Angel Season - Jeong Yunho

Angel Season - Jeong Yunho

Synopsis: Yunho first noticed you when you moved into the building. He was attracted not just by your physical beauty but the way your smile outshined the sun. He has spent the past year making little conversation, trying to be a good neighbor. However, he refused to go into the new year without making a move.

Pairing: neighbor!Jeong Yunho x reader

Genre: strangers to lovers, next door neighbors/cute boy next door, angst - heartache, jealousy

Contains: mentions alcohol consumption

Word Count: 8.9k

December 30, 2022

"Miss, what floor are you on?" "Third floor, apartment 3A," you called out.

The mover nodded his head before whistling for the other. "3A boys!"

One was lifting your bed out of the back of the moving truck, another person still in the truck for support. You stood on the curb of the sidewalk, watching. You were able to help with the smaller boxes, the ones filled with either trinkets or kitchen items. But for the longer furniture, you were more than happy to let the professionals handle it.

As people were carrying things into your new home, you took a moment to look around your surroundings. You've always been attracted to city living. For some people, you knew that they could get overwhelmed by the high-rises and busy streets. That was what attracted you to living here. You liked the idea that you could go about your day without being noticed, being able to blend into the crowds. Yet, you liked the endless possibilities of making this city whatever you want it to be.

Despite the rainy, chilly weather, there was no place you'd rather be.

Seeing as all your furniture had been taken out of the moving truck, you decided to lend a hand now. The faster the movers could drop off your stuff, the sooner you could start unpacking and decorating.

You stepped Ito the truck, going to retrieve one of the boxes you knew you could manage. "Do you need some help there?"

Caught off guard, you jumped at the sound of the new voice. You turned around to see who was talking to you. Much to your surprise, you were greeted by a tall, young man. He couldn't have been older than you.

Wow, he's absolutely stunning.

He wore a gentle smile, feeling a bit bad for giving you a scare. He stood with his hands in his pockets as he stood at the bottom of the truck. You felt a bit guilty at first contemplating taking up his offer. What if he had somewhere to be? What if he was just trying to be nice? However, you came to your senses because he wouldn't have offered if he was serious, right?

"If you don't mind!"

The young man nodded his hand, extending his arms out to take the box from you. You grinned at the gesture, quickly grabbing the box for him. "You have no idea how much this means to me. Lucky for you, the movers got all the heavy stuff, so we just have a few more boxes," you laughed. You quickly grabbed a box for yourself before joining him out of the truck and on the ground. "Hey, I am pretty strong," he said, pretending to be offended. "By the way, my name is Yunho." "I'm y/n. I should've asked before leading you up to my apartment."

You both shared a laugh. Carrying one of the boxes, you took the lead in showing the man to your new apartment. Your mother always told you not to talk to strangers, but there was no way you'd let this handsome stranger just walk past you. Not when he approached you first. "Wait, you're moving here?" He asked, shocked. "Oh no. Please don't tell me there is something wrong with the apartment," you whined. He quickly shook his head, wanting to ease any worries or concerns you may have. Yunho never thought that offering assistance, trying to be a good person would lead him to probably the best thing to happen to him all year.

Yunho was out on his usual routine on a Saturday morning. He went out for his usual coffee and bagel after running errands. It was a little reward for him for getting out of bed rather than staying in. The bigger reward was running into you. "No, I actually live here," he chuckled softly. Yunho was glad that you were in front of him, back turned as you guided him up the steps to your new unit. Because if you turned around, you would see him with the widest grin on his face. He was like a little boy on Christmas morning who opened up the one present he has been asking for all year. "Small world!" You giggled. "What unit are you?" "3B, what about you?" "Well hi neighbor," you teased. "I'm moving into 3A."

Correction, this was now the best present he could have received.

Valentine's Day - February 2023

Over the past month or so, Yunho and you have passed by each other. Sometimes it is when you are entering the building and he's leaving, which he'll open the door for you. Or sometimes it is when you are both returning after a night out.

He was starting to pick up on things that consisted in your daily life. For example, he knew that you liked a fresh bouquet of flowers for your apartment every 2 or 3 weeks. You always had one bad of groceries, presumably buying just for the week. Friday nights always included a bottle of red wine.

All of his friends were aware of the girl next door. They often tried to catch a glimpse of you when they were over to visit. Yunho certainly has developed a crush on the girl next door. How couldn't he? You radiated brighter than the lights atop the Empire State Building.

Tonight was Valentine's Day. Both of your respective jobs kept you out of the apartment most nights. You two had exchanged numbers, for the sake of knowing someone else in the building and for emergencies. Yunho hadn't brought himself to text you outside of those conditions as he was afraid of giving the wrong impression. He didn't even crack under the relentless teasing of his friends on his failure to make a move after a month and a half of knowing you.

He felt a stronger urge to text you today. Did she have a date for Valentine's Day? Did she even want one? Was she even single?

Yunho was on the unlucky side of not having a date for the evening. His work had consumed the better part of days, so he hadn't put much of his energy towards dating. He often came home, reheated dinner if he hadn't ordered takeout, and slept before doing it all again the next day.

Trudging up the steps, he was contemplating if tonight would be the night he finally texts you. However, he knew texting you was pointless. Not when you were practically standing in front of him.

His eyes widened, taking you in. You wore a black peacoat with the red dress you were wearing peaking out underneath. Silver heels were hugging your feet. He has never seen your hair done in curls, but it was becoming one of his favorite looks on you. You wore red lipstick to go with the dress. The one accessory he wasn't pleased to see was your hands gripping the plastic loops of a white takeout bag. Oh no, she did have a date tonight. Fuck, I missed my opportunity.

Seeing movement from your peripheral, you turned your head over. The light frown on your lips was soon replaced with a gentle smile. Yunho always brought joy into your life, even if the interactions were minimal. "Hi Yunho," you spoke, your voice softer than usual. It didn't carry its usual tone of happiness. He could tell that there was something wrong. He felt the urge to take care of anything that might be troubling you, but he didn't want to overstep his bounds. "Hey y/n. I'm surprised you're not out tonight. No suitors catch your attention?" You smiled wider at his compliment. Yunho always knew how to make you feel special. Any girl would be lucky to have him as their boyfriend. "Unfortunately no. I, uh, got stood up, so ended up picking up Chinese from the place around the corner on my way back." This time, Yunho frowned. You got stood up? How could anyone do that to anyone, but especially how could anyone do that to you? You were literal treasure in Yunho's eyes. He felt saddened for you, but angry at whoever made you upset.t

"Oh, y/n. I'm sorry to hear that. Are you ok? Is there anything I can do?" "You're too sweet. No, I'll be okay. I think I just want to be alone, if that's ok?"

Of course, whatever you felt like you needed. He nodded his head, offering a gentle smile. "I'll see you around?" He asked. You smiled back, a bit wider. Seeing Yunho was the favorite part of your day.

The two of you entered your respective apartments. Once the door was shut to his, he let out a soft sigh. He slipped off his winter jacket, hanging it by the door before slipping off his shoes. He trudged himself over further into his apartment, turning on the floor lamp in the living room. He claimed his seat on the couch before looking out the windows into the city.

His earlier dilemma seemed to resolve himself. Sitting up slightly, he pulled his phone out of his pocket. His fingers made quick work at typing a text. A very important text to you.

"He's a loser, y/n. You deserve the whole world and I know there's someone out there ready to give it to you 🙂"

He set his phone on the arm of the chair. He wasn't sure if you would respond, or even read his text tonight. It tore him up inside knowing some jerk made you upset. He also felt some responsibility. Maybe if he had gotten the courage to confess to you, he could have saved you from the disappointment? I mean, he couldn't even dream of letting you down by any means.

Yunho was surprised to feel the vibration of his phone. He never acted so quickly to pick something up before. "You're the sweetest in the whole world. Thanks Yunho 🩷 to hell with him I guess"

He chuckled at your words before trying a response back. "To hell with him. You are an angel, don't settle for less."

Little did he know how wide you were smiling next door. You were at your kitchen countertop. The tears of frustration quickly forgotten the moment Yunho texted you. It was as if he answered your silent prayer.

April 2023

It was a rainy day in the city. Spring was in full swing, the green buds on the trees in the neighborhood beginning to peanut. People all around the city were beginning to put plants out on their balconies. You always loved rainy days. They always soothed your soul, loving to just curl up and watch rain run down the window.

"I can't believe they cancelled the game," Yunho sighed from outside the hallway. You've learned that he can be loud when he's excited or frustrated. This seems like it is the latter.

There were no other voices on the side of the door. He was probably on the phone. Maybe with Yeosang? You've met his friends here and there as they float in and out of his apartment. There were all friendly towards you. It was just a bigger testament to who Yunho is as a person.

You didn't hear much of the conversation before the door closed. Maybe this was your chance. You planned on having a lazy day anyways. Maybe read a book, watch a movie, but you know that it is always better with company.

Taking your phone from beside you, you unlocked it with ease. Your fingers eagerly typing a text message to the boy next door. Your speed of texting matched the butterflies fluttering in your stomach.

"Hey neighbor! Think I just heard you get home, wanna come over to watch a movie?"

Your heart was pounding both with excitement and anxiety. You weren't typically the person to make the first move. Since moving in, you were very grateful for your friendship with Yunho. He's treated you with nothing but kindness, really setting a standard on how your guy friends and even dates should be treating you.

At night, your mind often got curious about the topic. What would it be like to be with Yunho? Not once have you seen a woman enter his apartment. He never even mentioned going on dates. There potential was there, but you just weren't sure if he was just being a good friend, an exceptional neighbor, or if he was into you.

"Wow perfect timing, angel" You grinned seeing his nickname for you. "Plans got cancelled, so I'll be over in 5? I'll bring the popcorn!"

Springing up from the couch, you rushed over to your bathroom. You were wearing a pair of shorts and an oversized t-shirt. You were unsatisfied with your hair though. It was curled in a messy bun on the top of your head. You quickly pulled at the scrunchie, releasing your hair so it fell down to your shoulders. You began brushing it out. You didn't have much time.

This could solve every answer you've had over the past few weeks. This could easily just be two friends hanging out. What if it turned into something more?

Y/n, chill. You took a deep breath, trying to ease your racing mind. You didn't like building up expectations. While you would like it if Yunho made a move or gave some indicator he is attracted to you, you didn't want to set yourself up for disappointment.

Knock knock knock.

Here goes nothing. You took a deep breath in the reflection of your bathroom mirror. It is just two friends hanging out.

You turned off your bathroom light before attending to the front door of your apartment. Your heart beat matched the pace you were walking, trying your hardest not to be too fast. You were conscious maybe he would hear you racing to the door, even thought you were eager to have him over.

Opening the door, you smiled wide to be greeted by Yunho. He was standing on the other side, holding a bowl of freshly popped popcorn. The hallway beginning to smell of the delicious food. "Sorry, it took me so long! I just wanted to make sure I got the popcorn ready."

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The sun was hidden behind grey clouds, providing little light throughout your apartment. You insisted on lighting a few candles, to create a warm feel to your home compared to the cold weather outside. It also helped create a bit of a romantic ambiance to the afternoon.

You two were sat pretty close together on your three-seat grey couch. An emerald blanket was spread across your laps with the bowl of popcorn in between.

After hearing that you have not seen a single Spiderman movie, Yunho was determined to show you all the movies. Or at least the big 3 - Maguire, Garfield, and Holland. He tried insisting the two of you didn't have to watch all three movies today, but you had no other plans. You would be more than happy to spend the afternoon like this with Yunho.

Throughout the movie, you guys would balance light conversation and watching the movie. When you were focused on the film, Yunho would glance at you to see your reaction. He adored Spiderman, so seeing if you liked one of his favorite things captured his attention. He also would focus on how you smiled at certain parts of the film, particular the scenes between Peter Parker and Mary Jane.

When you weren't focusing on the film, you two would talk more. Sure, you've made light conversation when passing, and a bit more meaningful over text, but this was the perfect time to get to know each other. Yunho wanted to know about your dreams, your passions, your dislikes. He wanted to know all the little things that made you who you are.

It was about 5:18pm when you guys started the the first movie with Andrew Garfield. You felt your eyes getting a bit heavy. Yunho took notice, moving the bowl of popcorn out of the way for you. Noticing, you smiled appreciatively to him. He always had your best interests at heart.

Your eyes grew heavy, body sinking more into the couch. Before either of you knew it, your head fell on his shoulder. Without the bowl of popcorn in the way, your body curled into his. Yunho's eyes were wide and heart nearly stopped before speeding up.

Glancing down at you, your chest was resting against his shoulder. You looked adorable. Your eyelashes were resting against your cheeks, lips slightly parted. Your hands were grazing the side of his body. There was no chance of him going anywhere now. Not that he would want to.

Very slowly, cautious as to not wake you up, his arm draped over you. He sunk slightly into the couch before resting his head on yours. Sleep began taking over his body. He was content.

May 2023

"What do you mean you're leaving?" You frowned.

Yunho suggested that the two of you hung out weekly. It started off with going to local bars to vent about the woes of work and life. Those quickly changed into dinner out, to get a change of scenery and explore the neighborhood. Tonight, Yunho suggested dinner at his place. You weren't sure why at first, but obviously excited to spend quality time with your best friend. But now you get why he opted for staying in.

"I'm not leaving forever," Yunho reassured. "I'm just going to Korea for a little bit. It's been a while since I visited my family, and I can finally afford a ticket after my promotion."

Of course, you knew that family was important. If you got the opportunity to visit your family more often, you'd easily say yes. You couldn't help though but feel a bit selfish in wanting Yunho to stay.

"How long am I going to be without seeing you around?" "3 months," he said sheepishly.

Dramatically, you let out a whine and threw your head back. Yunho couldn't help but chuckle at your antics. It made his heart swell seeing as that you were going to miss him.

He moved his hand over to place it gently on yours. The light touch, even though it was feather like, felt like electric shocks throughout your body. You always craved his touch. Ever since that day last month when you woke up to his arms wrapped around you on his couch.

"Angel, it'll go by quick, I promise." "Can you also promise me something?" "Anything." "Promise that you won't have a realization while you're away that you actually want to stay in Korea? Because the thought of you moving and actually having to say goodbye will kill me."

He chuckled again, a wide smile on his lips. "I promise."

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Turns out that all of Yunho's friends were traveling with him to Korea. All of the boys have apparently been speaking about it for months, but the idea was finally leaving the group chat.

Even though you wanted to accompany all the boys to the airport to see them off, you knew that it would be too painful. Even if he was going to be gone for 3 months, it felt like a part of you was leaving as well. At least with saying goodbye at the apartment, you could hurry back to your place and shed tears if you want to.

Going down the steps of the apartment building, you two headed out the front door. Yunho had called an Uber to take him to the airport, not wanting to pay the overnight prices for parking at the airport especially with how long he was going to be.

It felt very reminiscent to the day you two met. You even tried to offer carrying one of Yunho's bags, but he refused to let you help. You rolled your eyes at him. The least you could do was get in front of him to open the front door rather than watch him struggle to do it with a rolling suitcase, a duffle bag, and his backpack. "Thank you, angel," he chuckled. He could sense you were a bit annoyed for not being able to help. He loved the way your nose scrunched up like a bunny when you were annoyed.

He walked towards the edge of the sidewalk, on the lookout for the vehicle. You stood back slightly, smiling up at him. You were trying your best not to let your sadness ruin the moment. He has been excited about traveling home since he bought the ticket. Yunho described all his favorite places in Seoul, all the things he missed.

"You better still talk to me while you're in Seoul," you said teasingly.

With his bags on the concrete, he turned towards you. He wore that wide smile of his, that wide smile that caused your knees to get week. He opened his arms, inviting you into them. No way were you going to object.

Walking into his arms, he wrapped them around you. He pulled you in close to him by your waist. His lips pressed against your forehead, causing your eyes to flutter shut at the sensation. How am I going to survive 3 months without him?

"I'll talk to you as much as I can, take all the photos I can," he promised.

Satisfied with that answer, you nodded your head. Your arms had found a place around his torso, holding yourself go. Maybe if you held onto each other long enough, he would want to stay. If only.

You felt two taps on your lower back. Raising an eyebrow, you pulled back to lookout Yunho. He was already looking at you. It was as if time froze. He towered over you, but his face was so close to you. His eyes never leaving yours. You could melt into a puddle due to his gaze.

Keeping one hand around you, his other hand moved to cup your face. He tilted your head slightly to the side. His fingertips rested against your cheek. The whole time, he wore a smile on his lips. Regardless of what he had up his sleeves, you put your whole trust in him. You never doubted his intentions with you.

A shiver ran down your spine feeling the padding of his thumb run across your lower lip. Was this actually happening? He glanced at your lips before looking into your eyes. Yunho was looking for any hesitation from you, any sign that he should stop before getting to ahead of himself. Yet, you never looked away.

"Wait for me?"

You couldn't bring yourself to speak. You were frozen in place. Your mind had become fuzzy, all the sounds of the busy city around you faded. All that mattered was the man standing in front of you, the man who seemed to be saying everything you've been yearning to hear since you two met. Was this actually happening? Somehow, you got yourself to nod.

Yunho smiled wider before letting his desires take over. Not wanting to waste anymore time, he pressed his lips against yours.

HONK!

The kiss was rudely short after hearing the sound of a car horn. You two pulled away, both confused and upset at the interruption. Yunho looked over his shoulders before gasping softly. There was his Uber to whisk him away from you. "Shit," he sighed.

Looking back at you, he smiled apologetically. You smiled back before leaning up on his tiptoes. Sensing that Yunho was actually going to leave, the Uber driver got out of the car to grab Yunho's suitcases and place them in the trunk. Just enough time to do one last thing.

"Don't worry. I'll save all the kisses for you, I promise to wait for you."

You leaned up to press one last lingering kiss on his lips. One last kiss for now at least.

June 2023

Since Yunho left, you got pretty good at figuring out timezone differences.

You didn't want to interfere with Yunho's daily life. You were sure that he has plans to visit family, local places he hasn't been able to go to in years, and make meaningful memories with his best friends and loved ones. Yet, Yunho was insistent he will make time for you.

Every Wednesday night and Sunday morning, you two would FaceTime. Thank God for modern technology. "I wish you could be here," Yunho admitted one night.

You frowned and nodded. Ever since Yunho left, he was all you think about. You tried getting yourself involved more in your work, but it as summer. Work was a bit slow. You had friends in the city who tried to help you out of your conundrum, taking you out on the weekends. But you still thought about him, wanting to experience summer in the city with him.

It made you sick to your stomach when you saw couples in the park. You often thought about the kiss you two shared on the morning he left. You wondered where you guys would be, romantically, if he had stayed. You could easily envision dates in the park, nights out with friends, and everything in between. You were anxiously waiting for his return to know where things could go. "Y/n?"

You blinked a couple of times as he called out to you. A soft blush coated your cheeks, coming to realize you haven't spoken in a few minutes. "Sorry, Yunho. Just thinking about what it would be like when you get back here," you explained.

He seemed to smile at your response. It was good to know you missed him as much as he missed you. Though, if it was a competition, he could say that he missed you more. "Oh angel, I know. Just two more months, right?"

All you could do is nod, trying your best to smile along with him. He looked good, even with the low quality of FaceTime with a poor wifi connection. He glowed from being out in the sun, probably glowing also with happiness by being back at home. "I know what will make us feel better," he suddenly announced. You perked up with curiosity. Yunho always had some trick up his sleeve. That was what you loved about him. He always kept you on your toes, never settling for a routine. "Go check the front door."

"You better not be pulling a prank on me, Jeong Yunho!" "After you called me by my full name? Absolutely not."

You rolled your eyes playfully before pushing yourself away from the desk in your bedroom. Yunho watched with amusement as you disappeared from the frame. Following his request, you made your way to the front door of your apartment. What did he do?

There was no knock at the door to indicate someone was there. However, you trusted Yunho. You slowly opened the door, confirming there was nobody standing behind there. Instead, there was a bouquet of flowers on your doormat. You gasped softly to see it wa a rather large bouquet, much larger than the ones you pick up from Trader Joe's.

