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paper hearts - p.jm.

genre: fluff, college au! f2l (9k)

summary: hearts fragile like paper, tear it or don’t? (fools!universe)

masterlist      series masterlist

jimin.

your first friend in college.

in a sea of unfamiliar faces, jimin’s face stood out like you were meant to see him, like you were supposed to feel your heart stop in place with how his smile made you feel when you introduced yourself or how he hold onto that smile while shaking your hand as slowly as he could just to tease you, and it didn’t take long for him to occupy a part of your heart.

well, at least as your best friend.

“i really don’t get it” jimin whines as he wipes down the counter, you look up from typing away on your computer with a slight frown and tilt your head at his annoyed expression.

“get what?” you sip the hot chocolate that jimin graciously made for you the second you stepped into the bakery he worked at.

“i don’t get what is happening with jungkook and that girl” you turn back to see jungkook sharing a strawberry shortcake with a girl and they had huge smiles on their faces, both of them positively glowing as sunlight hit them in all the right places.

you could feel the lovey-dovey atmosphere around them all the way from where you’re sitting and it was cute, kind of cute, you grimaced a little because you were never a romance enthusiast.

or maybe you were just as bitter as jimin.

but you’re better at hiding it than he is.

“they seem to like each other, why are you so mad about that?” you scoff while masking your own not-so-nice feelings with a glare, and see jimin huff out a long breath, getting even more annoyed when you point out his obvious unnecessary reaction.

“they met like a week ago” you raised your eyebrows at the bitter tone in his voice.

“okay, so what about that? they like each other and things look good, who put a stick up your ass?” you chuckled a little and went back to typing, jimin lightly threw the cloth on the counter and you shake your head at his dramatic action.

“it’s not about that, i’m stuck doing all the work because jungkook is in love with someone he met a week ago, i shouldn’t have pushed him to her.” he scolded himself for being so encouraging to jungkook but deep down, he knows that’s not the reason at all.

“is it really that or you’re just jealous because you didn’t get laid this past week?” you quipped with pursed lips and jimin threw a glare your way causing you to laugh.

“you can just say you’re jealous, you don’t have to be a bitch about jungkook finally getting with someone” you shrugged, and jimin rubbed his forehead.

“listen, i’m not jealous, i just, can you at least listen to me?” jimin whined exasperatedly when you ignored him and continued typing, you slightly paused, nodding distractedly, holding a hand up to signal that it will take a minute and jimin huffs as he steps away.

“why do i even try with you?” he pouts deeply and you almost give in, wanting to shut your laptop right then and give him your undivided attention but you hold yourself back.

“don’t be so fucking dramatic, give me a minute and i’m all yours” you mumbled while rolling your eyes, finally finishing your assignment and saving it with a relieved sigh, now you were free for the weekend and you didn’t have to worry about your professor breathing down your neck to finish your work, you look up with a small smile to see jimin staring at you with an unreadable expression.

“what’s up? why are you being so pissy?” you crossed your arms over your chest and stared pointedly at him, jimin suddenly looks shy, nervous even which has you concerned for your usually very confident and charismatic friend.

“i feel like i should be doing that too, you know?” he narrowed his eyes as he tried to explain what exactly he was feeling and it only made you feel more confused.

“….sharing a strawberry shortcake with someone?” you asked with an incredulous expression and jimin resisted the urge to hit you on top of your head, thank goodness he liked you.

“no, what the hell? not that. i want to be like that” he gestured towards jungkook and the girl who were now completely obvious to the rest of the world, it’s like they were floating in their own bubble built with joy and security, any person in the room would be able to tell that they were witnessing love blooming right in front of them.

you’re not sure if jimin is jealous or just being a bitter old man about young love, but you knew you were jealous.

you want that too, a bubble of your own that you build carefully and steadily till no one can break it, you wanted to experience love too.

it’s only when jimin starts talking again that you lean back in to hear him, not fully listening to him but listening to him enough to not lose track of the conversation or to get out of your mind weaving its imaginations.

“i’m not jealous, i’m more than happy for our jungkook but there’s a little part of me that also wants to sit in front of the sun, completely lost in the person sitting opposite to me, i want that feeling of acting like there’s only us in the room and everyone else is just air” jimin speaks whimsically, like there was magic twirling in his words, he had a charming smile on his face as he narrated what the love of his dreams would be like.

“so, being in love?” you mutter and trail off, not paying attention to the curious look that grazes your face as you think about how love must feel like, it had to be an out of this world feeling, right? that is why people go so crazy over it. it’s the feeling many great authors have tried to explain, while they have given a peek to what love is, even the greatest couldn’t define it fully.

you don’t believe in romance however, you don’t believe you’ll ever get to build the bubble you want, you accepted that maybe one day, you might fall in love but romance might never show up in your life, because you’re simply not ready for the vulnerability that comes with the rushing strands of romance.

and you’re so lost in yourself, you miss the way jimin stops thinking and looks at you with a smaller, but softer smile on his face, the smile that no one knows about, not even you.

“yeah, being in love.” it’s after he says these words with so much warmth that you snap fully out of whatever daze you went in.

because jimin sounds serious and he’s only serious about a handful of things, one of them being sales at the chanel store, you’re not kidding, you can’t even count all the times he’s dragged you there during black fridays, and by now, even the staff know him by name, another thing he is serious about is relationships, not just romantic ones, but friends and family, he takes them all very seriously, he’s always telling you that without effort, any relationship would collapse which is why we should take care of ourself and the people around us.

“why?” you can’t help but ask, like sure it looks and sounds lovely to be with someone you care about, but why is jimin so suddenly interested in it?

“i’m just sick of seeing it all around me and not experiencing it myself, like even in the movies we watch or the songs we listen to, it’s all people seem to want, i’m just, i think i’m curious to see if it’s as beautiful as everyone describes it” you can relate to that, you’ve switched more than a few movies or songs because they got too cheesy or you just wanted to avoid something that seemed so far away to you.

“what if it hurts?” you ask, looking down at your fingers as you fiddle with them, waiting for his answer and he shrugs.

“then i get hurt” you finally look at him, mostly out of shock, because he can’t be this casual about getting his heart broken one day but jimin looks determined, to experience it, to live it, to be in love, you haven’t seen jimin this sure in a long time.

something about his simple answer nags you, maybe it’s just that easy, you just get hurt, you move on, you find someone else but deep down, you know that if you’re going to love, you’re only going to love one person and you’re going to do it right then or maybe you’re just a coward who doesn’t want to hurt someone or get hurt.

“well, you’ll get there one day” you look away from his intense gaze and pretend to keep working on something in your laptop, refusing to spare him anymore glances and out of your periphery, you can see jimin eye you one last time before sighing heavily and going back to stand at the till.

-

you don’t talk about it ever again, you even change the topic every time jimin brings it up, you know that he’s getting suspicious but you can’t help it, all that talk about love or finding your fit, made your mind cloudy, you had a lot of thoughts about it and none of them seemed like your thoughts, almost like borrowed thoughts from people around you to form an idea of love that you’re not sure you believe in.

you’re young, you shouldn’t be worrying about this and jimin shouldn’t either but here you are, two idiots aimlessly looking for love that has never presented itself in their lives before.

it has, but it’s not like you two have a clue.

you watch from where you sit in the cafeteria with narrowed eyes, jimin, who said he would be back in five minutes and it’s been twenty minutes now, is surrounded with people, the jocks, the nerds, other stereotypical people from different social groups, and he’s happily in the center of it all with an easy smile on his face.

it’s like he glows with attention, he glows with his charisma to be able to talk to anyone without wanting to run away, a power you both want and never want to be blessed with because even if you’re not all about being around people, it would be nice to hold a conversation with just about anyone, but jimin clearly doesn’t mind as he says something that has everyone around him laughing while clutching their stomachs.

for a second, you want to grab him and pull him with you so he can make you laugh like that because you don’t necessarily enjoy other people’s attention, but you don’t move an inch, you just clasp your eyes shut and slam your head on the table in front of you.

you shouldn’t think too much about this, it’s just jimin, he’s always loved being around people and you’ve never felt this urge to have all his attention to yourself but here you are, one bad move away from dragging him back to your table.

you are desperate for someone who’s already close to you and naturally, gives you a lot of attention, and you feel pathetic for thinking this way.

this isn’t like you.

you’ve never wanted jimin beside you so badly, and you aren’t sure about what you’ll talk about if he’s beside you, you’re just hoping he will carry the conversation like he usually does.

you feel a tap on your table making you look up to see namjoon staring at you unsurely.

yeah, slamming your head on a table in a room full of people probably will raise some questions about your sanity.

namjoon and you have a very casual but deep friendship, you don’t know how to explain it, but if jimin left your side at a party, you definitely would go look for namjoon to get drunk with and talk about anything in the world, he’s very open to any topic and you’re more than happy to indulge in his bright and unique mind.

“you okay?” he asks you with raised eyebrows and you nod sheepishly.

you’re just peachy.

he didn’t look like he believed you but he let it slide.

“then hopefully i will see you at the party tonight, we can pick up on that documentary about whales again?” he tilts his head, this is why you love talking with him, drunk or sober, he makes what seem like the most boring topics in the world into things that you want to be invested in, though he is much more fun when he’s drunk, and normally, you would throw finger guns and excitedly tell him yes but you already have something planned.

“movie night with jimin, so probably no, sorry joon, but i’ll come to the library in a bit, i need to pick up some books, you’ll be there, right?” he shrugs like it’s obvious he will be there because he does volunteer to work there from time to time and he leaves after that, and you’re all by yourself again.

not for too long though.

“namjoon hyung left already? i was about to come over and say hi” jimin’s voice makes you jump in your place and when he sits down beside you, you feel the all too familiar feeling of relief at his voice and presence flood through you as you exhale deeply.

jimin doesn’t notice your eyes travel across his face, taking him in like it was the first time you saw him and starts eating from the tray in front of him.

friends are allowed to admire each other, right?

“yeah, he just wanted to ask about today’s party, speaking of which, we’re still on for movie night, right?” you nudged jimin from stuffing his face with the day-old cafeteria food, he looks up with a frown, mouth smothered with red sauce and gulping down hard.

how attractive.

“i didn’t tell you?”

“tell me what?”

he furrowed his eyebrows deeper, trying to remember if he told you about his random date tonight and once he comes to the realization that he indeed didn’t tell you, he freezes.

movie nights.

they really are nothing special, it’s not like you do anything besides watch some action or animation movie while eating the greasiest foods, it’s the one-day jimin and you refuse to diet or be careful with your body, and most movie nights end with you drunk and asleep on the couch.

movie nights came to existence when your girlfriend in first year dumped you and you went crying to jimin’s dorm because you didn’t know who else you could go to, jimin knew all along that she was going to dump you at some point, he had warned you even that it was only a matter of time before you end up hurt, and considering the playful nature of your friendship, you expected him to drop the ‘i told you so’ line but instead, he scanned you with concerned eyes and silently put on the funniest movie he could think of.

boss baby.

and within seconds, maybe it was because of how much warmth jimin held in his eyes as he dried your tears and patted your head with a careful ‘don’t cry, not when you’re with me’ or maybe it was just because boss baby (tied with big hero 6, tangled and soul) was the best animated movie ever made, but you forgot.

you forgot about your girlfriend who you really did like a lot, you had a lot in common with her, and it was the first time you were dating after coming out as bisexual, it felt good, and even if you felt like you could really fall for her, you knew something was missing with you two and you even feel grateful that you didn’t have to cut her off, she did that for you.

but that day, you felt with jimin what you didn’t feel with your girlfriend.

safe.

you felt safe with jimin.

so yeah, nothing special.

nothing special about the way you looked at jimin that night and the tight feeling in your chest that you’ve been carrying since that day.

“date tonight, i won’t be coming over for movie night, i really thought i told you” you couldn’t hide your disappointment at his words, you really were looking forward to watching movies and eating junk tonight, especially with jimin, but you quickly masked it with a huge grin.

“don’t even worry about it, go and have fun, i’m sure it will go well, i will probably just watch something and eat ice cream anyway” you said with as much fake enthusiasm as you could and you almost felt like he didn’t believe you but he flashed you an equally wide grin and nodded happily.

“i hope it goes well too, i like him, he’s in my sociology class and he seemed pretty cool, we’ll see” he winks at you and he always does that, you usually just wink back at him but today, you want to bury your head in your plate of mashed potatoes to hide your flushed face. you cough and look away from him, picking your food with the dull plastic fork and your reaction confuses jimin a little, but he shrugs and continues stuffing his face.

-

“are these all the books you need?” namjoon scans the small stack of books on the counter he’s sat at and you bob your head as you sit across him, cheek leaning on your open palm.

“wait, where’s jimin? you two are usually always together” that line stings more than it should, yeah you and jimin are always together but you feel weird when someone else says it, like fuck it, you get around a lot by your own too, you don’t need jimin for everything.

“he’s preparing for a date with a cute guy from his sociology class” you mumbled with obvious disappointment and maybe even some fury laced in your voice and namjoon’s mouth forms an ‘o’ at your words.

“so, he ditched your movie night?” he states plainly and lifts his hands in surrender when you glare at him.

“he didn’t ditch me, he’s just having a date, that’s fine, i’m happy that at least one of us is having fun” your words might not be that alarming but the look on your face is, you look bitter, and like you’re ready to rip a head off and namjoon doesn’t want that to be his head so he coughs with wide eyes and returns to setting your books aside.

“what’s up with you? anything interesting?” you distractedly question as your gaze travels across the pretty empty library, it’s always this empty and namjoon is secretly grateful because he doesn’t necessarily like being around people just like you, so he enjoys the quiet and peace that the library offers.

“a little bit, i met someone in the park near han river the other day” namjoon says with a gentle grin on his face and you immediately perk up, leaning in with raised eyebrows.

“tell me everything” you whisper dramatically and namjoon lets out a laugh at your serious tone.

“there’s nothing to tell but i feel like there will be if..” he trailed off and you leaned in even more, trying to catch any details he throws at you.

“there will be if you come to the party tonight” he concludes with a sly grin on his face and you smirk, namjoon was smart, but you knew he wasn’t all that confident in the dating game so whatever was happening with him and this person he’s met, has to be something special and it’s not like you have a movie night anymore, so you return his sly grin and happily hop out of the library.

-

standing in the middle of a full room with a tight dress on with heels instead of booty shorts in your room isn’t your ideal night but you have to say, it’s not horrible so far, you’ve seen familiar faces, managed to greet and maintain a small conversation without wanting the floor to pull you in, more than a few of them asked where jimin was and it took everything in you to not visibly be annoyed.

you came here to distract yourself from him and even here, your conversations are flooded with mentions of him, you step away from everyone while nursing your peach infused drink which definitely has alcohol in it with wandering eyes, trying to find namjoon in this mess, praying to find him quickly because you will throw a chair if one more person asks about jimin.

“where the fuck is he?” you angrily type away on your phone, trying to spam him to catch his attention just in case his phone is in his pocket in this loud room and your heart leaps out of your chest when someone takes your wrist and starts walking ahead.

“sorry, you looked lost and i need to get out of here as soon as i can” namjoon yells from in front of you and you’re so glad that it’s him and not some random asshole trying to harass you.

once you’re both in the quieter area of the room, namjoon lets your wrist go with an apology and lets you know that he’s going to be back with drinks and you’re alone again.

you feel nothing but bored as you watch people bump and grind against each other, it’s only when your eyes catch jungkook’s tall figure in the room that you almost lift your hand to wave but looking at his hand holding hands with the same person you saw in the bakery, you decided against it because they looked pretty cozy and engrossed in their own conversation, it just looked like a delicate scene even in the rowdy room and you didn’t want to ruin it.

“okay vodka shots for you and beer for me”

“you know me so well.” you feign being flattered and namjoon laughs at you,

 “that i do” namjoon mutters, his tongue poking out a little as he carefully tries to place the glasses on your table and you stifle a laugh when he manages to spill an entire shot on the table with a red face and cheeky smile.

“at least you didn’t spill all of them” you mused as you grabbed a glass for yourself and namjoon playfully nudged your shoulder.

“that was one time.”

“one time but it still happened kim namjoon.” you teased and he rolled his eyes at you but still clinked your glass with his and you quickly held your hands up, gesturing him to wait, namjoon waits patiently with his glass still in the air.

“what happened near han river?” you wiggle your eyebrows at him and you think you’re kidding yourself when you see namjoon blush a little.

“i met someone, and i only know their name, but i feel this kind of connection, you know? like i was supposed to meet them” he wistfully says, his eyes sparkling just a bit as he recalls his memory and you smile at him, he sounds so hopeful and you couldn’t be happier for him.

“what do you plan to do?”

“chase the feeling? all i know is, i’m going every day until i don’t feel anything anymore” namjoon is very sure of his answer and you’re more than impressed.

“good luck with that, lover boy” you tease lightly and namjoon scoffs at the cringey nickname but then starts the ever so exciting conversation about whales that you’ve been looking forward to for a long time now.

you don’t do a lot of the talking, much like in any conversation you take part in, you always let the other person speak more and namjoon loves talking, you love listening, so it really is a perfect conversation.

you are so invested in the fact that whales actually sleep while standing, you don’t pay attention to anything happening in the room around you, you tune out the entire room, you are definitely a little drunk now because the room is spinning a little and whatever namjoon is saying with the most interest in the world, is nonsense to you at this point but you still listen, nodding from time to time to show him that you’re listening.

“y/n? i thought you were staying home” you snap your head to look at where jimin’s voice comes from, the sudden movement making you a little dizzy and namjoon points behind you and there he is, jimin standing with his coat on his arm with a surprised expression on his face.

“hello hyung, have you talked to hoseok hyung lately? Is he doing better?” jimin directs his gaze to namjoon, not even waiting for you to answer but it’s not like you would have said anything, you just play with the hem of your dress as they keep talking.

just with his presence, you feel like you’ve sobered up.

you don’t know how to feel with jimin here, people walk past him, greeting him excitedly and he is equally excited to talk to everyone.

you want his attention and he keeps giving it to anyone but you.

and you know you sound petty, because jimin would never intentionally not talk to you, he just enjoys company even if it’s unfamiliar and you don’t.

it also doesn’t help that jimin looks good, he always does but today he’s put in a lot more effort than usual, his hair is slicked back, he’s wearing a crisp white shirt tucked into his black jeans which makes him look dapper, there’s a lone silver earring hanging and he’s even wearing his beloved chanel necklace which rests neatly on his smooth skin, his fingers are adorned with delicate rings and you feel weak in the knees by just looking at him. you’re not the only one though and that annoys you.

since he’s walked in, you’ve taken note of how many people turn to look at him with pleased grins, and then whisper to each other about how he looks, some even wishing that they go home with him tonight and you just don’t know how to feel.

you’ve never been bothered about this, jimin was very easy on the eyes, it wasn’t a secret that he was easily a lot peoples crush on campus and you never cared about it before but tonight, that’s all you can think of with a scowl on your face.

“i think i’m going to head home, thank you for the drinks joon, i will send the money when i reach my apartment” you hop out of your bar stool and take your purse, not bothering to say goodbye to jimin who is more than caught off guard when you don’t hug him goodbye like you usually do, namjoon doesn’t question you, just nods and gives you his famous dimpled smile and lets you go your merry way.

jimin’s eyes follow you as you slowly push through people and attempt to leave the place, and he doesn’t know why but something in him tells him to run after you, which is exactly what he does, jimin ignores everyone who tries to talk to him on the way and catches you right outside the house, you’re looking through your purse for something and upon hearing the door open, you turn to see jimin breathing heavily while looking straight at you, and you immediately feel your palms sweat a little.

“what are you doing out here?”

“why are you leaving already? i just got here.” jimin has never been one to beat around the bush so the forwardness of his question doesn’t throw you off.

“i’ve been here for a while and it’s getting late so i’m going to leave.” It isn’t a total lie but it isn’t the truth either.

also, you keep paying attention to everyone but me and i know i sound stupid but i want your eyes on me is something that stays at the tip of your tongue and you don’t let him know that you look at him in a way you shouldn’t, you think of him in a way you shouldn’t, your feelings are making you selfish, possessive even and it’s driving you insane.

but you can’t tell him any of that, you can never tell him how you are starting to feel about him.

jimin tilts his head at you, scanning your posture, it’s just too much of a coincidence that you decide to leave right when he arrived and he lets you know exactly that.

“i don’t believe you, you’ve been acting strange lately.”

“i can’t do anything if you can’t believe something this simple, there’s literally nothing else going on” you lie straight through your teeth and you want to pull your hair out at the pure frustration you feel, your fingers nervously fiddle with the heart charm necklace jimin gave you for your birthday this year and it feels like it’s burning on your skin right now.

because fuck, he knows, he has noticed it, you thought you were getting away with it but you’re not.

“what are you even doing here? aren’t you supposed to be on your date? the same date you cancelled movie night for?” you can’t help but be petty, ridiculously petty even and you know that now, you’re definitely not acting like yourself when jimin throws his head back with a groan, he doesn’t understand why you seem so bothered and defensive all of a sudden.

“i told you i’m sorry about movie night.” jimin whines, but there is a pleading tone to his whine, a pleading tone that you ignore.

“no, you didn’t and you aren’t answering my question about your date either.” you quickly correct him and he pushes his hair back roughly with his fingers, a habit you’ve chastised him about a lot of times, you almost reach to slap his hand away from damaging his hair like you usually do but you hold yourself back because nothing feels like how it used to feel.

“it didn’t go well, we agreed that we just didn’t have that spark and that we’re better as friends, that’s all and i didn’t want to go home, so i came here and imagine my surprise, i see you here sipping shots with namjoon when you told me you were going to stay home and eat ice cream.” you scoff with raised eyebrows at how he turns the tables on you because his tone is so accusing as if you were sucking faces with namjoon right in front of him and it further annoyed you.

“i don’t need to tell you everything, you’re not my dad and you’re acting like you walked in on me and namjoon doing something we shouldn’t, and i can’t believe you’re making this about me when this is very clearly about you, you never even let me know you were going on a date until the day of” you point a finger at him with your anger practically radiating off of you and jimin just shakes his head at you.

“and you know that? movie night is cancelled from now on” you cross your arms over your chest as you say this, not letting any vulnerability show because it hurts to cancel something that meant a lot to you and jimin lets his mouth drop open at your words.

