Sid Vicious - Tumblr Posts
I kinda feel like Sid Vicious towards my girlfriend. Think about the romanticization of Sid and Nancy's story. Think about that scene in Pistol where he says "Nancy is my fucking queen". I would carve her name into my chest. That's how I feel.
sid and nancy photographed by watal asanuma at their flat in London on August 4, 1978. 🖤
when sid vicious *from the sex pistols* got punched in the face.
his chest says ‘gimme a fix’
dallas texas, 1978.
here is sid vicious from the sex pistols 😳
the sex pistols
radio station, luxembourg
november 2nd 1977
sid vicious with his bass
crybaby.
pairings. louis partridge x fem!reader
about. you’ve been hurt by louis many times, but you don’t want to let him go.
warnings. foul language, lil millie slander 😁, crybaby moment (not bad)
ricky rocks. this story was written at different points in time so 😭 forgive if it don’t make sense
you should have let it be.
ignorance is bliss.
but you weren’t ignorant. you never were and never would be and louis knew that since day one, but he always chose to ignore it, always hoping your love for him would blind you enough to let things go.
but he mistakes your love for something it isn’t, and time after time it kicks him in the ass
11:45 am — y/n: dinner at my house at six
he really only got back to you at later hours of the day due to his life conducting of sleeping, drinking, and sometimes working out if he really wanted; which was rare and almost never till his boredom killed his brain.
4:27 pm — lou: got it.
he didn’t show up. you weren’t surprised, but you still had hoped you would have caught him at a time where he was feeling considerate. guess not.
you didn’t see him for awhile after that, mainly because you were pissed and wanted to give him the silent treatment. otherwise you usually would have been at his house and in his bed within the same day he ditched out on you. the only thing that was different this time was the fact that he also ditched out on your mother too.
it was always hard to explain your dynamic with louis to people, especially your own mother, and even as she loved him dearly, she hoped better for you and urged you to end things with him. you had thought about it many, many times, but it just never happened.
you were attached to him, no matter how many times he broke your heart.
he called a week later, a call you missed, but lucky for you he had left a voicemail.
“eh, love, i’m going to be away from the next couple of days, don’t wait up on me, alright?” he laughs and you smile shamelessly at the sound while it echoed out from your phone for a good second. “i know you will anyways, but yeah, see ya, love ya.” the message is close to cutting off until it seems he remembers something just seconds before he’s about to hang up. “sorry about the other night. tell your mother i love her and your house is the first stop when i get back.”
lie. you knew he would forget that promise, but at least he apologized this time.
lou was an interesting person to say the least; he had no problem saying i love you, he said it before you did, but he hated affection outside of closed doors. any of it, there was a rare chance to ever catch him in such a touchy mood around friends, family, and in public.
he was shitty at communication, but almost couldn’t go a day without you when in the same rural area. he liked to flaunt your relationship all over the internet but got fairly embarrassed whenever the two of you went out on dates.
it was borderline hell.
sometimes you wondered if he even liked you, and you almost doubted it if it weren’t for times when you hung out and the reassurance was there… until he left again. you felt anxious without him.
when you first ever met louis, you tried hard for him. you were always on your toes about how you looked, what you did, what you said—all to make sure no bumps were hit. you spent a significant amount of time crying in the beginning, still did.
“lou, i’m calling,” you bit your lip hard, wondering whether or not you should even be calling. “calling, just wondering if you’re alright, it’s been a week and i just haven’t heard from you… bye love, call me.”
please call me.
he didn’t call.
“louis, calling again, please pick up.”
no pick up.
“i’m starting to worry for you, love. just send a message or something, bye.”
no message.
“louis, i have your life360 location on, you bimbo, answer your fucking phone.”
oh you were crazy.
things escalated fast after you recalled that you had his location, where you immediately checked to see that he was exactly at his house... and then her house.
millie, of course.
you had always had speculation that there was something going on between the two of them ever sense you had first met her and she could barely stay away from him for more than a minute.
he always denied, but you didn’t trust it. especially not now. millie was one of the most flirty girls you had ever met; she spoke with her hands, and could barely keep hers off his arms or shoulders, and even face.
they way he spoke about her never eased your thoughts. it seemed like he didn’t like her, but yet he always found himself at her house whenever he wasn’t with you. it was a punch in the face.
“louis, this is the last time i’m going to call you. i can’t do this. i know what you want, and it’s not me anymore.”
you were cursing at yourself for giving up already, so easily; without a second thought—but the thing was, you had given him so much time. you just didn’t want to let him go, no matter what.
the knock on your door was the answer to your prayers; because two days later, there he stood on your doorstep, smiling softly.
you were losing your mind at the sight, surprised, even though you should have expected him.
“hi, love.”
“oh, louis,” your hand pressed against your forehead, your eyes stinging from embarrassment knowing damn well that the only reason he was here was because of the voicemails.
