I Think I-

I think I-

I think I-

No,

I can’t say how I feel.

It will hurt more if I do.

My heart races every time I think of you.

My face lights up whenever I see you.

Tangled up in the sheets.

I feel content.

Your arms wrapped around me

I feel safe.

I think I-

You make me feel light.

As if I don’t have any worry or fear.

Like I was never hurt in the past.

Like I had never had my heart broken.

“I really, really like you.”

You said.

“I really, really like you too.”

I said

And I meant it.

Except, I didn’t realize

I think I-

How much I was going to like you.

Now we’ve drifted apart.

I’m left alone with my feelings.

I wish I could tell you how I feel

I think I-

I’m afraid to say the words.

Afraid of what will happen if I do.

I think I-

But I feel so suffocated holding it in.

I think I-

I must hide how I feel.

I think I-

It’s getting harder to hold it in.

I don’t want to slip up and say it.

I think I-

I can’t.

If I admit it

Then it will hurt more.

Won’t it?

I think I-

I think-

I-

I think I’ve been falling in love with you.

Drift

Drifting

That’s what we are doing.

Drifting apart.

It hurts me knowing that.

Our long conversations

Are slowly getting shorter and shorter.

Now they’re one-word responses.

Or no response at all.

I never thought this would happen.

I held on.

I thought you said there was hope for us.

But now you’re letting go.

My heart hurts

Knowing that you’re moving on.

That I must not cross your mind like it used to.

My mind is racing.

Was it something?

Was it something I did?

Is it my fault?

Why did we have to drift apart?

Blackout

One shot

One hit

Alcohol burning my throat

Marijuana filling my lungs

My problems are fading away

Marijuana smoke fills the air

The buzz in my head grows stronger

My body and mind slowly loosen up

Two more shots

One more hit

My head is now spinning

All worries and cares

Are thrown to the wind

Drunk dialing

And

Drunken words are being spilled

Two more shots

Two more hits

Everything goes black

I don’t know what I’m doing

I feel so numb

Slipping in and out of reality

I feel no more pain

I feel empty

I am a hollow shell

Grateful

I tend to forget.

I should be grateful.

For those, I have met.

Each person taught me a lesson.

Good and bad.

One taught me to how to love,

As well as heartbreak.

A friend taught me bitterness,

As well as forgiveness.

Another taught me comfort,

As well as trust.

One friend taught me how to let go,

And have fun.

Another friend gave me comfort

When I needed it.

I’m so grateful for everyone I met.

I don’t say it enough.

They all taught me to be happy.

Even on my bad days.

Take me to a place where my heart doesn’t hurt so much.

(via melindacarolinee)

Logging into Tumblr on October 1st and seeing everyone like: