Minho Timestamp - Tumblr Posts
[2:25 AM]
The fresh bedsheets are cold but your skin is burning hot, cheeks flushed and tear stained. Normally, this would be a happy ending. The night would stop here, the day would come, you would go and Minho would pretend it didn't happen until the next time it did.
That was okay with you, it made things easier. You didn't want him to act any different for your sake; both of you agreed to this arrangement, and there were clear rules set out in bold text, underlined in red.
There were lines there so you would not cross them, and yet here you are. In his bed, staring up at the ceiling with an ache in your chest from your heavy heart, weighed down with unwanted thoughts and feelings.
His soft snoring echoes throughout the otherwise silent room, and it makes the walls seem taller and the distance between your bodies that much larger. It makes you feel vunerable. It makes you feel weak.
How could you have let it get to this point? You knew before you went into this that it could never go too far. The deal was there would be no strings attached, and you could leave whenever you felt like it.
Except you couldn't. You wanted to leave, wanted to tell him this deal wasn't working and you needed more, you needed him. You wanted nothing more than to be spending these nights cuddling instead of drowning your stupid feelings in a couple shots of whatever cheap liquor was in your glass and pretending you were only in love with his body.
More tears fall, dripping against his pillowcase.
You wish your feelings would do the same, just drip away until there's nothing left, but instead your mind feels full to the brim with 'what if's that you know are all painfully pointless. He doesn't feel the same. He doesn't care, he'll never care, it doesn't even matter...but what if-
"Y/N?" Minho's sleepy voice breaks you out of your thoughts, an arm reaching blindly towards your curled up figure to pull you against him. "Why are you still awake?"
You don't trust your voice enough to give a proper response right now, so you simply hum and let him hold you like it means anything to him.
He doesn't seem to mind, though, drifting off to sleep again minutes later.
His arms are wrapped around you and his body is so warm, but you've never felt colder in your life.