“what do you mean movie night is cancelled? you’re doing this because of this one time, just because you want to be petty?” jimin asks you, his voice raising with each word and it becomes so hard for you to fight your tears because you hate it so much when people yell at you, especially when people you love yell at you.

you sniff a little and look away from him, taking a deep breath to calm yourself down and facing him again, your heart breaks at how utterly gorgeous he looks even under this dim light, it’s like the moonlight dances on his skin, his eyes are still shining, his rings are sparkling around his fingers, his earring keeps swaying with the wind and his hair is slightly out of place but still well kept and it breaks you because you can never call him yours, you can’t call this beautiful man anything other than your friend.

“not just to be petty, i’m just done getting ditched, it clearly doesn’t mean a lot to you because this isn’t the first, but the fourth time you’ve cancelled without letting me know and i’m tired of looking like i’m desperate and following you around when you probably don’t even care about me” your voice is small and tight as you say this, and you’re not sure if you’re even talking about movie night anymore, you feel like you’re indirectly letting him know that you don’t know what this feeling is, this feeling that is burning your chest and heart everyday and this feeling that makes you want to push him away and leap to hug him tight at the same time.

jimin grows silent at your heavy words and somber expression, he doesn’t know when this argument became so huge, he doesn’t understand why you don’t look at him when you speak anymore, he also doesn’t understand why he feels like he wants to comfort you when he’s supposed to be angry, jimin has never felt this lost in his life.

“y/n, where is all this coming from? you know you mean the world and more to me” his voice becomes a lot softer, a lot lower, almost into a whisper, and you wished he didn’t say the words he did, you wished he didn’t talk like you were so special to him, because that is just fueling the raging feeling that’s settled in your chest.

“please talk to me” he begs with his hands reaching out to you and you want to run away, which is exactly what you end up doing.

“i need to go, don’t think too much about this, we’ll talk it out later but i need to be alone right now” you scratch your neck while you say this, refusing to look at him, and jimin feels his heart slip at the abrupt rejection you hand him. before he could do or say anything to convince you to stay, you quickly walk away from him and disappear into the night, and all jimin does is watch you leave.

-

you didn’t end up sleeping that night, all your mind could think of was jimin.

your skin still burned from that last look he gave you, the confused, lost look with his lips turned down and it was noticeably clear that he was upset.

jimin was always so happy and bright, he had his moments but when you were with him, to this day, he’s never looked at you like this.

and it took you the entire night to understand that the way you looked at him changed, you don’t think of him as a friend anymore and that you weren’t annoyed, you were jealous of all the people he’s talked to, you were jealous that he was going on a date with someone that wasn’t you.

you feel like someone has suddenly placed a lovesick filter over your eyes or maybe it’s how you have always looked at him but realizing it scared you, you couldn’t lose him, you would be incomplete without him and you were almost sure that he didn’t see you like you saw him, it was obvious with how active his dating life has been since the beginning of college. you don’t blame him for that though, he can do what he wants, it’s your fault being a coward with your own feelings.

you couldn’t think of one thing that jimin has done to show his interest to you in any way other than how a friend would.

that entire night, you lay with a heavy heart filled with feelings for your friend, your good friend who’s done nothing but support you, you pushed him away because of your selfish feelings and you hate everything, you hate that you somehow started to like him, you hate that now when you see his hand, you want to hold it and swing it around, you keep imagining scenarios of domestic things you two could be doing if you’re together and it only hurts you more.

-

after that disastrous night at the party, you never talk to him again, he never talks to you either, both of you don’t attempt to contact each other, instead you start avoiding each other.

you sit alone at lunch now, sometimes namjoon sits with you, sometimes it’s jungkook and his girlfriend who are honestly good company, they managed to make you feel single but still included you in every conversation but never did jimin even come close to where you sat, you’re not even sure if you’ve seen him around the cafeteria.

you stop going to the bakery in your free time to keep him entertained at work, jimin still looks up every time the door dings, full of hope that you’ve come to him but you don’t, and he’s left sighing while gazing longingly at the seat you usually occupy, he plays with the same heart charm necklace dangling on his skin whenever he thinks of you, but it only makes him sadder.

“i didn’t know beavers mated for life” you look up at namjoon as you bite off the apple in your hand and namjoon shrugs, jotting down the daily log for the library.

you started spending a lot more time with namjoon or just in general, in the library because it’s so calm here, you need that kind of calm or you might just go insane.

“and i also don’t understand how you manage a bakery and library at the same time” you point at him and namjoon chuckles a little at your accusing tone.

“it’s not like i work full time here.” he rolls his eyes and continues doing the little jobs assigned to him.

“but you’re always here.” you almost yell at him and he enjoys seeing how frustrated you get with his perfect capability of managing to work at two places at the same time and still do well in both while not feeling overwhelmed.

“i’ll teach you one day, don’t worry” and just as you’re about to throw a witty comment at him, a hand reaches out from behind you and places a book in front of namjoon, you would recognize that hand anywhere.

“jimin, it’s been a while since i’ve seen you here” namjoon grins at his friend who gives him a tight-lipped smile, you don’t acknowledge jimin’s presence, grabbing a random book off the counter and acting like you’re reading it, namjoon’s eyes dart over the two of you, you don’t look at jimin and jimin looks very stiff standing beside you, he isn’t even smiling like he usually does.

yikes, namjoon wants to be anywhere but around the two of you because the tension is so obvious, he almost considers jumping out the closest window but the fine he would have to cover would be too much for his student wallet.

“just needed it for an assignment hyung” jimin offers with a dull tone and namjoon just nods, quickly scanning the book for jimin and he notices how jimin’s eyes keep darting towards you but you don’t even lift your head, namjoon isn’t even sure if you’re breathing with how tight your shoulders look.

“good to see you here, y/n” jimin says, in a way too formal of a tone, and he looks disappointed when you just ignore him and continue reading, he sighs heavily with guilty laying his heart over and silently thanks namjoon, his steps are slow as he walks away, you immediately loosen up once he’s gone and exhale deeply.

“didn’t know you were into human beings and their many pleasures” namjoon gestures to the book you’re holding, it’s a book with sex tips and you want to smack your head over and over again with it just so you don’t have to see namjoon’s cheeky grin right now.

“you could’ve at least told him hello” he says lightly but there is a scold in his tone, his eyebrows are furrowed and he isn’t joking around anymore.

“it’s just complicated joon” you mumble sadly and namjoon takes the book away from you, looking at you pointedly.

“you should go after him and try, i don’t want you to regret this” he simply instructs and goes back to doing his work, namjoon’s right and you know it, you take in his advice slowly, jimin couldn’t have gone far, the library is huge and it takes a lot of time just to exit it, and if you run now, you could catch him.

but what would you say?

you decide that you will think about that on the way to him as you slide your chair back and start running.

what will you say?

would he even say anything back?

does he hate you?

you run and run, until you see his sage green cardigan just peeking around the corner, you fasten your pace to catch him, and grab his shoulder right when he almost leaves the building. he turns around grimly, like he was expecting that it was you.

“y/n” he says softly, but he also shrugs your hand off his shoulder, your heart clenches in place with how his voice and his actions differed so much.

“looked like you were having fun with hyung, i didn’t know it was so easy to replace me in your life” his eyes are ice cold, all the warmth you have associated jimin with since you’ve met him, disappears right in front of you and your words stay in your mouth because what will you say to that?

“jimin, why are you speaking that way? there’s nothing going on between us, you know that” you try to reason with him, and he shakes his head like he doesn’t believe you, scoffing a little and you feel hurt at his reaction, because this isn’t the jimin you know, he’s like this to people he doesn’t care about, he’s never like this to you of all people.

“maybe i don’t know, but you don’t have to explain anything to me, goodbye” he says with a straight face and you don’t understand how he seems so indifferent with hurting you, and you don’t say anything else as he takes one last look at you and leaves you right at the exit.

-

it hurt a lot that day, to be treated as any other person in the world, and not someone who actually meant something to jimin, and you can’t bring yourself to blame him because you weren’t all that different from him, you also weren’t treating him like you used to and it was only a matter of time before all that ignorance blew up on your faces.

and you know now, it’s glaringly obvious that you like jimin, you’ve liked him for a while and the only way you could manage coming to that realization was by pushing him away, which was stupid on your part but how else were you going to handle knowing that you were probably in love with someone who was your best friend?

you’re not sure what made you drive over to jimin’s apartment the very next day, maybe it was just knowing that even rejection wouldn’t hurt as much anymore but keeping your feelings to yourself will just be damaging to you and your friendship, as your best friend, he deserved to know how you actually felt, he was the last person you wanted to lie or hide from.

you shift on your feet as you stand in front of jimin’s room, you’re hesitant to knock or enter like you usually do, what are you even doing here? you can’t just tell jimin how you feel, what if he starts to hate you? or even worse, he never wants to see you again?

you could handle rejection but you’re not sure if you can handle not being around jimin anymore.

you take a deep breath as tears line up your eyes, why is this so hard? why did you have to like jimin the way you do? you can’t do this, not today.

you decide that you will tell jimin another time, you’re not ready to lose him yet but just as your feet back off from the door to turn and leave, you hear the door open and you’re frozen in your spot, your heart racing down the hall as jimin steps out with an equally surprised look on his face.

he gulps, tightening his grip around the bag he’s holding, he didn’t expect to see you anymore, not after he practically blew up on you when you were just trying to make amends.

“i-i was just going to throw the garbage” he nervously mutters, holding up the black bag in his hand and you nod while fiddling with your fingers as he purses his lips, alternating looking at you and the wall behind you before he sighed and finally decided to do something instead of standing around like a fool.

“wait inside, i will be back” he instructs, opening the door wider for you and you just give him a tight smile and step in, watching as jimin disappears out of view and the door close behind you. you never feel weird coming into jimin’s apartment, you spent half of your first year here rather than in your dorm room because simply his apartment was so cozy and a lot more spacious.

jimin earned a lot from the bakery, be it in the form of tips or his paycheck because the bakery was just very high-end, you used to love coming here and doing your assignments or playing board games with jimin, but it is weird now, you feel like you’re intruding on him which is the last thing you want to do.

you take off your coat, and settle on the sofa, throwing your head back because you can’t believe you’re going to tell jimin that you like him and potentially ruin a very good friendship but were you two friends anymore? you haven’t talked for days, the last few conversations you’ve had with him aren’t how friends talk and you want to make some sense out of it but you don’t understand anything yourself.

the only thing you’re sure of is that you like jimin, might even love him and that’s what you are going to tell him.

“sorry, that took long” jimin lets out a small chuckle, as he steps into the house and you are already sweating, you wave him off, muttering a it’s okay as he sits down on the sofa, at the other end, away from you. the distance hurts but it was appropriate considering your situation.

“jimin look, i’m going to make this quick because i really don’t want it to seem like a big deal” you jump right into it, you turn to him and he immediately straightens up in his place, showing you that he is listening.

“i’m not sure what exactly happened or why you thought that way, but you said that i replaced you with namjoon and namjoon, is just, a very good friend, i literally only talk about animals with him, me and namjoon are not like us, we will never be like how we both are so i just wanted to take that out of the way” you stand up in the middle of your explanation, it’s a nervous habit of yours, pacing around while talking and you see jimin sigh, in relief or exhaustion, you’re not sure but you continue before you lose all courage and run away again.

“another thing is, i like you, love you even, not how a friend should.” you pause, there’s no turning back now so you gather the little bit of strength that you can and continue but you don’t dare to look at jimin, you’re not ready for that yet.

“i’ve truthfully not been able to see you as a friend at all, like friends don’t get jealous which is exactly how i get when i see you around others, i feel like dragging you out of the room and having you all to myself and it sounds stupid but that’s how i feel, friends don’t look at each other like i look at you, it’s not in me to see you as just a friend anymore, i can’t keep lying to myself and to you, it isn’t fair on either of us” you put your hands on your hips and hang your head low.

you’ve said it, it’s out now, jimin’s heard it and he hasn’t moved an inch and the rejection you feel from just his stoic posture has you wanting to wail into your pillow and disappear into thin air.

“so yeah, that’s what i wanted to say, you don’t have to give me a reply or anything, and i understand if you don’t want to talk again, take care” you mumble shamefully, your voice cracking in the middle and it’s taking everything in you to not cry in front of him.

you sniff as silently as you can and take your coat, not turning back to look at him.

“y/n wait, you didn’t let me speak” jimin finally talks from where he sits, his face is as serious as it was all those days ago and you want the ground to swallow you up just to protect yourself from whatever gentle rejection he will give you.

you hold your breath as you watch him getting up from the couch and walking over to you, slowly like he has all the time in the world and you really just want him to say what he wants to before you start crying right here.

jimin reaches and stops right in front of you, you don’t look at him and his face softens at your nervous stance, he brings his hand up and you stiffen even more when he reaches your collarbones and slowly takes hold of the necklace you two share.

“you know what else friends don’t do? this” he lifts the heart charm necklace from your skin and you gape at him, your heart racing in your chest as he smiles down at you.

“i might give attention to people around me but i don’t give my heart just to anyone, y/n, and if i gave it to you, you can’t think that i see you as a friend, i’ve never seen you as a friend, i’ve seen you like a lover, always admiring and always from far away, but i don’t have to stay away anymore, so thank you for not being a coward like me, i love you too, i love you the most.” he drops his confession subtly, and for a second, you think you hear him wrong, but when you look up to finally meet his eyes, you see the way he looks at you. it’s the same way you look at him.

and that’s all the confirmation you need, you drop your head on his chest and groan loudly because you almost had a panic attack just by imagining the different ways this could go, you definitely didn’t think you would end up with your head on his chest but you don’t mind, it feels nice and warm, it feels just like jimin.

“couldn’t you have just said it earlier? i was ready to usain bolt out of here” you complain and he laughs above you, pushing your head in further into his chest and softly patting your head while circling his other arm around you.

“that would’ve ruined the suspense” he lightly jokes and if you weren’t as blissed out as you were, you would have punched him in the arm but your loved up heart can only lift your eyes to glare at him.

jimin looks starstruck, like your eyes hold all the galaxies in the world and he’s swimming in them, even your glare softens just by looking at him, he lifts the pad of his thumb to brush against your cheek in a such a tender way that you want to melt, you want to melt right into his arms.

“please never look away from me again.” he adds seriously because he’s missed looking at you, he’s missed looking at you with all his love and care settled into them and you nod wordlessly, pulling him in closer and rubbing your nose with his, making him giggle lightly.

and right then, you feel the bubble you’ve dreamed of, building itself steadily around you with the pure joy and love radiating off you two and you feel complete and safe.

you never thought you could make a bubble of your own, and you didn’t think that jimin would feel so right in your arms, and you definitely never thought that you would be so comfortable even with your most vulnerable emotions worn on your sleeve.

but you aren’t scared anymore, you aren’t running anymore, you don’t want to slam your head on a cafeteria table anymore, you don’t think jimin would let you do that from now on to be honest and you’re so glad that he’s proved you wrong, several times over, wrecked all your beliefs and still made you feel the way you do.

you’ve always wondered what love is.

and looking at jimin’s face, he looks like love, jimin feels like love too, jimin feels like something you want to fall in deeper for.

it’s like jimin is love itself.

and you have your answer right there in front of you, love isn’t some grand gesture that ends in happy tears, love also isn’t what they show in the movies, but love is definitely the out of the world feeling you expected it to be, and you’ve learned what love is, love is jimin.

love is your jimin.

a lil bad - m.yg.

genre: fluff, angst (11.3k) e2l

summary: you hate min yoongi the most so how the fuck do you end up in his tattoo shop? (fools!universe)

masterlist         series masterlist

you don’t know how it happens in every single party, but you always end up next to yoongi, grumbling and complaining but still with him beside you and even after several incidents of pouring drinks on each other and pretending it was a mistake, or just plain insulting each other right to your faces, or ruining dates for the other by fake flirting, you always end up next to him.

you never really understood your hatred for min yoongi, but it’s always been there, whenever you see him, you always either leave the room to not be around him at all or you start bickering with him until the day ends, it’s usually always the latter, he knows just how to rile you up, he knows just what to say to piss you right off, and you always give in to his stupid arguments.

and apparently, even right now, with all your friends dancing and enjoying themselves, you stand in the corner while idly mixing your drink slowly, and it takes everything in you to not roll your eyes when yoongi catches your eye across the room and starts his making his way over to you.

“what are you doing here, doll?” he asks, hands in pockets, his ever-present smirk settled nicely on his face, the nickname that falls from his mouth makes you roll your eyes, he’s been calling you that forever, no matter how many times you’ve complained and hit him for it.

you notice his tattoos peeking from the collar of his leather jacket which mirrors the one on your body. it is hard to not do a full head to toe scan when yoongi manages to look this good even as he’s half drunk.

you hate him but you’re not blind, you know that he is attractive and he knows it too, he knows it all too well.

“none of your goddamn business, min yoongi, get back to your friends.” your bitter reply is no surprise to him and that becomes evident with how he laughs at you and pulls himself up on the table you were resting on, looking down at you with pure amusement dancing in his eyes.

“they’re shit drunk, and i don’t want to deal with anyone vomiting all over me” he shrugs as he takes another swig and you turn to look at his friends who were falling over each other and laughing for no reason at all.

somewhere in you, you know that he’s lying, he wouldn’t mind if his friends vomit over him, he wouldn’t care even when he’s going to be the one who will drive them home after this and make sure that they’re safe but yoongi doesn’t need to know that you know about him.

“such a good friend” you dryly muse and walk away from him, only for him to jump off the table and follow you, you stop in your steps and he does too, making you grit your teeth and look at him with an evident glare in your eyes.

“what do you think you’re doing?”

“none of your goddamn business, doll.”

yeah, you hate him. you take back every nice thought you’ve ever had about him.

he gives you an innocent smile and it takes everything in you to not strangle him. you swiftly turn the other way and speed walk till you’re outside the house, taking a deep breathe now that you’re free from the obnoxious people and music. just when you stretch your legs out to settle there for a bit, you see someone barging their way out, almost hitting your arm, you turn to curse them out just to see jimin come out from the same way, following the previous person.

you only know jimin because he works in namjoon’s bakery, and he’s in one of your classes, you’re friendly enough to greet each other but that’s it, so when you see him fighting with the person who barged out first, and the fight showing no signs of calming down, you roll your eyes at how stupid they sound, why can’t they just kiss already? you can literally feel the sexual tension in the air and they seem to be in absolute denial about it, but deciding that it was best to leave them alone, you unwillingly tip toe your way back into the house.

the party is still raging and loud and you can’t really distinguish who is who anymore, so you just push your way through the crowd, murmuring excuse me’s and curses to people who push you, only to find yourself in the living room where all your friends are gathered. they immediately perk up at your entrance, drunk smiles gleaming even in the darkness and you hate to admit that you sense some mischief in the air.

“i was looking for you, come here, sit down” jennie smiles as soon as she sees you and pats the seat next to her, you hesitantly sit and warily eye the bottle in the middle of the circle you’re sat at.

“what’s going on here?”

“we’re playing spin the bottle because we literally have nothing left to do” jisoo complains from opposite to you and you throw your head back with a groan, at the corner of your eye, you see yoongi walk in with his own friends and you don’t even want to look up again.

“how bored are you guys?” you complain but get comfortable in your seat anyway, it’s not like you were any less bored than they were.

“just say you’re too much of a wimp to play and leave already.” yoongi’s voice is crystal clear even with the loud music and everyone starts ooh’ing at his sentence, all of them were already used to your endless bickering and they always act like they know something you both don’t, you never cared enough to ask them anyway. you rolled your eyes before setting them on him with a bored expression.

“you’re still standing min yoongi, so who’s the real wimp here?” and now, everyone’s ooh’ing at you, he looks up at you with the same smirk that always annoys you and cocks an eyebrow before sitting directly in front of you, then pins you with only challenge clear in his eyes.

“okay, so the rules are pretty simple.” you look away from him and focus on listening to chaeyoung as she explains what exactly are the set rules.

“so when we spin the bottle, the people at the ends of the bottle either kiss each other or one of them gets to give a dare to the other, and the other cannot refuse” jisoo smiles at you as she plays with the bottle in her hand and you know what’s going on in her little head, she’s always been convinced that you have a crush on yoongi but you were close to vomiting on her when she told you that, she hasn’t backed down though and if you know her, she’s probably thinking this is some magical way to get you to kiss yoongi but you would jump into a well before that happens.

“the only person i want to kiss in this room is you” yoongi wears a wide, confident grin as he points to the random girl he’s been talking up since the beginning of the party and you watch with raised eyebrows as she blushes and buries her face into his shoulder.

poor girl, you wince to yourself.

and yoongi’s drinking up the affection, cooing at her and wrapping his arm around her shoulder, not letting her go even as the bottle spins speedily and lands on taehyung and some girl you’ve seen around the campus, you have never really looked at her but she does seem a little out of place in the party, and you make a note to yourself to talk to her later, you hate that feeling of being isolated and you wouldn’t want her to feel that way.

everyone watches them with excited and curious eyes, taehyung has a huge smile on his face as he wiggles his eyebrows at the girl who looks like she wants to run away, but then taehyung reaches over and whispers something into her ear and everyone erupts into cheers when he reaches for his hoodie on the floor and drops it on their heads, the hoodie comes off to reveal one flushed face and taehyung who is positively beaming. though the kiss is over, at least you assume it is over, everyone’s gaze lingers on the quiet girl who all but is biting on her lip and averting her gaze to the floor.

“stop making her uncomfortable and spin the bottle already” you say plainly as you leaned back on your hands, you could tell she wanted anything but attention, she just had a stiff posture and this was clearly new for her, so you decided to help her out. she flashed you a quick grateful look and you gently smile at her.

and the bottle kept spinning, most opted for the kisses, and each time someone would kiss, the entire room would be chaos, with people whooping and waving their hands, you bury your head into your hands each time that happens because you can’t believe most of these people are well in their 20’s and are still this excited over seeing their peers kiss but you enjoy the energy in the air, it’s familiar and being around your friends is something you’re always grateful for.

“wait wait yoongi didn’t spin the bottle” lisa points out along with chaeyoung and they both have happy smirks on their faces as everyone nods in agreement, soon cheering him on to spin it already and yoongi surrenders with raised hands.

the bottle spins and you hold your breath because you would do anything to not be at the other end of it.

you exhale in relief when it lands on who yoongi wanted it to land on, the girl who’s been around him all night, he just looks at her with a smile and she leans forward with sparkling eyes, and you look away just when the sound of smacking lips fills the air, immediately everyone starts shouting and that’s when you understand that maybe the kiss wasn’t innocent at all, you almost do a double take when you hear a silent moan in midst of all the chaos, looking back when the shouts die down to see the girls with pink cheeks and yoongi who had a proud smile on his face.

and you don’t know why, but at that moment, your annoyance for him touches the roof.

maybe because he was oozing confidence always?

maybe because it sounded like he was an incredible kisser?

maybe because he’s got someone blushing right next to him with just a kiss?

you don’t know and frankly you also don’t understand why you stand up from the circle right then, everyone’s eyes lands on you and you shift on your feet, you hate attention, and you particularly hate yoongi who immediately looks at you standing.