You bent over to take the glass vase into two hands. There was a yellow bow wrapped around it. You also noticed that there was a card sticking in between the flowers. With one arm securing the vase, you flipped the card over.

"Happy birthday, my angel. Hopefully these make up for me being away."

Your heart fluttered at the sentiment. How did you get so fortunate? Wanting to hurry back to Yunho, you returned to the inside of your apartment. Both of your hands held the vase, so you closed the door with your foot. You began to make your way back to your bedroom where he awaited for you.

"Yunho, I love-" but you froze. Instead of his face on the monitor, you were met with your laptop background. You frowned a bit, assuming that maybe the connection got disrupted.

He'll call you back. He always did when this happened.

For now, you walked over to your windowsill. You placed the vase there, so it could get the necessary sunlight. He knew just the ways to make you smile, even when he is thousands of miles away. You pulled your phone out to snap a photo of it, with the card showing.

August 2023

The conversations between you and Yunho began to become less frequent. It chipped away at your heart when you would go days, sometime a week without hearing from him. Yet, his friends reassured you that he was having a great time back at home.

All of Yunho's friends easily became yours, despite them being on the other side of the world. You then decided to throw a welcome back party for all the boys. You had your own friends enlisted to help with decorations - there were balloons, streamers, and even a cake. You were excited to have some of your favorite people back. But not more excited than you were to have Yunho back.

It was 7:40pm when the boys began to come to the party. Seonghwa and Hongjoong were the first to arrive. Your friends started to trickle in one at a time. After a whole summer without Yunho, you wanted to have a room full of positive energy. San, Yeosang, and Wooyoung arrived next. Then quickly came Jongho.

Each time the door opened, you looked over, hoping to see the man of the hour. Yet, you felt your smile flatten when it wasn't Yunho.

Your friends all giggled at your reactions. They were quick to reassure you that he was on his way. While Yunho's friends all were quick to take your mind off of Yunho's absence.

Mingi was the second to last person to arrive. Mingi was the first person in the friend group to meet. He's known Yunho the longest, so meeting him felt like you were meeting the president. While you and Yunho remained in undefined territory, you wanted to make a great impression. "Y/n!" "Mingi!"

You two approached each other, wrapping each other in a hug. You laughed as Mingi began rocking you back and forth. He definitely became like a big brother to you, often using your drastic height difference as a great point for laughter. "What's up, short stuff?" "Nothing much, Mingi. How's the weather up there?"

Before he could respond, there was knocking at the door. Your heart skipped a beat. Yunho. Mingi glanced at the door before looking at you. His hands were placed on your forearms, keeping you still rather than running towards the door like you wanted to rush to the door. "Wait, y/n. There's something I need to tell you." "Mingi, come on. Can't it wait?" Your best friend beat you from going to open the door. Your attention on Mingi was lost before you quickly looked over at the door.

You could feel your stomach drop at what was revealed behind the closed front door. There was Yunho. With a girl by his side. Her hand was on his chest which made you physically ill. Yunho was smiling from ear to ear, saying hello to his friends until his eyes landed on you. That's when your smile faded. He looked as if he was about to say something to you but you quickly looked away.

This can't be happening.

"I need to get out of here," you murmured. Getting the hint, Mingi stepped aside, blocking Yunho's view of you. Your eyes looked around your room until you eyed the fire escape by your kitchen window.

With your eyes on the target, you maneuvered yourself through the crowd to the fire escape. The majority of people at the party were in your living room, enjoying the food you laid out and making conversations amongst themselves. You just needed a chance to breathe before returning inside.

You propped open the window, slipping out to climb the steps. You at least climbed until you were out of sight from inside the room. Your eyes were burning slightly, your emotions catching up to you.

"Mingi, where is she?" "Where is who?"

You heard Yunho groan before there was more shuffling of footsteps throughout your apartment. You should have closed the window behind you, but it was too late. You put your hands on your forehead, trying your best to stop crying before the inevitable happened. It didn't take long anyways. "There you are," Yunho sighed. Fuck me for having a tiny apartment. You didn't pick your head up to hear Yunho climb out to join you. "What? You're not going to even look at me?"

Who does he think he is? "You made me promise," you murmured. "Y/n, angel, you gotta at least speak up."

You felt your blood begin to boil now. He doesn't get the right to call you that anymore. Not when he broke your heart. You did pick your head up, your jaw clenched. You stared at him.

He leaned against the iron railing of the fire escape. He looked guilty. He knows what he did. "You made me promise to wait for you. And I held up my end of the bargain." "Angel, I know-" "Don't you dare fucking call me that."

Yunho's eyes opened wide. He has never heard you shout before. Let alone he never thought you would shout at him. He was at a lost for words. "Is that why you stopped our FaceTime calls?"

You watched as he sighed, dropping his head. Your heart dropping and shattering along with him. "Get out." Y/n, please. Let me explain what happened." "I said get out, Yunho!"

Mingi quickly appeared at the sound of you screaming. You didn't even notice that there was a small watch party watching you experience heartbreak from the kitchen. "Come on, mate. Take Ara with you." Yunho glanced between the two of you, even more thrown off as to why Mingi was coming to your defense.

However, Yunho didn't want to make matters worse. He didn't want to further upset you in your own home, but the damage was done. You turned your face to focus on the skyline, not wanting to watch Yunho walk into the art of someone else.

When you noticed Yunho was gone, you groaned loudly before resting your head back in your hands. What were you going to do?

October 2023

You haven't spoken to Yunho in weeks. You constantly had music playing from the speakers in your living room or walked around your apartment with headphones to avoid hearing any and all interactions between Yunho and his girlfriend. You even were contemplating on moving to a new place in the new year, but your financial situation limited you on where you could go.

Since things went radio silent, your conversations with the other boys have also gone quiet. It pained you to lose them as friends, but you couldn't bring yourself to reach out there. Not when Yunho might be brought up.

At the moment, you were reading a book on your couch. You had the music playing in the background as you had connected your iPhone to your wireless speaker, drowning out any noise. At least someone gets a happily every after in the novel. You had a glass of red wine on the coffee table, getting lost in the pages.

You were about to flip the page to your book when the music cut out. Your eyes widened as you feared the worst. No no no. You couldn't afford your phone dying. You were sure you put it on the charger. There was no room for mishaps like this.

However, it wasn't the worst case you imagined. It might have been something worst, definitely unexpected to say the least. You weren't sure how to feel seeing the name flash on your phone screen.

Mingi.

Slowly, you reached over to pick up the phone. You stared at it for the time being. What could he want? Mingi was the last person you thought would reach out to you. Wasn't there a rule under bro code that said not to take your friend's exes, if you could even call yourself that? You weren't sure what you even were to Yunho.

Mingi's name vanished from your phone screen, the music restarting. You let out a sigh, about to sink into your couch to ease your racing heart when he started calling again.

It had to be serious if he was calling you twice. Hesitantly, your thumb hit the green accept button. You held the phone up to your ear.

"Hello? Mingi?" "Long time since I've heard from you," he said cheerfully. "Mind coming to open the door for me?"

What? You glanced the door before standing up. You walked over to the door slowly. Once you were at the peephole of your unit door. There he was, standing as he looked around the hallway with his hand up to his ear, holding the phone.

Slowly, you opened the door and gazed up at Mingi. He noticed the movement and finally looked ahead of him. His smile grew when he saw you for the first time in months. "Hi, y/n," he spoke softly. You could hear his voice from right in front of you and from the speaker. "Hi Mingi. What can I do for you?" You said, unhanging up the phone to address him properly.

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For the first time in weeks, you felt genuinely happy. You arm was linked with Mingi's as he guided you to your apartment unit.

While it's been weeks since contact with him, it felt like you guys were picking up right where you left off. Maybe that is why it was so easy to say yes to Mingi when he asked you out for dinner. There was also a special connection between you and Mingi. From the moment you met, the communication between you two has been strong.

Tonight, you got to explore that on a deeper level. Mingi waited patiently in your living room as you got ready. He took you to a restaurant around the corner, which was a bit more upscale than what you were anticipating. You put on a black body con dress, wearing a light leather jacket to go with it.

Mingi looked at you as if you were made our of the stars. You looked enchanting. And since the fallout, you felt just as amazing.

Being the absolute gentleman he is, Mingi walked you to your front door not just of your apartment building but to your unit. Part of you was contemplating about inviting him inside for a nigh cap, but you really appreciated where things were between the two of you. It felt like Mingi just walked back into your life, and you didn't want to risk losing him again. "Mingi, I cannot thank you enough for this evening," you smiled.

He looked over at you as he led you up the staircase. "It really was long overdue, sweet girl. I've been meaning to do this for a while, but I didn't want to overstep," he confessed. You felt your cheeks get hot at his confessional, looking down as you watched your feet move up the steps. Mingi laughed lightly in response, leaning over to kiss your cheek.

You two soon arrived at your front door. Biting your lip gently, you stood in front of him yet you couldn't bring yourself to detach yourself from him. And deep down, Mingi didn't want you to eat go either.

"So, I gotta ask," you began. "What was this? I mean, was this two friends getting reacquainted with each other or..?" "Or something more?"

Mingi wrapped one arm around you, pulling you in closer. You blushed even harder, a hand going to rest on his chest. Your heart was pounding even after. You were convinced that Mingi could feel it. He opened his mouth to speak but froze when he saw movement behind you. You raised an eyebrow and dared to look over your shoulder, wanting to see what stole your date's attention.

You felt your throat suddenly get dry.

There was Yunho. He was holding a bag of groceries, standing at the top of the steps that led to your respective units. He was staring at the two of you, eyes flickering back and forth. There was no way he just caught his best friend and his old crush together? It was the way you were dressed up for Mingi that rubbed Yunho the wrong way. Was this a date?

Mingi didn't say anything to Yunho. He quickly looked back down at you, offering a gentle smile. His hand on your lower back moved to your hip, squeezing it reassuringly. "How about I'll give you a call when I get home?" He whispered.

You simply nodded. You weren't sure how to even respond. Mingi kept a smile, an attempt to ease your worries. He murmured a goodnight before kissing your cheek lingeringly. Your fingertips grazed his body as he maneuvered around you to head home.

