunch up because of the fistful of powder he threw at you. When you guess that he’s satisfied after successfully throwing you the promised baking soda, you blink your eyes open, finding him still standing there with a straight face. 

“Are you done?” you asked with a deadpan face, covered with baking soda.

© levisolace. please do not copy, translate, claim any of my works. my works are cross-posted only on my ao3 account. thank you.

it'll pass.

pairing: levi ackerman x gn!reader summary: a drabble of that fleabag scene but in levi's version wc: 1,826 genre: major angst warnings: fleabag (tv) and aot spoilers obvi a/n: i was in my feelings sorry

“I love you.”

You know it wouldn’t end well.

You told yourself a million times, “Don’t expect. It will lessen the disappointment.” But as you sit there, side by side, shoulder to shoulder, and knees almost touching, with the one you need like water, there are no more expectations to break. It’s done. You’ve said it. You’ve let out those words that prick like thorns at the back of your throat, aching to be said longer than you can admit. Now, it hangs dead in the air, waiting to be caught—to be answered.

From the small distance between you, you can see his steel eyes glisten under the moonlight. You can see the dark lines under his eyes and the creases on his forehead. Life hasn’t been kind to the man you love. It never was to anyone. But if you could change one person’s fate, it would be his. You don’t know the extent of what you would give to lighten the load in his heart. You would give anything to have him smile, to have him laugh, and to have him live, that was your wish.

And yet, you know that by having done this, you’ve burdened his heart more.

His eyes bore into yours, a million words settling into his irises. Just like that, you were back to where it all started.

It started at stolen glances, cheeks heating up whenever his eyes meet yours. You tried to avoid his gaze, pulling yourself out of the trance it would give you. You wanted to get lost in them. But you know that having an eye for the Survey Corps soldier was a stupid idea.

There were things much bigger than the both of you, things that only he could do. Levi Ackerman is humanity’s strongest soldier. One of Commander Erwin’s greatest gambles in the war against the Titans. There was no room for you in it, a normal resident of Sina. You know that the expected fate for you is to accept a marriage from someone who can stay with you as long as you can live inside these walls while relying and waiting on the scouts’ mission to maybe end the suffering of the people in these walls. It’s what was taught to you for years. But as always, you weren’t one to listen.

You couldn’t help it. You couldn’t help but to shop on your own in the markets when you can have servants do it for you. You couldn’t help but to talk to the people there, asking them what new things they could offer you every time you were around. You couldn’t help but try out every new food and beverage you could find.

You couldn’t help but notice the timid and quiet man buying tea every third Sunday of the month. He would be there exactly at the time you first saw him and you would wait to see him, not even talk or be near him. You just want to see his face. He always looks tired. There were creases on his forehead that always seemed to be scrunched. His lips were either turned down into a frown or a straight line. Although he looked very neat with his long-sleeved white button and black slacks, his clothes don't seem to be of noble or great wealth. He doesn’t seem to be a servant or one of the workers from Rose.

He orders the same black tea every Sunday. The same one your father drinks every morning. It was rare and expensive, something about it being grown on a small plot of land protected here in Sina. You’ve tried it once out of curiosity but was not very fond of it. It was too bitter for your liking. But nonetheless, you thought that if the mysterious man had enough to spare for one canister of it a month, he must have enough of an income.

Eventually, he notices your stolen glances and thought you were suspicious. He cornered you in an alley one time on the way to the markets, having expected you to be there already. In fear and fluster that the man was finally in close distance, you sputtered out your apologies and told him the truth that you only found yourself being curious about him. He warned you not to do it again. You could only meekly answer an agreement.

In anticipation for the next time he came, you were fully prepared to offer another apology. Your next interaction would have to be better that time around, you thought as you have already carefully gone about your words and have been holding a canister of the same black tea he prefers. Unfortunately, he didn’t come by the next month. Still, you waited.

The month after that as you wait, it was running a bit late, and when you were convinced that you have officially run the man away from this market, you finally caught sight of the man you have been waiting for. He had the same tired expression on his youthful face, the same haircut that always seemed to be trimmed at the perfect length, and the same grey cold eyes. Except, this time, he wears a military uniform with an insignia you don’t see much on these walls—the wings of freedom.

You froze where you stood, just near the pop-up teashop. You see that someone strides closely behind him, towering over him with his upright posture and blonde hair. Of course, you know who that is. That’s Erwin Smith, the commander of the Survey Corps. People thought him to be the devil commander, ruthless and ambitious. And beside him is the man you’ve been following every month, a member of the military division that gets sent to their deaths every expedition.

But still, you approached them with a smile and introduced yourself. Erwin gives you Levi a glance after, one that you couldn’t interpret the meaning of. At first, you thought that Erwin didn’t particularly enjoy your presence there. But he gave you a smile and even pushed the smaller man in your direction. He even gave you a wink behind his back.

Since then, Levi, a wonderful name for a breathtaking man like him, continued to come back every month.

And here you are now, standing at the edge of a cliff from the pressure of accepting a marriage for convenience versus your feelings for the captain of the Survey Corps.

It was silent. Not even the sound of air whistling or the birds chirping can be heard in the dead of the night. You can only hear the sound of your heart beating. You can hear his heart in sync with his. You can feel his pulse as he closes a hand over yours. Not fast. Not slow. Perfectly balanced. His rough hands held your soft ones, caressing them with his thumb. Fond, caring, and comforting.

“It’s him, isn’t it?”

Carefully, he smiles. A painful one. If you knew that the first time you’d see him give you a smile like this, you would have never asked for it.

After spending a long time with Levi more than his monthly visits to Sina, you’ve come to learn more about him. You were his only friend outside the scouts and if he were to choose who he’s the closest with among them, you know he’d choose Erwin. He highly respects him and he told you how he vowed to follow the great commander to the darkness. And you know fully that what you’re asking of him will collide with Erwin’s decisions. He can’t be with you. He can’t love you.

Gently, two words come out of his mouth. “It’ll pass.”

They were not the three words you longed to hear. But you smiled back, holding back the tears with an accepting smile. He nods, smiling back as if he was convincing himself. It was there that you realized that he was saying it to himself more than to you.