“i just need a refill, i will be back, you guys play” you gesture towards the kitchen and leave the living room with fast steps, you only let out a breath of relief once you’re in the kinda empty kitchen, it still has like 10 people but not one of them gives a fuck about you, which is exactly what you need.

you spot the tequila bottles but they are empty, making you groan out loud in frustration and you want to throw a chair into the window, because how the fuck do these people drink so fast? last time you were here, there were 10 huge, full bottles and they’re just gone now.

“fucking great” you mumble and squeeze your eyes shut as you lean back on the counter.

you don’t even want to go back to the circle and see yoongi’s face or the girl that he’s with who seems to blush about everything like who’s going to tell her that yoongi will probably drop her in a week?

you stomp your way back to the living room, and sit down with a huff, not looking at anyone, just letting the game continue around you and zoning out until someone asks you something.

your eyes don’t leave the bottle in the middle of the circle, staring as it spins and claims its victims, and you only snap out of your thoughts when jennie nudges you, you are a little startled when she pushes the bottle into your hand with a small smile.

“it’s your turn, spin it” she gently instructs, and you almost just want to cuddle her and go to sleep because she’s always been so nice to you and maybe it’s because you’re half-drunk and you’re mildly irritated by everything, but you feel so grateful to her soft voice.

but her words also make you pause, it’s your turn after god knows how many turns and you want to skip it, there’s no one in this room that you want to kiss.

“see, i told you, she’s a wimp” you glare up at yoongi as he stares you down, and with a grumble, you snatch the bottle from jennie’s hands and give it one rough spin. you silently pray that it lands on anyone but yoongi.

your heart almost pauses when it seems to slow down near yoongi, but then it tilts right at the last second, you feel lighter as you look up to see jisoo at the other end of the bottle, who has a cheeky smile on her face, you lean back with your won smile because you could just kiss her, it’s no big deal.

“so, kiss?” you raise your eyebrows at her and she narrows her eyes at you playfully, looking you up and down and you giggle at her fake horny expression.

“as much as i love kissing, i have a dare for you.” you eye her cautiously as she says this, why isn’t she just opting for the kiss?

“i’m not stripping down naked if that’s what you’re going to say” you deadpan, to lighten the tension in the room and everyone laughs, taking swigs of their drinks and someone yells party pooper.

 “why can’t we just kiss and get it over with?” you whined when she stayed silent and jisoo shook her head happily as everyone’s ears and eyes focused on what would leave jisoo’s mouth, she smirks a little at their enthusiasm and your slightly scared expression.

“the dare is” she pauses for dramatics and you throw the bottle cap at her making her jump and giggle.

“okay okay, the dare is, you have to get a tattoo in yoongi’s shop by yoongi, he gets to choose which one too.”

she did not.

“i’m sorry, did i hear you right?” you leaned forward with a cocked eyebrow because jisoo wouldn’t do this to you.

right?

“i’ll go easy with the needle on you, doll” yoongi chuckles from his spot.

“shut the fuck up, min yoongi” you snarl at him and fix your gaze on jisoo again as she shrugs with a delighted smile on her face.

“hey, i could just kick you out from my store, you know that right?” you ignore his words with a roll of your tongue against your cheek and run a hand through your hair, this is far from how you wanted your night to go.

“are you going to back off from a dare, y/n?” chaeyoung raises her eyebrows at you and it feels like thye’ve definitely planned this shit from the start but the mocking in her tone doesn’t allow you to say no.

“fucking hell, i’ll do it.” you give in because again, you are never one to back off from a challenge. even if you’re really scared of needles, you can do this.

“who said i’m doing it for you?” he questions with narrowed eyes and everyone in the room breaks into scattered giggles.

“i’ll give you a month y/n, convince him and get it done.” jisoo says, triumph clear in her face and tone as she calmly hands the bottle to its next victim.

again, this isn’t how you wanted your night to go.

-

convincing yoongi, as it turns out, was the hardest thing you have ever tried to do, and you take history in college.

not only is he insanely stubborn, but it also feels like he seriously gets off from pissing you off every single time, because the minute you start to get somewhere with convincing him, he would say something stupid, you would curse him out and you’re back to square one with your mission.

it’s been a week since the party and you’ve got no progress on him.

“okay, i can do this, it’s just stupid yoongi” you encourage yourself lightly by tapping your shoulders in butterfly position, because there’s nothing else that calms you down from the inevitability of having to talk to him.

you’re not sure why you are doing so much for a dare, but it feels like this is the chance to prove to your friends that the only feelings you have for yoongi is hatred, you cannot have them thinking you like him when even the thought of him annoys you to the core.

but you’re still here, with a bag of tempura shrimp and fried rice because apparently that’s his favorite food, and as the old saying goes, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.

now, if you were reached his heart, you would probably rip it out but you’re doing what you can to get the dare over with. you ring the bell and stand back, but nothing prepares you for the sight in front of you.

a girl in just a t-shirt, most probably yoongi’s, who’s definitely not his girlfriend.

didn’t they say the girl at the party became his girlfriend afterwards?

well, at least the girl looks just as surprised as you do, and she even starts getting teary eyed and that’s when you realized what this looks like, you brought him food, pretty early in the morning, you’re dressed up well because you just like to look good, and she could be assuming that she just slept with a taken man.

“doll, is that you?” yoongi’s voice comes from behind her and you grit your teeth in annoyance at his presence.

wait, where the fuck is his shirt?

you immediately avert your gaze from his bare skin and look at the girl in front of you who’s trembling, why the fuck did he call you doll with her right beside him?

“look, i know what this looks like but i’m not his girlfriend, i honestly hate him the most out of everyone i know, so you two are still fine, and gosh just wipe those tears please, i hate making people cry” you mumble the last part as the girl sniffles and nod while wiping the tears off her cheek, yoongi coos behind her and gives her a small kiss to the top of her head which makes her grin again.

he has a girlfriend, what is he doing?

you try so hard to hide the deep scowl on your face as you watch the sickeningly sweet exchange in front of you and tap your feet impatiently as you wait for them to finish.

“come in” yoongi says simply and disappears down the hallway with the girl, and you step in sheepishly, you look around the apartment and it’s surprisingly cleaner than you thought it would be, not knowing what to do with both of them gone, you enter the kitchen and plop down on a stool.

“i’ll call you later okay” you hear yoongi whisper and you slam your head on the table in front of you because that is a very sad attempt at a whisper, his whisper is loud as fuck, and it travels all the way to you, and you’re not a liar, his voice sounds hot, it’s husky, low and if someone whispers to you like that, you know that you will melt into a puddle.

you also hear the loud smack of a kiss and it takes everything in you to keep your ass planted on the stool and not run away from here.

the girl appears near the doorway of the kitchen and gives you a bright and happy wave, you wave back at her because as much as her tears surprised you, she still seemed friendly.

“so, what’s in that bag?” yoongi walks into the kitchen, thankfully with a shirt on, and you place the bag on the counter, not saying anything and letting him look through by himself.

“tempura shrimp and fried rice, are you trying to get me to ask you out?” yoongi chuckled as he pulled out the boxes and you frown at his statement.

“don’t flatter yourself” you mumble and pick your phone up to scroll as he sits down to eat, you notice him place a plate in front of you and look up in confusion.

“go on, serve yourself, i’m not doing that for you.” he gestures to the boxes with a wave of his hand.

“this is for you, more precisely for the tattoo.”

“i know doll, just eat the food.” if you aren’t wrong, you can hear some disappointment in his voice and he doesn’t even look at you as he says that, so you just shrug and take a box to fill half your plate with the food and continue to glance at him weirdly from time to time.

this feels strangely domestic, there is nothing but silence as you two eat but for once, you don’t want to strangle him to death, he doesn’t say shit to piss you off either, and the silence is comfortable, you thought it would be awkward to be in his apartment but you don’t feel that way at all.

“i’m still not doing your tattoo” yoongi says and the door shuts in your face as you stand outside his apartment with mouth agape and slumped shoulders.

then why was he being all nice just 10 minutes ago?

you kick the door with your foot and huff out in frustration because you really cannot think of anything else that could convince him.

what are you going to do now?

what could you possibly do now?

wait a minute.

his girlfriend.

“jisoo, are you sure that the girl from the party is still his girlfriend?” you almost yell into the phone to try and make your voice heard even with the loud traffic beside you and jisoo winces from the sound.

“yes, i’m sure, she was bragging about it in class today” you can hear how annoyed jisoo sounds though the phone and bingo!

you know just how to get yoongi to do your tattoo.

-

you get drowned in your own assignments the following week and don’t bother to look for yoongi, and honestly, you forget about the dare until your dear friends remind you at lunch when you were just trying to peacefully eat your food.

and you don’t even see yoongi around the campus anymore, he doesn’t even show up to the one class you have in common, but his attendance is obviously taken care of because of his friends who work in student council, you’re not going to lie, you are jealous of that, you would kill to miss some classes and still have your attendance intact.

“hey seokjin, wait up!” you spot yoongi’s friend down the hallway and you don’t really care that you literally look like a homeless person with your hoodie and loose shorts, you didn’t run all the way across campus to care about how you look, you need to know where the fuck min yoongi is so you can blackmail him and just finish the dare.

“hello y/n” he faintly smiles while sipping his coffee, how does he still look good when he’s tired though? if it weren’t for the fact that he was taken, you would definitely try to get with him but your chance is over. you feel a little self-conscious with your less than appropriate outfit and his polished look, but that shouldn’t be your concern right now.

“where is yoongi? he hasn’t been coming to classes.”

“why do you want to know? don’t you hate him?” he narrows his eyes at you and you slump a little, how many people knew of the fact that you hate each other? it’s not like you can blame them, you both fight in full parties, word is bound to travel.

“i do, i just have something to ask him.”

“is it really important?” he fixes you with a more serious look and you almost feel nervous before clearing your throat and nodding fiercely.

“yes, it is.”

“he’s been hanging out at our friend’s music studio for a while now, you can find him there, i’ll text you the address” and with that, jin blends into the crowd of people around you while you stay frozen.

what does yoongi do in a music studio? you wonder silently with your head tilted as you walk to your next class.

maybe you don’t know him as well as you thought you did.

-

the music studio wasn’t too far away your campus, and you could walk there even with your heavy backpack, you huff once you reach the run-down building, staring at it with curiosity filled in your eyes.

you definitely didn’t know anything about yoongi and music, sure you knew that he was a phenomenal piano player and also that he was very shy about it, you’ve only ever seen him play once and it was only because he was pretty drunk then.

you look around to try and find the room that jin told you about, brushing past several strange looking men but they are the least of your worries, you have dealt with idiots all the time at the bar and in parties, you will beat someone up if they mess with you.

“doll, what the fuck are you doing here?” you hear his irritated voice and silently heave out in relief because you immediately feel safer than you did just a minute ago.

“i should be asking you that.” you look at him with raised eyebrows and watch as he runs a hand across his face exasperatedly, only to march over to you, grabbing your wrist and dragging you with him.

if it were any other man dragging you around like this, you would break their wrist but this was yoongi, you trust yoongi, and  as much as you hate him, you know yoongi would never hurt you.

he pushes the two of you into a room and closes the door behind him, you immediately snatch your wrist from his grip and rub at the spot he gripped too hard.

“okay, you didn’t have to do that.” you mumble while massaging your sore wrist.

“what are you doing here?” he doesn’t hesitate to jump right into it.

and you want to bring up his girlfriend but he looks pretty annoyed, you’re not sure if this is the time to push his buttons even more.

“i just, i was around but the real question is, what are you doing in a music studio?” you throw the question back to him and quickly scan the room you’re in right now, there’s a sound system, a keyboard, some speakers lying around and other equipment you know nothing about.

“i don’t have to tell you that” he deadpans and you retaliate a little, your posture faltering at his firm tone because while yoongi has always been rude to you, there’s a certain coldness to his voice right now that you just don’t recognize.

“you’re right, you don’t.” he really doesn’t. and now, everything you’ve done looks stupid to you, like taking food to his home and meeting some random girl, chasing seokjin on campus even when you don’t have any familiarity with him just to find about yoongi and even refusing to back down from a dare that you could just deny.

you don’t think you’re doing this for the dare anymore.

yoongi sighs when he sees your rigid posture and head hung low because damn it, he feels bad for being mean to you and he never feels bad about being mean to you, being mean to you just comes naturally to him but you just look so small right now, the air of pride and arrogance that you usually carry isn’t around you anymore and yoongi doesn’t know what to do.

“how did you find out?” he asks finally, taking a seat near the equipment and you don’t want to tattle on jin but you have no choice.

“just asked around.” you still tried to cover up jin’s name and yoongi raises his eyebrows at you like he doesn’t believe you.

“fine, seokjin told me” you squeeze out and you just hope that jin isn’t the type to hold grudges.

“you really went all the way to jin to ask about me?” jin is across campus from you, which explains why you don’t know him all that well but you did find out where jin is, just to ask him about yoongi.

but yoongi doesn’t need to know about that.

“don’t think too much about it, i had a class on that way.” you stubbornly lie through your teeth.

“no, you don’t” yoongi spins around in his chair to gather some notes in front of him.

“what?”

“you don’t have a class that way y/n, we both know that.” how the fuck does he know that?

“why didn’t you just ask me? or come to my apartment? you’ve already been there and i truly don’t understand why you went all the way to jin to ask about me.” yoongi’s words are softer, a lot less cold than before, and a lot more like the yoongi you know. which causes the return of your unfaltering confidence.

“i don’t know your number, and i didn’t want to intrude on you in your apartment again.” you answer honestly.

“but you think it’s okay to intrude on me in my studio?” the mocking in his tone doesn’t go past you and for a second, you don’t know what to say but if you’re talented in anything, it has to be the fact that you’re insanely good at changing subjects.

“speaking of the studio, what are you even doing in this studio? don’t you have a tattoo shop to take care of?” you huff and sit down on a nearby stool. you know that you’ve done a wonderful job at changing the topic because yoongi stills in his seat, not a sign of movement from him.

“or you know, just don’t tell me i guess” you add with a petty tone which has him sighing once again and turning in his seat.

“you’re really pushing the limit here, doll.” it sounds like he’s warning you but you have never been one to give a shit about his warnings.

besides, you always thought you knew yoongi, like really know him and as it turns out, you know nothing at all which has you craving to know everything.

“haven’t i always done that?” you flutter your eyelashes at him dramatically which draws a small smile on his face, it’s a rare smile, you’ve only ever seen him smile like that with his friends or when he’s flustered.

interesting.

“fine, i will tell you” you immediately jump in your place, leaning forward to listen with the utmost attention, eyes wide open and lips pursed because you can’t believe mysterious man of the campus (he gave that title to himself last year) is finally opening up to you.

“you can’t tell anyone else, you have to promise me that” the seriousness in his voice tells you he’s definitely not joking around anymore and you aren’t going to do that either, so you sit up straight and nod obediently.

“my tattoo shop, to put in one way, was a rushed decision doll, i don’t know why i thought it would be a good idea but i thought as long as it brought in money for me, i don’t have to worry about anything else but i was wrong. i was so wrong.” admitting his mistake to you, his enemy basically, takes a lot of courage and you can’t help but feel a little touched that he shared it with you. and that he’s willing to share more.

“the income was great, but it isn’t where my heart is at, you know? even the course in college right now, i don’t feel anything towards it but music, ah music makes me feel everything i’ve ever wanted to feel.” yoongi doesn’t know why he feels so comfortable telling you all this when all your previous conversations have been catty comments to each other but when he looks at you listening to him sincerely, he feels like he can tell you anything.

“you probably know that i play the piano?” you nod enthusiastically, finally it was something you knew about him.

“yeah i do, you’re good even when you’re drunk.” you beam at him and he laughs at the stupid grin on your face.

he feels like he’s the teacher here and you’re the teacher’s pet.

but he knows if he says that out loud, you will probably kick him in the leg. and yoongi hates bruises so he shoves that happy thought to the back of his head, he will laugh about it to himself later.

“i’ve been writing songs forever now doll, and i’m finally getting somewhere with it, i’m going to hand over the tattoo shop to my sister and jungkook who are more passionate about it than i will ever be.”

he looks regretful almost, like he started something he couldn’t finish but you see yoongi in a new light now, writing songs, producing music, it isn’t child’s play, you know that a lot goes into putting your emotions into words and you admire yoongi for how honest he was with you even if he didn’t have to be.

“and focus on music full-time?” you ask gently and he nods.

“that is the plan, yes.”

so, this could be why he shut the door on your face even after the tempura prawns and fried rice, he’s going to stop working at the shop soon.

“isn’t jungkook that guy who is friends with jimin?” you distinctly remember jungkook’s name from somewhere but you can’t remember where you’ve seen him.

“yeah, they work at namjoon’s bakery together.” yoongi provides you your answer easily and you snap your fingers, you saw jungkook when you went to get a muffin from namjoon, he told you he would give you a discount and you couldn’t say no to that.

“that’s where i saw him, i remember now.”

yoongi stays silent, drumming his fingers against his leg and thinking by himself, he looked insanely attractive even with that stressed look on his face, he’s even wearing torn jeans today for heavens’ sake and you feel a little hot, you pick at your collar to try and cool your warming body down.

you can’t let him know the effect he has on you.

“you don’t have to worry about me telling anyone, i won’t. your secret’s safe with me” you smile at him and he gives you a grateful look before rubbing his palms on his legs, he doesn’t know what to say anymore and he feels weird just leaving himself completely vulnerable to you but yoongi trusts you, he might hate you but he still trusts you to not be that cruel.

“so, what did you come here for?” he asks, leaning back on his chair and you freeze.

how are you going to tell him that you came all the way here just to blackmail him after he’s told you his passion-filled story?

“it’s nothing important, don’t even worry about it” you wave your hand dismissively with a nervous chuckle leaving your lips and like always, yoongi doesn’t believe you.

“it must have been pretty important if you ran to jin to ask him where i am” he points out and you hate that he’s right.

“it is not important at all.” you lamely respond and yoongi cocks his eyebrow before leaning over and grabbing your stool and pulling him towards you, so that you’re face-to-face with each other.

your heart literally stops beating when his eyes meet yours, his are filled with steely determination and you’re sure that your eyes have wimp written all over them, just what yoongi always called you and it doesn’t help that you can’t think with his breath fanning over your face in hot flashes.

“i-i told you, it’s not important” you whine lightly and yoongi has an easy grin on his face because of your stutter.

“just say it, doll.” the command in his tone is really something you can’t ignore, because not only does it make you shiver, but it also puts you on autopilot to do what he asks.

“i know that the girl that you were with, in your apartment the other day, isn’t your girlfriend” you breath out and your heart returns to its pace when yoongi lets your stool go with a frown.

“girlfriend?”

“your girlfriend is the one from the party so i’m saying that i know you’re cheating on her with that other girl.” you don’t know why you keep talking but you do, you wish you would shut up already because yoongi finally isn’t that much of a mystery anymore and blackmailing him will just put his walls up again, but you don’t shut up.

“what are you trying to do, y/n?” with the lack of his usual nickname, the sentence seems colder, just like the tone he used when you first walked in.

and that’s when you know that any and all progress you’ve made with him is gone in the dust, you think might as well just destroy it all while you’re at it.

“i will keep my mouth shut near your girlfriend if you just finish my tattoo” you have never felt more stupid in your life, because you’re doing all this while you’re fully conscious, at least when you’re drunk, you have an excuse.

“so, you would tell on me if i didn’t do that tattoo for you?” you feel even more like an idiot when he puts it that way but you remind yourself pathetically that you hate him, and you don’t care what he thinks of you, so you nod a simple yes.

“wow doll, you play a nice game, huh?” he chuckles darkly as he throws his head back and you know that while his words might be funny, his tone and expression are anything but.

you shouldn’t feel guilty about this but you do, there’s this sinking feeling in your chest that whatever you’re doing right now, is not worth it.

just when you open your mouth to take back the words you’ve said and apologize and reassure him that you see him with more respect now, that his story and secret will forever be safe with you, that you admire his passion, you don’t get the chance to when yoongi shuts you up with his.

“fine, i’ll do your stupid tattoo, now get out of my studio.” your heart sinks at his blunt words and he says them while not looking at you at all, you know that you deserve it though which is why you shamefully nod and turns towards the door, leaving him alone in his studio again.

-

the next few days are a blur, and you’re back at some stupid party.

you needed to forget.

but as much as you tried to push yoongi away from your thoughts, there’s this nagging feeling that claws at you, you don’t understand why you feel as guilty as you do, but it doesn’t go away, it increased each time he saw you in campus and turned his head away like you were nothing to him.

and you hate that you’re nothing to him, you were at least an enemy before but now, he disregards you so easily.

why do you want to be something to him?

you aren’t stupid enough to bring up the tattoo though, you just figured you would give him the chance to tell you or just not get it at all, you are not going to run your mouth again.

“oh, jin’s here, did you hear about his girlfriend? i heard she’s trouble” you hear someone mumble next to you, and you immediately look up to see yoongi with jin and some other friends you don’t recognize, he doesn’t see you though and you want to hide away, you don’t want to see him just yet.

you duck your head low, clutching your red solo cup in your hand and moving away from his line of sight, the only place you know that is safe from everyone in this party is the balcony upstairs so you inform your friends that you’re going to get some air and leave.

as soon as you open the door, you welcome the fresh air that greets you, the night is especially cold and windy but you love it, you just tug your leather jacket closer and lean your body on the railing as you think back on everything that’s been happening.

why did you open your mouth in the studio?

why did you go to the studio at all?

why are you so desperate to prove your friends wrong?

maybe your friends were right? that can’t be though, you don’t like yoongi that way. or at least, you don’t know if you do.

you bite your lip once you feel tears of frustration pooling in your eyes because you brought this on yourself and you don’t even understand why you are so mad about this like yoongi used to mean nothing to you or did you just think he meant nothing to you?

you really want to call off the dare because at this point, it’s gotten too far.