You turned around, to watch him leave. There was no Yunho. Did you imagine the whole thing? You stood there for a moment, trying to wrap your mind around what happened.

Yunho, on the other hand, was in his apartment. He stood with his back against the closed front door, staring ahead of himself. He too was trying to wrap his mind around what he just witnessed.

November 2023

The sound of a door slamming caused you to jolt. It shook your walls a bit. "What the hell?" You murmured. You heard the sound of another door, maybe the same, opening again, realizing it was coming from next door. Yunho.

"You haven't even told me you love me in the past 5 months that we've been dating," Ara screamed.

You shouldn't be eavesdropping, you know you really shouldn't. However, the events unfolding peaked your interest. With having blocked out Yunho pretty much from your life, you had no updates on the relationship or anything about him.

"Maybe because I don't! Have you ever thought about that? That maybe I've been trying to find ways to love you or get myself to love you but I can't be in love with you?!"

Your jaw fell open. Not the update you were expecting.

"This is because of y/n, isn't it?" Ara voice spoke, but you could tell it was shaky. She was scared of knowing the truth, and secretly, you were too. "Honestly? Yeah." "She's with Mingi now. You're with me, Yunho. Get over her." "I can't. I don't think I ever will because if I can't date you and forget about her, how can I date anyone?"

Before you know it, you heard the sound of the door slamming. This time, you recognized it to be the front door to Yunho's apartment. You were staring up at your ceiling.

Well, this makes things complicated again.

New Years Day - December 31, 2023

Mingi was hosting a New Years Eve party at his place. You were invited, seeing as you and Mingi had rekindled your friendship.

The two of you went on several dates before releasing that there were no feelings between the two of you. You cared deeply for one another, but were more like siblings than anything else. The attention he was giving you on those dates is something that you'll never forget. You were grateful for him helping you get back and your feet. And he was grateful that you passed along his number to your best friend.

"Hey, I'm going to go find Mingi," your best friend announced as you entered the party. "Trying to ensure you'll get your New Years Eve kiss from your new boyfriend?" You teased. She rolled her eyes playfully before giggling. She couldn't even deny herself as she nodded her head, confirming your suspicions. "Are you going to be okay if I go over for a little bit? I know he might show up.."

He. Yunho. Since you overheard their argument last month, you two haven't spoken. He hasn't texted you to meet up, but to be fair, you also haven't texted him. You weren't sure what to make out of the whole situation. While you think you want Yunho back, you remember the pain he caused.

You weren't even sure if him and Ara actually called it quits! The fight sounded ugly. And you knew if you heard those words from your significant other, you would have walked out as well. Yet, people constantly get back together even after the worst of storms. Looking at your best friend, you smiled reassuringly and nodded. "Yeah, I think I'm going to be okay. Just be quick? He can have you at midnight but you're still my date for the evening," you teased.

She laughed and nodded, thanking you and giving you a quick hug before rushing to locate Mingi. You shook your head playfully before going over towards the kitchen island. If there was a chance you were going to encounter Yunho, might as well boost your confidence. Seeing a bottle of white wine, you smiled. Mingi remembered. Bonus points for being a screw top.

"So you switched from red wine to white?"

It was almost as if the universe needed a laugh, a way to really close out your 2023. Setting the bottle down, you turned on your heels to see Yunho behind you. He smiled sheepishly, that smile that made you weak in the knees. For a while, you wanted to slap him for what he had done to you. But even after all this time, you wanted to melt in front of him.

Glancing at the bottle, you shrugged. "I guess I just wanted to try something new."

He was attractive as ever. It wasn't fair that after all this time, he could look at you with that soft gaze and you crumble. You wanted to make him jealous, make him regret not taking a chance on you. However, you were ready to gravel if given the chance.

His eyes remained on you. To him, you radiated brighter than before. It was as if you were made out of stars. You captivated everyone's attention with ease, but he wanted you all to himself. He wanted to make things more concrete, never making you doubt or worry again.

"So um," he said. "Ara and I broke up."

You frowned getting confirm of the news. Of course, this worked out in your benefit, but you still didn't like to hear the news. Any sort of heartache is tough.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, Yunho. How have you been holding up?" "A lot better than you'd think," he chuckled. "How are things between you and Mingi? Are you guys dating officially now or?"

Your eyes widened slightly. That's right. Last time he saw you, you were about to kiss his best friend after a spontaneous date. You were a bit surprised to hear that Mingi hadn't mentioned anything to him. All you did was motion over to your left side, where Mingi and your best friend were giggling and kissing each other.

Yunho's jaw dropped. You could see his fists clenched but you quickly reached out to rest your hand on his bicep. He relaxed under your touch, gaze softening. He watched them for a moment before it clicked for him that you were touching him. His cheeks reddened, glancing at you before looking down at his feet. "We never got started. I think we were both going on dates because we were missing something," you explained. "Missing something like what?"

He looked at you surprisingly. Yunho's friends always said he was like a golden retriever, but you've never seen it until now. He looked at you like you were holding the golden key to the treasure chest. Literally, you could provide him with the entrance into your world one and for all.

"Missing you," you confessed. "Oh really? How should we fix that?" "Hey, you two, midnight is still 15 minutes away!"

Smack.

The sound of laughter filled the room as eyes went from you and Yunho to Mingi, who just got smacked upside the head by your best friend. It became painfully apparent where you two were. You were standing by all the alcohol at the party, a high traffic area.

"Wanna get out of here?"

You nodded your head, smiling at Yunho. He smiled back at you before grabbing the red wine, the bottle you genuinely liked. To assist, you grabbed two red solo cups. Mingi couldn't trust anyone or himself with glass. With Yunho's free hand, he grabbed your hand and began leading you out of Mingi's unit to the door to the rooftop.

"After you," Yunho gestured, as he pushed open the door with his shoulder.

You smiled appreciatively as you stepped out onto the ledge. A shiver, both from the chilly air of late December to the excitement of New Year's Day. It was always your favorite time of year. Your eyes moved around as you took in the sights of the city from this vantage point.

Yunho made sure you got to the rooftop safely. Setting down the wine bottle for a second, he grabbed one of the bricks to prop the door slightly, not wanting to get the two of you locked out. But boy, would it create a memory for the two of you. Picking up the bottle again, he rejoined you. "This is absolutely beautiful," you stated.

Watching you, he smiled. You wore a smile on your lips as your eyes, he swore, literally sparkled. He wasn't sure if it was from the decorative lights around the city or your pure excitement, but he liked to believe that he had something to do with it. The wind pushed your hair around, revealing your face. "Yeah, the best view," he whispered.

Slowly, he walked up to you. Noticing you were still holding the two solo cups, he took them for you. You watched, thinking he was going to pour a glass for you for midnight as a cheers.

Instead, he stacked the two cups before putting them down on the top of the wine bottle. Maybe he wanted to open the bottle right up at midnight?

Still full of surprises, Yunho took both of your hands in his instead. His thumbs ran over your knuckles. He took a step close to you, closing in on the space that divided you two.

"I think we've spent too much time apart, don't you think, angel?" That nickname. It stirred mixed emotions from you. The last time you heard that nickname, he was smashing your heart into a million pieces that you didn't think could be put back together. Yet, hearing him call you that was like hearing your favorite song from your childhood. He was the only one that called you that. He was the only one who will ever call you that. "I know I fucked up this year. I fucked up so bad," he began. "And I know we have a long road ahead where you could let me into your life again. I don't want to just be the boy next door anymore. I want to be yours. I want to show you that I can take care of your heart, your wellbeing like I should've done this entire time."

No way this was actually happening.

From instead the apartment and around the neighborhood outside, you heard people begin to count down.

10

9

"I can't go back in time and erase what I did."

8

7

"Y/n, I will do whatever it takes to win your trust back. We can take things are you pace," he vowed

6

5

All you could do was smile at Yunho. He was trying to get all the words out that he could. You could see the panic in his eyes that he might end up saying the wrong thing. He was too adorable

4

3

You took a step into him, dropping your hands so they were at your sides. Still holding his hand. Your fingers slipped in between his, which cut him off from speak. Your heart was racing as you gazed up into his eyes. Both of our faces moving towards each other.

2

You decided to step up on your tiptoes. He smirked lightly, always loving how much shorter you were than him.

1

A chorus of "Happy New Year!" echoed from inside the house. You could hear it from other people who gathered on their rooftops and from the street below. Fireworks went off around you, signaling the start of 2024.

"Happy New Year, Yunho," you whispered. Without wasting anymore time, you tilted your head up to fully press your lips against his. His hands left yours to hold onto your hips, keeping you stable. You weren't the type of person from traditions, but this was one you couldn't pass by.

You always learned from your past and took those life lessons into the new year. And it seemed like Yunho was ready to do the same.

He squeezed your hips affectionately, smiling against your lips. You couldn't fight off the smile on your lips as well. His lips chased after yours slowly, wanting to savor this moment but also to show you through his actions that his words carried weight with them. He wanted you to know everything was genuine.

2024 was a new year, a new chapter for you and Jeong Yunho.

I'd Wait For You - Joshua Hong

Synopsis: Joshua was your best friend, the person who has witnessed you grow and blossom. That includes being front row to watching you fall in and out of love with people. Joshua was convinced he could treat you better. Could you find yourself to let him in?

Pairing: non-idol! Joshua Hong x fem reader

Genre: Angst, childhood friends to lovers, fluff here and there!

Word Count: 2.3k

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When Joshua thought of the person he was, it was because of you. You were the one who helped him pick out clothes so he found his style, you were the one who boosted his confidence he he doubted himself and pushed him to try new things, and you were the one who helped him made bad decisions sometimes in the hopes of making long-lasting memories. You were his person.

It was written by the universe that the two of you would be best friends. With your mothers being so close, there is no denying that you two will always have an important place in each other's lives.

Ever since you were younger, you two didn't go somewhere without the other. You attended the same schools, even the same college. Sure, college led you two to different friend groups, different activities, and different majors. But you always made time for each other even when life got busy. You two would study constantly and promised to have one meal together once a week. And you two never broke that promise.

Anyone who witnessed your friendship always commented there was something more. Joshua saw it too. He easily fell for you. How couldn't he? You accepted every version of himself and were the person who brought him an immense source of comfort. He couldn't imagine life without you.