There was another silence. But this time, it no longer holds the weight. And yet, you don’t feel any relief, no burden lifted, and no thorns plucked out of you. You could only feel his hand for comfort and you looked down on it once again, memorizing the veins on his skin as if it will be the last time you look at it. You trace your fingertips over them, blinking away the tears that seemed to fall without your consent. The blurriness in your sight that your tears caused is going against your purpose to capture his hand in your brain. You don’t want to forget him. Ever.

You would rather memorize his face and how he looked knowing one day, you might forget his face. But with his hand and the way he holds yours, you know that both your dreams and nightmares will be plagued by it. You want to see it. You want to remember how it felt to be loved like this—to be loved by him, even if he didn’t say it yet. You know. You always knew.

His forehead is close to yours and you can feel him trying his best not to make them touch, he’s hesitating—pulling away in fear that he might never want to break it. His lips are quivering and he draws them in tightly into a line to halt it.

You don’t know how long you sat there but somehow, Levi was able to pull away, mutter he has to leave, and stand up. He takes a few steps away from you before pausing, back turned on you.

You called his name, the ache in your chest intensifying as it rolled off your tongue.

“I’ll see you next Sunday.”

He turns around, the same pained expression on his face. The corner of his lips twitches up ever so slightly in amusement. Both of you know that things will never be the same again. You will never come to see him in the market and he will probably never come to buy tea personally again. But still, he nods and lets out an unexpected response to your statement.

“…I love you too.” It came out in a whisper but it was loud enough for you to hear. He looked into your eyes for a few more seconds before looking away entirely. Before he turned around, you see a single tear fall from his eye. You watch as he walked away until you could no longer see his form fade into the darkness.

It never passed. Not even as the truth about the Titans and the people outside was uncovered. Not even as you survived all that, somehow. Not even as you held your child from a man that wasn’t him, a gold ring adorning your finger. Not even as you saw him again, wounded, and being wheeled by two children. Not even as your eyes met his cold, gray one.

It never passed.

© levisolace. please do not copy, translate, claim any of my works. my works are cross-posted only on my ao3 account. thank you.

[2] Expendable Hearts (Levi x F!Reader)

Chapter 2: Wedding Invitations

WC: 8,654 Chapter Warnings: angst kinda ^^, reader and levi argue a lot Summary: Everyone in Levi's life knows he only ever dated one girl and that she left him wrecked, bitter, and heartbroken. Many years later, she's back in his life and he doesn't know what to do.

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The corner of his lips twitched, almost forming a smirk but it drops back into a frown in a millisecond enough for you to almost believe you may have hallucinated it. 

“I have to kick you out,” he answered smoothly.

You rolled your eyes, ignoring his sneering gaze, and tried to wipe your dusted face with your free hand while asking. “Does Hange live here?”

He inhales, exasperated as he leans on the door frame. “Why the fuck would Hange live in my place? Is she homeless?” 

You close your eyes for a moment again, trying to calm your excessively beating heart, repeatedly reminding yourself to have patience and just get away from here as soon as possible.

If there is one thing Levi knows to do, it’s to rile you up. You didn’t think they fell in love at first sight, did you? No. You completely annoyed the hell out of him. When you entered the room, you flirted with him because you simply found it astonishing. His ears get so red when you call him cute or profess your crush on him in front of everyone. You, if not Hange, were often the receiver of his deadly glares.

“I don’t fucking know? Maybe she fucking told me she lives here,” you reply, waving your phone in from of his face. 

He stares at the device in your hands. A phone from a high-end brand. Vanessa gave it to you as a gift recently. It’s the latest model they had. 

“Well, would you look at that? It looks like you have a phone,” he states the obvious, blankly staring at it before your words sink into him, making his brows perk up in curiosity. “Hold on. Did you say Hange texted you?” 

You trailed off, tilting your head in confusion. “Uh… yeah?” 

Levi goes quiet, then turns to toss the box of powder somewhere inside. He leaves the door open and is quickly facing you again. If you were to be asked, you’d say that a look of hurt flashed on his face. But what do you know? You may not know who he is anymore. A lot can change in a year, much less seven years. 

It was beginning to be uncomfortable, the silence that suddenly loomed between the two of you. Deciding enough is enough, you cleared your throat to catch his attention. 

“You know what? Maybe she made a mistake. I’ll go. We can just say you kicked me out if you want,” you suggest the last sentence before letting out a painfully awkward fake laugh. You turn on your heels, ready to erase the look of his face in your brain. 

As you step forward, fingers wrap around your elbow and before you know it, you are being pulled back to where you stood earlier. You turn your head to Levi with wide eyes, stumbling and losing your balance until another hand catches your hips, steadying you in place. 

Your breath gets stuck in your throat when you realize how close your face is to his, mere inches away from each other. His hardened gaze falters, an unreadable one stares into your eyes. From this short distance, the musky and pine-like scent fills your nose—the same smell you used to wake up to every day. His breath smells like the tea he drinks. His face is sharper but they remain soft. Even at this age, his features still look younger than he actually is. Levi has always been beautiful even with a permanent scowl on his face.  

One of the fingers still wrapped around your waist twitches and the movement sent you to hypersensitivity. You become too sensitive to how his hand curls on your arm, how the other grips your waist, and how your faces are too close for comfort—it becomes suffocating for reasons you don’t want to disclose to yourself. 

You tug yourself free of his hold, turning around and facing him. With a glare, you spat out with furrowed brows. “What the fuck is your problem?” 

His response was immediate, knocking you out of your breath.

“Stay.”

One word. One word and your anger dissipates. 

If you had decided to tie your hair, you’re sure he’d see the tips of your ear redden. You breathe out a soft but confused response. “What?” 

He shifts his gaze to the side, avoiding your eyes. A mannerism he does when he’s shy. “You can come in. Hange’s supposed to come today.” 

“Oh.” You peek behind him where you see a glimpse of his personal space. He wants you to enter his home alone with him? What would you even talk about? You don’t doubt it’d be awkward. Wait. He lives alone, right? Not that you should care. But still, if he has a partner, it’d be weird to have your ex-girlfriend in your home. 