“don’t cry,” he stepped in without invitation, pulling you to him with a sympathetic smile, “you’re worked up over nothing, baby,”
“oh, my god,” you shook your head, “i’m sorry.” you could feel your heart aching.
“don’t be sorry,” the hand he didn’t have around your waist was pressed against your cheek. his smile was soft but pressed into a thin line, not knowing what to make of you. “don’t be a crybaby, you’re okay.”
crybaby.
“you break my heart sometimes, lou,” you had your head pressed in the crook of his neck, regaining your composure. he held you, rubbing circles on your back as you spoke lowly.
“i know, sweetheart.”
navigation.
@aliyahsutherland @ioveisabel @multifandom-obsessed @cryinginsanity @rebbyr @cc13723things @heyitsmeimdead @thehuntress09 @black-rose-29 @rrosecar @instabull @rudypankowisdaddy @lukewearingbeanies @kiramdd @highkeygolden @kitkat-mini @spencybear @w0nderr @deadbeatbarb @phantompogues @i-love-scott-mccall @greengarsstuff @rowena-ravenclaws-diadem @felixulvr @demigirl-with-problems @whoreforpsychopaths @siriusspuppyy @mxsmwndr
god, forgive me.
pairings. louis partridge x fem!reader
part two of n/a parts.
about. maybe lighting a girl on fire has more pros than cons?
warnings. foul language
ricky rocks. about time i update lol
seeing stacey golifolk get lit on fire was about the funniest thing louis had ever seen.
everything slowly went to shit and he just absorbed it all with a laugh caught in the back of his throat, rubbing his palms against his thighs as he couldn’t move anything else; completely glued to his seat.
not long after you pressed the gold staff against the cape did you drop the thing on the ground underestimating on how fast the cape would fully light on fire. you had jumped away quickly like a startled cat, eyes wide and a feeling of astonishment bursting through your chest at the chaotic sight.
now stacey wasn’t fully lit on fire, but rather just the old silk cape and some of her pretty hair, but otherwise, she was completely fine and safe the moment father george had come to realization what was happening and tackled her to the ground, then attempting to cease her wailing.
your eyes went wider and any urge to laugh was caught in the back of your throat as you felt multiple eyes on you now and the realization of how dumb of an idea it was.. came to light.
you could only imagine what odessa was thinking right at that moment, but you knew it wouldn’t be good.
**
“what a fucking show,” finn was clapping slowly as he made his way toward the corner of the courtyard where enya and sabrina already stood with not so impressed looks. “i think maybe they should crown bimbo blondes more often if that’s what entails every time,” finn begun to light a cigarette, “no offense sab.”
“none taken,” she raised her hand slightly, waving him off in a timid way. she could still smell burning hair and she didn’t find it amusing as much as finn did with the slim fact that stacy was a friend of hers, and she’d definitely be hearing about it whenever the girl decide her now half balding self. “just don’t vote me in.”
“no promises, sweetheart,” he leaned in with a wink causing her to scowl before snatching the cigarette that he had placed between his two fingers.
“okay, chuckles,” she rolled her eyes, taking a drag from the cigarette, “who even was that girl?”
“probably some ninth year,” finn tsked, “all those newbies are crazy this year.”
“no way,” enya shook her head, “how do you guys not know chicago, we’ve been going to school with her since elementary.”
“sorry, never heard of her,” finn extended his hand out, leaning against the wall.
“you would know her if you saw, you’re both potheads. you guys have noses for each other.”
“funny,” he scowls, taking a drag.
“now was that a show, or was that a show?” josh was grinning from ear to ear as he came stumbling into the courtyard with louis stumbling behind him. “almost thought i was seeing things for a minute.”
“oh, man, you know what i was thinking,” finn smiles now, looking between each of them as he now slings his arm around josh and sabrina, an idea popping into his mind. “now that it seems that all hell has broke loose here at saint mary’s, why don’t we ditch this place.”
“and do what?”
“what do you mean ‘and do what?’ sabrina, what do we always do?” he practically pulls her into a headlock with the arm he has around her, looking down on her like she was one of the dumbest people he had ever met.
“are you okay, lou,” enya interrupts the beginning of their bickering, noticing louis who seems like he is straying away slowly from the group as he tips back and forth on his feet. “you don’t look so hot.”
“thanks,” his voice is tart as he looks at her, his face almost turned sour with narrowed brows.
she wasn’t lying and suddenly they all take note of the sweat beading in his hairline and the redness of his cheeks. he looked winded, stressed out as he looks between each of his friends, but not directly into their eyes.
“you sure you’re alright?”
“fine.”
“josh, what’d you give him?”
“hey, hey, hey,” josh swings up his arms in defense, “why did this suddenly get turned on me?”
“because… you practically have pain killers and oxy falling out of your pockets, now what’d you pop to lou?”
