Lee Felix X Y/n - Tumblr Posts
♪ song series ♪
hi! this is the second instalment in a series of oneshots i will be writing based on/inspired by a certain song. (note : in this particular fic there's another song featured) i recommend listening to the song(s) once before you read it <3
#2 summer love (song 1 | song 2)
pairing : lee felix x gn reader (established relationship)
genre : songfic, angstttt, pining, fluff if you squint, not a happy ending i'm afraid
warnings : none that i can think of, it's just sad ig. but if there's something you'd like me to add, lmk <3
w.c. : 1.7k
disclaimer : this is purely a work of fiction made for entertainment purposes only!
masterlist
← #1
22 hours left
You watch Felix as he goes around the kitchen getting the ingredients for the batter ready. You try to etch it all into your memory - his little nose scrunches, the way the sunlight streaming in through the window highlights his beautiful freckles, the shape of his lips… Sigh. Pictures never do him justice. And even if they did, what would be the point? You have to leave tomorrow and nothing could change that, or the grief that’s bound to follow.
Ugh, screw all those stupid romcoms and their happy couples and unrealistic endings! You wish it were as easy as they made it out to be, where one of them just quits their job and leaves home and everyone and everything they know basically, to move halfway across the world and be with the love of their life like it’s no big deal, like it’s the most practical decision ever, and of course they’re all loaded enough to be able to afford it. Stupid. Ridiculous. Know what’s even more ridiculous? The fact that you two had fallen so hopelessly in love over the span of just two months, knowing full well this relationship could have no future. Stupid stupid stupid. If the universe was so intent on handing you the cliché fall in love on vacation trope, why not give you the romcom ending as well? Why torture you like this?
Felix meets your gaze and smiles, though there's something sad about it. “Don’t do that please,”
“Do what?” you feign ignorance and blink innocently, which earns a proper smile from him this time. It tugs at your heart.
“You know what. Watch me with that forlorn look in your eyes. It makes me wanna bear hug you and never let go,” he says as he walks over and does just that.
Your lips curve up into a smile. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Lix. You’ll come up with any excuse to touch me,”
“Well if you don't like it–” he starts to pull away.
“Nooo I didn't say that,” you pull his arms back around you and you both laugh. Which is followed by a heavy silence that settles in the nooks and crannies of the room, somehow making the morning not so bright anymore. You're both joking around and dodging questions and being flippant because not doing that would mean having a serious conversation. Not doing that would mean confronting reality and having to say your goodbyes and you promised each other not to be all blue and gloomy on your last day together. You both know the other is also thinking about this, and how not talking about it is just making things weird.
Felix clears his throat, unwrapping his arms from around you. “I should get back to the pancakes. Don't wanna burn them like last time,”
“Right, haha,” you resist the urge to reach out and have him lock his arms around you again, trying to ignore how cold you suddenly feel.
You hate how painfully awkward you've become over the past few days – walking on eggshells and not being able to say what you're really thinking half the time, swallowing feelings and stopping mid-sentence.
Fifteen minutes later you're sitting at the table and Felix sets down a plate in front of you : choco chip waffles with chocolate syrup, whipped cream and ice cream. You gape at him. He’s indulging your sweet tooth way too much.
“You're trying to make me diabetic!” you complain, but give him a peck on his cheek.
“Only for today,” he chuckles and then bites his lip, realising he probably should’ve worded that better.
Only for today. Right. Because from tomorrow he won't even be able to see you, much less make you your favourite breakfast. And you're just supposed to go back to your old life and move on after….all this. After Felix. Totally easy. Totally–
“Hey you wanna watch a movie after?” he interrupts, sensing you going down a spiral. “And then go to the beach?”
You smile at his mention of the beach – it was where you first met. Where it all started. Where you’d spent most of your days together over the past two months. Playing silly games, learning how to surf. Lazy afternoons and late nights. Early morning walks along the shoreline to catch the sunrise. The first kiss you shared on one such walk. It all seems to have gone by in a blur.
17 hours left
You ended up not going to the beach.
You had put on a comedy movie but neither of you laughed much - not because the movie wasn’t funny, but because you just couldn’t bring yourselves to focus. Felix ended up dozing off halfway through, his head nuzzled on your shoulder. You watched the rest of the movie on mute, careful not to move or make a noise so you wouldn’t wake him. He woke up cursing about half an hour later, mad at himself for falling asleep and wasting what little time you have left together. You assured him it was fine, that you were happy just having him by your side. He complained that he wasn’t happy about having spent the half hour unconscious, especially when you were right next to him.
“You’re so cute when you’re sulky,” you’d said, smothering him with kisses. Then he started kissing you back, and uh, let’s just say that the two of you got a little carried away.
12 hours left
Felix sits you down in the living room saying he has a surprise for you.
“Don’t open your eyes until it’s time!”
“How will I know it’s time if I can’t see?”
“You’ll knoww.”
You frown. For a few seconds, there’s only silence. Then you hear a chair being pulled back a few feet away. You hear him clear his throat. You gasp when you hear the piano, your eyes snapping open. A lump forms in your throat as he flashes you a smile and starts singing the first line.
“I know, you know, we know
We weren't meant for each other and it's fine
But if the world was ending
You'd come over, right?
You'd come over and you'd stay the night
Would you love me for the hell of it?
All our fears would be irrelevant
If the world was ending
You'd come over, right?
The sky'd be falling and I'd hold you tight
And there wouldn't be a reason why
We would even have to say goodbye
If the world was ending
You'd come over, right?
Right?”
There’s something about the way he whisper-sings that last ‘right?’ because suddenly it’s impossible to hold the tears back any longer or pretend nothing's wrong. You run into his arms, clutching him so tight and wonder how the hell that single word could be packed with so much hope and despair and joy and sorrow at the same time because it honestly shattered you.
You suppose it's kind of funny in a sad way, because he's hastily wiping at your cheeks asking you to please not cry but he's crying too, and maybe one day you'll both be able to look back and laugh about this, but right now dear God, you swear you could physically feel your heart break into a million little pieces.
10 hours left
You’re both lying on the couch now, secretly grateful for the cramped space that makes being so squeezed up next to each other necessary. Neither of you suggests moving to the bedroom. You feel his body rise and fall with every breath and you try to focus only on that and not think about anything else. The sun has set and a soft summer breeze blows in through the open window. You watch him absentmindedly fiddle with your intertwined fingers.
“So much for not talking about it,” you snort.
“Well who asked you to start crying and ruin it?”
You elbow him. “Who asked you to choose that stupid song?”
“Hey don’t blame the song!”
“Oh no I’m blaming you, Lee Felix,”
He jabs you in the side playfully and then kisses your cheek. You tilt your head to look at him. His eyes are puffy and the tip of his nose red. Your heart aches at the sight, although your own face is probably no better at the moment. With your free hand, you push back the hair from his forehead. He closes his eyes as you trace lines along his freckles like they’re constellations. “Please don't come to drop me off tomorrow,” you say quietly.
His eyes snap open. He opens his mouth like he's about to protest, then thinks better of it and purses his lips. He nods once, solemnly. He wouldn’t be able to watch you walk away, either.
“Do you regret it?” he asks, after a few minutes of silence.
“What?”
“This. Us. Meeting me.”
“You're a dumbass if you think I do,”
He smiles and the ache eases a little. “I don't either. You're worth the heartbreak,”
You try not to let the word heartbreak sink in. “I didn't know you were capable of being so cheesy,” you tease.
“It's all the excess cheese from the Tteokbokki you made for lunch,” he answers without missing a beat.
“Well you gave me diabetes, it's only fair that I give you high cholesterol,”
He laughs. “God, Y/n...”
“Hmm?”
“Nothing,”
You look over at him again and you know what he meant to say. And why he didn't say it.
10 minutes
You were hoping you could leave quietly before Felix woke up like you had originally planned, but to your dismay and a bit of irritating delight, he was up even before you were. He made coffee, which you both drank at the table wordlessly. He helped with last-minute packing. Then he sat in the living room as you got ready, his expression unreadable.
Your suitcase is by the door. The taxi is waiting outside. You’ve checked and rechecked that you have your passport and other important items. You’ve avoided meeting his eyes since you woke up this morning although you stole plenty of glances when he wasn’t looking because you don’t know if you can handle what you see in them. But you can’t any longer – there’s hardly 10 minutes left before you have to walk out the door. Taking a deep breath, you make your way to where he’s standing. You hesitantly take his hand in yours – they’re cold despite the warm weather. You look up at him and– oh God. What are you even supposed to say? You don’t know and you don’t want to know, you don’t want to say anything that will make this real, you want to pretend none of this is happening. And so you just stare at him helplessly until he cups your face and presses his lips to yours and the entire world melts away for a few minutes.
You had never said your ‘I love you’s. But when you pulled back from the kiss and he looked at you with that earnestness in his watery eyes, it was as clear as day. You knew. And as you make your way to the airport, you can only pray that he knows too.
(Actual clip of Felix singing the song for extra feels)
wind and water: series masterlist
summary: People always had a way of looking at you as if your skin were composed of paper mâché and your heart was made of glass. They just assumed you were kind of like a weak bird . . . but Felix Lee looked at you like you still had some flight left.
pairing: lee felix x fem!reader rating/genre: 18+ Minors DNI | surfing au, childhood friends to lovers, slice of life, angst, fluff, smut status: on going notes/warnings: this entire fic is hurt comfort filled with characters that have been through too much too young, so proceed with caution. both characters (reader and felix) are extremely traumatized by the death of their parents, so this fic deals with topics that aren't to be taken lightly. topics discussed would be: parental death, parental neglect, suicidal ideation, and mental illness (anxiety, depression, etc), so please tread lightly. please do not read if these topics are triggering. your mental health is important, so please take care of yourselves. <3
masterlist key: s - smut a - angst f - fluff
chapter one: this house is haunted - 15.7K (a) -> you're in the wind, and felix lee is in the water. both of you are sons and daughters of no one anymore. chapter two: can you see right through me? - 11.7K (s, a) -> you think you're kind of like a weak bird; felix lee believes you still have some flight left.
( more chapter tba . . . )
I will remember you(Part 2)
Extraordinary you!Au x Zombie Apocalypse!Au
Summary: The world was damned. A deadly virus going around turning everyone in zombies? Yeah, the world was definitely damned. But that was the least of his problems right now. Time was slipping by him..he had been hearing weird sounds. He decided that he was going crazy. Until a certain someone appeared and told him not to worry because apparently this all a fiction, more specifically a comic?
Words: 9k
AN: The next thing I want to put out is a Seungmin fanfic because I think people overlook him so much! I will try to organize my thoughts and put it out shortly! I hope you enjoy my work!
Part 1
Comic? Character? Me?
He shook his head, shaking the idea off him. There was absolutely no way. Thoughts were swimming around his head, making him feel light headed and dizzy. Was it really possible for all this to be a lie? He felt silly just by thinking it. The sunlight warming his skin felt real, the delightful laughter filling the classroom felt real, he felt real. Frustrated signs left him again.
Two days already passed since Y/N revealed to him the crazy shit that she thought the world consisted of. He recalled their conversation with disdain...
"Wow you are even more fucking crazy than I am"he exclaimed, beliwered. He took a step back, widening the distance between them. Who knows maybe a zombie bit her and all this were side effects.
"Maybe I am" she beamed happily, repeatedly patting the spot next to her expecting him to sit with her. He raised an eyebrow only to meet the same annoyingly cheery expression, he signed and caved. He slowly lowered himself to the ground, it was still warm from the setting sun above them he noticed.
"So do you want to learn more?"she inquired as she was talking with me about the weather ,hands busy brushing through her thick and tangled locks.
"Enlight me" he taunted her as he scanned the yard. He hadn't been here in months. From the level ground everything was way bigger than he remembered. Seeing it from up close was a reminder of the old times and how fucked up was his current situation.
"They won't come" she stated simply, still running her fingers through her brown locks. Total at ease in this environment. "I lounge here often enough. Never met a functioning zombie here"
"How come? Your writer doesn't fancy gardens? Oh!Oh! Are the zombies allergic?!" Irony was evident in his tone "That would explain soo much!"
"Ha ha..No, in the shadow they just...exist. They are not chasing us,not trying to eat us. I can just simply past one and it won't do anything. Just trust me"she shrugged, laying down to absorb as much sun as she could.
"I don't. Not even a little bit" he bit back and she laughed.
If he was honest that moment right there seemed straight out of a book. She laying there laughter filling the air, the sun setting behind them showering them in golden light, the breeze blowing just enough to feel refreshed and light. The flowers, even though they were dying like everything on this planet, still smelled wonderful. It was beautiful.. too bad he cared so little for it.
"So you're saying that this is a comic book? And what's the plot?" he snickered as he laid down as well. He normally would be so alert and ready to spring at any moment. But seeing her lazing around and being comfortable, made him more lazy as well. Her serenity calmed him oddly enough.
She shifted to her side, one arm supporting her weight to take a better look at him. She aspect him deeply, as if she was deciding to tell him a secret or not. He didn't know what expression he was wearing, maybe contempt or boredom, but she seemed to find whatever she was looking for. "Well, the zombie apocalypse trope is pretty obvious."
"Oh really? I hadn't noticed that!"he scoffed
"Surprise!" She joked back, an ironic laugh leaving her "other than that.. you know the new girl? She is a spy from an opposite camp. The government is scavenging for survivors, the catch? They have limited space. So the smarter thing to do is eliminate the competition, according to them at least. Maniacs all of them if you ask me. Soo, they send her over to deal with us from the inside. Pretty stereotypical, right?"
His mouth fell open and his eyebrows flew to his hairline. Spy? The government? Every thought he was ready to voice in an rather rude way stayed there, catch in his throat "You are joking..right?"he eventually uttered.
"Wish I was believe me"she signed.
He didn't say anything for a while then he just stood up wordlessly and left.
And he had avoided her ever since like she was the plague.
He had to organize his thoughts. Provided she was telling the truth..how could he prevent the invasion of an enemy camp? How could he make the government pick them? How could he stop the girl? He tried to find a perfect solution only to come up empty.
He spend many sleepless nights. Okay three to be exact! But he needed the sleep! He had things to do and errands to run but the thing is wherever he went, he kept seeing her. Like fate was playing some twisted game against him. He was helping out with weaponry? She was there. He was keeping watch? She was releasing him of his duties. Heck she even slept two classrooms away he discovered as he went to sleep yesterday and she called out good night to him, making him jump out of his skin and dart inside.
He was currently in the weaponry area, also known as the janitor's closet and the benches outside of it, as it held the most tools that were of use to them. His unwounded hand served as a painful reminder of that fact. As Felix was tying the rope around two broken broomsticks to serve as a spear that he had no experience handling. The many times he had accidentally sprung it upon random people near him confirmed that so his preference for knives and close range weaponry was clear but as a good fellow he helped. As he was finishing honing the weapon, he realized that she was there too. Brown hair pilled on top of her head in a way too messy bun, white T shirt with patches of dirty stuck on it, clearly stating that she was pulling her weight around the camp and oversized denim jeans shorts that was a clearly bad choice for someone that had to run at the drop of a hat. Was she around that often before? How come he didn't noticed her?
As he glanced at her, he suddenly met her stare. She blinked slowly at him as a smile spread on her face, a greeting. He immediately turned his head the other way, flustered to be caught looking so obviously at her.
Instead he focused on the craft in his hands, tying the ropes with way more vigor than necessary. With a few more tugs he was done.
"Hey-!" He started and paused, barely catching himself. What was his name again? He racked his brain trying to come up with an answer. He had been around this kid 6 months now, they slept at the same classroom and hang out frequently together after a long day's work, so it was not acceptable not to remember his name.
"Can't remember, can ya?" A low voice whispered to his ear."I am curious though. Whose names do you remember?"
Upon feeling the low voice on his ear the boy swirled towards her. Of course she made her way from across the closet to sit with him, just so she can spite him.
He didn't answered her, just squinted his eyes at her. She was getting on his nerves really. All the crazy talk didn't help his situation and now she was popping up everywhere.She was an easy target to get out all his frustration and ire."What the fuck?"
She titled her head looking at him."You know in the comics you are made out to be such a sweetheart. From up close you are more like an asshole"
"Fuck off then."he shrugged, curiosity peeked. Sweetheart? Him? That writer ought to get his eyes checked. He maybe had more of baby face, but that meant nothing. It was the freckles, he decided.
"Nah, assholes are more my type" he let out a huff at her flirty commend. It had been months, a year top, since he was last hit on and she was cute. Too bad she was batshit crazy. "You can't remember his name because he doesn't have one" she resumed.
"What?"he questioned ,startled.
"He is an extra, unlike you he doesn't have a set up. He doesn't need a name, he is just there to fill the empty space." She said picking dirty from her nails.
"Everyone has a name" he refuted, leaning towards her to whisper in her ear. If someone heard them talking they would be deemed as lunatics and thrown out to the zombies together.
"Name someone besides your friend group and me"she tutted.
"Hyunjin,Minho, Seungmin..you want me to continue?" He sassed, relaxing more on the bench he had stationed himself.
"You don't consider them part of your group?"she asked, an odd expression on her face.
"We're not that close" he simply answered. They seemed that way? I mean, sure they hang out but if he was made to chose someone to go to with a secret Changbin and Jisung would be it for him. They were the most understanding and kind people he knew.
"Huh" she seemed lost in her thoughts.
"What?" He asked again
"Nothing"she answered "Anyway, don't you want me to show you the proof you asked for? If you come with me tonight I will show you"
He was suspicious. Things always got messy when she appeared "Where are we going?"
"To show you the comic,of course" she smiled mischievously.
"But where?"
"You'll see"
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~
When Felix opened his eyes darkness greeted him.
Of course it had to be in the middle of the night,he grumbled. Even though he didn't like the events taking place right now he quietly got up, taking extra care as to not wake up Jisung or any of the others sleeping soundly on the floor. The old oil lamp provided the only source of light to help him make his way to the front door. But if he prided himself on something it was how agile he was. Minho once compared him to a cat and even though he would like something more..regal he appreciated the compliment.
Tippy toeing to the front between the masses of bodies was a piece of cake and soon Felix was closing the door behind him and walking down the hallway. The halls were totally empty, which was an understatement. It still didn't sit right with him to see them empty, though. They usually were filled with ex-students talking and laughing, now the large windows casted an airily glow that creeped him out. He shook his head, deciding to hurry. As soon as he hit the last step he saw you laying down on top of the desk, mere meters from the patched up door that almost went down the other day.
"Do you do anything besides laying down?" He said announcing his presence as he went to stand over her head, flicking her lightly on the forehead
She immediately opened her eyes, hands flying to the spot he hit and craned her neck to look at him. "I lay down as often as I can. I don't know about you, but I am not athlete material and this damn world keeps me in my toes"
He hummed softly. "Where are going?"
She righted herself on the desk and hoped down, bouncing energetically on her feet. "Follow me, grumpy pants"
She made a bee line to the window on the right side of the room, opening it and jumping outside. Fortunately the height was not too much for them, so they easily landed in the back area of the school, back when he first caught a glimpse of her.
"Now we have to climb through that window"she pointed to a ground floor window, similar to the one they just exited. "Once we are in,we just take the stairs to the second floor and turn left and into the library we go!"she word-vomited, unable to stop herself it seemed. She was way too talkative for such late hour.
"Do you always talk that much?"he wondered as be followed her. She ignored him as she drew closer to the window. She stood still for a second,before muttering something under her breath. She started to walk away from the wall, skipping down the back yard, a loud noice was heard and soon after she come back with a chair in her arms.
"I swear every time!" She exaggerated.
"What?"he asked, as she placed the chair under the half open window.
She stepped on the chair, pushing the heavy window open bit by bit. "When a scene take place, everything that happened on shadow goes back to their original place, so I have to keep carrying the chair back here. It's really annoying " she glanced at him, noticing his confused appearance and explained. "For example, let's say you injury yourself in the shadow.. it won't appear in the scene because the writer didn't mean to write that but if it happens on the scene it's permanent" the window was completely open by the time she finished her sentence,giving her the chance to jump inside.
Once she jumped into the building she stuck her head outside and shouted "Your turn!"
So he injured himself in the shadow when he scratched himself on the nails? Was that why the wound disappeared overnight?He climbed on the rusty old chair and easily followed her steps. In mere seconds he stood beside her in the opposite side of the school.
He was starstruck. The school was.. pristine. That was the exact word that described it. The little furniture that the hall held, such as bookcases and a couple of lockers, were in their normal positions -completely dust and damage free. From the side of his eye he could see the cafeteria were the same applied. The lunch tables and all of their chairs were stacked neatly against each other like waiting for thousand of kids to sit on them and happily eat away the awful cafeteria lunch.
She was examinating him as he looked around "Weird,huh?" She asked him, his confusion and awe all over his face.
"Why is the place like that? It is overrunned by zombies. It should have been total chaos in here" he asked as he turned around and around to catch all the little details.
"Because the writer didn't have a need to write it destroyed. My guess is that he needed a model of a school and that is why that part exists. He technically doesn't need to write this part, but it would be weird not to exist and ta da!!" She exclaimed, jumping light and using flashy jazz hands.
"Huh.." he marveled, coming back to her side.
"Ready?" He nodded at her and they started to climb the stairs quietly.
He had a million things he wanted to ask, still only half believing her. He looked at her back and decided to speak up "How did you figured out?That it was safe I mean?"
She reflected on the question and answered "It was a month in the comic, after the virus spread. I started to hear noises, time flew right by and I started to get strong headaches..Much like you did."she cocked her head in his direction as she naturally took a left turn to head to the library. "Then it started coming up to me. The truth. Memories. Flashes from the past. And that was it."
He paused, legs feeling weaker than usual. He grabbed her arm before she could open the double door that lead to the library."What do you mean flashes from the past?"
She looked at him over her shoulder, a secretive smile on her face "You didn't think that was my first rodeo, right?" She said voice enigmatic and dark, as she pushed the door open.
The library stayed the same. That was his first thought. The room had a high ceiling making it appear enormous,tall rows of bookcases stretched all over the place, making almost like a labyrinth. The wooden floor and cozy little spots made it more comfortable and warm despite it's intimidating size. In the middle of the room was a small circle, where students could study and lazy around. It was like a day hadn't passed.
Y/N flew from beside him and headed over the fiction section, searching for something. He followed her as he did most of the evening. She had started talking before he even reached her.
"The comic book appears here every time..Not the same place everything time though. I tried to take it with me but it won't stay. It just disappears. It's like a treasure hunt every time!" She said, giggling. She was passing rows and rows of books, making sure her hand is brushing every one of them.
"You said that is not your first rodeo. What does that mean?"he asked carefully.
Without pausing her stride she answered "I have been in other comics before, the writer likes to use characters from his past books. Lazy bastard. I have been in a college comics. In a mafia one too! Was never the lead though " she murmured the last part.
Meanwhile Felix didn't know what to say. So this meant she had lived at least 3 lives before this one?
"So have we met before?" He wondered.
"Don't think so..I would have definitely remembered you"she stated, making him flush. Red splotches were sprawled all over his face and neck he was sure. It wasn't that he hadn't heard a compliment before, but the way she said she would surely remember him without much explanation hinting he was special enough to be remembered.. he was strangely touched.
"Here it is!" She exclaimed, jumping up, steadying herself on the lowest shelf and stretching to catch a thin book.She looked at him and cocked her head to the studying area in the middle of the library.
She reached the desk that was near them and made herself comfortable on top of the desk, instead of a chair. She placed the book beside her and waved him closer. He took a seat in the chair in front at the book and looked at it, a snort leaving him immediately.
"Deadly love?" He questioned, reading the title.
"I Know!!!"she yelped, throwing her hands in the air.
It was small, barely larger than his hand and it's color was black with splatters of red. Blood, he realized. He slowly opened the first page and sketches of familiar faces greeted him. The drawing of Hyunjin and the new girl was the first thing that caught his eye. A few notable info under their sketches, along with their names. In the page next to them he saw his name, along with his friend's and acquaintance's names. He ran his fingers over his own drawing.
Lee Felix. 18. Friend of Hyunjin, the favorite of the group, a total sweetheart.
That was it. His whole being summed up in those meaningless words. Rage filled him but he clenched his teeth and suppressed it. Now wasn't the time for that. He turned a page and an other page and an another and an another. Words had left him, numbness had taken over.
He turned his head towards Y/N, waiting for some guidance or comforting words. He was not sure what look he was displaying but as soon as he turned her hand found home in his shoulder rubbing it soothingly.
"It's gonna be okay." She muttered voice light and warm, just like that time at the roof. He signed as he brought his hands on his face, rubbing it roughly before regaining control.
He continued to flip the pages, his fingers brushing against the scenes in which he took part in. He could recognize quite a few events, the scenes which contained the romance between hyunjin and his girl he did not care to read. But what caught his attention was the scenes with you and from the enemy camp. You weren't in many scenes and those you were in, he almost didn't recognize you. You always wore a sneer and pretty much bullying the fuck out of the poor main lead. It was a struck difference between the you, who he saw in the paper and the you, who was looking at him right now. As for enemy camp... the whole plan laid before him and he didn't know what to do with this information.
"We have to tell someone, do something!" he protested, glancing up to your figure that was reading along. You were unusually quiet, a far away look in your brown eyes that unsettled him greatly.
"What would you like to do?"Y/N asked, leaning her weight on her hands that were against the desk casually.
"We have to tell Chan! We have to kick her out of her and move our camp!"he yelled, unable to hold his temper in check.
"Very valid points. Do it" she challenged, a airy smile on her face. She suddenly leaned closer to him,face very close to his person, from her place on the desk she looked almost menacing. She almost looked like her book self.
"Why do I sense a but?"he groaned, exaggerated at this point.
"They won't listen. You could tell them everything and they won't by the next scene. It is an unfortunate catch of the comic." She hopped down from the desk and she stated circling around him. "Okay, quiz time!"
He looked at her with a look that said really, but she nodded.
"Shadow!"
He let out a long breath and kicked lightly his feet like a fretful child but answered her question nonetheless. "We have free will, can do whatever we want"
She pumped her fists in the air and with a voice of a bad show presenter she shouted "Correct! What is the noise you hear?"
"Umm.." he got nothing to show there.
"Eeech! Incorrect! That the sound of a scene starting. Haven't you noticed you are saying things you don't mean and want when you hear the sounds?" She grabbed the book from his hands and and flipped through stopping at a familiar scene."This is the scene where Hyunjin tells you about his feelings. You said that you are not close with him, but here you are consoling him. Why? Because the writer made you do it."
Felix stared the scene before him. It was true that he cared little about such things and he didn't understand the need he had that moment to console him. Was it truly everything a lie? Was such a puppet to the writer?
"Don't be sad Lixie! We have each other now!" She said throwing an arm around his shoulders, rubbing her cheek against him.
He right away unwinded her arm from his person and pushed her lightly away. "I don't know you."
"We can get to know each other. Something tells me that we will be great friends." she beamed at him, still not shying away from him.
"Why are you so happy all the time? We are ,like, dying"he wondered, making himself comfortable on the chair.
"My set up is a minor villain as you saw. I am always a bitch on the scenes I am in. Got tired of frowning all the time. You probably won't remember me in the scenes but I always bully the new girl, I am a lackey to Mina.. you know short black hair ? Frowning all the time? Loud as fuck?"
"Yeah I somewhat remember her..but not you.."he mumbled the last part, hoping she wouldn't hear.
"Don't sweat it, I am an extra.I am even lucky to get a name" she cackled settling down again,this time beside him."So what you wanna do now? Should I bring other comics?" She asked hopefully.
He though about arguing with her, but he had nothing better to do."Let me come with you. I don't trust your taste"
"Romance not your taste Lixie?" She teasingly mocked, looking him through her lashes.