“It’s fine. I could just wait for Hange in the lobby.” 

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he rolls his eyes. “Just come in.” 

“But—,” you try to protest again.

“Hange will drag you up here anyway. It’s a long way down.”

“It’s literally one elevator ride,” you point at the elevator behind you. 

Levi sighs, arms crossed in front of his chest again. This time, your eyes drift from the smooth pale skin of his forearms, his biceps, to the chest that they pressed onto, and you notice that his toned muscles are more defined than it was before. It’s not the first thing noticeable about him, but he always had a great physique. He takes care of his body well and is much stronger than he looks. You remember how he could easily tackle men twice his size, that man being your old friend, Erwin. Your gaze on him only passed for a second, careful not to let him notice your stare. 

“Fine. Suit yourself.” 

Nodding, you turn your back on him again, having already decided to reject his invitation to enter his home. You had even taken a few steps away and best believe you really would have gone to the lobby as you planned. You would’ve, really, if it wasn’t for you remembering the state of your face. 

Reluctantly, you spin on your heels. Facing him now with much more distance between you, you swallowed down the humiliation creeping into your face. He’s still standing there, straight-faced and watching you leave from his door frame.

“Levi.” 

Saying his name sent your head mildly spinning. It’s a name you were adamant about not thinking about, not seeing, and definitely not speaking. It’s been a long time of suppression that your brain has become hesitant to call for him that it comes out in a wavering voice. 

Let’s just leave that on the air for a second. His name. He’s here. In front of you. 

“What?” He presses when you hesitate to talk again. 

You sigh, shoulder slumping down in shame. “Do you have like… wet wipes or something?” 

Levi rolls his eyes and steps aside to give you some space for you to enter his home. 

“Just fucking come in.”

Knowing it’s probably the better option, you comply. It’s not like he’d murder you, right? At least, you think so. 

When you passed by him as you entered, you mumbled a quick word of gratitude. While he closed the door behind you, you took it upon yourself to remove your heels and put them on the shoe rack by the door without the need for him asking to. He still probably doesn’t appreciate outdoor shoes dirtying his floor. You still like it that way too. It’s just common etiquette, you both agreed to that before when it came up in a conversation. 

You notice he’s staring at your shoes on the rack in silence when you stand back up. Instantly, you ask if you made a mistake. “What is it? Are they not supposed to go there or something?” 

The question makes him look at you. He shakes his head. “It’s nothing,” he muttered and bent down to pull open a drawer from the chest beside the shoe rack. 

He pulls out something from it, unwrapped it, and hands it to you. You look down, seeing new gray slide slippers. “Wear it.” 

With a nod, you let it land on the floor beneath you. Slipping your feet in, you find that the slippers are very comfortable. They surprisingly fit just right, well, maybe a little larger but it was fine. They don’t seem to be one of those disposable slippers you get at hotels. Is he more of a clean freak now than before that he gives his guests brand-new slippers to walk around when visiting him? 

His apartment is decent and obviously expensive. The grand living room greets you after the small hallway, illuminated by the floor-to-ceiling glass windows that give you a great view of Paradis’ bustling urban jungle. Also, you don’t know what he needs three different couches for. Wait, is that a freaking massage chair? Holy shit, you need that for your stupid back. How many months of salary from ODM would that be? 

“You can put your things on the couch or the coffee table right there,” Levi instructs. You ignore the inkling to ask and tease which couch he’s talking about and gently put down your bag and the box of invitations on the coffee table next to the two couches adjacent to each other. 

You can’t help but be curious about his current career and that he’s living such a luxurious life. Granted, Levi had always been living well. But nothing quite like this. The man you knew from your past preferred to not live lavishly. 

The interior had a theme of white, black, and brown—mostly white for what you guess is a clean look. True to his character, there was no speck of dust anywhere. Everything is kept neat and clean. It almost seemed like no one was living here. 

When you look back at Levi, he’s at the end of a corridor beside what you assume is the dining area, pointing at the first door  

“The bathroom’s here. Just wash your filthy face or whatever.”

You roll your eyes, mumbling to yourself how the filth on your face was his doing before giving him a tight-lipped fake smile and entering the door he pointed to. 

When you shut the door behind you, you slam your back on the door. You close your eyes and sigh in relief. Fuck. Finally, you’re alone and can’t be seen by the onyx-haired man. What the hell is happening? You’re fucked. He’s obviously mad at you. 

It’s been seven years. He couldn’t possibly be that mad, right? Sure. You’re exes. It’s natural to not be on good terms. It’s only right that the two of you act like mature adults, right? 

Opening your eyes when you feel a little more calm, you face the mirror. Oh, you looked horrible . You looked like a baker who had too much fun with her flour. Some got to your hair too. Fuck. That’s it. You’re going to kill him.

You washed your face until you were satisfied, a bit upset that your light makeup had to be removed. Admittedly, you were more concerned with the fact that you’re going to face Levi barefaced than the wasted effort you’ve put in for the simple look, no matter how small. Partly because come on, you’re exes. It’s basically a rule (and a somewhat toxic one at that, you admit) to appear better than you’ve seen your ex last to make them see that you’re better off without them. It’s not that you want him to want you again or regret how things ended up between the two of you. You just don’t want to look like you’re not doing well, even to Hange and the others. But more so to him. The darkening bags under your eyes resulted from having not slept enough in months because of handling your new living arrangements and adjusting to your new job. You haven’t been eating much either, often forgetting meals when you’re too busy. The way you look isn’t really on your priority list. It hasn’t been for a long time. 

There was a mild skin cleanser on the sink that you hoped he wouldn’t mind you using. Well, he shouldn’t. It’s his fault that you have to wash your face. The surprise reunion with Levi alone was enough to make you insecure in multiple ways. It didn’t have to be worsened by you catching cleaning supplies in the face. 

Instead of looking for a spare towel, you used toilet paper to dab your face dry. The moment you felt refreshed enough and figure you’ve taken long enough before your host thinks you're locking yourself in his bathroom to avoid him, you come out and find him sitting on the couch with two cups of tea. One beside your things and the other in his hand in the unique way he does so, fingers holding the rim instead of the handle and using the space between his thumb and index finger to drink. 

