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reading this after listening to joon on neva play has me in shambles !!

18+ | ft. hollywood actor!namjoon

[ 08:02 P.M. ] everything about this screamed bad idea. but you have already begun, and there was no stopping it at this point now that he has already locked you inside his trailer’s small bathroom, sat on the counter with his lips placing wet and languid kisses on the base of your throat. from those actions alone, you’re already trembling beneath his touch, perhaps due to all the weeks you’ve spent lying to yourself that you weren’t sexually attracted to your obnoxious and arrogant co-star, kim namjoon, when in fact you couldn’t even get him off your mind every time you finished a kissing scene.

as soon as the director yells cut and you were back in your trailer, all you could think about was how soft his lips have been, how good he was at kissing you, how his tongue snuck inside your mouth, how he slyly encouraged you to do the same to him, and how his hands squeezed the sides of your body. it was safe to say that after the first time the both of you have kissed on camera, you couldn’t look him straight in the eye unless it was for a take, which you knew namjoon noticed and absolutely reveled in.

“this is wrong,” you whisper, even if you allow him to slide his hands under your shirt, clutching your waist and pulling you towards him in a sudden jerk. “we shouldn’t be—fuck. this is so fucking unprofessional, namjoon.”

he pulls his head back from where he’s nibbling your ear. he’s smirking now, enjoying whatever it was that’s happening at this second. “what’s unprofessional about practicing for a scene?” he asks. “we’re just making sure we nail it before it gets filmed.”

“if that was the case, there should be an intimacy coach with us.”

“we can call her then. let her decide how i’m going to make you feel good tonight.”

“you’re not serious, are you?”

“of course not.” you see him roll his eyes. “unless you like being watched, then maybe i can make an exception for you.”

“i am not some kind of exhibionist.”

“instead, you’re an actress—which is essentially the same thing, right?”

you have the nerve to laugh at the ridiculousness of his statement, but then you feel his hands sliding further under your bra, cupping your tits and kneading them—and your brain short circuits, speechless at the sensation it’s giving you, more so when he closes the distance between your faces and grants you the kiss you can never refrain from indulging in.

you’re reminded that this was wrong again on so many levels. why did you even agree to this? you knew it was already stupid when the proposal of ‘practicing’ the bed scene was offered to you by namjoon, yet you agreed anyway, despite knowing very well that this was just a scheme to get under your pants. you weren’t blind nor oblivious; you were positive that namjoon craved for you as much as you craved for him in between the instances you aren’t acting and playing the part of being lovers. you just didn’t think that he would have the courage to make a move and do something about the sexual tension you shared with each other even when the camera isn’t rolling.

you suck in a deep breath as he goes down on his knees, fingers fumbling on the buttons and zipper of your pants to take it off for you. once he does, you have a harder time regulating your breathing; the sight of him alone with his hair pointing in every direction and his cheeks flushed with anticipation are enough to drive you crazy. not to mention the look he has on his eyes which are hypnotizing as fuck—it’s desperate, seductive, and smug, like he knows that you’ll keep on coming back to him after he’s done with you.

 the moment you felt him lick your entrance and push your knees open for him, you’re a goner, throwing your head back and praying to the heavens that nobody thinks of visiting namjoon at his trailer this evening.

Birthday Present

Pairing: Namjoon x reader

Genre: Smut

Rating: M - nsfw

Warnings: Implied committed relationship, adult situations

Word Count: 905

Disclaimers: this is just fiction

Summary: It’s Namjoon’s birthday and you know exactly what to get him.

Keep reading

Purple Ink (RM)

[Words in bold are in Korean]

I begin another doodle on my arm. It's nearly filled now with sketches from my ballpoint pen.

"Seriously, I can't believe your soulmate's never asked you to stop. Your drawings are everywhere at this point" my friend Stacy laughs.

I finish up the rose I'm drawing, "I'm sure they love my drawings. They've told me themself."

Stacy sighs, "I wish my soulmate talked to me more.. do you think I'll ever find them?"

"Easy. Just write your name really big on your forehead, they won't miss you."

"That is FAR from a solution, Y/N."

I laugh and look back down at my arm. A small heart appears next to the flower.

----

A Weverse notification interrupts my thoughts as I walk through the door. "RM started a Live" I open the live.