“it’s freezing here, come back in.” you stiffen at the sound of yoongi and don’t even turn around, you just wish he goes away because of how you’re ignoring him. you hear steps and you almost sigh in relief, thinking that he left but when the steps keep getting louder, you turn around confusedly only to see yoongi walking towards you. he reaches where you stand as you hold your breath and he just looks at you while you look away with flushed cheeks.

“this isn’t the time to be stubborn doll, just come in.” he lightly scolds you and you huff out in frustration.

“why don’t you go in?” you snap, finally looking at him and almost instantly shrink back down because you’re really in no position to give him an attitude. yoongi clenches his jaw, trying hard to mask his annoyance because he doesn’t understand why he can’t get his feet to just move and leave you alone like you clearly want him to.

“i told you i will do the damn tattoo, why are you still being a bitch?” his words are like a harsh slap to your face, does he really think you’re still going on about the tattoo?

“this isn’t about the fucking tattoo, yoongi!” you yell at him, throwing your hands in the air and running a hand though your hair, almost pulling too harshly at the roots.

“then what is it about?” he crosses his arms over his chest, taking more steps towards you and looks at you sternly, and you don’t know what to tell him.

“you won’t understand” you shake your head pathetically, now even more confused with the close proximity you two shared but yoongi doesn’t move, he stays right where he is, so close to you that you feel dizzy.

“you don’t know that” he fires back and up close, you can see his frown getting deeper. the tension in the air is high and both of you are breathing heavier than necessary and your eyes stay glued on each other, if you moved a little more, you would be fully leaning on him and even from your position, you can feel his body heat.

“i used to think you meant nothing to me and all you’ll ever be is someone who will drive my nail to the wall, but turns out, i was fucking wrong about that, i was wrong and i can’t stand being nothing to you and you definitely don’t mean nothing to me anymore, and i don’t even know why i’m telling you all of this when you obviously don’t give a shit.” you hold your gaze as you try to put your emotions into words, it’s a mess but you feel lighter, things are ruined anyway and all you want to do right now is pull him close to you and just hold him all night even as you’re yelling at him, as fucked up as that sounds.

“do you really want to know what’s going on?” your voice is reduced to a mumble as your eyes shift from his eyes and move towards his lips, his gaze travels with yours and his eyes land on your lips too, and before he could let another breath out, you pull his collar to you and tilt your head to meet his lips.

yoongi responds immediately, his hands snaking around your waist to squeeze your hips and pulling you closer till your chest met his, as your fingers tangle themselves in his hair, tugging lightly, just enough to make him groan lowly, and the sound sends a shiver down your body.

neither of you pull apart for air, just letting yourself getting lost in him, in the taste of him that you’ve been unknowingly chasing for so long, and every touch he leaves on your body feels like a trail of fire that burns bright.

kissing yoongi was probably the best thing you’ll ever experience in your life.

and you’re scared to pull away because you know that nothing will ever be the same again, you just want to stay in this moment for as long as you can, forever if you can, avoid reality for as long as you can.

but of course, not all of your wishes come true.

you eventually push lightly at his chest to gasp for air, fingers curling around his shirt, you don’t want to let go and he leans his forehead on yours, breathing heavily as well, his eyes are tender as they watch you catch your breath, his hands leave your hips and gingerly reach out to tuck your hair back into place, all while his eyes never leaves yours and everything feels so intimate and delicate, like it’s just you and him in this night, every sound, anyone else are all white noise.

“yoongi” you mutter as you slip your fingers away from his hair and he shakes his head, taking your hand in his and holding it to the side of his face.

“please don’t say anything” there is pleading in his tone, a wish that you owe him for all the times you’ve fucked up so you do as he says, you let him caress your hands as his forehead never leaves yours, but he isn’t looking at you anymore, you don’t complain though because this way, you can look at him all you want and he will never know.

but after a while of just letting the wind embrace you two, you decide that you can’t live in this feeling forever, especially when everything feels so confusing and neither of you have a clue about what is going on, the only thing you know is that you’re in each other’s arms and that’s it, that’s all you know.

and that’s not enough.

“yoongi, your girlfriend” you whisper painfully, your heart is caught in your throat when his fingers pause on your skin, slowly retracting back to himself and he leans away from you, hands still loosely gripping your fingers, you already miss his warmth enveloping you. but you can’t be selfish, it’s no longer only both of your hearts that are involved.

“we can’t do this.” you pull yourself away from him and wipe the corners of your eyes that almost leak your tears, yoongi doesn’t say anything, but his silence is his surrender to the situation, you take his silence to be his agreement with you, that this isn’t okay.

taking his silence and compliance as your answer, you leave before your heart breaks even more than it already has.

-

you walk around like a breathing shell around the campus, regretting nothing and everything at the same time.

you don’t regret kissing yoongi, you don’t think you ever will but you regret how it happened, you regret the situation you put the two of you in.

but he kissed you back, that’s what confuses you the most, you fully expected him to tear away from you and curse at you while wiping his lips but he didn’t, he kissed you back, like actually pulled you closer till you couldn’t feel anything but him.

you want to ask him why he did that, but you can’t. you can’t look at him without feeling complete humiliation because you might have just been another girl for yoongi, another girl for him to cheat on his girlfriend with and you feel…worthless.

and you also broke girl code, something you firmly believed in, or at least used to believe in, you want to talk to his girlfriend and tell her so that she won’t be constantly lied to but you also don’t want to get involved with yoongi again.

you push your books away with a groan and throw your pen on the desk you’re sat on; you can’t concentrate for shit and you really just want to disappear for a few days. when your phone dings, you almost throw it out the window because you told your friends that you needed space after they saw you looking dull at the party and you aren’t in the mood to party and forget even if that sounds lovely.

you grab your phone with a frown and squint at it when the bright light blinds you for a second, you curse yourself and reduce the brightness to see a message from an unknown number.

from: xxxxxxx

tomorrow, 9 in the morning, get the tattoo done or forget about it.

you just stare at the screen for a few minutes, it’s definitely him, even through the text messages, you know that it’s him, and he’s offering to do the tattoo? even after everything?

it isn’t right to go for it but you’ve got a dare to finish, right?

-

genius lab ended up being so far away from your apartment, that by the time you got to the front of it, you were heaving like a pregnant women, and you heavily grasp the handle of the shop, pulling it open with all the strength you have left. you stumble in to see a pretty empty shop, it is a working day so that isn’t a surprise, you wipe the sweat off your forehead as you look around for yoongi.

what are you even going to say?

‘hello, the kiss was great and i still feel weak from it but let’s forget that happened because that basically was just you cheating on your girlfriend?’

that doesn’t sound right.

“y/n, right?” you look up to see a younger, handsome man at the counter.

“jungkook?” he smiles and nods his head, extending his hand towards you, you shake it with a smile of your own and you really shouldn’t be smiling, considering your situation but jungkook has a very infectious aura, very bright and filled with joy.

you like him already.

“yoongi hyung is in the back room, he told me to tell you to go there” he gestures towards the other end of the room and you want to turn and run away from here, because as far as you can tell, the back rooms are private places meaning it’s just going to be you and yoongi.

your original plan was to look at other customers as you get yours done but how can you look at anything in a room if yoongi was going to be the only person in there?

“is that so? then i’ll get going in there, good luck here jungkook” you give him a nervous smile and he beams at you with a nod, eyes shining and you coo at how adorable he looks before you take a deep breath to calm yourself and slowly walk towards the room.

you’re only here for the tattoo and nothing else, you won’t talk with yoongi at all or even look at him, just let him do the tattoo and leave.

there you go, perfect plan.

you push against the door with your hip, peeking in to see yoongi with his back to you and you take a quick step back, clutching your hand on your racing heart, you haven’t even seen him fully but you’re not sure if you can stop yourself from lunging at him.

“are you just going to stand there, doll?” just as you’re about to tip-toe your way out of the tattoo shop and hopefully move to a remote island where you don’t have to worry about anyone, yoongi calls you out, with his back still to you.

how did he even know that you were there?

you clear your throat a little and step into the room, the walls are white and there’s a few boards filled with drawings here and there, and then there is yoongi who apparently has decided to wreck you by wearing torn jeans and a black hoodie.

the outfit isn’t special by any means but you already feel weak in the knees.

you decide to walk over to him with your knees still wobbly and your breath shakier than it was and look over his shoulder to see him working on a tattoo design, probably yours, you lean over to see it properly and gasp at the delicate baby’s breath drawing, your favorite flower.

“i didn’t draw it, my sister did” he mumbles as continues tracing it carefully.

“your sister is talented” you say honestly and he hums in agreement.

okay, so you two are going to act like yesterday didn’t happen, you can definitely go along with that.

“stop loitering doll, just sit down on the chair” he can’t focus when you’re walking around him with big, curious eyes and a small smile dancing on your lips, and he feels bad when you sigh in disappointment and silently walk to the big chair in the middle of the room.

but he can’t do anything about it, he expected you to be your usual self and fire back at him but you didn’t and he doesn’t have a good feeling about that.

he heads over to the chair with the tattoo design ready in his hands, he instructs you to lay down and makes sure you’re fully comfortable and his side keeps pressing against your body as he leans over to prepare things for the tattoo and it takes everything in you to not kiss him again. so, you keep yourself busy, fiddling with the hem of your shirt.

“you’re going to have to look at me if we’re doing this, y/n” he says and you lift your gaze to see him looking at you with a face you can’t read or decipher but you hold his stare as he circles around you to flicker some lights on you.

“where do you want the tattoo?” he asks, pushing his sleeves up, to reveal scatters of small tattoos all over his arms and you gulp at the visible veins on his hands.

“i get to choose?” you raise your eyebrows and he shrugs.

“well, it’s your body doll, i think it was cruel enough to make you do this, so yes, you do.”

you do know where you want to get it, you always thought that if ever, one day, you decide to be brave and get a tattoo, there’s one spot you’ve wanted it to be but you’re not sure if yoongi will be okay with it.

do you really want to push your luck here?

“are you sure you’re comfortable with anywhere?” you decided to ask him and he frowns at you like there’s an obvious answer.

“yes, that’s my job.”

“right” you purse your lips and nod as he looks at you expectantly.

“i want it on the side on my waist” you whisper and yoongi drops his head with a chuckle.

“doll, do you want to kill me?” and your face heats up at his tone and at the way he looks up with a smirk, nodding while putting on his gloves.

“then you will have it on the side of your waist, you have to push your shirt up by a lot, like right under your bra and hold it there, understood?” you do a double take at his straightforward tone, like talking about your bra is totally normal but you just bob your head hastily and agree to whatever he’s saying, trying to not make a big deal out of it but you’re sure that your red face is a dead giveaway.

“okay, lay on your side” he places his hand on your shoulder and gently pushes you back on the reclined seat, and you huff deeply because it’s only now dawning on you that you’re getting a tattoo done by yoongi, it’s going to be on your waist and you feel stupid for not just going for your arm. you stiffen under him and watch with wide eyes as he places the needles on the table, those look painful and you’re genuinely terrified now.

“scared of needles?” you nod numbly to his question, squeezing your eyes shut and trying to get rid of the image of those needles.

“it’s whatever, it’s fine” you breath out but your body definitely gives you away, your hands are shaking and you’re sure that you feel dizzy.

“doll, take it easy, it’s going to be over in no time and just remember to breath properly during it” when he gets no response from you, and your eyes are still closed, he realizes how scared you are.

“you want me to distract you?”

“please.” you mumble and he wordlessly lifts your shirt for you because you don’t look like you’re going to move but he keeps his eyes on your face while he does that, carefully tucking your shirt under your arm to keep it from moving away and if you weren’t as scared as were right now, you would have noticed the goosebumps that rise everywhere his touch reaches.

he gently holds your shirt in place and places the drawing on your skin, putting it flat and rubbing it slowly so that it would transfer well, and you feel weirdly hot, he’s just doing his job but you really want to just grab him and take him right there.

“okay, i will draw over this and then we will get to the actual tattoo” you actually shiver a little when you feel one of his hands tracing the design and the other slightly pulling on your skin so that it stays taut and you don’t know why the fuck you agreed to this because you’re clearly suffering here.

“what do you think of weird food combinations?” he suddenly asks once he’s done with the tracing.

“some are alright, i guess” you answer and then you hear the sound of the drilling needle causing you to let out a low whine and bury your face into the seat you’re lying on.

you should have stayed home, even the sound is freaking you out.

“which ones, according to you, are acceptable?”

“i don’t think mint chocolate is as bad as people make it out to be.” he scoffs at your response, making you frown.

“what is your problem?” you snap at him and yoongi smiles because you’re finally talking to him like you always do, he would recognize that tone of yours anywhere.

“mint chocolate is horrible, doll, i thought you had taste.” he clicks his tongue at you and you immediately go on a rant about how mint chocolate is too hated of a flavor and that at the end of the day, it’s just food and everyone has different tastes.

somewhere in the middle of your rant, yoongi looks at you fondly, you’re always so passionate about everything, even the simplest things, you make it sound and feel like how music affects him, and just as you’re almost done with your rant, he presses the needle on your skin making you yelp and you would’ve jumped and ended up scarring your skin if it weren’t for his hands holding you down.

this hurts this hurts this hurts.

it’s all you can think of as he slowly moves the needle around, looking at you every once in a while to check if you’re okay.

“i never got to tell you this but i think you following your passion with music is really cool and i really respect you for that, i hope you know that i will always support you on it.” you breath out quickly and if you weren’t here, yoongi would’ve cried because he appreciates your words so much, he pats your head in thanks, mumbling how grateful he is and it’s delicate, just like your first kiss.

it doesn’t last long though.

“you know, a food combination i like is french fries and vanilla ice cream.” your mouth drops open at his words, that sounds nasty as hell.

“why are you looking at me like that?” he laughs at your scrunched up face.

“what the fuck do you mean by french fries and vanilla ice cream?” you practically growled at him while looking at him with pointed eyes, can this tattoo be done anytime soon?

“don’t say shit when you haven’t tried it.” he smirks at your annoyed expression and you just glare at him.

“i don’t have to try that monstrosity to know that it tastes like trash.” you snap at him with raised eyebrows and just when he is about to reiterate with another comment, you unconsciously move, you hear him tut and hold you back down with a strong grip.

“sit still doll, or i might just drive this needle into your nerves and leave you paralyzed for life.” you know his warning doesn’t mean shit but you stay silent and stop moving anyways.

wait, you haven’t felt pain for the past five minutes, and you realize it’s because yoongi distracted you, he could’ve just done his job and leave you to suffer alone but he didn’t, and your heart swells a little.

that was sweet of him.

“how did you know that i like baby’s breath?” yoongi pauses with the needle but then continues like nothing happened at all.

“asked around” he casually replies and you roll your eyes, of course he would say that.

“yoongi, we need to talk about what happened in the party” you nervously but finally address the elephant in the room, biting your lip once the pain increases again.

“when i have a needle in my hand, really?” he looks up with an exasperated expression and you nod.

“with a needle in your hand, yes.”

“doll, all i’ve got to say is, i don’t know why you think i have a girlfriend” he laughs a little as he continues moving the needle against your skin.

wait what?

“what?”

“wait a second, your tattoo is almost over” you let him finish up while you are lost in your own thoughts, you are once again confused about everything and you don’t even feel the pain anymore, he places a patch over the tattoo after you get a look of it and you have to admit, he might not have passion in this but he’s surely talented.

he helps you sit up slowly, holding both of your hands firmly and pulling you forward till your legs almost wrapped themselves against his waist, he doesn’t let go of your hands though.

“i don’t have a girlfriend, and the only reason i let you go that night was because you didn’t look like yourself, i didn’t want to take advantage of you when you were that emotionally vulnerable, i don’t think i’ve ever seen you that dull.” he speaks sincerely and you know that he’s honest but you’ve still got so many questions.

“so, what about the girl from the previous party? the one where we played spin the bottle?”

“she wasn’t my girlfriend, i didn’t even sleep with her that night.” he shook his head as he said it and you narrow your eyes at him.

“well, she doesn’t know that because she’s bragging to everyone that you’re her boyfriend” you poke a finger at his chest accusingly and he chuckles.

“let her, i know who’s i want to be and it’s not her” your cheeks flush when he looks at you pointedly as he says that, you clear your throat and sit up straighter, taking this new information gracefully and doing a little happy dance in your heart, you wrap your arms around his neck and plays with the ends of his hair as he can’t help but grin at you.

“what about at the studio? you got so mad” you mumble sadly because you still remember how heartbroken you were that day and yoongi sighs, patting your cheek and rubbing his thumbs in circles on them.

“well, girlfriend or not, i didn’t like that you blackmailed me, doll. i had just opened up to you and you hit me with that so yeah, i was mad but i’m not anymore, okay? i know how stupid you can be sometimes” he adds the last part teasingly and you immediately gasp, pulling away from him and hitting his chest though a huge smile blooms on your face. yoongi laughs happily as you continue to try to hit him as he dodges.

eventually he gets tired of moving away from you, so he grabs your hands in his and pulls you closer till your lips meet his, your wrists stay captured in his hands as you kiss him back with every bit of your nerves ignited with a fresh need, you pull away from him with a small giggle while he wears a dopey grin.

“i hate you so much” you mumble against his lips with a huge grin, but like any other time, you don’t have a scowl on your face nor do you mean those words at all, he hums in agreement, pecking you one more time and cupping your face in his hands.

“trust me doll, i hate you so much more” he coos at you and you laugh at him because you know he doesn’t mean it either, you know that the word hate is just a replacement for love when it comes to the two of you, the way his eyes sparkle at you with a newfound joy tells you enough, and your laugh only gleefully extends once he starts peppering kisses all over your face as you try to swat him away.

so yes, you hate yoongi a lot, you hate min yoongi the most.

to: jisoo

the dare’s done, you can get off my ass about it! and guess who has a boyfriend now? 😉

could you (kiss it better)? - k.th.

genre: fluff (11.7k)

summary: will you ever be able to get over your crush on kim taehyung?

a/n: this marks the end of the fools universe (which can be read individually)! i’m very overwhelmed and excited for this final part, but i will miss writing this universe a lot, i struggled a lot with this one but i’m happy with the ending, thank you to every single one of you who’s read it, it means the world and more to me, i hope you enjoy this last part a lot <3

masterlist       series masterlist

“i don’t know what to say, kim taehyung” taehyung hangs his head low as his professor chews his ear out, he really should have just finished his assignment instead of being curious about jin’s love life.

“you are not even close to passing this semester, let alone having a decent grade, i know you take this subject as a minor but it still affects your overall score” taehyung nods at his words, wincing every now and then because he didn’t realize the gravity of the situation until his professor narrates it to him.

“you know that this could potentially harm your scholarship, right?”

“i am aware” taehyung shamefully replies and his professor sighs at him.

“taehyung, as your parents friend and well-wisher, you worked hard for this scholarship and i can’t just watch you throw it all away” taehyung absolutely hates when his professor gets personal with him.

why not just lecture him and let him go?

he can take the harshest words without feeling a lot but the second it gets personal; he feels guilty for slacking off.

and taehyung hates feeling guilty.

“because i know how much this will hurt your record in the long run, i will pass you this one time, only once” as soon as those words leave the professor in a disappointed sigh, taehyung internally cheers but it’s short-lived. someone enters the same classroom and taehyung doesn’t know who they are which is weird considering he knows all of his classmates. at least he thought he knew everyone. he carefully eyes the new person in the room, with furrowed eyebrows and pouted lips, trying to identify her.

“ah, y/n, right on time as always” so her name is y/n.

taehyung doesn’t understand why she looks so nervous but he just assumes she’s just one of those people who doesn’t like being around people.

“you asked me to come, sir?” you trail off, already feeling a blush crawling at the back of your neck with taehyung in the same room.

it’s no secret (to yourself) that taehyung has been your crush since you started university and saw him having a playful banter with the professors and just seeming to have a blast with his friends, he was simply the coolest person you saw, and that led to a hopeless crush on your side, but you also know that he has no clue about you.

and suddenly being in the same room with him, you feel flustered and intimidated, not in a bad way, more so in a ‘wow, you’re even more gorgeous up close’ way and your hands don’t keep still, they keep shaking with a mind of their own and your head is nothing but a fumbled mess.

“yeah, your assignment was perfect, you covered every important point but still managed to make it easy to read, keep it up, y/n.” you stay silent with the praise you get as your professor hands your graded assignment with a smile on his face and you bow before taking it from him.

A.

you sigh in relief and look up to notice taehyung giving you a weird expression, and you didn’t know what to make of it, you were sure you didn’t look that ugly today nor was your hair a mess, today had been a good day, looks-wise for you but then again, you imagine that a guy like taehyung has higher standards.

taehyung, on the other hand, just couldn’t understand how you don’t react to the praise or the high grade, if it was him who got an A, he would be busy getting smashed in some bar but your nonchalance confuses him.

whatever, he’s got a failed semester to care about right now.

“and right, you asked me if you could tutor someone for extra credit?” the professor asks you and you nod in response, you need that extra credit for your scholarship to hold for the next few semesters, and a little extra money from it wouldn’t hurt you either.

“yes, i did”

“what about him?” the professor points to kim taehyung and your eyes widen, but it seems like you’re not the only one taken aback because taehyung immediately turns to the professor with a frown on his eyes.

oh, he does not like the idea.

you can’t help but be a little disappointed when he looks that annoyed over this.

he doesn’t even know you so you can’t exactly blame him but his reaction makes you internally wince.

“you didn’t even ask me” taehyung complains noisily to the professor and you just keep your head low, deciding to talk only when you’re spoken to.

“you really don’t have a choice here kim taehyung, you are failing and only passing because i passed you, and the least you can do to improve is get a tutor, i would be grateful if i were you, y/n is one of the best students we have.” you feel a little bashful with all the praise you’re getting, the professor is always this way with you but you can’t take it gracefully with your crush is standing right there.

but it’s just dawning on you that you have to tutor him, your crush, actually spend time with him, help him out and improve his grade, spending time with him is the only thing you could think of right now though even if it both terrifies and excites you the slightest bit.

mostly terrified though.

“fine” taehyung surrenders with a not-so-subtle glare thrown to the professor who really couldn’t give less of a shit by the looks of it.