“jesus, what is with all of you,” louis looks between each of them, “need to fucking relax, i’m fine.”
“don’t look fine.”
he ignored sabrina’s comment as he looks to finn, motioning at him, “now what’s this plan about ditching school?”
**
“chicago, you are about the dumbest bitch i have ever met.”
“i hear that a lot,” you were grinning from ear to ear as you sat into a slump on one of the park benches laid in the outer grounds of the school, lighting a cigarette.
she ignored you, continuing, “you’re lucky they didn’t kick you from school or even punish you,” odessa shook her head as she paced back and forth in front of you—who couldn’t care less. “jesus, chicago, getting high everyday is one thing, but lighting a girl on fire? you’re fucking insane.”
“she fucking deserved it,” you giggled, shaking your head. “my luck is unmatched, o, should know that by now.”
“no kidding,” she shook her head before finally looking at you straight on. “try to restrain yourself from fucking someone else’s life up today, i’m going to class.” she didn’t even try to coax you to come with her to class, she was over it.
after everything was under control and half the students were in the court yard, father george had called you into his office where two other teachers stood beside him, overseeing the meeting—something you were sure was an intimidation method to get you to speak the truth—which didn’t work, obviously.
he had asked you if you had purposefully laid the staff on stacy, to which you said no and begged to be forgiven, popping a few tears. he fell for it like a fool, letting you off with only a small lecture to be more mindful.
odessa wasn’t very fond of this outcome, hoping you’d face some sort of punishment. sometimes you wondered if she really cared about you—which she did, you just both had very different ideas of how you should live. she had hoped if you were punished, or expelled, you would come upon a reality check and get your life straight.
that obviously wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.
“well i be damned, it’s the devil herself.”
somehow seeing you out and about was absolutely barreling to finn. he wasn’t sure whether or not he was seeing things correctly, but by the way you were looking at him, he was guessing yes.
“you stopping and staring and acting like you know every other person does not help us get to our objective.”
“are you fucking stupid, mate,” finn sends an elbow into josh’s gut, motioning out to you, “it’s the star of the show today, the leading lady, our lord and savior! josh are you blind?”
josh squints at you as you squint back, frowning hard at this already strange interaction. you knew people that went here were strange, but not this strange.
recognition kicks in for josh and a grin slowly crawls up onto his face, “chicago, you really saved us in there from that head girl and head boy bullshit, i’m sure louis would have to agree. that’s the best thing since jerry coles let one rip louder than… well whatever is loud.”
what the fuck. who were these people?
“yeah, don’t mention it,” you looked between the two who stared at you like a zoo animal, completely amazed by the simplest movement.
“i’ve heard you got a fix for the devil’s lettuce, how about we thank you and smoke you up?”
your ears immediately perk up to this and you suddenly couldn’t sit still on the bench, “sign me up,” you stood up, swinging your arms around both of the strangers, “just give me when and where and i’ll be there, boys.”
navigation.
@aliyahsutherland @ioveisabel @multifandom-obsessed @cryinginsanity @rebbyr @cc13723things @heyitsmeimdead @thehuntress09 @black-rose-29 @rrosecar @instabull @rudypankowisdaddy @lukewearingbeanies @kiramdd @kitkat-mini @spencybear @w0nderr @deadbeatbarb @phantompogues @i-love-scott-mccall @greengarsstuff @rowena-ravenclaws-diadem @felixulvr @demigirl-with-problems @whoreforpsychopaths @mxsmwndr @andrewgarfields-girlfriend @xivilivix @morganaah @eichenhouseproperty @alliechickens @moonlighy @ancientimes @thelaststraw3 @i44nishi @iluvt4ylorswift @liltimmyst @falcvns @alexxavicry @grxcisxhy-wp @esposadomd
god, forgive me.
part three of n/a.
ricky rocks. i always forget to update this story even though it's my favorite plot tbh
kathaholics 🦵
finn guess who we just fucking found
sab god himself?
josh we were a little more luckier than that
enya luckier than god?
enya can't wait to hear this
josh the bitch who lit stacy on fire
finn she's coming to smoke with us
sab oh great, another deadbeat to add to our group
josh how could you say that, chicago is a national treasure
josh she did what no one else could do
sab josh, she basically committed arson
finn no, we weren't lucky enough for that
finn more like, third degree burns
josh arson would be like if stacy had just completely disintegrated
josh which sadly did not even come close to happening
"these two jackasses would get themselves expelled if they ever talk like this in public."
"what do you mean?" enya snorts, "they talk like this all the time in public. neither of them have a filtered thought to save them."
louis watches the continuation string of messages between finn and josh dogging on stacy golifolk feed through his screen within their groupchat to no end. he lied in the back of their rec room on an old dusty chair while sabrina and enya continued to discuss how stupid their two friends were.
"louis, you ready to go soon?"
louis perked his head up to sabrina's inquiry, finding both of them looking at him now.