He rolled his eyes and made his way to the fiction section.
She giggled and followed him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~
The next few weeks were way more fun than the 6 months he spend here.
He was way calmer now that he was sure he wasn't losing it. He also was more calm with the whole zombie situation. In the past he jumped at the slightest noise, he was ready to bolt at the drop of a hat. He was scared for his life. Now he laid at the roof, gazing at the horizon. It was funny how things changed.
Over the past weeks he had gotten a lot closer with Y/N. Unwillingly, he would always claim and she would always smile. During the lunch breaks they would always sneak to the library to lazy around and read some comics. They tried to turn on some devices, Y/N insisting that some may work. A waste of time that was. But he learned that she enjoyed some gaming back in the days, not as much as he did but it would be nice to play together. He wondered what Fortnite would be with her, probably a lot of shouting from him and uncontrollable giggles from her as she messed up. They would always brave the other side of the school as well, finding a lot of lost things in the process. He had discovered a ton of clothes laying around, knifes laying around in the kitchen of the cafeteria, which he tried to sneak over to the other side. All in vain as they were gone by the morning. Y/N had discovered an old radio in the library, probably older than both of them combined, and she had the damn thing blasting all day long. He had tried to throw that blasted thing away only for it to show up in it's place the next noon. While Y/N was happy..him? Not so much... especially cause she turned it even higher in volume, dancing around rhythmically to its beats, causing him a headache, which she quoted was totally deserved. They had discovered cards and board games as well, making the time pass easier. She had found some old pencils and markers in some drawer and had insisted that he would be her model, saying it was her dream once to become an artist. One look at the final result had Felix reaching over and tearing apart the caricature she had drawn, not minding her cries of protest."It gives me the creeps"he had said to her and he was being truthful! She wasn't cut to be an artist in the slightest, after that attempt she had for shaken drawing in favor of other skills.
A loud noise shook him out of his thoughts. He slowly turned around to see a familiar face enter the rooftop.
"Hey Mina..I can handle your shift for today..I know you are tired these days, why don't you take a rest?" Y/N sweetly proposed, leaning forward with earnest eyes pined on the other girl.
"Y/N!! I kinda am, now that you mentioned it" Mina said stretching her sore muscles. "You are such a sweetheart for thinking of me. Thanks dear" she said heading towards the door,sending a flying kiss her way on the way. "Well!..Have fun!"
"I intend to" Y/N said, wolfishly. She turned to him, already wearing a chesire smile on her face. "Oh Lixie! Look what I have here!" She extended her hand towards him. An pack of Uno cards in her grasp.
He titled his head and paused. "You agreed to change shifts just to paly Uno with me?" He asked, incredulously.
"What can I say? I was bored" she shrugged, having already crossed the distance and foldings the cards. "You wanna go first or should I?"
He rolled his eyes as he settled down as well. "You go"
"I must warn you though. I am a pro"she challenged, raising her eyebrow.
"We shall see"he returned.
Three games later and he still had to won. He threw his head back, a scream bubbling in his throat. "You-you are cheating!"he accused, aggressively pointing at her.
"No I am not! Now take your six cards like a man!" She protested, eyes sparkling with victory.
He groaned as he went to draw six more cards-
Blink.
Swoosh!
"Okay guys, here's the plan."
A couple of students were gathered in the teacher's office. He couldn't get used to this feeling now that he knew what it is. A scene was starting. His gaze darted around taking everything in. He recognized several faces, Chan's, Minho's, Mina's, Spy girl's and finally yours. You looked so different now though. You had that look he only catch a glimpse of in the comic book. Five minutes before your eyes were glistening, you were laughing carefree as you were whooping his ass at Uno. Now your eyes were focused and aggressive, a frown marrying your pretty face, your hair pulled back and your arms crossed. You were ready for battle. Then he realized why. Of course. The supplies. Minho mentioned that they were running dangerously low.
"We will go to the second floor today. Our goal is mainly canned food. If you can find packaged bread, it's fine too. Y/N and Mina you take the first floor, we have scanned it already but see if you can find some more medicine." Chan explained. Short and to the point as always. "You ready? All got your tools?" He received nods from all around.
Before he could say anything or catch your gaze-
Swoosh!
They stood before the market already. He wanted to turn and look at you, but his face stayed turned straight, his knuckles turning white from his fierce grip on his knife.
Chan turned and pointed to the entrance. Words were a threat right now, not a friend. All together they started to enter the building. It once was a market place filled with everything you could imagine from painkillers to furniture, now it was all past glory. Half the lights were shut or shattered making the place plunged in darkness, the rows of shelves were half-empty or cluttered from the many hands that went through them. Many products were on the floor, some opened and thrown away in it's previous owner's hurry, making the stench so strongly that a few of them had to place a cloth over their nose. Quickly they ascended the stairs, his vision of the girls downstairs gone. He had a bad feeling, he didn't want to be there for a second more but his feet wouldn't listen to him. So even though he wanted to stop and run the other way, he continued searching rows and rows of products.
Four minutes in, he had his bag full and was ready to go. Now he thought about it, this must be the work of the writer- a never ending of supplies abandoned super market. But the run here was too uneventful. He tapped Chan on the shoulder, jerking his head towards the staircase. The older male nodded as well and hand-gestured the rest of the team to follow. When they were in the middle of the staircase a loud noise alerted them and the inhuman grunt that followed filled them with even more dread. Running as fast and noiseless as they could, they made bee line to the exit. That's when the thought popped up in his head.
No! Y/N is still in there! He willed his feet to stop running, to turn the other way but they failed him miserably. His breath started coming quicker than normal, his palms sweating. He had to find a way in! But the damn scene wasn't ending! From the side of his eye, he saw a lone petite figure darting towards the direction of the other girls. But that was the last thing he saw before his traitorous feet carried him outside. As soon as they were outside Chan shouted" The girls" and started to make his way inside yet again but Minho, ever the strategist, stopped him by shaking his head.
"It's too late now Chan"he whispered, already closing the large doors sealing them inside, making them safe and sealing the girls' fate.
No..no! This couldn't be happening, would he lose her? He couldn't lose her... Panic choked him, tears sprung to his eyes and his damned feet still wouldn't move! He closed his eyes, shoulders dropping waiting for the known sound to end the scene so he could fall apart.
"Hurry! Come on! Come on!" A feminine voice yelled, sounds of feet stomping to them was the only other sound be heard.
"You escaped!" Chan said, slumping with relief.
He turned to look at them.
All of you reached them,out of breath and clutching each other tightly as you answered like one, but the noise was too loud for them to hear. Felix couldn't believe the relief that he felt. You were there, albeit dirty,sweaty and nearly slumped over from the exhaustion but you were there-safe.
"I saw the zombie going to them! So I threw an cup or whatever that was near me to the opposite side. The zombie got distracted by the sounds and forgot about us. We heard the door closing so we hid in the back room and we escaped from the window there." Spy Girl said.
"Thank you..You saved us"Mina said, you nodding repeatedly from beside her, still visibly trembling.
"I did what anyone would do" she replied, rocking on her heels with a big smile on her face.
Swoosh!
Felix felt like he could finally breath. He couldn't wait until they were alone. "Y/N!" He dived immediately to her,cradling her face in his hands. After a good look on her face, he run his hands across her trying to find fault. "You okay?Are you hurt?" His hands roamed all over her, not wanting to hurt her but still wanting to check. They settled on her forearms shaking her lightly. "Y-Y/N?" He asked again when he didn't get an answer. He grinded his teeth, getting impatient.
"I am fine Lixie." She willed herself to respond. But he saw her, her skin was ashen and her eyes filled with unreleased tears. He wanted to comfort her first, but his feelings got the best of him.
"What the fuck! You could have gotten killed! Why didn't you tried to run?!" He spatted at her, tightening his hands on her for a moment before letting her go. He stayed close, too close for comfort but not close enough for his. He run his hands through his hair, tugging it roughly. He couldn't stay still, body filled with adrenaline.
She lowered her head, staring at her feet. Totally avoiding eye contact. "For the same reason you didn't come back to help" she whispered back. That, right there, was a stab right at his heart. He kept quiet out of frustration. He wanted to help, he sweared he did but his feet were nailed to the ground!
She looked at him through her lashes, shoulder hitting him gently. "I am fine. Really"
She offered a smile, more shaky and uncertain than her usually cheeky a d mischievous one, but he would take what he could get.
Wordlessly he snaked his hand over her shoulders, cuddling her to his side. He couldn't get over this feeling that washed over him, he needed her near right now. Only she could make the bad feeling go away.
"Eeeh... shall we go back now that everyone is here?" Chan proposed. Everyone eagerly nodded their consent and rushed to get away from the store.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~
They barely made it inside when everyone flew off, the scene no longer binding them together until they were the only ones in the hall. Felix tugged her hand, that he now realized he never had let go of, cocking his head towards the window. Y/N paused for a moment before nodding and following him.
After helping her get out of the window, he went to find the stupid chair that kept disappearing.It was out of habit now, the drill between them known for a while. They climbed in silently and made their way up together. He didn't like the silence, he got so used to her talking a mile a minute. Now she was out of words it seemed, and that alone scared him. He let go of her hand that he had grabbed yet again without his knowledge and pushed the double doors open. The library seemed especially inviting today. Warm sunlight showering every corner of the place, wooden floors almost shinning in response to the exposure. They had left several pieces of clothing over the time but they kept disappearing so the place was too clean for his taste. He ushered her in the middle and made her take a sit in a chair in front of him. He awkwardly crouched before her wanting to look at her.
"Hey" he whispered, reaching a hand to pull her hair away from her face. He placed his hand against her cheek turning her head lightly to him. She was still shaken up. His other hand found way to her thigh rubbing soothing circles to calm her down. "You are okay now Y/N"
Her only response was a nod as she stared off to space. She looked at him, but not really.
"Do you wanna talk about it?" He continued, still running soothingly circles over her leg.
She swallowed thickly before opening her mouth. "I thought I was done for Felix. I t-thought my time was u-up." She said, still looking off to space.
"Look at me" Felix whispered, guiding her face to his. He placed his forehead against her and closed his eyes, hoping this would ground her as much it grounded him."You are here. With me. Nothing bad happened. You are here"he repeated, feeling her rigid body calm a bit, shoulders slumping and hearing her repeat "with you" made something snap in him.
Maybe it was the fear he felt today at the thought that he lost her , maybe it was the thought what would he do in this place without her and her company keeping him warm or maybe it was how beautiful she looked with her flushed cheeks and red bitten lips but he felt that if he didn't feel them on his right that second he would explode.
"Y/N..."he breathed out. Maybe it was his tone or the way his breath caught up she seemed to realize what he wanted. Because now that her watery eyes opened they met his longing stare and fleeted down to his half open lips.
He hesitated as he cradled her face, angling her face to his own. But the bashful smile on her face and her already closed eyes spurred him to lean forward and close the distance between their lips. He gently pressed his mouth to her, just a gentle warm touch. She tasted fresh like running water and something entire her and he was immediately sold. Their lips brushed against each other slowly, dancing to their own tempo until he felt her tongue on his lip, asking him to deepen their kiss, which he gladly accepted. They mouths classed perfectly, her hands were embracing him pulling him closer and he was in turn caressing every inch he could get hold of. Her cold hands gently touched his neck and chin causing him to shudder and her to smile. She broke away to take a much needed breath and looked at him, wearing that heart-stopping smile. She suddenly jumped into his arms, making him lose balance and fall to the hard wood floor. Any other day he would have been pissed, now he laughed wholeheartedly as he trapped her in his embrace . She signed with content and hide her face in the crook of his neck.
"Can we stay like that for a while?"
"As long as you would like,love"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~
A few more weeks passed filled with laughter and secret rendezvous. Their days were mostly spend in the library chilling. They would lazy around ,reading or playing cards. Felix quickly learned that you were too good of a player. Experience- you claimed from the days were you would gamble away in the mafia world. You had also gotten your hands upon some crafts books you wanted to try drawing skills long forgotten,but the result was hundreds paper cranes floating around the library. He had tried to join you but after 3 disfigured cranes, he decided that he had had enough choosing instead to lay there as you crafted away. His favourite past time thought would be the time you spend in each other's embrace,kissing away the anxiety and loving each other. Funny, he thought, I didn't think I would be as open to affection as Y/N was. There was not a minute he wasn't touching you in some way that would be either a arm thrown over your shoulders or placed on your waist or simply his lips against yours. You were inseparable.
You didn't even separate in sleep. Y/N would always end up in his blanket, either she was there talking with him and his friends and she would simply doze off there or she would be in the door with her own blanket waiting for someone to let her in, just like an oversized puppy. The first few times Changbin and Jisung threw some questioning looks at him but after a few days they welcomed you in just as often. They even remembered your name after using so much time in the shadow.
Right now you were laying side by side on the library floor, the sun warming your figures, almost lulling you to sleep.At least one of you.
"Lixiee" a whiny voice penetrates his eardrum. He ignored said voice with the hope of catching some sleep."Lixie I know you're not sleeping." She said drawing closer, half laying on top of him
"How?"he said not bothering to open his eyes. He was so relaxed right now that every small movement was a promise of pain.
"You snore when you sleep" she sassed back, now poking at his ribs.
"I do not snore"he protested lazily,finally turning his head to look at her laying in his arms all snuggly and adorable.
"Made you look through"she said, playing with his T shirt sleeve.
He half laughed half signed. He laid his head back down staring blankly at the ceiling. "What you wanted?" he asked, raising an arm to caress her hair.
"I found a book-" he groaned without hearing the rest "you didn't even let me finish!" She jokingly protested, mirth dancing in her brown eyes.
He stopped faking his death to let her finish her sentence. "I found a book about dancing-" on que he started to groan louder.
"Ohh come on! We didn't held any dances before this whole fiasco started"she protested, crossing her arms and adoring a pout on her face.
Felix looked at her being all pouty for a dance. He turned on his side, jutting out his arms to support his weight. "What kind of dance?" he asked out of curiosity.
Her eyes immediately light up. She turned the book to him showing off a page of a pair-
"Waltzing!" She cried out, grinning
He looked at the page. He could waltz.. it was just staying in place and twirling her around. His eyes fleeted to hers, watching her practically vibrate. "Okay" he agreed.
She let out a small cry, kissing him swiftly and darted from her seat on the floor in search of something. A beat later he heard a melody playing in the background. The radio. A melancholic yet passionate tone was swirling in the air now, the sun was hitting just right and Y/N approaching him with graceful strides and a sweet smile on her face made Felix feel fuzzy and warm inside.
"Can I have this dance, kind sir?" She lightly bowed, stretching her hand out to him. She looked at him through her lashes, eyes filled with stars and smile with mischief.
He let out a happy puff of air "Well of course" he stood up and pulled her close, placing his hand on her waist. She stepped even closer,not an inch separating their bodies, placed her hand on his shoulder and whispered "To my left". And they started waltzing. Their first circle was kind of awkward as they didn't know what exactly they were doing, but as the second circle rolled in they were gliding across the wooden floor more smoothly. The sound of Waltz no. 2 that filling the air covered their delighted giggles and accompanied their longing gazes.
She never looked more beautiful than right now, he thought. Darks eyes locked on his, never breaking contact, her hands that were always running a few degrees colder than his,were pulling him closer,now thrown over his shoulder playing with his hair. Her own glossy dark hair were swaying around her, caressing him as they moved around. She looked adorable with her white tee and great sweatpants that she clutched like an evening gown. He was beyond happy in this moment. The world may be damned, but he felt a new kind of hope now.
He suddenly grabbed her by the waist , hosting her up in the air and twirled her around. She was startled for a moment , before throwing her head back and let out a loud laugh. He carefully set her down and as the song drew to its peak and great ending, he dipped her gently.
Her brown eyes were half closed, her pupils dilated and lips half open inviting him in. He dipped even further and closed the distance between them kissing her with all he got. All the emotion he felt in that moment convened in the pressing of his lips and tightening of his hands around her.
He eventually let go of her lips to get some necessary air into his lungs. Eyes still closed as savoring the moment ,they righted their postures. They didn't let go of each other right away, just stood there gazing at each other's eyes. She tip toed to press a lingering kiss on his lips "That was fun" she said, rocking back and forth in his arms "we should do it more often"
"As you wish, my lady" he whispered leaned in for more sweet kisses.
~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~
Swoosh!
As soon as Felix gained consciousness he was sure of 3 things. Firstly, that awful sound in his ears is the sound of a scene starting, secondly, even if he couldn't move his head to check, he was sure you weren't beside him sleeping as he last remembered and thirdly, something very bad was happening.
"Guys! We got to go! We are under attack! Get up, we got to go!" An alarmed Hyunjin that moments before burst into the room, shouted, shaking unconscious students awake with force.
"Who is attacking us?!" Changbin asked in a horrified stupor.
Hyunjin threw a glance over his shoulder to a girl half hidden behind him."I will explain later. Now we got to hurry!" He said already taking off to wake the others.He unwillingly got up and followed suit. He ran to the closest classrooms, waking up other unsuspecting students all the while trying to catch a glimpse of you. Panic had taken over everyone,the entire school was up and running but that was nothing until they heard the sounds of engines running. He threw himself against the nearest window and watch with horror as enormous car decorated with spikes and wire netting tore it's way through the front gates, letting the enemy in as well as dozens upon dozens of zombies.
A arm grabbed his own and for a moment he thought that the scene was over and you were grabbing him trying to get him away from the horrors. But the hope fell through as Changbin shouted his name and for him to focus. He continued running not knowing where he was going. He was starting to panic as well he didn't know what would they do and more importantly he didn't know where you where. None of the students he helped were you. He knew that your classroom when you didn't sleep with him was on this floor so logically you would be safe..
But the panic he felt before was nothing compared to the one he was feeling now as he heard the screams that accompanied the gunshots. He exchanged a petrified look with Changbin and they run."What is happening?" He screamed, feeling helpless.
"I don't know man, just run!"he yelled, clearly as overwhelmed as he felt.
"Felix! Changbin!" A yelp was heard from behind them. As soon as they turned they spotted Chan running to them. "An enemy camp has invaded ours. They have guns and they are killing everyone that crosses their eyes. Hyunjin told to gather you all in the roof that-that the government is going to pick us up,that they are looking for survivors!Try to avoid anyone strange looking...and don't go on the first floor.Please" he said.The next second he threw himself at us, clutching us tight. "I will see you on the roof. But... "He trailed off looking as if he couldn't keep in the tears.
"Go. We will be right behind you" Changbin said returning the hug. Felix clutching him just as tight. He looked at them one last time and sped off.
Swoosh!
Finally!
Felix was ready to take off. He had wasted precious time already in this fucking bullshit, he cared enough for Chan to appreciate this small moment, but he needed to find you. He took a total of 3 steps before an arm wrapped around his.
"What?" he snapped, almost seeing red.
Changbin didn't move an inch."Where the fuck you going Felix?"
"I have to find Y/N"he said trying to break free from the boy"I-I have to find her!"he shouted
"We have to get to the roof"Changbin said, determinated. Felix managed to shrugged him off, adrenaline coursing through his veins.
"You go first. I..I can't leave without her Binnie" he begged him, the desperation on his face evident. The older boy took a step back, a stern expression on his face that Felix hasn't associated with him. "Don't fight a losing battle" he warned "I will wait for you upstairs. I will wait for you man" he finally said , quickly hugging him once again and turned around, disappearing in the dark.
As soon as Changbin left his sight , he run. He jogged all around the place, hiding himself at the slightest sound. He was brave enough to do this for you, he reminded himself. The fear of a bullet through his brain was not enough to hold him back.So he continued running, his eyes missing nothing. He met a lot of students, terrified and trembling on different corners of the school so he explained as fast as he could and sent them on their way. But there was no sign of you. He checked everywhere,on the teacher's office,on the janitor's closet, on every classroom...that left him with only one opinion.
He rocked on his heels, trussing his hair before making the decision. You were worth the risk, so as quietly he could he went down the stairs.
As he made his way down the first thing that hit was the stench. Copper and gun fire. The second thing he noticed was that no one was there except fallen bodies. Tears sprung to his eyes. He knew this people, he talked to them hours before and now they were lifeless masses on the floor because of a massacre. He swallowed and made himself look at their faces. No sign of you but this time he was relieved. "Y/N!" He whispered-shouted, scanning the place once again.
"Fe-Felix!" A voice called out, weak, barely managing to speak up so he can notice. But he noticed, he swung his head to the direction of their window. He run so fast he didn't notice the trail of blood he run through, until he jumped out of the window and he saw you.
You were laying just beside the window, clearly not having any more strength to pull yourself further away, looking like a total mess. Your hair disheveled beyond saving, skin ashen almost a sickly white, your lips that were usually smiling were twisted in a grimace, but you were alive.
"Y/N!" He couldn't stop himself he immediately threw his hands around you, holding you tight but your response was one he didn't expect. A loud pained groan left your lips ,your whole body tensing. "Y-Y/N?" He stuttered, feeling lost. Until he saw the way you held yourself, the dried blood in your chin and lips ,but most importantly the flesh blood that was pooling in your stomach region.
"Why are you here,love?" She asked placing a cold hand on his cheek, caressing him lovingly. "You are supposed to be on the roof from what I heard"
"I came to get you.Come on hang on to me, I can carry you up. Come on" he said, trying to place her hand around a his shoulders, but he only felt her tense more, pain filling her. He tried to snake his hands under her legs and host her up but it ended the same.
"Lixie-"she started but he shushed her. He tried to collect her in his arms again, but he could feel how heavy her body was, how she couldn't control her movements.
"No!No no no no!No!" He chanted, as he capped her face "You have to get up, we have to get out together! I will dance with you every day! I will play cards with you! I will cook for you!You won't have to do anything! Just" he sobbed, tears he could no longer hold now were freely flowing. " Just stay with me. Please Y/N"he cried, willing her to live with him.
"Felix,look at me" she breathed. He shook his head, burrowing his head in the crook of your neck, hugging you, breathing you in. He felt your lips at his temple and your weak arms wrapping themselves around him. "I will try to remember you in our next life. I will remember you." She promised. He pulled himself back and gave her a tearful smile.
"And I will remember you, my love. I will remember you" he promised and leaned down to connect their lips one last time.
Swoosh!
He blinked.
He was on a helicopter, looking down at the school along with some of the others. He recognized Chan and Minho, who were going from person to person trying to reassure and comfort. He spotted Jisung and Changbin close by him, Hyunjin and his girl huddled in a corner clutching each other but he turned away , not standing the sigh of them. He turned his attention to the school below him. Now a graveyard for the fallen ones. A place that will always remind us of our loved ones.
Tears filled his vision.
Goodbye my love , he thought. I will find you again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~
Swoosh!
Blinding lights was the first thing he saw. Music was the first thing he heard. Something heavy on his person was the first thing he felt.
He opened his eyes and he was in awe.
They first thing he did was look down only to see a heavy armor surrounding him. It was all silver metal with gold finishings. A sword was fastened in the armor, he was sure it weighted the same amount as him, if it wasn't even heavier.Then he looked up to see where he was.
A palace. He was in a real life palace. It was pristine. White walls with golden details engraved in complicated designs stretched over the walls. The ceiling was high up, so the enormous golden chandelier had more room to extend all over the people dancing. They all glided so gracefully on the marble floor as thought they didn't touch it.
Every girl was dressed in long regal dresses which when they moved on the dance floor twirled around them making them look like fairies, every man had a three piece suit and while they were magnificent they looked like the belonged in a medieval play. All had adored masks, some were more plain but still painfully beautiful with golden or silver details, others had chosen more bold colours with feathers and glittery dust decorating them. He could spot figures with plainer clothes and simple masks carrying traits and drinks. Servants,he thought. With an other quick look around he spotted men dressed in the same silver armor he wore.
Upon a elevated space was a seat fit for a king. On its sides sat two smaller seats,not less regal. All had crimson cushions and gold details as well. Gold must be their thing,he thought. Two tall guards stood behind the thrones wearing an even heavier armor than his.
Great. Zombie apocalypse first, now Arthur and the round table. Excellent.
He leaned against the wall he was by and gazed at the crowd. He didn't see anyone he knew as he didn't know what was he supposed to do here.
He didn't much attention to his surrounding until he felt a presence stop before him.
"Can I have this dance, kind sir?" a melodious voice echoed.
He pinned her with his eyes "Y/N?" Voice lashed with doubt he called her.
A black mask with silver details hide her face, but he could recognize that eyes. He would never forget those eyes.
He looked at her. Not believing that she stood before him, alive and well.He stared with vigor trying to erase the last memory of her bleeding at the ground and burn this one to his memory.
A silver tiara sat on top of glossy brown hair that were curled to perfection, her face although hidden by the mask was alluring completed by a set of rubby red lips. Her gown was amazing black velvet and tulle were wrapped around her in a perfect balance. If the other girls looked fairies, she looked like a queen. A dark queen of vengeance.
"The one and only" she smirked, extending her hand. In his stupor he took it and stepped in the dance floor with her. She placed her right hand on his shoulders, fingers immediately starting to play with his hair and left hand placed in his. He tightened his arms around her in a daze.
"You are here" the stupid smile didn't leave his face. She was here, her cold hands clutching his and looking him like he hung the stars. "I am so sor-"
"Lixie shhh. No. None of that. We are here. Together" they circled the dance floor twice by now and whispers started to arise, following them as they started their third round.
"Together" he agreed.
"What is going on here?" He lowered his head placing on top of hers. She hid her face on his neck, placing a sweet kiss there making him flush.
"You are my knight in shining armor" she sung. "You are in for a surprise, knight"
"What?"he leaned back to take a good look at her. She smiled and opened her mouth-
Swoosh!
He was back by the wall in what he assumed was his post. As soon as the scene started trumpets started playing announcing the entrance of the royal family. First entered the king, the tall man with a golden crown on his head had no mask for he had no need for it. He was the king you could see it in the way he moved. Second entered the queen, a beautiful woman that age hadn't touched yet. She was the epitome of grace. And lastly entered the princess-
Y/N?!
Her figure glad in all black gazed at the crowd with boredom and disinterest. She swept the dance floor who had frozen in their spots upon the entrance, over the guests. Her gaze caught his own for a brief moment her intense gaze piercing him. She lightly squinted her eyes at him and gave him a hint of a smile, then she was gone. She climbed on the marble pondium along with her parents' and sat on the left plush throne by her father. She got comfortable on her chair, took a glass of wine and observed.
Quite some time passed and while Felix didn't always look at your side, everytime he did he met your stare. You looked at him like a cat that was looking at their milk, if it was anyone else he would be uncomfortable but he was actually enjoying your attention. He could get used to having scenes with you.
Clink clink!
The king stood up, clinking his goblet earning everyone's attention."My dear subjects! We have gathered here today to celebrate my daughter's birthday. This year as she is turning eighteen she will be choosing a husband to take! And he is here tonight!" His voice echoed throughout the ballroom. Husband? A shot of fear passed through him. We would have to antagonize a husband now?
"I shall go to him now,father. To my future husband and king. He shall be the only one I marry" a snarky voice was heard. And a blackened figure aroused.
She started to make her way through the crowd, everyone parting to make way for the future queen. A black dream through and through. Her black heels echoed as she walked and walked. Her figure was nearing him, he could see her face now, smirk intact, figure straight with pride and experience he was sure. Thoughts were swirling in his head until her figure stopped before him. Now his head was empty, empty of all except her.
"He will be my husband" she said, manicured hand pointing straight at him.
She smiled at him as hush whispers surrounded.
While on the outer side he wore a shocked expression,he smiled back from the inside and he was sure she knew.
He could get used to this comic, he thought.