Unfortunately, he had to imagine what it would be like to be with you.

"Do you think he's worth it?" You sighed.

The two of you were on FaceTime. It was a Tuesday night. While Joshua was at home, waiting for his food delivery, you were busy getting ready for a date.

Part of the reason why Joshua had to imagine what life would be like if you two were together is because you were seeing someone. For the past few months, you've been dating this guy named Ben. Now, Joshua didn't think much of Ben at first. He didn't seem like your type, so he thought he would come and go.

And he has to some extent. Ben and you had this awful habit of breaking up and getting back together. While it pained Joshua to see you with someone else, he loved the moments you confided him about your dating woes. He took mental notes of dos and donts for when you two (hopefully) get together. Ben was striking out left and right, mainly due to his poor communication. What Joshua didn't understand was why you always found yourself going back to him.

"Y/n, I don't know. You guys break up so much, I've lost count," he laughed. "It's only been 3 times," you groaned. "3 times what? This week?" "But he said he's changed this time. I mean, he even sent flowers to my apartment after our argument two nights again. That's got to mean something, right?" Joshua wanted to roll his eyes so much at your rationale. He adored you with every fiber in his being, and he didn't want to come across as dismissive, but he felt frustrated both because of you and for you. Ben was not worth it in his eyes. Nobody is worth it for you except for him. But he was your best friend. That was his role. "Maybe, angel. But there's only so much flowers can do to make up for how he treats you sometimes." Your smile had flattened by Joshua's words. And it pained him. He never wanted to be a source of sadness in your life. I guess that's why Joshua often pushed his feelings for you aside. He didn't want to be selfish and confess because that might cause a bigger mess. He loved you. He has since he was 8 years old. If you only saw him as a best friend, he would proudly take that role.

In a perfect world, you would confess to Joshua your feelings. He was ready to embrace those feelings head-on because he knew how he felt about you. What kept him back was not knowing how you felt towards him. You've always been so prominent in each other's lives. He didn't want to imagine a world without you. He was terrified that if he did ever confess, it would only push you away.

Joshua had found himself as the leading man in a tragic love story. "Just promise me something?" He requested. "Whatever you decide, follow your heart."

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You had to hang up the phone call in order to get ready for your date. Joshua sighed once you face vanished from his phone. He set the phone on the coffee table before driving his fingers through his hair.

How could this happen? You were supposed to be with him, not with some random guy you met who knows where? Not with someone who doesn't see your value.

The whole situation frustrated him beyond belief. On paper, you guys were a perfect match. You two knew each other like the back of your hand. Even when you did have a disagreement, you guys would not allow it to blow up. You spoke to each other with respect, even if you were both angry because you cared about each other. In some ways, you could say you loved each other. Joshua definitely was in love with you.

He has received relentless teasing from his friends about his lack of making a move on you. His friends thought even pushing might cause him to crack. And it almost did. Yet, he was still afraid of losing you and now he might actually be.

You always saw him as a friend, or at least that's what Joshua believed. You two were best friends, nothing more and nothing less. This wasn't some love story where the childhood best friends fall for each other, no matter how many times he prayed it would happen. This was his reality. If he had to let you go to keep you in his life, he would. And he would be there to pick up the pieces each time.

Suddenly, a buzz brought Joshua out of his mind and back to the present moment. He sat up a little straighter, looking towards the door of his apartment. Did he hear that correctly? He glanced towards the clock on the wall. 8:16pm.

Ding dong. Who could that be?

Joshua pushed himself off of the couch before shuffling towards the door. It was just a short walk towards the front of the apartment. He slowly unlocked the top lock and twisted the doorknob to unlock his front door.

There you were.

"Y/n?! What happened?" "Why didn't you fight for me?"

Your voice was calm, yet your body language screamed rage. You had your hair pulled back in a clip, exposing your bare face to the world. You looked divine, but Joshua didn't have time to compliment you. He noticed how your eyebrows were slightly scrunched up while you stared into him. He thought your gaze was going to burn a hole right through them. You were wearing a zip-up hoodie and sweatpants.

"Answer me, Joshua."

Oh no, I'm in deep shit. He was at a loss for words as he stared at you. His mind racking through all the interactions you had. Did he say something over FaceTime? Did he forget to say something? Did you ask him to do something but he forgot? He was drawing a blank.

"Do you like me yes or no, Joshua? Because everyone is saying you do besides you."

His eyes grew wide at that statement. Who spilled? "Y/n, listen-" "No, Joshua, you listen. How dare you let me go on dates with people who treat me poorly. You're my best friend! We're supposed to tell each other everything." That part you whispered. "How could you not tell me?"

"What a damn minute," Joshua finally said. He had a raised eyebrow before opening the door all the way. He stepped aside to let you in, motioning for you to follow him. "I am not going to argue with you outside of my apartment. Get in." You sighed and nodded, slowly stepping in. Obviously something happened in between from the moment you guys to now. Who did you speak to? Who told you his secret? Why were you angry?

Once you were fully into his apartment, Joshua closed the door. You immediately found a spot on his couch, right beside where he was previously sitting. Your hands were locked in front of you, your one leg bouncing. Your breathing was starting to slow down a bit but you gaze was still locked on him. While not as intense, you still had your eyes trained on him.

"Can I get you a water or something before we continue this conversation?" He asked gently.

"There you go again!" You groaned. Your head leaned until it hit the pillow behind you. Your gaze is now trained on the ceiling above you two. He was surprised, completely speechless as he thought he was doing the right thing. "I'm so sick of you being nice to me."

Joshua raised an eyebrow before shuffling over to you. He took a seat on the couch beside you but kept enough distance. He wasn't sure how to process all that was transpiring, but he needed to understand where you were coming from. And apparently have some explaining to you.

"Y/n, sweet girl, you need to tell me what's going on." "You is what is going on," you confessed.

Slowly, you sat up until you were at eye level with him once again. The room was tense. He was nervous, afraid that what you had been told was going to bring his worst fear to reality - that he might lose you. "Joshua, you've set too high of a standard for me. You're kind without asking for anything in return. You treat me like a fucking princess when I'm only your best friend. I'm angry that we aren't together but you treat me better than any guy I've been with."

Was this actually happening? Were you confessing to him? "Y/n, do you like me?" 'I have liked you since I knew what it meant to have a crush on someone," you admitted. "But."

Not the cursed 'but.' "We're best friends. I didn't eat to be presumptuous and think you like me when we've been friends for so long. But then Seungkwan told me that you had feelings for me yesterday. I didn't think it was true especially not when you pushed me to go out with someone else tonight."

Fuck. "Y/n, look, we are best friends," Joshua began. You looked at him as if you just stabbed him in the heart. "But, I fell in love with my best friend."

Very gently, he took both of your hands in his. You stared up at him with a facial expression he couldn't recognize. This was new for both of you. You were venturing into uncharted territory for the two of you. His thumbs caressed over your knuckles which both soothed your nerves but caused your heart to pound faster. "This was not the way I planned on telling you," he confessed. "I actually wanted to tell you once you were single again because I didn't want to stand in the way of being happy." This time, you reached out to him. Keeping one hand in his, your other hand reached over to run your fingers through his hair, pushing the strands back to expose his face more. You seemed to relax under your touch which made you smile for the first time that evening. "Josh, I'm my happiest when I'm with you. Have I not made that clear in all the years we've known each other?" "Y/n, you know I have too much respect for you and too much invested in this friendship to just assume someone like you could ever be into me." You squeezed his hand gently, unable to stifle the giggle leaving your lips. You moved closer to him, our lips almost right under his. "This is so silly. What are we doing? Why are we keeping ourselves from being our happiest versions of ourselves?" He smirked at your question. With his free hand, he cupped your cheek gently. His thumb caressed over your cheek affectionately as he gazed into your eyes. He always has been mesmerized by the fact that your eyes captured any light in the room. They sparkled like two disco balls. "Let's change that," he murmured.

Time stopped. He leaned in so his lips grazed against yours as if he was testing the waters. He wanted to make sure you were comfortable with what was about to happen, as there was no turning back. When you didn't pull away, he got the green light he's been chasing after. His lips fully pressed against yours.

Your head gently tilted up, leaning to the side so your lips fit against him like two missing puzzle pieces. It felt like tiny sparks were going off against your lips. It was a feeling the two of you would soon be addicted to. And it felt so comfortable, so natural. His lips slowly chased after yours for a moment.

Even though he felt the urge to continue kissing you, to never let this moment pass, he did pull back. His forehead found yours, revealing the wide grin the two of you wore. He couldn't help but chuckle before pecking your lips once more. Joshua was just over the moon. He was eager for whatever may be next for the two of you, especially now that there were no limitations. You were his best friend, but now the girl who knew how he felt.

"I kept my promise you know," you spoke softly.

Joshua raised an eyebrow but kept a warm smile. Now what were you talking about? "You had me promise to follow my heart. And I did. You've been my heart, my love all this time."

For You, I'd Do Anything - Yang Jeongin

Synopsis: The holidays can be a tough time for anyone. Growing up, it was your favorite time of year. As an adult though, it was what you dreaded the most. Jeongin couldn't stand by to see his partner upset over the holidays, so he decided to take matters into his own hands, to show you that the holidays with him could be fun.

Pairing: Idol! Yang Jeongin x reader

Genre: fluff, established relationship

Word Count: 2.3k

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Growing up, you used to love the winter holidays. You were the type of person that loved decorating for Christmas the day after Halloween. You looked forward to all the Christmas specials and movies that would be broadcasted on TV. Every time you were driving in your car from November 1st until December 26th, you had Christmas music playing. It was just the time of year that wrapped you up with warmth and joy.

Now, being in yours 20s, things have shifted. You no longer looked forward to decorating, always feeling the need to do it out of an obligation rather than a joy. You didn't really care for what was showing on TV, maybe watching one movie for the whole season if there was nothing else on. And don't even get started on the music. You couldn't take listening to the old songs sung by Bing Crosby or Dean Martin.

As friends move away and family spreads out, you find yourself getting lonelier each year. This year was the worst of it all. You couldn't afford a plan home to visit your family, so you had to stick it out at home. Your family wasn't in a position where they could fly out to you either, seeing as both of your parents worked and your siblings were only in college.