"what?"
"the graveyard," she nodded, "ditching school... remember?"
louis dips his head back as if suddenly being hit with recollection, “oh yeah, uh… no.”
“no?” sabrina is on her knees know, hanging off the back of the couch as she looks at him in surprisal.
“yeah, you seemed to have heard me correctly.”
“okay, no need to be rude about it, blockhead,” enya barges in, looking widely distasteful to his disinterest. “you’re the one who wanted to go.”
“and now i don’t.”
enya rolls her eyes before mumbling, “fucking cunt,” then turning back around to sit normally on the orange couch both her and sab were on. sab still watched him, more with confusion than annoyance that enya was hunkering.
“what’s up with you?”
kathaholics 🦵
josh yo, wtm
josh i got my bag and we already hopped the fence, so the rest of you fuckers better be on the way
sab looks up from her phone as he still scanned josh's messages, “so, you going or not?”
louis feels a strain of annoyance in his chest and a flash of heat flare upon his face; anger. for some reason, he felt a large amount of annoyance and irritation with sabrina still talking to him even after his rejection. he felt this a lot lately, and not just with sabrina, but right now she was putting the cherry on top of increasing his bad mood.
“fuck off, sabrina.”
**
“do you fuckers have no sense of time?”
“relax fuck face, you act like your mental watch is so good.”
“when weed’s involved, it’s immaculate.”
enya gave a hefty sigh before swinging her bag onto her designated seat. she then looked up, analyzing the three sets of red eyes before her, she smirks, “well, well, well, if it isn’t the woman of the hour.”
“my fellow candle stick holder.”
sabrina rolls her eyes as you and enya lean toward one another to shake hands, and you’re just beaming with a thin pressed smile of amusement. she couldn’t believe this was happening.
“ladies, take a seat. you know where you belong,” josh extends his arms out to the dusty old cushions that filled the area across from him
the graveyard was an old abandoned boys school from the 1950s that was never tore down, but rather left for catholic delinquents to discover and deem as there smoke spot. the five of them currently sat in a rusty old school bus that was cleared of most its seats and replaced with scruffy old couch cushions, bean bags, and really anything to provide comfort.
you were beyond amazed at the craftsmanship when your two new friends pulled you into what was the perfect smoke spot. your urge to spark up had increased immediately upon the sight, cutting your tour short and landing all three of you on the couch shoved all the way to the back.
“aye, where is louis at?”
“his cunt ass decided he didn’t want to come,” the sour tone of enya's voice suddenly covered every part of the bus, making everyone look up to her.
you were quick to catch onto the look josh and finn share over you despite being in your high state. her tone was very sobering and somehow you felt ten times more aware of everything all because of her clear distaste for this louis boy.
“fuck, why is that?”
“fuck if i know, louis has a fuckin’ stick up his ass lately.”
“isn’t that right.”
“sorry, who are we talking about?” your face screws up while you pass on the blunt you had to finn, looking between each of them subtly.
“louis partridge,” finn inhales “brown hair, brown eyes, and apparently a recent stick inputted into his ass.”
“such a clear decipher, almost like you didn’t just describe every walking fuck in our school,” enya rolls her eyes at finn and the vague features he offered, then looking to you. "he's the same year as us, was going to be top boy."
her provided information wasn't anymore of a help either.
"what?" however, a burst of energy seized through the group upon the relevance of it.
"lou was going to be top boy?" sabrina's posture was pulled straight as the rest of them, looking for clarification from enya--all she does is shrug.
"no wonder louis has been such a prick lately. he has to start fulfilling the roll," finn chuckles to himself, slowly starting to slouch back down. "too good for us."
"hey, whatever man, good for him," josh lightly taps finn, "maybe we'll finally get coed bathrooms and cig breaks like we've been petitioning for since first year sense we know someone on the board now."
"you guys are disgusting," enya rolls her eyes.
"what, you think they won't go for the dart breaks between class?"
you think enya's eyes are about to fall out of her head by the amount of eye rolls she's had in the past five minutes. you suppress your snicker as she looks at them with a dead stare.
"yeah, good luck with that one," she readjusts herself. "louis doesn't seem to give a damn about us, let alone your first year petitions."
"cmon, en, it was just one thing. he was only pissy because of coming down off of whatever josh gave him this morning," sabrina's voice lightens in defense of him, pushing enya further in annoyance.
"it wasn't just one thing. he's been a dick for the past couple of months. you can't tell me he hasn't when we're the ones who always have to deal with it because these two dimwits are too high half the time to even speak," her pointer finger jabs in your general direction in reference to both finn and josh who seemed shocked to her accusation. "tell me you didn't forget just because you've known him for so long."
there are hints of more spite that intertwined within the sentence, and you wonder why.
"well, I have known him for a long time."
"we all have, sab, but I don't forget his bitch fits because of it."
