NOT My Headcanons - Tumblr Posts
Oh absolutely! Sniper would have been my first pick tbh, since he’s definitely one to know exactly what to do in a situation like that. Engineer, while smart and chill (I agree you’d spend a lot of time around the campfire!), might not fare well in the survival department since he’s more of a metal-working guy.
,,but imagine an s/o cuddling against the merc of choice in the wilderness against a tree or in a makeshift shelter in the cold-- hhh
✈️ tf2? 😳
I dunno the idea of being trapped on an island with ANY merc seems like absolute hell but yknow which would be the least?
✈ - character I'd rather be stuck on an island with -
If I had to pick one I'd probably pick Engineer. He's good company, probably really likes campfires, and after a day or so would probably have built a working plane out of twigs and seaweed to get us the hell outta there.
Sniper's also a good choice due to his wilderness survival skills.
!!!!!
Good post op
(Also I can doodle him perhaps maybe tomorrow?)
(I need to finish something for a collab first oh shoot I forgot)
(But still... Merasmus...)
(Might do some general headcanons in the meantime or finish one of the Merasmus requests from earlier..!)
Thank you for the Merasmus posts, he needs more love! :]
Heheh thank you! I'd love to do actual art of him one day instead of just rebloggin him, but I'm not very good at drawing (especially old dudes like merasmurray) so. Maybe some day.
Though I can share some headcanons! This is a bit of a common one but I do like to think of him as transmasc
Also, Merasmus sometimes will play DnD with the more willing mercs (after much pushing from Soldier)! He uses his magic to make fun effects and stuff. He isn't happy about it, but he secretly thinks its fun
Hello! So I have this OC i ship with Sniper, and I was wondering if you could write prompts for Scout or any of the other team members trying to get Sniper and a reader in general together. Thanks, and love your prompts!
Sure can do, and thanks so much! The compliments mean a lot to me :•) lol this idea was fun to work with, I wrote a lot more than I thought I would! I hope it’s not too rambly lol
Scout and the mercs being Sniper’s wingmen
No TWs
Scout and Sniper’s friendship is actually stronger than one might think, considering it all started because Scout refused to stop pestering the Aussie. Eventually Sniper got used to it, and Scout basically adopted him as his introverted friend. They don’t always hang out but they’re definitely close!
The Bostonian is not always the most observant, so he doesn’t exactly catch on to the tension between Sniper and you until he’s questioning why the Aussie’s been ditching him to hang with you.
“What, you got like a crush on ‘em or somethin’?”
“…”
“… wait, no way— actually?? You have a crush?? On them??!”
“Oi, shut your trap, ya damn weasel!”
The furious blush that grows on Mick’s face, and the lack of an outright denial, are enough for Scout to absolutely tease the shit out of him. It’s likely that the entire team will find out about Sniper’s crush on you simply from Scout’s teasing. He likes to make kissy faces mockingly behind your back when the man speaks to you, especially.
The other mercs tease him too, but none are as relentless (or as vulgar) as Scout.
“You know they’re waaayy out of your league, right?”
“…Yeah, I know.”
That’s what ultimately strikes a chord with Scout. He was only joking, but Sniper wasn’t. Mick doesn’t… think very highly of himself to begin with. He’s certainly not boyfriend material in his eyes, and you’re like perfection personified. There’s no way you’d settle for a bloke like him.
Scout hates seeing someone he cares about wallow in self pity like that, and he feels pretty shitty for going too far with his teasing. So, his apology? He’s going to play Sniper’s wingman and get him a hot date (despite Sniper’s protests).
At first, Scout tries to big up Sniper the way he big up himself. He tells you anytime he does well on the field as he’s especially proud of his work. But he also tries to make Sniper seem “cooler” the same way Jeremy tries to make himself seem cooler, which… leads to some slight lying. He gets halfway through his very over dramatized story about Mick winning a bar fight against five dudes the size of Saxton Hale before the Aussie pushes Scout out of the room and apologizes to you for his behaviour. You both get a laugh out of it at least!
Scout tries to recall everything Spy had taught him from Expiration Date, except he’s mostly forgotten half of what he said and Sniper’s certain that the bucket of chicken trick is not going to work on you. Jeremy argues that no, it will because who doesn’t like a bucket of chicken??
But not all of his advice is that bad. He does tell Mick that if you hated him like he thought, then you wouldn’t always be hanging around him or talking to him. And that he’s certainly not as unattractive as he says. That builds his confidence a little, but he’s still grumpy the entire time, slouching in his seat with his arms crossed as Scout explains what to do when your date is at 7pm.
Eventually, because Scout cannot keep a secret to save his life, word gets out that he’s been coaching Sniper on how to ask you out, and the other mercs decide to help. Some out of a genuine desire to help, others simply because the “Sniper has the biggest, sappiest crush on someone” schtick is hilarious and they want to tease him. Sniper is not appreciative all the time.
“You want to impress them? Is not necessary. They like Sniper very much. But my advice? Fight bear for them. Is very attractive trait to have.”
“You want my advice? Take a shower, bushman.”
“Laddie, yer plenty good enough for ‘em. They’re always hanging around ye anyways; what makes ye think they dinnae like ye?”
“Mph mmmhph!!”
“Now slim, you’re overthinkin’ this. I’m sure it’ll all go well. They’re always telling us guys how great a guy you are… if I was any less observant I’d say the feelin’s mutual.”
“The purest form of love is WAR! You must FIGHT to win the object of your affection’s heart! Now get your boney ass out there and show that son of a bitch the most ROMANTIC fist fight America has ever seen, private!!”
“Don’t worry yourself, Herr Sniper; if you fail to win over their figurative heart, you can always have their literal heart! I am not using it at the moment.”
Yeah not everyone’s advice was taken. But strangely, it did make him feel overall more willing to bite the bullet, especially hearing that the feeling’s not unrequited. But he still refuses to use the chicken trick or lovingly fist fight you. He figures he’ll just invite you to his camper for coffee and fess up there. And that he does.
Just know, the entire team will be proudly patting Sniper on the back for scoring a date with you. And Scout will take all the credit for setting up the lovely couple despite being of little help.
somebody's definitely made this joke already but i think scout in all his early 2000's whiteboy swag would definitely fucking smoke DDR. he'd be one of those freaks that are straight up just breakdancing on the arrows. breaking it down transgender style. you guys understand what im aiming at
Thoughts on what happens after the Truman Show
He changes his name as soon as he knows that people can change names. Anything to distance himself from the show
At first, reporters and psychologists swarm him at every opportunity but he won't respond. He won't say anything to them. Until years and years later when he tells everyone what it was really like.
He's constantly surprised by things. How small and distant the moon looks. The strange nonchalance of an unscripted conversation. Food from different cultures. How the weather changes gradually instead of just switching on and off.
When he first saw CCTV cameras everywhere, he started to think it was all an elaborate trick until it was explained to him what they were actually for. Even so... sometimes he wonders.
Everyone knows his name which is extremely jarring
He lives with Sylvia and she tries to help integrate him into the real world. It's a difficult journey, but eventually he makes it.
He's astounded by the sheer depth of freedom he has. He can walk down that path he hasn't been down before. He can travel wherever he wants. The whole world is at his fingertips.
He becomes an explorer and tries his best to reach every part of the world. He's still scared of open water, but there's something about the sailing that comforts him, in a way. There's so much open, free space
Truman doesn't watch TV. He tried but it resulted in a very bad panic attack
Panic attacks are not that uncommon
Sometimes he has to check if the people he's talking to have earpieces or not just to reassure himself
He finally gets to go to Fiji!