Part of you was hoping this year might be a bit different. You and Jeongin had gotten together in February of this year, shortly after your birthday. You were childhood friends with Seungmin who actually set you two up. Since then, you've been joined at the hip.

You were two lonely souls around Valentine’s Day. Seungmin couldn’t stand the sight of his younger brother feeling unwanted. To him, Jeongin was his partner in crime. He deserved the best the world had to offer. He was tired of you complaining about bad first dates and venting to him about your love life. Seungmin thought it would be a pretty good match. It would at least keep you quiet for a little bit while helping Jeongin out.

Jeongin was the perfect guy for you. He was a good listener and someone you felt safe around. You didn’t feel the need to put up a false persona to win him over. He never judged you either for your likes and interests, unlike your other exes. If something made you happy, he was all in support of it.

And Jeongin was in love with you. This was not a two-sided love. You were witty, intelligent, compassionate - a golden person. It loved that you got along well with his members. You were able to have deep insightful conversations with Chris and Han. You could be just as loud as Lee Know and Changbin. You appreciated the arts which made talking to Hyunjin easy. Felix and you often baked together. And then there was you and Seungmin who acted like brother and sister, being able to support one another but then be at each other’s neck the next minute. He was convinced bickering was Seungmin’s love language.

When you were with Jeongin, you knew how to make him smile and let him be silly. You were also there to comfort him if he had a bad day at the recording studio or dance practice. You offered a safe haven where he didn’t have to be the well-rounded maknae. Jeongin had a tendency to put too much pressure on himself to be perfect, to land every dance movement or not. You helped remind him that he was good enough, to push through the bad moments to keep chasing his dream. He wasn't just an idol to you. In your mind, he was like any regular 20-something-year-old who was trying their best. He was able to just be Yang Jeongin.

He wanted to give you the world. You deserved that. You radiated so much positive energy that it affected everyone around you. He owed Seungmin his life for introducing you two.

However, Jeongin noticed a shift in you. He remembers one of the first things Seungmin told, or more so warned, is that you were the type of person who had to start decorating for the holidays right after Halloween. Jeongin still didn't know why Seungmin felt the need to warn him about that fact, as if that was meant to scare him off. If anything, your enthusiasm around the holidays also got him excited for seasons changing.

It was easy to get lost in what's going on when you're following back-to-back schedules. It just felt like the holidays always crept up on him. The only thing that seemed to remind him what time of year it was is when they have a Christmas inspired stage.

Yet, when Jeongin suggested making hot chocolate and watching Christmas movies, you immediately said no. He figured maybe you were too tired from work. Jeongin settled for your answer, at least figuring you’ll watch them later in the season.

When you rejected going to the winter carnival in the city, he was a bit concerned. It was last Saturday when he asked. He figured now was a great time as any to get into the holiday season. You both had the day off from work, so he saw it as not only a way to enjoy each other's company and make new memories but also to relax from work. You preferred to stay inside though.

Jeongin even thought you could try setting up a Christmas tree in the dorms as a way to get you and the members into the holiday season. While he wasn't sure where to get a Christmas tree in South Korea, he knew how much you enjoyed spending time with the members. He always thought you were part of the family that has been created since they were training together at JYP. Yet, you still said no.

The boys were currently at dance practice. While Lee Know stood up from with Hyunjin, Changbin, and Han to work through the choreography for 'MEGAVERSE,' Jeongin was sitting on the couch with his hands holding up his chin.

He was trying his best to think of what could be troubling you, what could be on your mind. He was under the assumption that the two of you shared everything, from material items to personal secrets. To an extent, Jeongin was still trying to get to know you, sure. But he liked to believe as your boyfriend, he could pick up when things were off with you. What weren't you telling him?

Seungmin seemed to notice how distant his young friend was looking. Since it wasn't his time to dance, he made his way across the room to Jeongin. The maknae didn't flinch much once Seungmin plopped himself onto the couch, which was all an effort to snap Jeongin out of his daze. When that didn't work, Seungmin knew he had his work cut out for him. "Okay, spill. What's going on?"

Jeongin sighed before looking at his older friend. "It's y/n."

"What? What are you talking about? You're not going to break up with them, are you?"

Wow, for someone who pokes fun at y/n, Seungmin was very protective of you. It just further emphasized you and Seungmin's relationship - best friends who acted more like siblings.

To calm Seungmin down, he shook his head before looking over at him. "No, not at all. They are my everything," Jeongin sighed. "I just feel like I'm not giving them enough."

Seungmin looked at his friends to continue, confused as well. Whenever Seungmin talked to you about your relationship with Jeongin, you were on cloud nine. You could talk for hours about how wonderful of a partner Jeongin his, your favorite qualities of him. It made Seungmin pleased to see you so happy.

"They have just been acting so distant lately. Like, I feel like I have pushed them away. I don't get it." "I'm glad you said something," Seungmin sighed.

Jeongin immediately picked his head up, looking over at his friend. His eyes were wide, like a deer caught in headlights.

"What do you mean? Do you know something? Did I do something?" "Jeongin, if you did something, y/n will make it known. I mean, I would know first given that I'm the best friend and you're only the boyfriend," Seungmin teased. "But you haven't done anything wrong. I just feel like there is something wrong with y/n. Has she mentioned when’s flying home?”

It was then both of the men realized what was wrong. Usually, you were the type to have your holiday plans situated a month in advance. You also would plan a small holiday party with all your friends before everyone leaves for home. Your family and friends meant the world to you. However, this year, it was radio silent.

Jeongin then got a bright idea. He turned towards Seungmin who playfully backed up, a bit taken back from the eagerness of the maknae but also pleased that your boyfriend was ready to set up and make things right."

"So here's the plan."

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"Where are we going, Jeongin?" You laughed. He had blindfolded your eyes when you got in the car. He was walking backwards with Han holding open the door for him. Jeongin squeezed both of your hands reassuringly, walking backwards to guide you into a room.

"Now if I told you, it would ruin the surprise." "I hate surprises, but you're lucky you're cute," you muttered.

It took everything in Seungmin and Changbin, especially, to not let out a laugh. They couldn't give away the surprise. Not when they saw how excited Jeongin was to surprise you and make you feel better. Even before you and their beloved maknae started dating, they knew how much you meant to Seungmin. They all looked at you like a little sister. Their love for you has honestly intensified since the love between you and Jeongin grew.

"And I'm lucky because I have you," Jeongin responded.

This time Seungmin wanted to gag.

Jeongin glanced behind him to see all the boys in their places. Each of the boys gave them a thumbs up from their positions in the space, with Lee Know by the lights switch.

When he was satisfied, he slowly stepped behind you. He leaned around to kiss your cheek gently as his hands reached back to undo the knot that held the blindfold close to your eyes. You truly were one that hated surprises. If the blindfold was even the slightest bit loose, you would be trying to peek.

"Look, I know if you hate this, but I just want to see my girl smile again," Jeongin stated.

The blindfold was loosened from around your eyes, revealing that you were in the infamous red-painted JYP dance practice room. . It didn't look like the practice room.

There were Christmas lights strung around the mirrors. The lights were emphasized once Lee Know turned off the practice room's lights. A large projection screen was set up, thanks to Chan's assistance, opposite of the black couches. It was connected to a laptop with every major streaming service available. There were two extra beanbag chairs for those that preferred to sit on the floor. In the corner of the room, there was a large Christmas tree that was decorated. You could tell that was Hyunjin's assigned task. If you turned slightly too, you noticed there was a table full of baked goods that made the whole room smell like cinnamon and sugar. Definitely Felix's doing. You noticed there were 9 cups with candy canes sticking out of it. Maybe they got Changbin to do that one?

Regardless of who was assigned to each task, you knew there was only one person responsible - Jeongin. You turned towards him with tears in your eyes, but not the sad ones. The smile on your face gave away your joy.

"You did all of this for me?" "Anything for you," he affirmed.

You turned fully towards Jeongin before you wrapped you arms around him. You buried your face into his shoulder, both as a place to soak in your tears and your favorite spot to nuzzle up to him. He matched the strength of your hold, holding you close to him. He kissed the top of your hand, hand caressing your back affectionately. The rest of the members watched with fondness at the love between the two of you. Seungmin being the happiest of them all.

"You're apart of our family, y/n. I know it isn't the same as being with your family, but you can always depend on us," Jeongin whispered. "I love you so much."

You pulled your head gently back to look up at Jeongin. He smiled gently seeing your face. Keeping one arm around you, he used his free hand to wipe away your tears. "I'm in love with you too, baby," you whispered. You then looked at the guys surrounding the two of you. You could have sworn that they were crying too, but they wouldn't confess with the lights being dim. "And I love you guys too."

Shortly after, the nine of you gathered on the couches with Seungmin and Lee Know opting for the beanbag chairs. Changbin was getting hot chocolate together for the group while you cuddled up to your boyfriend. Most of them were paying attention to Elf playing on the projector. Jeongin held you close, as if he was trying to squeeze out any remaining sadness that might still be in your body.

But truth be told, you weren't sad anymore. If anything, you were over the moon that not only you have the best partner anyone could ask for, but that he opened his world to you.

To be with your family for Christmas was all you asked for, and it was the best present you could have received.

Still You - Boo Seungkwan

Inspired by: Still You - Seungkwan - Seungkwan's OSTs are literally my favorite songs to listen to

Pairing: idol! Boo Seungkwan x reader

Genre: Angst - break up/first time seeing your ex after the breakup

Word Count: 2.4k

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People his age were graduating from college, were getting into a groove of the 9-5 routine, and were starting to plan out the rest of their lives. This meant that for some people his age, hell, some even younger, were starting to settle down and have kids.

Of course, Seungkwan doesn't take his life for granted. If anything, he is extremely blessed to be able to have all these opportunities. It was a rocky start for Seungkwan and his members, his brothers. Yet, they preserved to reach their goal of being a group of 13 dedicated individuals who were singing their hearts out for the crowd.

There was just one part of Seungkwan's life that he was missing - you. You had been such a constant in his life until you guys mutually decided to end things.