Jealousy Jealousy
Felix x fem!reader
Category: angst, fluff
Just wanted to make a one-shot short story
Love you all!
xoxo
Rachel
(by the way, mine requests are open, so ask whatever you want!)
You were making your way at the grocery store, when you accidently bumped into someone. It was a boy, maybe a better word is a man. He was quit tall, black hair, plump lips, and actually very attractive. The man was very friendly and started a conversation with you. You two kinda clicked at first sight. You were laughing at his jokes and blushing at his compliments, not knewing Felix was just watching you two with rage.
You could say that Felix was your personal stalker, even tho you didn't know he was your personal stalker. He was someone clingy, who always hugged you, who you met almost everywhere you went. It never came to mind he might be following you all day long.
Felix was angry, ofcourse not at you. You were his little princess. He was mad at that man. He couldn't deny that he was very handsome, but you were his. He would never let you go, where you went, he would keep an eye to you.
When he saw that you two exchanged phone numbers, he tried to cover his eyes. He couldn't look at you both. He doesn't want to look ever at these kinds of moments. He had an idea. An idea that would change your perspective on him, that would change both of your lifes. In a good way ofcourse.
You were leaving the grocery store, walking towards you car. Loading everything in the back of your car and driving off. Felix knew where you lived, so following you wasn't the biggest case on this moment. He waited for 3 minutes, and than he started his car and drive off. He drove a little bit further from your living place, so he wouldn't be suspicious.
He texted you something first. Just so you could think about him, for the next last hours in your house.
-Sunshine-
<Heyy mon amor, how are you doing?>
You always found it kind off strange he called you mon amor, but it was Felix. What does it matter?
-Me-
<I am doing great sunny>
-Sunshine-
<Thats great to hear, goodnight senorita>
-Me-
<Hhahahha, goodnight sunny>
He knew there was a key, under a rock in your front garden. So it was easy to get in your house. Your house was very neat. He didn't even trip once. Luckily your stairs didn't make any sounds when you step on it. Silently he could reach your bedroomdoor.
There was still a light, so he decided to wait infront of you door. Suddenly you opened your door, but because your door opened to the right, you couldn't see him.
You went to the bathroom, to brush your teeth and do your skincare. Enough time for him to go towards you bedroom and hide under your bed. He was waiting for a while untill you came.
Maybe 30 minutes later you finally entered your bedroom again. You covered yourself with your cozy blankets. He could smell some of your rose body oil. You were scrolling a bit through instagram. Finally you did your lamp off and fell asleep.
He came out under your bed and stood for a moment still. He looked at you, how beautifull you looked. He wanted to touch you, he wanted to hug you and cuddle with you. He wanted to have you in his arms. But on this time he couldn't... yet.
He had a tissue with some smell on it, that smell could knock you off for some couple hours. He putted his hand on your cheek and whispered: First i've got to do this, honey.'
He putted the tissue on your nose, so you could smell everything and that it would be affective. He could see that it worked, because your arms felt more calmer and rested.
It didn't took him that long to bring you from your bedroom towards his car. He loved to have you in his arms. Your hair tickling his cheek. Your beautifull lips, everything was beautifull.
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You opened your eyes and yawned big. You looked around and your face went pale. This isn't mine bedroom, where am i?! What happend?! Did someone kidnap me?! You jumped out of the bed, but then Felix walked inside.
<You're up!>
<What... what am i doing here?!>
<Honey, relax>
<What-t>
<You heard me baby>
<Stop... calling me that>
<Why would i?>
<You know what, why am i in your bedroom?!>
<You never accepted mine love for you, Y/N.>
He walked closer to you, so close that your back bumped into the wall.
<What do you mean?>
<Y/N, i love you so much, but this is the only option for you to be mine>
<You are scaring me, Felix.>
<Don't be, baby>
<Can i leave, please?>
<Oh, no no no no, baby.>
<I want to leave.>
<I am afraid i cannot do that.>
<Let me go, Felix.>
He came closer, one hand he placed on the wall and the other on your cheek.
<I cannot let go off you Y/N.>
Your eyes started to tear up. His face went from serious to loveable.
<Don't cry, please, Y/N. I want you to be safe, with me, forever.>
He hugged you tightly, your tears felt on his blouse.
<Cry everything out, you are safe with me.>
You felt something in your heart. A sudden feeling when you looked at him. You saw something in him you never saw before. You actually felt safe with him.
He tilted your chin up. His eyes were shining, just like the sun. He brought his lips on your. The kiss was soft and gentle. His tongue slipping a bit in your mouth.
<I love you so much Y/N.>
Those words made your heart shrinck.
He leaded you on the bed and pinned you on the matress. He just kissed you full mouthed. Your hands were around his neck. You could feel every inch of him. Finally he seperated his lips. His arms went towards your waist and he hugged you tightly. You wrapped your arms around him, you could feel his heart beat. You could smell his parfume. You wanted to stay like this forever.
𝐏𝐒𝐘𝐂𝐇𝐎
"Can we stop playing this game, Felix?" You question. You're tired now, of all the chasing, the never getting together, the compliments and then the insults, the fights and then hugging and pretending that it never happened.
"What game?" He questions back, tilting his head slightly to the side with that stupid innocent smile of his that made you fall for him in the first place. When you didn't know it was fake, that is. (inspired by this drabble I wrote)
PAIRING: Lee Felix x Reader (ft. Slight Changbin x Reader)
GENRE: Song-inspired fic (psycho- red velvet) (and inspired by dlc mv! Felix for some reason)
WORD COUNT: 1.2k
WARNINGS: Suggestive themes, contains dark themes like toxic relationships, manipulation, love bombing, possessiveness, jealousy and more. (I mean have you the heard the song this is inspired from?) If any of these themes make you uncomfortable, do not continue reading.
SYNOPSIS: You and Felix are in a very weird and strange relationship. If you can even call it a 'relationship' that is.
"Will you atleast hear me out!?" You almost shouted as soon as you entered his apartment. "Felix!" You hold his wrist to stop him from walking away as his back is to you. He turns around to look you into eyes and his eyes are so cold. He snatches his wrist from your hold without another word. "Oh my God, can you atleast stop ignoring me?" You finally shout now, no longer able to contain yourself.
"What do you want?" He asks in an irritated tone, whirling around to face you again.
"Just hear me out." You try to say calmly again.
"And why the fuck should I do that, huh?" He walks towards you at a fast pace and you back off until you're against the wall, with him directly in front of you, his gaze sharp. "I don't want to hear how you almost fucked your ex while I wasn't here." He said in a low voice harshly. Coming even closer to your face.
"He isn't my ex. And I didn't almost fuck him." You reply.
"Just because you tell a fucking lie, doesn't make it true."
"I'm not lying."
"What else explains you almost sitting in his lap while touching and staring at his lips like a pathetic bitch who has never kissed anyone?" He sounded so mean and condescending and you knew it was intentional. You didn't know if it made it better or worse though.
You gritted your teeth at his tone but tried to remain rational and calm to give him the explanation of what actually happened but fuck, if wasn't he making it difficult as hell. "He got into a fight and busted his lip. I was just helping him clean that up as any good friend would."
"Friend." He scoffed after repeating the word. "Last I remembered you didn't just fuck your friends multiple times?"
"That was so long ago and 4 times isn't multiple times. And you should be the last person talking about fucking your friends."
"Care to repeat that?" He whispered while dropping his already low voice, lower. All the while making unflinching eye contact with you.
"I said, you should be the last person talking about fucking your friends."
"Gosh you really need to be disciplined, don't you? Acting like a fucking brat." He groaned. "And don't try to turn this around on me when you were the one who was caught almost cheating."
You scoffed at that. "What cheating really though, Felix? Last time I checked we weren't dating."
"Don't you dare bring that up at this time." He whispered and you could feel his breath on your lips.
"It's not my fault you're an insecure, paranoid and jealous asshole who thinks me even looking at other people is cheating. Atleast with my friends I don't have to walk on eggshells from the fear of making them upset over the most inconsequential of things."
"Oh so I not enough for you? Is that it?" He did a 180 on his attitude. Again. Now the whispers, the low voice and the sharp eyes were replaced with hushed mumbles, higher voice and the 'sad' eyes. "Is Changbin just so much better than me? Are you gonna leave me for someone else too?" He started talking so fast now, like he was getting anxious or something. Keyword: like. You had been with him long enough to know that Lee Felix did not show any emotion he didn't want to. Every smile, every frown, every expression was planned. As it had been from the very start. And when you finally realised that, it had been too late. You just weren't able to look away from his eyes now.
You sighed before saying what you had countless times in the past. "No, Lix. I'm not going to leave you okay? Just let this go now. And if you don't mind, maybe don't accuse me of cheating in the future when you know damn well I can't."
"Do you want to?" He questioned with a sharp tilt of his head.
"Want to what?"
"Cheat." He looked at you like he was fucking detective and not a dancer, analysing your every little move to see how you would respond.
"For fuck's sake, Felix! No I don't, alright!? You're the only person I want to be with, so now can you stop this?" You shivered from his gaze. Looking like he was so amused and just loving all of this. Like he did all this just to hear these exact words come out of your mouth. You were sure there was a trace of a smirk on his face. And you knew, for a moment, he had dropped his planned expression. Letting you see just what he wanted all along.
He sighed and snaked his arms around your waist. Burying his unfairly beautiful face into your hair while hugging you. Holding you so delicately. You wrap your arms around his neck in return.
"I'm so so sorry. I just messed up again, didn't I? I'm not perfect for you and I could never be. I shouldn't have said all that mean stuff to you, you know I didn't mean it, right? Right?" He asks again when you don't reply.
You roll your eyes, thankful for the fact that he can't see your face right now or he'd start another one of these acts. "Right, of course Felix, I know you didn't." You play with the fluffy blonde hair at his nape
"You still love me right?"
"Of course I do.
"You're not gonna say it?" Now he was just playing. Atleast he had calmed down now. You weren't in the position to ask for more after you almost kissed Changbin. You didn't like lying to him, but he sure loved it. Because he always knew when you were lying. Even now, you could feel it.
"I love you, Lix" Finally something you didn't have to lie about.
"I love you too, love" Love. The only word which had any meaning between you two at this point. Atleast you knew whenever he called you that, he was being geniune. No more games. He pecked your lips while smiling, his eyes turning into half crescent moons for the first and only time that night.
"Although i still have to discipline you for talking to me like that." He whispered lowly in your ear before going to kiss your neck softly. You were sure your neck was going to be littered with love bites now and you'll have to wear your turtleneck tomorrow while he'll question 'why is that? Do you not want other people to know that?' And you'll have to reply that it would awkward and embarrassing if others noticed. But that was a headache for tomorrow. For now you'll let yourself enjoy his soft fingers dipping lower and lower down your waist. Well atleast you get to have amazing sex out of all this. Although that was always a given when it came to Felix.
"I'll make sure that you are reminded of the taste of my lips every fucking time you even think of kissing another person. Let me remind you, who you really belong to."
Yeah you definitely were in a very weird and strange 'relationship'.
𝐅𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐱 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐩 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐰𝐬 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮.
CW: making out, blood, lowkey hematolagnia, very suggestive, no gender specificed
Felix was happy today. More than usual. Yeah he was mostly all smiles and sunshine almost every day. But today he was all giggles and the Sun itself. Apparently, breakfast in bed from you, and then going to the company and hearing they were getting a vacation (a very well deserved one, if you might add) did that. He was smiling and giggling so much today that you seriously couldn't remember the last time when he was this happy aside from your last birthday. So it wasn't surprising that he was really into making out today. You both had decided to spend the day all cozy and fluffy. Wrapped in the softest blanket, with hot chocolate on the bedside table, and reading him the latest book that had gone viral recently. But he definitely wasn't as interested in the book as he was in you.
And so started the light pecks along your neck, then jawline, then both cheeks, the forehead and finally your lips. The light pecks soon turned into kisses and then full on making out while you ran your hands through his soft blonde hair. He just couldn't control himself today. Maybe it was the pure happiness radiating off of him or maybe his teeth were sharper today for some reason, but the moment his teeth sunk into your lower lip, you hissed and your hand instinctively came up to touch it. He was startled and pulled back immediately, watching your lip bleed and thick droplets of blood collecting on your lip.
"Fuck I'm so sorry. I-I didn't me to, seriously. I just- I don't kno-" you cut Felix's rambling off.
"It's fine, really. Don't worry about it." You reassured him.
"B-but you're crying." He mumbled, his eyebrows scrunching whether in confusion or a sad frown, you couldn't tell.
You lightly rolled your eyes at that. "I'm not crying Lix, my eyes are just tearing up. Nothing more."
"Are you sure?" He asked again, concern evident in his voice.
"Of course. And if I'm being honest... it was actually kind hot." You mumbled the end, suddenly feeling embarrassed for confessing that.
He gulped before saying "Don't say stuff like that."
"Why?" You questioned with a head tilt.
"Because it'll do something to me." He leaned closer. You could feel his breath on your lips as he spoke and cupped your cheek.
"Well what if I want something to happen to you?" You question again, sliding your hands into the back of his hair.
"Yeah?" He asks and his eyes darken.
"Yeah." You answer before you're back to making out again. You can feel your own blood on his tongue and you have a feeling this won't be the only time that'll happen tonight.
My View - Lee Felix
Synopsis: Felix was a hard-working guy. He never thought he would be able to achieve his dreams of being a performer. It was even better that he got to experience this journey with his best friends and his biggest supporter, you, his significant other. That doesn't mean Felix doesn't have his bad days.
"If only you could see things from my perspective right now."
Pairing: Idol! Lee Felix x reader Genre: Angst - frustration from rehearsals, established relationship, comforting Felix, fluff towards the end. (I would seriously go to war for Felix)
Word Count: 2.2k
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Pulling up to the JYP building always filled you with excitement. Every time you step through the front doors, you never knew what was awaiting for me. Part of that was due to the eight rowdy boys who called the building their second home. You often heard them before you saw them.
Felix and you have only been together for a few months now. You were still an unfamiliar face walking around the building, which the boys used to their advantage when they wanted to pull pranks and get into trouble. Well, seven of them were always up for causing chaos. Chris preferred to watch from afar and quickly clean up any messes that popped up before anyone noticed. Such a great leader.
You were easily becoming a part of the Stray Kids family. The younger members looked to you as a shoulder to lean on, someone to give advice. Felix’s hyungs approved because they saw how much joy you brought to their sunshine. You were never shy of showing you affection for Felix, always reminding him of your pride in not just being his partner but watching him do what he loved the most. You helped bring normalcy into their lives where they were just a group of guys in their 20s living their best life. They just happened to have high profile careers.
You, on the other hand, worked in the nonprofit sector. Your job focused on education opportunities for immigrant youth. Ironically, your job occupation is one of the many things Felix found attractive about you. Not only was he captivated by your beauty, but he admired your drive and compassion. It takes a lot from someone to do the work you do, but you made it seem so effortless. It just showed how much you cared.
It was late on a Thursday night. You and your team had been prepping for a fundraising event which was taking much of your attention and energy. Nobody really understands how much goes into a nonprofit until they work in one.
Today was one of the days where you two felt like you were pulled in different directions. Felix has been busy the last few days with dance practices, so you knew he had late nights as well. You two would send texts to each other throughout the day, checking in and supporting each other the best you could. Saturdays were reserved just for the two of you for date nights though, so you were relieved knowing you’d see him soon.
The only thing on your mind was ordering take-out and sleeping. That completely changed though when you got a call from Chan. That's odd. He never called me.
You picked up the phone as you put your keys into the apartment door, about to unlock it. "Hey Chan, what's up?" "Y/n? Are you still at work?" "No, I actually just got back to my apartment. What's going on?" "Come to the studio. Now. It's Felix."
Your heart dropped at the mention of Felix. Your mind began racing through all the possibilities of what could be wrong. Was he injured? Did something happen? Whatever it was, you knew you couldn't waste anymore time. "Y/n?" "Sorry, I'm coming," was all you said.
Just as quick as you unlocked it, you yanked the keys out and slammed the front door shut. Your feet carried you quickly down the steps leading up to your unit and straight to your car in the parking lot. You had this sickening feeling in your gut that something was wrong. Especially by the urgency in Chan's voice. He was not the type of guy to sugarcoat anything.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
By the time you got to the JYP building, Hyunjin was upfront waiting for you. That's not a good sign. You parked your car in the guest parking lot before jumping out with your keys, forgetting about your pursue. All that mattered was how quickly you could get to Felix.
"Hyunjin-ah, what's wrong?" "I don't even know. I was just told to wait up front for you, so I could make sure your car is locked. He's in the practice room."
You tossed your car keys to Hyunjin before you took off running towards the practice room. You noticed that five of the other boys lined up the hallway outside of the room. Chan must be in there with Felix. The sight made your heart drop.
Your heavy breathing and footsteps gained the attention of the five members outside. They both looked concerned yet relieved to see you. You didn't have enough time to ask questions before making your way towards the door. All of their eyes were trained on you.
Very gently, you knocked on the door. You didn't want to cause anymore stress, regardless of what might be happening on the other side of the door.
"Changbin, I know you care, but we just need y/n," Chan shouted out from inside. "Chan, it's y/n. I am here."
Silence filled the hallway as everyone seemed to listen in. You could hear footsteps from the other side of the door. You didn't even know you were holding your breath as your mind spiraled to what could be happening on the other side.
The door opened slowly. It revealed Chan who seemed to be a bit revealed. But looking into his eyes, you knew that there was something wrong.
"Guys, listen, I know we all car about Felix, but he only wants y/n right now," Chan explained. His voice was scarily calm yet also quiet. You were always appreciative that Chan looked out for his members, his brothers, his kids. Especially always looking after Felix.
The rest of the guys nodded their heads. They stepped back to make Sur they weren't overcrowding the doorway. All of them cared for one another, so they would do anything for each other.
Chan slowly opened the door, granting you access. He smiled at you as you swapped positions. You were now inside the room where as he joined the rest of the kids out in the hallway. The door closed behind you which caused you to turn fully towards your beloved.
He was sitting on the floor of the practice room, his head in his hands. Of course, some practices got Felix frustrated. You were always there to comfort him, to help him work through any of the choreography to the best of your ability. He always managed to work through it, seeing those frustrations as motivation. This was different.
It was eerily silent in the room. The only thing you could hear was soft sniffles. Each one causing cracks in your heart.
"Lixie?" You called out. You didn't want to make things worse and startle him. You also were aware maybe that he needed space, so you didn't want to violate any of his personal space.
He picked his head up, looking straight ahead. Your eyes met in the reflection of the mirror. A trail of tears was marked on his cheeks, the light catching the wet trail. His eyes were a bit red, which you weren't sure if it was how long he'd been crying or from his hands pressed into his gorgeous face.
"Y/n."
His eyes didn't leave yours. He needed you.
Without running over, you walked to him. You knew sudden movements would make matters worse. In this room, it was just the two of you. You moved with urgency across the practice floor until you were in front of him.
Once you were in front of him, you took a seat on the floor in front of him. You were sitting criss-crossed, your hands gently reaching out to his. You offered a gentle smile. His hands slipped into yours. It was a start. "What's going on, love?" You asked gently.
Now, you weren't sure if Felix wanted to even talk about what he was dealing with. However, you knew it was better to offer than say nothing at all. Felix always knew he could vent to you whenever, but you still liked to remind him that it was safe to do so. You would wait here all day if need be, if that is what Felix needed.
"I'm not good enough," he murmured.
Your heart shattered hearing his self-doubt. There were times Felix got frustrated because he was just so passionate about performing. This is the only thing that he thought he was meant to do in this life. Sometimes you wondered if he thought back to when he got eliminated during their pre-debut days.
However, you knew how hard Felix has overcome to set that now minor setback. He was one of the most recognizable idols in k-pop, proving that to be true with his impressive vocal range and his impressive dance skills. He was born to be on stage. Yet, that didn't mean he didn't doubt himself.
"What happened?" "Lee Know was showing us new choreography he wanted to learn. It acquires a bit more acrobatics than what we usually do. I thought it would be no problem for me, but-"
You could see tears swelling in his eyes again. Some fell but he tried to quickly blink the rest. Letting go of one hand, you squeezed the other to show you had no intentions of leaving. With your now free hand, you reached forward to gently wipe the tears away that were falling onto his cheeks.
His head gently tilted into your thumb. Taking note, you let your full hand cup his cheek. He sighed at the feeling of the warmth of your palm. You smiled gently to see him responsive to you.
The last thing you would want is for Felix to feel like he is doing this on his own. He had his members, his family supporting you and he also had you. Felix always uplifted you on your worst days, helping to remind you of your self-worth. And you would always do the same. This was one of those moments where you needed to reemphasize your role as his significant other. "But I just can't get it. I can't move my body correctly which makes it feel like I'm not trying hard enough," he murmured. "Like I'm failing. You hear groups coming and going, how things can shift overnight. What if I'm the reason stays don't stay and why Stray Kids becomes just a memory and not a legacy? I don't want to disappoint you or the boys."
For a moment, you remained silent. You already were working through the words to say. While you weren't an idol yourself, you didn't want to invalidate Felix's emotions. You knew that the music industry was brutal and there were a lot of risks involved.
What you did know for sure was just how successful Stray Kids is, how successful he is. He was facing a challenge, like he had before, and he would overcome it. Felix just needed to believe in himself. "Baby boy, this is the first day of learning this choreography. It's not going to be perfect no matter how much you wish it was," you sighed. It was the truth. It was frustrating, yes, but it required practice. "I know for a fact though that the boys would never allow you to fail. Maybe you can keep practicing with Lee Know, or maybe you guys change the choreography. The guys will never let you feel like you fail because you guys are one team which means that you help each other out."
Felix nodded his head gently. He was slowly starting to accept his words but he couldn't quite ignore his personal demons yet. That is where you come in. You weren't going to leave his side until your sunshine returned.
"I don't want to disappoint you either." "Felix, love, that is impossible. You are my life, my love. I am impressed simply by your existence."
He raised an eyebrow at you, confused yet encouraging you to continue speaking. You gladly will praise him as much as he needs to hear, or how much anyone was willing to listen.
"I have never met someone as compassionate as you. Even when you are tired, you go out of your way to show your appreciation not just to your fans, to stay, but to the members, your family, and even me. You always are there to lend a helping hand because you care about everyone else sometimes before yourself. It is true you radiate sunshine because you capture everyone's attention, you can make everyone smile just by being in the same room as you."
For the first time since entering the dance studio, he smiled. His forehead leaned forward until he pressed against yours. You smiled up at him, just happy to see him feeling the slightest bit better.
"I am so lucky to have you even when I'm silly and can't regulate my emotions." "Felix, it's normal to feel frustrated. You know better than anyone that I get that way too. But that's why I'm here. I'm here to support you on your best days, your worst days, and the days in between."
You pulled back gently from him. You tilted your head up until your lips pressed against his forehead lingeringly. At the acton, he could feel his ears turn red but also his smile grow. His eyes fluttered shut, just to take in the moment.
He was the luckiest guy in the world to have you, and you felt like you were even luckier.
Our Story Won't End - Lee Felix
Synopsis: "I refuse to give up on us." Pairing: College Student!Lee Felix x fem. reader
Genre: Angst. Established relationships, arguing with one another, fighting for one another with one another.
Word Count: 2.8k
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Felix re-read your text message to him over and over again. How could he be so ignorant? It felt like he had the opportunity of a lifetime, but he had just wasted it.
He had to make things right.
Last night, Felix took you out on a date. A first date, to be exact. Everyone had been waiting for the moment where he finally confessed his feelings to you. I mean, everyone seemed to see there was a connection between the two of you besides the two of you. For him, he just had to build up his own courage to believe you were were interested in him.
The two of you met through Hyunjin, who shared an Art History seminar with you. One day, when Felix was waiting for Hyunjin to get out of class, he saw you emerge from the building. Instantly, Felix had to find out your name.
Just finding out who you were led to this beautiful friendship. But the friendship slowly was beginning to transform to mutual pining. You had always found Felix attractive. The first thing you noticed about him was his freckles, which looked like as if they were kisses from angels across his cheeks. And he noticed your bright smile. You had the ability to light up whatever room you stepped into, capturing everyone's attention.
That sheer observation made it more urgent Felix makes a move before someone decided to come along and sweep you off your feet first. He at least wanted the opportunity to prove his capability of being the man you needed.
Your friends and Felix's had taken it upon themselves to get you two together, one way or another. It had been a struggle for a few weeks, but eventually, Felix got the bravery to finally ask you out.
He had anticipated this date for a week and a half. The only reason why the date was pushed back so far was due to midterms. He completely understood as he had his own papers and projects to turn in. Any amount of time would be worth it to finally get some one-on-one time with you.
He promised to take you out to a nice dinner in town followed by a walk along one of the bridges connecting downtown to another part of the city. It had a breathtaking view of the city. A hopeless romantic, he knew the view wouldn't compare to you though. All he wanted was to bring you somewhere to show you off and wow you. Word had traveled from Hyunjin that you were growing frustrated with dating, the lack of effort people were putting into planning dates.
Felix saw the challenge and wanted to beat it. The ultimate victory would be claiming you as his.
However, the date itself was a recipe for disaster.
First of all, it started raining that afternoon and wasn't forecasted to lighten up until the next day. There was no way that Felix would postpone the day, not when you both had been counting the days. Adding an extra day seemed torturous to the both of you. He promised that he would come up with an alternate plan for the bridge after dinner, something that would keep the night going and keep you both wet and warm.
That part at least was out of his control. Everything else that proceeds unfortunately was caused by him.
Changbin and Minho had came home from an early afternoon gym session, their own way to combat the dreary afternoon. After every gym session resulted in a feast by the two. Mainly by Minho because Changbin most likely would cause a fire. Felix decided to join in and enjoy the meal with his two friends.
He wasn't going to pick you up until 6pm. He would be fine. Besides, if he ate now, he wouldn't overstuff himself at dinner.
A full stomach led to a sleepy Felix. And his bed seemed so tempting. A quick nap wouldn't harm. He would be able to stay out all night, if you wanted.
However, Felix missed a key detail. He never set his alarm or asked any of his housemates to wake him up, so he had ample time to get ready for the date.
5 Missed Texts from y/n 1 Missed Call from y/n
Felix jolted awake from the feeling of vibrations against his bed. He looked down to se you had attempted to call him, and now you were in the process of leaving a voicemail. What is going on? Is she okay?
Seeing the time flash on his phone, his eyes widened and heart dropped. 5:45pm. Fuck.
Quickly, he began to frantically text you.
"Hey sweet girl, I'm sorry. I took a nap 🥲 Let me hop in the shower and I'll be over"
What crushed Felix the most was that you texted back almost instantly. He wouldn't be surprised if you cancelled the date. Not when he treated it like it was nothing by foolishly taking a nap.
"No worries! Just text me when you're heading over"
God, he didn't deserve you.
By the time Felix showered, got dressed, and was ready to go, it was 6:20pm. Probably the fastest shower he's ever taken but still didn't feel fast enough considering you were waiting on him.
"Hey, aren't you supposed to be on your date?" Chan asked him. "Yeah, yeah, I'm going," Felix muttered back.
He had no time in side conversations as he was late as it is. Chan, sensing the irritation of the young man, put his hands up in defense and walked away. Felix hated being short with people, not wanting to be rude or inconsiderate. He was definitely getting inside his own head for being so irresponsible.
"heading over right now" "ok! drive safe and text me when you are here 🩷"
At least you didn't seem too mad at him.
Felix rushed out to his car in lightening speed. It was moments like this when he wished superpowers weren't fictional. If he could, he would snap his fingers and already arrive at your doorstep. Anything to cut down on the time you were waiting for him.