“good, you two can work out a schedule together” the professor says dismissively, grabbing the papers off his desk and his bag, nodding at you two and leaving the room.

the room felt suffocating with taehyung’s heavy mood and your inability to defuse it, you are supposed to discuss the plan with him but you’re not going to initiate it, you don’t want to seem that desperate, besides you think it’s better to leave him when he looks annoyed, you don’t want to accidentally piss him off.

so, you quickly turn towards the door and speed walk out of the room, taking a deep breath and leaning against a wall outside the room, you didn’t expect this from the end of your day. seeing taehyung from anywhere closer than ten feet away is definitely not what you expected and your heart is still pounding from being in the same room as him, you feel warm all over and you don’t know if you feel elated or embarrassed.

-

you groan and take your glasses off to rub at the bridge of your nose, classes were a drag and you have work piled on for the weekend, it’s not like you had any plans but it would have been nice if you could rest for a bit, and the lunch in front of you isn’t helping at all. it doesn’t look appetizing and smells old, you are not even sure if you can eat it.

“what’s up?” you hear from right beside your ear making you gasp and flinch, moving away from the sound and your glasses slide off the table, making a clattering sound that makes you flinch more.

“woah, calm down” you lift your head to see taehyung standing there with a huge smile and your eyes widen, he picks your glasses up and holds them out to you, you take them back with shaky hands and put it on yourself.

when did he get here? you usually notice when he’s in a room.

“you scared me” you mumble and push your glasses up, unable to look straight at him for more than a few seconds, you don’t think you can handle that, so, just imagine the way your heart jumps to your throat when taehyung takes a seat right beside you.

“didn’t mean to do that, sorry” he smiles brightly as he leans his face on his propped-up hand and sits wide-legged in front of you, his knees are brushing over your legs and if he noticed, he doesn’t care about it but you do, you care about the way your heart slips continuously when his skin carelessly touches yours.

he definitely looks like he is in a better mood than he was a few days ago.

“it’s okay, did you need something?” you look down at your food, picking at it with a small whine caught in your throat as you wait for him to answer.

“we need to discuss our schedule” you raise your eyebrows at him, you thought because he never got in contact with you again, that he simply just didn’t want it and you brushed it off, thinking it was probably better for you too, your crush on him was embarrassingly huge and you know how nervous you will get, so you were relieved when he didn’t try to contact you.

“i thought you weren’t doing it” your response is as nervous as you feel.

“i wasn’t but i don’t have a choice” he chuckles awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. he looks ridiculously attractive in his simple oversized t-shirt and cream-colored trousers and his awkward habit is endearing, your cheeks flush as you look away from him and back to your food.

“can we talk about this after i’m done eating?” you never really prepared yourself to have a conversation with him so you just wish he leaves you alone for now and comes back when you’re not feeling and looking like shit.

“you’re going to eat this?” taehyung murmurs in disbelief, side glancing the less-than-appetizing food in your tray.

“i don’t have a choice” it feels weird to repeat his words to him but from what you can see, he doesn’t think too much about it which is a huge relief.

“yes, you do” he says with a sigh, getting up and you look up at him with scrunched eyebrows.

“you’re coming to lunch with me and don’t worry, it’s my treat, one of many now that you’re my tutor” he grins easily at you, grabbing your backpack from the seat and eagerly waiting for you with bright eyes and his entire posture is relaxed, like having lunch with a stranger is totally okay with him.

is this what extroverts are like?

why was he so comfortable with you? this is your second time meeting and you didn’t even speak directly the first time.

it didn’t seem like he was asking you to come either, more like just waiting for you to join him, so you get up with a stammer in your step, anything that is not your college lunch is something you would welcome happily and lunch with taehyung doesn’t seem like a bad idea, not yet.

but you’re nervous, though one thing that saves you is that you have always been good at hiding how you feel.

taehyung smiles at you one last time, so easily, so beautifully, like it wouldn’t make you stutter, before turning around and leading the way, with your backpack slung over his shoulder, you feel too shy to ask for it and that you will probably stutter through your words when you speak to him, so you just silently follow him out of the cafeteria, ignoring the weird looks you two got on the way out.

you cautiously step into the classy bakery that taehyung takes you to, he tried to make conversation on the way but your answers were so short that even you felt embarrassed, taehyung though, didn’t look like he cared, if he found you awkward, he didn’t show it and you were grateful to him for that.

“namjoon hyung is the manager here, so i can get us a pretty discount” he winks at the end of the sentence, obviously as a joke but you can’t help how flustered you feel with a simple wink.

you are eating lunch with your crush who you thought was way out of your league, is something you have dreamed about, you never actually expected to sit across taehyung as he talks animatedly about how good the coffee and desserts are here.

judging by the fruity and addictingly sweet smell that fills the air around you, you don’t question his praise, your own mouth waters at the thought of the pretty pastries you see lined up right at the counter and the coffee bean smell is so soothing, you might have just found your favorite place that wasn’t your apartment.

a waiter (you can’t believe he’s a waiter with how handsome he was) comes up to you both but taehyung already seemed to know the guy who groaned as soon as he saw taehyung, taehyung leans back lazily in his seat with an ever-present grin on his face.

“why do you come back with a new girl every week?” the pouty guy whines at taehyung and your eyes widen with your head still down, so you’re not the first one he’s brought here, it was foolish of you to think so as well and taehyung playfully swats at the guys arm, his grin unwavering and you only purse your lips at the empty table.

god, you want to run away.

“order whatever you want” he gestures to the menu and you quickly scan over it, a low squeal in your throat when you see that they have your favorite, pho and fudge brownies. you lift your head to tell taehyung to see him in an animated conversation with the waiter, nudging him from time to time and just looking like he was having the time of his life, like he always does, you lightly tap the table to get his attention and he immediately abandons the conversation and leans over, making you move back at the sudden movement, he only seems amused by your reaction.

“you’re a little quiet, so i just wanted to listen to you better, what did you decide on?” he explains simply and you can’t help but gaze into his eyes as he keeps them steady on you, for someone like him, eye contact isn’t a problem, isn’t a big deal but it makes your heart pound, you nod slowly and mumble your order, sinking back into your seat.

“excellent choice, pho and brownies for two, and is it alright if i order the drinks?” he turns to you for confirmation and once he’s received a mumble of agreement, turns back to the waiter.

“two peach iced teas” and with that, the waiter leaves but not without smacking taehyung one last time. taehyung pretends that he’s in a lot of pain and winces childishly which has you holding back a smile as the waiter shakes his head at him before disappearing to the back, your eyes curiously follow him to the counter where all the desserts are laid out.

taehyung is quick to catch your wandering eyes and finds it funny that since he’s met you, the only time he’s seen you smile is when you’re looking at desserts.

“you want to take a look?” taehyung walks towards the counter, which has you trailing behind him. you slowly take in the view of all the chocolate pastries that could be in your stomach and taehyung stays right at your back, watching you move around excitedly and admire them.

“are you into baking or something?” he finally asks after five minutes of you moving around him with big, fascinated eyes.

“no, i just like to eat” your answer comes out before you can even think about it and you only realize it when taehyung breaks into a chuckle at your words, making you shuffle on your feet, clearing your throat and looking back at the especially good-looking tiramisu.

“are you always this quiet or is it just with me?” the question takes you off guard, and you think taehyung is upset but there is no hint of frustration or annoyance on his face, only genuine curiosity.

“i don’t like to talk much, it’s nothing against you i promise” you try to reassure and be as honest as you could.

“that’s a relief” he smiles and walks back to the table where your food is waiting, you walk back with a bounce to your step because you haven’t been this hungry in a while. and as soon as you sit down, you reach for your steaming bowl of pho and sigh in bliss.

taehyung notices your exaggerated reactions to your food and simply smiles to himself.

something about you, he likes it, he doesn’t mind being the only one talking the entire time, he doesn’t mind how you only seem to talk when spoken to, it’s new to him, he’s always surrounded by people just as extroverted as him, so this isn’t something he’s used to but taehyung doesn’t mind.

taehyung doesn’t mind at all.

-

you walk home with rosy cheeks that day, because you can finally confirm that taehyung is just as charming, just as care-free as he looks, and he’s very good company, usually people get annoyed that conversations with you feel one-sided and you don’t blame them but it’s freeing with how comfortable taehyung tried to make you feel.

it isn’t very good news to the crush you already have on him; you feel like it’s grown ten-fold. and it’s only the second time meeting him, you are nervous for your poor heart which jumps with every glance he gives you.

and with the schedule you two planned, consisting of meeting up almost every other day because taehyung simply wants his grades to not be on the ground, you are sure that your heart only will go through so much more.

your nerves don’t calm down as your legs bounce up and down below the table at the library you’re sat at, your lip hurts from how much you’ve bit it as you anxiously look around for taehyung who is yet to show up for your first tutoring session. you can’t look like this in front of him so you’re doing whatever you can to be as normal as you can be.

you have to get over him at some point, you can’t tutor him while giving him heart-eyes.

“hey!” a bright greeting comes from behind you and you almost fall out of your seat, your elbow slips on the table and your chin hits the table, as if scaring you at lunch back then wasn’t bad enough, you begrudgingly think and groan at the pain on your chin.

taehyung does nothing to help and just sits down beside you with a happy hum, his books dropping in front of him in a heap and his smile doesn’t budge even when you glare at him while rubbing your chin.

“do you have to scare me every time?” you whine, your chin already becoming sore, you’re in enough pain to not have the mind to worry about how stupid you just looked. he simply shrugs at you.

“do you have to get scared every time?” comes his almost immediate retort and how will you argue with that logic while processing how close these library seats are next to each other? your reply comes with a roll of your eyes, though you’re sure that your cheeks are as warm as the sun blaring outside.

taehyung finds absolute satisfaction and amusement from your reaction and it shows in the way he leans back proudly in seat as you pretend to jot down notes, at this point, you don’t even know what you are writing anymore but you’re writing.

suddenly, just as you’re about to finally stop acting like you’re busy and get back to him, your glasses are snatched from your face and you don’t even have to look to see who took it. taehyung twirls the glasses in his hands with a smug grin, and then puts them on, wiggling his eyebrows and pouting every now and then. and you feel your heart burst with how cute he looks.

if it was anyone else, you are sure you would have hated it. but it’s taehyung and you don’t think you could ever hate him.

you watch with curious eyes as he gets all serious and grabs a book, writing with an invisible pen furiously. you tilt your head because you don’t quite understand what he’s doing.

it takes quite a second to dawn on you that he’s actually imitating you.

“look at me, i’m y/n, star student” he squeals in a high-pitched voice that most definitely is not yours.

your mouth falls open in offence, and even before you could think about it, you swat his arm with a loud complaint leaving your lips, as he laughs at you, pushing your hand off and continuing to act like he was you. you groan and throw your head back in annoyance, though you really don’t feel as annoyed, you just feel a hundred times more comfortable with taehyung now.

after a string of complaints from you, taehyung finally gives your glass back but instead of just handing them back to you, he slides them on your face himself and you feel every bit of you twisting and turning at the simple action. you cough awkwardly into your hand and turn away from him, moving your books out of the way so you could get started.

“which subject do you want to start with?” as a response, taehyung drops a thick book right in front of you.

art history.

tricky but you can work with it.

“okay, how much do you know already?” you ask him and he thinks with lips pushed into a pout.

“can i be honest?”

“of course.” you nod at him.

“i know nothing, i slept through all the classes” he admits sheepishly and you giggle a little at his confession.

of course, not to be creepy or anything but you knew about this, you have unconsciously turned to see him in class more than a few times, only to see him passed out on his bench with his backpack covering his head.

“that’s alright, one thing that’s helped me with art history is memorizing it all like a story” you let him in on your secret, you always envision history like a story book, or a tv show that you’re invested in, thinking up characters in actual scenes, it helps you remember a lot better than just book material.

so, you tell him the same thing, you start explaining in brief various parts of print culture, origins of different eras, the rise of modern art that we usually see today, and artists that revolutionized the world of art, all in the form of a movie that taehyung intently listens to.

you didn’t expect him to listen as well as he did, but he stays quiet for the most part, politely lifting his hand to ask questions like he was in an actual class which made you grin the first time and taking notes when something seemed complicated.

by the time you’re done, it’s almost dinner time and the library is much emptier than it was before but taehyung still looks excited to learn more. it’s endearing how he listens to you like nothing else matters and makes you feel the tiniest bit special.

“that’s it for today” you announce with an exhausted smile on your face and taehyung stretches his sore limbs while yawning.

“that was a lot but it is more fun when you explain it” he drops the compliment casually, no regards to how that makes your nerves dance in sheer excitement.

“i’m glad you enjoyed it” you mumble shyly while packing your books into your bag. you get up, throwing it over your shoulder and look at taehyung only to see him already looking at you.

“i’ll go now, goodbye taehyung” your voice unwillingly pitchy at the end.

“goodbye, y/n” he repeats in the same tone as you and you roll your eyes yet again while walking away from his gleeful laughter and right outside the library, you break into the biggest grin ever, the butterflies in your stomach raging and tumbling over themselves because you simply can’t believe that the last couple of hours are real.

how will you ever get over him?

-

you groan as you plop down in your seat, you slept weird last night and your neck cramp still hasn’t gone away, your body aches all over, you don’t even know why, walking feels like you’re carrying a million stones and honestly, you would be anywhere but here if you had the chance.

there’s still a good 20 minutes left before class starts so you rest your head on the table and pray that you aren’t sick, you still have taehyung’s class today and it would be rude to cancel on only your fifth session with him.

just then, taehyung walks into the classroom, seemingly bustling with endless energy, surrounded by his friends who are just as bright and loud as he is, and with your head still on the table, you admire him. he’s wearing this red hoodie today and his hair looks very soft beneath, a quick thought that he looks perfect to cuddle comes to you and you want to slam your head on the table to stop thinking about him.

he suddenly glances around the room, as if he’s looking for someone and you try to lift your head from the table to look away but you feel way too weak to do anything so he catches your gaze, his face breaking into a huge grin as he waves at you gleefully, you slowly wave back, mentally wanting to disappear.

and you think that’s it, he will go to his seat and you will have to finish this class while looking like you’re going to die any minute.

but you were so wrong.

as soon as your hand drops back on the table, taehyung starts walking towards you, where his usual seat is definitely not there and stands right beside you with a worried look on his face.

“oh, hey” you try to cover your face a little more with your hoodie and your heart gets caught in your throat when taehyung pulls a chair to sit right by your side. you look like crap right now and the last person you need seeing you like this, is kim taehyung.

“you don’t look okay” he mutters with scrunched eyebrows and before you can say anything, he presses his hand to your forehead and your eyes go wide as he flips his hand and holds it there for a second.

“you’re literally burning, how long have you had a fever for?” he pulls his hand away and you finally feel like you can breathe again.

“i don’t know, woke up sick” you strain your answer, your head lulling back to fall on the bench, now that he’s confirmed you have a fever, you feel even sicker.

“come on, let’s go” taehyung gets up suddenly, gathering the books on your table and shoving them into your bag, then taking your backpack and his in one hand, looking at you expectantly.

“go where?” you frown up at him, class is going to begin in 10 minutes now, where could you possibly go without missing it?

“i’ll take you home” your mouth drops open at his words.

“but class is going to start” you try to reason but get interrupted with your own cough and he only looks more concerned.

“you shouldn’t care about class with a fever like that” he scolds lightly, taking your wrist and helping you up to stand, and you almost fall down in a slump again if it weren’t for him holding you.

maybe you are sicker than you thought.

“what will we even tell the professor?” you almost shout at him as he pulls you towards the back exit of the classroom, and when the two of you are out, he checks to see if there’s anyone else in the hallway and turns to you with a coy smile.

“who said we’re telling them?” is the last thing he says to you before he ducks and runs, pulling you with him but you don’t stop him or complain anymore, you know that it’s not only because you’re sick everywhere, maybe the thought of skipping classes shouldn’t have excited your tired body that much but the thought of skipping classes with taehyung made your body flush in new-found energy.

so, you let him pull you all the way out of campus, ducking here and there when you see a teacher or person in charge, giggling at each other with wide eyes only to shush each other the next second whenever there was a narrow escape, whispering your address to him part-by-part and him having to support your sick body from time to time.

even if it was wrong, and something you promised to yourself that you would never do, skipping classes with taehyung, with his hand securely around your waist (that had goosebumps trailing on your skin), even just as an acquaintance to you, felt better than anything you’ve experienced in your life. hell, he didn’t even feel like an acquaintance anymore, whether it was because of your raging crush on him, or just taehyung being taehyung, you’re not sure.

the pure adrenaline in your body had you gasping for more, more of what?

you are not sure.

you two eventually make it to taehyung’s car in the parking lot. he gently pushes you into the passenger seat and slides into the driver's seat, only to find you knocked out with your head on the window. and with one final look at your peaceful face, he drives away with a fond smile of his own. taehyung doesn’t know what he’s feeling either.

and the next time you open your eyes, you feel just as sick and it’s late afternoon and you’re in your bed, still in the clothes you wore to college, you sit up too quick, instantly whining at the throbbing in your head while looking around with confused eyes.

when did you even get home?

“oh good, you’re awake” taehyung emerges at your door, seemingly out of nowhere and you jump in your place, clutching at your heart as you look at him with a gulp.

“w-what are you doing here?” you ask as he stays at the entry to your room.

“you fell asleep in the car and i didn’t want to wake you so i found keys in your bag and brought you up here, i hope that’s alright” he looks nervous for the first time since you’ve met him as he waits for your reaction with pursed lips. he doesn’t want you to feel uncomfortable with the situation, he just couldn’t wake you when you were both sick and looking as cute as you did in your lilac hoodie.

“did you..carry me? all the way up here?” you mumble worriedly.

“of course, how else would i bring you?”

wow, he says it so simply.

“you really didn’t have to do all of that, i’m sorry if it was a lot of trouble, i really appreciate it, thank you taehyung” you say with disbelief clear in your voice and with your jaw slightly slackened because you really can’t think of anything but a mental image of taehyung having to carry you because your lazy ass fell asleep in his car and didn’t get up. and you really want to bury yourself six feet under.

“can i come in?” he asks, polite as ever and you don’t even think before nodding, he slowly walks inside, sitting right by the edge of your bed, maintaining distance between you as if he didn’t put you on the bed himself.

he reaches forward and puts his hand against your forehead, and you feel your breath being taken away just like the first time and he hums while pulling it away.

“it’s better than before but sleep for the rest of today” he instructs you and gets up from the bed, you don’t want him to leave. something in you wants to make taehyung stay by your side but you don’t have anything that will make him stay so you just watch him walk himself out of your room.

“i got a few pills, they’re in your kitchen, you shouldn’t move around right now but take them once you get up, and don’t worry about it, i need my tutor to be healthy and well, don’t i?” he winks at the end of it as if to finally nail your heart to him only and then turns to leave with a loud goodbye and a wave of his hand.

you go to the kitchen after he leaves and just like he said, pills for headache and body aches are spread out on your tiny dinner table, along with packets of instant soup. you feel overwhelmed because even people who are close to you, have never done so much for you and taehyung did, taehyung did all this after just meeting you a few times.

and you’re left, head in hands, with so much to process that you don’t know where to begin.

-

taehyung never came late to your tutor sessions or waste too much time, sure he still fooled around, his favorite thing to do being constantly taking your glasses off you and playing with them whenever he gets too bored or snatching your books away and forcing you to talk about anything that was not related to your studies.

you still felt bashful the first day you met after the whole sick episode, but he didn’t even bring it up, just continued with everything like it didn’t even happen which you were grateful for, though a little disappointed, because that is the most anyone has ever done for you and you wanted to thank him properly even if he said that lunch at his favorite place would suffice for him. but you were also sure that you would end up accidentally confessing to him if you brought it up. so, you just never brought it up either.

you talked a lot, mostly about things that had nothing to do with subject but you enjoyed them, taehyung valued and respected your opinions, actually listened to you when you talked so you were comfortable to be not as quiet as you usually are, still shy but holding a conversation as much as you could and taehyung would pick up anything you left, starting a whole new conversation with whatever, you handed him.

it wasn’t hard for your crush on him to only escalate further, not when he looked as good as he did from a side angle, it was honestly unfair that he looked stunning with a simple shirt and trousers. he looked good in anything, and what he looked like during your studying sessions, was something you always daydreamed about.

like right now.

“are you even listening to me?” a hand waves in front of your face, and you jerk in your place, quickly sitting up straight.

maybe you shouldn’t daydream about him when he’s beside you.

“um of course, i was” you lie easily with a firm nod to make it further believable but taehyung is sadly too good at detecting honesty or lack thereof. so, when he continues to stare at you, a way of making you say it yourself, you can do nothing but oblige.

“alright, i didn’t listen to you, what were you talking about?” with your admittance, taehyung leans back in his chair with a smirk.

“what is it?” you urge him once again and he shrugs.

“you know, we started with art history, right?”

“yeah, we’ve almost covered everything, at least i think so” you tilt your head as you mumble those words, reaching for your planner where all the topics are written, and you start looking through them to see which ones you still have to cover.

then the planner is snatched from your hands, and you follow the planner with a whine, bending over your chair to reach it and it isn’t until you feel someone way too close to you that you pause to see your position. you are half leaned over his chair and one wrong move could end up with you on top of him, you immediately sit back in your chair, tightening your fingers on your cardigan and frantically pushing your glasses up.

taehyung, thankfully doesn’t look uncomfortable, maybe a little shocked with how wide his eyes were but that was it, he quickly recovers and gives an easy smile.

“i have a test tomorrow” why is he smiling about that? doesn’t he hate tests? you quirk an eyebrow as his smile only grows bigger.

“how do you think it will go?”

“about that, if i do well, don’t you think that, as my tutor, you owe me something, a reward of sorts?”

so, that is why he’s smiling so big.

normally you would refuse blatantly and move on, but you can never say no to taehyung and you want to at least hear him out before you turn him down.

“if you do well” you emphasize and he waves his hand like he isn’t worried about that, but you are worried about what he would ask of you.

“come to a party with me” his request is simple enough.

and you’ve been to parties, only to completely hate it unless you got drunk enough to forget it all the next morning. though it has been quite a while since you’ve been to one.

a party with taehyung? taehyung, who probably knew every single person in the room while you don’t know anyone at all?

“only if you get an A” is your predicament, taehyung has improved a lot but not enough to get an A which is why your predicament is perfect, you’re not saying no but you’re not saying yes either.

but taehyung looks confident, with a light shrug to your rule like it didn’t mean anything at all, it only scares you a little bit that maybe your rule will be useless at the end.

“i’ll let you know when i get the grade”

-

“i got an A!” comes taehyung’s cheerful voice through the phone and the first thing you feel is pride bloom through you because he must have worked so hard to get that A, you were sure it wasn’t easy at all for him and the second thing you feel is dread, because this means you have to go to the party now.