He glances at you when he hears the door open but doesn’t say anything. Instead, he stares back out his glass window. Unsure of what to do next, you decide to sit on the other couch in front of the other tea. 

Again, silence wraps around the two of you.

You rub your hands on your jeans, looking around the living room subtly. Not that you were particularly interested in his interior design, it’s just easier to avoid his face even if he’s just staring out the window quietly. It’s so obvious that he’s not even in deep thought. He’s waiting for you to speak first. He’s not gonna be the one to do it. He’s waiting to see how you’ll play this out. 

What the fuck do you talk to him about? The weather? His comfortable guest slippers? The impending doom of capitalism and technology? Honestly, anything but the past. 

You take a deep breath. Fine. Whatever. Here we go. 

“How have you—,” you were interrupted before you could even finish the question. 

“I doubt you actually care how I’m doing but I’m good.” He says as he puts down his teacup on the table. 

Stunned. Astonished. That’s what you are right now. All that and he still doesn’t spare you a glance. But you’re aware that he’s observing your every move. That’s okay. You can try again. Patience. Kindness. You can see this through by being a civil, respectful citizen. 

You cleared your throat.

“You look—,” he finishes the sentence for you this time, having guessed what you were about to say. 

“It looks like you’re about to tell me I look good, which is dumb. I don’t need you to tell me that.” 

You blink repeatedly. 

Wow. He is much more of an asshole now, isn’t he? 

You can practically feel your blood starting to boil. This is starting to be fucking ridiculous. When is Hange coming? Is she even coming? Maybe you should text her and ask her why you’re in front of Levi and not her. Or maybe just beg her to get to his apartment at full speed?

“You’re supposed to meet with Hange today, right?” 

He finally looks at you. You look at him. And then you nod, preferring to stay quiet. 

“Must be important if you went all the way here after seven years for Hange,” he gathered in a sarcastic tone. 

If he thinks that, then Hange or Moblit hasn’t told him that you’re back in Paradis even if you didn’t tell her not to. You wonder why that is. Maybe they haven’t had the time? Maybe he hasn’t had the time? Nonetheless, you don’t know how to correct him. But something is telling you that you should.  

You rub the back of your neck, head tilting, unsure of what to say but you agree. “Well… I guess?” 

The invitations are kind of important, aren’t they? They’re kind of late too. These have to be sent out after this weekend. 

“Tch,” he sassed at your unsure response. 

And then it was silent again. 

In the midst of it, you contemplate if and how you’re going to break the news that you’re in Paradis for work and not solely for meeting Hange. You doubt he even cared about your life update. 

Before you can decide in your thoughts, his deep voice breaks the silence. 

“So… you’re getting married.” He spread his knees apart to lean forward and rest his elbows on his knees. 

Your shoulders tense up. A look of puzzlement crosses your face, unsure if you heard his words correctly. You lean an ear in his direction lightly and raise your voice. “I’m getting what ?” 

He raises a brow and gives you a look of contempt as if you’re lying to him. When you continue to give him a bewildered look, he taps the box you brought to the table with four fingers. You look down at the box confused, searching for any clue that leads to his conclusion that you were apparently tying the knot. 

Oh.

You ordered it so it was addressed to you. 

The box had your name and a description of ‘Wedding Invitations ’ on it. Did Levi think that you were getting married and went all the way here to invite Hange? Your lips part as you nod to yourself, understanding the situation that apparently transpired. 

When you look at Levi, he’s still waiting for an answer. You sigh and rub your temples, explaining calmly and slowly. “Levi, those are Hange’s wedding invitations.” 

His brows furrow. Now, it’s his turn to be confused. But you don’t wait for him to ask and explain further. “I handled her wedding invitations as a favor when she texted me that there was a problem with it. I’m just bringing them here to deliver it.” 

He takes in every word and pauses to think, the information you gave him is not just adding up in his head. He still appears puzzled. “But why you ?” 

You shrug and answer quickly while lifting the teacup in front of you to your face. “I knew a way to handle it so I offered.” 

You take a sip. It’s green tea. It’s good. You wonder what brand it is but you’re definitely not gonna ask him. 

He nods but with a tightness to it, as if he’s holding back from saying something. Another follow question comes out from his lips, “And she knows this, how?” 

You understand where he's getting at. He’s easing you into telling him how the hell you’re in contact with his friend after so long. He’s probably curious as to how and when this friendship started and if Hange has been keeping this from him for a while. 

“We’ve been texting,” you admit while setting down the cup, seeing no point in denying the truth and acting like you’re going behind his back. 

His brows raised for a second, amused. Then, his face returns to his usual stoic ones, but this time with a darkened gaze. You guess that he probably feels somewhat betrayed that his friend kept this little information from him, not that she was entitled to tell him about who she reconnected with. Hange was your friend too so you don’t see what’s so wrong about that. 

You stared at his face pointedly and replied with a sharpened tone. “Don’t make that face. It’s barely been a week,” you add, not even waiting for him to ask ‘Since when? ’ because it’s written all over his face. 

He stays quiet and avoids your eyes, fixing his gaze to nothing particular by his side. You take this chance to add more to it. “We ran into each other while shopping and exchanged numbers. Is that all you want to know?” 

His jaw clenched. You could see his side profile so clearly with how he looked to the side. Your words make him realize something. “…you’re back in town?” 

You huff, infuriated that the thought of you being back in Paradis was appalling to him. “For almost a month now. For a job. It’s not permanent yet so don’t go cursing me around already.” 

“And here I thought you promised you’d stay far away from me,” he recalled tightly with a smirk on his face.

“Yeah. You’re all about keeping promises, aren’t you?” 

You look down at your black top that still holds a bit of evidence from his childish skit by the door. Your fingers pinch the loose fabric by your chest to see the neckline and collar better.

“I am,” he agrees sternly, meeting your eyes. 

You scoff, bringing your hands back down on your lap. He sits up and leans back on the couch, chin raised and legs crossed. He was taunting you. He wants to see you riled up. It’s not going to happen. Does he think that you can’t handle him? 