The drive was quite smooth considering how much it was rain. Puddles were already starting to gather on the roads. Of course, Felix wasn't driving recklessly despite the pressure he was facing. He was trying to remain as cool and collected, especially as people tend to drive unpredictable when there were hazardous conditions. The last thing Felix wanted was to cause a bigger mess by letting his frustrations get the best of him.
It was while driving he began to realize just how full he was. Maybe the rushing around to get ready or sleeping on his stomach upset his stomach. What he did know was that he couldn't sit down for a full meal as he promised to you. "Shit," he sighed. You had been so understanding so far. He was sure you'd get it.
The GPS was guiding Felix to your apartment. Every now and then, he would glance to make sure he was heading in the right direction. Once he saw he arrived, he turned it off to begin to hunt down for a parking spot. There were times Felix was grateful for having a car, as it helped him get around easily around the city. Yet, moments like this, when there seems to be no available parking made him wish he didn't drive.
The only available parking spot was about a block and a half away from your apartment. It was still raining, but nothing as crazy as it was when he left his own apartment.
"hey! just arrived" "oh perfect, I'll head down. see you soon!"
His heart fluttered at your text messages. The date had started on a rough start considering he was late, but he was determined to make sure it was still a good date. One that at least would land him a second date where he could really win you over.
Turning off the ignition, he stepped out of the car. However, he was immediately met by a car splashing water on him as they sped by.
"You've got to be kidding me!"
How can this get any worse?
Buzz buzz
He glanced down to see your name flash on the screen. He tried his best to let the anger subside before picking up the phone. Not exactly the best tone to start off the evening.
"Hello?" "Hey! I don't see you."
Felix's eyebrows furrowed together and he frowned. He glanced around his surroundings as he stood on the sidewalk. What? Did he put in the wrong address?
"Are you positive? I'm like across the street from you."
There was a pause. Maybe you were checking your surroundings? Maybe you didn't quite catch him the first time because of the passing traffic?
"Yeah, Lix, I'm positive. Are you on Oakwood?"
Oakwood Avenue? Felix was about to respond but he glanced up at the light post at the corner of the sidewalk. He squinted his eyes to see the green street sign to indicate where he was. Instantly, his confidence flattened.
Gates Street.
"Oh y/n, I'm sorry. I'm on Gates." Felix began to look around to try to figure out which way he should walk, so he could get to you. What an impression he was making, huh?
"Don't worry, Felix! I can start walking in that direction. You're about one block away from me. I'll start walking right now." "Ok."
Felix hung up first before sliding his phone away in the pocket of his rain jacket. The bottom half of him was still soaked from being splashed, including his shoes and socks. This was just a disaster. The only saving grace was that he was finally going to be able to see you.
That was why Felix remained where he was. If it was anyone else, he would have just turned on his heels back to his car and head home. He couldn't do that to you, not when he kept you waiting both for the day of the date but for himself. He had to try to salvage the rest of the evening.
From a distance, Felix saw you approaching him. His eyes widened to see how you were dressed. Even despite the rain, you went above and beyond. For him. You were wearing a black silk skirt with white tennis shoes, a mix of different styles but still spoke true to your personality. You also wore a black ribbed shirt underneath your pink rain jacket. You had your hair down in your natural hair. Felix always loved how your hair looked. He wanted so desperately to drive his fingers through it. He also took note of the gold earrings you wore. You looked heavenly.
And it made him feel like absolute shit. The fact he was dripping wet didn't hide his outfit choice. He wore a simple pair of jeans, a black hoodie, and black sneakers. It was almost as if he just picked whatever clothes he thought were clean.
"Hi Felix," you greeted him, a wide smile on your face. "Hi y/n," he smiled weakly.
Not much was exchanging between the two of you. Felix did open the passenger door for you, to help you in. He quickly jogged around to the driver side before slipping in. One of the things you adored about Felix was his bubbly personality. He was the definition of sunshine. Unfortunately, it seemed like the sunshine was being blocked out by the rain.
"So I was thinking maybe we can go out to eat and just sit by the bridge? I know it's not the same as walking it, but I figured we could still go see it?" "Oh yeah, that sounds great! Are we still doing korean barbecue?"
Felix's stomach churned at the thought of eating that much food. He quickly shook his head as he buckled himself into the seat. You couldn't help bur frown. You had been looking forward to going to the restaurant since he proposed the idea when he asked you out.
"I'm sorry, y/n. My stomach hurts a bit. Why don't we just do drive thru so we can eat in the car and not get wet anymore?"
Trying to be optimistic, you nodded your head. You kept a gentle smile on your face. You were still getting the chance to spend time with Felix. He at least still showed up for the date. It was something better than nothing.
"Yeah, Felix, that sounds good." "McDonalds?"
Maybe you spoke too soon.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Staring at the text you sent Felix, you let an exasperated sigh. You really wanted things to work out with Felix. He seemed like a genuine guy, someone down to earth and unafraid to express himself. You needed a change from the typical guy you go for. And Hyunjin hyped up what a great guy Felix was.
And it was evident from how much Felix texted you. You had been under the impression that he was into you, especially with how detailed he was about your plans for the first date. You had gotten so excited just for it to burst.
You tried your damn best to be understanding. Things change, and dating in college doesn't always mean you have to have the most romantic first dates. You had just be hyped up to expect more to be left with next to nothing.
Part of you was also upset just that he seemed not to care when he met up with you in person. He seemed to say all the right things to lure you in, and maybe he assumed he didn't need to impress you? That you were already his?
If that's the case, you didn't want to be a part of it. You wanted someone who was going to put in effort, just as you did. Or at least as much as they could. You realized that putting 100% effort is an unrealistic ask, but you at least wanted someone to communicate with you. You just couldn't shake off that Felix seemed to be in such a sour mood throughout most of the date.
Did he really not want to be with you? Did he only go out with you because you knew Hyunjin? It just left you feeling shitty.
Knock knock
You looked up from your phone, which laid on your comforter, to look towards your bedroom door. Your roommate was peaking her head in with a soft smile. You couldn't help but raise an eyebrow and match her smile.
"What did you do?" You playfully asked. "I didn't do anything. All I'm saying is that you might want to come downstairs."
And just like that, she slipped away. Your curiosity was peaked, so you had to go investigate. Slowly, you pushed yourself off the bed to go venture downstairs.
"Hi y/n."
That voice. Your eyes looked down the staircase to see Felix standing at the front of the door. He had an apologetic smile on his face as he stood within the threshold. There was a bouquet of flowers in his hand with a small plastic container of brownies, or at least that's what you believed from the distance.
"Oh, hi Felix. I guess this is why you left me on open," you laughed awkwardly.
He shared in that awkward laughter. You couldn't deny that your heart swelled that he still showed up at the door, but why was he here?
"Y/n, I know I don't deserve a second chance. I really fucked up our first date. Literally has to go down in history as the worst first date of all time."
Well, there is no arguing with that. Yet, you still were willing to hear him out. You made your way down the staircase until you reached the foyer, only a few feet away from him now. Up close, you could see more of the freckles that made you weak in the knees.
"I've been waiting for the chance to take you out, to treat you special and I failed. Of course, getting to see you was amazing. You're even more incredible than Hyunjin described. I owe you a massive apology for wasting your time and treating you poorly. If you could, I would love a chance to make things right."
"Brownies are a good start," you said.
His eyes widened slowly, registering what you just said to him. "Really?" he whispered.
You couldn't help but giggle, genuinely this time. You nodded your head as you stepped closer to him, taking the flowers into your arms. "Come on, we can go to the kitchen. I can make some tea or something. Maybe we can watch a movie and eat these brownies?" You suggested.
This definitely was the second chance Felix prayed for.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Unfortunately based on a real date I had this past weekend just with an alternative ending that I would've liked. Essentially had to end things with a cute guy for putting in very little effort 😅
Dating in yours 20s is definitely an *experience* let me just say that
tried a new time to post the other day and it isn’t working out 😅 trying to give this a fighting chance!
who doesn’t love sweetie Felix trying to win you back?
Our Story Won't End - Lee Felix
Synopsis: "I refuse to give up on us." Pairing: College Student!Lee Felix x fem. reader
Genre: Angst. Established relationships, arguing with one another, fighting for one another with one another.
Word Count: 2.8k
——————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————
Felix re-read your text message to him over and over again. How could he be so ignorant? It felt like he had the opportunity of a lifetime, but he had just wasted it.
He had to make things right.
Last night, Felix took you out on a date. A first date, to be exact. Everyone had been waiting for the moment where he finally confessed his feelings to you. I mean, everyone seemed to see there was a connection between the two of you besides the two of you. For him, he just had to build up his own courage to believe you were were interested in him.
The two of you met through Hyunjin, who shared an Art History seminar with you. One day, when Felix was waiting for Hyunjin to get out of class, he saw you emerge from the building. Instantly, Felix had to find out your name.
Just finding out who you were led to this beautiful friendship. But the friendship slowly was beginning to transform to mutual pining. You had always found Felix attractive. The first thing you noticed about him was his freckles, which looked like as if they were kisses from angels across his cheeks. And he noticed your bright smile. You had the ability to light up whatever room you stepped into, capturing everyone's attention.
That sheer observation made it more urgent Felix makes a move before someone decided to come along and sweep you off your feet first. He at least wanted the opportunity to prove his capability of being the man you needed.
Your friends and Felix's had taken it upon themselves to get you two together, one way or another. It had been a struggle for a few weeks, but eventually, Felix got the bravery to finally ask you out.
He had anticipated this date for a week and a half. The only reason why the date was pushed back so far was due to midterms. He completely understood as he had his own papers and projects to turn in. Any amount of time would be worth it to finally get some one-on-one time with you.
He promised to take you out to a nice dinner in town followed by a walk along one of the bridges connecting downtown to another part of the city. It had a breathtaking view of the city. A hopeless romantic, he knew the view wouldn't compare to you though. All he wanted was to bring you somewhere to show you off and wow you. Word had traveled from Hyunjin that you were growing frustrated with dating, the lack of effort people were putting into planning dates.
Felix saw the challenge and wanted to beat it. The ultimate victory would be claiming you as his.
However, the date itself was a recipe for disaster.
First of all, it started raining that afternoon and wasn't forecasted to lighten up until the next day. There was no way that Felix would postpone the day, not when you both had been counting the days. Adding an extra day seemed torturous to the both of you. He promised that he would come up with an alternate plan for the bridge after dinner, something that would keep the night going and keep you both wet and warm.
That part at least was out of his control. Everything else that proceeds unfortunately was caused by him.
Changbin and Minho had came home from an early afternoon gym session, their own way to combat the dreary afternoon. After every gym session resulted in a feast by the two. Mainly by Minho because Changbin most likely would cause a fire. Felix decided to join in and enjoy the meal with his two friends.
He wasn't going to pick you up until 6pm. He would be fine. Besides, if he ate now, he wouldn't overstuff himself at dinner.
A full stomach led to a sleepy Felix. And his bed seemed so tempting. A quick nap wouldn't harm. He would be able to stay out all night, if you wanted.
However, Felix missed a key detail. He never set his alarm or asked any of his housemates to wake him up, so he had ample time to get ready for the date.
5 Missed Texts from y/n 1 Missed Call from y/n
Felix jolted awake from the feeling of vibrations against his bed. He looked down to se you had attempted to call him, and now you were in the process of leaving a voicemail. What is going on? Is she okay?
Seeing the time flash on his phone, his eyes widened and heart dropped. 5:45pm. Fuck.
Quickly, he began to frantically text you.
"Hey sweet girl, I'm sorry. I took a nap 🥲 Let me hop in the shower and I'll be over"
What crushed Felix the most was that you texted back almost instantly. He wouldn't be surprised if you cancelled the date. Not when he treated it like it was nothing by foolishly taking a nap.
"No worries! Just text me when you're heading over"
God, he didn't deserve you.
By the time Felix showered, got dressed, and was ready to go, it was 6:20pm. Probably the fastest shower he's ever taken but still didn't feel fast enough considering you were waiting on him.
"Hey, aren't you supposed to be on your date?" Chan asked him. "Yeah, yeah, I'm going," Felix muttered back.
He had no time in side conversations as he was late as it is. Chan, sensing the irritation of the young man, put his hands up in defense and walked away. Felix hated being short with people, not wanting to be rude or inconsiderate. He was definitely getting inside his own head for being so irresponsible.
"heading over right now" "ok! drive safe and text me when you are here 🩷"
At least you didn't seem too mad at him.
Felix rushed out to his car in lightening speed. It was moments like this when he wished superpowers weren't fictional. If he could, he would snap his fingers and already arrive at your doorstep. Anything to cut down on the time you were waiting for him.
The drive was quite smooth considering how much it was rain. Puddles were already starting to gather on the roads. Of course, Felix wasn't driving recklessly despite the pressure he was facing. He was trying to remain as cool and collected, especially as people tend to drive unpredictable when there were hazardous conditions. The last thing Felix wanted was to cause a bigger mess by letting his frustrations get the best of him.
It was while driving he began to realize just how full he was. Maybe the rushing around to get ready or sleeping on his stomach upset his stomach. What he did know was that he couldn't sit down for a full meal as he promised to you. "Shit," he sighed. You had been so understanding so far. He was sure you'd get it.
The GPS was guiding Felix to your apartment. Every now and then, he would glance to make sure he was heading in the right direction. Once he saw he arrived, he turned it off to begin to hunt down for a parking spot. There were times Felix was grateful for having a car, as it helped him get around easily around the city. Yet, moments like this, when there seems to be no available parking made him wish he didn't drive.
The only available parking spot was about a block and a half away from your apartment. It was still raining, but nothing as crazy as it was when he left his own apartment.
"hey! just arrived" "oh perfect, I'll head down. see you soon!"
His heart fluttered at your text messages. The date had started on a rough start considering he was late, but he was determined to make sure it was still a good date. One that at least would land him a second date where he could really win you over.
Turning off the ignition, he stepped out of the car. However, he was immediately met by a car splashing water on him as they sped by.
"You've got to be kidding me!"
How can this get any worse?
Buzz buzz
He glanced down to see your name flash on the screen. He tried his best to let the anger subside before picking up the phone. Not exactly the best tone to start off the evening.
"Hello?" "Hey! I don't see you."
Felix's eyebrows furrowed together and he frowned. He glanced around his surroundings as he stood on the sidewalk. What? Did he put in the wrong address?
"Are you positive? I'm like across the street from you."
There was a pause. Maybe you were checking your surroundings? Maybe you didn't quite catch him the first time because of the passing traffic?
"Yeah, Lix, I'm positive. Are you on Oakwood?"
Oakwood Avenue? Felix was about to respond but he glanced up at the light post at the corner of the sidewalk. He squinted his eyes to see the green street sign to indicate where he was. Instantly, his confidence flattened.
Gates Street.
"Oh y/n, I'm sorry. I'm on Gates." Felix began to look around to try to figure out which way he should walk, so he could get to you. What an impression he was making, huh?
"Don't worry, Felix! I can start walking in that direction. You're about one block away from me. I'll start walking right now." "Ok."
Felix hung up first before sliding his phone away in the pocket of his rain jacket. The bottom half of him was still soaked from being splashed, including his shoes and socks. This was just a disaster. The only saving grace was that he was finally going to be able to see you.
That was why Felix remained where he was. If it was anyone else, he would have just turned on his heels back to his car and head home. He couldn't do that to you, not when he kept you waiting both for the day of the date but for himself. He had to try to salvage the rest of the evening.
From a distance, Felix saw you approaching him. His eyes widened to see how you were dressed. Even despite the rain, you went above and beyond. For him. You were wearing a black silk skirt with white tennis shoes, a mix of different styles but still spoke true to your personality. You also wore a black ribbed shirt underneath your pink rain jacket. You had your hair down in your natural hair. Felix always loved how your hair looked. He wanted so desperately to drive his fingers through it. He also took note of the gold earrings you wore. You looked heavenly.
And it made him feel like absolute shit. The fact he was dripping wet didn't hide his outfit choice. He wore a simple pair of jeans, a black hoodie, and black sneakers. It was almost as if he just picked whatever clothes he thought were clean.
"Hi Felix," you greeted him, a wide smile on your face. "Hi y/n," he smiled weakly.
Not much was exchanging between the two of you. Felix did open the passenger door for you, to help you in. He quickly jogged around to the driver side before slipping in. One of the things you adored about Felix was his bubbly personality. He was the definition of sunshine. Unfortunately, it seemed like the sunshine was being blocked out by the rain.
"So I was thinking maybe we can go out to eat and just sit by the bridge? I know it's not the same as walking it, but I figured we could still go see it?" "Oh yeah, that sounds great! Are we still doing korean barbecue?"
Felix's stomach churned at the thought of eating that much food. He quickly shook his head as he buckled himself into the seat. You couldn't help bur frown. You had been looking forward to going to the restaurant since he proposed the idea when he asked you out.
"I'm sorry, y/n. My stomach hurts a bit. Why don't we just do drive thru so we can eat in the car and not get wet anymore?"
Trying to be optimistic, you nodded your head. You kept a gentle smile on your face. You were still getting the chance to spend time with Felix. He at least still showed up for the date. It was something better than nothing.
"Yeah, Felix, that sounds good." "McDonalds?"
Maybe you spoke too soon.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Staring at the text you sent Felix, you let an exasperated sigh. You really wanted things to work out with Felix. He seemed like a genuine guy, someone down to earth and unafraid to express himself. You needed a change from the typical guy you go for. And Hyunjin hyped up what a great guy Felix was.
And it was evident from how much Felix texted you. You had been under the impression that he was into you, especially with how detailed he was about your plans for the first date. You had gotten so excited just for it to burst.
You tried your damn best to be understanding. Things change, and dating in college doesn't always mean you have to have the most romantic first dates. You had just be hyped up to expect more to be left with next to nothing.
Part of you was also upset just that he seemed not to care when he met up with you in person. He seemed to say all the right things to lure you in, and maybe he assumed he didn't need to impress you? That you were already his?
If that's the case, you didn't want to be a part of it. You wanted someone who was going to put in effort, just as you did. Or at least as much as they could. You realized that putting 100% effort is an unrealistic ask, but you at least wanted someone to communicate with you. You just couldn't shake off that Felix seemed to be in such a sour mood throughout most of the date.
Did he really not want to be with you? Did he only go out with you because you knew Hyunjin? It just left you feeling shitty.
Knock knock
You looked up from your phone, which laid on your comforter, to look towards your bedroom door. Your roommate was peaking her head in with a soft smile. You couldn't help but raise an eyebrow and match her smile.
"What did you do?" You playfully asked. "I didn't do anything. All I'm saying is that you might want to come downstairs."
And just like that, she slipped away. Your curiosity was peaked, so you had to go investigate. Slowly, you pushed yourself off the bed to go venture downstairs.
"Hi y/n."
That voice. Your eyes looked down the staircase to see Felix standing at the front of the door. He had an apologetic smile on his face as he stood within the threshold. There was a bouquet of flowers in his hand with a small plastic container of brownies, or at least that's what you believed from the distance.
"Oh, hi Felix. I guess this is why you left me on open," you laughed awkwardly.
He shared in that awkward laughter. You couldn't deny that your heart swelled that he still showed up at the door, but why was he here?
"Y/n, I know I don't deserve a second chance. I really fucked up our first date. Literally has to go down in history as the worst first date of all time."
Well, there is no arguing with that. Yet, you still were willing to hear him out. You made your way down the staircase until you reached the foyer, only a few feet away from him now. Up close, you could see more of the freckles that made you weak in the knees.
"I've been waiting for the chance to take you out, to treat you special and I failed. Of course, getting to see you was amazing. You're even more incredible than Hyunjin described. I owe you a massive apology for wasting your time and treating you poorly. If you could, I would love a chance to make things right."
"Brownies are a good start," you said.
His eyes widened slowly, registering what you just said to him. "Really?" he whispered.
You couldn't help but giggle, genuinely this time. You nodded your head as you stepped closer to him, taking the flowers into your arms. "Come on, we can go to the kitchen. I can make some tea or something. Maybe we can watch a movie and eat these brownies?" You suggested.
This definitely was the second chance Felix prayed for.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Unfortunately based on a real date I had this past weekend just with an alternative ending that I would've liked. Essentially had to end things with a cute guy for putting in very little effort 😅
Dating in yours 20s is definitely an *experience* let me just say that
fried eggs and pillow talk
rated: m
wc: ~ 5400
synopsis: it's not like you meant to fall for the charms of the office flirt and follow him home after a night out with your coworkers. either way, you are now left to deal with the consequences.
tags: felix x female reader; colleagues au; one night stand au; smut; fluff; banter; misunderstandings; domestic yongbok; hyunjin as felix's roommate; me being obsessed with the pet name 'love'; confessions; surprisingly soft(?); mayhaps i have a big fat crush on yongbok; stayed up past 4am to finish this bitch because fuck sleeping, amirite? (i'm not); anyway, enjoy!!
-
Pounding, piercing, disorienting pain.
For a good few seconds, that is all there is. You realize that this sensation is concentrated to your head. No, actually, your stomach, too.
After a few moments more, you remember that you have other senses, as well, which allow you to feel your sweat dampening the sheets embracing you and to hear the melodic songs of birds outside.
Lastly, you're struck with the idea that you possess the ability to open your eyes. It kind of makes the ache sizzling within you a little angrier and so you have to struggle some to pry your lids apart, but you eventually succeed. Though, as soon as you do, an expanding part of you wishes you hadn't.
Because you're met with a familiar mess of blonde, frizzy hair.
In the same way that the early morning sunrays sting your eyes, memories from the previous evening come pouring in to sting your brain. You drown in flashing impressions of Felix's toothy smile as he buys you a drink, his hand holding yours as you stumble through the bar and past the prying eyes of your coworkers, his breath against your mouth as he swallows your moans while he fucks you into his sticky sheets.
Oh god. No no no.
You feel yourself freefall into awareness, stomach turning as you fully awaken into your grueling hangover, head pounding in time with your heartbeat and room spinning slightly. Or maybe you're still drunk, you can't tell. It doesn't help to sit up but it's an instinct, as you dizzily try to assess your surroundings.
Clothes are scattered messily across the floor - you're naked, he's naked. Felix's shoulders rise and fall steadily where he lies with his back facing you - he's asleep. The sun is bright outside, casting the room in a white, blinding glow - the busses have definitely started their schedule for the day. You remember Felix telling you his roommate is out of town - you could make your escape unnoticed. Your stomach grumbles, bubbling uncomfortably - you need to use the bathroom.
Having determined your first quest in the escape plan, you slowly uncover yourself from the duvet, standing up on unsteady feet. Your hands shoot upward to cradle your throbbing headache, eyes squinting to find your way into the bathroom as you try to ignore waves of nausea that threaten to pull you under with every other step you take.
It takes a distressing amount of time to settle your upset stomach, eyes closed to concentrate on not throwing up and feet planted firmly against the floor to prevent yourself from falling off the toilet and onto the cold, tiled floor. As you stand up, you swear gravity shifts and you grip the toilet to maintain your balance. For a moment, you seriously consider not flushing to decrease the risk of Felix waking up from the sound but quickly realize that it's a ridiculous thought and press the button, your headache pulsing in time with the loud noise.
What meets you in the mirror is nothing short of a walking, talking, swollen monstrosity and you quickly look away, cringing. After washing your hands and splashing your face with some cool water to counter the beads of sweat traveling down your forehead, you make your way back into the bedroom.
You release a breath you didn't realize you were holding when you see Felix, still unmoving atop his bed. Your narrow glare jumps between the articles of clothing spread around the floor. It is time to let the second quest in your escape plan commence.
It is certainly easier said than done to crouch down and pick your strewn-about clothes up when your sense of balance is thrown completely out of whack, let alone to stay standing on one foot at a time as you try to dress yourself while simultaneously keeping bile from rising from the pits of your stomach. It only takes a few times of bending down and standing back up before your ears are ringing and your headache is creeping its way forward to probe at the sides of your eyeballs, feet stumbling clumsily across the floor. And all you can think about is how the hell you are going to make it all the way back home like this.
Your thoughts are abruptly interrupted when a hand lands on your shoulder and a disorienting jolt shoots through your body at the surprise.
"Wha-"
The only reason you don't fall over is because another hand comes up to steady you, holding you firmly until you've regained some semblance of balance. The hands have a sturdy grip on your upper arms and you can feel your heart trying to beat its way out of your chest when the hands slowly turn you around to face their owner.
Felix's eyes are barely open, eyebrows deeply furrowed and yellowish hair closely resembling a bird's nest atop his head once you face him. Somewhere far, far back within the tangled knots that are your mind, you resent the fact that despite looking like he was clubbed across the head, Felix looks nothing short of unarguably attractive.
Those swollen, pink lips were busy kissing you last night, you annoyingly remember.
He says nothing and neither do you, unsure of what to tell him in your half-dressed state, shirt still hanging from your fingertips and zipper still wide open over your crotch. Gently, almost blindly, Felix's one hand travels down your arm to take your shirt from your hold and drop it on the floor again. You can't protest through the tightened walls of your throat. With one hand on each of your elbows, he begins walking and steering you toward his bed. In order to not fall over as you stumble backward, your hands instinctively shoot up to grip his elbows as well.
"Felix," you rasp, finally finding your ability to verbally object.
"Shhh," is all you get as a response.
Just as the backs of your legs reach his mattress, Felix stops before slowly pushing you down, making you sit. He doesn't stop there, completing his task by guiding you back to lay on his bed again and pulling the covers over you before standing back up, fingers rubbing across his eyelid.
"Felix-"
"Sleep," he orders, his already deep voice even deeper now that it's laced with leftover fatigue. It makes something tingle beneath your skin.
When you seemingly give up on protesting, Felix stumbles away, probably toward the bathroom and you can't help but watch his bare butt as he does.
You'll resume your escape plan once the opportunity arises again, you think, determined to not stay here and prolong the embarrassment of your careless, drunken decisions. So, when you hear the distinct sound of water spraying from a showerhead on the other side of the wall, you inwardly pump your fist in triumph. Your chance to sneak out came easier than you thought.
But your eyelids are pretty heavy, you realize. And Felix's mattress is really soft. And the sound of him showering is kind of soothing. And before you know it, you're being swept back into an ocean of slumber.
........
Waking up again is slow, it's comfortable, it doesn't feel like suffocating in dizzying pain. You turn, hug the sheets tighter against you, head weighty where it sinks into the pillow. Sleep beckons you back into its grasp, to pull you far away from the reality of Felix's bedroom.
Shit.
You jolt upright, eyes darting around the room. Felix's room. Which you were supposed to escape from.
He is nowhere to be found. The sound of showering that lulled you to sleep is long gone, replaced with a heavy silence. The light swimming around in the room has turned a shade warmer, telling you that the morning has passed and long since turned into day. Your headache has nearly vanished and you no longer feel faint or nauseous. How long were you asleep for?
Your shirt and socks are not discarded on the floor anymore, now neatly folded on the bed beside you, next to a stack of seemingly clean clothes from, you assume, Felix's wardrobe. There's a sticky note on top of the pile and you reach over, grabbing it.
'Drink the glass of water, take a hot shower and put these on.' There's a smiley face at the end.
You look around and, indeed, a tall glass of water stands on the bedside table. Your heartbeat picks up in your chest and you feel somehow flustered, a bit overwhelmed by his kind gesture, even though it's small. It's still thoughtful.
The water isn't as cold as it probably was when Felix poured it up but it feels nice on its way down your throat, nonetheless. You don't hesitate to follow the instructions you were given, obviously abandoning your previous plan of making an escape. A shower sounds too nice, right now.