Namjoon and Hoseok are painting. I giggle as Namjoon spills some ink on his arm. Shutting my phone off, I go to take care of the pile of dishes in the sink.

As I pull my sleeves up, I notice a splatter over my wrist.

"What the.."

I run over and grab my phone. Pulling up the app again, I stiffen at the sight.

Namjoon's purple ink stain covers his wrist, a few splatters on his palm. Exactly like mine.

"No way... it can't be" I mumble.

Slowly, I grab a pen and write a small note on my arm by the splatter. Like clockwork, it shows up on his arm: "Namjoon?"

-----

The next few days, twitter had been blowing up about us.

"Namjoon's soulmate is an ARMY?"

"Guys! She knows! She found him!"

"Aww, that's sweet. Let's be happy for them."

"Wait, you mean they haven't met yet?"

I sigh, bringing my head to my hands.

"What do you want to do about it?" Stacy asks.

"I don't know.. I'm happy but I'm sad and I just don't know what to do. I'm surprised that he's someone I've admired for so long, but I feel dumb for not ever noticing. And I never imagined meeting my soulmate would be like... this. What if ARMY hates me? I don't want to cause him trouble. What if-"

"Relax, girl. I've only seen supportive comments so far. Everyone knows that you can't control soulmates, I'm sure it'll be fine."

"Yeah, I just, i dunno." I slump down in my chair, "it's not like I'll ever get to meet him anyways. It's a lost cause."

"Hey! Chill out. What you need to do is give him a way to find you."

"Such as?" I grumble.

"Such as posting your art online. I've been telling you forever, your creations are too good to keep to yourself! And if you post them, soon enough either he'll find you or ARMY will"

"That's... that's not a bad idea."

And that's how you got here. You'd been posting for two weeks now, but only had about 12 followers.

"Trust the process! He'll find you. It takes time to build an account." Stacy assured you.

"I just feel like the art should be for me, not a faceless algorithm."

"I'm sure he'll find you. He sees your art every day."

"I hope so" I mutter.

-----

I scrolled on my phone half-awake. I couldn't fall asleep, so I decided to explore my feed on instagram. Suddenly, I received a like. And another like. And a follow. And soon enough, a message.

"Who..." I mumbled.

My eyes widened as I see the message they sent me. (Messages by them are in THIS COLOR, messages by you are in THIS COLOR :))

"I'd recognize your art anywhere"

I shiver at their words. Looking at their account, it doesn't help in figuring out who this is. A part of me carries a small hope. It must be Namjoon! He must have found me! But I don't want to get hurt.

"Who are you?"

"My name is Namjoon :) You draw on my arm all the time.."

No... no way. It can't be. What am I supposed to say to my soulmate? What if it's just Stacy pulling some sick prank on me?

"Hmm, prove it then."

Suddenly I feel a tingling sensation on my wrist as words begin to appear.  'Hello artist'. I quickly scratch out a message in our chat room.

"Oh my god, it's really you! I never thought I'd find you.."

"Well you did :) I love your drawings by the way. I'm a big fan."

"No, that's what I'M supposed to be saying. You're music is seriously amazing. I can't believe I get to be your soulmate.."

"You're so cute"

I blush. Not sure what to say, I wait for him to speak again.

"How long have you known?"

"That I'm your soulmate haha"

"Oh, uh, I was watching your live with j-hope"

"Ah, so when I spilled the paint on myself? That isn't very romantic..."

"Well, I'm glad you did regardless."

A question sits at the back of my throat. Suddenly my fingers begin to type it.

"How did you find me?"

He begins to type.

"It's actually kind of similar. I've been following you for a while now. I found your page maybe, two weeks ago? You didn't have too many posts up at the time but as you started posting more, I guess I just kinda realized one day. Like your drawings felt like home to me. And one day I was looking at your art on my Lock Screen, and then down at my arm, and it just hit me. So I decided to message you haha"

"Dfbivaldhflvahf ok wait you made my art your Lock Screen?"

"Shoot. Shouldn't have sent that part"

I giggle.

"Um, I guess where do you live?"

"No no not like that-"

"I feel like I'm messing this whole soulmates thing up already??"

"Like do you also live in Korea or..?"

"Ah, no.. sorry. I live in (INSERT COUNTRY NAME)"

"Don't be sorry! Y'know.. we're actually going to be doing a comeback soon with a tour :D"

"I'll talk and see if we can go there!"