The only way you can win his game is to act like the calm and mature grown-up you are. In short, unbothered. It’s not like you did anything wrong except for cutting communication with everyone after graduation. It was what you thought to be the right thing to do. Of course, you feel bad that you hurt them. But if you had to go back in time, you’d do it again. 

With fists balling tight on your lap, you taunt back through gritted teeth and narrowed eyes. “I didn’t expect you to be like this. How are you still holding a grudge after seven years?” 

“How are you still so shamelessly indifferent after seven years?” 

He spat every venomous word out and meant it, showing from the way his eyes aggressively sent daggers to your face. The words left a deep frown on his mouth, glaring at you relentlessly. 

The pent-up, irritated expression on your face falls down in an instant. Like an attack, those two words are trying to break their way into your carefully curated walls, making you harden up. 

Shamelessly indifferent. 

How are you still so shamelessly indifferent?  

With an impassive face, your soulless eyes bore into his icy ones. You set your lips into a straight line, giving away no expression he could read into. 

How are you still so shamelessly indifferent?  

His cold glare challenges your devoid expression. Like two hard walls parallel to each other, no one is seeing the other as they truly are unless one breaks down. 

How are you still so shamelessly indifferent?  

Neither of you will willingly let that happen. You won’t surrender your armor just yet when it has helped you last this long. You know your decisions would lead to this. To his hatred. You were fine with it. You were fine with being the protagonist of both your stories. There are much bigger things than that in this life that you were willing to trade anything for. 

How are you still so shamelessly indifferent?

If that’s the case… Why do you feel so freshly wounded? 

A door bursts open, startling the two of you. A loud boisterous voice pierces your ears, shouting your name. Your head whips in the direction of the way leading to the front door. You hear it close gently, then there were some thuds and sounds of shoes. From your peripheral, you see Levi slap a palm on his face with a groan. 

The footsteps come running in, revealing an excited but disheveled-looking Hange. As she spots you sitting on the couch, she lets out a piercing shriek and jumps up with wavering hands. Her energy is so intensely soaring that an affectionate smile spreads on your face instantly as a response and has greeted her with it. 

She runs to you across the floor in her socks and then tackles you into an enormous warm hug. You hear Levi sigh from his seat while he stares at the situation. You’re being squished again, Hange pressed to your side and hanging onto you like a koala. 

“Now, Hange. Please don’t hog her all to yourself.” 

Your ears perked up at the sound of the deep voice and whip your head in that direction. As you suspected, there’s a grinning tall, blonde, and handsome man standing not far from you. He’s in actual indoor slippers too unlike Hange who just threw off her shoes. 

Erwin was always the most, if not the only, mature among the four of you. He just had this aura that overpowers everyone when he walks into a room. Smart, confident, and a born leader. You always looked up to him when you were young. 

“Erwin,” you gaped as he strides towards you. 

Now standing beside you and Hange (who was still refusing to let you go), he reaches in and pats your head gently. “Hey, Greenie,” he greets you warmly, which you exchange with a genuine smile of delight. 

Erwin then proceeds to gently sit in the space beside you. All while smirking at his friend who sat alone on the couch across from the three of you. ”Levi, you look awfully upset,” he teased. 

“Hange, explain. Now.” Levi ignores his blonde friend’s attempt to mock him, focusing deadly on the brunette woman clinging to you. You feel Hange lightly shudder at his words. When you tap her arm, you look at her with pleading eyes, indicating you agree with Levi in wanting an explanation for this predicament you don’t doubt she planned. 

Pouting, Hange reluctantly releases you from her hold. She stares back at Levi who’s waiting but clearly without much patience. She looks at you who raised your brows, urging her to speak up. She huffs while facing forward again, arms crossed but her mouth quivering in excitement. 

“Pft,” she holds back a laugh.

“Hange,” Levi warns in spite. 

And then she bursts. 

“Okay, fine! I sent her your address instead of mine intentionally.” She throws her hands in the air enthusiastically, amusingly proud of herself. Then she turns to you sheepishly. “In my defense, I didn’t explicitly say it’s my address in the texts.” 

Your mouth drops. “What? Yes, you did.”

Hange shakes her head, thoroughly convinced. “No. You said ‘Hange, what’s your address? I’ll have a courier send the invitations to you.’ And then I said ‘No. Just come to this address after work on Saturday and personally give it to me.’ So technically, no, I didn’t. You just assumed it.” 

You stare at her, dumbfounded. Beside you, Erwin chuckles and Levi grumbles at her explanation. “Great. Here comes the Harvard graduate.”

After taking a deep breath, you calmly ask. “Okay… but why here?” A valid question, you feel. Why would Hange purposely send you to Levi’s home? Her friend’s ex-girlfriend? With both of you unaware?

Hange grins from ear to ear, wriggling like a worm on her seat. She can’t help herself but stand up to explain in exaggeration, walking back and forth with hand gestures. 

“Well my dearest friends, you see, when I saw Greenie for the first time after seven years, coincidentally before my wedding and the same day one of my planned bridesmaids called to tell me they can’t attend the wedding. I knew that it had to be fate. This was the gods aligning the universe for me and my wedding. Unfortunately, she rejected my invitation.” 

“Of course, she would, dipshit. Why would you practically invite a stranger to your wedding?” Levi sneers at you. You roll your eyes. Hange ignores the remark from Levi that was meant to insult you and claps her hand loudly to distract you from getting down into a glaring contest. 

“As I was saying, she refused my invitation. I was okay with that at first then my big brain was like… ‘It’s probably because of Levi!’ So I thought that we could all have a lovely day together to get over the dramatic reunion and see if we could all be civil before the wedding, you know?” Hange ends with hands on her waist. 

“That makes zero sense,” you whisper to yourself while shaking your head. 

“All of this is to get her to attend your shitty wedding?” Levi complains.

Hange nods enthusiastically, eyes flitting back and forth from Levi and then to you. “So? What’s our status? Do you guys still hate each other? Wanna kill each other?”

“I definitely want to kill someone. But it’s not her,” Levi’s face hardened, shooting daggers at Hange who didn't even bat an eye. 

“Walk it off, Levi. You didn’t answer my question,” Hange brushes his words of murderous attempt at her life. 