You take your time washing up, pleased to find that Felix has conditioner on his shower caddy. Less pleased when you unintentionally wonder if he only has it there for girls that he brings over, it being almost halfway emptied. You swat the thought away before the bitter taste of it can spread its way too far down your throat.
Felix's fresh, baggy clothes feel nice against your clean, moisturized skin. Much nicer than you think your clothes from last night would have felt; tight and smelly.
After hesitating for a moment, you fold the rest of your clothes and place them next to your shirt and socks on the bed, making sure to hide your panties on the bottom, in case Felix were to see. Which is admittedly a bit silly, considering that he has not only seen you naked, but been inside you. Still, you relent.
It's nerve-wracking to walk up to his bedroom door, especially when you start hearing that sounds are actually emitting from the other side of it, suggesting that he is very much there. But this makes you realize that he probably heard you showering, which means he already knows you're awake. You think that is what gives you the courage to open the door, hand slightly shaky around the handle.
You have an uninterrupted view into the open-plan kitchen from the gap formed by his door, where you quickly see Felix hard at work, engulfed by the sounds of something frying atop the stove as his back faces you. His hair looks washed now, closer to how you' see it every day at the office.'re used to seeing it every day at work.
Cautiously you move into the living space, feeling your heart jumping its way up toward you throat, climbing further with every barefooted step you take. You hate how you feel your hands trembling at your sides.
It's when you reach the closest counter that Felix happens to turn his head and see you. He's surprised for a second, before a warm smile spreads across his face, bright eyes looking you over. Your heart stutters in its climb up your trachea.
"Good morning, love. Sleep well?"
Love. Why does he think he can just call you that now?
You swallow, lick your teeth. "Um-" Your voice catches in your throat and you clear it. "Er. Fine?"
Felix's eyebrows arch skyward and you watch him purse his lips to hide his amusement, before turning to the jar in his hands. You chew your cheek, provoked.
"Hungry?" He glances your way.
You nod tentatively, noticing that eggs are what he is cooking on his frying pan.
"Coffee? Tea?" he asks, observing you expectantly.
"Um... tea?"
Again, he tries to prevent a smirk from forming across his lips, sort of failing. You think the insides of your cheeks might start to bruise from how you're chewing them.
"What's funny?" you dare asking, somehow riled by his amusement.
He cannot help but to break into a grin this time, snickering some. "Nah, it's just- You're so... I'm not used to seeing you this shy. You're usually so feisty."
You stutter in your stance, feeling your wide eyes blinking at him.
He takes in your form once more, where you're stood rigid against the corner of his counter, something fond swimming around in his eyes. "It's cute."
A blazing blush blooms across your face and your eyes turn to dart across the tiled floors, avoiding his stare at all costs. Another deep chuckle tickles your eardrums. "Shut up," you manage, but there isn't much bite in your tone.
"Yes, ma'am." You can hear the grin in his voice.
For the next five minutes or so, you watch in silence as Felix moves around his kitchen, preparing two cups of roasted green tea and plating the eggs from the frying pan. After one pinch of salt atop each egg, he places one of the plates next to you on the counter, followed by a fork and your cup of tea.
"Watch the tea, though. It's still hot. Might be best to give it a minute."
You follow his advice and reach for the fork. The two of you take your first bites in tandem. He watches you chew, then swallow. Your eyebrow rises at his shameless stare.
"Is it... edible?" he asks.
You blink, puzzled. "Yes? I- like eggs."
He nods, suddenly sheepish. "It's just- I'm not the best cook, so- Aside from the brownies I bring to the office sometimes, I- really don't make much else..." He chuckles at his own expense.
The corner of your lip twitches. "It's fine, Felix. The eggs're good," you reassure him, scolding yourself for finding his timid smile endearing.
You proceed to eat wordlessly, forks clinking against your plates as you do. You keep catching Felix looking you over, though, yet he seems unbothered by it as he doesn't stop. After about the tenth time or so, you arch another eyebrow in his direction.
"Why do- Is- What is it?"
He simply shrugs, plump lips curling upward. "Nothing. My clothes look nice on you, is all. I like it." He grins.
You feel your throat tighten and look away, unable to stop yourself from considering how many other times he has told somebody the same thing. Shaking your head, you shove the last big bite of eggs in your mouth, chewing silently with a deep crease between your brows.
"You okay?" You can hear the questioning arch of his brow in the way he asks the question.
"Fine," you mumble around the food in your cheeks.
"You sure?"
Your eyes turn to glare in his direction, meeting the slightly puzzled look on his face reluctantly. As you chew, you cannot really help the words that bubble their way up your chest, something inconvenient having formed them from somewhere in the backrooms of your mind.
Right after you swallow your bite, your mouth speaks of its own accord. "You had conditioner in your shower."
Felix blinks. "Yeah." He smiles. "It smells nice, right?"
You lick your teeth. "Is it yours?"
His head tilts sideways, making him look like a puppy. "Yeah?"
A sigh. "Is it- Was it- Ugh, never mind." You turn to your empty plate, fiddling with your fork, embarrassment catching up to you and effectively shutting you up.
"Huh? I don't get it."
Trying not to roll your eyes, you face him again, finding genuine curiosity there. It takes a while to structure the words in your head and even longer to make yourself utter them out loud.
"It's just- Usually guys don't use conditioner, especially floral ones and so... It just made me wonder. That's all."
For several long seconds, Felix simply watches you, no less confused. "If I have a girlfriend?!" He sounds mildly bewildered.
You cringe. "Not exactly..."
Silently, you watch him dissect your words in his head, turning them over, examining them closely. It's when you see a light of understanding flicker in his eyes, a delighted twitch catching at the side of his mouth, that you quickly turn away, not waiting to see the entertained smile growing on his face.
"I used to have longer hair, remember? Used bucketloads of conditioner back then. Just have some left over, now." You can hear the amusement in his voice and feel a shame-fueled heat crawling its way up to settle in your cheeks, finding that his words are making sense. "So, who'd you think I'd have it there for?"
You turn to shoot him a glare, provoked by the obvious glee shining across his features.
"Felix," you warn.
"Yes, love?"
Your heart seizes at the familiar pet name and you hate how he seems to notice, grin stretching further between his prettily freckled cheeks.
"Just- drop it," you grumble.
His head tilts to the side. "But I don't want to. I'm curious."
Your eyes narrow at him. He's unperturbed. "You know," you relent. "Just... girls."
He hums, unyielding. "Yeah, I know, but like, why'd you think that?"
Your head jerks back some, quizzically, considering the prodding look on his face. "Well, y'know, you're flirty. It just made sense for you."
It's Felix's turn to jerk his head away, seemingly taken aback. "Huh?"
You scoff dramatically, not suppressing an eyeroll this time. "Oh, come on. You flirt more than you actually work at the office. Especially with Sabae."
Felix's brows twitch. "Sabae?"
"Uh, yeah," you assert, as though it's obvious. "Literally every day. Even last night! Sometimes Laura, too. Since her desk's beside yours, I guess..."
"Laura?" He questions, but he no longer looks confused, a smirk slowly finding its way back onto his face.
"Yep. Not to mention Becky. You think it's a coincidence she always gets her coffee at the same time as you?" you ask, a bit incredulous.
"Becky," he repeats, grinning down at you.
"Yes, Becky," you confirm, unamused. "What? Are you denying it? That you're a flirt?"
"Am I not allowed to be?"
You frown, feeling somewhat caught with your pants down. "I- I didn't say that."
"Not directly, but sometimes one can say things without saying them, y'know what I mean?"
"You didn't answer," you steer the conversation back. "Are you denying that you're a flirt?"
"Are you denying that you're bothered by it?"
"You didn't even ask."
"Are you bothered by it?"
You huff and Felix keeps smiling, looking much too amused for your liking.
"I asked first."
"Will you answer if I do?"
"Fine."
"I'm not denying I'm a flirt, then."
The words catch in your throat at Felix's knowing expression. "I guess, I'm not denying it either, then."
"Denying what?"
You all but groan and he only giggles. "That it- peeves me, a little," you mumble, humiliation creeping up on you as you eye the floor beneath your curling toes.
As the delicate touch of steady fingers brush hair back behind your ear, you flinch, looking up to see Felix standing closer.
"You forgot to mention yourself, though," he points out, something soft in the way he beholds your face.
"Hm?" you question, feeling your heart skip within your rib cage.
"I flirt with you too. All the time. You haven't noticed?" He smiles, fondly.
You avert your stare again, fiddling with the soft material of the shirt draped around you. "Of course I noticed. But you flirt with everyone, so..." you shrug.
Felix mulls this over as his hand moves to hold the side of your neck, gaze shifting between your eyes before landing on your throat. His thumb brushes softly across the skin there and he watches the movement as you swallow, humming. Your mind inevitably floods with blurry images from the night before, his hands roaming your body, holding you against him, lips kissing you with a sloppy tenderness that feels too sweet as you're reminded of it. You wouldn't be able to move right now even if you wanted to, body completely frozen. But you don't want to.
"You're the one who's here, aren't you? Not them," he doesn't drop the topic, voice lower now than it was before.
"That- doesn't mean they haven't been."
"They haven't," he asserts without hesitating and by the way he says it, you're convinced he's telling the truth. The admission makes your lungs clench.
Saying nothing, he seems to await your response.
"O-kay," you give, voice small.
His sunny grin comes back, slightly lopsided, fingertips gliding gently along your skin as he lets go of you and steps back, grabbing his plate to turn toward the dishwasher.
Only once he pulls away do you realize that you're breathing heavier, and quickly force yourself into action, taking your own plate with one hand and the mug of tea with the other.
Following behind him, you watch him place his plate in the dishwasher before turning around and grabbing yours, winking at you as he does. You back away, situating yourself where the counters form a corner and take the first sip of your tea. It's nice, soothing. You think your nerves desperately need it.
Felix reaches for his own mug then, leaning sideways against the counter to face you, mirroring you as he takes a sip of his own.
"D'you like it?" he asks.
"The tea?"
"Yeah."
"Mm-hmm," you nod, honest.
He taps the side of his mug with his nails, scrutinizing you. You curl and uncurl your toes, chew your lip, anticipating what he is about to say.
"For how long has it bothered you?"
You suck in a breath, startled. "Felix," you scold.
He cannot help but smile wide. "C'mon. Humor me."
"No."
"You shoulda told me."
Your eyebrows contort. "Really? Why?"
He looks away, smile wiggling on his face. "I'd have liked to've known."
You roll your eyes, exasperated. "Of course you would've. Which is why I should've never told you, at all."
"Hey," he pouts.
Genuine unease seems to bubble somewhere in your stomach and you find yourself turning around, facing the countertop instead of the man now behind you. You feel exposed, in a way you rather would not and start doubting yourself. Even if everything Felix has said is true, it doesn't mean that your night together meant anything to him. It doesn't mean that girls from outside of the office don't frequent his place in a similar fashion to how you are now. And quite frankly, you feel a bit pathetic for even caring. You slept with a really handsome man who has got heaps of charisma, what did you expect?
"Hey," he repeats, voice smoother now, close to your ear. You stiffen as his hands find their way around your waist, underneath the fabric of his shirt, splaying themselves across your stomach. His front meets your back and you gasp quietly, shivering at his warm breath on the side of your neck. "I'm sorry," he nearly whispers, voice deeper than you knew it could be. Your nerves tingle.
His hand travels upward to hold your breast, testing the weight of it gently, squeezing it with care. Air hitches in your throat, almost making you choke.
"I'll stop," he says, fingertips teasing your perked nipple delicately. A wave of arousal shoots down between your legs and you unintentionally squeeze your thighs together.
"Wh-wha-" you question, unable to focus, to understand.
"I won't do it anymore," he clarifies, starts to leave faint kisses against your pulse, the hand not on your breast sliding downward to probe at the edge of his sweatpants hanging around your hips, his boxers. You try not to flinch but fail. He sighs into your neck.
The hand holding your mug comes down on the counter, spilling some tea over your fingers while placing it there, uncaring of it as your palms plant themselves atop the marble in an attempt to steady yourself. You sigh, sinking into Felix's frame behind you, his fingers slipping beneath the elastic of his boxers.
"W-won't do what?" you somehow remember to ask, nearly vibrating with anticipation as soft fingers weave between the short hairs surrounding your sex.
"I won't flirt with them anymore," he declares, his one hand rising past your breast to slip through the neckline of his t-shirt, digits widening to wrap around your throat, holding it gently. "I do it 'cause it's fun but I'll stop. Only you, from now on."
You can't decipher whether he means what he says or not through the fog of pleasure clouding your judgment, biting back a moan as he applies gentle pressure against your throat to make you lean your head over his shoulder. You comply, easily, putty in his hands. More warmth pools between your legs and you squirm.
"I-I'm getting your underwear all wet," you tell him, somehow apologetic despite everything. You remotely realize that Felix's manhood twitches against your ass, then.
He exhales a muted laugh into your warm skin. "Good girl."
You huff, equally unamused and aroused. "Sh-shut up." Your backtalk morphs into a whine, Felix's fingers teasing at the swollen lips surrounding your slit.
"Mmm," he hums, kissing your jaw and you shudder in his arms, needing him to touch you properly. "Want me to touch you, hm?" he asks as if he can read your thoughts, voice low over your cheek.
"Y-yeah."
Another peck against your skin. "Alright. Since you're so pretty, I will."
Finally, his fingers dip past your lips, gathering the results of your arousal before gliding gently across your clit. You jerk in his arms at the contact, enjoying the way he tightens his hold around your throat to keep you still, thighs involuntarily tightening around his hand.
"Spread your legs for me, love," he requests, fingers unmoving against your pulsing clit. "I'll make you feel good, I promise."
Shakily, you oblige. "Okay," you sigh, throat bobbing against the palm of Felix's hand as you swallow.
His digits resume their movement, tentative as they slide across your swollen nub and you can't help the tremble in your heavy breaths.
"You really are wet. And warm," Felix marvels, circling your clit softly, steadying you as you mewl in his embrace. "Uhh, I really wanna bury myself in there again," he confesses, fingers sliding down to gather more of your wetness before resuming his movements against you.
You can feel your pleasure building, burning and twisting somewhere deep within your abdomen, heavy and tangible.
"How does it feel, love?"
"G-good," you moan, helplessly grinding your cunt against the pads of his fingers as he touches you. "Fuck, uhh..."
"I know," he reassures you, trying a gentle squeeze with his grip around your throat. You whimper, overwhelmed. "You're doing so good, sweetie. Just relax, I've got you."
Your cheeks burn, likely searing against Felix's skin, heart growing with warmth at his gentle words. In the delirium of your pleasure, you find courage that you don't expect to, hidden words crawling their way up your tongue.
"Felix," you huff, breathy and needy.
"Mm?"
"I- uh, I like you."
You unmistakably feel a grin forming against your skin, Felix's arms squeezing to hold you tighter against him. "I know, my love."
His circles over your clit don't let up and before you know it, you're hurdling toward your release, muscles tightening all throughout your body.
"Oh- uh- I'm-"
"Let go, just let go. I'm here, I've got you."
And you do, seizing within his arms, eyes rolling up past your eyelids, throat tightening around a strained cry of pleasure under the firm hold of Felix's hand, heart beating aggressively in your chest as your nerves tingle euphorically. Your sex pulses against Felix's digits as he helps you ride your way through your orgasm, slowing his pace gradually into a gentle motion until your mind comes back down into reality.
Your chest heaves, body slumping helplessly into the one behind you. As your legs squeeze together and your hips jerk away, Felix lets up, slipping his hand back out of his boxers to hold you over your hip.
"How was it?" he asks, voice thick and gruff.
"M-my ears are ringing. Fingertips're tingling."
"Pretty good then." He's smiling into you still.
You sigh. "Yeah, pretty good."
Not releasing his grip, Felix grinds against your ass and you let him, still jelly in his hold. He carries what is at least a semi within the pants he's wearing, sighing a warm breath over your neck. "God, I wanna fuck you. Bend you over this counter, come inside you."
"Y-you should," you egg him on.
He only manages to groan before the sound of keys jingling catches your joint attention. You freeze together, waiting and assessing the threat before daring to make another move. And as you hear the keys being inserted in the lock of the front door, the two of you fly apart like repelling magnets. You catch yourself against the counter in front of you and Felix backs away toward the dishwasher, picking his now lukewarm mug of tea back up.
Your eyes lock across the kitchen area and yours widen, panicked. You try to ask him what to do by simply gesturing with your hands but all he can do is shrug, taking a shaky sip from the mug in his hands. You sigh, bewildered.
"It's only Hyunjin," he tries to console.
Your jaw slackens in perplexity.
You hear the front door open down the hallway, then slamming shut as you lean back to grip the counter behind you.
"Hey, Felix," comes a greeting.
You watch Felix shoot a strained smile toward his friend, who's in his line of sight but hidden from yours. It takes some effort to swallow the saliva pooling in your throat. "Hey! You're back. Didn't realize it's already two o'clock."
"What? Got up late?"
Felix shoots you a wary glance. "Eh, yeah. A little."
"Hey, everything good?" Hyunjin asks as his footsteps pad down the hallway and before you know it, his figure appears around the corner.
You freeze, as does he when he sees you. His eyes widen and you can only hope that he can't tell that your breathing is a little too ragged, cheeks a little too flushed, and you're thankful that he can't know that your ears are still kind of ringing.
"Hello," he says.
"Hi," you answer, voice meek.
His inquisitive stare shoots toward his roommate, raising a questioning brow before eyeing you again.
"Had a good trip?" Felix asks, gulping around big swigs of tea.
"Uh, yeah," Hyunjin hesitantly answers and you find yourself fidgeting under his eyes that keep jumping between you and the man that just made you come on his fingers, in their shared kitchen.
You can't for the life of you come up with something to say, stomach turning and head spinning at how somehow relaxed Felix seems already, maybe a little sheepish but not nearly as uneasy as you are, as if he already knows what is about to unfold. The cogs turning in Hyunjin's head might as well be visible as he assesses the scene before him, taking in all of your form stood in his apartment. You chew your cheek, squirming in your place in the corner.
"Ah," he finally sighs, something akin to realization dawning across his features as he smiles. He eyes his friend knowingly, hands landing on his hips. "This is the girl from work that you can't shut up about, isn't it?"
Your body goes rigid, only your eyes moving as you cast a quizzical glance in Felix's direction. There's a somewhat bashful grin on his face as he shrugs before hiding behind the lip of his mug. "Well, when you say it like that..." he mumbles, eyes averting down toward the floor.
You don't know what to call the feeling that pops and spreads in your chest, ticklish and exhilarating, a whole new wave of heat flushing on your cheeks.
Hyunjin laughs before turning to you, fully. "Well, it's good to finally meet you."
"Er, y-you too."
"M'guessing I'll be seeing a lot more of you around here, so we'll have time to get to know each other later. I'll leave you guys to it," he says, beaming as he turns and walks toward his bedroom, sharing a secret look with his friend before he disappears behind his door.
Sheepishly, Felix turns to meet your eyes and you raise an inquisitive brow at him. He simply shrugs, mouth blooming into a bright grin. You can't help but be infected, your own lips curving into a matching smile, warmth spreading from your chest and throughout the rest of your body.
Maybe your drunken mistake wasn't so much of a mistake after all.
-
copyright © 2024 woozyvee. all rights reserved.
Masterlist
MDNI
OT8:
Coming soon...
Bang Chan:
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Lee Know:
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Changbin:
Coming soon...
Hyunjin:
Coming soon...
Han:
Coming soon...
Felix:
Coming soon...
Seungmin:
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I.N:
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Hard Thoughts:
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Reactions:
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Texts:
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(So far this looks terrible but I'll edit once I get the hang of this lol)
If you would like to submit any requests please do, I'd be happy to answer them!
Yoo I was wondering if you could write a fic with a FtM reader with a poly relationship with Felix and Changbin. It could be purely fluff but if you want it could lead to smut :> Of course take your time with writing it.
JUST THE WAY U R
Paring: Felix x Changbin x FTM reader
Genre: Slight angst, Fluff
Requested
More: Masterlist
A/n: Sorry for the delay, I wanted to write this as best as possible.
M/n, a member of the famous K-pop group Stray Kids, was curled up in the fetal position on his bed, clutching his lower abdomen in agony. His usually bright eyes were bloodshot from the pain, and beads of sweat trickled down his forehead. He hated this. He hated the way it hurt, the way it made him feel weak, the way it made him feel like a freak. No one knew about this, not even his two boyfriends, Felix and Changbin. They loved him, he knew they did, but they didn't know the secret he had been carrying around for years.
M/n was a female-to-male transgender, and he had gotten top surgery. It was supposed to make him feel more comfortable in his own skin, but it hadn't helped with the periods. They still came, still made him feel like shit, still reminded him of the life he had left behind. And now, as he lay there in pain, he couldn't help but wish that he could just get rid of them altogether.
His two boyfriends, Felix and Changbin, were both in the next room, talking in hushed tones. They had noticed something was wrong and had come to check on him. They were so sweet, so caring, but they didn't know the truth. They didn't know about his past. And he wasn't sure if he was ready to tell them yet.
M/n's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of their voices growing louder. They were coming into his room, concern etched on their faces. "Love, what's wrong?" Felix asked, kneeling beside the bed. Changbin moved to sit behind M/n, resting his hands on his shoulders.
M/n took a deep breath, trying to steel himself for their reactions. "I-I got my period," he stammered. "It hurts really bad." There, he'd said it. The words were out in the open now. He braced himself for their judgment, for them to tell him that they didn't want to be with him anymore.
But instead, Felix and Changbin's faces softened. They exchanged a look before turning back to M/n. "Oh, love," Felix breathed, reaching out to gently stroke his hair. "I'm so sorry. That must hurt so much." Changbin nodded in agreement, his expression full of sympathy. "We're here for you, no matter what."
M/n felt a lump form in his throat. He didn't expect them to react this way. They didn't seem disgusted or angry or disappointed. They just looked worried and concerned. A tiny, hopeful part of him began to wonder if maybe they could still love him, even with this secret.
"Here," Felix said, carefully taking M/n's hand and pressing something warm and soft into it. "It's a heating pad. It should help with the cramps." He reached over and placed another object on the bedside table. "And I brought you your favorite food and drink. You should eat something, love. It'll make you feel better."
M/n looked up at Felix, his eyes brimming with tears. "Thank you," he whispered. "You don't have to take care of me."
Felix smiled gently. "Yes, we do. We love you, and we want to make you feel better. Now, why don't you eat something, and I'll help you with the heating pad?"
M/n couldn't help but smile back, feeling a bit embarrassed. "Okay," he said, taking the food and drink from Felix. As he ate, the warmth from the heating pad began to seep into his lower abdomen, and he couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief. It felt so good to finally be comfortable.
Felix and Changbin continued to hover over him, making sure he was okay and offering words of encouragement. They told him that it was normal for trans men to still get periods, and that they would always love him no matter what. M/n couldn't help but feel a sense of relief wash over him. Maybe this wasn't the end, maybe they could still have a future together.
As the pain began to subside, M/n found himself growing more and more aware of the affection they were showing him. The way they looked at him with such love and understanding, the way they touched him so gently, it was all so overwhelmingly sweet. He couldn't help but feel grateful to have them in his life.
The afternoon passed slowly, with the three of them curled up on the bed, watching movies and sharing bites of food. It felt so nice to just be together, to not have to hide any part of himself from them. M/n couldn't help but marvel at how comfortable he felt with Felix and Changbin. They were the only ones who truly understood what he was going through, and they never once made him feel ashamed or alone.
I love this sm 😭😭 you write so, so well!
rewrite the ending in every lifetime・l.f
—From the moment Felix saw you drawing your dreams in the sand, he knew you were a daughter of the seas, with frozen fingers and feelings like the tide. So when the waves rush overhead, he will place his soul upon your tongue so your hollow heart can finally feel the warmth of the sun.
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠・felix x mommy issues!reader 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞𝐬・angst, smut, a collection of moments the two of you have ever wanted to say I love you, his vow to find your soul in every lifetime, elutions to supernatural connections of humans hearts 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬・8.1k 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬・The reader had mommy issues that are heavily described, manipulation, verbal abuse, references to physical abuse but it really isn't described, love bombing, alcoholism, references to blades and knives, sweet PIV sex, an ungodly amount of crying, panic attacks, there are some potentially disturbing descriptions in this honestly, uhh pregnancy and proposals (its really cute I promise) 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬 ・If you want to see the preview for this story look here 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ・Family Line by Conan Gray, If the World Was Ending by Jp Saxe and Julia Michaels, The Night We Met by Lord Huron, Cover Me by Our Beloved Stray Kids, Evergreen by Richy Mitch & The Coal Miners.
𝐚/𝐧・I have poured my heart and soul into this fic; I hope it heals you how it healed me.
i. It is the wounds we hide from the light that beg most to be seen.
Age 12.
Scene one.
The sand feels like stardust as you glide your hands across the sky, your frozen fingers tracing the edge of an anguished cry.
lair.
You write in scribbled chicken scratch,
lair.
lair.
lair.
You wipe it all away.
The ruthless afternoon sun glares off the playset before you, stabbing through your eyelids. You actually have to squint to make out any of the children shrieking and playing on the variety of scattered sets; a few push and shove each other on the slides, while the quiet, more reserved ones sit silently on the swings. Some were climbing on the monkey bars, others spinning on the merry-go-round, and then there was you, 12-and-a-half, drawing their sorrows in the sandbox.
You don't even know why you come here anymore. It almost makes you chuckle, imagining how others must see you—too old, too tall, too out of place to be sitting in a snot-infested box that smelled like the remnants of many, many nasty toddlers.
Though, as silly as it seemed, you needed an escape, an outlet to channel all this burning rage. You wanted to flip the world inside out, turn it around and upside down; shake it, shake it, shake it untill humans finally had some common sense. I mean, really, how could they not see it? How could anybody not see it?
The worst part of it is you don’t even have a reason to be mad. You hadn’t argued, you hadn’t fought, she hadn’t hit you, hadn’t taken away your stuff. No, that isn’t why you were mad.
You were mad because she's a liar.
A big, fat, ugly, fucking liar.
Her love only ever pools at the tip of a knife, the glint of all your hopes and dreams; It shimmers and shines in the overhead lights, in the cloud of the crowd’s ceaseless cheers. See it, look everyone, I'm great. Her hands cover their eyes. Look, world, she's trying. Do you see it? She's trying. She's trying, you're crying, and the world only ever applauds.
You sigh, smacking your hands on your thighs. You were inches away from combusting—Your emotions, like unreleased electricity, coalescing in the pit of your gut, one wrong spark away from exploding.
Why couldn't anybody see it?
An earsplitting screech of pure bliss pierces your eardrums as you snap your neck up. It wasn’t really hard to pinpoint the noise, figuring every few beats it would happen again. The sound was home to a little girl with blond braided hair and a smile that rivaled the sun, but it wasn’t her that caught your attention the most—It was the boy behind her, gently pushing her on the swings. Your heart skips in your chest; he was beautiful, the unique type of pretty, the kind that’s utterly humane. He had sprays of freckles and cheeks that permanently crinkled in a grin.
Who was he?
Perhaps it was Cupid’s feathered wings that tickled the boy’s chin up, because as soon as your gaze lifts, he inadvertently steps into a patch of light—his amber irises seeming to be encrested with honeyed seaglass, a phenomenon only created by the restless tumbling of a thousand folded seas; and even with an ocean of blinding afternoon sun, his eyes still found you.
Well, now that you really think about it, you were staring at him first, so it really isn’t as magical as your brain makes it up to be. But still—
You feel your lips part, your stomach flipping upside down. You would have usually been embarrassed, caught staring at such a beautiful boy, but you were floored, utterly flummoxed. Cupid drew his stringed bow, and with a flick of a finger, your heart was ensnared.