————

I shiver in the cold hallway. He told me to meet him here, is he still coming? Maybe I should leave.. NO! That's silly. He's coming, Y/N. Just be patient.

Suddenly I hear sneakers squeak against the tile. Turning to my left, I notice him. Him. The boy I've been messaging for 7 months now. The one I've been waiting to meet. The one I love.

His dark hair bounces as he runs, star-like shimmers glimmering in his eyes. He slides in front of me, skidding a bit on the slick floor.

"It's you, you're here, I" He pants.

"Hi Namjoon" I smile.

Suddenly my head goes blank. All those months of texting, and I have nothing to say.

"Erm, good luck with the concert."

He checks his watch, "Oh, right, haha. I was so excited to meet you that I forgot about the concert."

"Hey! ARMYs paid good money to be here tonight. Don't forget about them because of me"

He smiles and pulls me into a hug. We swing from left to right as we talk. After around 15 minutes, a staff member informs us that we have to go for him to perform.

Once he leaves I sink down to the floor, clutching my phone to me. I daydream about reality, the moments only seconds ago that somehow already feel so distant. Wonder when I'll see him again. Wonder if it'll be soon.

"I can't believe she's his soulmate"

"I know, right? I mean, is the universe sure that they're destined?"

Laughter from the two staff members pulls me out of my lovely daze. Why are they so rude? What did I do? Do they assume I don't know Korean just because we spoke in English?

A third girl working there spoke up, "C'mon guys, let's not be so mean. We don't even know her yet!"

"Yeah, but like, have you seen her?" The previous staff questions.

"Yeah, what about her?"

"She's just... not what I thought she'd look like."

"She could be listening now," the third girl said, "I think she seems perfectly nice. You should give her a chance."

Without another word she walks out of the room and into the hallway, where I was listening. I look up to her from the floor, my eyes glistening with tears.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! You must have heard them. They're like that to everyone, don't worry."

I nod and turn away, "Yeah no, it's just... old insecurities coming back"

"Well don't let them," she smiles, "I, along with I'm sure Namjoon, think you're gorgeous."

I laugh, "Thank you. You are too"

"I have to be! It's hard keeping up with my worldwide handsome boyfriend" She jokes.

"Wait, are you?"

"Minji, Kim Seokjin's soulmate" She grins.

We talk together while we watch the concert from the waiting room. Apparently she's been with the boys for 2 years, which is a little intimidating. Am I going to have to meet them later? What if-

"Everything alright?" Minji asks.

"y-yeah!" I nod.

"Don't worry, you'll be okay"

I turn to her. Did she know? Suddenly, Namjoon and the rest of the members pour into the room.

He pulls me into a hug, "How did we do, baby?"

I blush at the nickname, mumbling, "You guys were amazing"

"Were you nice to Y/N?" Seokjin asks Minji.

She sighs, "yes, but Ari and Chaeyeong said stuff about her"

"What did they say?" Namjoon yells.

"They were just being rude. Talking about what she looks like and if she's good enough for you, and...y'know"

Unknowingly, I had begun to tug harder at Namjoon's shirt while tears threatened to form. He pulls his arms tighter around me, "Hey, hey, it's okay. You're perfect. Don't listen to them, Minji's right. They're always like this. We are all here for you, we love you. None of the things you're insecure about mean anything to me. To me, you are perfect."

"I-I.." He pulls away to look at my face.

"You're crying but you're smiling.. I don't understand"

"They're happy tears" I grinned, "Because, I can't believe the universe thought to give me the luck that is you."

Written in the Pages (RM) CH7

𝄆 Namjoon POV 𝄇

"So she must like you back! What else would she mean by 'feelings'?"

"You don't get it," I grumble, "she isn't interested in me anymore. She doesn't want to hear from me."

"How oblivious can you be?" Yoongi jokes, "they must have said something that made her think we don't want her around. She's clearly just insecure, so why don't you show her how much she means to you?"

I ponder that for a moment, "how would I do that?"

"We should write a song for her!" Jimin pipes up.

𝄆 𝄞 𝄇

𝄆 Y/N POV 𝄇

It's been a week since I've heard from Namjoon. It may sound ridiculous, but part of me had hoped he would continue to try and talk to me. I guess he gave up, just like that.