“I don’t know, Hange. He literally sprayed some window-cleaning solution on my face and threw baking soda on me earlier. Who knows? Maybe he’ll dunk my face on your wedding cake next,” you chime in. 

Erwin snorts. Hange gasps. Levi tilts his head back with closed eyes, sighing. Their immediate reaction to your words left a bewildered look on your face. 

“He actually did it?!” Hange dramatically slaps a hand over her mouth, gaping at Levi in disbelief. “No fucking way!”

“Wow, Levi. I guess all those practices were worth it, weren’t they?” Even Erwin taunts with an amused grin. Now that catches your attention. He had been practicing throwing you his cleaning supplies?  Why would he… unless…? 

You turned to the blonde man, perplexed. “He practiced it?” 

“No,” Levi is quick to deny, now sitting up straight. 

“Yes,” Hange and Erwin answer you at the same time.

Levi doesn’t speak without a sound of distaste leaving his mouth and sending daggers to his two friends. “Don’t flatter yourself. They ask me to do it.”

“Oh, yes we do. Especially when he’s had too much to drink.” Hange says as she finally sits back down beside you.

“Moblit purposefully gets him to a drinking contest just so he can do it,” Erwin says. 

“It ends with both of them getting awfully wasted. It’s really funny that the trouble of getting them home is almost worth it,” Hange whispers to you. 

“One time, at a party, he started throwing baking soda everywhere like he’s blessing the house with some sort of ritual,” Erwin reminisced and shook his head. 

Levi, obviously having enough of his friends’ betrayal and teasing, rolls his eyes and gets up from his seat to leave. “That’s it. I’m not hearing any of this shit.” He turns his back and starts to stride off to his spacious kitchen with his teacup in his hand while Hange snickers beside you, sharing looks of amusement with Erwin. 

You’re unaware of how to act. Should you act friendly to Hange and Erwin? Should you leave? You’re not sure of what’s really happening here. Maybe it’d be better if you just leave and apologetically reject Hange’s invite for the last time. Although you’re glad that the two had received you warmly despite how long it’s been and Levi, as annoying as he is, even offered you to freshen up in his home. 

How are you still so shamelessly indifferent?  

Maybe it’s better if you still keep your distance from them. You’re not implying you’ll ignore or jump to the next city again. It would be good for both you and Levi to not share the same friend group again. You should know your place. 

You place a hand on top of Hange’s that was on her lap, letting out a soft sigh before you speak. An apology is due to your old friends. It’s okay. You can do it. Just don’t cry. 

“Hange, I really appreciate the invite. Truly. But it’s more than the reason you think. It’s just been so long and I probably don’t know anyone there anymore, you know?” You started explaining with a smile and then moved your head to Erwin and continued.

“And I know that it wasn’t nice, disappearing all those years ago. I’m sorry if that upset you.” You squeeze Hange’s hand while looking at Erwin who now has abandoned his playful attitude just seconds ago. He was listening to you intently. It wasn’t like him to bare his emotions out in the open but unlike Levi’s form of being guarded. Erwin has just always just been like that, keeping his emotions controlled and regulated. And yet, you see a tinge of sadness in his eyes. You know you do owe them some kind of closure. And once you’ve given them that, you’ll be on your way and live your life in Paradis quietly just as you’ve been doing for the past seven years. This time, just a little bit closer to them. 

“But the three of you have still been so kind to me now despite that and how long it’s been. So thank you.” You made sure to include Levi knowing he’s listening somewhere in his kitchen. You turn your head to Hange who stayed quiet with her chin down, your hand still in each other’s. Her hand is rough, no doubt from her adventurous personality. Despite that, you appreciate the warmth of her hand. It reminded you of how that same warmth comforted you in the past when you needed it. 

“I do agree with Levi, though. It might be a bit weird if I attend your wedding out of nowhere. I’m glad that you want me back in your life. But attending and playing such an important role in your wedding might be too soon for me not to feel bad about it. Don’t worry about me, Hange. I want you to enjoy your day with Moblit,” you whisper the last two sentences to Hange who still hung her head down. 

“Ah…” Hange’s deep voice grovels, a tone she only uses when she’s serious. “I really thought that it would work.” 

You chuckle, placing your other hand on your intertwined ones. “If Levi was able to do what he apparently always wanted to do with me, then I’d say it went well. For him, at least.”

Hange finally lifts her face, looking defeated. It instantly makes you feel guilty having done that. 

“I appreciate you looking out for me. For Levi. But hey, we can still hang out. Erwin, you wanna have my number? Hange has it.”

Erwin nods, smiling genuinely. “I will take you up on that. I might need a lawyer. Who’s better than an attorney from ODM?” 

“Wait, you know where I work?” 

Erwin scoffs. “It’s me, Greenie. What do you think?” 

You let it go with a short laugh. It’s either Hange told him or his smartass somehow knows. Sometimes, you think Erwin should’ve pursued being a detective. Or the President, though that would be quite dangerous, you feel. 

“Oi.” 

The three of you turn your heads in the direction of Levi’s voice who stood on the threshold of the way to the kitchen. While his side leaning on the wall, he had his arms crossed, staring right into your eyes with the same exasperated expression painted on his face. Once he caught everyone’s attention, he spoke.

“Don’t be dramatic and just go to the wedding.” 

“But—“

“It’s just a wedding. You said it yourself. Nobody knows you. It should be easy to go and leave.” 

You pause, tilting your chin down to think for yourself. You do want to go but there’s something holding you back. Shame, maybe. 

“Unless you’re really uncomfortable with me, which should hardly be the case. Because for me, I really don’t care if you’re there or not. It’s your choice.” 

You look at Hange, whose eyes are now beginning to fill with hope but she silently awaits your answer. You look at Levi again, trying to decipher his words and actions. 

“You’re sure you’re okay with me being there?” You ask him. 

Levi sighs like he’s tired of the question. “I couldn’t care less, Greenie .” And then he turns around again, disappearing back to the kitchen. 

Hange doesn’t ask for an answer right away. Easy enough, one question from Erwin about how Hange's day got the atmosphere to shift into a lighter one, shifting from one conversation to another. When Hange was in the middle of babbling about her wedding preparations, Levi came out of the kitchen with a tray of snacks and drinks. 