"oh, cmon, enya, don't you think you're being kinda harsh?" josh motions mindlessly with the hand that isn't propped behind his head. "you're just still pressed about him throwing out your booze stash."
"yeah, and you would be too if it was your pot."
"yeah, well at least I'm smart enough to not bring it around him when he's asked you not to," he takes a hit, his nonchalantness pissing her off. "plus, you're the one who put it in his room."
"suck me off," she grumbles, finally throwing herself into the cushions as if finally giving up. "he shouldn't be friends with alcoholics when he doesn't want to become one himself."
silence, but you still wonder;
"who's louis again?"
@aliyahsutherland @ioveisabel @multifandom-obsessed @cryinginsanity @rebbyr @cc13723things @heyitsmeimdead @thehuntress09 @black-rose-29 @rrosecar @instabull @rudypankowisdaddy @lukewearingbeanies @kiramdd @kitkat-mini @spencybear @w0nderr @deadbeatbarb @phantompogues @i-love-scott-mccall @greengarsstuff @rowena-ravenclaws-diadem @felixulvr @demigirl-with-problems @whoreforpsychopaths @mxsmwndr @andrewgarfields-girlfriend @xivilivix @morganaah @eichenhouseproperty @alliechickens @moonlighy @ancientimes @thelaststraw3 @i44nishi @iluvt4ylorswift @liltimmyst @falcvns @alexxavicry @grxcisxhy-wp @esposadomd
cherry pie.
pairings. louis partridge x fem!reader
summary. reader never would have thought about getting high until she seems to have lost all her morals in one night with a boy she had never met before.
warnings. swearing, underage drinking and smoking
ricky rocks. YALL PLEASEEE bare with me. you can probably tell this is an older story because of the format, but just disregard the first half, i know it’s the lower end of my writing. it kinda gets better 😬 (edit: this story is so mid, i’m just trying to clear my drafts)
the room danced with colors, so many colors and shades you seemed to have never seen before. unfamiliar with their cause and purpose, unsure why you couldn’t touch them; it frightened you with the way they moved around, the way they twirled around your head like little ballerinas.
you swallowed, dropping your head back against the grungy brown couch sat in the corner of one of the back rooms of connor’s house, a boy you found yourself calling on day after day for the past two months for fun, and by fun you meant sex.
but tonight, you hadn’t seen the boy for what you could count as hours. there were other things on his mind rather than a high off their ass you. other pretty girls with less clothing on their bodies and longer hair that was paid more attention to than your own.
you couldn’t care less at that point in time as you felt so deep in a haze, nothing could pull your attention. nothing, until the seat next to you sunk in from the pressure of bodyweight and another high body, seeing the same things you were seeing, feeling the same things you were feeling.
he just had it more under control.
“you going to stare at the ceiling all day, love?”
you rolled your head to meet the eyes of a crazed blonde with matching brown eyes. delight swirled in his irises while he looked at you with also dazed eyes, almost ceased shut from swelling of the high. you looked amazed right back at him despite sober you would have been disturbed, never seeing a person so out of their mind.
“who are you?” you stared at him, shocked.
“your new boyfriend,” he wiggled his eyebrows, jumping and readjusting himself up against you, his arm now slinging up and over you shoulders. a new kind of energy swelling through his chest, “i say we go on a date.”
he stared in front of him focused full hearty, as if visualizing something at that moment. you squinted, looking to where he was looking as if trying to see what he was seeing, but not enough weed could put you on his level.
“i say, we leave right now, get some pie, maybe some coke. whatever you like sweetheart, i’ll give it to ya.” “I think your sweetheart wants some space, jake,” your eyes looked from the boy who sat next to you, jake, to the boy who now stood before the two of you, an unimpressed look on his face. his arm reached out to jake, practically yanking him from your side. “alright pal, let’s go for a walk.”
you watched jake stumble into him, “but louis, she’s pretty.”
louis glanced back over his shoulder as he begun to pull jake away from the couch and toward the door, now really coming to your attention. his eyes raked you up and down before smirking a little bit, nodding to himself, “sure man, she is.”
he begun to walk away with jake wrapped around his shoulder before you got up fast almost tripping over your feet, not wanting them to go, “wait, i want a pie.”
he looked back at you and your disoriented self. your shoulders were slung low, making you smaller than you actually were. your hair was all staticky, hanging above your head like a crown, and your eyes; dilated and filled with innocence.
he smirked, looking you up one more time before nodding you over, cuing you to follow after him, his arm still holding jake to his toes.
the boy’s car was blue. louis’ car was blue. it was one of those old, nice, restored cars that must have been worth thousands. the interior had light brown leather seating that made noise every time you shifted and readjusted yourself due to the old springs lying beneath. it made you giggle as you sat next to him in the front seat, jake lying in the back due to him not being just high, but rather cross faded. louis had apparently found him completely plastered out of his mind once he had first arrived at the party, leading him to hand jake a blunt to finalize his out-this-world experience. it wasn’t smart, but it kept louis entertained to say the least.
louis had glanced at you multiple times as he drove through the silent streets. he seemed eager or maybe even a little irritated as he watched you bounce around, lacking the ability to sit still as your eyes darted everywhere, from street lights to stop signs to anything that’d fully occupied your vision.