Subconsciously, you slip your hand into your front pocket, your thumb running over the smooth surface of a million different frosted bottles.
You found comfort in the concept—how easily humans discarded their broken trash, and in the excruciating process of being shattered, crushed, destroyed, the sea smoothed out their jagged edges. It was not their gruesome end; no, it was their birth.
Their birth into something so captivating so unique—
You were seaglass.
You wanted to be seaglass.
You were way too young to be thinking about the phenomenon of the ocean and the wisdoms of the world.
He was nothing less than breathtaking as his nose crinkled, the corners of his eyes disappearing into crescent moon-shaped slits. He was staring at you the same way one would look at an adorable puppy that just fell straight on its ass.
Oh, well, here comes the embarrassment. It hits you like a semi-truck, reality slamming into you harder than the tonnage before. There you were, sticky in sweat-caked sand, shifting through dirt and grime like a grody toddler, and there he was, innocently playing with what is probably his kid sister, looking perfect and beautiful and impossibly unsweaty.
Like, actually, how is he not sweating? It’s at least a million degrees out here. He catches your eyes again, his grin slowly forming into some (mysterious) mix between curious and mischievous. He eases the swing to a stop. The little girl grumbles in protest before he leans down into her ear, whispering something that makes her smile and nod, innocently toddling off into the abyss of grass and giggles.
You wonder why he stopped playing with her—that is until he starts walking over to you.
You had never, in all your 12 years of existence, heard a voice so naturally inviting—like the tender lullaby of whispering rain.
"Hi, my name's Felix. What's yours?"
Your lips formed around the letters—the way they fit so perfectly in your mouth.
In every lifetime, you turned the words on your tongue like a promise forgotten in the stars.
In every lifetime I will find you.
With jarring familiarity, you take his extended hand, blushing profusely when he asks if he can take a seat, you almost tweak a muscle nodding with such enthusiasm.
And in every lifetime, I will make you mine.
ii. I could find your soul in the sky because yours is the only one that smells like home.
Age 16.
Scene two.
"You look like shit," Felix teases, a pencil lodged firmly between his teeth; he was obnoxiously chipper for a Monday morning in math class.
You roll your eyes, tossing your backpack onto the floor of the classroom with a heavy-handed flick.
"Fuck off and die," you smile, slumping into your seat.
Felix lets out a forceful laugh, shocked by your abrupt hostility. His mouth stays agape far into the droning silence, his brain scrambles into damage control when you lack an immediate explanation.
“Come on now, is that any way to talk to your best friend?” He showcased his obnoxiously large smile with the bottoms of his palms in a gesture that said, Look at me. His goofy antics would usually make you at least grin, but today you were the very epitome of exhausted, swimming in a vat of thickening cement. You just wanted to melt into the comfort of your fluffy sheets—
The room erupts in a cacophony of screaming voices and roaring laughter.
Why must humans be so loud?
You groan, scooting your chair so close to Felix your bodies are practically smooshed together. If it bothered him, he didn't show it—or maybe you were too tired to notice. Either way, you drop your head onto the dip of his shoulder, his heat wrapping around you like a threadbare blanket—just enough warmth to dull the bite of a chill, but never enough to melt the ice.
"Somebody's tired," he coos with a hint of concern, slipping an arm over your shoulders. You nod, mumbling something along the lines of "tired" and "understatement." Your eyelids flutter shut to the sound of his heartbeat, and even under the bright fluorescent lights, everything starts to dim.
That is until your teacher shakes you awake, rudely plunging you back into the land of the living. You blink a few times, Felix's face a blur. You clear your throat. Your teacher was a short lady with a smile like a snob and her hair styled in a bob. She was loud and callous, with the temper of an obnoxious lapdog. You dig your palms into your eyes until your vision is painted in Picasso.
"We have a test today, L/N. I would sit up if I were you," she says, tossing two packets onto the desk, she flicks her eyes between the two of you, before pursing her lips like a woman clutching her pearls.
Of course.
Of fucking, fuckudy, fucking, course.
Of all the days.
Most of your night was encased in a bubble of beer, the stench of anguish, and the echo of wet cries. Your mother insisted on proving her godliness until the sun came up, for she, the untouchable essence of perfection, could never be wrong.
You nodded in and out of consciousness, only ebbing along the edge of the ocean before the tide pulled away.
You just wanted to sleep.
"Hey, wake up," Felix says, softly nudging you awake. His touch is feather-light, but it feels like the stab of a thousand sharpened pencils, the way your annoyance flares up.
"No," you croak, the lights like little lanterns reflecting off the surface of your tears. He hesitates for a moment, his tender hand leaving your skin for just enough time to make you crave it more.
"You have to wake up, or you're going to fail the test." He mumbles, gently lacing his fingers through your hair.
"I don't care anymore." You were traipsing on a tightrope with a body made of glass. You slip, you fall, you risk it all to tumble into his embrace. You felt it in your bones, the way he smelled like home, and you'd give anything to have it back.
Just once.
"Please," you whisper. It grates in his ears like gravel, your watery lashes cracking his heart in two.
You wanted to go home.
He pauses, narrowing his eyes in indecision before biting his lip and turning to scan Mrs. Womperbottom. You sit impatiently, bouncing your legs up and down. He flicks his stare to you, all your eye bags and smudged makeup, with that, his gaze softens, face melting into a small smile.
"Okay." He concedes, taking your body into his hands, carefully nuzzling your head to sit snug on the curve of his chest. You were so glad to sit in the back, especially as the world fades to black.
"I expected far more from you, young man."
It had been a few days since you fell asleep in Felix's arms, opting to turn in a blank packet rather than fight the urge to skydive without a parachute. Your brows furrow as your teacher frowns in disappointment. Felix, whose cheeks turn red as his eyes grow wide—equal parts panic and regret—seems to know exactly what's going on.
She flips the packet around. His fingers wrap around the paper, never turning it to see the depth of the damage. Only when he hastily unzips his bag, do you notice in the frenzy of movement—
A thick red F at the front.
Your jaw goes slack, lips gaping ever so slightly. He doesn’t meet your gaze, even when the room erupts in a deafening ring, chairs screeching as people scamper out. Your eyes blur like the lens of an old camera, faulty with the ages of time.
Carefully, you turn your page.
A
Your mouth is filled with sand.
You never did the test.
You flick through the edges of oblivion.
Every answer.
Every circle.
He did your test for you.
It was the sheer selflessness of his act that threw you for a loop—how a man who could have the whole world at the tip of his fingers could also be so impossibly kind.
That was a feat you believed no human was capable of, cynicism long engraved into your DNA. Your own blood was indebted to your mother, so how could a man with no inherent obligation to you, show such devotion?
"In the scars of sea glass, you will find your answer," the stars whispered.
"He loves you," the universe says.
"Do not doubt his intentions," time tells. "His soul has already found you in every lifetime."
iii. There are so many things in the world that must first collapse before it is born; why do we not believe humans are the same way?
Three months ago.
Scene Three.
Playing: The Night We Met.
"I love you, you know that, right, baby?" your mother slurs, her words tangled in a cloud of stale beer. She called you in a fit of drunken giggles, professing her undying ardor, wedged between passive pleas to come pick her up.
Something deep inside you screams as her arm wraps around your waist, the voice you fought to hide, it sounds and pounds at the walls of your ribs.
Not again, please.
You had spent so much of your life tangled in her web of lies, pulling at every poisoned thread.
Mirror, mirror on the wall, how many different ways can I make my daughter fall?
“I love you so, so much,” she cocoons your cheeks in comforting hands, and almost for a minute, you fall into the fuzz, into the black and blurry buzz of the mix between right and wrong.
She does not love you.
She loves your reflection and how it so greatly mirrors hers.
You were an extension of herself, the one she holds, the one she molds, her fingerprints sticking in the sand.
Brick by brick, she builds you up.
Mirror, mirror on the wall, how many different ways can I make my daughter fall?
She loves you, she says.
But she is in love with a mirror, the shattered glass of a battered reflection, the one that can never improve.
For she is too great in her empty state; she has nothing to prove.
You will never change a woman made of stone.
You will only ever break your bones.
So you drop the remote
with an echoing plop
and let all her love leak out.
You don’t really love me, do you?
Just pretend one more time.
Just one more time.
You drag her stumbling figure up a grueling flight of stairs. She giggles and hiccups when one of her feet catches on the edge of a step.
Her eyes are clouded as you lower her onto the bed. She caresses your cheek with silky fingers.
You relapse.
Rewind.
“Come lay with me, baby.”
You don’t cry, don’t die as the tip of her knife digs into the skin of your thigh.
You collapse into the warmth of her covered arms, shrouded with the lies of alcohol.
Brick by brick.
You nuzzle your head deeper into her neck.
She builds you up.
Just one more time.
She curls her hands around your heart.
I love you.
Your mother was too in love with herself to find room in her heart to love you.
Your tears taste like sorrow when they seep onto your tongue, cascading down your shuddering lips like the bullets of rain that whip across your face, dripping into your sodden shirt. Your heart was burdened by paradox, the overwhelming tonnage of utter desolation; you sink your fingers into your chest as if breaking the surface of snow, searching for any sign of humanity.
Perhaps it was fate's gentle hand that guided you from stumbling through your mother's desolate driveway to softly rapping your knuckles on Lee Felix's front door, cause the moment your weary feet touched his familiar steps, something stirred deep within. In a multiverse of infinite universes, it felt as though every timeline suddenly collided, merging to form this pivotal moment in your history—the story of you and him. The mere thought made you question its legitimacy, until the door creaked open, and suddenly, everything you'd almost forgotten came rushing back.
It was the disheveled state of his hair that you notice first—tousled atop his head like a misty halo; his eyes were heavy-lidded, foggy with frosted sea glass. You choke back a sob; the sunlit streetlights really do him wonders.
The moment you step into his line of sight, he can sense something is wrong. You're soaked to the bone, though the rain is barely coming down; your eyes glazed with a grief so acute it resonates in his very core.
He reaches a hand out—
"Y/N, what happened?"
You unravel; your knees giving out, all the energy spent on keeping yourself upright diffuses into an agonizing sob. Your hands find purchase on his steady shoulders as you threaten to collapse straight into the wet patio floor.
The universe had split apart, the sky falling down. You were crumbling, caught in between thick chunks of earth; you couldn’t breathe—
you gasp
The weight of a quivering world crashes into your chest, an earthquake erupting at the base of your spine. You were the daughter of destruction, bleeding with the wrath of humanity's woe.
Wordlessly, Felix chases your agony down, drawing you gently into his embrace. You had rehearsed your excuses all the way here, but when his arms wrap around your waist, the lies soak straight back into your throat.
Settled atop folded thighs, his free hand moves; lacing his fingers around the nape of your neck. His lips like life, pressing into the cold, dead skin of your outer shell; he grazes the apple of your cheek, the slope of your nose, the flat of your forehead, the tremble in your hand; and at last, with hooded eyes, his gaze finds your mouth. You are an amalgamation of quivering limbs, your bones like leaves; he locks his strength around the base of your spine, palms steading you from the outside in.
And yet, you lament, how desperately you wanted his lips to form around your flesh with the irrevocable promise of always, but you know the ramifications of such a thing; you were the embodiment of devastation, born with a blade in your hand, you would only ever hurt him. He did not deserve that. So instead of chasing your dreams, you chase the solitude of his skin, firm against your cheek.
"I'm here." He is—through it all. Through every violent hiccup and every hushed sob, Felix stays with you, fierce hands anchoring you back into reality. Finally, after lifetimes locked in this position, you find the strength to plead, "Do you think we could go somewhere?"
I would go anywhere with you, is what he wants to say.
“Of course,” is what he does.
A muted smile tugs at the corners of your cheeks, and with every labored rise of your chest, he fights the urge to hook his hand underneath your jaw, sucking all your pain into his lips. He doesn't. Instead, he lifts you up and follows his feet wherever your soul wants to take him.
He hooks his ardency on the sun as it starts to sink low. The world is dipped in darkness, perforated by the warmth of a cratered moon. Déjà vu follows you down the dark, dirt-paved road, marked by children's footsteps. Your heavy steps stop, mouth forming around the shape of a suffocated gasp. The trees rustle in the breeze, the wind slapping against the metal of a misty memory.
You had never, in all your 12 years of existence, heard a voice so naturally inviting—like the tender lullaby of pattering rain.
"Hi, my name's Felix. What's yours?"
Your lips formed around the letters—the way they fit so perfectly in your mouth.
In every lifetime, you turned the words on your tongue like a promise forgotten in the stars.
He remembered.
He really remembered.
Felix could never forget.
"Well, what are you waiting for? Come on!" he calls out, breaking into a backward jog, his smile beckoning you closer to the swings.
And with a swipe of his hand, you have already left your afflictions on the imprint of your shoes. Cold rubber hits you first, your thighs bouncing into the seat. His fingers latch around the frame of your waist, thrusting you into the air.
You laugh with the resonance of lost youth.
Time slips from your fingers like dust, forgotten in the way you had drifted from the swings to the slides, only to circle back again. It wasn’t until your skin had brushed every corner of the park that you found yourself lying on the damp earth, sinking deeper into the solace of Felix’s chest. His heart hums like the rhythm of a song so intimate, you could recite the whole melody from just the first note.
Stars blink overhead, still—sparkling, spread across the sky like golden thread sewn into rippling silk. You first settle into comfortable silence, both equally at peace, but the heavy burden of unspoken questions leaks into the calm air; forcing you to speak.
Softly, weakly, you tell him about your fears, about how much you hate her, how much you hate loving her, and how much you want to rip out every helix of her DNA.
Felix doesn't respond for a long time after this, inhaling your confessions with all the deference you deserve. Your heart slams into the slats of your ribs, shaky breaths forced into the balmy summer breeze. There was something so potently terrifying about voicing your issues, especially after masking them for so long; your pain splintered across the ground like the most fucked-up stained glass—as though Felix could sense your building anxiety, he kisses the crown of your head, murmuring into your hair:
"Even the moon hides parts of herself from the sun."
At that moment, with overwhelming certitude, you knew—even littered with secrets and scars, his rays would kiss whatever side you wished to show.
"In every lifetime," you plead through tear-stained lashes.
Maybe in another universe, you could be easy to love.
“In every lifetime.” Aged fingers run the length of your soul, tracing the vow 'I do.' In every lifetime, he would find you—broken or whole, with the sky falling, the sea sinking, the world tumbling down.
"Stay with me," you whisper to the wind as the stars start to dim.
"Always." He will find you in every lifetime and love every mangled piece.
The ocean.
You are wrapped in its cool embrace. The shore hums with soft lullabies as the wind whips across the water. Amorphous mist floats along the top of the sand, shrouding it in a dreamlike shade. Your fingers are formless as they dip into the darkness. Something sparkles. You lift your gaze.
Sea glass.
It’s basked in warm moonlight, buried in a fissure of the earth. You collapse onto the ground, your knees quivering as frantic fingers dig into the land.
Your hands are cold, holding something so old. You flip the smooth stone.
I love you.
You run your thumb over the inscription.
I love you.
It is only through the tumbling of a thousand folded seas that sea glass can even come to be, and maybe, that is how your soul found me.
You wake up in a bed that isn't your own with the warmth of the sea and the smell of home.
I love you.
iv. Just once, let him rewrite the story; just once, he promises you will never have to watch the same ending again.
Present day.
Scene four.
Playing: Cover Me.
The screen flickers off.
The velvet curtains close.
The world fades to black.
The End
Your ribs crack open, heavy sobs echoing through the gaps of your unfolded bones. Your hands make purchase around your shredded soul, the warm liquid of your sorrows trickling through your splayed fingers like the shadow's phantom finger tracing the lines of your melancholy, dusting over the hill of your cheeks.
One more time.
Just one more time.
You rewind the tape-
The velvet curtains stutter open.
The screen flashes white.
Just one more time.
How many times could you watch the same movie before you realized the ending would never change?
You rewind the tape-
How many times could you lick her love off the edge of a knife before you realize the blade will never dull?
You slide the tip across your tongue-
Just one more time.
Please.
Just pretend to love me one more time.
"For once, can you admit that you're wrong?" you snap, attempting to steady your rising voice.
You've been arguing with your mother for centuries, breath grating across your throat like grains of sand. It took every shred of mental stability not to bash your head into the wall.
"I did what I had to do to teach you discipline; you were unruly-"
"I was nine!" you shout, a weak, wounded cry. "Nine!"
How could she not see that?
"I did it because I loved you."
Where did the argument even begin? You search the past 30 minutes, all the way from the start, sitting on the couch with Felix, The Princess Bride playing in the background. Your ringing phone cuts through the movie. He tells you to answer it. You do. What happened after that? Your head is foggy with hurt, time forced into an everlasting circle of the same issues.
"Maybe you should reevaluate your definition of love."
"Maybe you should have just been a better daughter."
The signal of an ended call rings through your ears as the world fades to black.
The velvet curtains close.
The screen flickers off.
The movie sputters to a stop.
The End
You are far too entranced with the stillness of your spine to hear the door creak open, Felix’s hesitant footsteps carefully creep closer. It is only when he mumbles a soft, saturnine "sweetheart" that you finally feel something-
"How did it go?" Felix believed the strings of your souls were so intertwined, the two of you experienced emotions the way an instrument feels the thrum of a cord; but as your heart pumps with an intangible amount of anguish, maybe even for you, some feelings were simply too subjective to share.
Wordlessly, thoughtlessly, your hand chases his touch, a million different uncompleted sentences dissipating as soon as your skin connects; your fingers beg, hold me, even as your mouth shutters shut, dusty rivulets cascading across your cheeks.
You were empty.
so, so, very empty-
Felix's hands lock underneath the bend of your knees, steady arms curling around the small of your back, and in a gentle flow of movements, he cradles you against his chest.
You rewind the tape.
Just one more time.
"Please," you have lived so much of your life caught in a perpetual state of emptiness, for once, you wanted to remember what your body was like before your mother bore you with the heavy burden of broken wings.
"Touch me," shaky fingers cling to him, pleading with so much of your soul none is left to protest. He gasps into your neck, his face scrawled with worry, the etch of a thousand different fears drawn into the deep lines of his forehead.
Just once
Let him rewind the film
Just once
You will never have to watch the same ending again.
"Are you sure this is what you want?" Though his words are unsure, his actions tell a different story; tender hands massage the tops of your thighs, reluctantly begging you to open up, to unfold your deformed ribs, where he will fill your hollow bones with the type of love you have only ever yearned for.
"I need you."
You need him more than you need your heart to beat, your lungs to breathe; you need him more than you need the birds, the bees, the ground, the trees—
Your frantic fingers smooth around the base of his neck, further blurring the line of friendship; and in one sharp movement, he takes a sledgehammer to any hope of going back. Your lips collided with the zeal of years lost to silent longing, a kiss that unfurled all time and space, bursting with the passion of hearts starving for connection.
He would not hurt you-
Please, collapse into him, just once-
Let him prove that you will never have to fall again-
This could ruin everything, and yet he lays you upon the silken sheets with such soulful kindness your glassy eyes threaten to break; his heart thrums with the vow of I'll make you fly. His hand dips into the band of your shorts, pleasure peeking out from the shadows of your mind, only ever bobbing its head long enough to fill your skin with a minute tingling sensation—like running your hands under hot water after a long day in the snow, but it was not enough.
"Felix, I need you," His eyes widen slightly, features stricken with a sudden tightness, a burdened tonnage; you were handing him your heart with the hope his hands weren't made of blades, and the idea of the utter trust you have put in him to do that makes his stomach flip.
Just once—
He will prove it all to you.
"As you wish," Not even 20 minutes ago you were sitting on the couch watching the greatest love story ever told, and now, here you are living it. How did you get so lucky? It's unfathomable how attentive he manages to be, his nose nudging the slope of your neck before laying a peck on your collarbone. His mouth never leaves your flesh even as he slowly strips off layer after layer of fabric.
"I want to see all of you" Now it was your turn, taking his time removing your clothes. His fingers slide across your skin with a delicate intimacy, a tender reverence; his lips tracing the lines of your seams until your very atoms are etched with his name.
I hate her
I love you
I love you
I love you
He coupled every leak of anger with a river of love, kissing your limbs until all your body could remember was the pureness of his ardor.
"Are you ready?" he whispers, lining himself with your entrance, all he needs is a word to finally sink himself in. Your eyes are glossy, gazing up at him with such an unadulterated passion, a pure amount of pain—this will tear you apart, and he promises with every fiber of his being, he will put you back together.
"Yes." You have lived most of your life with the heavy burden of a body’s broken wings, and it isn't until Felix’s crafted hands finally crease your ribs that you realize origami can only emerge when you fold it up, the way a bird can only fly when it falls.
You are an amalgamation; so much of your soul is lost in his lips you don't know where he begins and you end, but when a rush of pleasure tingles up your spine, you don't care.
The world is tangled somewhere on the edge of in-between space and time, melding together into a mushy, gushy substance that slips through your fingers as they lace in his raven locks. You pour all your pain into the slit of his lips, where he sucks in every drop, leaving no room for your protests.
Your head is empty, airy, only tethered to the earth by one dangerous thought:
I love you. You did. You have; in every timeline; in every universe; in every lifetime; you have loved him, and you knew with all your heart, he felt the same.
“I love you.” The words slip off your tongue, dripping into his mouth like melting snow. You had fallen in love with existence itself—a boy with a soul made of sun and eyes like sea glass. A man whose strings reached across every plane of time to find you. His fingers still, a soft burst of air puffing into your cheeks.
For minutes, hours, Felix can only stare, his strangled breaths wafting over your chin. You gulp, at least five differently worded apologies tangling themselves on your tongue. He doesn’t let you speak. Instead, he brings his hands to either side of your face, resting his forehead against your own; on your lips, not fear, but instead, words.
"Say it again," he urges, kisses split by the warmth of a starlit smile.
"I love you, Lee Felix." you share the galaxy in between your lips.
His arms slip around your waist, drawing you impossibly closer; there are no limits, no constraints when he captures your shuddering gasp. He has waited years to hear those words, so with a breathy rasp, he begs, "Tell me you love me, tell me until you are sick of it."
"I love you," you repeat, beginning to laugh. "I love you. I love you, fuck, Felix, there has never been a time where I haven't loved you."
The passion that surged in the twists of your heartbeats began to be too much to bear; his hips ruthlessly rutting into yours, you cry out, chasing the edge of a daydream. So close, so close, so—you can only hear the crash of your soul shattering before his ginger fingers sew you back together.
You both slam down into the earth at the same time, holding each other's tired bodies as the ground swallows you up.
His arms lock around your head, quivering as he struggles to hold himself up, droplets of tears land on your cheeks as they drip down the slope of his nose. He was so perfect-
so, so, very perfect.
Your mouth raises to kiss a tear clinging to the tip of his nose. He chokes, squeezing his eyes shut. You both are thrumming with tension, overflowing with emotion; before you can even blink, he is pulling you to his chest, naked and sticky, he holds you closer than you have ever been.
"I love you." He cups your trembling cheeks, throat tightening around the earnestness in his tone. You can run from the stars; you can hide from the bay, but his love will find you just as the sun finds the day.
v. She is only in your DNA.
Five months later.
Scene five.
Playing: If the world was ending.
Anxiety is like a cup that never falls, the tease of water sloshing at the rim. It comes in inclines—the clench in your chest, the flip in your stomach, the tremble in your spine. The world begins to quake, the table tips, the water shifts, but none of it ever pours out.
That was how you felt right now, a bright pink river rushing underneath your feet, sinking deeper and deeper into the abyss.
No matter how many times you squeezed your eyes and wished it all away, reality still managed to smack you in the face.
Positive
Your numb hand goes limp, the plastic pregnancy test tumbling to the tiles with a deafening crack. Cold porcelain seeps into your skin as you drop your tear-stained cheeks between your knees, all your deepest, darkest fears suddenly snapping into view.
"Just wait until you have kids." Sometimes, it is the most overpowering emotions you can feel most clearly.
Determination.
"One day, when I grow up, I'll meet the perfect guy, and get married, and have tons of babies—and I will do it all without ever becoming you." She scoffs, rolling her shoulders as if she had already unraveled the scrolls of your soul, and engraved on the paper was your life, traveled down a perfectly mirrored path.
"I said the same thing when I was your age, but then I had the kids, and everything changed. You aren't going to be able to do it."
You were only 13 then, and yet, with unwavering resolve, you declared, "Watch me."
How were you going to tell him? Was your first thought.
How could you manage to be a mother? Was your next.
You dug your hands into your chest, wishing to tear your seams. In her womb, she had stitched you up, and now you spent every waking moment trying to unravel the threads.
You wanted to vomit—vomit until your blood ran dry, until it curdled around your muscles, trembling over the cold toilet seat.
"Watch me," you had said.
"Watch me fall apart" is what you had meant.
So she does, through the blurred layers of your reflection, her eyes staring back. Why did you have to bear such an eerie resemblance to her? The power she held over you was suffocating, for even in thought, she found ways to claw at your lungs.
Mirror, mirror, on the wall, how many different ways can I make my daughter fall?
It's been hours.
Many, many hours before Felix finds you huddled beside the toilet bowl. Your dead eyes stare—just stare. Not blinking. Not moving. Not twitching an inch. His reaction is almost instant; he drops to his knees, jerking you towards himself. He grips your pale cheeks, begging you to look at him—just once. Blink. Flinch. Move something. Finally, finally, like little butterfly wings, your eyelids flutter to life. Before you can even speak, he's yanking your head onto his chest, his heart pounding vehemently inside the thin fabric of his cotton T-shirt.
Though every cell in your body screams at you to stay, you withdraw. Your gaze is laden when it lands on him, and for a moment, he is taken aback—that is, until you slip a slim white object into his palms.
Silence.
That is what precedes your actions. He stuffs your heart into a meat grinder, and with every excruciating minute that passes, it feels like he cranks it up one level higher. He reads the result over and over, breaking it down to syllables, letters—backwards, forwards, flipped upside down. Part of him didn't believe it—not that he didn't want to believe it, but simply because he couldn't. It felt impossible, improbable, really. His tongue twisted into knots between his teeth, rendering him utterly speechless. So instead, with trembling fingers, he grasps your wet jaw and pours all his thoughts into the line of your lips.
It came out a little something like: I love you
The whiplash is dizzying, like stepping into pounding rain and spinning; spinning, spinning, spinning until it feels like you'll twirl right off the earth. How could you believe that he’d reject you? It was so colossally stupid you almost want to smack yourself in the face—not that Felix would let you, of course.
You gasp at the same moment he sniffles, your synchrony causing him to chuckle, the sound thick with tears. He lays his forehead on yours, a disbelieving smile cracking across his cheeks.
"I'm going to be a dad," he utters, already envisioning all the adventures ahead. Hell, he was practically braiding his baby girl's hair right now. He seems to catch up with this reality because, with a sudden jerk, he has locked his hands underneath your armpits, hauling you into the air. You squeal, clutching his shoulders so tightly your nails dig in; it doesn't faze him—not when his head is tilted back, his smile like the edge of an everlasting sunrise. In that moment, as the bathroom swirls, you know, it was only with him your baby could view their reflection through the shattered glass of a broken cycle; and that is an accomplishment worth celebrating. At last, you begin to laugh.
Once you have begun, you don’t stop—not even when he gently sets you down, giggling as you sway, foggy and disoriented, his hands firmly steadying you by the shoulders. When you find enough balance to walk, you clasp urgent fingers around his wrist, drawing him to the bed. He happily follows. Calves hitting the frame, you fall backward, bouncing onto the mattress. With a dimpled grin, he crawls over your waist, littering kisses all over your face, leaving wet, slobbery marks. Laughter spills out of you uncontrollably, groaning when he licks up your cheek.