“you did great, taehyung” you sincerely reply and you hear his sigh of happiness which makes you smile too.

you’re happy that he’s happy.

“you know what this means right?” his words laced with cockiness that come from his first ever A.

“i’ll never leave you at the party, you can get as drunk as you want and i will be your ride” he says almost immediately after as if he knew that you were going to find some way to get out of this, and you internally groan because he’s made all the promises that could convince you.

and like mentioned before, you can never say no to taehyung.

“when is it?”

-

“you look great!” taehyung compliments you as soon as you get into his car and you feel yourself freeze at his good-natured comment, only being able to shyly nod at him.

but if you had to choose on who looks good here, it would definitely be taehyung.

he was wearing a fashionably torn t-shirt with a leather jacket and tight dark grey jeans which had you feeling even more flustered than usual, he was usually attractive but today, you were sure that he was planning to take someone home, it would be a shame if he didn’t. he hands you his pale blue hoodie to hold, saying he brought it if he ever needed a change and trusted you to keep it away from drinks that can stain it, gives you one last smile and drives away.

the party was roaring even from the outside, people littered around the lawn, holding their drinks and you could hear the music all booming under your feet, you nervously pulled on the hem of your black dress as you went closer to the addictive but disgusting smell of alcohol and sweaty bodies.

so many people.

taehyung gripped both your arms on the sides as you gripped his hoodie tight in your hold, and he walked behind you, silently guiding your steps and greeting people joyfully on the way, it was a shame that you could only hear his happy voice but not see him under these alluring lights, you were sure that he looked better than ever under these blue and purple lights that made everyone look untouchable and beautiful.

“who’s the girl, taehyung?” someone shouts at him and you keep your gaze steady, not even wanting to turn around to see who yelled it, you anxiously wait for taehyung’s answer.

“my tutor” he yells back with a grin and you assume that the person has gone when taehyung gets right back to pushing you two through the crowds, apparently not noticing how your shoulders immediately slouch at his answer and how you aren’t even walking anymore, just being pushed around by everyone.

and for the first time since you’ve met taehyung, you feel disappointed.

you know now that your growing crush on taehyung will only end in your heartbreak.

he could have said you were a friend, or even an acquaintance, he’s been in your apartment for fucks’ sake, you would have been okay with anything really but the way he described you just made you feel so…unimportant. like you held no significance in his life, just another person for him to forget as he goes to spread his arms around the rest of the waiting world.

and you can’t be mad at him because you know it’s true, you are just tutoring him, he’s only doing this because he has to and not because he wants to, and as soon as this obligation expires, so will your time with him.

“hey, you okay?” you feel him whisper against your ear, hands still tight around your arms and you’re suddenly too aware of how close you two are, it hurts, being this close to him and not being able to call him anyone special to you, hurts a lot more than you imagined.

so, you shake his grip off, if you aren’t important to him, you will make him nobody in your life as well. you have to.

“yeah, i’m fine, where are the drinks?” try as you might, your voice just didn’t carry the softness it always has and even if you tried to conceal your sour mood, it didn’t work because taehyung immediately raised his eyebrows but shows where the drinks are anyway. you walk away from him, not really bothered anymore that you didn’t know anyone here, you just wanted to do exactly what you planned for.

drink and forget.

because taehyung just handed you rejection on a silver platter.

and you can’t take it gracefully when he’s right beside you. so, you had to go away before you could remember all the things you liked about him that could keep you pining.

taehyung felt…weird? he didn’t understand why you suddenly stopped talking to him in that sweet tone that comes naturally to you, he also doesn’t understand why you’re walking away from him to fend for yourself in a party where you don’t know anyone, he doesn’t know if he has done something to upset you and he felt…guilty.

taehyung felt guilty for a reason he didn’t know.

and taehyung hated feeling guilty.

to shake his own weird feeling off, he disappears into the crowd, to find anything or anyone who can drown his guilt away.

after a few shots of straight vodka, you find that you are not getting drunk at all, it’s either your overwhelming emotions that keep you from completely losing it or just your high tolerance.

it sucks because no drink is stronger in this place, you want to go home, you want to go back to when you didn’t come to this party where taehyung called you nothing to him. while he didn’t say that exactly, he definitely implied it. just then, you see him approaching you with a girl on his arm, no surprise there and you almost rolled your eyes at how predictable he could be.

“we’re playing this game; thought you would like to join?” taehyung trails off.

how nice of him to include his charity case for the game, you bitterly think to yourself but get up to go with him anyway, you can’t leave until he decides to go so you might as well play some game instead of wasting more alcohol that does nothing for you. so, you hop out of your seat and walk to him, greeting the girl next to him, you can be bitter to him but not to this girl who’s done nothing, she smiles back and then you’re leaving the kitchen.

you don’t say anything as you walk behind him into a living room where people sit in a circle, it’s noisy, there’s a bottle in the middle and you hate that you know what’s going on here.

it looks like a recreation of your middle school birthday party.

taehyung sits down, patting the spot next to him, and you look around to see if there’s place anywhere else but with nowhere else, you sit down beside him and the girl who he has with earlier is not around you anymore. he still looks at you, confused as ever and once you get comfortable in your position, he takes his hoodie from your hands and covers your bare legs with it which has you looking away with a red face.

he was making it so hard to get over him.

by the time you look back at the circle, it starts slowing down and your jaw drops open when it falls on you and taehyung.

everyone starts cheering at the bottle claiming its very first victims, and you never feel more out of place with people you don’t even know cheering you on to kiss taehyung and as for taehyung, he has a huge smile on his face which has you squinting with confusion at him. he calmly takes the hoodie from your lap, lifting it and pausing when he sees your face.

“trust me?” he whispers to you; his voice is almost drowned out in the loud music and people around you but you still hear it.

you shouldn’t trust him, you don’t want to but you don’t have a choice in this room full of unfamiliar people, so you just give him a meek nod which no one else notices.

then he drops the hoodie over the top of your heads, your bodies moving closer on their own accord, his palm now resting on your bare thigh and you’re face to face with the man you can’t get over no matter what you do. the heavy hoodie resting on your heads forces them closer as well, you can feel his breath on your cheek and he smells addictive this close, like cologne and pure sin with candy on his breath.

will he kiss you?

taehyung doesn’t say anything, just looks at you like he’s trying to figure you out, like he needs to figure you out, for the first time, he doesn’t look as confident, he doesn’t look full of life, just looks at you with such vulnerability like he’ll give you his heart if you stay under for too long, and your nerves and body are too frozen to even dare to look back at him.

after a few seconds which really felt like eternity, he pulls the hoodie from on top of your heads, the cold rush of air pushing you two apart, baring you to the waiting people in the room who roar and cheer louder than ever when taehyung smirks at them, you know that he’s just doing it for show, he didn’t actually end up doing anything at all even if you wished hard that he would.

but then you feel eyes on you, speculating, judging, confused eyes all over you because who are you and why did kim taehyung pull you under a hoodie when he usually just kisses people in front of everyone? you hate the attention, you hate the amusement at your flushed state in them, and you can do nothing but revert your gaze to the floor.

“stop making her uncomfortable and spin the bottle already” an annoyed voice emerges from the crowd and you snap your head to look at where it came from, to see a girl who glares at the people staring at you, they quickly look away at her words, reverting their attention back to the game, and when she catches your gaze, you send her a grateful look and she smiles back at you.

and you feel better.

then you’re reminded of the man beside you, who covers your legs once again with his hoodie and you feel your face heating up all over as you replay the events that happened a few minutes ago.

that was so intimate.

you pull at the hoodie resting on your lap, trying not to think of how much more gorgeous taehyung looked up close, losing all interest in the game still being played around you, you also feel slightly insulted that taehyung would do all that but not kiss you, you know that he wouldn’t kiss you but it was embarrassing to be so close and not do anything at all.

did you repel him that much?

“let’s get you another drink” taehyung mutters, getting up from his sitting position and dusting his jeans off.

“game’s not over” you point to the still spinning bottle in the middle and he shrugs.

“i don’t wanna play it anymore” you don’t either, so you leave the circle as well, more people replacing your seats as quick as lightning. taehyung hands you a drink once you get into the kitchen and no words are exchanged between you two as you stand against the counter, sipping your drink and him on the other end of the counter, not even drinking anything, just looking into empty space.

the silence is suffocating, it’s new for the two of you, especially new to you because taehyung never seems to shut up but he isn’t uttering a word.

“is that kim taehyung?” comes a loud, dare you say annoying voice with a chuckle from the entry of the kitchen, taehyung quickly stands upright and gives a bright smile.

“hey man, it’s been a while” they give each other a side hug as the guy lazily smiles at taehyung.

“last i saw you, was at the studio with min yoongi and someone else” the guy starts to think and taehyung visibly tenses up at the mention of a studio and your interest is peaked, because taehyung has never mentioned a studio to you.

“it was probably namjoon hyung” taehyung answers the guy and he nods in recognition.

“you guys are still doing that music shit? i thought you would give up after a week, my man” your mouth drops open at the rude tone of the guy, he’s clearly patronizing taehyung who freezes in his spot, his usual smile immediately dropping from his face and you are the only one in the room who notices how tight his fists are by his arms.

it’s also the first time you’ve seen taehyung without his usual grin. you don’t like it; you don’t like this guy either.

taehyung isn’t a confrontational person nor is he someone who gets into a fight easily, for as long as you have known him, before and after tutoring him, one thing you know for sure is that taehyung avoids fights, not because he will lose but because he would much rather just enjoy his time instead of wasting it on people who don’t deserve it.

“i mean, come on, what do you guys even know about music to do it? just finish your degree like the rest of us and get a proper job, music won’t keep you alive in the real world” the guy says it like he’s doing taehyung a favor, like his advice would save taehyung’s life and taehyung just stands stiff, clearly upset.

“taehyung, can we leave?” you interrupt the conversation and both heads turn to look at you, you don’t know anything about taehyung and his music but you don’t want him to deal with this guy anymore either. taehyung immediately nods at you, looking relieved.

“now, who is she?” the guys lifts his eyebrow at you with a smirk, raking his eyes over you shamelessly.

“you don’t need to know, you fucking prick” you dead pan at him, even surprising yourself with your harsh tone and taehyung snorts at the guys annoyed face, walking to you and guiding you out of there with a hand on your lower back. you snapped because not only has this night been overwhelming, you also just can’t stand people as ridiculous as him, how dare he say anything about taehyung at all.

taehyung would be the biggest liar if he said that he didn’t find that hot, he knows how much you would prefer being away from people and situations like that and he almost expected you to just stand and watch but the second you talked back to the guy for him, taehyung has had this overwhelming sense of ego take over him because you wouldn’t do that for anyone but you did it for him.

and as he keeps looking at you, taehyung realizes there’s a lot that you do for him, that you don’t do for anyone else, you snuck out of a class for him, he knows that rules are something you stick to but you let them go for him, you went to lunch with a practical stranger for him, something you would never do with another classmate, you came to this party for him and if it weren’t for how nervous you looked under that hoodie, taehyung would have kissed you, there’s nothing else he’s wanted to do more.

thinking about all of this means only one thing to him, taehyung likes you, more than a friend ever will, he doesn’t think he’s ever seen you as just a friend, not when your head lulled back and forth and fell on his shoulders the day he carried you to your apartment, taehyung doesn’t worry about a lot but he was worried about how sick you were and when he contemplated kissing you every single time you met up to study, taehyung knows he’s been a goner for you.

taehyung likes you, he wants to be with you and not have boundaries, he wants to see you let loose fully, he wants you to kiss him whenever you want to and his hand around your waist tightens at his realization.

after becoming aware of the hand on you which carefully weaves you through the crowd, you quickly move away from his touch, walking through the crowds by yourself, and taehyung follows you with an evident frown on his face.

he just thought you two are alright but he’s proven wrong with the distance that gets further between you two and he can’t help the disappointment flooding his chest. and again, guilt, the guilt that has stayed with him since you left him hanging at the door, why the guilt though? he doesn’t know.

you get into his car with a sigh, already relieved that this night will be over soon and you can just ignore everything from tomorrow and taehyung doesn’t drive away, sits there with his hands on his lap and a grim expression. you look at him for a few minutes, you have a million questions about what that guy said, about whether it was true that taehyung does music but you bitterly remember your place in his life, a tutor, which is why you don’t end up asking anything.

“taehyung, we need to go” you remind him and he nods slowly, lifting his head to grip the steering wheel tightly and sighs once again, letting it go.

“do you have to go home?” he turns to you with anxiousness on his face that you don’t recognize, he almost looks desperate? lost even, if you had to describe.

“where else will we go?”

“can i take you somewhere?”

“it’s my apartment, i have to show you something, i’ll drop you as soon as we’re done there, i promise” and when it looks like you’re going to refuse, taehyung immediately adds this part and you are even more confused.

if you’re just someone tutoring him, why does he want you to come to his apartment?

“fine” you mutter and fall back on the seat, annoyed at yourself for not being able to say no to him even now and shut your eyes before you think too much about it.

-

“come in” taehyung moves out of the way and you walk into his apartment, it was just big enough for one person, and covered in beige and shades of autumnal colors that give it a warm feel.

“your home is pretty” the compliment leaves your lips before you can stop it and taehyung gives you a softer smile than the one he usually has.

“thank you”

upon further walking in, you see a messy living room with papers thrown around, a desk covered in similar papers and a computer with a music system sitting right in front of it.

bingo.

the obnoxious guy at the party definitely wasn’t lying about the music part.

when you turn around to see taehyung, he looks so much smaller than he normally does, he looks nervous, he’s fidgeting and playing with his fingers and it takes you completely off guard. you’ve never seen him like this.

“what did you want to show me?” you ask, not going any further into the apartment and standing with your arms crossed. he doesn’t utter a word as he walks over to you, pulls your folded arms apart and holds your hand which confuses you and fills you with warmth at the same time.

you can only stare at your intertwined hands as he pulls you forward.

what is happening?

you are only brought back to reality when he places you on the chair in front of the computer and you look back at him with a frown.

“it’s true, what the guy at the party said, i do make music and i didn’t want you to think that i don’t plan on telling you” he mutters from behind you with fiddling fingers and it feels satisfying that you are not the nervous one this time.

so, taehyung does do music and you are impressed, very impressed because you feel like it’s a very emotionally taxing process and takes a lot of bravery to actually spill your feelings into ink, you could never do it which is why it’s a hundred times more admirable to you.

“so, i wanted to play you one of my songs?” he says it in a question and you stay quiet, both grateful that he’s showing you his work and even more confused because again, he called you his tutor not even two hours ago, you don’t understand why he’s showing you all this.

“why are you showing me?” the question tumbles out of your mouth in a disappointed sigh.

“because i trust you” he answers simply, ignoring your widened eyes and looking through his computer, all while leaned over your shoulder, and no matter how many times this has happened, his body brushing against yours leaves you breathless.

he purses his lips as he presses play and you instinctively lean towards the computer as a soft song starts thrumming through the room.

“on my pillow can't get me tired sharing my fragile truth that i still hope the door is open

'cause the window opened one time with you and me now my forever's falling down wondering if you'd want me now?

how could i know? one day i’d wake up feeling more but I had already reached the shore guess we were ships in the night night, night

we were ships in the night night, night.”

your mouth stays agape as you listen to taehyung’s voice, which is steady and deep and pushes all the way to your heart, and the song just feels so warm, like the beautiful end to a bright summer, there’s sadness but desperation more clearly written in the lyrics and you can’t believe that you’re sitting in front of the man who’s singing it.

“did you write this?” you ask quietly as the song continues to play and you see a nod from the corner of your eye and your admiration for taehyung grows ten-fold, as you listen to his voice in complete awe, if his voice is deep usually, it’s a lot deeper and more soulful when he’s singing. and whoever he’s singing this song for, you are jealous of them, you don’t know them but you’re jealous of them.

“do you like it?” he pauses the player before another song starts and how do you tell him that you might just be in love with him and everything about him?

“it was beautiful” you compliment, albeit a little bitter that it isn’t about you and taehyung looks a mixture of pleased and relieved at your words.

“who is it for?” you can’t help but ask him as you stay seated.

“no one, it’s just a story i’ve had on my mind” you sense only honesty in his words and it further impresses you that he can weave a story and put life and love into it.

“of two people in love?”

“of two people falling in love.” he corrects you and it dawns on you that a story of two people already in love would be a lot different than two people discovering and falling slowly but surely.

“did you have fun making the story?” now that you know about his music, you are only curious to know more about it and taehyung is more than happy to indulge you.

“it’s…different, making a story of two people, no one that you know, but giving them emotions, giving their emotions a journey and putting it into words in a proper way, it’s hard but i enjoy nothing else more.” you only listen to how taehyung describes songwriting because you still are in awe at how much passion he holds when he’s talking about music.

one out of many things that you loved about taehyung was that you could never just expect something to happen with him, he really played his own drum and did whatever he wanted to do, consequences are an afterthought to him, and it’s refreshing, it’s also so rare which is why you truly think he’s one of the most precious kind of people. like who would have known that the party would end this way?

“that’s very cool of you” you smile at him and he grins back, moving away from you to take his stuffy jacket off and you already miss being encompassed in his warmth. you get up from your seat, thinking that you will have to leave soon now that you have heard the song.

“should we go now?” you ask him, not actually wanting to leave but knowing you can’t stay either.

“there’s one thing left to do” he says with pursed lips, coming back to where you’re stood and you frown at him.

“what is it?” you question as he starts walking to you with determination in every step, taehyung doesn’t want to lose his courage before he reaches you.

“what?” you ask again, a little breathlessly this time, your breath getting uneven and the butterflies singing in every end of your nerves when he stands right in front of you, looking down on you while biting his lip slightly.

and his hand comes up to take your glasses off, you feel completely bare as he carelessly throws them to the side and then curls his fingers around your cheek. while smiling, he doesn’t give you an answer, just closes the distance between you two with a single, large step and pulls you to him with his hand firm on your waist.

“i hope you don’t mind” is his cheeky comment as he caresses your cheek once before he does what he couldn’t do at the party.

everything falls into place perfectly to you; your hands grip his thin t-shirt to stabilize yourself and his hands grab onto your skin like he will go insane if he doesn’t feel you. you are hot all over, your body shaking a little with the overflowing love and affection you throw into each pull of his lips. you gasp for breath once he lets you go a little, gazing into your eyes and you return a dazed look of your own, but you aren’t given a break when he pulls you back in again, chasing after you like you will run away if he lets you go for too long.

but taehyung doesn’t have to worry, you aren’t going anywhere.

and frankly, you don’t mind this at all.

-

the rest of the night is just taehyung playing you more songs and a lot of kissing, neither of you confessing but kissing each other like your life depended on it and if taehyung doesn’t like you the way you do, you don’t think you will ever be able to move on from his addicting scent and touch.

you toss and turn on taehyung’s bed, you ended up staying after he insisted in between kisses and you were too weak and lost in the moment to refuse, he ended up sleeping on the couch and that gave you plenty of time to think about last night. you got up way too early and after freshening up, you just couldn’t face him, you didn’t know how to so you stayed in his room.

what did it even mean to him?

was it just one of those kisses you blame on too much alcohol?

you groan and stuff your face into a pillow as you resist the urge to scream, if you were confused before, you simply don’t have a clue anymore, the line between friendship and relationship between you and him was so blurred, you don’t even know if it existed anymore.

and if he was going to kiss you, why make you feel so insignificant at the beginning?

“you really shouldn’t think so much this early into the day” you jump when you hear taehyung’s amused voice at the door, he looks just as gorgeous as always even in the morning.

“i blame you for it” you retort as you sit up, he falls on his bed while stretching, letting out a loud yawn and you smile at him, you like waking up to him.

“i told you i will take the couch” you tell him with slight guilt as he continues to stretch his sore body.

“that’s fine, next time we’ll just sleep together” he looks up at you with a smirk and you turn stark red at the suggestive tone, reaching for the pillow behind you and throwing it on his face, letting out a loud laugh when he lets out a yelp of pain.

“speaking of that” you purse your lips as he stops stretching and looks at you with his usual bright smile which flutters your heart just like the first time.

“what are we?” you ask him, gesturing between you two, the question lays heavily in the air as neither of you say a word after you ask that.

“what do you want us to be?” he questions back, scooting closer to you and finally settling right beside you. when you don’t answer him, he pulls you back into him, letting you rest your head on his shoulder and you curl into him, not brave enough to say it first.

“i like you, a lot, and i’ve never thought of you as a friend, you have always been something more to me and i like you too much to let this go at one night, i can’t let you go after last night” taehyung confesses, his tone is soft as he plays with your fingers in his hand, sighing at the end.

“personally, i would love to have you as my girlfriend but it’s up to you, y/n, whatever you want, i’ll give to you” the sincerity in his voice as he talks, makes you teary-eyed as you shove your face into his chest, and at your shyness, he is as amused as ever.

“you really need to tell me something before i go crazy over here, love” he says with a low chuckle, you have always hated nicknames but being called ‘love’ by taehyung has you floating on the sky with hearts for eyes and you feel bad for keeping him hanging. you can never say no to him anyway.

“i also would love to have you as my boyfriend” is your mumble on his chest and he somehow hears it, letting out a relieved sigh before pulling you even closer, legs twisting around yours as he caresses your hair slowly.

“do you still have to tutor me though?”

“you got one A, don’t get too brave.”

requests are open!

masterlist

if you have ideas of any kind at all, for all members, please send them to me in messages or asks.

rules:

i do not write hardcore smut, only suggestive tones.

i do not write about violence or topics that could be too triggering, i can write about sensitive topics with appropriate warnings.

i do not support fetishization or infantilization.

but other than this, i write just about anything with your own input and i will try my best to put what you want in the story.

thank you so much in advance if you send in your ideas, i hope i can write it however you want <3

Like little bon bons of smut, I love it .

Bestie, it's been a while and I have some important questions for you 😏

Holiday Edition

Who rents a cabin in the mountains and does you on the floor in front of the lit fireplace? 🔥

Who makes their home-made mulled wine way too strong and has sloppy drunk sex with you? 🍷

Who makes holiday cookies with you but uses the icing for something else? 🍪

Who turns hanging lights into an impromptu boudoir photoshoot because "the lights look so beautiful on your skin, let me try something really quick" 🎄

-🍹

*GASP* A HOLIDAY 🍹THOTANON POST?! You are a true gift --- one that the boys can’t wait to unwrap...