“have you ever been high before?” he asked, stopped at a stop light with red lights shading upon both your faces.
“nope,” your eyes wandered across the ceiling of his car. you ran your fingers along the soft carpeted interior—strange, but very stimulating and soft—making you feel all fuzzy inside of satisfaction. “louis, i love you car.”
he chuckles lowly, directing his eyes back to the road, “a lot of people do,” his lips were turned upwards into a slight smirk. it made the fuzzy feeling in your stomach turn warm as there was something very satisfying about just the way he looked. “we’re here.”
your eyes flick to the front of you where your visions bursts with neon lights beaming from the large “diner” sign pinned against the small vintage looking building. you're quick to slip out of the car to the euphoric sight.
“y/n!"
you stopped in your tracks at the sound of your name, glancing over your shoulder where your eyes immediately find a group of boys congregating together with one single boy appointed to attention to you.
louis.
"hold on. give me a minute, guys," you watch louis from five feet away, brush his friends off despite the yearning looks of amusement on all of their faces, looking between the both of you. he’s far from bothered or just doesn’t notice; brushing them off before meeting you to where you stood.
it was a wednesday after school. the sweet sound of louis’ voice and sight of his captivating face was the last thing you thought you’d come across. it must’ve been a mutual feeling with the way he looked you up and down, all winded looking.
"you're a hard person to find."
"you've been looking for me?"
"of course," he has a cigarette in his mouth.
"I almost didn't think you were real."
"of course i'm real, sweetheart," he grins harder at you. "that fucked up, were you?"
you snort. if not being able to remember half of what took place that night counted for being fucked up, you took the trophy.
"well, alright. i'll take that as you had a pretty good night."
"one of the best."
“good,” he grins, “that’s a rare occasion for girls like you.”
“girls like me?” you scoff, arching a brow. his sentence could easily be something taken for offence, but the lighthearted tone to his voice only proved he was looking to mess with you.
“yes,” he laughs with you. “usually drinking is the only thing you’d catch a teenage girl doing for non-sober purposes.”
you nod, agreeing, because he wasn’t wrong, “i’ve had a fair amount of experience with alcohol and let me just say, i’ll be steering clear of that for a while.”
“ah,” he tips forward on his feet in amusement. “i could’ve guessed you’re a wild one with your liquor, y/l/n. make some questionable choices.”
you feel your face heat up in thought, “i won’t say you’re wrong.”
louis lets out a small huff of laughter, before pausing all movement. he stares at you for a moment with narrow brows, as if trying his best to read you, “you ever wanna smoke with me, just let me know, alright?” he patted your back before suddenly walking past and away from you. your back was to him now but you could hear pat pat pat of his feet in the grass.
you frown, your eyes finding the cracks of the sidewalk as you think of how brief and unusual that was. you feel a large hole in your chest of unfulfillment.
“louis, wait,” you shifted around rather quickly as a reality hit you, but you didn’t make any moves to chase after him. he turned as well as if waiting for it. “you uh, you didn’t tell connor i was with you guys, did you?”
yikes.
that’s not what he wanted to hear.
louis pinched the bud of his cigarette, nodding to himself, thinking contently to his answer before exhaling, a thick cloud of white swirling out into the air before your eyes. you feel dazed, still high from the days before, filled with such naïve joy and lost thoughts of things you couldn’t remember now.
he threw his cigarette on the ground, eyes meeting yours again, only they were hard now and filled with no light heartedness like all times before. and his voice wasn’t soft or full of amusement either but dry as he stared you dead in the eyes, “why, he your boyfriend?”
your teeth sunk into your bottom lip, your eyes not meeting his for a while until after you thought about your answer. and it was an easy answer, no, but it was never something you’d ever consider a question.
“no, no he’s not.”
“you sure about that?”
“not my type,” you smile slightly, examining louis’ pale cheekbones and facial features, the cold of the weather turning his complexion slowly red. your eyes drag to reach his red chapped lips.
him, he was your type.
“enough of your type for you to fuck him,” he gave you a pointed look as if he had caught you in the act of something, and almost immediately your cheeks burned, like you were caught for something you knew you shouldn’t have been doing.
you didn't understand why or how he knew. louis was someone you didn't know at all and what you and connor did was something you didn't tell anyone.
"you're surprised?"
"yes."
"why do you care what he knows, let alone fuck him?" he doesn't say anything more on how he knows like you hoped he would. "if he's not your type?"
you bite into your bottom lip, wincing because you didn't know the answer to it, "I don't."