"Ewww, Lix, that was gross!" you giggle, wrinkling your nose in faux disgust. All of a sudden, as the overhead lights catch the bands of your eyes, it feels as though his breath has been ripped straight from his lungs—a stunning epiphany dawning on him.
He could reach across every timeline in an infinite multiverse of parallel realities, and yet, he still wouldn’t find a version of himself as in love with you as he is right now.
So, he does something crazy.
"I wanted to wait for the right time to do this," he utters, his face tight with masked emotion. "And I promise, one day I'll buy you something flashier." Your brows furrow, your heart pounding wildly in your chest, about as confused as you are nervous—especially when he slides down the bed, halting to leave a kiss atop the fabric of your covered belly. His nose bumps your stomach when he peers up at you through tear-stained lashes. "But for now, I wanted to ask for your heart with something meaningful—something that means forever."
Every atom buzzes with anticipation when he dips to one knee, digging a finger into his pocket. Finally, he fishes a small velvet box from the confines of his pocket. Your hands fly to your face, shielding a choked sob. "Will you marry me, Y/N L/N? Will you let me love you in every lifetime?" He flips open the lid, and as if you were dipping into the well of time, nestled in the silky cushions was amber sea glass—your amber sea glass. For years, it burned a hole in your pocket, anchoring you to the ground, to earth. Then you met him, and suddenly, you didn’t seem to need it anymore. You evolved, and in time, your little sliver of the sea got lost among the waves of life. You don't ask him where he found it; frankly, you don’t care. You don’t really care about anything except him.
Without a shred of doubt, you exclaim, "Yes! Yes, Felix! Of course, I’ll marry you!" You don't even let him hand you the necklace before you collide with his chest. He grunts as your full body weight slams into him, but he doesn’t mind it—not when you’re busy kissing words onto his freckles, mumbling over and over, "I love you. I love you. I love you." He is so enthralled with the moment that he almost forgets.
"There’s more," he breathes, extracting the box from between your smooshed stomachs—not really sure how it got there, but nevertheless settled atop his folded thighs, he uncurls your fist, sliding the pendant into your palm.
Your hands are cold, holding something so old. You flip the smooth stone.
Time was such a volatile thing; how easily it is broken—for with a simple flick of the wrist, you are caught outside of all existence.
Your lips part, his sucking in your shuddering gasp. Right then, right there, all that existed was the two of you, his hands trailing up your shoulders, the cold snap of gold clasping around your neck. Felix kisses you like he will never be able to again. Your fingers tug at the weight around your neck, almost in awe that you still had it on—that any of this was real.
In every lifetime.
You run your thumb over the inscriptions, golden letters scrawled on the surface of a star. He had plucked his promise straight from the sky. For now, far past his grave, your love will live on, tumbling deep beneath the waves, until his soul finds it and pledges you his heart all over again.
If you liked this please consider telling me i worked really hard on this Thank you! also little side note if I find time I might add an installment because there was supposed to be one more scene before the pregnancy but I got too overwhelmed but that scene gave more of a closing to the readers relationship with her mom sooo maybe more soon lol
reassurement
felix x chubby/bigger gn!reader
warnings: lil bit of angst with fluff. mentions of weight and a panic attack, lots of loving words at the end.
wc: 816
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"you know what, I can't do this today, lix." I said, grabbing my bag and heading towards the front door. we were getting ready for a movie night, just the two of us. I tried to ignore the buzzing in my pocket but the more it happened, the more i felt pressure in my head. why I didn't just turn off my phone? I don't know. I heard felix call out to me as I closed the door. I hate being like this, crying in front of him.
being the significant other of an idol with your relationship known to the public, most of the time is okay. then at the randomness of times, a hate train will happen. this time being about my weight. usually, I would just look past it, but almost every post was about how felix should have a significant other smaller than him. that I wasn't good enough.
"Y/N, wait please!" felix said, running and grabbing my arm as I opened my car door. I looked at him with tears in my eyes. his eyes softened like he could read me just by my eyes. which he most likely could because we have been dating for so long.
"leave me alone lix." I said, trying to get my arm out of his grip. "no, I won't let you go. you are on the edge of a panic attack, I'm not going to let you drive like that." felix said, pulling me to him and grabbing me by my waist. we sat there for a second, him rocking us side to side.
"you're okay, just breathe with me, alright?" felix said, I only nodded. I placed my head on his chest listening to his heartbeat and breathing. he held my head and massaged it to help calm me down.
"if you still wanna go for a drive, let me come with you so I know nothing will happen to you. I don't want to lose you. you're my soulmate and my best friend. I love you so much." felix said, kissing the top of my head. "I love you too and I would still like to go for a drive." I said, handing him the keys.
"okay baby." he said with a small smile. felix walked me around to the passenger seat and made sure I was good before going back to the driver seat. once the car was started, felix drove around the neighborhood with soft music playing.
I just watched the clouds out the window, trying not to think of those comments. felix reached over and placed his hand on my thigh. seeing how much bigger my thigh looked compared to his hand, I bursted into tears.
felix pulled to the side and parked the car. "hey. hey, what's going on?" he said, trying to get a better look at me, "look at me, baby." he continued, as he put one of his hands under my chin. I looked at him with tears in my eyes. I felt like it didn't know where to begin so I just word vomited everything but caring if it made any sense. about the hate, my weight to his, how it made me feel, how I'm not good enough to be with him.
"Y/N, stop! don't you ever believe what they say. I love you no matter what you look like, how much you weigh, if you decide to outside out around town or if you decide to stay home and just sit around. I fell in love with who you are as a person. you're my baby. I love you just the way you are...no pun intended." he said with a little smile, trying to lighten the mood. I huffed out a small laugh before sniffling.
"to be honest, I love how you look right now and if you decide to lose some or even gain some weight- I'm all for it. I love you. i love to make you feel loved and beautiful. I love to grip and leave kisses on the place where you don't feel the most beautiful, because those are my favorite areas on you. did you know that?" he said, "Y/N, you don't have to change for anyone. not the haters, not the fans, not strangers, not friends or family, not even for me. if you feel like change will make you happy then do it. I'm here to love and support you as your boyfriend. if this happens again, try your best to talk to me or shoot me a text. I'll be there whenever you need me, alright?"
I nodded and wiped away some of the stray tears left on my face. felix leaned over and held my face in his hands. he took a long look at me, which me made blush, before attacking with loving kisses all over my face and saying I love you after each kiss.
take care of you
lee felix x fem!reader
description: you keep going on and on about how boring sex is and that something is missing. and like any your best friend, he offers to help you find out.
warning: SMUT! bestfriends to lovers, unprotected piv sex, cunniligus, dirty talk, praising kink, minor degrading kink, breeding kink, aftercare and cuddles. if I missed anything let me know
wc: 2.6k
a/n: I finally got this done! I had to borrow a laptop. I found my old chromebook but couldn't find the charger for it so I have to order a new one and wait for it to come in😭😭 I wanna be able to finish writing my stories that are just sitting in my google docs, collecting dust. anywho I hope you all enjoy this! I had so much fun writing this! feedback is greatly appreciated!
and my requests are open btw, so send in your requests! I'd be so happy to write something for you!🥰
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“wait really? ” felix asked, putting down his water bottle on his bed. “yeah.” I said with a straight face. “not even the last guy you were with? you were so loud.” felix said in fits of giggles. “just because I was loud does not mean it was that good. he start off strong, lack in the middle of it, and was okay during the climax- but all together..it just wasn’t that good.” I said, shugging my shoulders. “i feel like i haven’t had great sex. good, sure. I feel like there’s not enough in the middle of it. it’s just kind of boring sometimes.” I said. “what do you think is missing?” he asked, laying next to me. I sighed and just looked at the ceiling as i thought. “anything. a kink. dirty talk. hell I don’t know.” I said before looking at the time on my phone. “it’s 2:23am, I need to go to bed.” I said as I sat up. “alright.” felix said in a kind of distance voice. “you okay? was talking about my sex life weird to you? i’m sorry.” I said as I got up.
“no it doesn’t, we’ve been best friends for years y/n. i’ve heard your best and worst of everything. we talk about almost everything together, we know each others’ limits when we talk about things. you’re good.” felix said with a nice smile, but I could tell his mind was wandering. i huffed out a small chuckle and said goodnight to him as I made my way to his door.
“what if I help you out?” i heard him say really fast as my hand grabbed the door handle. I turned back to him to see him sat up and looking at his hands. felix, my best friend of eight years and roommate for three. and maybe my crush of four…is willing to have sex with me. i felt my brain short-circuit. this has to be a dream.
“what? can you explain more.” I asked, standing in place. “what if i help you find out what you’re missing during sex?” he asked, messing with his sleeves. I looked at him with wide eyes. “are you being forreal?” I asked him. “i wouldn’t have asked if i wasn’t being forreal y/n.” he answered, while laying back. “well i don’t know what to say felix.” i said.
“well you don’t have to answer right away nor do you have to say yes at all. but you know i would take care of you.” felix said, locking his eyes with mine. that sentence alone: but you know i would take care of you, the way he said it, made my knees go weak. “don’t say it like that lix.” i said as i felt my insides twists in ways i never thought they would for my best friend. felix’s eyes scanned my body and saw how my body reacted to his words. he brought his eyes back up to mine but now they were much darker. full of lust clouding his chocolate brown eyes. felix slowly got out of his bed and walked over to me. “say it like what y/n?”
i didn’t know what to do, so i started backing up. felix just followed with a small smirk to his lips. i gasped as my back hit the wall. he placed one arm right above my head against the wall and the other on my waist.
“you gonna answer me?” felix said, placing his head really close to mine. “say it like it’s true.” i said in a small voice. “well it might be, you won’t know if it doesn’t happen. right baby?” he asked, tilting his head to the side a bit. my eyes darted to his lips and back to his eyes. i nodded my head. i could feel my underwear becoming more and more slick. “i need you to be verbal with me.” he said, dragging his hand that was on my waist up to my face. he kept his hand on my cheek, stroking his thumb in a comforting way. my eyes fluttered at the sweet gesture. my mind quickly coming up with the answer. “take care of me felix, please.” i said, just barely above a whisper.
felix sucked in a breath of air and smiled at me, ‘is it okay if i kiss you now?” he asked. “yes.” i answered. felix slowly brought his lips to mine and kissed me. i closed my eyes as i felt his soft lips on mine, but it quickly ended by felix pulling back. “want more?” he asked. i nodded my head, too breathless to answer. felix leaned back in and i met him halfway, making him groan into the kiss. he put more pressure into the kiss, sliding his tongue on my bottom lip. i parted my lips to let him in. felix placed both his hands on my cheeks as i gripped the sides of his shirt. felix took his time exploring the inside of my mouth, like he was trying to memorize it.
after our little makeout, felix pulled away slowly. both of our lips, red and swollen. felix placed his hands back on my waist as he kissed his way back my jaw to my neck. sucking hickeys all over, i moaned as he found my sweet spot. i ran my hands into his hair, pulling at it lightly. felix groaned as his hands made their way down, just above my shorts. he kissed my ear, “can i continue?” he asked in his deep voice. “yeah.” i said breathless. i held my breath as felix’s hand pushed its way past my shorts and underwear. he continued marking the other side of my neck as cupped my cunt.
“oh fuck baby, you’re already getting slick and wet for me.” he said, dragging his hand back and forth. he placed his fingers on my clit, drawing small circles. i head feel back against the wall, moans becoming louder and louder as he picked up the pace. “oh felix.” i moaned out. he lifted his head, looking at my face. ‘yeah baby. you like that?” he asked. “yes. need more,lix.” i whined. “what kind of more?” he asked, kissing the corners of my lips. “fingers. inside. please.” i answered, chasing his lips. “good girl.” he said, smashing his lips back on mine. he pushed carefully pushed two fingers inside of me. i gasped into the kiss.
“are you going be good for with me y/n?” felix asked. i nodded my head, “faster please.” i said, felix did exactly what i asked for. curling his fingers every time he brought them down, hitting my clit every time. i breath quickened, chest heaving as i felt the pressure building to its max. “gonna let me see how pretty you look when cum all over my fingers.” he said. “yes.” i said through a broken moan, keeping my eyes on his as i felt the knot unravel. cumming all over his hand. “oh god felix!” i said as he guided through my orgasm. he slowly removed his hand out and placed his fingers in his mouth, eyes never leaving mine.my lips parted out of surprise.
“you taste heavenly.” felix said. “fuck me felix.” i said, pulling him by his pants. “really?” he asked. “yeah, like you mean it.” i said with my own smirk.
he grabbed the hem of my shirt, making sure it was okay to take it off first before it was removed. i was ready for bed so i didn’t have a bra on. felix kissed down my body as he made his way to the ground. he pushed my sweats and underwear down along with him. face to face with my bottom half. “god, you’re beautiful, you know that?” felix said with meaning that was more than just lust. i felt my heart skip a beat. i smiled at felix as he kissed my stomach. he stood back up and grabbed my hand.
we walked over back to the bed. “lay down.” felix said. i climbed back onto the bed and got comfortable. felix removed his clothes, but left his boxers on. he climbed on the bed, over top of me. “will you let me eat you out beautiful?” he asked, placing a soft kiss on my lips. i shuddered at his words but agreed none the less. felix took his time kissing down my body once again. he took my legs, pushing them up and on his shoulders. he marked up my inner left thigh before doing the same thing on the other side.
felix blew on my clit before giving a long lick up my cunt. i arched back and rolled my hips, making him chuckle. he kissed my clit then proceeded to suck on it gently. he opened his mouth, rolling his tongue out licking up. basically making out with my lower lips. i clamped my thighs around his head, making him groan. the vibrations sending shocks up my body. “felix!” i moaned out, threading my fingers into his hair. felix brought one of his hands up to my entrance, pushing his fingers in. thrusting his fingers in and out plus the motions of his tongue on my clit made my climax come even faster than last time. “i’m gonna cum felix.” i said as my body started to shake. “cum for me.” he mumbled. felix flattened his tongue, pressing it on my clit and shaking his head side to side. my body arched one more time before my vision became white. “good girl.” he said, slowing down his fingers. felix removed his fingers and licked up my cum till i pushed his head away. felix sat up with his hands on my thighs, stroking them lightly.
“still need more sweet girl?” he asked. i nodded my head, trying to reach for his underwear. felix quickly grabbed my hands and put them above my head. i looked at him with wide eyes. “ah ah ah. didn’t you say you wanted me to fuck you?” he asked. “yes i did.” i answered. “then roll over. hands and knees.” he said, letting go and sitting back up. i quickly turned over. as i steaded myself, i heard felix removing the last of his clothing.
i felt felix grabbed my hips and pull them back. he guided one of his hands down my back and pressed down. i put my arms under my head and pushed my ass out, learning it a playful smack. i giggled a bit as felix pressed his body to mine. “ready for me to take of care you? fuck you how you need it?” felix asked, lining up his dick with my opening. a moan slipped pasted my lips. “yes please lixxie. fuck me, i need you so bad.” i whined out. felix pushed into me with a groan. “so fucking tight even after stretching you out.” he said as he bottomed out. i clenched around him, bucking my hips back. he drew his hips back and thrusted back in once and hard. my eyes rolled back at the feeling. “be patient.” he growled out, gripping my hips tightly. i huffed out and felix heard…and did not like that. he started snapping his hips at a decent hard pace. bringing a moan every time..
“i was trying to be nice, but all you wanted was to be full and fucked, right baby?” he said, not really asking. “just so fucking needy, didn’t even care who it was huh? not even if it was your best friend.” he continued. i whined into the pillow as i gripped the sheets. the sound my wet skin echoed throughout the room. good thing we didn’t have neighbors. “i bet you just want to be stuffed full of my cum.” he said, making me clench around him hard. “oh am i right?” he asked, laying his body on mine. grabbing my boobs with both his hands, pinching my nipples a bit. without pulling out or stopping, he lifted my body where my back was against his chest.
“answer y/n.” felix said, grinding his cock right on my g-spot. i cried out from the pleasure building up. “answer or i’m stopping right here.” he threatened. “yes! i want to be stuff full of your cum. so deep inside me.” i said with tears in my eyes. “yeah, so deep that i put a baby in you?” he asked as i cried out again. “you gonna be a good girl and take my cum like the little cumslut you are?” he asked as his thrusts started to become sloppy. “yes!” i said. i could barely hold my head in place as my body started to feel like jello. i turned my head to see him. “can i cum?” i asked as tears fell into my cheeks. “fuck. yeah go ahead a cum baby. cum with me.” he said, bringing one hand up to my face and holding my head in place so i didn’t look away.
one final snap of his hips and my body spasmed from how hard my orgasm hit me. felix followed and stilled his hips, cumming deep inside. “shit.” he moaned out. he gave a few more shallow thrusts before completely stopping. felix buried his head into the crease of my neck and shoulder. i took a deep breath and brought my hand up to felix’s hair, combing it out of his face. he lifted his head up, kissing my shoulder. “you did so well y/n.” he said, still out of breath. i chuckled and smiled. “you did to lixxie.” i said. “let’s go get ourselves clean up, yeah?” he asked, i nodded.
felix helped me up off his softening dick and bed. after helping me to the bathroom, felix went to go pick up our clothes. after i did my business and got cleaned up, i heard a knock at the door. “yeah.” i said as i was washing my hands. felix popped his head in and handed me my clothes. “thank you.” i said grabbing them. i put my underwear on first then my hoodie, deciding not to put my sweats back on. “so we made kind of a mess on my bedsheets, is it alright if we go sleep in your room?” felix asked as blush forming across his cheeks. i laughed out and turned to him. “yeah felix. lets go.” i said as we left the sex-scented room.
we both climbed into bed and under the blanket. “i forget how much softer your bed is compared to mine.” felix said, snuggling in. “now i know you’re just saying that because your sleeping next to me because we have to exact same mattress.” i said, cuddling up to him. felix wrapped his arm around me and pulled me even closer. “yeah you’re right.” he said with a big smile. “can you turn off your side lamp now lixxie.” i said. “why? i won’t be able to see your cute face.” he said. “well this cute face needs her beauty sleep, so please turn off the light.” i said. “alright.” he said, quickly turning off the light and turning back to me.
“so did you figure out what you were missing?” felix asked. i closed my eyes and nuzzled my head into his chest. i nodded my head, slowly falling asleep. “what was it?” he asked quietly, most likely sleep taking over his body as well. “you.” i whispered before fallen into a peaceful sleep. “good. i hoped that it was.” he said, kissing the top of my head. “took us long enough.” he said before fallen asleep.
݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .☽ fae trap ☾. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖
{ Pairing } - Elf!Felix x Witch.afab!Reader
{ Genre } - Smut, Dark, Fantasy
{ Synopsis } - It is said, that if you ever find yourself inside of a fairy ring. The fae will punish you, by making you dance until you are passing out from exhaustion. But when you find yourself doing a different kind of 'dance' on the ground, in the middle of one, with the most beautiful creature you've ever seen you might add, you wonder; is this truly a punishment?
{ WC } - 7.7k
{ Warnings & Tags } - 18+ MDNI, DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT, dubcon, aphrodisiac effects, oral (f&m receiving), unprotected sex (piv; do as I say, not as I write & pee after sex!), rough/hard sex, overstimulation, big dick felix, dacryphilia, talk of breeding & mating, talking of mating rituals, please don't touch fly agaric mushrooms, srsly they're toxic and deadly, possible incorrect french usage.
{ Disclaimer } - This work is in no way associated or depicting the actual life of the members of SKZ. It is a fictional piece of work, and I do not own Stray Kids. All works of fiction are loosely inspired by SKZ, and in no way am I saying it is true to their character.
{ A/N } - For the love of all things skz. DO NOT EVER TOUCH FLY AGARIC/AMANITA MUSCARIA MUSHROOMS. THEY ARE TOXIC. DEADLY. This is also probably the darkest thing I've written on this account so far. But it doesn't feel inherently evil to me personally??? But it is enough to warrant a TW! This started off as a birthday oneshot for Felix. I'm starting to think I'm no good at oneshots. This could be left alone, but it could also be a series... I have so many world building thoughts, but idk if I wanna do that. What do you think?
Dusk was approaching as you made your way home from your walk.
You were blessed to own a cute little home, right on the edge of a beautiful and mysterious forest. Every day you were able to take nature walks, wandering through the treeline, exploring the vegetation. Collecting materials, making sure never to take too much of what the woodland had to offer. And caring for as much as you could, though you knew you were not essential to the survival of wilderness itself.
That didn't stop you from befriending the little critters who made their home there, or from essentially finding your own second home there.
You never brought anything with you to permanently invade nature. Instead you wrapped your daily essentials in a little bindle. It usually contained a hearty snack, a book or two, endless vials and jars, your cell, and a small emergency kit. Homemade salves, balms, and tonics included.
You always had some new shiny objects for your crow friends, making sure to exchange the gifts they left for you at your designated spot. And you always made sure to leave some nuts and seeds for the various rodents who liked to stuff their cheeks. Again, you didn't need to, but they really liked sweet black walnuts and salty peanuts in the shells. Who were you to deny them that treat!
Some days you brought select crystals with you, cleaning and recharging them in the streams of spring water. Other days you'd use that same water, sealing it in jars and leaving it nearby to make moon water overnight. Those were about the only two things you ever left in the forest, always making sure to come back the next day and retrieve them.
You always carry a little basket with you too. The forest was abundant in ingredients for many different things. Your favorite is mushrooms and fungi.
There were many times you'd find a log of an oak tree, fallen over and resting on the ground. A bunch of chicken of the woods growing on it. You'd collect them, taking them home to cook for dinner or other meals.
Other days you'd find lion's mane, and make sure to gather some for your favorite tincture to make and take. It did wonders for your anxiety.
You were a green witch through and through, and you were raised this way. You drew your energy and essence from nature, always taking little bits of it home.
Today was no different. Forgoing mushrooms, you instead had bundles of mugwort and a jar full of mulberries in your wicker basket. Wrapped in a little cloth were a bunch of spicebush berries.
You were nearing the last clearing within the woods, your house was about a ten minute walk away at this point.
The soft moss against your bare feet was grounding, and you were listening to the buzz and crackle of nightlife within the forest. Your white skirt ended at your knees, flaring out. The chiffon is blowing in the cool breeze. It was still tshirt weather, and that's exactly what you wore on top. A fitted one, pale and muted ivy green. You gave up on bras long ago, you were a solitary creature anyways. The friends who did visit never cared about your attire.
You were in your own world, playing a balancing game on a stump and humming to yourself, when flashes of red caught your eye.
In the clearing, scattered in a broken circle, was fly agaric.
Your heart fluttered at this rare find. You walk past this clearing daily, and never noticed any of the red mushrooms with white speckles there before.
Eagerly, you approach. In the back of your mind, warning bells are going off. Thinking back to childhood, of the stories your mom once told you of the fae folk. You'd encountered fairy rings before, but never of this type of mushroom, and never broken ones. Certainly never one so big. You never breached the little white rings in the past, not wanting to mess with entities so possibly mischievous.
But it would be fine right? This might not even be considered a fairy ring. It was sort of... circle-ish? But not really. There were so many gaps in between them, it wasn't a perfect circle like you'd seen in the past. And these mushrooms were so rare and so powerful, in so many ways. You could feel their energy radiating around you.
You glanced around, searching for any signs of immortal creatures lurking near. You saw and heard nothing, but that would be typical. They never willingly reveal themselves, in fact... You've never seen one. You've never seen any kind of fae folk. It's not that you didn't believe in them, you were sure some form of them existed. Afterall, you practice a form of magick. Your own form, and that exists.
You were convinced all mythical creatures either exist or had existed, the idea of them couldn't come from nothing. Not when they were in so many stories across all different cultures.
You paused for a few more moments, really trying to feel any negative energy. There was none, there was never any in your little forest.
So, tentatively, you took a few steps forward. Then you paused again, waiting for something to pop out.
Nothing.
You giggled to yourself happily, and then bent down to pluck the mushrooms from the marshy earth.
They all varied in size, some were large with bulbous caps. Some were shorter, and had flatter caps. Each mushroom, you made sure to pick with a cloth barrier between them and your fingers. These could be deadly if used the wrong way or taken in excess. You had no idea what would happen if you came into direct contact with it, on your bare skin.
You really should start carrying gloves with you.
You made your way around the broken circle, humming in between giggles, and unconsciously dancing. You were nearly prancing each bare step to the next.
If you had paid more attention to your mothers tales, you'd realize the consequences of stepping inside a fairy ring were already taking effect.
You were collecting more than you needed now, your basket was overflowing. But still, you didn't want to stop. You felt strangely overcome with merriment. You never felt more at home in these woods than this moment.
You mindlessly set your basket down, your humming growing in volume. You looked to the sky, as you allowed your body to sway back and forth. Arms stretched out towards the waning moon, coming to life in the dark sky surrounding you.
Your eyes closed, soaking in the moonlight. And you brought your arms back down, letting them float at your sides as you twirled, and twirled. Your skirt flutters up to reveal your thighs even more, hair whipping in your face. You revelled in the feeling of the squishy dirt beneath your feet. You felt grounded, but as if you were flying all at the same time.
You don't know when your solitude was breached, or if you were ever truly alone in the first place, but you finally noticed his presence when his hands intertwined with yours.
He was twirling with you, spinning you in circles.
He was nearly glowing, strawberry colored lips revealing the sweetest smile you'd ever seen. His long, straight white hair framed his face stunningly, tendrils of it outlining his strong jaw line. And his face... so, perfect. He had hundreds of freckles splashed across his cheeks, nose and eyes. Even some scattering up to his hairline, and down to his chin. You'd imagine you could create many constellations with them, like the stars that twinkle in the night sky. He adorned various jewelry, all silver. In his ears, and a cuff across the bridge of his nose. He even wore a gorgeous crown that laid across his forehead as a head piece. It was thin, and wiry, made up of gorgeous silver filigree that shone in the moonlight. You knew that the rings you felt in between your fingers would be silver too.
He wore all white. You couldn't be sure exactly what his outfit was, but his shirt was a flowing lace up top. Revealing delicate collar bones and toned chest. It was mostly a blur in the midst of his movements.
Your gasp was delayed, only coming out when he pulled you closer to him. Your hand remains in his, while his arm is wrapped around your waist. You were nearly flush with him, feeling the rest of his chiseled torso against your plush body. But he kept your face at some distance to maintain eye contact. The smile never slipped from his lips.
He has you captivated, and the two of you don't falter in your melodic movements once. His eyes bore into you, dark and sharp. Yet he exuded a certain softness, and you found yourself lost in the moment. It didn't seem real.
But it was.
You were seeing him. In all his glory, ever mysterious and breathtaking. The most handsome man you've ever laid eyes on.
You were hearing him. He was humming the same tune you were, an old lullaby your mom used to sing to you. His voice was deep, and even, harmonizing with your breathy high pitched voice beautifully.
You were feeling him. He was touching you, his hand interlocked with yours. His grip around your waist is gentle but possessive. He held you like he didn't want to break you, but knew if he was too loose, you'd go running.
Though you weren't so sure you would run.
Your mind was racing. There's no way you could stumble across a perfect stranger, who was immediately dancing with you, so close to the edge of the forest. So close to your house. Maybe this was some sort of hallucination. A side effect of being surrounded by so many toxic mushrooms.
The mushrooms.
That was it, it all clicked. Too late did the rest of your mother's words ring in your ears.