Q: Who rents a cabin in the mountains and does you on the floor in front of the lit fireplace? 🔥

A: Jimin and Tae

(WOW OK WOWWWWW @mochilatae YOU SEE THIS?? YOU SEE HOW YOU MANIFEST THINGS?)

Jimin and Tae can barely keep it together once the three of you burst into the cabin that they booked MONTHS ago, agreeing to split the cost if they can split your time, lips on lips, hands in hands and in hair and grabbing elsewhere, hushed and hurried protests from one that the other is being too selfish with you. After a couple of hours of "unpacking your luggage", flitting back and forth between their rooms upstairs, you finally go downstairs, and the three of you share dinner. And if you can share dinner, you can definitely share dessert. Soon enough, clothes border the bear skin rug. Jimin's lips find that spot on your neck to be just as sweet. Tae's hands find their homes on your hips, always going in for seconds, and thirds. As the night goes on, you're somehow insatiable, and yet completely full -- Jimin's length feeding you, Tae's filling you up, and you only wanting more, more, more.

Q: Who makes their home-made mulled wine way too strong and has sloppy drunk sex with you? 🍷

A: Yoongi

Yoongi is nothing if not meticulous. And yet, here you are, face down, ass up, in his bed, the two of you giggling and drooling between hisses and lip bites. What was he going to say? Oh, right, lean over that way and--- yessss, just like that, snap back and meet him halfway. Both your brains are so foggy, and yet, you understand each other, half-mumbled sentences hidden in hungry kisses and licks and sucks and slurps. You understand each other like you do when you're completely sober, which you totally were when you slipped more than just a little brandy into the mix when Yoongi wasn't looking. "What did you do?" Yoongi moans through grit teeth, as his cock pries the last of your deepest walls just apart enough for him to bestow upon you his perfect crown. "This what you wanted, huh?" You giggle and squeeze as he slaps and claws at your ass. "Yes!" you cry out, both of you erupting with pleasure. It's everything you want, the only thing you want, getting drunk off of him.

Q: Who makes holiday cookies with you but uses the icing for something else? 🍪

A: Jin, Hobi

Jin usually portions everything out carefully, so you're surprised when you enter the kitchen to find way too much icing for the amount of cookies you're going to make. He tells you it's for later. Your mind reels. What could it possibly be for, you wonder, as his hands rest on top of yours to guide you on how to handle the dough, as his seesaw-ing voice tells you, "Size matters, sweetie" when you go to portion the dough out, and his chest pressed against your back as you both slide the tray inside the oven. When you turn around, Jin is holding out an icing-covered finger next to your lips. "We've got some time to kill. Ready to find out?" he asks, with a grin. You suck the icing off with a pleasant pop, after which he grabs the icing bag and pulls you to his room.

Hobi hates messes. But he loved tossing the flour, and the chocolate chips, and the icing at you as you raced around the kitchen. The icing in particular is everywhere, in your hair, in your clothes, on your skin. You don't even remember how the food fight started, but the icing in particular is starting to drive you crazy. "Truce," you whine. Yes, Hobi hates messes. But that also means that he's really, really good at cleaning them up. He plucks dried icing from your hair. He licks the icing from your neck. And, as the decidedly ugly but most likely still delicious cookies bake in the oven, he washes your body under his rain shower head, taking extra time to make sure you're squeaky clean --- that is, except for the things you're about to do...

Q: Who turns hanging lights into an impromptu boudoir photoshoot because "the lights look so beautiful on your skin, let me try something really quick" 🎄

A: Jungkook, Namjoon

"Let me try something really quick," Jungkook tells you, as he lets his film camera hang around his neck. He walks towards you to adjust one stretch of the string lights hanging on the tree. You smile warmly at him as he analyzes the scene, working hard to make sure that he captures your silhouette perfectly, your naked curves smooth and clear against the red, green, and gold bokeh dots that he hopes will turn out exactly as intended. "Now," he says, walking back to his spot a couple of feet away, "turn over your shoulder for me?" You do, and you slip him a seductive smile. "Mmm," Jungkook says, snapping picture after picture. His camera falls, hanging around his neck. "Let me try something else..." He walks up to you, and instead of his hands adjusting those lights again, they run down your sides, tickling you and and pulling you back to him, your ass meeting his bulge. "Jungkook," you say playfully, as his forearms rest against your hips, hands finding their way to your mound, "we're SUPPOSED to be decorating the tree." You can't help but shiver and relent when Jungkook slips a finger between your lips, takes your other hand and places it against his hardening cock. He mumbles in your ear, "Let me try decorating you instead."

"The lights look so beautiful on your skin," Namjoon cooes, as he snaps a picture. His eyes follow the string of lights spiraling around your naked body, criss-crossing in the space between your breasts, the ends twisting around your wrists above your head. "God..." He can't get enough of you tied up and lying on his silk sheets like that. When you start to arch, knees bent, back curved, only your ass and the crown of your head the only things still touching the sheets, he takes bursts of pictures, not wanting to miss a moment. "Fuck." You turn to him and push your lips out, eyes heavy-lidded. "Fuck. OK. That's it." You giggle as Namjoon tosses his phone onto his nightstand (he completely misses), choosing to occupy his fingers with the task of tracing the string of lights, the pads of his fingers grazing your skin, your jaw, your throat, your nipples, your still-tied wrists. But he doesn't free you. "I thought we were gonna..." you trail off. "Oh, we are," Namjoon says, starting to undress. "But... those lights... they just look so beautiful on your skin."

words of affirmation [jungkook x reader]

drabble count: 4

if you want to be tagged for future works masterlist of all works previous | next drabble

taglist: @noooodlllleeee @hadhafang

summary: You always thought you weren't enough, insecurity getting the best of you. Yet, all Jungkook wants to do is leave you in his embrace-so that it's you and him against the world.

pairing: jungkook x reader

chapter tags/warnings: angst, self-depricating thoughts, fluff

a/n: hello hello! welcome to my second jungkook drabble, though this is a little shorter than others. i love writing drabbles based on prompts, so if you want one, please don't hesitate to ask/submit on my page. thanks so much for reading! you can also buy me a ko-fi <3

Jungkook despises families. Correction: yours. Not his. No, his family is nice and pleasant, the atmosphere always filled with laughter and teasing. It’s yours he hated.

Your parents barely even sees you as a human being—more like a bank account—pouring their love onto your brother instead of you. The constant criticism your mother spat through the phone, loud enough that even he overheard it on several occasion, are words that you shouldn’t say to anyone, much less you. Every time he sees your mother calling, he wants to rip the phone away from you, and tuck you in his embrace. But he restrains himself. Barely. 

Like now. 

“Why don’t you give money to your brother? Do you not even care for him?” Your mother says, and he balls his hands into fists, chin on your shoulder as he eavesdrops. 

“I give money to you for you to give it to him,” you say quietly. “And frankly, it’s money I earned.”

“Your brother wants—”

“I’m not his mother. I’ve always asked for something, and you loved telling me no. Why can’t it be the same for him?”

Both of you know the answer: because he’s a boy. Jungkook’s heart aches for you when you wince at the string of curses your mother yells at you, along with the You’re so ungrateful, and the Why did I even raise you if you’re going to be this way. He also knows that in a few seconds, your mother will amend it with a I’m just worried about you, and you’ll reluctantly give her your money, holding back your tears. 

He doesn’t need to visit the family to see the dynamic. It’s evident in the way that every time he tries to buy you something or give you a gift, you shake your head and soon—reluctantly—accept it. Sometimes, you’d stare at a dress or a desktop, scrolling through and waiting for the prices to go down. 

Your mother didn’t give you anything. And you learned not to ask, thinking it would overstep people’s boundaries. 

The more she talks, the more your face falls, and he can’t take it anymore. Without hesitance, he presses the red button that’ll end the call and buries his face in the crook of your neck, pulling you forward so that you’re sitting on his lap. 

“She's going to give you hell for that,” you whisper.

“Don’t care. I have no intentions of meeting her, anyways.” He brushes a hair from your eyes. “I don’t want to meet someone who treats you like crap—when you’re the furthest thing away from it.”

It’s also clear that you’re not used to compliments, because you press your lips together and your eyes well with tears. 

“Oh, baby,” he croons, and you release a sob, slapping your hand over your mouth. The tears betray the composure you’re struggling to maintain, streaming down your cheeks. Jungkook places his mouth on your forehead. It’s like someone’s choking him, making him unable to breathe. The hurt you experience every time a member of your family calls drives him insane, knowing that he’s helpless and can’t fix the issue. 

Fuck. Can’t they see that you’re struggling to even love yourself? They should be praising you, except they’re doing the exact opposite. 

“I love you,” he whispers. “You’re my favorite person in the world, you know that?”

“You don’t need to say that, Jungkook,” you choke out. “I’m okay.”

“No, you’re not.” The words are harsh. “And you shouldn’t be, with how they’re treating you. But you have to know that you’re better than that—than them. You deserve all the love I have in the world. You’re smart. You’re worth it. You’re mine. I love waking up and knowing that I’m yours, knowing that I get to spend quality time with you—”

And he falters, watching the disbelief on your face. Jungkook’s lips grazes yours.

“Everything about you is perfect, baby. Don’t ever doubt yourself.”

“I wish—” You swallow. “I wish I knew you earlier.”

In high school, you’re talking about.  He wishes he did, too. Going back in time and giving you confidence and loving you before any assholes did would be the perfect fix. Though neither of you can turn back time, he murmurs his agreement.

“I love you. Now and forever.”

“Forever,” you echo, a small smile on your lips. The tears are still falling, and he understands that you’re overwhelmed. 

And as you snuggle with him, he’s honored that you can be this comfortable with him to show your vulnerable side. Grateful that he’s the one taking care of you, instead of someone else. Blessed, to call you his. 

A Collection of Hate (Love) Letters [Jeon Jungkook]

drabble count: 6

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buy me a coffee or become a member on my ko-fi page! 💞

do I have a reason why I'm doing this? not particularly.

am I plotting this? pfft, no. I can't even give you a summary at this point, lmaoooo. how many will there be? that remains to be seen haha, but this is honestly a new writing style I want to try out. come along for the ride!

next letter

Dear

Jungkook ah

Jeon Jungkook.

I hate you.

Don’t come see me. Ever. Or I’ll throw salt at you and a bucket of cold water—the bucket included. 

(Ignore the pen scribbles, they're not meant to be terms of endearment for you).

tag list: @theblueslytherin @tatyhend @tinyoonsblog @vsmith0099 @midnightsora @cupcakesxdomjoon @likeshatteredrainbowglass @scuzmunkie @kookiwu @xjiminsthighsx @dreadity @lovelytaes-blog @noooodlllleeee

the first letter

real quick note - this is a highschool/college au, so Jungkook will be around that age! thanks for reading xx

will i fix the format later? yes. does it matter right now? no. those who know will know (idk even know so)

literally this will be so scattered lmao

previous letter | next letter

tag list | masterlist | kofi

[7 months ago] - christmas

You're still not answering my last... what, trillion letters?

I slept on a chair. You told me not to sleep on couches because it's bad for my back. But guess what, I one-downed it, didn't I?

I see you rolling your eyes.

Ugh. That's not even a word. Sorry my Korean sucks-it's deteriorating the more I'm around Hyeri.

Remember when you held my hand?

Nevermind. That's irrelevant.

It just... it sucks having the role of the "mood lifter." Am I supposed to smile all the time?

Do the corner of your eyes still crinkle when you smile?

Sorry, context, yeah.

Halabuji's in the hospital. They say he has cancer. I'm in the corner typing this out so I can write it later, because the first person I thought of is you. I'm rambling. Nothing I say makes sense.

Nobody's looking for me because I'm not the favorite.

Halabuji's the centripetal force in our family.

If you can't tell, I'm getting desperate.

Fuck. Now I'm crying again.

(Ignore most of what I'm saying, I didn't write it, I promise. Not drunk though. Underage drinking. Hahahahah).

(I'll stop.)

tag list: @theblueslytherin @tatyhend @tinyoonsblog @vsmith0099 @midnightsora @cupcakesxdomjoon @likeshatteredrainbowglass @scuzmunkie @kookiwu @xjiminsthighsx @dreadity @lovelytaes-blog @noooodlllleeee @ggukkieland

🌻 share a favorite line of dialogue out of context

thank you for the ask! sorry it's late haha xx

[more like favorite scene, but hope you don't mind]

“I have to go to practice,” he murmurs.

“Good. Oh, but before you go.” Before he can realize I uncap the water bottle and throw it at him, and he fumbles to catch it. The end result is beautiful. The water makes an arch and hits him directly in the face and his dyed, blue hair, him sputtering in conclusion. It smacks his nose, too, with a satisfying crack, and I can't help but snicker.

“To top it off,” I add, taking a pinch of salt from the jar, holding my wrists just right, and aiming it at him. Though he’ll think otherwise, I think I found my calling. Getting rid of demonic beings. 

“What the fuck?” He says. from: storyteller saturday (even though it's monday)

By far the best Namjoon smut I have yet read

Hold the Door | KNJ

Pairings: Namjoon x Reader

Rating: 18+ / Mature / Explicit

Synopsis: Will you ever have a normal elevator ride with Namjoon?

Word Count: 8.3k | read on ao3

Genres, Content Warnings, & Themes: Enemies to lovers, neighbors, angst, arguing / fighting, weed, dirty talk, smut (unprotected sex, oral sex, penetrative sex, semi-public sex)

Author’s Note: Written for this “anon” 😉, who has an incredible recurring dream about Namjoon! (Wish we were all just as lucky!) Thanks for your patience, and I hope you enjoy, dear friend!

Permanent Taglist: @purpleheartsfortae @btseditsworld @greezenini @missbickerbocker @dearbambideer @helenazbmrskai @morti13 @skyys-universe @somewhereofftheglobe @imaginativedreams @dreamamubarak @m-yg93 @elyte @awinkies​

Saturday 4:42 PM

“Great, I was wondering whether this day would get any better.”

The sideways, questioning, but dazed glance that your best friend gives you is as flat as the tone with which your words fall to the, as-of-yet, unreplaced carpet in your apartment building’s lobby. Her lips are obscured by the tall, heavy stack of boxes contained in a brown bag, safely clutched and pinned to her body. And her face is mostly hidden by the massive bunch of pink and yellow balloons that are tied around her shoulder to keep them from floating away. But you know that she’s shooting you a pout of confusion.

You couldn’t lift your arms to press the elevator call button the first time, given that you’re weighed down by all the shopping bags. So you jut your elbow out again to gesture backwards and focus her attention on the nightmare who has just walked into your building.

To the unwitting soul, the navy, knit beanie and matching navy t-shirt and sweatpants shuffling toward you might have been pleasant to look at. Thrilling, even, judging by the look in your best friend’s eye, squinting and appraising, like a jeweller’s eye behind a glass. 

She doesn’t really know what she’s looking at.

“The answer, by the way, is a resounding no,” you say quickly, hoping to head off further questioning.

“But he’s hot,” she raves, the brown paper crinkling at her breath.

The elevator’s friendly ding! can’t come soon enough, and when it does, you quickly step into the back corner.

“Hold the door!” the navy-clad man calls from the entryway. His voice booms throughout the lobby. Even your doorman turns to peek inside.

Your best friend — or, now, ex-best friend — plants herself between the elevator doors. “That giant, steamy slice of beefcake is a no?” she asks, turning to face you.

“You heard me!” you repeat.

You step forward, kicking at her feet to move her out of the way. She kicks back, at a slight advantage with her heels. But then a new set of toes come into view. Toes outlined by navy plastic. 

“Namjoon,” you grumble as politely as you can, as you look up from his toes and into his face.

Keep reading

can someone recommend me some bts ot7 series, drabbles, reactions, authors, etc ??? please i’m begginggg :(

I’m Fine, I Swear.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Summary: You vent to your fiancé about how your girls never want to have a night alone without wanting their man to tag along.

A/N: I wrote this in the heat of the moment so this is bad lmao but thank you if you read this anyway! Also, this is my first time writing on tumblr so please excuse the bad layout haha. One last thing, credit to the original owner of the gif!

7:08pm

What abt our man?

7:10pm

What abt our man? Haha

7:10pm

Well I don’t want to leave them alone.

7:15pm

Oh come on, they can have their own guys night! I’ve missed hanging out with you girls without men involved. Do you guys not miss that either?

7:16pm

Yeah, but idk y/n.

You sighed loudly, turning off your phone not bothering replying back. You were pretty upset with your friends. You’ve missed them so much, just them, no men involved, but of course they always want their man around. I mean, yeah, you’d like your man to join in the fun too, but it’s been so long since a girls night out only. Why couldn’t they see that?

“Are you okay, jagi?” Jungkook asked as he entered your shared bedroom, seeing the state you were in.

“I’m fine, I swear,” You replied back with a hint of annoyance in your voice.

Your back was facing him so you didn’t see the frown stretched across his face as he walked towards you.

“You can talk to me, you know? What’s bothering you?” He asked gently, sitting down and then wrapping his arms around you.

You leaned into his touch instantly, “My friends never want to hang out anymore, or at least just us. They always want to bring their man along. I mean, I don’t mind you or the other guys coming along, but I just miss girls time, you know?” You vented.

“I’m sorry about that, jagi. Talk to them about it. Tell them how you feel, and if they’re willing to listen to you and change, then that’s good, but if not, then I think it’s time for you to find some new friends,” Jungkook comforted.

You hummed, “I’ll try,” turning around to face him with a small smile, “Thank you for always listening to me, kook. I love you,” you finished with a small kiss to his lips.

“I’ll always be here to listen to you. I love you too,” he reminded.

Times like these are where you are most thankful for your loving fiancé. He just always had the right words to remind you that everything will be okay.

Hii I see that you're taking requests? Can you write something like your first kiss together? Not like your first kiss or anything, just the first time he kisses you. You can make it super fluffy and cute, any of the boys is fine :))

First Kiss

Pairing: Jung Hoseok x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Summary: Your first kiss with your long term crush.

A/N: HI! I am SO sorry that I got to this so late. I’ve been so nervous to start writing but since I posted my first drabble a couple of hours ago, a wave of confidence just rushed into me 😭 anyways, I hope you like this! I’m not good at all so bare with me lol. Also, credit to the original owner of the gif!

You’ve been shuffling around your room for the past 10 minutes trying to find your phone.

“Ugh, where is that damn phone!” You whisper-yelled under your breath, throwing the millions of pillows from your now-not-so made bed onto the floor.

“Aha! There it is,” Cheering, you checked the time quickly, seeing that you still had about 8 minutes left before Hoseok was going to pick you up.

“Omg, Y/N, Jung Hoseok is checking you out right now,” Y/F gasped, looking right past you.

“What? No he isn’t!” you quickly denied, although your back was facing him.

“No, really! And look, he’s coming over too!” She rambled on.

“Y/F, I swear if you’re ly-,”

“Hello, Y/N,” Hoseok beamed.

You turned around with a shy smile tugging at your lips, “Hoseok, hi,”

“Uh, Y/F, can we have a minute to talk in private, please?” He asked nicely.

“Sure,” Y/F winked at you before leaving, therefore blush rising onto your cheeks.

“What did y-,”

“Do you want to go on a date with me?” Hoseok spit out quickly.

Your eyes went wide, did he really just ask you that? “I’m sorry, what?”

“Do you um- want to go on a date with me,” he asked once again, awkwardly scratching the back of his head due to your response.

“Wait, really?” You were shocked.

“Yes, really,” Hoseok chuckled.

“Okay, then yes,” you giggled, now adverting your gaze down to the floor.

“I’ll pick you up by eight. See you until then,” and with that he walked away with a smile on his face.

Butterflies erupted in your stomach thinking back to that moment. Jung Hoseok, your long term crush, was going to take you out on a date. It felt like a fever dream and you needed someone to pinch you just so you know if this is real or not.

8:01pm

Hey, I’m here :)

You smoothed out your outfit before walking down the stairs and then out of your house where you spot him leaning against his car, waiting for you.

“Hi, you look nice,” Hoseok complimented.

“Thank you,” You blushed, “You too,”

“So, where are we going?” You asked as you guys have been driving for quite some time now.

“A very special place of mine,” he replied.

You nodded, not wanting to get into depth of it.

“Where are we?” You questioned once again, getting out of the car and starting to walk with him. You were quite scared since you two were in the mountains and it was dark out. What if he was going to kill you?!

“Tada,”

You gasped at the scenery in front of you. The busy lights and city below you as you stood on the high mountain. “This is beautiful,” you breathed out.

“It is. This is, well, a very special place of mine, and I wanted to show it to you,” A shy smile plastered on Hoseok’s face.

“Oh my gosh. This is such a huge honor, Hoseok. Thank you—for showing me this,” you sincerely said. There you go again, butterflies erupting in your stomach as you thought about how special this was.

You two have been sitting quietly for some time now, just staring out to the city below and all of the busy lights. You guys didn’t need to talk to know that you were enjoying each other’s presence, the comfortable silence said it all to you both.

“I like you, Y/N,” Hoseok whispered so quietly you almost couldn’t hear him.

“Hm?” You turned to look at him just to find out he was already looking at you. He has for some time now, but not in a creepy way of course, just admiring you and how beautiful you are in every way possible.

“I like you a lot, so much I don’t know what to do with myself anymore,” he continued to whisper quietly, his eyes flickering between your eyes and lips.

You noticed that he was leaning in, and that was when you found yourself leaning in as well.

You both leaned in slowly until your lips touch. It was like his lips were made for yours. They were so soft and plump that you just wanted to kiss it all day.

“I like you too, by the way,” you blushed after pulling away from your mini make-out session.

“That makes you my girlfriend then, right?” Hoseok teased, scooting closer to you.

“If only that makes you my boyfriend,” you teased back before his lips were on yours again in no time.

Everything about him was so perfect. Especially his lips. They felt like heaven on yours.

Happy Birthday, My Love.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Summary: You didn’t forget his birthday… did you?

A/N: Happiest birthday to one of my favorite chapter. I love you so much, koo. Have the best day today!

The morning sun shines through the sheer curtains as jungkook and you lay intertwined in bed. With you still sleeping, jungkook is wide awake, focused on your calm breathing and running his hands through your silky hair.

He looks down at you slightly, smiling to himself as today was his birthday and he wondered what you had planned for the day, for the two of you.

“Good morning, jagi,” Jungkook hums, seeing you try to open your eyes while letting out a small yawn.

“Morning, Koo,” You respond back sleepily, trying to snuggle deeper into his chest, “How long have you been awake?”