"but you do," he slightly smiles but it's only out of annoyance as his voice catches up to cut you off on your lie. "I think you do, y/n. and you just don't want him to know we kissed."
"your mouth tastes like cherry."
"so does yours."
fuck.
"no, louis..." you wince, immediately regretting stopping him. "that's not what I meant. he doesn't mean anything to me."
he scoffs, "funny."
he doesn't believe you. not even close.
"you know he has label on you."
"a what?" you frown immediately, taking a step forward out of instinct.
“i’m a fool to think you’d ever stop liking him,” he holds his face, running his fingers along the sharp lines of his jawbone as he thinks about his idiotic hope that’d you so fastly fall for him as you did with connor. “foolish to think you’d drop him over one night.”
you’re even more confused now, “it was one night, louis.”
“you act like there isn’t the possibility that i’ve known you even before that night, y/n,” he has a smile that comes on his face but it isn’t something genuine. it’s annoyed. “your jerkoff of a boyfriend isn’t as secretive about you as you think.”
“he’s not my boyfriend.”
he scoffs, “you keep saying that.”
“because it’s true.”
“do you know what he says about you?”
“obviously not, louis,” four steps forward, four steps closer. “you keep speaking of ‘labels’ and whatever, but why don’t you just say it. what does he say about me that is so crazy?”
he didn’t expect the sudden brief and assertiveness you pull with your movement and words. it knocks him into a slight revelation as all he can do is stare at you and breathing, memorizing this side of you.
“did he say i was a whore?” that was the only possible thing that you could think of at that moment that could be so bad. “he tell you i was a slut?”
it’s silent. you watch him think and the way he unintentionally avoids your hard stare with the thought process.
“ask him yourself.”
**
“has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes.”
you feel your face burn upon the comment. everything in your body felt as if was about to burst upon the simple company of louis. even though it had to of been hours since connor’s house, and the diner, and even dropping jake off at his own home, you still felt out of your mind in the best way possible. all of your sense were still high, but your vision was fuzzy and you felt lag in your movement.
how were you still high?
“you have,” you felt yourself giggle, to which he smiles with a tip of his head, watching you.
“cute,” his fingers rubbed against his mouth in thought before reaching to you. you felt yourself inhale sharply at his sudden movement and hold your breath once they reached their destination; raking through your hair. “how does he do that to you?”
“what?”
“nothing,” he shook his head, still twisting his fingers through soft strands of your hair. you feel yourself relax, watching him and the way he seemed so focused on just you. “you’re just very pretty, y/n.”
you feel your eyes slightly widen, but his face doesn’t shift at all. he’s calm, while you feel your entire body burst once more into heat. you’re itching to move, you can’t just sit still in that burning warmth beneath his stare. you feel yourself move, leaning forward on your knees so your lips meet louis’.
louis smiles against the pressure of your lips against his--he almost forgets to kiss you back because of it.
almost.
his hands rack up and down the front of your body, lightly pressing into the hold he had around your rib cage, as if willing to crush you beneath his grasp as long as that meant you wouldn’t leave. this contact isn’t enough even for you. you want to feel him all over and the heavy hands holding your body isn’t enough.
you’re on his lap now, one of your hands holding the top of his shoulder while the other claps his cheek. louis feels as if his own body is about to burst beneath you... this is all he has wanted, for a while, and now that he’s got it, he feels it’ll destroy him. you’re ignorant to his feelings, but you feel just as feverish with your heart thump-thumping within your chest, as if speaking to his.
“your mouth tastes like cherry,” your chest is heaving up and down as you pull away, your wide stare boring into his own eyes with something of delirium.
he’s smiling wide, tipping his head back against his seat to see your face better, “so does yours.”
now you smile, “i like you louis.”
he almost groans, rolling his head side to side at the sound of those precious words, “you’re killing me,” he pulls the sentence straight out of his mouth like it was sarcastic, but he meant it, “say it again,” he wanted it.
“i like you,” you repeat, this time his hand is on your cheek. “please kiss me.”
oh, jeez.
he stares, breathless, “okay.”
***
it was a week after your fallout with louis and you couldn’t think about anything other than that. you felt a sudden emptiness and need for something that you barely even had; louis.
every little micro interaction you had with him ran through your mind like a record, over and over till you felt you were going to throw yourself off a cliff. and it wasn’t just the connor comment--which was something you really, really couldn’t stop thinking about--but the seemingly quick liking he had taken to you.
it had caught you off guard, but the more you thought about it, the more curious you became as to the whole thing; which was what led you here; connor’s house, on a friday night where he was once again throwing.
“what have you been saying about me?” you stood in front of him, connor, your vision narrowed as you stared at him, examining him as if his whole existence was strange.
“what?” his confusion was genuine as this question was rather abrupt and you made no attempt to make introductions.