They’re just fruit sandwiches and another batch of tea. Your mouth instantly waters, remembering the fact that all you had for lunch today was the pack of pocky sticks you had in your bag and a mango juice you bought in the office cafeteria. Both of which you ate in the car on the way home. Sue your laziness. 

“Thank you so much, househusband Levi!” Hange takes one of the sandwiches in an instance, munching on the soft bread filled with whipped cream and sliced strawberries. 

“Whatever. Don’t make a fucking mess.” He sits down and turns on the television for what you guess is background noise. He throws the remote to Erwin who swiftly catches it without a warning. 

While Erwin switches through different apps and channels with Levi’s eyes on the television, you take the opportunity to get a sandwich for yourself, carefully holding it between your fingers. While your other hand is under your mouth to avoid being messy, you take a bite and immediately fight to hold back to moan. How is this strawberry so good and sweet? 

You practically inhaled the sandwich right after. Though you don’t look at him, you swear that you saw a corner of Levi’s mouth twitch upwards. You’re not sure if that was because of you or the survival reality tv show that Erwin had settled on playing but decided to believe it’s the latter, not wanting to overthink whatever was that. 

The next few hours were tolerable enough. The topics, as thankful as you are, are never about you for long, it’s mostly Hange talking your ears off about her work. You told them what you just told Hange about your life. Those being where you work and what you do. You also told them you’d been in Trost for a while before being transferred here. Though nearing the end of your gathering, one conversation led to something you were trying to avoid, you know that it was just a matter of time before they had to know. 

Erwin, after offering to drive you home, asked you where you were staying, and when you told them where you didn’t miss their looks of disfavor. 

“That crappy apartment by The Underground?” Hange was the first to say something out of concern. 

You nod. You understand their disapproval, the place isn’t exactly the safest in the city. It isn’t like you couldn’t afford something better, you just didn’t want to commit to something permanent only to leave again. “Don’t give me that look, Hanj. It’s not that bad.” 

“Still, it’s not very safe for you and Marjorie.” Hange insists. You gave her a smile, and though you try not to make it seem sad, the thought of your grandmother still brings upon a tight pang in your chest no matter how long it’s been. 

“Marj… she’s not with me… anymore,” you tell them, looking down at the teacup in your hand and explaining in one word. “Leukemia.”

Everyone in the room immediately froze for a few seconds as they looked at you in shock which you hated. Hange’s hands flew to her mouth, stuttering an immediate apology. From your right, Erwin pats your shoulders in consolation. Levi is just staring at you, ever so unreadable. 

“It’s fine, uh… it’s been a while since she passed. Don’t worry about it,” you chuckle, a hard attempt to convince them. You weren’t lying, though. It’s really been a while for you to have a breakdown at the thought of it. “And The Underground is not that bad anymore. I’ll be safe.”

If this was seven years ago, you wouldn’t have even considered living in The Underground alone. It’s this neighborhood in Paradis that was infamous for sheltering delinquents, criminals, and runaways. It’s always been a part of the city that never agreed with the ideals of the local government because of its informal settlers who refused to leave. That is why it's often set on fire. Literally. There’s never any proof but it was common knowledge that it's done to make them leave. That is also why the lodging and apartments close to it are the cheapest in the city.

The landlord had done well in selling the one-bedroom apartment to you, not uttering a word about The Underground and only of how big of a catch it was because it’s the cheapest in the city and someone had just recently moved out of it. You knew better before entertaining a visit though, well aware of the consequences and why there were triple locks on the front door. In defense of your decision, the inside of the place wasn’t actually crap, the interior of the apartment is modern and surprisingly clean. There were secure locks on the windows too. It’s really just the outside of the building that is due for a repaint, littered with both vulgar and creative vandalism. You realized that the reason why it has such a run-down appearance was also to keep it safe. There’s hardly anyone that would want to rob what basically looks like it’s falling apart. 

To add to that, when you drove past The Underground, it was surprisingly not as chaotic and loud as it was before. You thought that maybe some new mayor actually had a functioning brain and realized that setting fire to the poor population doesn’t really fix anything. So what the hell, you took a bite of the risk and accepted the 6 months lease. 

“It is,” Erwin surprisingly agreed with you. “But nevertheless, you are a vulnerable woman living alone. I can help you look for some other cheaper apartment away from it if you want.” 

“Thank you, Win,” you genuinely say to him. “But I’ll be fine. It’s just for 6—actually, just 5 months left now. If I get permanent employment at ODM, it will come with an apartment as a benefit, actually.” 

“If you say so,” Erwin reluctantly agrees. “But the second you feel unsafe, text me. I would take care of things immediately.” 

“I don’t doubt you will,” you granted, thankful. You don’t feel particularly fearful of where you’re staying. You definitely lived in worse places without much choice. Physically wise, you can take care of yourself… you think. 

With a deep inhale, you hook your bag in your arm and get up from the couch. “Well, it’s getting a bit late. I should go.” 

“No! Don’t go yet,” Hange whined, pouting. 

“Are you sure we can’t convince you to stay for dinner?” Erwin stands up as well, ever the gentleman. You really don’t want to intrude or overstay. Besides, the owner of the house didn’t even invite you to stay. It’s easy for you to read the room. 

Shaking your head, you look up as you reply to the tall blonde man. “Nah. I gotta go take care of some things tonight, sorry. Next time?” you ask, particularly to everyone despite only conversing with Erwin. 

“Absolutely,” Erwin responds. You give him a smile. “Alright. Text me.” 

“Hange, I’ll text you my decision about the wedding very soon, okay? Thanks for today.” You say as you give Hange a hug to which she reciprocates lovingly.

“Ugh. I miss you already.” She sighs then leans into your ear. “Sorry about setting you up today,” she apologizes with a snicker. You pat her back in response. When she lets you go, she still has that big grin on her face.

You turn to Levi, giving him a nod out of courtesy. “Levi.”

He nods in return, gaze still heavy on you. He says your name back as a form of goodbye, still seated on the couch cross-legged as you stand in front of him, the low coffee table in between the two of you. 