“A good while now,” He exclaimed, waiting for you to greet him with a happy birthday and a birthday kiss, maybe even a little more for this morning.

Jungkook didn’t know that you were planning to pretend that you forgot his birthday, while actually you had a whole birthday dinner planned for him along with the boys. This was evil, you gotta admit, but you were getting back at him because of the last time he had pranked you.

“I have so many things to do today. I don’t want to get out of bed,” You mumbled into his chest, closing your eyes again.

“Yeah? With me?” You could hear the hint of excitement in his voice, causing your heart to squeeze a little.

“No? Did we have something planned today? I forgot to tell you, but my friends asked to hang out today so I’m possibly gonna be out shopping the whole day,” You looked up at him, seeing him processing what you just said before a small frown and sad eyes popped up on his face.

“Oh. I thought- well- since today is- you know,” Jungkook mumbled quietly.

His face was so sad, you just wanted to come out and say just kidding and then spoil him with all of your love and kisses because it’s his birthday! Are you a bad girlfriend for this?!

“I know…?” You looked at him confused, yet you were screaming inside.

“Never mind!” He awkwardly laughed it off.

“I’ll see you later, bun,” With a short peck on his lips, you were out the door in no time. You had to get out of there before you broke the act.

“Bye, jagi-” A deep frown sat on jungkook’s lips as he sees you leaving quickly.

Guess you really did forget his birthday.

“Wait, wait. Tell me the story again!” Tae and Jimin laughed out, holding onto their stomachs.

After you left the house, you went to the boys dorm, telling them all about it, which leads to where we are now, Tae and Jimin laughing their ass off from the story you told them of how sad Jungkook looked.

“I feel bad, guys! I think we should call this off and just tell him what we really had planned,” You sighed.

“Oh come on, YN. It’s just a joke! He’ll laugh to this later on, trust me,” Jimin defended, Tae nodding along. They were so evil, you couldn’t believe it.

“Okay, fine,” You groaned, “so what the hell are we going to do until dinner?”

“Just hang out here, I guess,” Namjoon replied.

Jungkook waited 30 minutes. 30 minutes of looking at the door, hoping you would come back in saying this was all a joke, and that you actually DIDN’T miss his birthday. You were all just excited last week, telling him how your birthday was so soon, and now you suddenly forgot? This was insane.

With a huff, Jungkook stopped waiting and went into the kitchen to make himself some ramen. What was he gonna do until you come home? Hang out with the boys? He didn’t mind that, but he really wanted to spend today with his favorite girl.

Jungkook tried to make himself busy all day. To push away the fact that you were out at the mall, hanging out with your friends instead of your boyfriend, the BIRTHDAY boy.

He had many, many birthday messages and calls all day, but the one he was most looking forward to was yours. Maybe you would remember throughout the day and call or text him, wishing him a happy birthday and that you were on your way home. But nope, none of that have happened and it was already 7:00pm. He hated this feeling so much.

7:15pm

Hey, we’re going out for dinner. Dress nice

7:18pm

Not in the mood.

7:20pm

Come on! You’ve been sad all day. Plus, why didn’t you just tell YN it was your birthday?

7:25pm

Because I would have thought my OWN girlfriend remembered my birthday.

7:26pm

Just come, JK

7:30pm

Fine

“Surprise!” You yelled out along with the boys, a huge smile on your face.

“What- what is this?” Jungkook asked, confused written all over his face.

“A birthday dinner for you. Because today is your birthday,” You stated the obvious, giggling.

“I thought you forgot,” He frowned.

“Aw, baby! I would never forgot about your birthday. Today was just all a prank. I wanted to get back at you from the last prank you did on me,” You went over to him.

“You’re so mean! I’ll never forgive you,” Jungkook pouted, turning away from you.

“Jungkookieee,” You tried to get his attention, “Baby, I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad at me,” you frowned, wrapping your arms around him, then laying your head down on his back.

It was a minute before he put his hands on top of yours, turning around with a smile on his face.

“I’m not mad at you, jagi. Okay, maybe a little, but nevertheless, thank you for this,” Jungkook whispered into your ear as he hugged you tightly.

“Happy birthday, my love,” You smiled.

hi guys! i have a joon drabble coming out soon for his birthday (i’m so late ik i’ve been busied w school :() but be on the lookout! thank u for ur supported <3 !!

send in requests pls bc i wanna write but i don’t know what to write abt and who :(

Welcome to Namjoon's cafe, here is what we have to offer!

All stories are my original works. Do not copy or translate! Stories are available on wattpad & AO3 only!

Disclaimer: All stories have strong language & mature content :)

+ I write mature books anyone under the age of 18 should not read, my books are not for the weak of heart. I write messed up stories with messed up endings.

S e r i e s *

- Dear Namjoon (SMUT 🔞)|fluff & angst

↳ "I won't tell him" those four words made him smirk. "you won't tell him that one of his best friends has the hots for his little sister?" his breathe tickles your nose, you blush at his words making him sneer at your reaction, shaking your head.

"words" he pinches your thigh, as his hand makes it's way underneath your skirt. "No I won't tell him" you whine, you could feel yourself vulnerable with every touch, that you'd agree to anything he asked from you.

"good girl"

Main Chapters: Index

- D E E P (SMUT 🔞) | fluff, angst, best friends, fake dating, slow burn

↳ "but you guys are just fuck buddies" I speak up, making him smirk "it's called killing time, they know what they get into when they come to me"

"if you're just doing it to kill time, then do it with me"

Main chapters: index

- S N A T C H (SMUT 🔞) | gang au, angst

↳ Your father became the chief of police after he intercepted the ranks of the most influential gang. After six years of being in prison, Min yoongi escapes and has one goal in mind before he goes back into business. He's gonna get his revenge on the man who betrayed him and got him locked up. He was going to take the one thing that mattered to him the most; his daughter.

Index

read my drabbles :)

Work in progress...

✧ Dear Namjoon (namjoon)

series; not completed | angst, smut, brothers best friend , namjoon fanfic -synopsis; You move in with your father and brother while your mother is away, one of you're brother's best friends becomes interested in you but you're relationship has to be kept a secret. index

✧ DEEP

Series; not completed | angst, smut, fake dating, contract, yoongi fanfic - synopsis; you're in love with your childhood friend but he does not see you more than just a friend. One day you ask him to be more than just friends, he agrees. index

✧ Snatch

Series; not completed | only available on AO3 | mafia au, smut, content warning, yoongi fanfic - synopsis; your father becomes an undercover cop and succeeds in locking up one of the most wanted criminal, only for him to escape prison and come after you in order to return your father the favor.

✧ Snatch (alternative version)

Series; not completed | only available on AO3 | mafia au, smut, content warning, yoongi fanfic - synopsis; your father becomes an undercover cop and succeeds in locking up one of the most wanted criminal, only for him to escape prison and come after you in order to return your father the favor. index

✧ Blue Heart

Series; discontinued | only available on AO3 | fluff, smut, establish relationship, jungkook fanfic - synopsis; after moving into your new neighborhood you encounter your neighbor who is the same age and grade as you. He discovers your secrets and falls in love with everything you hate about yourself.

✧ Kalopsia (not released yet)

series; wip | smut, pregnancy, arranged marriage - synopsis; index

✧ karmic Soulmates (Tumblr exclusive)

series; wip | smut, gang au, gun violance - synopsis; you run a cafe, live in a quiet city. you're life is normal just as everyone else, but not everyone seems to be who they seem. what do you do when your soulmate appears again and pulls you back into the world you had been running from for six years. Chapter 1

✧

All stories are my original works. Do not copy or translate! drabbles/mini series are only available on tumblr.

Disclaimer: All stories have strong language & mature content :)

+ I write mature books anyone under the age of 18 should not read, my books are not for the weak of heart. I write messed up stories with messed up endings.

Drabbles can become a full series or a short one, your opinions matter! let me know if there is a drabble you really like! but this is honestly a list of stories I want to write one day... :)

check out my w.i.p :)

*･ﾟ:*･ﾟ:*✧*:･ﾟ*Jungkook *･ﾟ:*✧*:･ﾟ**･ﾟ*

Karmic Soulmates |JJK

✧ Pairing: Jungkook x reader

✧ warning(s): explicit language, suggestive content, mature content

✧ genre: angst,fluff,smut,fake dating au,contract

✧ synopsis; you run a cafe, live in a quiet city. you're life is normal just as everyone else, but not everyone seems to be who they seem. what do you do when your soulmate appears again and pulls you back into the world you had been running from for six years.

|1|2|3|

━━ LOVE TALK.

❛ i mean, i want to eat your pussy? you know, give you... oral sex? ❜

━ PAIRING: jungkook x fem!reader.

━ RATING: +18

━ GENRE: smut, fluff, tiniest bit of angst.

━ AU: established relationship, pwp.

━ CONTENT: oral sex (f. receiving), dirty talk, praise, fingering, teeny tiniest bit of overstimulation, very inexperienced and painfully shy!oc, pussy eating enthusiast!jk.

━ WORD COUNT: 3,1k.

━ NOTE: this was my first request :’) i don’t remember much, but it was specified that oc had to be very inexperienced and awkward, so if you don’t like that, KEEP IT TO YOUR DAMN SELF. i kinda like her, i wanna protecc. OKAY KOONIGHT ANGELS~♡

check out my masterlist here.

It’s your typical Sunday night-in with Jungkook; you lie in bed covered by blankets and resting on too many pillows watching whatever movie, tv-show or anime one of you chose. To be quite frank, you never pay too much attention to the anime Jungkook picks, not because he has bad taste or anything, but because everything happens so fast you can’t even begin to process what’s going on. Still, when it comes to anime, you always let Jungkook choose, no matter how many times he says you can read the descriptions and pick one yourself. You don’t care if you don’t understand the animes he likes, not when he can’t spend more than thirty seconds without chiming in an excited commentary about it; you act as if it annoys you, of course, but sometimes you think that it is the best part of spending your Sunday nights with him.

Surprisingly, Jungkook is pretty silent tonight, but you don’t question him or think too much of it because finally, finally, you’re watching an anime that you can sort of understand. This time, you’re the one who is so immersed in the story that you don’t even realize you’re the only one paying attention, too focused on watching in horror how the lanky, awkward main character turns into a cynical psychopath splashing blood everywhere as he takes his revenge on every single person that ever crossed him. With your heartbeat ringing in your ears, you cover your eyes and peek through the space you left between them while you wait for the scene to be over; you were never a big fan of gore.

The bed dips next to you, distracting you for a hot second before you assume it’s just Jungkook trying to get into a more comfortable position, so you don’t give it much thought and focus on the show again, but your eyes betray you once again when, out of the corner of your eye, you see Jungkook staring at you, his face slightly illuminated by the screen of his laptop.

You jump and let out a comical squeak when Jungkook’s warm hand pushes yours away from your face. One of his slender fingers lifts your chin and tilts your head, leaving you both staring at each other face to face. You look back at him with curiosity, raising your eyebrows as if to silently question his actions, but you only get the same silence and a dreamy smile in return.

“You’re so fucking cute,” he whispers, his eyes sparkling under the artificial light.

You groan and roll your eyes at him, opting to look down at his chest in hopes he doesn’t notice how quickly four words and a faint smile from him can affect you. “I was paying attention, you ass.”

"No, no, I noticed!" he says with a mischievous edge on his voice. You huff in mock offense, pouting when he leans down and press a fleeting kiss on the corner of your mouth. "But wouldn't you rather I gave you all my attention instead?"

Oh no, that's his bedroom voice.

A tiny and stubborn whimper escapes your parted lips despite you trying to suppress it. You begin to panic. You still don't get what exactly it is that Jungkook sees in you; you never got out of the shy and awkward phase from your teenage years; you still laugh, involuntarily, like a small child whenever he flirts with you; you don't know how to flirt back, even worse, you don’t even know how to woo him with your best assets that took way longer to appear than they did to your friends.

You just don’t get it, but no matter how you see yourself, Jungkook has always looked at you like you’re the only thing he desires.

You snap out of your thoughts when you notice him staring at your lips and you mimic his actions, looking at his parted lips before you give in to the heaviness of your eyelids, closing your eyes and waiting for him to take the first step as he always eagerly does. But seconds pass and his lips never meet yours, causing you to release the breath you were holding in and leaving you embarrassed when he kisses your cheek instead.

You open your eyes and let out another groan, this time out of pure exasperation, half-heartedly hitting his chest as he laughs at your expense.

"If you want a kiss that bad, you have to come and get it," he teases. "I'm not going to kiss you unless you do it first."

You huff, knowing damn well he’d never give in to you, so you let out a shaky breath and cup his cheeks in your hands, feeling the barely-there stubble tickling your palms. Jungkook waits patiently, staring back at you with challenging yet welcoming eyes as yours take one last look at his lips before you close them and press your lips against his in a chaste kiss.

His hands rest on your lower back and press you tightly against his hard body, moving his lips against yours and swallowing your ragged breaths. His tongue licks your bottom lip and bites down on it gently, sucking it and then licking the flesh to soothe the bite, inviting you to open your mouth for him.

He pushes your hair away from your neck and rubs your soft skin before letting his hand fall to your waist, squeezing it through your shirt and using his grip to grind your body against his. You’re so lost in the kiss that you barely noticed when his hand moved from your waist, gasping into his mouth as his hand cups your breast and squeezes it gently.

“Jungkook,” you call out his name in a whimper. “What—"

"I want to make you feel good," he purrs in your ear, his hand leaving your chest and resting on your neck. You know that he is giving you time to decide whether to consent or not this time as well. "Is that okay with you? Do you want to?"

His eyes, though hooded and dark, never leave yours. Jungkook has never pressured you into doing something you don’t want to, much less coercing you to do something he wants but you don’t.

You nod your head and let out a small yes, closing your eyes and as he tilts your head to nuzzle his face on the crook of your neck. He breathes in your scent and presses his tongue against your skin, licking a fat stripe before closing his mouth and sucking a small, painless bruise on it. You feel your underwear sticking to your folds, you're so wet you should be ashamed.

Abruptly, Jungkook detaches himself from your neck and slams his laptop shut before pushing it away. He turns his attention back to you and pushes your inner thigh with the back of his hand to position himself between your legs, covering your body with his. His strong hands help you settle your head on the pillows, the hard bulge in his sweatpants unintentionally grinding against your crotch, making you moan at the sweet friction of the head of his cock nudging your clit.

You wonder if Jungkook can feel how wet you are. You find it embarrassing knowing your soaked panties are staining the crotch of his sweatpants, but Jungkook looks at you with so much lust that the shame turns into excitement in a matter of seconds.

He presses his forehead against yours, his eyes pleading with yours to keep looking at him. You smile, endeared by his sparkling doe eyes, but you flinch as a reflex seconds later when his hand cups your breast, kneading it softly over the fabric of the t-shirt you borrowed from his closet earlier.

"I don't want you to get nervous, alright?" You look at him and nod your head. "I want to eat you out.”

You frown at the foreign words, feeling stupid as yet again your naiveness puts you to shame. Still, Jungkook smiles and looks at you like you hung the moon just for him to see.

"I mean," he trails off as he tries to figure out what to say to make you understand better. "I want to eat your pussy? You know, give you… oral sex?"

Your breath gets caught in your throat at his obscene choice of words, ashamed of how much they turn you on.

You don't understand why he would want to do something like that, surely it wouldn't be pleasurable for him. "But you won’t feel good," you pout.

He gives you one of those smiles where he wrinkles his nose and his eyes sparkle. Talk about duality. "Don't worry, baby," he assures you. "You don't know how many times I've imagined how you taste," his voice gets an octave lower to leave you hanging to his every word. "How many times I jacked off thinking about how you would react when my tongue finally tastes your sweet folds and I have you at my mercy playing with your pussy however I want. I promise you, baby, it will feel just as good for me as it does for you."

If your life were an animated movie, you're sure your cheeks start comically burning in flames and your heart pounding out of your chest.

The truth is, you've only had sex with Jungkook twice, having given him your virginity after a year and a half of dating, but up until now, you’ve never heard him voice out his fantasies before, let alone talk to you in such an explicit way.

"Please," you say confidently despite the tremor in your voice. "Make me feel good."

Jungkook leans into you and kisses you slowly, trailing his palm from your chest to the hem of your shirt, lifting it to reveal the warm skin of your stomach. His tongue plays with yours as his hand sneaks under the fabric of your cotton panties, his mouth swallowing the gasp you let out. His fingers collect your juices and he uses them to massage your sensitive folds.

"My sweet girl...You're dripping," he mutters against your lips and smirks when he hears you moan. He presses your foreheads together and looks down at where you unconsciously started rubbing your cunt with his hand. "You're going to like it so much," he says as the pad of his middle finger finds your clit and plays with it. "I'm going to make you cum so hard. I'm going to swallow everything your pussy gives me."

He gives you one last, long kiss before he takes his hand off your underwear, lowering himself until his head is in between your thighs. Your fingers curl on his fluffy hair to keep your hands from shaking, but when he looks at you through his eyelashes, he smiles and you instantly relax. His lips leave kisses on your inner thighs while his finger presses down on your clothed clit, barely rubbing circles on it and making you tremble even more. His eyes never leave yours as he licks the wet patch in the center of your panties before he pushes them aside to take a look at your glistening cunt.

“You're so pretty,” he says as he drags his thumb across your slit, collecting your juices and spreading them on your folds. "So, so pretty."

The tip of his tongue licks a fat stripe on your slit, teasing your folds before closing his lips on your clit and rubbing it gently. You sigh and throw your head back against the pillows, covering your face with the inside of your arm to escape his burning gaze.

His lips leave your cunt with a popping sound and he says, "I want to see you," he murmurs against your pussy and traps your clit with his lips again, suckling on it and drawing out moans from your mouth before pulling away again. "Please show me your face."

You hesitantly move your arm away from your face but refuse to open your eyes. Still, you can feel him smiling against you and you hope he doesn't notice the gush of fluids dripping out of your pussy and wetting the sheets because you're imagining him like that.

“My baby is always so good to me,” he praises you, calming your nerves a little. There's something about the way he holds your thighs apart, something intimate and just right. "I'm going to take your panties off now, ‘that okay?"

You nod your head and let out a small yes, lifting your hips to help him slide your panties down your legs. He spreads your legs again and admires the way you shudder under his touch. "It's okay, baby," he whispers and places a kiss on your inner thigh. "It's okay, I got you."

The way he holds you, his hands steady and confident, and the sweet tone of his voice overwhelms you in both a good and bad way, but you try to relax and opt to grip the bedsheets in clenched fists. You feel stupid when hot tears escape from your closed eyes; you know you have nothing to be ashamed of, Jungkook knows that you are inexperienced because of how shy you are yet he loves you, wants you, and would never judge you.

Jungkook doesn't move at all, giving you as much time as you need to calm down. You inhale, exhale and look at him. His eyes stare back at you and don't wander anywhere else, he keeps them focused on you even when he kisses the back of your hand, taking advantage of your fists unclenching for long enough to grab your hands with his and intertwine your fingers.

“Do you want me to keep going? If you want me to stop I will,” he kisses your knuckles and looks at you tenderly. "I will not get mad. I promise."

“I want you,” your voice comes out small and you're afraid he hasn't heard you. "I want you. Please."

And just like that, Jungkook’s tongue is back on your cunt, gathering your juices and swallowing them before sucking and pulling your lips. You whine in embarrassment at the sounds that come out of his mouth when he tastes, slurps, and drinks your juices. But he doesn't give you much time to complain when his right hand leaves yours and he uses it to part your lips with his index and middle fingers, exposing your cunt to him and having him groaning at the sight of your glistening folds.

You can't hold in the sounds coming out of your mouth, moaning and crying as Jungkook gets back to devouring your soul through your pussy. You look down and whimper pathetically at how focused he looks; his eyebrows are furrowed, his eyes shut tight, and his hips thrusting against the bed as if letting him eat your pussy was the best thing that has ever happened to him. He's enjoying this almost as much as you are, alternating between sucking the juices out of your entrance, licking your velvety folds, or drawing messy figures on your clit at the perfect speed.

You feel dizzy, your body trembling as his mouth works wonders on your body, making you regret the time you pushed his head away from between your legs the second time you had sex.

Jungkook delights himself with all the juices you're gushing out, slurping and drinking it all before closing his lips around your clit and flicking his tongue from side to side as fast as he can. Your free hand grabs his hair and pulls him even closer to you, moaning loudly, and he seems to like that cause he growls and his mouth works even harder.

Tears stream down your cheeks, this time because of how good it feels. You close your eyes and you arch your back at the pleasure, squeezing his hand tightly and gasping when the tip of his middle finger prods into your hole.

He pulls away from you to say, “Breathe baby,” you do your best to relax and let out a pitiful cry. He just smiles to himself and pushes his finger in. "Feels good, hm?"

Any trace of shame leaves your body as he resumes his task on your clit, adding the stimulation of his finger curling inside you and rubbing that sweet spot only his cock has reached before. Your walls clench tightly around his finger and he lets out an airy chuckle, his breath hitting your cunt and making you whine more.

"’S so good," you whimper. “Making me feel so good, Jungkook. ‘M c-cumming, ohmygod."

Jungkook doesn’t stop sucking or moving his tongue on your clit for a single second, not when he can feel your pussy throbbing in his tongue and clenching around his finger. He knows you're close, he knows exactly what you look like when you start to fall apart, so he curls his finger harder and faster inside you and keeps moving his mouth on your pussy even if his jaw is begging him for a break.

You barely notice when you started to cry and try to close your legs around Jungkook’s head, but he just let go of your hand and uses his free arm to lift your legs up from behind your knees, almost bending you in half but leaving your pussy in perfect display for him to devour it until you’re crying and cumming for the first time in his mouth.

Time seems to stop for the two of you, the sound of your heavy breaths being the only thing you can hear until Jungkook gets back to sucking on your entrance and lapping at your folds, not wanting to waste a single drop of your sweet juices.

“I'm sorry,” he apologizes when you start squirming and complaining about how sensitive you are. "Pussy tastes so good."

When he’s finally satisfied, Jungkook lowers your legs and spreads them apart to position himself in between them with no ulterior motives. He grins at you as he licks his lips and sucks the remains of your juices off his fingers. Your stomach clenches and you swear if your face could get any hotter it would, so you hide it with your hands.

"Hey, don't get all shy on me now," he teases, getting up and sitting on his knees in front of you to grab your wrists with one hand and pull your hands away from your face. "Thank you for trusting me."

“Thank you for loving me,” you reply and push him down with you.

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