That's Hilarious - Tumblr Posts
I'm gonna cry what the fu-
I think Logan's the only kid I'm gonna keep coming back to just bc I strongly believe he's Maverick's son
Hey chat, I'm fueling the logan hate by saying he was birthed by maverick
wait
no hold on ☠️
HIS FATHER IS MAVERICK, NOT BIRTHED
Therefore, Logan is evil bc his father is evil
he'll betray the gang by accidnet
lore
idk
also his mother is in the pahtnom dimension
.
all my theories are soo connected
Jedi Padawans have the classic sitcom bag-of-flour baby assignment to ensure they're prepared to look after young ones in emergency situations
this assessment is not one of the many canceled or postponed during the war
which means that when Ahsoka is abruptly deployed dirtside along with her Master, Grandmaster, and the 501st, she had to scramble to find an appropriate babysitter for her sack of flour
desperate, she tossed it to Commander Cody, who was staying aboard the Negotiator to oversee the campaign, with only a frantic list of the required steps to take care of it while she was gone
when she returns several days later, Cody has painted the sack 212th gold and constructed a sling to carry it around on his front while he keeps his hands free for work
judging by the rank pins attached to the front, the sack of flour is now a lieutenant
once Obi-Wan's heart eyes abate enough, though, it becomes clear to him that Cody and the 212th troopers have not understood that the sack of flour is not, in fact, a literal Jedi tubie
and none of the Jedi or their siblings in the 501st have the heart to correct them, so they let them keep the thing, stomping on the feet of anyone who tries to ask too many questions about their new mascot
once the war ends, Obi-Wan discreetly replaces the sack with a Jedi chrecheling in the middle of the night, having resigned himself to raising another too-young-Padawan
Reva, for her part, is all to happy to gleefully coat herself in flour for the occasion
Hey is anybody having trouble with those Captcha test things lately? Mine are getting kinda weird and I’m even not too sure what to click on
(peering at couple through a slit in the wall) so which one of you is the wave and which is the particle
Somebody translated the infernal runes face tattoo that you can put on your character and the runes on the forhead literally just spell "forhead", the runes on the nose spell "nose" and the runes on the chin say "chin"
Apologies for posting about something related to politics but the stark difference between current American politics and current UK politics is absolutely hilarious and I need more people to talk about it
Cause in America you have a country divided over two men who are pretty much on Death's doorstep, who fight like children and have less cognitive abilities than a bicycle and nobody can tell who's gonna fuck up the country less.
Meanwhile, all the way in the UK you have the Prime Minister and a politician (I think) absolutely pissed over a lanky Scottish actor telling them not to be transphobic and then getting his nails painted pink by his daughter and taking her to see Mean Girls
Duality in it's finest
Pahahaha I’m dying 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Credit: @mannymontaposts
Dare I say it isn't far enough.
Capcom, you’ve gone too far….
he's just concerned for your safety
portable boyfriend, part two!
at some point, charles made a lil ghost costume for orbwin out of a spare napkin or smth he grabbed on a whim, and he maintains that it's one of the best things he's ever made
so here is my lil drawing of it. if any artists wanna draw it, tag me so i can marvel at it pls and ty <3
The Case of the Missing Spyglass Ep 1x04: The Case of the Lighthouse Leapers Charles can't find the spyglass he'd been using before...
Ep 1x06 The Case of the Creeping Forest Now just where do we see it next? XD
JUST SAW A FED-EX DRIVER JUMP OUR OF HIS TRUCK AT A REDLIGHT AND RUN UP TO A SECOND FED-EX TRUCK (THREE CARS AHEAD) AND THE GUY LEANED OUT AND THEY JUST KISSED ON THE LIPS? HELLO?
I was walking out of the Walmart today, and a car passed me, and I got this incredibly vivid impression. It wasn't really in words, but if I had to put it into words, the two key points would be
a). I needed to watch that car and
b). That I needed to be careful, because the driver of the car was a massive bitch.
It kind of took me by surprise, because I really had no reason to be beefing with that car, and I also hadn't really had an impression like that since I was religious, which was in my teen years. Right? It'd been a decade since I had a little voice whisper in my ear, and I'd basically written it off as nonsense.
Anyway, I watched the car, because The Spirits or whatever were very insistent that I did. Car drove fine, went into the parking spot, inched forward, and right when it should've just stopped, the driver gunned it for some reason and it ran into the curb and cracked its bumper.
So, the driver got out, and she went to the front of the car to check that yes, she had cracked her bumper, and then she turned to look at me. The parking lot wasn't empty, but we were the only two people standing in that row, and I'd probably been staring at her for tenish seconds now.
She demanded very angrily to know why I hadn't warned her of the curb. And I could have said I didn't know you were about to gun it or is it my job to help every stranger park, or even could you have even heard me, inside your car?
And all of those would have been fine, but I was really, really busy digesting that I had somehow communed with Mormon Jesus again for the first time in fifteen years, and that the communion had mostly been there to let me watch someone park badly (?), so what I responded with was:
"Because it was foretold."
And I can't tell which would be funnier, if she went silent because there's not much to be said to that, or if she went silent because in Utah, she might actually believe me, but we parted ways without more words.
I'm still kind of digesting this myself, actually.
How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces? These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place. ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! _______________________________ ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth? WITNESS: July 18th. ATTORNEY: What year? WITNESS: Every year. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you? WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which. ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you? WITNESS: Forty-five years. _________________________________ ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget.. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ____________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ. ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you shitting me? _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Getting laid ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: She had three children , right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death.. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Take a guess. ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral… _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question? ______________________________________ And last: ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No.. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
1. Yes they have to fight, 2. Tell me who’s fighting who in the tags! (I’ll add the most ridiculous combos in a reblog)
Really like the silhouettes on these characters. I think they’re pretty distinct!
rewatched Last of the Time Lords
Phil: [Leaning into his mic] Bad gave Richas and Pepito NUKES?
Lullah: idk o-o i didnt get full context of this
Phil: Well if it wasn't the French, then there's only one other person who has access to nuclear material, and that's Bad.
Lullah: just that tio bad wants cucas attention
Phil: Ah, it's always over a boy! Fckin' Cucurucho made him give nukes to kids. Nah, this is- this is fcked. [Laughs]