Letting you go was one of the hardest thing's Seungkwan had to do in his life. He just felt frustrated that he couldn't be there for you, that in some way, he has been letting you down. All around him, he saw friends around him making huge milestones with their significant others. It made him feel even worse. He felt like he couldn't be the partner you deserved, and that in some way he was holding you back from being the happiest version of yourself.

But since you walked away, he felt even worse. It was like there was a blackhole in his life depleting him of any joy he could potentially feel. Every award won, he wanted to be able to celebrate with you. He wanted to tell you about all the exciting opportunities lining up for him, or all the funny stories of all the members. He just couldn't bring himself to pick up the phone and call you in case you didn't pick up. He would understand, of course, if you never wanted to hear from him again.

Maybe in another lifetime you guys could've made it worse. Or maybe someday, they'll invent time travel so he can travel back to warn the past version of himself not to make the biggest mistake he could ever make.

"Are you sure you don't want to come out with us?" Jeonghan asked. "Yeah, I'm sure. I've been thinking about my bed since we left the company," Seungkwan responded back.

Normally, Jeonghan would have teased Seungkwan and tried convincing him to come out. However, being the one that lives with Seungkwan, he got to see how bad this breakup was affecting him, even more than he wanted to let on to the others. Jeonghan didn't like the idea of leaving Seungkwan home alone when he was this upset, but he also respected his wishes.

"Text if you need anything," he stated. He was very protective of one of his youngest brothers.

Seungkwan flashed a gentle smile before turning to retreat back to his bedroom for the remainder of the night. Yes, he wanted to be in his bed, but he wanted to just be alone with his thoughts. Maybe he could try to come up with a way to get you to take him back? Maybe he could find the courage to text you, just to see how you're doing?

Once in his room, Seungkwan locked the door. He slid off the blue button up sweater he had on. He shivered slightly from the difference in air temperature once he was left only in a white t-shirt. Slowly, he shuffled over towards his dresser. Might as well get comfortable for the rest of the night. He took off his belt followed by his baggy, ripped jeans and replaced the denim with black sweatpants.

He then proceeded to flop on his bed. One hand rested on his chest, the other running through his head. His feet were dangling over the edge of the bed. Staring up at the ceiling, he still thought of you. Were you happy? Were you eating and taking care of yourself? Were you seeing someone else?

The thought of you moving on to someone else pained him. While you were dating, Seungkwan didn't think much of the future. What he enjoyed most of the relationship was living in the moment with you. With an unpredictable lifestyle like his, he never wanted to make promises that could easily be broken. Your care-free personality made it easy to welcome unexpected changes to plans.

Now that you two were a thing of the past, the future was all he could think about. He didn't even get the chance to introduce you to his family back in Jeju yet he knew he wanted everything with you. He wanted to move into an apartment with you, find out what little habits you have and what your routines looked like. He wanted to plan getaways together where you explore a new place. Seungkwan knew eventually he wanted to get down on one knee and ask you to be his forever. Now, that might be far into the future, but he knew you were his end game one way or another.

Why didn't I just talk things out with her? Why did I push her away?

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door which caused him to groan. It was probably Jeonghan trying his luck again to get him to go out. He sat up, his left knee bending to rest on the bed.

"Hyung, I told you no. Leave me alone, ok?"

There was a moment of silence after Seungkwan spoke. Wow, Seungkwan finally found a way to get Jeonghan to admit defeat. There was a first thing for everything.

"Want me to go even if it isn't Jeonghan?"

Seungkwan froze completely. He was about to lay back down in his bed, allow himself to be absorbed back into his thoughts, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. There is no way he can go back to what he was doing if he just heard correctly. There is no way it was you. It couldn't be.

He let out a shaky breath, praying that he heard incorrectly. Maybe it was just his mind playing tricks on him again? There was on time he was performing and he thought it was you in the crowd. He just needed to get more sleep. Not until though he got closure who was standing outside of his door.

Every one and while, his step caused the floor to creak. A sign that there was life in his bedroom and not just an empty. He reached his front door, looking at it for a moment.

You're just imagining things, Seungkwan. It really is just Jeonghan or one of the other guys trying their best to get you to join them.

"Jeonghan, seriously, it's not funny. Just go-" Seungkwan spoke as he opened the door.

It wasn't Jeonghan standing behind the door. It was you. You stood there, almost as if you were unsure why you were standing there yourself. Your gaze was locked on the door in front of you, so the moment the door open, you were staring at each other. "Jeonghan invited me," you said softly. "I really hope that is ok. I didn't know if it was a good idea or not, so I can just go." "I'm not letting you walk out a second time."

You both seemed surprised by the words that left his lips. You couldn't help but smile in satisfaction at his response. While Seungkwan was flipping out in his mind. He knew he meant what he said, but nothing prepared him for this exact moment.

Slowly, Seungkwan opened bedroom door to allow you in. He stepped to the side, so you could step in. Knowing the house was empty, he kept the door open. He didn't want you to feel though you were forced to talk to him. Sure, you still came on your own accord but Seungkwan was very aware you could leave at any moment. Maybe this was all a dream that he would wake up from?

You seemed to float into his room. Almost like you were magical. You were magic in his eyes. He watched as you entered his room and took a spot at the edge of the bed. He began to replay the memories of other times you've entered his bedroom - after date nights, coming home from the airport, sleepovers. He hesitated at first. Should he sit beside you? Should he remain standing?

"Is this too awkward?" You asked. You fiddled with your fingers as you looked at him. "I can just go, Seungkwan. I mean, I thought maybe this could be a good idea? But I'm starting to think it's not." Before he could even speak, he rushed over to join you on the bed. He sat to your left-hand side. His eyes were trained on you, not wanting to make you uncomfortable and feel overcrowded but also wanted to reassure you that this is what he wanted, what he needed. "No, no, angel. I'm still just surprised you're even here. Sorry, I don't want you to think I don't want you here," he confessed. "I do gotta ask. Why are you here?"

Truth be told, you weren't sure where why you showed up. You never thought you would be back here. Of course, you and Seungkwan did not end up on bad terms. Maybe there was a part of you holding onto hope that things would work out. And hearing from Jeonghan that Seungkwan has been struggling was enough to push you to come over.

"I just wanted to know that you are alright," you admitted.

Seungkwan couldn't help but smile at that sentiment. She still cares about me. He never thought this moment would come. Truthfully, he never even thought you two would cross paths again. He figured he blew any chances of getting back together when he called quits. He wouldn't blame you either.

"Honestly? I'm not okay. I haven't been okay since you left," Seungkwan confessed.

No turning back now. To be honest, Seungkwan didn't realize what he had said until it was already out there. He needed to backup his claims, really show that he meant what he said. He had to make sure you knew how genuine he was. "Look," he began. He grabbed your hand gently. He glanced at you to make sure that what he decided to do was okay. When you didn't pull your hand away, he allowed his thumb to caress your knuckles gently. Seungkwan never thought he would get to be this close to you again. God, I've missed her.

"I let you go because I thought it was best for you. I cannot be the man you need because of my life. Sure, I love the days we spend together but I feel like I spend far too many days without you than with you. I want you to live a happy life, angel. You deserve to have someone who can commit a hundred percent, who you can make a life with rather than follow around. Y/n, I want you to have everything you've ever wanted."

Your eyes were wide. You were looking at him. Not saying anything. Seungkwan wasn't expecting you to respond right away. If you did, he knew that you might reject what he said. However, he also wasn't anticipating the silent between the two of you. The tension in the room was so thick, he felt like he was suffocating.

Please, y/n. Say something.

"Seungkwan," you breathed out. "You've got to be kidding me, right?"

He thought he was about to encounter his worst dream. Instead, he was taken back by sudden movement beside him. Your hand slipped out of his only to be replaced by putting your hands on his shoulders. You moved over from beside him to into his lap, straddling his lap.

Once you were situated, you moved one hand from his shoulder to cup his face. Your thumb ran over his cheek as you gazed into his eyes. He looked up at you like you were made out of diamonds. You have been and always will be the most precious person in his life. His hands situated themselves to hold your waist.

"I'm my happiest when I'm with you. I want you to be happy which is why I walked away. Not because you were right," you admitted. "Somehow, you convinced yourself that I needed to have life figured out right now, but Seungkwan, I don't. I want to figure it out with you though, whatever that looks like. I like that our love story is unequally ours." "But I can't give you weekly date nights, I can't give you a wedding right now." "Wait, what makes you think I want to get married right now?" "Baby, I saw the wedding invitation on your countertop a few weeks ago. You have friends reaching those big milestones but I can't give that to you quite yet because I'm not ready."

You frowned slightly at Seungkwa's words. Not in disappointment. You were saddened to hear that Seungkwan had all this built up frustration and self-doubt that led to you two breaking up.

"Oh, honey. I don't care if my other friends are getting married, having kids, or whatever else is expected out of adults. I just want us. I want us to weather each storm together, to grow up together," you affirmed. "I want you back."

That is all he needed to hear. In a swift movement, Seungkwan switched positions so you were lying on his bed. He grinned when you squealed in surprise. Your laughter was music to his ears. Your arms wrapped around his neck. He kept one hand on your side, the other holding him up. "How about I start making up for lost time?"

"Yeah, I think that's a good idea." You couldn't fight the smile that was curling wide in your lips. It was getting to the point your cheeks began to ache. You could care less. You were right where you wanted to be, where you've been craving.

Slowly, Seungkwan began lowering his face towards yours. His lips grazed yours. Goosebumps ran down your spine with excitement. His lips were about to fully press against when you heard someone clear their throat.

It caused you to jump for which Seungkwan popped up. He squeezed your hip reassuringly as he looked over his shoulder. Seungkwan let out a loud groan and had his head press against the pillow beside you once he saw who it was.

Jeonghan.

"I knew you two would get back together! I am a genius."

You couldn't help but laugh. You turned your head to press a kiss into Seungkwan's cheek.

You missed this.

My View - Lee Felix

Synopsis: Felix was a hard-working guy. He never thought he would be able to achieve his dreams of being a performer. It was even better that he got to experience this journey with his best friends and his biggest supporter, you, his significant other. That doesn't mean Felix doesn't have his bad days.

"If only you could see things from my perspective right now."