His aura, his energy, his perfect pixie-like features. You noticed the point of his ears now, the glittery sheen to his skin. His smile is full of white pointed teeth, dull now, but you could tell they were once sharper in the past. His slight cat-like eyes, giving them that sharp look even though everything else about him screamed delicate.
Your humming stopped, but his didn't. Your mother's voice is filling your head, and you were repeating the words she once told you so long ago.
'and if you're caught, the fae folk will punish you. You'll be dancing within the ring until you faint from exhaustion.' you whispered quietly.
His smile only grew, a glint lighting up his eyes.
He finally spoke, his chest vibrating against yours, "Wise words, from a magnificent young lady."
He had an accent, you couldn't quite place it. Something between old english and australian. It made you want to melt.
He started laughing, and you were sure that if he didn't have a grip on you, you would've slid to the ground.
You've both stopped twirling, but he's still moving you, moving with you. Swaying back and forth.
"Who are you?" You ask curiously.
"Who?" He chuckles, "Usually it's 'what are you', that people ask me. Though it's been almost a century since I have revealed myself to a mortal."
A century? Your mouth dries, and you feel something akin to fear course through your veins. But you aren't scared of him for some reason. Wary, suspicious, but not scared.
"You're different though, you seem to have at least a diminutive amount of knowledge of my realm."
You want to get angry at that comment. You'd like to consider yourself well informed and educated on all supernatural and magickal subjects. There'd always be more to learn though, and the human brain simply could not grasp it in its entirety. So he wasn't wrong.
You're still saying nothing, dazed from his presence. So he continues.
"You were right when you said fae folk." He assures.
"You're a fairy?" You whisper, wonder dazzling in your voice.
At that he laughs again, and you swear you hear small chimes behind it.
"An elf. I believe that is the universal name humans gave us. Not all fae are fairies, there are others too."
As he speaks, he lets go of your hand, bringing his fingers up to brush strands of hair from your face. His touch is warm, for some reason that shocks you.
"Elf." You repeat, not a question, but a statement.
He hums, in agreement and starts to twirl you around again. His hand resting on your cheek, thumb brushing featherlight touches against it.
You're trying very hard to wrap your head around the entire scenario. You shouldn't be surprised. You've dealt with other worldly things in the past. Spiritual realms are completely different from anything having to do with the fae world though.
Worry floods through you again once you realize what's happening.
"Am I being punished?" You lip quivers as you speak, "I-I was just trying to collec-"
He's bringing his head down, his forehead meeting yours. You feel the cold bite of the silver headpiece touching your skin. It's enough to shut you up.
"Shhh, darling. Don't view it as a punishment."
"I don't want to dance until I pass out." You slowly say, even though your body feels otherwise.
Underneath the initial shock and caution, you still felt that overwhelming happiness. It was borderline euphoric... and strangely arousing.
Everything happening inside your mind and body right now was so confusing. You were feeling lost, and found yourself clinging to the man--the elf, before you.
"You pretty creature, don't worry. Danser dans le ronds de sorcières... that's for children."
French? This being was a riddle.
"I don't understand." You force out.
He leans back a bit, so he can look into your eyes and your thighs clench, "We tell the kids, fae and human, that if a mortal is caught within our rings. They dance to exhaustion. The humans carried this myth with them into adulthood, while our kind later learned the truth of these special rings."
He's still dancing with you, moving your body elegantly to a now imaginary song. Leading you in something reminiscent of a waltz, but you can barely focus on that when his touches are electric against your skin.
"The truth?" You ask.
He's dipping you down now, bending with your body as he once again is peering into your eyes. At first you think it's part of the dance. Until your back meets the land that was underneath your feet. The mixture of smells was potent. The scent of damp moss, and semi-sweet foliage filling your nose.
He hums again, "It was never an entire lie, it always started off with dancing."
The timbre of his voice was pooling wetness in your panties. You felt beads of sweat forming on your brow, and you were bewildered at how your body was reacting right now. It didn't make sense.
His body is hovering over you now, his face coming close to yours. His nose is brushing along yours before he speaks again.
"What better way to set the mood than a passionate dance, and in this case, under the moonlight?"
You whimpered, feeling disoriented and needing his touch.
"I don't even know your name.", was the only thing you managed to mumble.
He chuckled, and you felt his breath puff against your lips, "It's unimportant darling, but since you're so... alluring. You can call me Felix... I'd love to hear it rolling off your tongue when I make you cum."
You were mewling at the thought of fucking this mystical being, when you felt his lips against yours.
He was almost lazy in the way he kissed you. Seemingly in no rush at all. And it's not that you were complaining, but you wanted more. So you wrapped your arms around his neck, forcing his body flush with yours.
He was smiling against your lips now, and you took the opportunity to swipe your tongue across his bottom lip, begging for access.
"So eager. Patience little dove. You'll get what you desire and more."
You knew it was absurd to lust after a man--an elf, gods how could you keep forgetting that, that you just met. But your body was burning and it felt like he was your only rescue.
His hands wandered your body, groping and massaging every inch.
He had your leg wrapped around him, his hand trailing down the back of your thigh and his lips attached to your neck. He was marking you with what you imagined to be the most beautiful bruises. You were panting at this point, and it felt ridiculous to be this turned on by so little. By a stranger. But it didn't make you want to stop.
His fingers reached the edge of your panties, and you gasped. You felt his smile again, he was enjoying every bit of this. You felt powerless to his strokes against you. Your hips were bucking up, chasing for friction.
His hand gripped your hip tightly, fingers squeezing into your flesh, pinning you further into the dirt.
You hissed before whining, begging "Please."
"I said be patient." His voice was stern as he spoke against your ear.
It still didn't stop you from squirming beneath him, your mind wasn't registering anything beyond wanting to feel him filling you up.
He brought his face back to yours, eyes gleaming and the most naughty expression written across it.
"Fine. As you wish, little dove. But don't forget, I was trying to ease you into this."
He tore your panties off of you, and his fingers were rubbing against you harshly, sending jolts of pleasure through you.
"A-aaah!" You were moaning loudly, his movements jarring.
"This is what you wanted darling, isn't it?" He's muttering against your lips now, slipping his fingers into you.
Your body feels more alive than ever, waves of pleasure washing over you. His fingers skillfully curl inside you, while his thumb works your sensitive bud. Swipe after swipe, eliciting more and more of your arousal onto his hand.
His kiss is searing, and feels like the only thing currently keeping you anchored to your body. You felt your orgasm building quickly, the band growing tighter and tighter in your stomach. It felt like you'd float away when it snapped.
You can't contain the lewd noises you're making. Between the moans he's swallowing from your lips, and the loud squelching from between your thighs, it was deafening. Or maybe it was just that your ears were ringing.
It felt like only seconds later when he brought you over the edge, his movements slowing but never stopping. You're whining, and your legs are trembling but you don't want him to stop. You're nearing over sensitivity and when you close your eyes, you see nothing but stars.
All you can think of are the freckled constellations on his cheek.
You feel drunk on this moment, and you don't want it to end. It's as if he knows exactly where your mind is when he speaks again.
"You're not done little dove, don't you worry your pretty little head."
When you open your eyes, and tilt your head up, his shirt and pants are discarded. Revealing a dizzying body. He was lithe yet chiseled. His body is almost dainty, but each muscle is carved in the most irresistible way. His abs were glorious, your eyes trail lower, following the v cut. You notice the faint spattering of a happy trail, and your eyes follow it.
And fuck.
You've never been one to view someones cock as pretty but... his was. The tip was so swollen and pink, and leaking generous amounts of precum. Faint blue veins prominent along the shaft, and he stood tall and proud. His girth made you wonder if you could handle the stretch. It had been a while since you'd last been intimate.
He brought his hand, covered in your slick, to his member. Spreading it all over in a mixture with his precum, making it glisten. Your mouth started to water, and your legs spread wider for him. You pulled your skirt completely up, presenting yourself to him.
His jaw was slack, mouth hung open as he watched you, fist pumping himself slowly.
"Such a good girl for me darling, aren't you?" He said with that charming smile.
There was something about the way he looked at you, while doing such a perverse act that had your juices dripping down you.
Then he was on top of you again, cock sliding into you. Your entire body tensed at the intrusion and you wailed, a mix of pain and pleasure. But it was so satisfying, you couldn't get enough. Your arms wrapped around his neck again, and he was thrusting into you at a brutal pace.
Your back was digging into the ground, and you started to feel bits of grass and dirt against your skin. You pulled against him, trying to adjust yourself so you could lose yourself in the dance you two were now performing.
He pulled out of you, and sat back on his knees, that's when you noticed his clothes underneath him. You had no idea he was wearing a cape earlier. It was sprawled out, creating a barrier between him and the ground.
He picked you up, and positioned you to straddle his lap, facing him. Then he slid back into you, your eyes rolled back, and you let out a filthy moan.
This position felt more intimate but still desperate, he was reaching deeper into you. The head of his cock pistoning against your g-spot. It felt so good you could cry.
You were crying, you realized.
"Shhh, little dove, you're taking it so well. It feels so good, doesn't it?"
"Yes!" You sob.
He's wiping the tears from your eyes with his fingers, and smiling at you like you're the most precious thing on this planet.
"That's right, pretty. So pretty when you cry." He groans out, and his pace grows faster, rougher.
His hand dips down between you, and he's toying with your clit now. In any other circumstance, you'd be embarrassed by the way your body uncontrollably trembles. Your muscles are spasming at his touch. You just couldn't bring yourself to care, he was making you feel too good.
"Darling," He purred, as he slowed his thrusts and pinched your clit between two fingers, rolling it, "I want you to look me in the eyes when you cum for me, can you do that?"
You were mewling as you nodded your head frantically, feeling your peak rush towards you.
At that he started fucking into you harshly, almost painfully, and you were coming undone with a loud cry on top of him. Your body tensed, nails digging into his shoulders, struggling not to throw your head back. His hand that was playing with you, gripped your jaw, smearing your own arousal on your face.
He was making sure you kept your word, maintaining your gaze on his while you clenched around him. Your eyes were fluttering as you tried to keep them open. He was biting his lip, eyebrows scrunched together as he fucked you through your orgasm. Watching your face contorted in pleasure.
"So tight." He grunted.
You were scratching at him now, nails dragging down his shoulders. And your mouth was hung open in a silent scream, your voice having given up on you.
It was becoming overwhelming.
You still didn't want it to stop.
"I know you can take it darling, take it." He growled, gripping both your hips now to steady you.
So you did, until you were limp in his arms, and he was releasing into you with a groan.
Your head was resting on his shoulder. Sweaty skin sticking to each other, and he was soothing you. Humming and stroking your hair gently. You were breathing heavily, trying to come down from this mind blowing experience. But you weren't descending, not mentally. You were still riding that high, stuck in a lust filled haze.
He started to roll his hips tantalizingly slow, and you hissed at it, feeling slight pain. Mostly you were shocked he was still hard.
His chest vibrated while he quietly laughed, "Did you forget the 'more' part, darling. I keep telling you, we're not done yet."
You whined at the sensation of his gentle movements.
"Shhh, there there." He's teasing you, "Are we a little sore?"
"Yes." You breathed.
"I can fix that."
You gasped when he slid out of you, hating the fact that you felt so empty.
He was positioning you to lay down on his clothes, taking care that no part of you touched the ground. You just let him handle you, molding your pliant body however he wanted it.
His hands were rubbing down your arms, and he was smiling down at you. When you met his eyes, you couldn't explain the exact emotions you were feeling. You'd let this man take your soul if he asked right now.
He was licking his lips as his hand trailed back to your core. You gasped again, then whined when he dragged his fingers through your swollen folds. His touch was almost massaging, yet sensual. He was touching everywhere, teasingly avoiding your sensitive bud.
The more he touched you, the more you writhed. And sensing another comment about how you can't be still or patient, you yanked him down to you so you could kiss him.
You were tired of just laying there, you wanted to start giving. To start touching.
You didn't know where all this stamina came from, but you were determined to use it. You jerked your hips up, leaning more into his touch.
It wasn't until you reached down to wrap your fingers around his length that he paused his movements.
He was still slick with your cum. And you used that to give him slow strokes.
He let out a hoarse moan against your lips, before pressing his fingers directly on your clit, rubbing in small circles. He was matching your tempo directly. You whined into the kiss, your hand picking up pace. Pumping him faster now, and he followed your lead.
Or so you thought, just as you felt your climax starting to build, his fingers were being pulled away.
He took your hand off him, and then crawled down your body, coming face to face with your core.
"So pretty, even here darling."
You were blushing at his words, but you couldn't take your eyes off of his, as he stared at you from between your thighs.
"Still sore? Let me make it feel better, little dove."
And you felt his tongue lave through your folds. It was gentle and it felt hot, and it drove you crazy. The flicks of his tongue against your clit were maddening, and you wanted more.
Your hips started slowly moving against his face, and this time he let you. He lets you roll your hips, and grind against his face. His tongue flattened against you, and you slid your hand into his blindingly white locks. You started grinding against him harshly, losing all sense and control of your body and just focusing on climaxing.
He let himself be used by you, and as your grip in his hair tightened, so did that feeling in your stomach. You felt another orgasm come over you, and he let you ride it out, quite literally.
You expected to start feeling spent by now, but you didn't. So before he could climb back up your body to kiss you, you were sitting up and pushing him onto his back.
He landed on it with a thud, puffing out air and looking at you incredulously.
You let the primal urges take over as you lowered yourself onto your stomach, and took his member in your hand. You licked up the underside of his cock, your eyes never leaving his. He groaned as you watched his eyes roll into the back of his head.
You placed a soft kiss on the tip, and licked the strings of precum off your lips.
"Fuck..." He whispered.
"Let me return the favor." You mumbled before you took his tip between your lips.
You let your tongue swirl over it a few times, savoring his taste. He brought his hand down to your face, and pushed your hair back for you.
You let your tongue run down the underside of his cock, and you sunk your mouth onto him. You had completely engulfed him, and were struggling not to gag. Still, you never intended to stop.
He was grunting as your head bobbed up and down on him, saliva collecting at the corners of your mouth and dripping down to pool at his pelvis.
"Making--ah fuck--such a mess for me, darling." He groaned.
He lets you keep at your own pace for a while longer before he starts thrusting into you. He kept your head in place, and you gagged and tears started running down your cheeks. Each stroke became more and more erratic, until ropes of his hot cum were shooting down your throat.
He pulled you off of him and you gulped down breaths of air. He was caressing your cheek, swiping a mix of tears, spit and cum from your lips before kissing you.
That's how you both continued throughout the night. Pleasuring each other, nearly non-stop, under the moonlight. Your mind was fractured, nothing else but him existed inside of it. He'd touched, fondled, massaged, and embraced you, until you could only respond with breathy whispers of his name.
"Felix..." You sighed, when he was bringing feeling back to your numb legs by massaging them.
"Felix..." You moaned, as he slowly took you as you both laid on your sides.
"Felix..." You screamed as you came undone on top of him, riding him roughly.
He took you in many different positions, and you indulge yourself in each one. When he wasn't fucking you, you were whining in complaint and going down on him. If he wasn't going down on you, he was edging you with his fingers. Your hands never left each other's bodies, always needing connection. You were sure he was just as familiar with your body as you were by this point.
The exhaustion finally hit when he had you on your back in a mating press. The last thing you remember, is staring up into the twilight sky. Dawn was approaching, the stars were disappearing before your eyes, as the golden glow of the sun started to peek through.
Your eyes were fluttering as you fought unconsciousness, determined to finish fucking this completely ethereal creature. Felix was barely putting in an effort to fuck you, but he still slid in and out of you at an agonizingly slow pace, as if he wanted to keep your orgasm at bay. You both wanted to extend this moment in time, but your body wouldn't have that.
When you finally let go, cumming on his cock for what felt like the hundredth time. That's when your eyes shut and you gave into the exhaustion.
The familiar scent of nag champa incense filled your nostrils as you started to come to.
Your bedroom, permanently infused with your favorite scent to burn, that's where you were. The familiar feel of your sheets beneath you, and your heavy comforter confirmed that.
Your mind still felt a little cloudy as you started to recall how you got to your bed from the forest.
That's when you feel a body next to you and your eyes shot open.
"Felix?" You croaked, your voice dry and hoarse.
He was laying next to you on his side, in your bed, in your house.
He had the blankets pulled up to his waist, and was resting his head on his hand. Elbow propped up, so he could see you better. He was shirtless and he wore that same smile on his face, like he was so fond of you.
"Is that still the only thing you can say, little dove?" He whispered teasingly.
"How- I mean, why-?" You stutter as you attempt to sit up in bed, but your entire body aches.
You hiss at the burning sensation you felt between your legs. And your legs, gods, you don't think that they've ever felt so sore.
"Easy darling, you need to rest." He said as he helped you sit up.
He reached over to his side of the bed and handed you a glass of water, motioning for you to drink.
You eyed him curiously as you sipped your water, finishing it rather quickly when you realized how thirsty you were.
"I ran you a bath and kept it hot, when you're ready we should wash you up more."
"More?" You questioned him.
"I did clean you up last night, I'm not a monster. The bath will help ease your muscles." He chuckled.
"How did you even know where I live?"
"It's not hard to figure out, we weren't that far from it. Your house is the only one for miles."
You still felt guarded around him, even after the night you shared. If the stories your mother told you turned out to be partially true, you could only imagine what other lore could turn out to be true.
Now this mischievous creature knew where you lived, he was in your home.
"I know this is your sacred space little dove, I don't intend to intrude. However, I couldn't exactly leave you in the state you were in. How are you feeling? Is your head a little clearer?" He spoke softly as he brushed his fingers through your hair.
It is. Almost all of that dazed feeling was gone, you felt more lucid. In that clarity though, a rush of embarrassment hit you. You felt your skin heat up at the more clear memories of last night.
You were never the type for hookups or one night stands, yet the things you did with this perfect stranger... This perfect magickal stranger... they felt unspeakable. You'd never lost yourself so completely in someone else's presence, much less with your own... sessions.
You hide your face in your hands and rub at your temples, trying to make sense of this entire situation. Of your own feelings. You didn't exactly regret it or hate it. Something still felt off. Not only was the entire act abnormal in general, and downright questionable. But it was so out of character for you. Did he use... compulsions? Did he have that type of magick?
"Thinking too hard will just exhaust you more." He said.
"Look..." You sigh, as you turn to face him, "I'm a little lost here, I don't know what to make of this all."
Next thing you know, he's off the bed. He's picking you up in his arms, and you notice you're both still nude. Your face flushes again at that, and you struggle a bit in his arms.
"Be calm darling, I'm just taking you to the tub. We can talk about it all."
You let him place you in the tub, and then he's sliding in behind you. Slotting you between his legs. He's pulling you back towards him, so you lay against his chest. You both sit like that for a few moments, absorbing the heat from the bath and getting used to each other in a new type of intimate way.
You should be kicking him out of your house. You should be cussing him out. Defending yourself, but why didn't you feel the need to defend yourself against him? Why were you drawn to him?
When you think about the facts, some would say you were attacked last night. I mean there's a reason the Fae call it a punishment You didn't feel attacked though. You enjoyed yourself, as crazy as that is to say.
You always knew you were an adventurous soul, but you never thought to this extent.
How do you come to terms with actually feeling okay with this whole thing, when you knew you shouldn't be?
"You're a witch, right?" He suddenly asks you, breaking your train of thought.
"I am... though I'm beginning to question the validity of that title, seeing as I have an actual magical creature behind me." You mumble.
You knew the magick you practiced was real. You could feel it. It's not like you could create fire though, or move things, or transfigure things in front of you. You weren't even sure Felix could do any of that as an elf. You weren't sure of anything anymore.
You felt like you were entering an existential crisis. Panic was starting to settle within you when you felt his chest vibrate with laughter, it was an oddly soothing sensation that you know you've felt before.
"No, you are. I can sense it, it's in your blood. It took me a while to piece it together, but you are a witch through and through. Sometimes humans don't know of their tie to the magickal world, but I figured... from your altar, among other objects and ingredients I've noticed here, that you knew."
You hummed, your mother always told you that you were a part of a long line of witches. She raised you heavily within her practice. You never doubted her, but somehow this new revelation made it so much more real. You realize this was opening a whole new aspect in your own practice. A hidden world, seemingly waiting for your return.
"Is that why you came to me? Because you sensed a witch was near?" You questioned him, your hands playing with the water.
"No, you stepped inside my fairy ring. I have to say I was shocked. I placed it in, what I thought was, an inconspicuous area. I hadn't realized your home was nearby."
"Okay, I'm going to need you to explain." You sighed.
"Well... you already know what I told you yesterday. The stories you were told, were passed down by your ancestors and other mortals in general. You don't really just dance in fairy rings, that's a small fib we tell the children. As more human children found the rings, when we'd find them dancing. We'd send them off, warning them if they came in again that we would have them dancing until they faint. When our own children wandered into them curiously, we'd tell them the same thing until it became time for them to learn. It's just something stupid the ancestors came up with, I don't know... It does always start out with a courting dance though, but the main reason for them is, inside a fairy ring... you mate. They're essentially a part of an ancient mating ritual."
At that you nearly jumped up to smack him, but he was a step ahead of you. His arms tightened around your body, pinning your arms to your chest.
"MATING?!" You screamed at him, trying to turn your head and make eye contact, "I don't fucking wan-"
"Please, calm down little dove. It's not possible for me to actually breed you. That requires an entirely different ritual, one that hasn't been performed in centuries. I'm not even sure anyone would know how to perform it these days..." He trails off.
"So then why even lay these stupid Fae traps for humans anyways?!" You screech.
"They're not traps, and they're not meant for humans." He says defensively, and you can hear the pouting in his tone, "Think of it like this. You know how some penguins build big and pretty nests to attract a mate? It's kind of like that. It's a lot to explain in detail, and I had to create one. Now that I'm of age, it's expected of me to find a partner. Even if I don't find the need to."
"And why do they exist in this realm if they're not meant for us?"
"Well, a long time ago, back when there was only this realm, and there were more Fae than humans, they came across one. That fairy was so angry at the human for intruding on something so intimate of his, and he threatened the human with a punishment. Before any of the other Fae could stop him, he entered the ring. When they both were inside of it, they were overcome with the magic of the ring. The courting dance had started, and no one else was able to enter. The desire for each other grew. In his anger he must've forgotten what the ring's intention was, and was only focused on punishing the human. But he never got that far. They ended up... mating. They never separated from that night, spending their lives together. It was millenia ago. It created an uproar though. Our kinds had never joined before that way."
You sat and listened, calming down a bit as he told you this story.
"There were battles, not an outright war but there might as well have been. They grew to love each other, and they led the winnings of those battles to stay together. They opened the door for Fae and humans to be together, but it has always been frowned upon from both sides."
There was an entire history of this world that you had never known. One that you could never even imagine to be true. But it is. Before your mind let you delve into it though, you thought back to something he said.
"Overcome with magic? These rings hold compulsions over beings?" You questioned hastily, needing to confirm your suspicions.
"No. It's not like that..." He sighed, "Didn't you feel different last night?" He continues, "The mushrooms release something like a pheromone. An aphrodisiac, to enhance your sexual stamina. Among other mood boosting and energy boosting properties. It starts by uplifting your mood, making you feel the happiest you've ever been. Then you start dancing, your energy building up in preparation for what's to come. It's not until your partner enters that the aphrodisiacs start releasing. But it doesn't just take away your consent like that. Both parties have to be willing... it needs to be mutual. Though that's not to say that's not how every instance turns out. Evil exists in all realms."
You shivered at his words, trying to process everything. You could clearly remember the primal urges taking over, the need to constantly be filled. It explained that off feeling, why you were acting so out of character. But you couldn't deny that you had wanted it.
Craved it.
You never tried to stop it, never wanted to stop it... In fact you initiated it to an extent.
He started talking again, "That's why I couldn't just leave you there. Especially not in that forest, where other creatures lurk and might find you. I never felt anything dark there, but that doesn't mean it won't come along. I brought you home. I cleaned you up, I made you drink because you were getting dehydrated. I cared for you."
He was loosening his grip around you to rub your shoulders. It made you think back to the skilled massages he gave you last night, in between all of the sex. He made sure to take care of you the whole night it seemed.
"But none of this answers my question from earlier, why not place the rings in your own realm now? Why would any of the Fae place them here?" You asked.
"There are many different reasons..." He mumbled, "Some of them do it because they want to experience sex with a willing human. Some of them do use them as traps for humans, and those Fae are disgraceful, downright evil. Most of those types have been banished from the realm I come from. But some are like me. We try to hide them, from everyone. Because even though we're required to have them, we don't want to use them."
Then you thought back to his previous words, "Wait... 'find your partner' you said? Are we- do we have some sort of bond now?"
The silence was thick in the air. You waited for him to speak, but he didn't, so you turned around in the tub to face him. Your legs spread out on top of his, as you half straddled his lap.
His eyes stared into yours, expressionless. It was much colder than his usual warm aura, so you grabbed his hand to hold it, and asked again in a softer tone, "Do we?"
"We don't have to. It's not permanent. Most Fae who get humans within their rings leave them there once they've passed out anyways. Humans don't have the same stamina as we do, even with their boosted energy from the ring. The first woman passed out, that's where the ancestors got their silly tale from." He spoke tightly, like he was debating even revealing this bond at all.
"I see." You replied, even though you had many more questions and didn't have a full grasp on it all.
Not much made sense. In a span of hours you found out the true existence of a hidden realm, and these magickal creatures. You met one, you slept with him, then you actually slept with him, and now you bathe with him. You talk with him, as if all of this is a normal day.
It should all unsettle you more than it actually does. You should be freaking out, 100% meltdown level. This is the story of fairy tales, and maybe not a good one. This could be the big bad wolf and you could be little red riding hood. But somehow, you were comfortable in his presence. Comfortable enough to want to spend more time with him. To learn more, about him, his world, and this new bond.
So you leaned forward and wrapped your arms around his neck, giving his lips a small peck.
"Maybe we could... figure it out together? See what happens next, if you explain more to me, that is."
His eyes lit up with hope, and his charming smile returned to his face. The thought that you could wake up every day to that smile entered your head quicker than you could blink.
You'd figure something out. You had to. He couldn't leave your life now. Not when it seemed like it was just getting started thanks to him.
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But again, please be gentle in your criticism! I am but a sensitive soul.
“Hi lix.” You chirp watching your boyfriend grab something from the fridge.
He smiles upon your voice, moving to face you but your hands trap around his waist, squeezing his back against your chest. His eyes crinkle as you sway him side to side.
“Hi baby.” Now he finally turns around in your grasp but before he could say anything he’s cut off with your hands slipping under his shirt.
You bite your lip as you watch his reaction. Gliding your hands along his waist, over his abs, finally resting them back on his waist. He’s flushing red, looking around to make sure no one else is near.
“Have I ever told you how much I love your small waist?” You whisper and he’s gulping. “It’s so perfect.” His eyes are lidded not being able to resist your touch.
One hand wraps around his neck to bring him closer to you. Your lips wrap around his addams apple and he’s moaning. A hand shooting up to cover his mouth.
“Fuck, babe not here please, let’s go in my room.” He can feel his cock strain against his shorts, wanting to melt onto the counter you had him pushed up against.
He felt helpless, your mouth was licking and sucking his neck and your hands gliding along his torso, the other one rubbing him through his shorts. A pitiful whine leaves his throat as he throws his head back.
Felix was to sensitive for his own good, so it always made your job easier and teasing way more fun. You pull away abruptly, making his eyes snap open.
He’s met with your figure walking away, cutting around the corner. He whines loudly following after you.
“Not again.” He huffs, running to follow you in his room so you could help him with his problem.
@/yong.lixx
warning: some swearing here n there, but pretty much none.
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divider credit — @benkeibear @strangergraphics-archive