I walk home slowly, feet trudging against the cobblestones I once skipped on. Along the way, I see the two girls from earlier chattering. they walk in the opposite direction, snickering at a glance of me.

I pull my hood over my head and try to walk faster. eventually, I arrive back home. The silence pulls me in, no one to laugh at me now. I don't understand, things were so much less complicated before Namjoon. Yet somehow, I still feel the thrills. Him talking to me gives me enough energy to do anything.

Then I remember the words from earlier. "They must be doing it as a joke, they would never sit with someone like her on purpose." And my heart sinks again.  I'm tired of this. I'm tired of trying to figure out if he likes me as more than a friend just to be hit with the rejection of a punchline. I'm tired. I'm tired of trying to prove myself to people who don't care.

I need to love myself. Not the version others see. I need to focus on myself, and I can't do that if I'm trying to swim in pools too deep for me. Trying to date someone I can never have.

Trying to find myself in people who aren't me.

a knock on the door pulls me from my monologue. I open it without checking the peekhole.

"Y/N, thank god you answered. I need to talk to you. I know you don't want to listen to me, but please just hear me out. please" Namjoon begs from the doorway.

"How do you know where I live?"

"I.. I followed you home, I'm sorry, can I please come in?"

"You followed me home?" I demanded.

"Yes I,.. look I know this sounds bad but please just give me a chance. I can explain everything."

Sighing in defeat, I pull the door open wider and let him in. Leading him to the couch, he speaks before I can even ask.

"Okay. So, when you left that day at lunch, Jungkook had followed you to make sure you were okay. He filled me in on what they said and everything and I just want you to know  that I truly do care about you. We all do. And I wouldn't pretend to be friends with someone as a joke, the only person who would do that is someone like those two girls who I rejected. I need you to know all this before I continue."

"Okay, well, thank you for saying that Namjoon." I force a smile, "but continue with what?"

"What I've been hiding from you for the past week," He replies. He takes his phone from his pocket, pulling up an app and pressing play. Suddenly, a song begins to play.

He softly starts to sing, "Just one day, if I can be with you

Just one day, if I can hold your hands

Just one day, if I can be with you

Just one day

If only we can be together"

The music fades out. He brushes his hand next to mine on the couch, slowly intertwining his fingers with mine. I let him.

"Y/N, I have been pining after you for so long. If you don't feel the same, I understand... but I wanted you to know. Since last spring, I've been admiring you. Your hair, your smile, the way you talk and the words you choose, how you treat people with kindness, your quiet demeanor, everything. I'm obsessed with everything about you. And..."

He pauses and I can feel his hands sweat from nerves as he fidgets.

"I'm in love with you."

Written in the Pages (RM) CH8

"That's a terrible idea, Namjoon" Jin snarks.

"I thought a serenade sounded sweet.." Hoseok said.

"He's talked to her like,, twice??? And your plan is to follow her home? Bad idea."

"Yeah, Jin's right." Yoongi adds.

Jimin pipes up, "What if you wrote her a card?"

I think for a moment, "Isn't that too... obvious?"

"What's wrong with obvious?" He asks, "It can't be worse than stalking her and singing her four lines in the middle of her house, can it?"

I sigh, "what would I even write in a card?"

"Something like Oh Y/N~ I'm so in love with you! Every night when I go to bed I dream of kissing you-"

"sHUT UP!" I groan as I cover my face.

~

𝄆 Y/N POV 𝄇

Falling in love is like picking flower petals. He loves me, he loves me not. He loves me, he loves me not. One day I think he likes me, the next I'm sure he doesn't.

Love is a beautiful thing, but sometimes it can be so hard. Does he like me? Why else would he go to all this effort for me? But at the same time, why would he want me when he could have anyone?

I might love him, but sometimes I just feel so insecure at the thought of him.

I think back to when me and Namjoon last talked. He had tried to talk to me, explaining that he did care. But I had jumped to conclusions and let my insecurities get the best of me. Was I the reason he wasn't talking to me? He must be giving me space because he thinks I'm mad at him.

I grab my phone and open it up to instagram. Messaging him, I write:

"Hey Namjoon. I'm sorry I didn't let you finish what you were saying last time... I guess I just got caught up in my anger. It wasn't fair to you"

After a while, I see three little dots.