“you know louis partridge?”
connor looks between you and the people he currently stood with, confusion still reeking his features, “yes..?”
“what have you been telling him about me?”
“you want to talk about this somewhere else?”
“i want a straight answer,” you feel his hand wrap around your bicep, pulling you away from his crowd without an answer from you.
“which i can give you if you weren’t so vague... why are you talking to partridge?”
“you got a problem?”
the two of you are stopped in front of a boy; jake.
“no, man, i think we’re good,” connor pays him no mind, side stepping him fast with you still in grip, continuing to interrogate you. you ignore connor, watching jake the whole way you’re being pulled while he watches you. you feel as if the boy isn’t real, like he was someone you had made up when you were high, but there he was, staring just as shocked, but equally skeptical as you were pulled further and further from him.
“are you listening to me, y/n?”
“what?”
“i asked you what you were on about?” you’re now in an empty corner, secluded away from the rest of the party. “haven’t seen you in days and you’re on a tangent about a boy you barely know, what’s going on?”
you finally focus on him, barely processing the words he was putting in your ears, but you didn’t have to in order to hear the fake sympathy and concern.
“how do you know louis?”
he shurgs, “see him every time i throw. gotta get to know my usuals.”
“yeah, and how well have you gotten to know him?”
he shakes his head, feeling attacked, “why?”
“because i think it’s my right to know what you’ve been saying about me to him and whoever else,” the seal of your calmness breaks as you extend an arm out, ready to scold him for anything he was about to say.
his expression drops in return, knowing any attempt to make you calm and make the situation subtle was out of his hands. connor knew you well enough to know you were too far into your frustration to calm you down.
“what’re you talking about?”
but that didn’t mean he had to comply.
“your new choice in men is obviously not working out for you. even they know i’m the best you’ll ever have.”
“what?” your head drops forward, taken aback at the sudden escalation connor had taken to his approach in words. “what the fuck are you on about?”
he smirks, pushing the red solo cup he had up to his lips, glancing around before looking back down to you, “why else do you think he lied to you about whatever it is you’re asking?”
“i can’t believe this,” you pinch the bridge of your nose, “pull yourself out of that goddamn lie before you make yourself look even more like a fool. what have you been saying about me?”
“i find it best you don’t lie about this one, mate. you have an audience of witnesses,” there’s a hand on your back and a voice intervening.
the two of you focus to louis who suddenly stands behind you, daring connor to push it. the boy looks confounded looking between you, louis, and the crowd of boys behind him. he doesn’t know what to do within the corner he had backed himself into.
“whatever, this is my own fucking party. i don’t need to do shit,” he shoves past all of you. you all watch him storm away, not looking back, leaving you all to yourselves in the dust.
“let’s talk,” louis says immediately the moment you look up to him, nodding off in a random direction.
you slowly nod, following him.
“i didn’t think you’d actually ask him.”
a laugh gets caught in the back of your throat, shaking your head at the ignorance as he opens the passenger door to his car for you, “yeah?”
“yeah,” he slides into his own side of the car. “but then again, what would i know about you?”
“a lot, apparently. more than i would guess,” you lean your head against the palm of your hand, staring at him carefully. “you gonna tell me what he said now?”
louis looks hesitant, not even looking at you anymore as he thinks on how to answer. he doesn’t want to answer, it’s that simple, but he owes it to you to give you something sense he was the one who told you in the first place.
“when i met connor, he talked about you a lot. a lot for someone i barely saw. it was like every party he had something new to say or nothing new at all. as long as it was you he was talking about,” he smiles to himself, thinking of all the bragging and praising he had put into you, all for connor to just... “you were like a prize to him, y/n--until you weren’t. he called you easy, but you were his. he said he could walk you like a dog because he was the only guy you thought of.”
you feel rage and annoyance fume in the base of your chest as he speaks. he can see it form in your eyes, take over any look of calmness or subtlety from before. you make a move to push yourself back and out the door but louis is quick to grab your arm, pulling you right back to him, only closer.
“hold on there, cowgirl,” your almost in his lap. “you’re better than that.”
“am i?” you’re squirming, almost pulling from the grasp his grasp if it weren’t for how warm he made you feel.
“yeah,” he’s smiling at you. “why waste any more of your time with him anyways when you could just be here with me?”
you couldn’t help but fall victim to the pulling sensation on your lips to smile at him. you feel that fuzzy feeling creep up into your stomach at his stare like the first time you were both alone in his car and suddenly all your anger at connor melts away.
“only if you offer me cherry pie.”
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''I love her with such passion. Every day is agony without her. I know now it is possible to die from a broken heart. Because when you love someone as much as we love each other, they become fundamental to your existence. So I will die soon, even if I don't kill myself. I guess you could say that I'm pining for her. I could live without food or water longer than I'm going to survive without Nancy." -Sid Vicious
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