“Thanks for the… tea and snack.” Though sincere, you didn’t mean for it to come out the opposite. 

“I’m sure you were,” Levi’s piercing eyes could cut through like a knife. You size him up in a similar regard. He was the attacker and you were the defender in this staring contest and you were the most competitive pair this game has seen, no one eager to back down. 

“Levi, why don’t you escort your guest to her car?” 

It was Erwin’s question that sliced through the tension, cutting their game short. 

Levi scoffs. “Do it yourself.”

”There’s no need for that, Win,” you say almost at the same time.

“Nonsense,” he addresses you and then the man on the couch. “Levi, don’t be a rude host.” Erwin glares at Levi. You almost smile at the interaction. Levi and Erwin had always been an odd pair. The blonde always had a way with the raven-haired boy, always pushing him to a certain extent but it was always for the better. It seems like that dynamic hasn’t changed at all. 

“Really, Erwin. I’m gonna be fine. I’ll text you when I get home,” you say lightheartedly as you’re already walking to the door to wear your shoes. 

Erwin and Hange followed you, watching as you slipped off the house slippers and wore your heels. You bid the pair one last goodbye before stepping out of the lavish apartment.

Sighing, you begrudgingly walk away from his door as you feel the tension leave you when you were no longer in the same room as them. It was a relief but god was that exhausting. 

You missed them though. It felt so… weird. They matured but never changed their personalities. It’s like if seven years ago, someone told you to picture how the trio would be, you would’ve pictured them as they are now. It’s funny, you think, how circumstances and situations can change everything about a person, how one heavy decision leads to a myriad of decisions too, how everything interconnects and falls apart. It’s all so funny. 

As you wait for the elevator to rise to Levi’s floor, you hear his door creak open, revealing Levi with a petulant face. You raised a brow but don’t utter a word. Erwin must have made him do it somehow. 

He silently waits beside you, letting him do whatever he has to in silence. The elevator dings open and you step inside immediately. You pressed the lobby level as Levi steps in. 

It was quiet, only the subtle elevator music fills what was supposed to be an empty silence. Levi doesn’t even look at you, just glaring hard at the closing doors of the elevator with crossed arms. You look at him, shoulders tensed but face unbothered. He obviously did not want to be here with the way his face is scrunched up and his foot was tapping aggressively. It’s not like you wanted him to be here either. You just want to get out of here as soon as possible and away from him. 

And of course, just like the heavens heard you, the elevator abruptly halts to a stop with a hard rattle, the lights flickering for two seconds before being stable again. You gasped a little in shock but you stay on your feet and maintained your balance, your hand gripping your bag for emotional support. 

Levi, however, immediately holds your arm in response. 

You look at him and his hand on you. His eyes were wide in worry and his hold was almost in a form of a tug before he stopped, your arm now raised mid-air. He didn’t look frightened, just cautious and agile. It was almost like it triggered his protective instinct. 

When he realized, he immediately lets go as if you were scalding. 

Sighing, you walk to the buttons and pressed the emergency button. When the light came on, you spoke into the microphone. “We’re stuck in the elevator with a direct line to the penthouse. Please send assistance.” 

Immediately, someone from maintenance or security replies back with an assurance that they’re on it. They proceeded to ask how many are there with you and if everyone is alright. The typical questions at emergencies like this. 

“We’re both fine. Your penthouse resident is pissed as hell, though.” 

“We apologize, ma’am and sir Levi. We will have this elevator going in no time. Don’t worry.” 

The emergency button’s light fades and you sigh, going back to the middle where you stood earlier.

“You don’t seem to be very startled,” Levi spoke up.

You look at him for a second, surprised he’s starting a conversation with you. You don’t have a problem with tight spaces and you’re confident that you won’t die even if you’re basically stuck in a tin can right now. This is a well-sought apartment complex and this is probably an expensive tin can. It won’t come crashing down soon. “Is there a reason I should be?” 

He clears his throat and then doesn’t say anything back. He’s back on ignoring you and cursing every corner of the room with his venomous glare. He’s back on his anxious foot tapping again, the sound of his shoes tapping is as annoying as the droplets of water hitting the sink. It’s annoying you more than the godawful elevator music. 

“God, can you stop that?” You spat, brows furrowed. 

“No,” he denied in an instant. 

You roll your eyes. “Piece of shit.” 

“Says you,” he mumbled, his foot tapping growing incessantly faster. You know he’s just trying to rile you up more.

“It blows my mind how you’re still this grumpy and insufferable. I assumed age would compensate for the lack of social skills.” You glare at him. “And what was that? You practiced throwing those cleaning supplies? That’s all you could think of to do or say to me after seven years?” 

“What about you?” 

“What about me?”

“That’s all you could say? Sorry? After what you’ve done?”

“What have I done, Levi? What have I done that was so wrong?” 

“God, you’re so conceited.” He rolls his eyes. “You can’t even make up an excuse for leaving. That’s why you ran like a coward. Now you’re back and all you had to say was ‘sorry’? And not even to me?” 

“Why? What else did you expect from me when I appeared at your door, Levi?” You spat with a venomous taunt. 

He was left speechless, you assume not knowing what to say or maybe holding back on something. You decided to continue, eyes fixed on the metal doors in front of you. 

“I thought about it—what I was going to say to you after all those years. But I know that I wouldn’t have been as bitter as you. It’s been seven years. We broke up before I even left. As a former friend, I was in the wrong for ghosting everyone. As an ex-girlfriend, I have no obligations to you.”

The elevator dinged and suddenly, the whirling sound of the machine was back, and only after a few seconds of silence did the doors open and you immediately stepped out, breathing in the air from the lobby. You were expecting Levi to follow you out but when you turned your head to look back at him, he was still inside the elevator, looking at you with a stare so cold that it will give anyone near frostbite. The corners of his mouth are pointing downwards into a frown directed at you and his arms are laying limply by his sides. 

Confused and heavily startled by his expression, you could only watch as the elevator doors closed with him still inside, eyes never leaving yours, and with a look on his face that mirrors the same one when you left him seven years ago. 

© levisolace. please do not copy, translate, claim any of my works. my works are cross-posted only on my ao3 account. thank you.