𝄆 NAMJOON POV 𝄇

I typed out a message to her:

Me: Wait, so you're not mad at me?

Y/N: Of course I'm not mad at you! I thought you were mad at me..

Y/N: I... overheard these girls saying that you were just hanging out with me as a joke.. I know you would never do something like that! I just....

Y/N: I just started to feel like I wasn't good enough for your friend group

Me: Don't listen to them. We decide whose good enough for us, not them. I'm sorry they made you feel that way.

Y/N: Can I ask you something?

Me: Anything

Y/N: Just out of curiosity, what type of person would you date?

I pause. Do I tell her? Do I tell her what I've tried to tell her multiple times now?

No. I can't tell her over instagram DMs. When I tell her how I feel, I want it to be special.

Me: Someone smart, funny, pretty,

Someone like you.

Me: What about you? What type of guy would you date?

Y/N: I don't know haha. I haven't really thought about it.

Me: Would you consider... someone like me?

Y/N: ...maybe

Y/N: would you consider someone like me?

My thumb starts to type 'yes', but right as I'm about to press send my screen turns black.

"Shoot! My phone died!"

I'm not having another misunderstanding. Our conversations keep getting interrupted. If I can't send her the text, then I'm just going to have to tell her in person.

Tomorrow I will tell Y/N how I feel.

~

I rush into school. It's 8:00am still, plenty of time before class starts. I walk into the classroom to find Y/N sitting at her desk, a book open on her table.

"Y/N" I call out.

She glances up at me, worry painting her face.

"Y/N. I need to tell you something"

The classroom is empty, as class doesn't start for another half hour. Yellow sunlight paints the desks, slowly tilting as the sun continues to rise. The light brushes over her hair, highlighting a few strands that excitedly bounce up as she lifts her head.

"What is it?"

"I-I.." I stutter, "I need to talk to you"

She bites her bottom lip, looking down, "Is it about our conversation last night? Listen, I'm really sorry about-"

"No. It's, It's about... how I feel about you"

After a pause she bursts into laughter, "about the ideal type thing? It's okay if you don't feel that way about-"

"No!"

"Stop interrupting me!" She jokes, "it's okay if I'm not your type."

"No, what I meant was that you are my type! That's what I was trying to say before... my phone died."

She gives me a deadpan look, "your phone died?"

"It did! But that's why I've decided that I'm tired of being interrupted. I need to tell you that-"

"Namjoon! How's it going!" Jin yells as he opens the classroom door.

"NO!" I shout back at him. I then turn to Y/N, "I need to tell you that I like you. I have feelings for you. That's why I keep talking to you, why I always want to have lunch with you, why I got so angry at what those people said about you, because I like you. And I want us to be more than friends. And I understand if you don't feel the same but I just needed you to know that"

She looks up at me with shocked eyes. Did I yell all of that too? She closes her book and breaks eye contact, looking out the window at students walking in to school. Jin has a wide-eyed look on his face as well, probably surprised at my sudden outburst.

"You... like me?"

"Oh yeah. He's had the biggest crush on you since last year. He's spent the last week trying to tell you, it's really kind of-"

"Jin! Shush!" I whisper-yell.

Her small smile turns to a big grin, "you've liked me since last year?"

I rub the back of my neck, "well... yeah"

She jumps up from her desk like she's about to hug me, then stops and fiddles with her fingers, "I... I like you too!"

"Really?!" I smile too, "I.. That's, can I hug you?"

She smiles and nods. I pull her into me, resting my arms on her shoulders.

"Ew, get a room you too" Jin groans.

I pull away from Y/N, "we had a room until you showed up."

He just laughs and walks away, leaving his bag at his seat. Me and Y/N smile at each other. We stay in silence until class starts, only interrupted by our awkward giggles.

KIM NAMJOON

All my fics on RM so far 😎

Written in the Pages:

A quiet girl who only knows love as something in books meets an equally awkward boy struggling to find his place in the music world. Is there a chance their friendship can turn into something more?

CH1 - Crush

CH2 - Your Comfort Zone

CH3 - Oops

CH4 - First Fan

CH5 - I Like Someone Else

CH6 - Save Me the Pain

CH7 - Just One Day

CH8 - My Phone Died

Oneshots:

Purple Ink