Pairing: Idol! Lee Felix x reader Genre: Angst - frustration from rehearsals, established relationship, comforting Felix, fluff towards the end. (I would seriously go to war for Felix)

Word Count: 2.2k

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Pulling up to the JYP building always filled you with excitement. Every time you step through the front doors, you never knew what was awaiting for me. Part of that was due to the eight rowdy boys who called the building their second home. You often heard them before you saw them.

Felix and you have only been together for a few months now. You were still an unfamiliar face walking around the building, which the boys used to their advantage when they wanted to pull pranks and get into trouble. Well, seven of them were always up for causing chaos. Chris preferred to watch from afar and quickly clean up any messes that popped up before anyone noticed. Such a great leader.

You were easily becoming a part of the Stray Kids family. The younger members looked to you as a shoulder to lean on, someone to give advice. Felix’s hyungs approved because they saw how much joy you brought to their sunshine. You were never shy of showing you affection for Felix, always reminding him of your pride in not just being his partner but watching him do what he loved the most. You helped bring normalcy into their lives where they were just a group of guys in their 20s living their best life. They just happened to have high profile careers.

You, on the other hand, worked in the nonprofit sector. Your job focused on education opportunities for immigrant youth. Ironically, your job occupation is one of the many things Felix found attractive about you. Not only was he captivated by your beauty, but he admired your drive and compassion. It takes a lot from someone to do the work you do, but you made it seem so effortless. It just showed how much you cared.

It was late on a Thursday night. You and your team had been prepping for a fundraising event which was taking much of your attention and energy. Nobody really understands how much goes into a nonprofit until they work in one.

Today was one of the days where you two felt like you were pulled in different directions. Felix has been busy the last few days with dance practices, so you knew he had late nights as well. You two would send texts to each other throughout the day, checking in and supporting each other the best you could. Saturdays were reserved just for the two of you for date nights though, so you were relieved knowing you’d see him soon.

The only thing on your mind was ordering take-out and sleeping. That completely changed though when you got a call from Chan. That's odd. He never called me.

You picked up the phone as you put your keys into the apartment door, about to unlock it. "Hey Chan, what's up?" "Y/n? Are you still at work?" "No, I actually just got back to my apartment. What's going on?" "Come to the studio. Now. It's Felix."

Your heart dropped at the mention of Felix. Your mind began racing through all the possibilities of what could be wrong. Was he injured? Did something happen? Whatever it was, you knew you couldn't waste anymore time. "Y/n?" "Sorry, I'm coming," was all you said.

Just as quick as you unlocked it, you yanked the keys out and slammed the front door shut. Your feet carried you quickly down the steps leading up to your unit and straight to your car in the parking lot. You had this sickening feeling in your gut that something was wrong. Especially by the urgency in Chan's voice. He was not the type of guy to sugarcoat anything.

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By the time you got to the JYP building, Hyunjin was upfront waiting for you. That's not a good sign. You parked your car in the guest parking lot before jumping out with your keys, forgetting about your pursue. All that mattered was how quickly you could get to Felix.

"Hyunjin-ah, what's wrong?" "I don't even know. I was just told to wait up front for you, so I could make sure your car is locked. He's in the practice room."

You tossed your car keys to Hyunjin before you took off running towards the practice room. You noticed that five of the other boys lined up the hallway outside of the room. Chan must be in there with Felix. The sight made your heart drop.

Your heavy breathing and footsteps gained the attention of the five members outside. They both looked concerned yet relieved to see you. You didn't have enough time to ask questions before making your way towards the door. All of their eyes were trained on you.

Very gently, you knocked on the door. You didn't want to cause anymore stress, regardless of what might be happening on the other side of the door.

"Changbin, I know you care, but we just need y/n," Chan shouted out from inside. "Chan, it's y/n. I am here."

Silence filled the hallway as everyone seemed to listen in. You could hear footsteps from the other side of the door. You didn't even know you were holding your breath as your mind spiraled to what could be happening on the other side.

The door opened slowly. It revealed Chan who seemed to be a bit revealed. But looking into his eyes, you knew that there was something wrong.

"Guys, listen, I know we all car about Felix, but he only wants y/n right now," Chan explained. His voice was scarily calm yet also quiet. You were always appreciative that Chan looked out for his members, his brothers, his kids. Especially always looking after Felix.

The rest of the guys nodded their heads. They stepped back to make Sur they weren't overcrowding the doorway. All of them cared for one another, so they would do anything for each other.

Chan slowly opened the door, granting you access. He smiled at you as you swapped positions. You were now inside the room where as he joined the rest of the kids out in the hallway. The door closed behind you which caused you to turn fully towards your beloved.

He was sitting on the floor of the practice room, his head in his hands. Of course, some practices got Felix frustrated. You were always there to comfort him, to help him work through any of the choreography to the best of your ability. He always managed to work through it, seeing those frustrations as motivation. This was different.

It was eerily silent in the room. The only thing you could hear was soft sniffles. Each one causing cracks in your heart.

"Lixie?" You called out. You didn't want to make things worse and startle him. You also were aware maybe that he needed space, so you didn't want to violate any of his personal space.

He picked his head up, looking straight ahead. Your eyes met in the reflection of the mirror. A trail of tears was marked on his cheeks, the light catching the wet trail. His eyes were a bit red, which you weren't sure if it was how long he'd been crying or from his hands pressed into his gorgeous face.

"Y/n."

His eyes didn't leave yours. He needed you.

Without running over, you walked to him. You knew sudden movements would make matters worse. In this room, it was just the two of you. You moved with urgency across the practice floor until you were in front of him.

Once you were in front of him, you took a seat on the floor in front of him. You were sitting criss-crossed, your hands gently reaching out to his. You offered a gentle smile. His hands slipped into yours. It was a start. "What's going on, love?" You asked gently.

Now, you weren't sure if Felix wanted to even talk about what he was dealing with. However, you knew it was better to offer than say nothing at all. Felix always knew he could vent to you whenever, but you still liked to remind him that it was safe to do so. You would wait here all day if need be, if that is what Felix needed.

"I'm not good enough," he murmured.

Your heart shattered hearing his self-doubt. There were times Felix got frustrated because he was just so passionate about performing. This is the only thing that he thought he was meant to do in this life. Sometimes you wondered if he thought back to when he got eliminated during their pre-debut days.

However, you knew how hard Felix has overcome to set that now minor setback. He was one of the most recognizable idols in k-pop, proving that to be true with his impressive vocal range and his impressive dance skills. He was born to be on stage. Yet, that didn't mean he didn't doubt himself.

"What happened?" "Lee Know was showing us new choreography he wanted to learn. It acquires a bit more acrobatics than what we usually do. I thought it would be no problem for me, but-"

You could see tears swelling in his eyes again. Some fell but he tried to quickly blink the rest. Letting go of one hand, you squeezed the other to show you had no intentions of leaving. With your now free hand, you reached forward to gently wipe the tears away that were falling onto his cheeks.

His head gently tilted into your thumb. Taking note, you let your full hand cup his cheek. He sighed at the feeling of the warmth of your palm. You smiled gently to see him responsive to you.

The last thing you would want is for Felix to feel like he is doing this on his own. He had his members, his family supporting you and he also had you. Felix always uplifted you on your worst days, helping to remind you of your self-worth. And you would always do the same. This was one of those moments where you needed to reemphasize your role as his significant other. "But I just can't get it. I can't move my body correctly which makes it feel like I'm not trying hard enough," he murmured. "Like I'm failing. You hear groups coming and going, how things can shift overnight. What if I'm the reason stays don't stay and why Stray Kids becomes just a memory and not a legacy? I don't want to disappoint you or the boys."

For a moment, you remained silent. You already were working through the words to say. While you weren't an idol yourself, you didn't want to invalidate Felix's emotions. You knew that the music industry was brutal and there were a lot of risks involved.

What you did know for sure was just how successful Stray Kids is, how successful he is. He was facing a challenge, like he had before, and he would overcome it. Felix just needed to believe in himself. "Baby boy, this is the first day of learning this choreography. It's not going to be perfect no matter how much you wish it was," you sighed. It was the truth. It was frustrating, yes, but it required practice. "I know for a fact though that the boys would never allow you to fail. Maybe you can keep practicing with Lee Know, or maybe you guys change the choreography. The guys will never let you feel like you fail because you guys are one team which means that you help each other out."

Felix nodded his head gently. He was slowly starting to accept his words but he couldn't quite ignore his personal demons yet. That is where you come in. You weren't going to leave his side until your sunshine returned.

"I don't want to disappoint you either." "Felix, love, that is impossible. You are my life, my love. I am impressed simply by your existence."

He raised an eyebrow at you, confused yet encouraging you to continue speaking. You gladly will praise him as much as he needs to hear, or how much anyone was willing to listen.

"I have never met someone as compassionate as you. Even when you are tired, you go out of your way to show your appreciation not just to your fans, to stay, but to the members, your family, and even me. You always are there to lend a helping hand because you care about everyone else sometimes before yourself. It is true you radiate sunshine because you capture everyone's attention, you can make everyone smile just by being in the same room as you."

For the first time since entering the dance studio, he smiled. His forehead leaned forward until he pressed against yours. You smiled up at him, just happy to see him feeling the slightest bit better.

"I am so lucky to have you even when I'm silly and can't regulate my emotions." "Felix, it's normal to feel frustrated. You know better than anyone that I get that way too. But that's why I'm here. I'm here to support you on your best days, your worst days, and the days in between."

You pulled back gently from him. You tilted your head up until your lips pressed against his forehead lingeringly. At the acton, he could feel his ears turn red but also his smile grow. His eyes fluttered shut, just to take in the moment.

He was the luckiest guy in the world to have you, and you felt like you were even luckier.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 🪩🖤

I hope 2024 brings you love, happiness, and peace. 2023 definitely has been one of the more challenging years of my life but one of the most exciting. I'm really looking forward to see what happens next!

Thank you to every single person who had liked and reblogged one of my pieces, followed, or just even clicked to read. With just getting started a little over a month ago, I am extremely grateful for the kindness this community has already shown me.

I already have a good feeling that 2024 will be one of the best years to come considering Ateez and Stray Kids have officially announced world tours 👀